Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Rich Vos, Mike Cannon, Rosebud Baker | TrenchFoot

Episode Date: October 4, 2021

This week Rich Vos guest hosts with Mike Cannon and Rosebud Baker as we get into hack middles, the positives of Botox and remember some comics past. https://www.patreon.com/robertkelly Bonus Episode, YKWD Overtime, LIVE FROM THE SHED AND MORE ON PATREON DUDE!!! https://twitter.com/robertkelly https://twitter.com/YKWDpodcast http://instagram.com/ykwdudepodcast https://www.facebook.com/YkwdPodcast/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hoy es un día de eso de no saber cómo va a acabar el día. ¿Dónde nadie pregunta, ¿dónde viene? ¿Sino por qué no te viene? Y una ronda es el tiempo que pasa en preno, conocernos, y no creer olvida. Hoy es un día de eso, que Madrid nos vía. Hoy es un día de eso, que Madrid nos encuentra. Maú, la vida es más vida cuando nos encontramos. Encuentra los bares de Madrid, la Dición Especial de Madrid nos liga.

Un humenaje de mao, a Madrid. en todos tus dispositivos. Pluto TV, ven a verlo sin pagar nunca. Siempre que se mantenga las terconstancias económico-financeras del solititante en el momento de la solicitud. back again. Old school, back in the day, we're all starting before them all. I'm being right, why can't I do this? Podcast is so fun and crazy. And there's no rules. Shut up, you're ruining this. Break the bar, damn it, I'm sorry. It's a comedy podcast. This is an NPR. That's the podcast done.

Is there any better show? This is the original. Original. Hey, welcome to, uh, what is this? original Welcome to what is this why kwd? My name is rich boss if you don't know I'm filling in for a Bobby. He's on the road opening for On tour with Louis CK. That's how he's doing? Yeah, Bobby's a good opener. You know what I'm here with two other openers, Rosebud who just Rosebud just opened for birth, Christ.

Christ say. Didn't you just open for birth? Yeah, I did. And it's cool. And Mike opens for Mike Fini. I know I fucking butthole. I'm one of those guys that opens the club like the first weekend Oh, yeah, where they're just still beta testing everything and there's like half floods and the wait staff is all I'm the closest to club

Well, look we didn't do enough numbers and the boards come up And I'm here with Mike Cannon rose, but we've been a Dave had technical difficulty So we've been here for like 40 minutes, and we have nothing left to talk about. Yeah, we just, you guys missed the actual podcast. We nailed it, but now there's nothing left. We talked about comedy, addiction, kids, people we hate. I've never seen you as engaged and interested as you were during the real conversation.

Oh, no, I'm not studying for a role. Bobby's. What a way to back a minute. I, uh, uh, no, I mean, I like because I like you too. You add a, you know, I mean, there's comics you have, but you know, they go, uh, you know, you're just, you didn't say anything just now. You just made noises. Well, there's comics, you know, you, you know, you, you, hello, goodbye, but I like you to like working with you guys.

And, and, you know, and Bobby said, or the producer asks, who do you want? And I go get whoever You know, I don't care songs are sparkling white is you too Fuck I feel like I'm at a wasp convention But no, and you know what I think rose like what do you think what do you think? What do you think I saw that's, that sounded like the forest gum moment when he's like, thought. Well, because I like when we were sent out to show the one night, me, her and Andy, and he looked at my tattoos and he goes, roses, he goes, he even got tattoos about her,

right? And some of them I go, I only sleep with headliners. But here's the thing. And then turn them into medals. I've worked with them. No, no, here's the thing. And real quick, and I'll get, I've worked with, I've had Rose, but on shows, we've worked together,

we've got, and if I, like if, we did that tent in Connecticut. Yeah, we did a tent, we did a stress factory. Two tents. Two tents two tents. Yeah, so like if that was Bonnie and a comic kept working with her and stuff. Right. You know, I would go Are you fucking them? That's what I would say or in my head. Yeah, I would think you know, cuz I'm very attractive So I would think Andy will go Is forced to breathe.

You know what's so weird is he he was never even not even concerned even a tried to go down on her and rings fell out of her Like it. I love your hair. Oh, thank you. I love how quickly Michael I'll laugh and then I'll be like no, but seriously dad Dad they're her my feelings. I show hair gray who died there hair gray. No signing how you know because I always and Bonnie like I always want now Especially after listening a female comic in the middle because it's such a different perspective what happened last night? I did someone nighter and it was just some Hockey Hockey Urban comic and in the whitest room.

Right. And it was just so horrible. And what he crushed right. Well, but go first of all white people are the biggest hypocrite pandering fucking worse human beings on the planet white people. No, they really are worse people are. No matter what the situation is. I love whites personally, so.

No, no matter what audience wise they saw. Yeah, no matter what the sky says, you know, third, look, I was doing the stress factory one night. Those three black girls, and they were great we're talking. And I go, what are you doing? I mean, what do you, you girls, and they were great, we're talking. And I, and I go, what are you doing? I mean, what do you, you know, they were celebrating. She goes, Oh, was celebrating. It's, it's her birthday, right? And the white ladies next to her, I mean, there was five or six middle eight age white, they started clapping, right? I go, you wouldn't

be clapping. If you move next to her, do you, you know, she moved next door to you. You fuck on me. Right? Because they're phony. Yeah, but did they turn to you and say, well, statistically, they shouldn't be here. So they succeeded expectation. Excited. So last night, so the guy was horrific. So when you have, like when you're headlining your headlining, you know who you want in front of you.

You want to bring who you think is funny or who you think will make the show better. That's all. I should have Katie. I used to think I still do. I haven't seen her. Uh, uh, uh, Becky owns girlfriend Katie. And again, she's, she's, she's good. She knows you and me. So funny. Uh, and she's a complete off speed pitch from you. Yeah. That's kind of what you want. It's like sensibility wise. You want it to match in the sense that it's not going to be completely opposite and weird from your audience.

But you also don't want it to be a carbon copy of what you discuss, what you talk about the way you tell jokes. Like that couldn't be a better joke. I want to joke teller. I want some of you tells you I just have Adrian, who's fucking. I apologize. Yeah. So you know, so you she commissioned when I used used to what do you call it? Adrian's perfect too because she's so goddamn dark. That after that, it's all green lines. And plus you know the audience is gonna hate or so I'm gonna kill. I'm only, she's so wild.

But when I used to judge Rose Battle, I used to see so many funny. Yeah. That's why I saw you, Katie, you know, just there was so many funny comics. Yeah. That's why I saw you Katie, you know, just there was so many funny comics. Yeah. Yeah. Do you know what's funny though? It's like I, and I'm at a position where I can sometimes bring somebody, but not all the time. But I do, I would like to ask a female to open for me because I do like that. I like that off-speed pitch. I like that. It's a completely different

perspective, all that stuff. But I feel like the stage is set where I don't wanna come off as weird. I think, we're spending a weekend together. I'm not, we're not really that close of friends. You know what I mean? So it just feels like an odd thing. Well, yeah, I'm not talking about, when I go on the road, these are local jerseys and mannequins. I go on the road, I'm not making enough money

or big enough to bring a middle. They have a local middle if they give, you know, 20, whatever. Right. You know, but I mean, even like Northeast weekends. No, yeah, but what I don't like about the local features is that they'll go on and they'll fucking kill with like 25 minutes of just like references,

like just local references and they're just murdering and like just local references, and they're just murdering, and you get up on stage and they're like, ew! Like, they just like, they get so upset because you're not talking about the fucking ice cream con or whatever the fuck place they go to on Fridays or where their kids sell drugs behind the back. Or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or or, or or, or or, or or, or, or or, or or, or or or, or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or wherever that I'm not going to be able to make and now you're setting me up to fucking fail and they know they're doing it. Well, they try to try to be gunslingers. Yeah, they kind of follow that. Oh shut up. You stink right. Yeah, come to New York. Yeah, come to New York. Do five minutes.

Yeah, that's just that. And the whole thing I got at it at is she's working on his film and I'm not. I mean, that's in the video. I was like, all right. I'm supposed to, where are the guys going? I don't know. Yeah, he's the end of local. You just want to work with people you like or you connect with or you have, you know, I, you know, what I deal with in life,

other comics might deal with in life, other comics might deal with might, some might. So it's good to be with them instead of for me to be with some fucking, you know, comic that's fucking in a dressing room drunk at it or fucking mind or high or something. You know, I've been, you know, I go in dress rooms in certain clubs and you smell so much pot and you're like, you know, I go in dress rooms in certain clubs and you smoke so much pot, you know,

what? And I'm not saying they have problems or not. I have the problem. Right, right, right. I'm the problem. You know, I can't wait till I get the confidence to smoke weed in a green room. I always go to the side of the club like a fucking beta. Well, I mean, at a respect, at least,

or I get headlining, you can do it. Yeah, you're right. Really? Because I still feel weird. No, you can do it. I mean, I get the comics, the middles. What did the guy last week? Computer just fell apart.

Oh, there. Literally, the computer just fell. The computer itself collapsed. I gotta tell you, the look of just disarray on the whole team's face is really fun. Because Joe is the happiest angry, but the two of them, Nicole, I've never seen her face this way.

And she's literally, he's trying to find a wire to hang himself. Well, when you say team, when you say team, if I own this team, there would be a lot of trades tomorrow. There when you say team. Oh God. Oh, wait, no, it's the worst when I get the middle. There goes, can I sell? What did the guy last week he was so oh he had he had bumper stickers mm-hmm he had a comic book he made a comic book but he had three series if you bought all three you got the bumper sticker free and he also had you know

like those bracelets like the you know the like snap bracelets no the little rubber ones oh like a little strong yeah yeah yeah like like ones that were cool in high school yeah yeah all yeah, all right. So he was selling them and He goes kind of silly. I go yeah down the fucking hall Yeah, that's funny when they're like a roadside stand. Yeah, and they just have merch that has nothing to do with what they're doing up there They're like selling key to just candy bars. I get me I gave it to Bobby is in here I think he put his there is no way a candy bar survived Bobby. That's the new documentary It's not it's surviving our Kelly, but it's a Snickers and Bobby. I don't I don't go after people's weight

Right after people's weight. Right. Right. Anyway, so they're selling, you know what the thing is, I didn't sell anything until I got my first CD or album. Because you're a comic, you're not a fucking variety store. Right. You know, I mean, I don't know. And I never say no, never. Some people rich, some people use comedy as a way to get into opening a store in Chinatown.

Yeah, yeah. Okay. And here, some people, this is just their way in. But also, you almost have to agree with the just general sense of having to sell something because the criminality behind the pay for feeders is so brutal that it's like yeah I totally get why you felt compelled to sell something because you're you have to be losing money. Yes I would never say no right because I'm not you know the money I'm making and the money

they're making yeah I don't care if I sell my CDs or not I you know what the fuck yeah and but you just can't stand first. They have to see me first. Because do you pay your features extra? Do you do you pay out of your own pay? A lot of times, not a lot. I'll tip to feature some. Sometimes it depends how much I'm making or how much I like them. It depends how much I'm making or how much I like them. You know, if they stink, if they're just locals, you know, they're not, you know, but it depends who it is and how much I'm making. I don't want something.

I'm not like crazy a tell that those hundreds around, but I don't make that kind of, I make decent, but I give them something. Yeah. Or do you? I do, but only when I'm like, when I've brought someone that is, I feel like above it. Yeah, sure.

I mean, where I'm like, you're doing me a favor by being here. Right, right. And I never have to worry about that. I have saccala. I just give him a bird's seed. I just throw Burger King under his hotel door. Who's fucking two medals? You're whole crew, I like your crew.

Yeah, it depends. You want to give them something. Yeah. But I feel like if they're at a place where they feel like, if they react to me asking them to feature, like, I'm someone bigger than I am, then I'm like if they react to me asking them to feature, like I'm someone bigger than I am, then I'm like, your chance to get more money just went out the window. Because now you've made me feel like I'm doing you a favor. You know what I mean?

But if you're someone that I came up with and I'm like, hey, would you come feature, because I just wanted to be a fun weekend and I want a fun hang, then I'm like, I'll pay you to come to fun weekend and I want a fun hang. Then I'm like, I'll pay you to like come to my weekend. I had where I want to play golf with somebody and I'll go, look, we'll just co-head line. Even though that person's not ahead, I wouldn't really headline or I'll just go, I'll give you some money.

I think that happened once. But maybe a cancel, I'll give you some money. Yeah. I think that happened once, but... Well, maybe a cancel, I don't remember. It actually, I canceled it and I made an announcement on Instagram. But I've never had a headline or back in the day, give me extra, I had a club or once, give me $20.

Yeah, it's really different now. Like, I think the way that things are now compared to the way things were when you were coming up, I feel like there's, I don't know, you might say it's entitlement, but I also feel like it's just the way that the market has changed because there's so much money to be made in comedy now.

Like there's so much, I don't remember, when you were coming up, like your generation of comics There were like two that were doing arenas, right? Max well, but yeah, I mean back now Yeah, but when people are coming up they gave him sacks of coins. Yes Yeah, they did arenas, but his name was Caesar There are so many comics doing theaters and arenas and and it's like

there's just so much money to be made in common. Yeah, comedy is too popular. That's why we're having all these problems is it expanded beyond people that actually like it and has now reached the general masses and that's why we're getting in trouble for saying fun. Well, also too and I talked about this downstairs. I was talking about this with Mike when I was coming up and this isn't downstairs, I was talking about this with Mike when I was coming up and this isn't it. And it's not an excuse, but it's reality. We didn't have Twitter, Instagram, Facebook to promote like comics do now. So a lot of it now is promotion over comedy. A lot of it.

There's comic. I mean, there was never, ever a time I would go into a club and on Thursday night There was a YouTube star because there was no YouTube, you know, yeah, so you know We didn't have the days of our lives. They like to they have did they have the soap opera meet in Greece? That's when It started to fall apart. Uh-huh, but they would have the soap operas like in the day Okay, or a Sunday wait. Well, what they they would have soap opera operas like in today or a Sunday. Wait, what? They would have soap opera stars would come in and do comedy clubs. Yeah, do do. How long? As if there's no other thing. I think that was only East Coast. I don't know.

I think there's like appearances that happen all the time, whether it's like soap opera or drag or something like that. That's an alternative to what stand up is, they bring those people in on slow nights, which is like, listen everybody, completely open to make their money in certain ways, but it does dilute. Well, I get it. How would you then do it?

You're switched wrong with, I mean, there's nothing wrong with club owner. It's gotta do what they gotta do to stay open. I have to do what I have to do to pay my bills. But when you have an internet or a YouTube or whatever, and this, I'll tell you how it ruined in New York. And Joe Schmo walks in and watches it and goes, what the fuck, I'm never coming back here.

You know, so it's, but then again, that YouTube is going to sell out two shows on Thursday. There's 20,000 other idiots. That'll buy those tickets. In a second, she'd a worst thing to have in the coming of New York. Is those glasses? Was your dollar store.

Oh, all right. Literally my grandma's glasses. You look like a fun art teacher. You look like you stepped out a candy land. Miss Lippie from Billy Madison. Yeah, just fucking, just smearing lipstick all over your face. Candyland Miss lippy for Billy Madison Living lipstick all over your face calm down low budget Nicole Like that was better than what I know I left it both real hard budget That was a cold headman was a corner

Even that mean That was a cold headman was a corner It can't show us even that mean Oh, I mean a low budget to cold kidmen. It's like her without all the fucking plastic You just don't got I really did get so much Botox this last time that I was like I can't I can't ever go back I could not I was trying to hail a cab. I was like oh my like my eye was like, I can't, I can't ever go back. I could not, I was trying to hail a cab. I was like, oh my god. Like my eye was like, this is, this is bad. Yeah, I went to a gay guy. He went, he went nuts.

He's like, I have the serum to take. Ooh, yeah, he was like, I keep buying shit. All right, boy, it's twice online. To wipe under your eyes, you get rid of the bags. It doesn't work. It does nothing. No, you got to get filler. What's filler? Oh, yeah, you have to get shots of the bags. That's nothing. No, you got to get filler What's filler? Oh, yeah, you have to get shots. Yeah, I'm not doing that. I don't know. You'll look so weird I think when when men get worked on they look bizarre. Yeah, look at Dane

Look at Dane man. He looks like I think isn't that like HGH like what is he? Oh, I don't know I mean, I'm just I'm just seeing his face age? Like, what is he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he, what's he You look like you've been through a couple battles, like you're in the eighth round of something. That's also what it looks like when you start shooting shit in your face and you're a dude, and you go through weight fluctuations or whatever. What hit? Well, what can, okay, say a guy, and I'm not doing any of it, because I'm already, I'm done.

But say a guy got a facelift. What is it? They cut up here and they, that would get rid of the bags under your eyes. I have no idea what a facelift. I don't know. They like they make an explosion back here and then pull. I think they pull you. Yeah. Imagine them in your face. No, you walk around with a fucking tight face. That's got to be horrible, right? Yeah. Yeah. I have no interest. I clearly put on moisturizer. I would get I would get get, uh, uh, what do you call a liposuction to date, but even that is not healthy.

Where would you get it in my stomach? Because my upper body's fucking muscle, but over the pandemic, I gain like eight pounds. You don't need life. You gain more than eight pounds. Got life. Yeah, when they suck the fat out, but you don't need to do that for eight pounds. Maybe ten pounds.

You could just work out though. I work out all the time. I work out. I do 500 crunches. I lift it today. I did back my upper body's smoking, but when you get older, okay, how's your diet? And my, let's not get crazy. Right, dude.

I'm not working. I don't want to go crazy. I just want to spend $50,000 to get this removed. How much do you think it costs? Probably $12. I think $50K. No. Have you ever watched the LIPO Suckton? Look it look it up mush. What's the what how much is light?

Oh, there's no winner now. I'm asking him why might yeah, somebody go literally podcasting from a log cabin Tom Sawyer Like Owen Benjamin show What did you say it says three thousand3,374 as a 2017. As of 2017. 3000? Yeah, for what though, not for to stump, that's probably for to chin or to face.

Yeah, that's like a little bit of life. Yeah, that's the average fee for around the country. So, no way, it's gotta be at least 15,000. I don't know, maybe it's just so typical now that it's gone. They have probably group ons. But here's the thing. If you get like liposuction, I saw I heard and my look at my left hand is getting

me. Yeah. Yeah. About lipos. If you get it in your stomach, the fat is not supposed to come back to where you get it. This is, I don't know if I'm right about this. Yeah.

I only read the headlines. So if the fat is, it's got to go somewhere and it might build up around your heart or something. And it's dangerous. Oh yeah. Well, not to mention, then you're, you still look weird with your shirt off because it looks like your belly button is a sinkhole.

Like everything is kind of just spilling into that area as opposed to like naturally kind of gaining shape back. Yeah. I mean, I like I got pure stomach. Once you have stomach muscles in life, you don't lose them. You just get that over. You know, I got pure, I might shit his dope. Yeah.

Sometimes when I'm jerking off into mirror, I'll flex and I come like a jack rap. Why are you looking back at the mirror? You're looking at your tan ass. Sometimes I'm like, oh, you kidding me, it's so fucking brown. Oh, I picture you with a Johnson and Johnson tan line. Just like a brief where it's just white on your ass. You're like, the one.

The staking is waste for a parent hit. Oh, yes. I'll spank me and go, who's a bad girl? Oh, you don't even have to change the rings. That's a polish up the nails. You know, I don't, I wouldn't do any of that shit. Like the bow tie, like, I can't believe that rose, but comes on air and goes, I did bow talks.

Like, isn't that something that girls don't want people to know? Yeah, but they all do it. So that's why I just, I don't care. Well, look at her, you can tell. It's for care just I don't care well and look at our you can tell it's for Can't fucking tell I'll tell you can't tell everyone Do it in your eyes like what do you look at her forehead? Yeah, and I do right here. Why why you want to just you got bang I don't get anything my cheeks

My yeah, so yeah, that's to cover the incision Yeah, that's how they do Botox. They plot your forehead open every six months. It's like $300 Botox, I heard, right? Yeah. First of all, Rosebud doesn't do the normal Botox. Her family is like a high up Republican elite family. I got my recommendation from Emma Wilman, okay? I wish Brad had her own.

Wow. Yeah, but Emma'd had it around. Wow. Yeah, but Emma would talk about it. Oh, she's really. No, she wouldn't give a shit. She would not care. Emma. I do like that you spend all that money to make sure that this is like pristine and nice

and then you have the simple jack bangs. Listen, they're not simple jack, watch it, watch it, sass of grass. I mean, we in a box, you could really buy nice clothes. I have nice clothes. I'm out. Rose, but it's so rich. She dresses like this to fit in.

Yeah, I'm trying to make you guys feel comfortable. Yeah. They're leaves. She's wearing gold chain mail underneath. Gold leaf skin. I have solid gold tits. So that's it. Try to stay casual.

Some James Bond tits from Goldfinger. So 300 bucks. Yeah, it's 300 bucks. You go in. I know people I do it. It lasts for like, it depends on your metabolism. Uh huh. If you have good metabolism, it's 300 bucks. You go in. I let's I know people I do it. It lasts for like, it depends on your metabolism. Uh-huh. If you have good metabolism, it lasts like three months.

Really? Yeah. So like I run, I run like three times a week. Okay. So if I'm, if I'm running and I'm doing cardio. Is your body and silver catch you? Sorry. They're not all good.

I hated that. So did I. You felt it. I didn't even, I didn't even know what happened. You said sorry before it even landed. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Sorry, sorry. Ah, ah.

I do that too much. Just ran out the door. I say that right when I go and say sorry. Sorry, everybody. Sorry. I've been starting sets like that, where I'm like, I really hope this goes well. I don't care.

I'm saying you're not supposed to. I don't care. I'm not supposed to. I don't care anymore about being funny. It's so, I don't see the point. Anyway, we'll get into that later. Is that fucking, can I ask? The potential crisis. You have to get it right when it wears off though. Like, for you every three months,

because people that do like say steroids, and you do a couple cycles and then you get off. If you don't maintain, you get bitch tits, your stomach gets all fucking bloated and weird. No, that thing about Botox is like, if you get it twice a year, you're still preventing yourself from getting wrinkles because you're getting wrinkles

from using those forehead muscles a lot and like getting those lines. That's all there. I don't, I literally can't. I can't. I am tired comedy. Yeah, no, I can't move my fucking forehead. I'm paralyzed from my eyebrows up. When I try to lift my eyebrows,

it feels like lifting weights. Like, it's so hard. That's thick. It really, I'm like, this is the best I can do. So you gotta stop it. You're gonna get addicted to it and it's gonna fucking ruin your forehead already. I can do it for like four years.

And it's great. But I love the fact that you don't even know, so you haven't even unlocked full rosebud potential on stage because once you add facial expressions, you know, I mean, I want to save those for my third special. I'm telling you. Holy shit, she's moving her face.

She's doing act-down. Way to just wipe forehead. Holy shit, it cracked. You move your eyebrow, piece your forehead, falls at your foot. You know, it's so funny when you say you don't care. Like last time I was coming back from this gig. Yeah.

And I go, man, they pay me too much. Like my wife has a whole new, just outlook on life. And I wanted to call the people, you didn't have to pay me this, they paid me a lot for it. Monday night it was a lot. And my wife goes, you'd call me and you go, thank you, that was generous.

Not like I don't deserve it, because I deserve whatever I can get. But she was saying about comedy because you could do whatever you want on stage. You've already proved yourself throughout his, he goes, look at Norma Donald, the stuff and it's so true, but then he get normal, it's famous too. He was known for doing like, did you ever hear, did you hear the Larry King interview with Norm McDonald? Yeah. How fucking funny. So funny. It's so funny. Or did you hear him on the view when you talk about Bill Clinton's murdering you? So funny. Well, then he had that sincere side where he was also talking about BB King and wanting to match his live

dates and being like, you know, like earnestly, like I never got there. And they were like, oh, put their hand on his back. But that kind of, that attitude and that comedy is so fucking funny when you just don't care. Yeah. Instead of tap dancing for the audience, you know what I mean? Yeah. Do you know who's my favorite at doing that and who I like kind of came up?

You're doing a podcast with them. That's one of them for sure. I mean, you're entire school of people. You know how I feel about you. But Kurt Metzger. Oh great. Metzger is one of those dudes that truly looks like he does not give a fuck whether or not people are enjoying it or not

because he understands innately it's hilarious. Like he's so confident in his own ability. How funny is his stuff on, he is so fucking funny as a standoff. He's my favorite comic. He's so, I mean, he's at a level. You know who else got so fucking good at Shane Gillis? Yeah, Shane's awesome.

Like he used to, I used to bring him to open, and he was good comic. Yeah. Whatever, he was just fun to hang out with. And I watched him for an I don't watch too many comics for an hour. Yeah. It was just amazing. Well, I think once you have like the entire country calling you a racist, yeah, it probably is pretty easy to let go and let God just perform for 200 people

that came to see you anyway. Yeah. Shane's hilarious. Yeah. And there was another another guy's really funny. He used to be on Anthony's podcast, the sidekick. Dave Lando. Have you watched him? Yeah, he's really good. He's really good. How is he not, I mean, he's known now because he's doing some big conservative podcast. Yeah, yeah. Uh, I'm out or something. Yeah, that guy, whoever he is. I don't know. con volotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca. Spectacularismos, linces de película y un sinfín de aventuras te esperan. ¡Fliparás!

Huelades de Madrid, Amurcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros. Volotea. Tarifa sujeta a disponibilidad, consulta las condiciones en volotea.com. one radio show. There was so much liquid in that run. Did you hear that? It sounded like a family was drowning. Back your throat. My house was finally one cat. Would you suck it up with your mouth? Yes, I said yes. No, I started. I, I, I fell asleep. I got septic tank. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, a radio interview, and I only did one, ask me about norm. You know, I worked one of them twice. I wasn't one of these people that we were,

I worked one of them twice. Yeah, yeah. You know you're so good and calm when you cannot, no one could steal what you do. Like Kevin Meeney, only Kevin Meeney could do what Kevin Meeney did. You know, yeah. Really enough though, a lot of all kids have tried. A lot of all kids have done the Meeney, only Kevin Meeney could do what Kevin Meeney did. You know, really enough though, a lot of all kids have tried. A lot of all kids have done the Meeney in their own way.

And it's not, it's not ever materialized in as much success. Do you know how many comics coming up, Stole or try to be like a Brian Regan or a David Tell? I tell it's like the most. A voice. You didn't show many of them. No, but, but Norma Donald, Kevin Meeney. Dane also. Dane is a big spawner of people.

Oh, yeah. Burr is a big spawner of people. Yeah. Louis. Or I don't get burned overrated. But I don't know about Luke. Colin. Colin is one of those. Yeah, nobody could do that. No one could do that. You know, Hicks was like that. Hicks used to walk across the stage back and forth, you know, and then people have tried to take like the tone of that, the philosopher thing and like turned it, I mean, there's a lot of young open mic or forever open micers that take on that persona as if they're this guy that has more to save than the laugh. People have tried to rip off Hicks so much that people say Hicks isn't funny anymore.

We say it. Yeah. People have tried to rip off Bill Hicks so much. People say Bill Hicks isn't funny anymore. Well, people had said that before. Yeah, no. There were people saying that. Yeah, but Hicks, here's the thing with Hicks too.

I worked with him a lot of times, twice. And I don't know. I worked on the road with them a couple of weeks at a time. You know, yeah. And one day we were in 7-11 or something happened. The next time he did 10 minutes on stage, it was right. And I was maybe doing comedy for two years three. I'll never be as funny as long as I live. He one died at 33. So I mean, look how young he was. Two to he was doing this stuff So long ago, and it was way ahead of his time, you know stuff. He was talking about then people are talking about now. Yeah, you know

I mean, I've I've like homage to him in bits about psychedelics because you can't not It's like talking about it without referencing Terrence McKenna or something. He's so embedded in that world. Yeah. You almost have to. Yeah. And there's also a bunch of like albums that are cobbled together from stuff he would never have released after he died. So it's what a lot of people say when he's not funny, it's like, yeah, he wouldn't release that out there.

Like that's, yeah, Mike is the biggest Hicks fan of both. Yeah, Mike's just got access. Is that a Texas thing? The Texas thing, but I think it's funny. He love him. I thought he was, this is my opinion. and I'm, I thought he was better than Kenison. I like Kenison, but I thought Hitch was, I don't know. I liked him more than Kenison.

You know, I think Kenison was my favorite. I mean, I thought, I mean, obviously Kenison was Kenison. But he liked it, but Kenison was also a firework. I mean, he was, he was amazing and then awful. His, his second special where he walked them out on leashes was like it was sad Well one the one guy that opened for me was funded and all was called the both this comic Do you ever work with him? No, no, but I heard his story on Mark Maron's podcast That's maybe the most heartbreaking tale of all time. It's so sad

But I I've worked with him and seen him work. He was so good. Deep Mike, do you ever see Carlebo? I got to work with them. It was, he was awesome. Unbelievable. Yeah. He destroyed, every time I worked with him, he destroyed either of Hyenas or even

it's like a barf, someone saying, Angela, he was destroyed. And like, what's amazing. He was on the Kennis and Tour, the outlaws. Yeah., he was on the kennis and tour the outlaws. Yeah. And he would go before kennis and they made them go earlier because kennis and couldn't follow. I mean, he was just fucking just a powerhouse.

Yeah. You know, uh, it's kind of, it sucks because you wonder what somebody like kennis and could have developed into where it's like if he allowed just the art to drive him as opposed to all the other bullshit, because his stuff was so fucking smart. And ahead of its time and questioning religion and powerful and in that type of like prowling a minister way, like who knows what it could have become, but I mean, you know.

Yeah, I think he would have reinvented himself to some. You know, I mean, but he was partying, you know, he's hanging out with major rock stars and they're fucking not. You know, you're, you're, you're a kennisin. You're fucking wearing a fucking over the long coat. Right. You know, when fucking coke, you're hanging with fucking Leslie West or whoever. I don't know. So I think it's just a part of the, you know, when you, when you move out to LA and you become, you know, Hollywood, because Hollywood shows you as like this thing, this character, and then if you are under enough

of an influence, you start to believe that that's who you are. And then you just try to, it's the same thing that happens to podcast hosts. Like you literally, you see these podcast hosts start to believe that they are actually like smarter than everyone. And it's like, no, there's just a lot of people that are very lost. You know what I'm saying? And, and so are you. Like, it's this, it's this thing where we want to believe that we are more important or that we're like, there's like a legacy that we have.

And I think, I don't know, I look at like, Kinnison and I'm like, that's what happened there. He went to Hollywood, he started to believe what everybody fucking told him, and then he fucking died. Yeah. Yeah, I get that. And you know, when you get that big and famous or whatever you have

Yes, people all around you. I've seen it right and whatever you do. Yeah, that's good. That's good. No one will say no one's gonna tell you what I work with Chris on the Oscars fucking Jenny like if Chris said Jenny was the most honest you go you can't do that Chris. What's that? Richard Jenny. Oh, okay, you would say you, he thought you're talking about a woman named Jenny. No, no. No, no. You know, the first hot thing.

He would go, no. And he was honest. He goes, that stinks or don't do that. Yeah. And when you're not famous, you have so many yes people around you that are saying, oh, no, that's good. That's good. You know, you can't listen to those people.

And then a lot of people. And it's tricky because when you start to get famous, you have so many people around you that you came up with that get so fucking bitter about it. Yeah, yeah. And then you start to have to pull yourself away from those people because they're telling you like, you know, you start to feel shitty

about the good things that are happening in your life. But in the process, you become so isolated with all these people that are being like, yeah, yeah, yeah, you're great, you're great. That you don't have anybody to like keep you humble. And it's this weird thing, you know. That's true, I never looked at it that way about the people you came up with.

A lot of them have anger and resentment. Well, it's in New York, it's in New York. We, this is one of the things that I think New York that bothers me about New York, but it's also the reason why I stay here is like that New Yorkers, we love hustle, but we hate ambition. Like we wanna see you hustling all the fucking time,

but God forbid you want success. You know what I mean? The second you fucking get success, everybody around you is like. You know what I mean? The second you fucking get success, everybody around you was like, oh what, this fucking happened to you, you piece of shit and it's like, Jesus Christ. No, they always think.

They stink. Yeah, it's always you fucking stink, you know, or like something good happens to you, everybody's like, fuck you. And it's like, what the fuck? You heard me? Yeah. you everybody's like, fuck you. And it's like, what the fuck? You heard me? Well, I love, I should be a married or a comic, because we hate the same person on the ride home.

Right. Have you guys ever disagreed on like, on hating somebody? No, we disagree with comedy a lot. What's, you know, she's set up punchline. She's a writer. Yeah, you know, I mean I write I you know I was just different Yeah, but we have we both love comedy. Yeah, you know, and we see the four we see we can see a fraud right yeah, you know Spot a fraud in the business. Mm-hmm. You know, but the public doesn't know

in the business, but the public doesn't know. You know what I mean? And you go, hey, look, it is what it is. You come to the, I'm not competing with anybody, but myself, even my wife. I mean, sometimes you get jealous, look, my wife's an executive producer on the Netflix show right now. She sold another show. You know, she's on fire.

And, but we're not competing. Yeah, there's no, you know what I mean? And with different comics, but we both can spot bullshit, right? Bullshit, you know, and but we have different tastes to her. Who she thinks is funny and who I think is, you know, right, right. Funny, you know, it's just but when we come together on somebody, that's a great ride home. It's like fun. It's like fun. It's like fun. We used to drive home and we, me and her, and we like them. We like them.

They're friends. We would do to scar brothers all the way home or we would do Wendy Lieben on the way home. Just Mr. who I think is a great comic. Yeah. I used to love her with her. So many people from Boston copied when he leaned.

And that was another one that they copied. Yeah. Well, but she kind of got it from Don Gavin. You think he was a misdirect? Oh, yeah, he still does a little bit. I mean, he has this great joke and he's done it on an album so I don't feel like telling him it.

Who the fuck is Don Gavin? Don Gavin is like the godfather of Boston comedy. Well, so Lenny and Sweeney. But he's one of the, he's like the oldest, yeah, oldest of the bunch. And he's, I mean, he still drinks like a fish is just whatever. But he has these jokes where I worked with him in a Rubat, raise room.

And every night he was talking about how we were driving to the club, which is hilarious, because we're staying in the hotel where the club is and everybody knew it. But he's talking about how he's like, and I'm driving and I'm speeding. And Mike looks at me and he goes, down, slow down, you're doing 85.

And I looked at him and I go, so are you. I was just fucking love that kind of joke, man, where it's like, it's simple. It takes a second. You're like, oh, man, that was right there. It's so smart. Yeah. But he was a mystery. She was, I mean, if you've

known a lot of his stuff, some of it is, but I think just maybe the percussive delivery and the rhythm of it kind of kind of feels a little similar. But Wendy then took it her own way. I'm not saying that carbon copy. It's like, it's kind of like when you watch comics from Canada, a lot of them have that same kind of like rapid like I got to get this out before I die like someone's gonna kill me in five minutes. Are you just saying Nathan Mac and Mac. Yeah, but Nathan Alex Cvon Dave Mourhez, Deb DeGiovani. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like all of them have this kind of like a Steph Tola was another one where the the pacing is similar for comics that come up in a certain area.

That's rough room energy. Yeah, yeah. And similar, like Whitney Cummings talked about that years and years ago, she was like, you have Belly Room delivery. Because back when the comedy store was still a shithole and nobody was going there, the Belly Room is like knife fight comedy. So you'd have to try to like, you know,

beat people over the head with punchlines. We did that in Jersey one night. It's for years. Yeah. Those one. You know, I mean, some stuff like Maria Banford is at a whole nother level in comedy. Right. You listen to her. You're going besides the material, the characters of going this fucking.

It's unbelievable. But I also feel like she's someone. I mean, where did she come up? She came up in L.A. right? No, I think Minnesota. Oh, yeah, yeah. She's from Minnesota. I think you're mid. I think she was a San Francisco comic for a LA, right? No, I think Minnesota. Oh, yeah, yeah, she's from Minnesota.

I think she was a San Francisco comic for a while, like part of that pattern. Yeah, Greg Proops, those dudes. Yeah, I feel like there's certain comics. You're supposed for a little one. It was Baltimore though. Yeah, started in Baltimore. Yeah, there's certain comics where you can see that they came up in rooms that gave them the time. Yeah, right. You know what I mean?

That gave them the that allowed them the time to figure it out, like to get their own pace. Like, I regret sometimes the way that I did, I did like, LOL, right? Yeah, same. And LOL was like, absolutely a night fight. Every fucking night was just a, yeah. It just awful, awful shows.

I mean, I would go home and like read the Yelp reviews for that fucking place just to make myself feel better. You know, just, but you know what now is to be like, oh, I was performing for people that were being robbed. So it's not necessarily all my fault, you know? And I, and sometimes I wonder like what kind of comic I would be if I had bin in rooms that allowed me the time to just really figure things out But I think your bullet proof because of that because then when you go in a room that allows you to figure it out like downstairs

It's like taking the donut off the baseball bat and then you have a light back You don't need to be bullet proof when you at a certain point you don't have to be that. Oh, I don't do it now Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I go like, okay, yeah, I'm bulletproof, but I needed that for like the first four years. And now I have the time to like, you know, relax. Like 25 years ago, it could be 20. I was doing the Eastern Comedy Festival.

And you were in groups of like four, and I think Maria Bantford was in my group. And she was having a tough time. And I'm looking at her going, this girl's fucking brilliant. These are your dumbest human beings on the fucking planet. You know, I'm going, are you kidding me? You know, I work with Norm McDonald. We were working at the comedy stop in Atlantic City, which in the day the room was a coat room. But it was a big, you know. So it was me hosting this guy, Teddy Bergeron, from Boston, full-blown alcoholic at the time. I don't know if he's alive, so anything.

And Gambler, I loved him. Killed, he would kill. And then Norm would go up and they go, what the fuck is this? You know, for that Canadian accent, and they switched, they put Norman in the middle and then Teddy at the end. Teddy would be drunk out of his mind. The're the one who booked it. Oh my god.

Like I was on. I was hosting as someone y'all bring the Jew back. Oh my god. But you would I would watch someone like Norm going it's it's good that he didn't do well in that club. Right. Right. You know what I mean? Yeah, there's rooms that you do not want to succeed at all.

You know, and it's funny. You say that anymore because Nicole, the producer, she came out with me on the road for Fairfield Connecticut. Then we came back to the city and it's just like a completely different vibe. And then the last show was at New York comedy club 1230 at night and it was just like a completely different vibe. And then the last show was at New York Comedy Club, 12.30 at night, and it was packed, super hot, but wildly chatty at like similar night fight, but a positive night fight. But we have the tools to thrive in that situation

by told, I was like, I'm not gonna do material. Like there's no material as an instant loss. If I start revealing myself to these animals who just want the party, you know, then it's a total L and the only reason I know that is from doing fucking prom shows at 130 in the morning for my first four years of comedy. And that prepares you to basically do stand up

in a cafeteria. I've been feeling like I want to get back to that a little bit lately because over the pandemic, over the pandemic, I just, I didn't really, I was just not going up that much, you know, like I did road, I did road shit, but I never, like I never really did the park shows, I didn't really do the rooftop shit. I just was like, and in my mind, at that point, I just sort of had reached, I was like, I don't have to keep doing this to myself.

You know, I did this already, but you forget that, that's a skill that can be lost, that's a skill that really will go away. And now if something happens on stage, like it does bump me a little bit. Like it didn't use to I used to fuck drive in those situations. Yeah, but I don't think. Well, one, if you're listening and you don't know about comedy, to my can and Connecticut is going on

the road. But to most comics, it's an inconvenience. I was on the road. I was on the road in Long Island over weekend. We came back to the same night. You fucking never call Long Island the road but for whatever reason that's even closer And I called it the road. It was the hotel where 2, 9, 11 hijackers were staying. So seriously. So I think, I think the wrong about that road. I think once you have, it comes back. And it's like riding a bike.

It comes back. You always, yeah, you want to work that muscle in your head. That's why Norton is so sharp, because he does radio every day. Well, it's like riding a bike if you've spent a year in a wheelchair. You know what I mean? It's not gonna come back like that.

No, not like that, but it's still in you. Yeah. You're still, you know, you've experienced it many times. I mean, like I said, Jersey, we did club, one nighters that were fucking knife fights. Right. They should have had chicken wire in front of it. I mean, just brutal.

There was a clubbeddie's fireside. They said, three commas go in and none come out. It doesn't. I mean, just really tough. And I think what makes a lot of comics a stronger comic, if that's the kind of comic is when you host for a long time and your hosting shows were like five comics six comics because then it becomes your show and you direct it and whatever someone has a tough set you go back and get them someone kills you do so and that's if you're that type of comic like like I, you would never see like a norm or Maria

Bamford hosting, unless it was Maria and friends. Right. And it was. Yeah. You know, I'm curious if if if if Norm did, I mean, I'm sure he must have, if when he started, he must have hosted at some point. He probably did open mics or guest spots. Yeah. You think he, I couldn't see him hosting. Yeah, I mean, I don't know. It's certain comics. I think also to try state area comics, just we do so many one-nighters and rough rooms. It's a different breed of comedy, but you can go in anyway. Look, back in the day in New York, I would do the seller or whatever, and then go do

Lune Allounge, which was an alternative room in the same night. So I think it was more way more different opportunities or different, I guess, diverse audiences than when you go. But now you go on the road, they have alt rooms on the road, they have kind, you know, urban rooms, whatever, you know. It's so funny, because alt rooms, like, we think of those as like very sensitive rooms, but then I think about alt comics,

and so many of them are just doing an impression of someone with special needs. And like, what about this is fine. I thought you were gonna say, and so many of them are rapists. Which is also true. Well, you say all comics like, I'm not saying all of them. No, no, no, I know. A lot of them, you know.

Well, they think this is what they're supposed to do. Let me go up and not get laughs. So the other comics and the bad thing about it. That's like old alt, new alt now. It's like almost ripping off 80s comedians where they're just like almost hacky on purpose. Oh yeah. And it's supposed to be ironic,

but it's only because they don't know how to write a superior joke to what's already... Well, it's like satirizing something they never understood in the first place. I'm like, how the fuck are you gonna satirize this? You never even learned how to do it. You know? You get somebody like Taglass who can do all room fucking best.

It's just, he's so fucking funny. He's pure comedy, man. It's just so funny. And he came up doing the one night as we did back in Philly These fucking Hell gigs, you know back in Philly, but that's what it takes. That's why it takes a a truly Original voice a true artist as Quiffy as that sounds to get through that shit and still become Todd glass and still become Maria Bamford

Yeah, who all of them cut their teeth and shit rooms and norm and whatever. And then they have that completely original nuance, take your time, voice where it's like, they could have been broken by the road. I've seen a bunch of comics that started out with an interesting perspective and then go into fucking vague areas and where it's like, they just have road all over them. And then you see stuff like that and you're like, okay It's possible to not be like have it extinguish your full light

Right, but also two road comics can be as funny like oh, yeah, it's arrogant and it's you know I did it I did road comics. I mean road is in like appealing in middle of the road easy bullshit. I work with comics that probably wouldn't do that well in the city, but kill on the road. It doesn't make them bad comics. Right. It makes it's just a different type of a style or comp. You know what I mean? It's a cereal material. Uh, you know, but then also you see New York hacks. You see road hacks. You see, you know, but then also you see New York actually she wrote actually, you know, everywhere you know, whatever, just good and there's bad fucking carpenters, there's good and there's bad artists, there's good bad comics, whatever, you know, it's just, I think you got to stop with the noises. The noises. It's crazy. I'm losing it. It's really bad. What do I see? It literally sounds like you just down to mucinex

Yeah, you sound like TJ Miller's old commercial crazy. It feels like something's living in your throat First of all, first of all, I'm going through I'm transitioning Into what I had long a swamp monster I had a swam monster. I don't I don't sound I don't hear the saliva. It builds up. It's funny. It's possible. It's because I need you to listen to this podcast. I would rather listen to you to be to listen to this fucking bullshit. Okay, yeah, maybe I'll start it now already. It sounds like a homeless guy's jerking off in the back of your throat. That's what it sounds like.

Again? Jesus, sometimes it gets a little scratchy. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, Oh That is wet boot territory Your throat has trench foot Your throat sounds like your basement And they're gonna drive home. Oh, man did we get him? Hey, Rose what that's just this roping Oh, we miss bumping each him? Hey, Rose, what are you doing about this? We're just in this roping, we're in this bumping each other,

we fucking flip the car over. Can I tell this quick thing, speaking of that, Bobby and Voss one night called me in succession, like trash me. It just happened like that, right? And I had to leave the bedroom both times to just take this trash and Nicole's like hearing me giggle down the hallway

and then I come back in after boss the second person to call you know it gives and I'm like I walk in and she goes how cool do you feel right now I was a year man I do feel kind of cool yeah what were they trashing you man everything I don't know life whatever boss called me and bought well a with Bobby on the line to tell me how much white Lotus sucked And I recommend him to this level of It is fucking it. It owes me six hours.

This fucking waspy white fucking show that just made white people look bad. No, you're not getting the metaman. It's making fun of making fun of white people too. It's like it really is right. Connie Britain's character is exactly that. Like that character in that show is nuanced. It's funny shit. I said, which one was that? She was the older the mom.

The mom. So smoking hot. I wanted to eat her essence Friday night lights. You know who's super hot. What? From a. Oh, I've for cool. You know who's super hot what? from a Oh, I've for cool it. No, I watch Six seasons of it. I can't think of the name Madame secretary

Tara Leah Tia Tia tail Leon Right. Yeah boys. Is that it? Oh, I would push my wife in front of a bus I'm telling you I was stick my head under my wife's legs to eat her fucking and I look up at my wife and go, how am I doing? I love her. She's hot. She's hot. I haven't seen her recently. The last I saw her was like, dick and Jane with Jim Carrey. I didn't see that. I just watched Madame Secretary, just to get some knowledge of politics. That's why I get all my knowledge.

It's because I want to know how the White House works. That's cool. Yeah. That's what's the West Wing. So I couldn't come home to find out how the White House works and how the field workers are doing.

Oh. I mean, we are at time. If you guys want to do your plugs and do the extra. Oh, thank God. Let me get out of here. Say that for 11 minutes. What's that? It's fun to watch. I've been watching him struggle to try to interject.

He's just say we're at an hour. He's just the ability to act popping up. How long have we been doing this debacle? About an hour. We can do the plugs and then do the extra 15. Oh yeah. Boss, what do you got? You're the host.

Age. You can't say that now because. It's curable. It's curable. You just go to Germany. Really? Yeah, you get whatever you're curable or. They cured it.

You can arrest it. I don't know. I mean, they cured it. Really? Yeah, didn't they cure it? Germany literally cured it, dude, with HIV. Get the fuck out. Yeah.

Wow, that's fucking cool. Yeah. Well, if you're watching live, the Saturday you'll be at the Atlantic City Comedy Club, and at Atlantic City at the Claret's Hotel. Yeah. And then next week you'll be at the Stress Factory and New Brunswick.

Yeah, those two Atlantic City Comedy Club this Saturday, and next Friday's Saturday to stress factory, the end of the month I'll be at the MGM, Red Garage Room at DMGM. Nice. Just go to Ridgeforce.com. I'm sorry if you had tickets for Saratoge, I will rebook it and stress factory Lanark City in New Brunswick. So that already? I know, just throw it in, it's subliminal. book it and uh... stretch factory lanister yet i know just you don't want to subliminal

mic can in comedy dot com for tickets uh... the eight through the eleventh i'm doing a little run with brendan sagalo we're going through columbus ohio we're gonna be at the wall wrist and the ninth were in mchenry at the downtown theater which rosebud did not hurt was really cool uh... what which one mchenry i think it's on your own right downtown theater, which Rosebud did. And I heard was a really fun show. Oh, yeah, that's cool. Nice. What? Which one? McKenry, down down. Oh, yeah, that looks great.

Oh, yeah. So, is that the Adam Putt? I mean, you did that too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Aaron. Aaron's a good dude. And then the 10th and 11th, I'm going to be at Zany's downtown Chicago doing it. So I try to add shows, all that shit.

Tickets are actually moving. So get tickets, Mike actually moving. What an what an endorsement for myself. Yeah, but I got to that's what they're doing now. That's right. I'm very confident. It's a brand new hour than my special. It's it's it's really great. I'm solid. So come see me. And then oh, here's the scenario on this network left button great podcast with me, Brendan Zagelow, Mike Feeney, all that shit. All right. All right. You can go watch my special whiskey fists on YouTube. I am going to be at Salt Lake, I'm going to be in Salt Lake City, October 15, 16th. I'm going to be at Cobb's San Francisco, December 12, December 13 through like the 16th. I'm going to be all through Texas and all of those dates are going

to be on my website, rosebudpaker.com. Fucking, uh, everybody's working. Yeah. We're back. And then, uh, Bobby states, uh, Bobby will be an election in New Jersey, October 8th through the night, the celebrity theater. He will be in Huntsville, Alabama on October 14th to the 17th. Stand to plive in Smoney, Maryland, in the McGupey's Joe Karros, October 22nd, October 23rd at the governor's comic club Saturday, October 14th to the 17th. It's to live in Smoney, Maryland at the Mugumi's Joe Karras October 22nd to October 23rd. It's got this comic club Saturday at

October 30th and then Skankfest South November 5th. Yeah. Oh, that's going to be so. Oh, and it's got some sort of comic home November 13th at the. Yeah, we're doing. When is Skankfest in November 5th through 7th? Yeah. We're doing that. But a rubbery live dot com before Deets. Fort Smith, New Hampshire. I'll be there. BORTSMATH.NUHAM.SUR. I'll be there. Of course, comics wearables go get your shirts. We have shirts of...

We're YKWD, KALTA and KELLEY. A lot of the Face Start Sister Ping. And they'll be on screen with Mrs. Live. This is out. So... You know what? Dude? Stick around.

It's not over yet. This episode of YKWD is continuing now exclusively on patreon.com slash rubber kelly. Now open Wicked, this why I love it. Ready? Wicked good wholesale furniture. Come in and get wicked good deals on all your name brand furniture at 70% off regular retail prices 70% off furniture for all your rooms now don't be wicked pizza and get your smile ass

Don't I love it. I love these fuckers guys. Don't be a fucking wicked pizza get your smile asses over here just over the pits, pits, the Phil's Phillips Berg Bridge. It's right in a three 16 town center, Boulevard, Eastern PA. Also check out the website, wickedgoodferentature.com. Or just call them, 610-438-4829. I'm gonna say that again, 610-438-4829. I'm gonna say that again. 6104384829. All right, you mentioned the podcast. You get free delivery and setup. That's Bonnie. Hold on. Hello? Oh my God. That was a really

good experience. Hold on, I'm doing a podcast. I'm hosting with Mike Cannon and Rose Bud. Hi Bonnie. Hi Bonnie. Oh my God. Is this for your life has come? No, I need you alone for a couple of weeks. You think you had a heroine experience. You think you had a heroine experience. Yeah, I'm filling in for Bobby. Oh my gosh, I started to think you guys were the same person. Why? Because you're always together. It's like you and Bobby, you and Bobby.

Yeah, he's my friend. I'm sorry. Oh, he'll do 69. What? Nothing. That's disgusting. I'm working vacation. I'll call you from the car. I'll call you from the car.

When I say, hey, congratulations to Rosebud on her special. Congrats to you, Bonnie. Congrats on selling your show. Thank you, Bonnie. He's too. You guys are the best. All right, listen, thank you. Uh, thank everybody for listening. Go see, uh, go to my cannons website, Rose Buds rich false calm support comedy. Thank you, Bobby.

Uh, uh, you can hear him on Calton Kelly. He's got all his dates up. Mike, Mike, were you working? Uh, I will be in San Antonio, uh, the 23rd of October. It'll be at Skankfest. Cool. He'll be at Skankfest. A lot of us will be at Skankfest. Yeah. I'm going to go, I got to go swallow. Goodbye. You've been listening to the YKWD podcast. Thanks for listening. Now go back to your shitty jobs. you