Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Russian Doll Wife Beaters

Episode Date: January 22, 2018

Bobby is joined by The Bayridge Boys Chris Distefano and Yannis Pappas and comics Mike Vecchione and Cort McCown to discuss deep meditation, catholic tattoos, and where Chris's loyalties lay. Surprise Chris, it's Sophie's Choice! Who will he choose? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're listening to Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude on the Riotcast Network Riotcast.com Welcome to the funniest podcast on the planet Earth. This is going to be a cost-effective podcast. It's not a podcast. It has no rules. What are the mic-ass holes? I'm sure I've already said should I regret it? Can I get a mic?

Oh, fuck the fuck. That was trying to keep it like a comic-head. I have a bunch of you guys on just us sitting down And sometimes it's hilarious sometimes it's 10 no topics no directions. I love doing it Side to the coin The day you think my podcast is popular I might some of these lines. You never know. It's Robert Kelly, so you know what to podcast on lightcast.com. Whoa. What was that?

Whoa. What was that? Shit. I know it's coming. I knew it was coming. I knew it was coming. I knew it was coming. Yeah, there's a hiss in my audio. It always starts right when you get the fucking electronics

down with this shit. Everything's working out like four good shows. Ooh, things are great. Subscriptions up. YouTube views up. Downloads up. I got a hiss in my fucking headphones. I hate the way you say up.

Up. Up. It sounds, that sounds like a technical issue. Up. And now, and then there's fucking some blippy thing that just happened, and I look over at you and you're going, just keep going. What does keep going mean?

All good. Oh. All right. Well, someone goes out of the deal with Bob Kelly. And that's with Jav Talk. All good. Oh. All right. Well, someone else had a deal with Bob Kelly. That's with Jav Talk. All good. Oh, fucka. Just keep going, job boss.

All right, we got a great show today. Fantastic show today. Actually, I'm very excited about this show. We have, what are you fucking hand-gesturing? Oh, telling her I can't believe it. Oh, okay, I'm sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry. I don't know if you hand

gesturing me to shut the fuck up like something's happening. We got a great show today. Gabby, go through the list of people on this fine YKW dude. Okay, we have Janus Papa who will be here. I always go this way. Don't huff me. Don't ever huff me. It was the hissing in the microphone. It wasn't her. It was the hissing. I'm trying to get the listen, Mike, you don't know her. Don't stick up for her. It was the hissing in the microphone Yeah, it wasn't her off. She was the hissing. I'm trying to get that Listen Mike, you don't know her don't stick up for her. You know what? I'm turning my look white women have been put down for too long By you by guys like you know your time's up dude Times up the dimples in this room fucking annoy me There's a lot of fucking the dimples in this room fucking annoy me God who do we got with court McCowell and court McCowell who is my friend for so fucking long

Hi buddy who who brought me to Vegas? I mean we used to the palms of playboy Tower I mean we had some fucking fun. Did you just touch me gently? Yeah? Zip-upper jumpsuit you're just yeah because I'm not a piece of shit And I know these savages are coming up not all you want to you and I don't want fucking her Chasticles hanging out she's 20 chesticles. I'm, I'm not 20. Yeah, she's not 20. She's 20, how old are you? I'm 24.

Are you 24? Look at me. Are you 24 or 22? I'm 23. That's great. Wow, that's good. That's good to get the truth out of them. So Liz and yeah, it's hard to these days.

Actually, it's too easy and they fucking blog it and then you're in trouble. to these days. Actually, it's too easy and they fucking blog it and then you're in trouble. Yeah. Um, so, but yeah, we used to do the, uh, the Playboy thing, you and your pal, what's his name? Paul Hughes. Paul Hughes. You used to write, you guys ever do that room? No. No. No, no, no.

Palm Sotel. I used to do the hard rock, which was the fun hotel. Then they opened the palms and the Playboy next to each other, which became the funner hotel. Yeah, it's fun. And he, he and this other fucking lunatic booked this comedy show there. I was like, those are Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday. And it was in this old school fucking Vegas showroom. And they just had this big huge like curtain. They would drape over it and shut it all down and they would have a Playboy playmate would would open the show everybody close the show oh Dumb as a fucking stick my favorite my favorite story ever is that one Where the girl the girl that was dead man. I have that photo somewhere so me

The most because you know easy he throws up. Yeah. So I used to like, I used to say whenever we'd go to radio together, I'd always try to throw some photo and try to get him to puke. And you know, and he always knew it was coming. But if you could actually get him to look at it, then he would start, then I'd start.

Before he's going to the end of the story because he's not the storyteller. But I have to set up. No, that's the set up because you're a constant. That's not the set up, you fuck. That's it, that's it that's towards the end when I'm about to do it then you go do because you know he likes to be and then you do it you're fucking now they know it's a fucking disgusting story but yeah podcast Mike right here I guess I'm sorry you two fucking nitwads are doing you show I'm

sorry oh the fucking show of shows you're on this are doing your show. I'm sorry. Oh, the fucking show of shows. You're on this show to promote that show. I'm a nun, you're on show to promote my show. I'm on show to fucking, Yannis isn't even here. Yeah, look at you got you're gonna work this out today, by the way. We're working on it. I gotta leave early. No, you don't.

Yes, I gotta leave by four. He's gotta pick up my kid. He's got mouse. I gotta put food on the table. I thought you a fuck. First of all, you don't have to put food on the table. It's a kid. He's got mouse. I got a foot food on the table. I thought you were fuck, first of all, you don't have to put food on the table. It's a kid.

They eat fucking nuggets and three fries. Real happy. I'll get a little part. I'll pay for you. It's paleo. I'll pay for your kid for the month. Okay, I got it. Is that what you mean?

Wow. Wow. Wow. Mara Mothamiki D's. That's great. Some cinnamon raisin toast. How about the $6,000 a month in child support? Hey, that's not my favorite. You could hang have about the six thousand dollars a month in child support hey that's not my good fucking hang with the Puerto Rican for a couple more years

if you did it now you'd be paying two fifty a month I picked a worst year now you have to do it when you a fucker making the most money you dumb dumb yeah yeah I just got a show and CBS let's break this shit up what an asshole Just a bang and extra That's terrible. I'm not deleting that so what yeah, well, it's none of its we edit on our pocket. I don't have any I don't have to we don't

We don't like to put people we don't put people at risk the fans requested six months no sex for me Six months no no sex. Shut up Chris, even I don't believe that. What are you wanting to do? We got the master. The master. The six months are six months starting now. No, six months, no.

I can't just step on your intro. Harley, you don't do road gig radio. So Mike Vecchio and the master of the fucking dig, the the dig, the A-K-A, he just sits there, but then smashes your face. Yeah, Hulk. Punch up.

Yeah, punch up, punch up, punch up, punch up, punch up. I'm sure it might be. Punch up, Mike. He's not the main guy, but he's definitely behind the scenes. Help with the main guy. I'm right there, sniping. I don't want to expose myself. I don't want to get a pack.

I'm sensitive. He'll make Chris better. Yeah. I'm exploding. I'm exploding he'll make Chris better yeah yeah Mike's right the fucker waste Just had a salad Beat juice take it from me Take Chris is sensitive about its hips. Okay, he's got him. He's got why him and fucking Jared Frieda just boxy people I know and scopo to is another

Worse scopia. He's like a lunch lady oh god I think these guys are voluptuous thank you we should celebrate can you spas the rack here no let me take my medicine just pass it but I want you over there of course we got Chrissy D yeah we got dimples D the fucking cutie hell yeah guy who's fucking this industry will not allow to fail. Chan's after Chan's after Chan's. I had one of his chances, that he fucking sat.

Fucking cock's saga. Ah. Fucking smile. That smile lights up a room. Yeah. All these fucking Dimples, you guys all have great smiles. And great hair. You got a great smile too, Bob.

Fucking row of fucking great genetics right here. Courts 53 years old. I know. That's amazing. Look unbelievable. Thank you. Pepper. Yeah, for a 53 year old. I mean, he doesn't look 19. Do you do more to work? No, don't even work out. No. Do you drink? No. Tell him where you're from originally. Oklahoma. Exactly. That's great. Yeah, but what is that what do you what's the thought behind that? I just said it. I thought I just go with it. I know you're gonna fucking investigate it Everyone to be an investigative reporter. Yeah, this isn't fucking Rogan. It's fucking like it. W. Stupid Yanis isn't here. He's coming, he's always late.

Maybe somebody stepped on his sneaker. Yeah, true. He's gonna come in with snooze chewing tobacco and I'll stay with breath stinks. I did it as, oh anyways, I don't want to get into it. So anyways, we're doing these gigs, right? And I fucking hate these playboy playmates. I can't stand them.

But whatever, this one that he gets is this, I know, La Asia, fucking Taiwanese, or something, right? She's sweet as hell. She's just, how, how are you, you know, and she's so nice and she's flirtatious. She's me and Al Dabani a friend of mine. She's flirting with us backstage. He's on stage with talking about all kinds of stuff.

I was like, give it to Threesome, wanna go have some fun with us. Oh yeah, sounds good. Which Bobby is this, by the way? This is first bad Bobby. I think sexy. Oh, yeah, you were you were an amazing Shaky sexy Bobby. Oh sexy Bobby. Yeah, it was fucking members only Bobby 30-inch waste Bobby. I had fucking jeans with unicorns in the back and Nobody said shit

Nobody said what are you gay? They were like, dude, you look good. So I remember she's talking to us. I mean, she was getting us whipped up, man. And then we're ready to leave everybody. And she's like, I'm coming, right guys? And we're like, yeah, let's go. And yeah, because we used to take,

we used to just to interject. We used to take all the playmates up to the playboy club We had like a table in the playboy club. So everyone would go up there and just you know throw down to like four in the morning Yeah, and so so we're sitting there, but she's now here's the deal. She's changed. She's doing a basic instinct to me and now Well, he's up on stage. Yeah, she's got no panties on she's flipping her legs crossing them High skirt, hot nothing. And we're just like, God, dude. I'm sitting there shaking like fucking,

I'll follow the rod and heaven, please let me do the right thing. I love my wife. I love my wife. She's my girl at the time. I'm my girlfriend. I can't do this, right? And so anyway, she's like, we're going. So we're about to leave. And we all get up. She gets up last. I'm about to leave. His all get up. She gets up last. I'm about to leave his friend.

What's his name? Captain. Captain. We had a guy who escorted the playmates everywhere. So we kept it. Cool. As ice this motherfucker was smiley, but not too smiley. Okay.

Kind of stoic, but not too stoic. Perfect guy to deal with these playmates. As I'm getting up, I look at her seat and I go, oh my, and he grabs my shoulder, he goes, relax. Everything's okay, you're gonna be all right. Everything's okay. And he points to the back of her dress and he goes, it's okay.

And I went, oh, and I looked to the back of her dress and there was this spot. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. She, I looked to the chair again, and I immediately throw up. I have to go to the bathroom. She had a period and her on the seat you can see the outline of her pussy and her asshole in blood. I got a picture of it. I put a picture of it. I'm like a Rorschach, one of those like Rorschach things. Because it's like you just look down on the sea and you're like, you know, like those like those prints or something. Yeah, well, you have to find the asshole. If you look close and you let your eyes

kind of phase out, you can see her lips, the outline of her vagina, and then the fucking wrinkle of her balloon knot in blood and I was in a Horaesle blue not looks like a little balloon knot, you know, yeah, and Bring it I can't even show it fucking booted up this channel Yeah, dude, I have a I have the photo what I wanted to do is get it framed instead of everybody I have the photo. What I wanted to do is get it framed instead of everybody for Christmas that year. But if you turn it one way, it just looks like art.

If you turn it vertical, it looks like a great little, almost like some art that somebody didn't fill in. 1963. But if you look close, if you turn it horizontally, you look close, you can see that fucking butthole. Oh, I was just, you can hear her go, what's wrong with him? And then we rushed her out the door and then I came back and I was like, what's up? What's going on?

And he's in the toilet because there was a bathroom right there in a green room. And he's just, he's just leaning over like, oh, he came back in and he pointed to it. Because I was, I was on the outside, I didn't see it. And Captain walks her out, then he points her and he goes, right there, look right there, then he goes, well, then he just starts throwing up again. It looks like somebody was stabbed. It looks like a stabbing.

You ever see a real stabbing with his like a little pool of blood? And then like marks where the body was. It's like you didn't feel that can women feel that? Can you feel when it's coming out? Yeah. Oh, how are you? She was pretty messed up though. She was like, she was getting hot.

She was, I think Bravis the word that we're looking for. She's great Bravis. Yeah, that's different. Now Vegas, all you get to do is we get to go to fucking hang out with Brad Garrett at his comedy club. Not anymore. Oh yeah, that's right. Last day.

Vegas. Comedy Central. No, Comedy seller. Oh yeah, that's right last day. Yes comedy central. No comedy seller. Oh, yeah Salah right across the street. Oh wow. They're there today. It's the the room is being framed in it is it's being framed in and I saw the plans and It's pretty it's pretty amazing. Yeah, it's pretty dope dude. It's pretty dope. How's it gonna work? I don't understand and it's pretty amazing. It's pretty dope, dude.

It's pretty dope. I don't understand how it's going to work. I need to get over there. I don't know. It's going to be fluid. It's going to be fluid to begin the comics from that day. That's a great explanation. It's going to be fluid.

Well, we can't just get fluid. I'll just say it's going to flow. It's going to flow. Just like the girl in the chair. It'll flow. Blah blah blah. Oh, of course, let's flow. Blah blah blah. Oh, of course, let's introduce our guests on the couch.

What's up, dude? What's your name? Hey, I'm Dave. Dave, what's happening? What do you do, Dave? I work in telecom in Quincy. Quincy, Massachusetts. Home of Duncan Donuts.

Sure. Welcome. Thank you very much. Go, Pat. Go, be sure. Yeah. Why are you wearing all-tanned, Dave? I'm trying to blend in. I realize, I'm sorry. All right, now it wearing all-tand if I'm trying to realize I'm sorry Responsible what what what the fuck would you fucking

He's a teacher. Yeah, what are you a self-help guy now? Could you not I'm trying to speak my truth Small cup of coffee I hate it I hate it. It bugs me. It's a small, you're a grown man. Yeah, but from a deli too. It's been sitting this since I was six. It's from downstairs actually. I support the comedy seller.

Oh, you're in it. Well, you're going to support them in Vegas, not to make a quick segue out of your fucking coffee joke. Dimples. But yeah, it's going to win. When is it going to open? You know, I think in March this summer Here's what's good. Here's what they want to do because we went I went out there with them to go to a bunch of comedy clubs

We snuck in as like what do you do part of everything like that? What do you mean like you what do you mean? You went like you had to go They asked you to go. I kind of have to go. I'm part of this Also, oh, you have ownership in it. I don't know. Maybe. Whoa. Fucking entrepreneur, Bobby. Bobby making moves. Well, maybe you'd be nice to me. You go to the fucking comedy, Salavegas D. I have no pull. I do a mic, not with you. Not with you. No, listen. So anyways, they, they, they, it, they, here's the thing, this is what I got from Vegas rooms is that you go in and it looks like a sitcom, like a sitcom room.

Like they had a room and they had to make it look like a comedy club. So they put some curtains up, they put some things up here and they put a bunch of photos of comics that never played this fucking room. And now it's a comedy room for some reason. And I think comedy, it's, it is what it is. I mean, they're not the best shows. Yeah. Well, it's tough. It's a tough state. I did it nine years there. Nine years I did a show in Vegas. And how many? Nine years. No, nine, nine, nine, nine, nine, nine. Noin. Noin.

Noin. What room? That's what Bobbude said. What room? What room? Noin years. What room? Noin.

That's what I was doing. I thought you were dealing with me. I'm in a room. I'm in an open-air. Interrupted at the beginning. You were an open-air. Nick fucking past tense. Now I'm a Jim and Sam fan.

Me too. You said, no, I'm kidding. I'm everybody's fan. I just love everybody. I'm one of the good white people. Go ahead, court. Oh, so anyway. No, but Mr. Court, look at that hair. But the funny thing is, is like, I'm just doing most.

I know my mom would be attracted to you. It's infuriating. Who's mom wouldn't? I know. So like any of our moms are fucking hearts. So fucking heart. Yeah. All right. No problem.

But they, but he was in the movie stand by me by the way. Can't buy me love. Can't buy me love. Sorry. Nice try. Stand by me. I love bringing up. What a douche.

The fact that I have to say bring it up and she's going to computer in front of me. Quarter back name. Quarter back name. But they, but the problem with Vegas is it's all fucking DJs. They don't give it. They, for the most part, they don't give a shit about comedy. you and so in it the problem is now today for for Vegas is that everywhere in Everywhere in every city has a comedy club right every city has a great comedy club

And you can see just about everybody in in your city at one time or another so when people go to Vegas now They're like why would I go do that when I can go see fucking dipshit, you know, who fucking spins, who spins records. You know, and they spend, well, that's different age points too. But I'm just saying that there's, there's good, we used to have kind of a fun thing with it and we had it was kind of a cool room. And I think comedy sellers got a shot because it's like a really cool vibe. It's got a cool vibe to it instead of just being a comedy brand Comedy seller. Well, it's the first time the brand is actually branding out and it's gonna be the people know the comedy seller with Why you're a good looking guy? Yeah, look at him right next to him on Aldo fucking Christ. Pick up the camp by me the first one

See it. Yeah, right there. Click that there is there is a charade of me here who later became uh Rico Suave wow look at you dude bad asthma the fuck I'm fucking great look at me in the great what's that eat the grapes go to the grapes that's Ronaldo who is that that's Cristiano Ronaldo oh sorry I'm sorry I'm running up on fucking hot dudes I give right yeah Gil. Why do you want to watch me eat grapes? That's weird, that's creepy. I don't know. Look at that picture with his thumb up. That's it.

Look at who takes those pictures. You are dope. That was a cocaine photo right there. There is the last one right there to the right. Right there, there he is. You look a lot, you got better with H. You look better, yeah. Yeah, he's like a, a uh... doesn't look good

there is a great word now i think you look good there nobody looks better now he's better he's better with the honor yeah like all these references you guys are making does the offman easy that guy patrick fucking flanagan patrick demsy demsy yeah the great sending mancini died right yeah she she

she had a stit of an overdose. Anyways, they, the Vegas, what we saw when we were out there, there's this. There's the, the MC, who's okay, never heard of them, never did anything, but doesn't matter. They probably pay him no money to come out there. Free Hill Tower, maybe 50 bucks, I don't know. I used to take, I used to take really good care of the comics that came out there. And that, absolutely, you really did take care of comics.

And then the middle guy whoever the fuck that is, had again, no money probably, nothing, hotel room. You're there for Tuesday to Monday, I believe, right? They fucking beat him up there. 14 shows a week. 14 shows a week. Now, and then you get a headliner, but they get headliners that,

they'll get a good headliner once a month. Every once in a while, they'll bring somebody in, pay some money, and blow a wad. And the rest is, fuck you, let's just take the money. And you get the tickets, and some of them you go to, and there's no wait staff.

You have to go to the bar and get your own drinks, and then come back to your seat, which is fucking nuts. I mean, that's a comic, to see somebody have to get up and get your own drinks and then come back to your seat, which is fucking nuts. I mean, that's a comic. Yeah, it's not. To see somebody have to get up and get their own drinks, that means you can have as money as you fucking want. Right. I mean, there's no pacing.

And it's distracted. They'll just get up in the middle of your set and go do it. And then the other one, I mean, they look similar too. The comedy seller, what they're going to do, they took a room. They're starting from scratch. They ripped down this whole fucking room where Eddie Griffith had his room in the real. They ripped the whole thing down. They're starting from scratch, replicating, I believe, like the village underground.

Sick. In some way, okay. And low ceilings. Sick. It is, it is everything they've learned from doing the seller and the villagenda ground. They're taking with them to Vegas and replicated it. It's very, very important. The room is very important that the actual room is the shit for comedy. The room. And then the green room... He keeps saying it on purpose.

The room. The green room is going to be set. Are you UM? Yeah, that's what he's what he said the green room when they had it set up But he said green room, but then it was room when they had a room when they have the green room At the other different part do it. Yeah They and they split it it was literally half the half of the room was his green I walked into the green was just as big as the actual showroom. He thought it was a sneaker store.

And there was photos of like, shadows. That's, yeah, you know that, right? There's photos of him up. Like if you, if a Joe Greenroom, why would you need to see you? Like why would you need to relax looking? I don't fucking get that.

He's into my eyes. Oh, he's hilarious. But I'm not even kidding, dude. This, the, it was the size of the village on the ground, his green room. fucking get that. He's into my eyes. How hilarious. But I'm not even kidding, dude. This, it was the size of the village on the ground, his green room. That's how big this fucking place was. I never saw, I never went on there. One I couldn't do, I couldn't watch him for three hours.

He does three hours, I'll say. Just like two hours. Yeah. Look who's here. Well, let's hold on to the anchor. Let's, let's pant it up. Keep the camera. How's the company seller gonna work, by the way, in Vegas?

Is it gonna be a headliner show? Well, yeah, I'm getting to that so they're redoing the whole room. We're talking about the comedy seller Vegas How you doing? Yannis yeah, Yannis is late again because he doesn't care about people's time because he's a sociopath Sorry, no, I mean I mean He genuinely doesn't care about anybody's time you told her you were gonna be late, right? Yeah, we knew you was gonna be late, right? It's good jacket though, Cousin. What's up, guys? Oh, yeah.

Oh, we ignored you. Yeah, didn't even look like a take the top of it. I see him every day. I gotta say I'm meeting somebody new, you know? That's court. Hey, court nice to meet you. I hate freshly taken, you honest. Why?

I love freshly taken. No. But we back in a half hour, I love a five-hour. What you worried about. You just like, as it shows my double chin a little bit. No, you look good, bro. You got a strong jaw. You got a strong jaw.

Thank you. Yeah, Cuzzy. You ripped up. You ripped up. You wore that shirt like two days ago. What are you fucking talking about? You get my palpiment and it's mad at you. He's an asshole.

Well, that's what I have to deal with. That's what Instagram does, because in all of the, you will wear that. I'll step on your neck to get to the next fucking row. Which neck? No, I only have a couple of good shirts that fit. I got to hide my body. Why do you have to? You have to hide it. I have I fucking tits. I'm not a succinum. His head and his body look like they belong on two different people. You've seen him naked? Yeah, I've seen him get naked all the time. Why?

Because we're people. Yeah. We're closet homos. Do you guys fuck around? No, no, no, no. But I think his fiancee started to think that we're gay. Yeah, she brought it up yesterday. She's like, are you guys gay?

She said it serious. Like, are you guys gay? Why? Because we hang out a lot. We hang out all the time. So what? Yeah. You hang out naked? No. I mean, sometimes, sometimes I think my shot. Why did you see him? What?

Why? Sometimes naked sometimes not. Why did you see him naked? Or bisexual. Yeah. Is anybody ever seen Mike Vecchio naked? No, no, I want that to happen. No. I won't let it happen. You could feel that Mike's in good shape. Yeah. I'm in pretty good shape. I feel like if you took off Mike's shirt, there'd be a wife-beater and then if you took it off, there'd be still a wife Like a Russian like Russian dolls Just a smaller wife beater

I invited a Christy yoga I got my stretch What did you stop everybody has to start doing? I have high blood pressure high cholesterol. I have to take care of myself I'm glad pressure. Yeah, bro, but it's going down now though. Just trans-exities, just to meditating. You don't have to do yoga, just meditate. I've been trying to, yeah, meditating in green tea. Green tea has caffeine.

Oh, I'll be beneficial. Why would you let this guy have a lot of problems? Hang on a second. Why were you late, y'all? This family stuff. Okay, let me ask you a question. We can't fight with them now. I thought of a baby. We had a family.

And he's just squeaked it up, family stuff. You know what you think you got away with it? You're like, I find he moved on, come. But I know Bobby, he's still harping his back. I didn't say a thing, actually. It was your boy Chris, Colin, you were fucking phony. This piece of garbage. He was like, you're a sociopath.

You don't care about anybody but yourself. Well, that part's true. But... Honestly, honestly. Right. Right. Right. Right. Honestly, honestly. I like it. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. I was like, yeah, I knew the odds of you showing up here are 230 almost zero. I knew that coming in. What is that? You are late a lot. I know. You're late all the time.

You know what that is. Disrespectful. It's sign of, you don't have enough respect for whatever you're showing up to, because I know when you're not late, when you get a gig. No, I'm late for that too. No, it is a sign, but Bobby, it is a sign of narcissism. In narcissism, that definition of people being late, it's a big thing that they do.

Listen to Dr. Christus Definite. But also could just mean you're black, okay? Whoa! Whoa! Oh, here we go. Trump? Blacks and Greeks run late. We just run late. Really? Yeah, black time.

I want to know what it is. It bugs me about Greek people. Anything you do wrong is Greek. Anything you do right is Greek. No, those are Jesus. Can you just be a fucking human asshole? I do have a theory though. I do have a theory.

Is it a Valfetta? Sorry. Sorry. That was good. I know that was good. Here's a theory. Is it involve FATA? I'm sorry. Sorry, I'm sorry. That was good, you know, that was good. Here's my theory. Ooh, I just got pictures of the new comedy seller. If you want to see them, I can't show them. Why?

I can show them, not on camera, but I can show them. Ooh. Oh, it's got that. It's got a warehouse. Oh, wait, you see that, oh, it's gonna look so good, Chrissy. We'll get back to the comedy seller stuff. Everybody who's listening, where are that?

But go ahead, finish your thought, because I want to hear this. Here's my theory. Please, tell us your theory. They black time. They'll in Greek Greeks also have something called Greek time They make we make fun of each other because we're always running late. Yeah Greeks were enslaved for about 400 years blacks were enslaved for but I think it's people who've been enslaved Love their freedom so much that they just don't like we're speaking Greeks would slave for 400 years Yeah, how long were black people enslaved? About 400.

Yeah. So they're gonna get over it like you guys soon? No, we'll never get over it. I didn't even know you guys were enslaved. What about Jewish people? Jewish people on time. Turks, Turks, Yadda. Was it as bad as the black people?

No, it was different. It was different. Nothing was as bad as that. That was the Holocaust, but that was quick. Jesus. It wasn't drawn out. It was for years. They were all bad. that. That was except the halacost, but that was quick. Jesus wasn't drawn out for you. They were all bad. It's weird when you compare bads. Yeah, it's weird. Bad is bad. Yeah, bad is a bad Yeah, but I'm the only one that has to deal like head on with his mind of like I was in Albany having a good time And then I just wake up to a text me honest this that says in the raw truth of nature in the game If seducing and destroying the weak for appetizers and

destroying the you and destroying the strong use of our own ego against them pure joy my friend pure joy Rest in aligning yourself with death and become an expediter. It's inevitable. I don't respond He goes how's the pancakes in Albany That was the next tech and I have to wake up because I don't respond. I'm just like I can't respond to this And I have to wake up because I don't respond. I'm just like, I can't respond to this. No, it's just his mind. I get the brunt of his mind. It's just fire, I wake up to 30 texts.

I'll be like, what is this the group chat? It's just Yannis's sweeping arguments about Socrates and Plato and everything. And I'm like, what the fuck is going on? Oh yeah, oh yeah. And you're just wondering where you can get a stromboli. Yeah, that's it. Yeah, I just want cheese. These guys are definitely fucking each other

And Janice is the top I'm a powerbottom. Yeah, that's why I got these big hips. Yeah You know, it's like you can hold that man. Yeah Last last podcast Buck Bobby was talking about how you better be careful. Cause I could blow out. You could blow out. I told them that when you walked in.

I know. But he's got good height on him to carry. Yeah, everybody, here's a good up. It's a super slow. You don't have to height. John Favreau has good height, buddy. Doesn't he? Yeah, he's a tall guy, like him.

But when he blows out, he blows the fuck out. And if he blows out, it's over. He knows not over. You're just gonna have to get that other role. You know what I mean? There's the friend. Well, that's what that's casting director sometimes tell me that I have leading man face

with best friend body. I've heard that. I've heard that of you. Ah! I have more of a stunt double. Yeah. I have three line cop. You guys get him?

All right, let me know I'll be in the back. Sergeant catches me. I'm in trouble. Uh-huh. Well, I mean, look, you are late a lot, but that's a choice you can, I am never late. No. I'm never, ever, ever, ever late. Can you say that with a German accent? I have never late ever. It's rude to be on time. I like, Yannis shows up in a leather coat too. He's like the bad boy. Yeah, I like selection bargain hunter. Yeah, oh, you're a nickel chaser. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, I am too. I refuse to pay full price. I refuse. Go to Banana Republic in Bay Ridge.

It's like stealing. Second by Santa Claus. Okay, guys, I got to do a real quick review. I'm going to take a P real quick. I didn't read the first one. Did I? Did you read the first one? Did you read the first one?

I didn't read the first one. I didn't read the first one. I didn't read the first one. I didn't read the first one. I didn't read the first one. I didn't read the first one. I didn't read the first one. I didn't read the first one.

I didn't read the first one. I didn't read the first one. I didn't read the first one. I didn't read the first one. I didn't read the go to Banana Republic in Bay Ridge that it's like stealing second by Santa Claus. Okay, I forgot guys. I got to do a real crew. I got to take a P real quick. I didn't read the first one. Did I? Did you make me read it? Did I? No, you didn't make me read it. It's not necessary. Oh, really. Yeah. All right. Deepdiscount.com. Do you like Deepdiscount? Love it. Come on to it. Yeah. All right. Here's a deal. Go to the link right here. I actually, I told everybody, I got a DVD play for Christmas and I blew Ray and I use it and I go to deep discount all the time. I use my own code and I buy stuff. I have a kid and plus I like getting DVDs.

I like watching the same thing. I like a bunch of this, the same stuff. Scroll down please, for the love of God, will you scroll down. Oh my God. Where is it? Where's the one I just bought? Next page. The next page. Anyways, deep discount.com. It is a great site. It has a loyal sponsor to my show and you guys use deep discount and you use my code. That's why they keep doing ads with me because you guys are great. So please use this code. The loyal sponsor to my show

is a great site to find thousands of movies, TV shows, without spending a lot of money. You know what your favorites are, and you know you don't wanna waste time. So much time searching for this, what is that? What is that? Did my brain take that off the table, please? Just shut my, the whole place is vibrating.

I thought I was having a stroke. You know what really is great about Deep Discount? What? There's a lot of movies you can't find out because YouTube shuts them down. Those like streams. Yes, yeah. So you gotta, the best is,

if you have a like stated grace was a movie I was hunting for. Love stated grace. One of my fair, I think it's up there with good fellas. Paul told me I was crazy, let's not get crazy. Let's not get crazy. I think it's up there with good thoughts. I think it's near there.

It's up there. It's near. What's the difference between up there and near? Near is, it's like below, up there is like, it's up there, right next to it. It's almost there. I would say it's near. It's near.

I would say near. I'll take that. Yeah, go ahead. But deep discount has it because YouTube, yeah, YouTube is shutting down all those uploads, not full movies. So. Yeah, but now you know what your things are,

you know what the TV shows you like. You can search for it forever or just go and get it off at deepdiscount.com. It's hardly ever there. Or if sometimes it's edited, or sometimes you have to, like on YouTube, you have to watch six parts of it, which is a noise the hell out of me.

I just like the name. And no commercial. Deep discount. Deep discount. You get a discount. Deep. Deep. All right get a discount deep deep. Deep. All right, it's my sponsor.

Let's not make it point out. So here's what you need to do. All right, bye. Buy it. Buy yourself. I have deep discount. Top top. Yo, you're gay bed.

Bad. This way you'll always have it when you want to watch it. No more wasting time. It's it. Commercial free. You own it. You're favorites to watch whenever you want. Right now, go to deepdiscount.com, or just click the logo on my homepage,

riotcast.com slash Robert Kelly. And buy stuff this way, you know, that's the way they know I sent you. If you use that code, they know that I sent you. So go to my page on riotcast and click that link and buy some stuff from deepdiscount.com. You're gonna save money, you're gonna save all kinds of time, and even more they get a blue ray sale going on right now, the more you buy, the more you'll save.

I'm talking classics like Heller Highwater, Die Hard, classics, Die Hard movies, and they also have TV shows like South Park too. So many more. Go there right now, check out all the stuff. TV shows, movies, blue rays, video games, everything at deepdiscount.com. They have new releases too. Like, what is this?

Why is this double? What is that down there? I hate when the fuck. Do they have it twisted? Do they have a camera on me? Do they have a camera on me? What? What does the bottom say?

Oh, if you want to watch Jigsaw, the game continues is out now. Is it really? Nice. On DeepDiscount? Yeah. That's crazy. Look at the Dennis Leary Roses up there.

Maybe I'll get that for Jim Cervical. Jim, he doesn't want to see that. So, did any producer? Yeah. He did. Yeah, he's like, I want to produce that. We want some of you produced. So deepdiscount.com, go to ryecast.com slash Robert Kelly, con volotea la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca, espectacularismos, monumentos rincones de película y un sincín de aventuras te esperan. ¡Fliparás! Vuelades de madrida murcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros.

Volotea. Parifa sujetas a disponibilidad, consulta las condiciones en volotea.com. ¿Qué es la gente, la gente? ¿Qué es la gente? ¿Qué es la gente? ¿Qué es la gente? ¿Qué es la gente? ¿Qué es la gente? ¿Qué es la gente? ¡Qué es una gente muy buena para la gente! Sí. What if he just went in there just killed himself? Yeah, that'll be fucking great be good for your ratings. Yeah

Or if he's assembling his weapon to come in and kill all my god. It's somebody I blocked No, I don't know what here is on that screen. Ah, alright anyways, there we go We have a couple more ads later. We'll do it. But yeah, um comedy the comedy seller We were talking about that is um here. Oh, she sent me something else too, don't say. Ooh. You're from the stage, wow dude, this club is gonna be nuts. And the way they're gonna try to book it,

the one, like we said, what Vegas does is they book an opener, a meddler, and an immediate headliner, you know, cause whatever. They're gonna try to send three or four of us out there a week, give us some good money, right? And have the best show in Vegas hands down. Like imagine you three or you four doing a show in Vegas. Imagine you four and everybody's doing 20 minutes.

No, you can switch it up. Some of them go first, some go second, everybody's doing 20 minutes. And this is the one thing they're not allowing. In Vegas, at the end of every set, some guys holding up a, you know, a fucking hat or a scarf. All right, if you guys want to buy my stuff, because they're trying to recoup their money, that they're, oh, trying to make more money, so it makes it all right for them to be there

for fucking eight dollars, a fucking show. So they're trying to sell hats and shirts. Every single comic, the host, DVD, CD, the middle guy, DVD hat shirt, the headline, a shirt, bracelet, iPhone case. Bracelet? I'm just being exaggerating, but yes, they have... I've been nice bracelet. But it's cheesy. It's fucking cheesy. You make... So they're not going to allow that? No merch. No merch. They. You're making it. So they're not gonna have merch? No merch, no merch.

They're gonna have merch, but they're gonna have their own fucking store. So after the show, they have a replica of the fucking bar downstairs at the cellar, and they're gonna have a certain section that you guys, if you have stuff, you can go over there. They're gonna send everybody over there

after the show to do a meet and greet, and you can sell your shit. Whatever you want. And the casino only takes 30%. They don't take anything. Not taking shit. All right, wow. It's gonna be good then.

It's gonna be great, but here's, look, it's gonna be a fun time. Are you gonna make a million bucks out there? You're gonna do Tuesday, you're gonna do Tuesday through Sunday or come on Monday. And, you know, and when I said it's fluid, if that doesn't work, then they'll go to the headline blah, blah, blah. But they're gonna use LA comics.

Uh-oh, they're gonna start using a bunch of LA comics. Got, you know, guys that we know are funny, that, you know, don't get to play Vegas. Right. You know, but they're gonna pay good money. They're gonna actually, instead of giving you $50 a show, they're gonna give people, you know, what you should get. Right. So you gonna actually instead of giving you $50 a show They're gonna give people you know what you should get right so you can walk away with a thousand dollars a show No, not you what you kidding me. What?

I don't know I was gonna Yeah, you're right have it to be a good hang too because it'll be all of us out well There's a lot of foundation there Mike the funnest thing about it I do it a show like that is getting a hang with a bunch of people. Well, there's no temptation for you to hang out with Mike. No, there's a lot of temptation in Vegas and Mike knows that I'm trying to choose a different path now. What's the path? He's Christian.

Yeah, more towards the next morning. Are you turning into a Christian? I'm not, I'm not. No, I'm not. He went to Catholic school. What's up with your arm? I just have Catholic tattoos all over my body because I feel like we're in the midst of a new crusade.

It's a... Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. over my body because right I feel like we're in the midst of a new crusade I've catholic I've catholic queens tattoos all over my body. I have a big cross on my back that's I see it Picture I don't want to pull my shirt off Why, you don't pull it off. He doesn't. He's got a big cross with Jesus just hanging off. Just stand over there and show me the back.

I've got a virgin Mary. Let me see it. He is queen. I'm gonna see this. Trash. That's it. Let me see it. Look at this.

I'll pop up. I'll pop up. He is fucking. He is fucking. Yeah, I'm fucking crazy. He's gonna keep going, keep going, stand up Mike. Yeah, look at that. He's good will hunting of his name Oh, here we go one two three

Big ass cross y'all honest is that freak you out when you're behind him? Does that like ever have it you ever have a problem? That's where I aim right there. That's actually All right sit down. That's nice tattoo. Yeah, I mean you know, I mean, I don't know why you would get it there Well, I just went teacher on a okay sit down Everybody you have to like living in the neighbor like you have to get it from a you guys have to walk around shirtless at one point Yeah, like once he had taken shirt up. Yeah, you got to have five Catholic crosses. Yeah, and one our father on your up a torso I father got that on his gravestone So I like it That Oh, that's, that's where he copied it off of.

He posted a pic on Instagram, was like, that's my next tattoo. God rest his soul. God rest his soul. Dyl, can you put my friends' fathers grave on my back? We're about to do a podcast together. I want to show solidarity. Yeah.

Dude, why would you, I have fucking, that my tattoos are like epically they're gross Holy don't do roast I think has the To roast off his body. Yeah, what is it? It's just me. I like is I mean that like ladder tattoo, right? Did he have that he's got a bad tattoo? Yeah, bad tattoo You know you have to cover up the tattoo because you take such a pounding for it Yeah, you don't have to go up the tattoo because you take such a pounding for it. You literally have to go get another tattoo. That's when you go, fuck it, fuck it.

And we're so bad, Joe, it was like, hey, can you make this racist? It looks like something. His tattoo's match him though. I mean, it matches. Well, it's not gonna someday. No, I'm like just a queen. It's like today, I saw Greg popovich walking. I swear to guys so

Great his name ever yeah Greg pop it. I was like and I was like yo, what's up coach? Go spurs and he just started laughing at me He didn't even say he just started laughing because he's like what is this fucking moo like when we saw Chris Mullin Yeah, and I just gave him a pound of the whole day. I was like Brooklyn all day Yeah, just started laughing at pops gonna be giving an interview later He's like I love this city man. I was walking down McDougal and this garbage man said what's up, man. You must have been like a local, he was in local three.

Yeah, local three. Yeah. I love the Italian, you know what I'm saying? Yannis says that I should be like, I should be dead right in the back of a garbage truck. Why should be a garbage man? He should be hanging off the back of a garbage truck. I don't think that, but somehow,

because my friends are all cops firemen. I think you should be like at a YMCA picking kids up or something like that. Is that like a pedophile? No, no, no. I think you should be like, you're doing some local stuff. Oh yeah, like a coach.

Yeah, like a coach. You should have a gray shirt like champion shorts on. Yeah, some backpack going to some like YMCA. And then after that, you're gonna go to an A&Me meeting and set it up, you're not part of it, you just help them set up. Yeah, and then you go after that, you're gonna go home for a little bit,

do some homework, because you're back at community college, because you wanna get your associates and then everything. In physical education. Yeah, yeah, I know. I got a story, and it happened to me too, when I went to school in DC, and I, you know, I'm,

his neighborhoods like New York, New York York new like working class in New York So we were in Maryland together, and we went to this restaurant and they were these two girls And they were like as waspy as you can be like wasp Connecticut or Maryland kind of yeah, and they were looking at us like we were garbage like like we were garbage. Just garbage people. And it was like, was that your first experience of realizing that those wasps look at us?

Yeah. It was my first time ever seeing, like being in front of someone. Because he's a handsome kid. But I wouldn't even look at him. I made the girl nauseous. Just by the way, I was talking. She stopped slowly, stopped eating her food. I was like, they couldn't believe that they let us in.

Yeah. I had to sweat your own when he came to eat. Yeah. He walks in. I had a Yankee sweatshirt on my hair. What's fucking wild? I don't like a big coat. Is that what is that where the Bay Ridge boys came out of? No, we already do a Bay Ridge. We're already doing it. We should do this for a fucking living. Now Bay Ridge boys came from just walking around Bay Ridge. Yeah. Yeah, we both live there We both live in Bayridge. This is Bayridge now if people don't know what Bayridge boys are I don't know who you are because you crazy Bayridge boys go to YouTube type in Bayridge boys one two and three

They're writing for now It is I'm telling you it is when I first saw it, I'm like, what are these fucking knuckleheads doing? I was like, oh shit, I'm gonna, I'm gonna have to watch another stupid webisode with my friends and then go, yeah, no, it was good dude. When I'm just like, you fucking stink. And then, don't talk about Mike's talk show with kids like that.

I, first of all, I'm gonna say this. I love that show. I don't know what happened to it. I mean, I know what happened to it. Mike was involved in it. I ran and said, fuck it. Look up in the eyes and tell him you love it. I swear to God, Mike, and I told you this to your face.

Yeah. I thought it was hilarious. Thank you. You're a person out. He's perfect for it. Just dead, dry-panned, you know, and let the kids be the fun. I let the kids be the fun. I let the kids be the fun.

Thank you, Bob. I let the kids Thank you, but I'm gonna take us a compliment That was funny, but I saw this great you are good on that me. Hey You're gonna be okay what it's gonna pop for you. I'd say when I cracked up at this first episode of Bayridge boys when fucking Chris you take. You ever get punched in the face? I want to punch you in the face. Because I told you, I grew up with these f**king assholes. And Boston, same f**king guys was like, dude, I want to punch you right in your f**king but it's so sincere.

It wasn't like, it was like you loved you. It was almost like, dude, you need, I'm going to do this for you. Yeah. If I want to hit you so bad need, I'm gonna do this for you. Yeah. If I want to hit you so bad, it's fucking almost lustful. You know what I mean? Like, you said it like, oh, I just suck, just suck my dick.

Let me put my dick in your mouth. I knew kids like that, like, dude, I'm gonna fucking smash your skull. Yeah. Right? And when you said that line, and then you tagged him in the nuts, and then Shawneeo comes in,

and I was like, I laughed when he came out of the car. God, the seat was like, the fact that he is a plane closed, that really, he's not chasing anybody. No, no, no. But he rolls on, he's like, hey, what's going on? He fucking taps him in the nuts.

Fucking hilarious. I love it. I tell you, I's like, hey, what's going on? He fucking taps him in the nuts. Fucking hilarious. I love it. I tell you, I go one, three, two, as my favorites. Two was good. I got a little confused, but I watched you the second time and the third time, I was like, all right, it made more sense to me. The first one I just...

That one's the smartest one, that's for the smart people. They gel it up. Who wrote that one, yeah, honest? That was a joke. Of course, yeah. That was a leadest, yeah, yeah. That was a leader's, Janice. Why relate to anybody? Why dance with Brock for the first fight?

I'm like, I'm like, hey, how about we just tap people in the balls and you're like, yeah, but we need to send it, Massachusetts. We need to send it. Yeah. Definitely a fucking message trying to be forced on our throats on that one. No, no, no, no, we like cock.

It's funny, because everyone, a lot of people comment like that, they go like three, two, a lot of people, two they love, a lot of people comment like that they go like three two a lot of people It's two they love a lot of people. Well, that's when you know you got something Yeah, and my eyes when people start you know look they do with albums. They do a TV shows I love this episode in that episode in this episode When they don't even when they just go hey man. I was funny and move on Yeah, yeah, there's a lot of interaction on the comments and stuff on Facebook is where most of the views come from.

And I think too, and I'll be honest, in this where we're at right now, you need something like this. These guys need, these fucking off, need to exist and say, fuck the last episode, when you said muzzies referring to Muslims, I was saw out of my chair. There you go. Ask the muzz, the muzzies. Then you showed up at fucking what's his name's house. The mesh battalions. The mesh battalions are fucking in here. He's not in the muzzles. It's so perfect. Yeah. Because you know

you guys are harmless. You're not fucking assholes. Yeah, but you show up Hey, dude, you know, what do you think about this? And he answered the greatest part is that he knows you Fox Yeah, and we grew up together and it doesn't even he knows you and he answers the question Yeah, doesn't even question that he's not Muslim like yeah, he's told us 20 times He's not just don't care Well the characters grew up together. So that and Bayridge is very much like that. It has a huge Middle Eastern pop. Yeah. The fun part about this is me and Chris like the other day I was walking on the street and this

cop just pulls over and he's like, yo, what's up, Cuzzy? He's fucking love and fire. Yeah. Of course, because it relates to the most guys in New York City or around Even not just New York Boston. Yeah, you have these fucking two dudes these guys. That's why we fell in love with fucking Tony Monero, baby. Yeah, why when he's walking down the street and he goes in the paint store is that can I get to more rough? Can I get a raise? Yeah, You were like, I know this fucking guy. We just want like, mask it like just being like men because I feel like all the funny men now on TV, they make them so feminine and they take all that,

you know, because you don't want to like cross the line. But we were just like, let's just be funny. We're not fucking racist, we're not misogynistic, we're just guys. So we're gonna do guy shit. Like there's a thing that like being masculine is like aggressive. It's like seen as a threat. It's a very, but here's the thing.

Let's be honest about that. It's in the, I mean, if you take the general population, even of America, it's a very small percentage, just those percentage of people who think that happen to be in power. Yes. That's what it is. That's what it is.

Most women don't wanna date that guy. Right. Right? No. Gabby? I'm asking her a woman. Oh, sorry. Wait, he told you so.

I'm transitioning. What is that? That's the next episode. It's gonna get real auto-view. Christyx, Christyx, Moreesa is my real personality. Yeah. I think this is the ultimate character. That's what I believe in my heart. He thinks I'm a psycho. He's a little pregnant. I. This is a character. I think this is the ultimate character. That's what I believe in my heart.

He thinks I'm a psycho. He's a little pregnant. I think this is his character. If Janus was really putt a regan, he'd be in the Bronx. Yeah, that's why he refuses to ever walk around the lower he's siren me because I know he's gonna run into his old friends.

Yeah. Never like my reason. He's like, no, no, no. It's Janus. He won't walk around the lower he's siren me. He fucking hates Greek food. Oh, yeah, he, no. It's the only. He won't walk around the lower your side when they, he fucking hates Greek food. Oh, yeah, he's just, oh, fucking hates.

Yeah, he's got bottles. He puts his own on everything. All right, little sprinkles of it, a double. He's fucking sneaking plantains and he's fucking, he's got him in his pocket right now. I thought you'd pull out a fucking plantain right now. Fucking empanana. Ah, how funny would that,

ha ha ha ha. Ah, no, no no no no is Jan. Is Jan? No. No you suck sick on Avenue D. That's not that not me. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha.

Yo when I was I was saying that I was saying it was so I was going on a rant in front of his fiance the other day like this is his and then you could see like the fear in her eyes like I did you guys get to a fight when I left know she was cool about it because I thought she was gonna start grilling you with some questions like what is Chris talking about I got worried about you after that why because when you're like I'm gonna fucking burn a place down I was like yeah it's got hidden right because you know what hidden yeah Chris hidden no that's like saying Mike has hidden rage no but I'm Chris is very like freewheeling I don don't see a answer to Rage-in. I'm passive and I push stuff down

and I'm like, you know what that doesn't bother me? Maybe it does bother me and Janice knows that and then he'll push me a little bit. Just give me little pokes. He'll be like, this should bother you, right? And he gets in my head and I told him one day, it's gonna, I'm gonna fuck, he's gonna push me and I'm gonna go off the edge

and do what? Commit a hate crime. I'm just gonna, they're all so I said it. I'll be the one to stab you the bad guy, hate crime. Kill a couple of Chinese kids. Y'all just told me to do it. And then he won't, he'll just back off. He just walks in until Mauricia comes out.

Okay, it's me. It's me. Oh, Chrissy. No, but can I say something about Y'all? And he has a way of really cutting to the truth. Yeah. I don't know if he's trying to like push you over the edge, I don't think so. I don't know if he's trying to push you over the edge.

I don't think so. I don't know what's in his heart. He's just unstable right now. He really just cuts to the truth and sometimes it shakes you heart a little bit. What do you mean? He'll be talking to you about something that's like a personal thing

that just everybody goes through, like a relationship or whatever. And he'll just say some shit that just cuts right to the core of it. And you'll be like, fuck, I never thought of it that way. And it'll affect you. You'll walk away from it, and it'll take a little bit of time. And you'll be like, fuck, I never thought of it that way. You know, but it'll affect you. You'll walk away from it, it'll take a little bit of time and you'll be like, I didn't really think of it that way, but it'll affect you emotionally. So I know what it's like.

So the thing is what the honest is, like, I swear to God, it's helped me so much in the last like six months, like going through stuff, talking to me about like ego and thought process and it's so like laid out and simple and so educated. And then I'll, I'll like go home and be like, I feel like a better man, because he honest. And then I'll go on Instagram and he'll be like, go get my tickets to Miami. Hey!

And I'm like, do I listen to this for the head? I don't have any evidence. You know? I don't have, I've never taken advice from me honest. No. And then I question him, like, should I be taking advice from him? No, you should.

Look what he's doing. Chris, no, you should. He's got two other ones. Yeah. He's got two people he gives advice to. Yeah, fuck it, isn't it? Yeah, it's a progukie. You have to just get the wife here.

Yeah, you get that guy. You get that guy, you get Yannis. Can you get fucking liberal Yannis? Oh my god, yeah. There's a few Yannis. There's a few that fucking liberal a few, there's a few, I'm talking liberal, cookie honest. I don't know what I gotta do.

We can say that's a new word for Faggot to learn. That's how guys are getting away with your, your a cookie or a cup. Fuck this guy, cookie charms up here. There's a fucking few listeners on this podcast who just cut right to it. They're like, I didn't get through this episode because of Janice.

Really? Yeah. There were some harsh comments. Yannis. Really? Yeah. There were some harsh comments. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, last week. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Wow, listen man, here's a deal. They think I'm like a liberal cuck. I think you're cuckled very thin. Are you a liberal cuck? I am. No. On certain issues, but it depends on the issue.

You know, they just, they, you know, I think I know. In fact, you said issue. You know what I'll say to Yannis? They don't like me because I'm well thought out. You're well thought out and to be end to Mike's point, you, everything you say is in fact, the truth. Yeah. Pretty.

It is the truth. Like you're saying. Wait a minute. That's too. You're saying what's real about it. Wait a second. Relax. Yeah.

No, it's not. Well, what is he? Fucking what is what is it? What is it? Islam. Yeah. Everything you know, that's, that's called being perfect. Yeah. That's the around. What he thinks he is. Yeah. Well, you're saying that he is being perfect. Yeah, that's the around.

That's what he thinks he is. You're saying that's what he is. Why would he think that if he has fucking cucks like you say anything? I'm not a fucking cock. How great a word is. I'm not a cock, though. That's a good, good. It's my new cock a lot.

I say cock constantly, fucking cock. I love the cheese. It's a good word. Cuck-y cheese. Cuck-y cheese. Get down there, you cuck. Yeah. I don't want a coffee, must she just ask? Yes, please. I'm not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that.

You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that.

You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that.

You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. You're not gonna say that. I can't show that court's balls. I'm getting fucked up my lunches through the roof when you look at a court Medicates court actually can let me say something court actually is those transcendental right I do yeah I do he's been meditating no joke twice a day For years a little over 10 you've never missed a day. Oh, I missed a day here It's not not both times, but I meditate in the morning every day no matter what. So you wake up, how does it work? You wake up and then meditate. Wake up, brush my teeth, put a little watermys

and meditate for half an hour. Half an hour every day. And then, when do you meditate again? Usually around 5.30 in the afternoon. Another meditation. Now explain to you what you do when you meditate. You just sit there and like you get comfortable. You gotta have your back supported.

People think you sit in the middle of a room and like sit up, there's no fucking way to relax like that. So you sit back and you just relax, you close your eyes, you have a mantra and you do your mantra, it's like, now that's the thing that bugs me is because it costs around,

I'll just explain this to you, it costs around $1,500 to $2,000 to go to Transcendental Medicaid. And then they give you a mantra. Yeah. So I call Colin Quinn, who's one of my best friends, talked to him every day. I says, hey, can you loan, can I have your mantra?

Can I get it? Cause so I can save myself to grant. Right. And he's like, no. Yeah. You can't give your mantra away. No. Sure.

What the fuck? Well, for it, isn't that something specific to you? Your mantra. It is a little bit, it is a little bit specific to you, but also, but also the mantras did have to come up with. But here's the other thing. The other thing, I'm not telling you. Right. Because it's just my thing. What is it rhyme with?

Is it one word or two words? It rhymes with cuck. No, but the mantra is an ancient word, right? Yours is an ancient word. So is mine. You know what a mantra is? You have one right? Yours is an ancient word. So is mine. You know what a mantra is? You have not. I did the transcendental meditation.

All mantra is a mind vehicle, is what they call it. So it's actually a word, it means nothing. It basically has no mind. It's basically a sound. Can you give me a word that would just give me a word? Shream. Shream. Yeah, that's a very common like,

that's my bunch of montrae sure now it is a swear to god stream you just find out what do I do huh that's your mantra for you should get a change at the cussie yeah haha haha I'm trying to promote your change at the

cuck cuck cuck cuck cuck oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana oh yana so you know uh... uh... uh... uh... people turning up but i think the whole reason the whole reason they do that thing about about doing the money to do it to do a whole thing is you go through a learning process of

how to meditate, what it is to meditate and the process of doing it. And the mantra is included part of it. So just to tell someone to go sit down because there's a lot involved in it, like when you meditate, especially when you begin to meditate, your fucking mind's going a thousand miles an hour, you're thinking of all kinds of shit. And they teach you let a let a thought come in and not try to push a thought out. Yeah. Just and like and let it kind of flow. My friend, you went to the classes. I did the classes and it's like they said like nothing that you do is wrong. If you see their closure eyes and say your mantra. Yeah. Well, you're not doing it. You're giving away your mantra to your

friend who wants to save fucking to grand. I guess that's the part that's wrong. But what you're saying is you still got to go. I, there's things that you learn there. Here's the problem. I went, my friend's a yogi down the street on 13th street. He's a legitimate yogi. Okay, so I went to his club. I went, he said, come see me. I went down.

We did a two hour session yoga and trans-indemocratic meditation. Sick. And at the end of it, I was like, oh my God, he goes, you wanna come up stairs, he lives there. And I go up to his room and I met the yogi who looks like a yogi, right? And he's showing me all the stuff

and he goes, all the male yogis live on this floor. And I'm like, oh, that's great. And this is the yogi, this is the guy, oh, hi, how are you, nice to meet you? And he goes, the women yogi are on the floor below us. There's a couple ladies down there. One of them's a fucking cunt. And then I was like, what?

What? Like, what? Even you? Even you? How am I supposed to go? But at least he said it in a calm voice. Yeah, he's like, she's a fucking cunt. No, he didn't go she's a fucking cunt.

He literally goes, she's a, one of them's a fucking cunt. I was like, we just did two hours. And even you, it doesn't work. Because even you, you're a yogi, you live with yogis, and one of the yogis is a cunt. So, how am I, why do I, fuck it, I'm all right. All right, all men, the best thing about meditation, the greatest thing it does is it relieves stress.

And it actually reverses the aging process in someone. Because stress is what kills you. Stress is like, stress ages you, stress causes sickness, illness, cancers, it causes everything. And when you meditate, what happens is your mind actually goes to sleep when you're wide awake. So it actually goes to sleep for a period of time and your body is not used to that when you're awake

this conversation but what actually but what actually is my mantra that's what we do on the cast it's a new york that's okay i can handle it where you from i live in Los Angeles okay i would mean we mean cast. It's a New York thing. That's okay. I can handle it. Where are you from? I live in Los Angeles. Okay.

We mean, but it's a fiction here. That's okay. You can go fuck yourself. I love you too. No, President, it's just, it's an act of a lie. You can't do that. You're really doing it. Go fuck yourself.

Go fuck yourself. I'm not that in a loving way. You know? But I do think, I think you would gain from it. I think it's, I think anybody, I think anybody. I think anybody who does it it's a great fucking Stress, here's the problem. My class it said to 20 minutes a day twice a day. You're doing 30 Yeah, I've been doing it over 10 years They said if you do any more you it's got to be 20 on the dot. No, that's bullshit

Do 30 you're telling me to do 30? No, how long you been doing it? Three months. Yeah wait wait about a year and a half. Chris, but I miss it. I missed days left and right. There's times I don't know. He's got a daughter. He's got a book on the table. What happened to your hairline?

What are you talking about? On the side of that right there, it goes in like a Z. Oh yeah, because I got a, I got a part. Don't worry, that's part of my hair. They shaved that in? Yeah. So when you go to the barber, you say, but why is for the, I asked for the alt, right?

But why did it? go to the barber you say I asked for the I asked for the alt right, but why did Turn to the turn that let me see. What is that little thing coming out? Why do you look like a superhero? It's like it's like a long way like a leading man facing best friend body listen no turn to the right It goes up out and then back his tiki torch burn that off and then back in. Oh, his tiki torch burned that off. Yeah, sorry. No, it's my symbol. But what is the symbol?

I don't understand. What do you mean, bro? Why do you just... White powers is the symbol. I know. They can never be great again. That's the symbol. It's really unbelievable.

I mean, you want to talk about fucking some crazy shit about masculinity and what's happening. I mean, this is ZZ's I'm sorry, I'm finally I'm glad that women Finally saying not get the fuck off. Yeah, they really are some of them some of them Yeah, but yeah, but who at least look it. I still think Louis is in the same category Yeah, I think what he did is the same shit. Yeah, he didn't even touch anyone No, touch anybody asked for he asked he I can say, and he didn't do anything. You know, and then they came out and they fucking took it all

away. But Aziz, it was so fucking, when I saw him, I was like, are you kidding me? You see, five, six, like a buck, 20 wet. I saw the, I saw the, and the second part. I heard that, I heard last night someone was talking and saying that they had been actually together before the incident that she's talking about.

Here's where we're at. A girl can literally go through, write a date down, a sexual encounter and say, I felt uncomfortable and they can literally go after you and try to take everything away and put you, try to put you, they tried to. He was almost going to fall into the sexual assailant assault, Weinstein category. And the slap in the face, the women were actually assaulted. To slap in the face to women who were actually sexually assaulted.

She was not sexually assaulted. So this is a bad date. This is a bad date. Actually he got a blowjob. It was a pretty good date. You know, I'm, you know, I mean, it was a blow. Like three days. According to what was written, it's a bad, it was true. It was just, it was just not a good, okay, but it, but here's the thing is, is she blow him and she, she let him eat her out. Right. So the whole time you get eaten out, you weren't fucking loving it. Yeah, you weren't, you weren't, you weren't you were getting pleasure. Yeah. Yeah. And then you stop. I don't know how good

he is at it, but it was something. Come on. I know the commas sutra, because I'll throw candy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'll sleep on the Indians. I'm sure that was a move that he learned from his great great. It's been passed down from generation to fish. Oh, that should. Yeah. Oh, what's that? See, that's the only part of the Commissory secret. That's a Racial question. I'd like to take that Excuse me. I don't know anything about anything, but I will take the wrestling questions. This joke is something to make here Holy fish hooked her face or no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no Well, yeah, you stick in there like a salmon. It's gagging. It's like, you know, put it, you put the thing in the mouth and you make the girl gag a little.

But, but, but, but, I mean, she, so she what, she allowed that to happen and just didn't say. I don't think she liked it. But she didn't tell him that. No, nonverbal. It was all nonverbal. She said you did not pick up on the nonverbals, which is, well, I picked up on the verbals.

Yes, yes, he, my pussy, I mean, I picked up on the verbals. Yes, yes, see my pussy. I mean, I picked up on the physical, you know. What is a nonverbal node? Nonverbal? I don't know. Gabby, what is a nonverbal? Like body language. Like what?

I mean, because you've been in situations with guys where you have to let them know. I'm not into this without saying no. Like, I'm not, how do you do this? I think that's tricky. I don't really. What is a nonverbal? You know, why not? Because if I'm not into it, I would just say I'm not into it. I want to be like, like that's a normal verbal.

What's a nonverbal? What's a nonverbal? Tensing up as a nonverbal. Yeah. Okay, that makes sense. Right. You know, where you look girls are. I don't, you know, maybe, you know, really?

But some, but then you come back with, I know how to make you relax. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Guys, guys, guys, no, I don't know. I'm scared. Have you guys ever started a finger? Are you really scared? What? It's like, no, I'm kidding, but I mean, I'm being facetious, but it is kind of like, yeah, I mean, you know, I'm scared to say something. You don't know. You don't know in this climate. Yeah, this is what's weird to me is that, you know, women were, you know, forced, you

know, intimidated not to speak out or say anything for so long. And now they are. Right. But the far left of the feminists, these really far left feminists are scaring women into not speaking up about something like this. Where it's like, you know what, this is wrong. You're taking a cause and using it for your own fucking weirdness.

And when all these women, like, Caitlin, what's her name? John, no, Caitlin, this woman, I forget her name, Caitlin, something, Irish last name, she stood up. It says, this woman, I forget her name, Caitlyn, something, Irish last name. She stood up and says, this is wrong. He did nothing wrong. And she got attacked. She got attacked by feminists and left wing people.

And this is a woman. This is a woman that believes in women's rights. This is a woman that is for me too and times up and all that. And she said, you know what, I'm standing up and she's getting attacked for it. And she put a thing on a Twitter today, I think flanagan, something flanagan. Caitlin Flanagan, I believe her name is,

if someone, I don't know if anybody knows, but anyways, she wrote a thing, if you're naked with a man, he's probably gonna wanna have sex with you. Did you see that? She goes, I believe this is true. If you're with a man and you're naked, he's probably gonna wanna have sex with you. Yeah. She goes, I believe this is true. If you're with a man and you're naked, he's probably gonna wanna have sex with you. Yeah.

And yeah, so don't get fucking naked. I think it was maybe a little jarring for the girl that he acts the way he acts. Cuck, cuck, he acts the way he acts. Cuck, cuck, cuck. And then behind closed doors. Cuck, cuck, cuck, cuck, cuck. Did you see, C, uncle, do!

Did you see, did you see Chappelle special where he talked about sexual harassment? Can you not bring up better comments? Yeah, so that was very talkative. No, no, but I mean, for any specials you've heard one of our half hours or late nights. Yeah. But did you, did you happen to see that? So he talked about sexual, and I thought the greatest thing he said said because it wasn't even comedy. He was actually just speaking about it Was he said nothing's gonna change until some of you women get people on your side that maybe aren't the best allies

Yeah, so it's people that that doesn't actually commit sexual harassment But you don't maybe necessarily agree with right so I think that's the only way anything's ever because right now We're gonna have all these people, these girls that just randomly say, I had a bad date, and then it's now it's sexual harassment, bullshit. You know, you had a bad fucking date. Right, it was a bad date.

And it's like, and now many times somebody speaks up about it, then they're fucked up. It's on the, it's right here. What's your name? What's your name? Kate one Flanagan. Yeah, it's on the Atlantic. She actually, but here's this.

She came up against this and said, you know, we have to stop doing this. It's a really good article. You should check it out. Not that I'm a fucking genius. I love saying the word article, but, but, yeah, it was, it was refreshing because I know girls that are afraid to say anything, right, Louis or anybody, because it's just not worth it to them, because if they do, they're going to get attacked. They're going to get attacked, but they might, in this business, it will affect them.

It will affect us. I agree that. This podcast, even having this conversation, we're supposed to not even talk about it. But I think we're all pro women here. We're all against people. People assault like so. We all are. Can I just say something?

I don't know anything but powerful strong women. My whole life. I've never met a weak woman. I've never met one. I don't know what that is. My wife, my grandmother, my mother. All the women I've met in comedy in acting. They're all pretty fucking crazy strong women

to do what we do. You have to be a really tough human being to deal with the rejection we deal with. It's true. And it's not like men doesn't, we get rejected just as much. I know it's a male dominated, it's changing. It's all changing.

It's all becoming, we're evolving rapidly. You know, we're not what we were 10, 20, 30 years ago, 50 years, I believe that, we have to acknowledge that at some point, that we are doing it. And, you know, but I understand that, you know, this shit has to happen, but it always goes over and then this fucking girl tried to, the damage she could have done to this guy. She did, she already did. I mean, his mom's saying that,

she knows, his mom knows he fish hooks girls. Well, there's a huge, there's a huge danger in his mouth. He's like, that's a family secret. Yeah. The father of father son. The father of fish hook me, and that's how he got me. I was walking down the street.

Why you tell secrets? I have not seen my family in 45 years. Since I was fish hook for the first time. I mean it clearly wasn't as sexual as so. I mean clearly, basically the story was not as sexual as so. And based on her account of the story. That's what I'm saying. Right.

Based on her account. It just clearly wasn't. But here's the thing that bugs me is that she gets to remain anonymous. That I've got a feeling that won't last long. That you get you. Someone's going to someone's going to finally like his some as he should say, here's a picture of this bitch that's not going to accuse me. But from the darkness. Yeah. From the darkness from complete anonymity, you got to just go out there and try, because of some date that you felt bad about yourself, that you maybe let somebody, you went too far,

you fucked up and you probably felt shitty about you at the end of it, which I've had those, where you're like, oh fuck, I didn't want to do that, I didn't want to go there, and I fucking, I'm a weak cock sucker and I let myself do this and shit, you know? But, you know, and she got from the complete darkness go and take this guy out after he wins a golden globe.

I mean, look, I don't care what you think about a Z's. There's some comics that were like, yes. Yeah. How long ago, that's bad. Even if you're not a fan, that's the the wrong way that's the wrong way to take anybody down No way you don't fucking do that, but how long ago to this alleged Year ago, right? Oh, yeah, so why fucking now right after golden globe Yeah, it's like she's well I tell you why she actually said why because he's wearing a pen

Yeah, she's wearing he was wearing the pen and a bugger She's he's wearing the pen and she was like, fuck him. Oh, so it was okay that he did it before he wore the pen. No, probably wasn't. She probably had it with her that she's looking to the lag out of that fucking car. She just probably thought the hypocrisy of it because he was so aggressive.

He what, I mean, the story is he is aggressive. He's aggressive in the story. Maybe she was taking a back that his persona and public is like this and then she got him in private and he was like, can I stuff my face in your mouth? Can I just say, Moshi Mike's in the house. Moshi Mike! Moshi Mike!

Moshi Mike! He flew in from Houston today. Did it really? Yeah, he flew in. I like your hair. Hey, put him down. Just stop standing there before you spill them all. Get one of these.

Yeah, put him down. Someone help the fuck, guys. He looks gonna pass out. There might be a slender in that cup right now. Which one's that my Hibiscus? They didn't have a Biscuit. What the fuck guy, he looks gonna pass out. There might be a slender in that cup right there. Which one's that, my Hibiscus? They didn't have a BISCUS. What the fuck? Oh my God.

Is this the honest? Is that the honest one? Is it that volleyball on it? Then it's the honest one. I mean, that's racism against Greeks. Much don't. You could be racist against other white people. That's fair game, man.

That's totally fair. All right, listen. Mushy, you gotta do something about your facial hair. You can't be the same consistency because it looks like you were in a hair helmet. Okay, you have to. All right, do something.

Ha ha ha. Hair helmet. Moshi Mike, thank you for the coffee, man. Thanks, Moshi Mike. Very good. Swet your hair. Moshi. Yeah,, it was fucking I'm glad to see that but I'm all I just wish that I wish I feel like it's reverse It's like you're complaining that women with a Silence right and now you're silencing people again by saying you cannot say anything about this

Everybody's afraid to say anything about anything because you will have your fucking career taken away. Yes, I know. And nobody wants, even if it's 100 people attacking you on Twitter, that 100 seems like thousands and millions and they fucking hate you. And all that's trying to do is to take you down and make you fucking to shame you.

How about a couple of years ago, it was like you can't, it was it sex shaming? What was that called? Fat shaming? No, with women, we, the sex. Slut shaming. Well, I have one of sucka dick and I wanna get my pussy eating, my asshole eating.

You can't, don't fucking call me a slut. Let me do what I want. Let me, why don't we just in that mode? Yep. And now we're in this mode. I know. What is, I don't understand that. I'm not being a fucking asshole. I'm not being

sarcastic or facetious. I don't understand that. What is that? They've created a society where things don't mean what they mean anymore. Well, socrates said, right? Not funny, funny. You know, if somebody's acting like a slut, they're not a slut. You know, it's just, it is what it is. There's they mean anymore. Well, socrates said right not funny. He's funny. You know, if somebody's acting like a slut, they're not a slut, you know, just it is what it is. There's no truth anymore. There's no truth anymore. So you can be a slut. But truth is negotiable. It's a negotiable. Yeah. Error where truth is negotiable. So guys can't be slutty. I don't know. We can be slut

shape. You can. But we can't be because if we're slut we're pigs whatever angry mob you're a part of that's what's truth is to those people like if if if my mob thinks different than your mob then to my mob the sky's red to yours it's blue it doesn't matter and this is from Chris who's actually in the mob yeah true salute actually in a salute of the banana crime family no dude I did I hosted the show on Netflix called the ultimate beast master. Fucking people tweeted me every single day. What is that telling me what a piece of shit I am? They called him like a racist. They call me racist, misogynistic, homoph...

Uh-uh. What is it? Homoph... It's a... Explain the show. What's it? It's like American Ninja Warrior. It's like American Ninja Warrior. Okay.

And I hosted the show with Tiki Barber. And first of all, number one, the fact that I'm just an American and look the way I look, people from all over the world, tweet to me, you fucking elitist, nationalist, I get tagged in alt-right groups, like it's nuts, me, it's crazy. I'm like, you do look like Hitler's perfect little child. We have one person, one person.

Yeah, exactly what he wanted. One person, tweet to me, I bet you've never met any, you've never even talked to anybody else other than a white person in your whole life. I'm like, I have a Puerto Rican kid. Like, you know, I don't tweet at anybody, I bet you've never met any, you've never even talked to anybody else other than a white person in your whole life. I'm like, I have a Puerto Rican kid. Like, you know, I don't tweet at anybody, I don't tweet back. I let them, I let them yell into the openness,

but it's like crazy, like why? Because it's, you know, one of the Italian girls, the Italian co-host, the Italian, because each different country, it's like I was the host for America, and then every, and then the Italian host is like this beautiful supermodel, and Italy beat the US in a head to head thing and she came into our booth and started kissing me like on the cheek and then yelling shit and Italian and I said to

Tiki, I was like, I hope Italy beats the US every single match because I just want to keep getting kisses from Bianca, tweeting me, I'm sexually harassed Bianca. Who said that? People on Twitter. Just tweeting me that I'm sexually harassed. We need, I really, I really, can I say something about this? Don't you think tweeting me that I'm sexually harassing me. I really crazy Think the Twitter. I mean the Twitter come on people sitting in there a little yeah We need to end it and each day and Twitter needs to go the fuck the way my space. Yeah, we need to fuck it

Well, it's the year of the cock. That's one of which we're trying to have yana tonight trying to fight against that the year of the Cuck we need to end Twitter. I fucking hate it. It's not even that. It's just like you cannot convict somebody on Twitter. But they, but they had, that's what they're doing. They're convicting somebody. But here's the reason why Twitter gave them the fucking power, that little check mark, that verification. These, none of these people have verified human beings. None of these people they can sign on, get kicked off,

say whatever the fuck they want, get kicked and sign on again. They should, everybody should be fucking verified. You should have to own what you say and what you do. And I should be able to see you too. Like you see me, you see him, you see him, okay, we're all on TV, and Mike someday we'll see you, right? Right?

Right. They, they, wow. Well, you could see me at the DCM prop. This, sorry, not for bugs. I You could see me at the DC improv this week For bugs You give a plug I just now she DC improv DC improv He's the breakthrough Saturday. It should be so much shows you can see me there. Let's go to the traffic Smooth transition smooth that was fucking good, I got it. Unfuckin' believable, I'm telling you, I want to start a new app, it's called Verified. I want to do a new app, Verified.

You have to be verified, we have to know you, how many kids you got, where you live, you fucking phone number, everything. Yep. And if you want to go on and be a celeb, if you wanna go on and be a nobody, that's fine. But we know who you are. And once you get booted, you get one shot and you're done. And you're off forever. Once you fucking attack somebody, you're gone.

Yep. But what if you attack somebody like, look at Ari, who's been banned now. Now he's banned forever. Yeah, you won't been banned now now they suspended now he's banned forever from yeah you won't get are you sure there's been forever whatever whatever yes you know they thirty days no they they did it should be banned no he didn't appeal and they told him that he was done for good what did he do he was he actually yelled at Burke christian's front but he said something to Burke christian as a joke that he would go

over and like you know attack his family And they they're both you know they tweeted at each other their friends. They know each other They're both comedians and Twitter said it was a you know a violation or whatever and so he's gone Well, are you there? Yeah, I'm here Are you are yeah? Shut up So talking over me. I just want to you, are you? Yeah. Shut up.

Stop talking over me. I just want to make sure that my phone is keep going. I'm a Greek deep voice. Yeah. Listen, did you get banned from, you're on the live from YKWD right now in the studio? Oh wow.

Yeah. Welcome to the big leagues. Well, I'm literally holding a phone up on speaker phone to a microphone. It's not that, it's not that advanced. The video is pretty amazing. What a cut. Oh yeah.

Holy r it would be a cut out of the gate. Listen, did you get banned for life? I would love to read this email. Where's that fucking plug? It's the most Jewish thing I've ever been a part of. Yes, I was just always face reading emails about. Can we call him? I've never used that before.

Oh God, this is when I'm in trouble. All right, God, yeah, read it. This one, you look at your producer. Can we use that phone that's plugged into the computer to call him? I don't, we've never used it. God, can we work this phone out uh... i got a rita i would love to hear this

uh... i'm i'm not a book of my appeal is hey i'm i'm i was joking i didn't say i didn't really mean i was gonna home and date but christmas family right and kill him but you did mean that but you did mean that i'm going to be at home for a puppy and what home cooking. So I was like I'm a professional comedian. I had a special on net, but the comedy says he's a professional comedian. He's had a special on showtime and he's charged so on Netflix.

To understand, exaggeration is one of the tools comedians use to find humor. That's what I was doing. Exaggerating. Please read the state, okay. Here's what they wrote. Hello. After investigating your appeal, we have determined that your account posted content

that was threatening and or promoting violence. In violation of the terms of service accordingly, your account has been suspended and will not be restored when did they go hell hitler that's crazy that's crazy crazy crazy living. It's fucking crazy

How many people did you have following you? 183,000 Jesus. That's a lot of people. Yeah, and he probably had a good percentage of fans who I have a hundred thousand people. I would say ten thousand of fans Yeah, the rest of them are bots But that I mean what are you gonna do? I mean are you gonna start over are you gonna get a new fucking profile pick? I can't even use my fucking name. It sounded like let me start over and let me have the fucking name Arrachaffir. I was like, no, that one's done.

That account's done. So I got a fucking star, a new one, but nobody can even, it's not even like, you want to know what the fucking thing is. You got the gas. Like one of those idiot fucking comic Arrachaffir. No, I'm not fucking Joel. I'm a girl you should fear. No, I'm not fucking Joe. Let's have a real comic. That was fucking good and in the flow. Wow.

You didn't even miss a beat. Yeah. Oh my Lord. I love it. I hope Joe's getting a bunch of tweets now. Oh, what I do to you. Are you? Yeah. And it mean I love you, but I love you.

I love I'm going to help my mom and I'll help my dad. I'm going to help my wife. Joe is like my wife when I'm in the middle of the room. Joe is like that. He'll sling on you and then you sling on him and he's like, what the fuck, man? Oh my god. Are you mad at me? I've had to apologize so many times to Joe list

because I'm so aggressive. I say we all fucking delete our Twitter accounts and solidarity for our issue. Let's all, let's all. Let's. We should all listen. This is what we should do. We should all you should rally people together. We should all pick a day like maybe three weeks from now,

a month from now, and we'll all delete our fucking accounts on the same day. Yeah, we can organize it on Facebook or my space. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I'm telling you, I think we should start a new social media called Verified, where everybody has to be verified. We have to know who you are, all your information, that's way when you take a thing, when you come here, you will be offended if you follow me. You might be, I might say shit that pisses you off, you when you hit follow on arey's account you agree that fuck you nut you can't do anything about it

but i don't know if that's what the reasons i got back right refused to get verified i always thought it would be very popular against my well i don't know if i can't the private and the fact public so it takes away the verify check because they wouldn't do this to a celebrity they don't do it to the regular they only do it to the regular people but i think they could even read the appeal and they read it to be on the bill they do it they do it to minus celebrities

still right i don't know if they did it to you i think they do just to choose yeah just use uh... that's what it is it's not an anti-jewish segment i agree

that's not the worst of it, but now it's worse so are you gonna start one? are you gonna start another one? are you gonna say fuck twitter? i don't know, i don't feel like fucking starting out and when i get my 10,000 followers it's such a fucking annoying at night, i just might not do it I don't know. It's so fucking awful. Why don't you just go to Facebook dude like all the old people?

Yeah. Look at 50 year olds of Iodia. What about Instagram? What about Instagram? I'm on my Instagram. I always appears on Instagram. So why don't we all just go just everybody follow you on Instagram and do it there Well, let's get everybody off Twitter. That's my fucking goal. We shut Twitter down Because it's a hunk of shit place and that's the place where all this fucking bullshit comes out That's where all these fucking Social justice warriors and all these fucking hunk of shit far left assholes and far right assholes fucking live and breathe on Twitter we should shut it down

everybody has you know who everybody is you can't just be an egg and fucking and sign on and sign off fuck them I like it but where would the president go to threaten nuclear war we won't go there anymore he won't be he won't be allowed he won't be allowed i will listen i'll fucking listen i will i will be part of deleting my twitter account if these other guys want to do it are you in if everyone's in i'm in what about you christie uh... yeah i'm in

i'm in why not you don't think people support you like this now i think that right to the right to say that you know why you are fucking right to right to uh... you know i'm gonna put you in a home of age of family that uh... i got an audition for blue blood on Thursday.

I don't know. I can do it. You're a blood. Is that an internal home event? Oh, yeah. It's true. Fuck home event. Yes.

Well, all right, dude. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Whatever you want me to do, I got you back. I'm there for you, Ari. Unlike Chrissy. I'm like Chrissy Dave. I'll do it. With all your power.

It's on your power. What do you want? Laps, Davos, the Cross the Face. OK, it's done. Next time I see that fucking minion, I'm going to slap him right in his face. Meaning nothing. OK.

All right, and then I'm going to suck his dick. Do you want to actually attack Bert for you? Can we do that? Yeah, use your imagination. Yeah. you want to say actually attack bird for you is that can we do that you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know you know youian you know you know funny that would be funny but you know be even funnier if bird christian contacted twitter was like look now he is already freaking me out uh... i think he thinks it's a joke but i want my cars and moms maybe are i'm

gonna home invade your family doesn't sound like a punchline yeah you gotta work on your fucking jokes. Maybe like he's like, I don't know, he's get a little weird. Yeah, especially with the exclamation points. Just to really, can you mother fuck, I'm going to invade your family. I'm going to drink your fucking baby's blood. I mean, anybody should have laughed when you read mom's mabily, but apparently that'll the city on red Twitter.

I'm a long maverick. You know what's big is? Let me get my fucking records back. He fucking got your records and your Twitter. Ah, shit, you're gonna have to have Bert tweet your records and your twitter Shit you're gonna have to have Bert tweet your shit your shows out so you can fill the seats What what seriously what if Bert writes a letter to Twitter does that with that do anything that help? Maybe Bert was like I don't know i put on my family and hiding uh...

delivered under aliases right now what is summer other is to be so let's just see maybe they read other tweets that you put out there and and i think that i have a that uh... uh... is red uh... band five times next to his thing uh... can't go to a sweater because it's not there anymore

all your twitter's not there so we can't go to it that's true but already made the point and he makes a good point when he when he appealed to twitter when he i was reading it on the screen he's he said the president can threaten nuclear war but i can't joke around with a friend i mean that's true it's fucking we as a weird criteria yeah yeah look at us in denmark i'll look at you uh... that's me and you in denmarked it looks like l good fit in your head

Just made it I met him on J date Well, we had a good time with Denmark the first time I saw you cock I'm not a person, anybody. Hi, buddy. Let me know what we can do. I'm going to be a foxwood and a toss at the wall. I'm going to be a foxwood. He gave foam plugs. He's reaching out. He doesn't have Twitter anymore. He just call in every time. Do you have one of the dates that you have? That was the thing. It wasn't early on in the beginning of February.

One of the dates. Alright, go to R.E. Shafir. Do you have a website? R.E. Shafir.com I'll go to R.E. Shafir.com. He's got plenty of shows coming up. He's one of the funniest guys right now walking the planet. One of my favorites. And he is Twitter-less. He's one of the funniest guys right now walking the planet. One of my favorites. And he is Twitter list. He is social media. Media has nothing. Well, here are Ronin. We're going to actually, he's,

yeah, he's all over the place. He's at the Mohican Suns was a January 26 mic. Boston on the 27th Providence Rhode Island, the 28th, already sold out. Phil, he's two things I don't hear that often. Actually, last weekend we sold out, 80 Cedar. No, I'm kidding. Philadelphia, what does that feel? Helium, first through the third Salt Lake City.

You got a lot of damage. Go to IrishFear.com. See him if he's coming to your town retweet it because he has no Twitter Help him out are you are you meeting up later? Are you going to that cigar bar later? Yeah, he's got a girl. I think I know Hopefully she doesn't want kids Right No one knows, he's got a girl. Hopefully he doesn't want kids. Right? Yeah.

For men, that's a good picture point. Oh yeah. Are you shooting blanks, did you know that? Are you shooting blanks, dude? Oh, well let me know, I got fucking a full cannon. No, no, he had it. No, I'm not interested, thank you. Oh, yeah, he doesn't want kids.

I just offered to fucking give him jizz. Yeah. You don't have to get mad at me, I just, I just offered to give you an just offered to fucking give him jizz. Yeah. You don't have to get mad at me. I was just, I was just off and I give you an ice cube tray full of my jizz. Fucking put it in a vagina or let it melt. That wasn't that. I, buddy, I'll talk to you later. I'll call you later.

I got it. Mike. Yeah, he got it this sec to me. Really? Yeah. That's why he's got so many racist fans. I think he did the right thing not make any more Jews This guy's alright. Sorry. I like this guy. I can tell Ray one of you doesn't make more

You did the right thing, Ari What a weird time we live in when when Twitter can't go to their own fucking thing. Realize it's a comic. I mean, he's not, he's, you know who are he? She's furious. And no, you know, bird is. And then in the fact that you can't, are we talking about the machine? Yeah. Well, that died.

Yeah, that really. You throw that out there. One's, one's going to miss. Yeah, that really. Yeah. You throw that out there once, once it's gonna miss. That one fucking really missed. Yeah. What is this? You didn't read that yet? No, once it. Oh, I put that up for you last night.

Yannis, this isn't an emergency briefing. If you're on the New York City area, please stay inside until this man is apprehended. He's off his anxiety medication and has said to have chewed his nails to the actual bone. Apparently, he can't move his right arm at all because he is exposed under nail, got infected and it has traveled up his bicep less arm.

What? His bicep no biceps. No biceps. Yeah, it's a weird body. Wow. That actually happened to him where he had an infection. He's a fucking wild

He don't like that like that. There is a good chance. He's wearing offensive weekend Serpent down What is that you want me to help you read it Bobby? I can't I don't like glasses Finelines basement. I know my glasses. He's fucking wild and hyena like you guys have phone. He's basement here. Yeah, yeah That's a boss. That's from Boston Yeah, he wears like fucking it there's a good chance he's wearing offensive weekend dad suburban dad filings basement been type generic nighties with high

Mickey Mouse socks and black teenager fulton wall models beige colored zipper pants or high mountain your shorts revealing blindingly brisk white pale thighs i repeat do not let him take a socks and shoes off his feet look like we can crush the heavy door by Russian mobsters over debt. It's startling for women and children. He talks like eat it from Archie bunker. It has an alarmingly wide 38 inch waist.

Christie must be made to dig his own hole and shot into it. Lock your doys and hide all your sweets and cookies. He'll invade your home and gourd himself on sugar until he looks like a rural American at a Chinese buffet. Caught in New York State, stay away from drug stores with blood pressure machines, good chances in there, checking his blood pressure, panicking, thinking he's having a stroke. If you come across this sociopath in a Dwayne Reed crying and texting manically, throw him a slice of pizza and a canolean step back and call authorities. He's off his cell.

Oh, boy. Now that's not as like a threat. Now why does Janus get to stay? Yeah. He doesn't. I'm kicking him off right now. Fucking beat it. You fucking dirty Greek.

Are you hiring? You know where to post your jobs to find the best candidates. Do you? Do you? Do you have to pee? Usually you have to pee at this point. I can. Yeah. You have to pee. What's, do you? Do you? Do you have to pee? You usually have to pee at this time. Right, yeah. You have to pee? It's my pressure, yeah.

What pressure? He's my pressure. You know the new Apple Watch coming out, the new one this year is gonna have a heart rate monitor and it will tell you when your blood pressure's going up and down. That's probably gonna make it more worth, like give a more cardiovascular.

Well like BFIT justice and Justice and Smoky in the Bandit, dude, Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Bufi Wow, nobody said nothing during that fucking briefing Fucking Yannis just went through wordy cocksucker. I like writing words Feel bad for fiancee had to read it twice. I know I like it. We didn't say anything Was probably funner he did want to me and that was a retaliation Wow, so long do you want me to read the one one about you honest hang on one second read it after this This I want you to talk about the challenge of finding this what I want ready When I'm hiring and I talked to Liz above this anybody who has a business You get a higher people and it's it's terrible finding the right talent Is important for great for great business for this show, finally the right people

to work on this show was crazy. It's nuts. I say nuts a lot. Nuts, nuts. But right now, Zip Recruiter, posted jobs to over 100 of the websites, web's leading job boards, which is one click. That's over 100 of the leading job boards, one click.

That's it. Then Zippercrutor's actively looks for the most qualified candidates and invites them to apply. Amazing. The 180% of the employees who post on Zippercrutor get a qualified candidate through the site in just one day. Just one day. Find out today why Zip Recruiters has been used by businesses of all sizes and industries

to find the most qualified job candidates with immediate results. And right now, my listeners, if you have a business, you should take advantage of this. My listeners right now can post on job recruiters for free. That's right. Free. F-R-E-E. Boom. Free. Just go to zippercuters.com slash what dude? That zippercuters.com slash what dude. One more time. Try it for free. Go to zippercuters.com slash what dude? Okay? It's unbelievable. If you have a business, use zippercuters.com right now for free.

Okay guys, we're gonna wrap this up. We got another one, do we have any more? Oh, it's good. I wanna thank all the, we have one in the studio, right here, premium member. Been making me nervous for the whole time. Premium member. The like Monica Sellocitne here

is gonna get stabbed in my back. He's, I'm, he, dude, he was, I can be nervous for the whole time. Premium member. The Monica Celicittin here is gonna get stabbed in my back. He's, I'm, he, dude, he was, I can, look, I always keep my eye on the people that come into the studios, and I always can tell, when they're not laughing, and they're just staring at the back of heads, that's when I get nervous. He's been laughing the whole, he's great. He's awesome.

Yeah, that's good. Yeah, I'm gonna down stairs, he's a good guy. Well, it's not like he carried away, we don't know. I'll, he's really, really drunk, yeah, okay downstairs. He's good guy. Well, it's like a car to way. We don't know Really really drunk Only three drinks that fucking noon Oh, I Wish I never did that The fuck did I just taste? It's like Turkish coffee. It's called Greek coffee.

That's the honestest mortal answer. It's a big contention between Greeks and Turks. Yeah, well they actually, I mean, the other ones who came up with modern science and mathematics, right? Damn right, man. No, Greeks. In Turkey though.

No, Greeks. But you guys were over in Turkey. Where are you? Oh no, they're happening Greece. You sure? I think it was in Turkey. No, I haven't in Greece. The history is not clear on it. It's always like a triumphant thing with the honest, I remember what he used to talk to me all the time

about the Battle of Crete, about how the Greeks changed the fucking whole landscape of World War II and that one battle. And then I watched the documentary on World War II and that one battle, and then I watched the documentary on World War II, they mentioned the Battle of Creek for literally half a second. They're like, and then Nazis walk through Creek on their way to conquer Poland.

And then Yannis is like, yeah, no, it changed the whole border, it's like, yeah, the Nazis immediately occupied all of Greece. They walked days to take that island. They walked through and they took fucking three days to take fucking island they walk through and they took fucking three days to take fucking all the whole country a Frank and the Germans had a couple things plates in Musaka. Yeah, yeah, get the fuck out of here. Yeah, yeah It took 10 days because Hitler was sunbathing. I'm fucking happy. Yeah, I was Hitler wanted to have us give a vacation on the island

Get me one of those girls who like it in the butt Like it in the butt. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, I like it. Fucking Greeks, man. It's hilarious. I love letting them go. Right now, Mike, I mean, Chrissy D. Listen, right now.

I want you to choose right now. Okay. Mike V. O'Yanis. Yeah. Right now. You gotta go to podcasts or fucking Bay Ridge. Bay Ridge Ridge. Right now.

Who is it? What are you gonna plug? Right now. What have you been doing? What have I been it? Right now, one of them is gonna blow up. One of them is gonna blow up. Is this doing great? One of them is gonna blow up. Is this going to be one of them? Right now, one of them pick it.

Crazy girl, I can't believe it. You can't have both. You're a cripple. Bay Ridge or fucking whatever the podcast is called. I'm an only faces. Yeah. I'm like, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna go at Mike V because, I feel like Yannis inevitably this year is gonna go on one

of his own rants and convince himself that we're all simulations and blow his head off on Really and they rich and there's not much time left for him anyway, so I can you replace Yannis on bearish boys with this fucking go wow No, there's no replacing they just look like plumbers showed up for a job Average boys would be the name of our new fucking craft shop. Truck with a phone number on the side. The big voice, where demolition cleanup service. Hey, how you doing with DYI, the new show on Travel Channel.

With two fucking ufs show up and take your garbage and make it into stuff you can use in your house. We take your garbage and make it into stuff you can use in your house We take your garbage making it into pizza Dude let me ask you a question, so you're gonna pick Mike. No, I don't want to I have to pick up I want to pick court. I want to fucking that's a rock ball You want court and go with court. You know what? That'd be a great show. Yeah east west. He's there it is There we go. He's coastway. There it is. There we go. Right. Meditation show.

Don't share each other's mantras. What is your mantra? Do you call it? You do nap time. What is your court and Chris? What is your, you can talk, fucking your podcast with Mike that too. You haven't heard it. It's electric.

What do you think? What do you think? I don't know. I'm crazy. I have anxiety. We'll let it out? To say that you go Mike the me and Bobby gonna do Bay Ridge boys. I'll fucking Yeah, yeah We fucking walking fucking ma z

What's up, dudeuzz? What's up, Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Puzz? Let's do it cousin. Alright, cousin! I'm gonna punch this kid in the face. Just don't get out of breath when you do it. You could be mean some tired guys. Yo, you know what, it's got a mean streak. You know the guy know that? I've been doing podcasts for about five years. Yeah, this fucking clock's like a Zingsam out. Nice and hot.

Yeah, and Bobby's got one too. Don't bring a fucking Schwarm in here. Whatever you do. Whatever you do. You can talk about his mother, how he grew up as an orphan, you're good. You bring a fucking swarm in here. It is all. I mean, he will threaten your family's life for a swarm up. I'm just loyal. I'm loyal. And I'm loyal to the fucking place that don't eat up here and I fucking.

I get out of here with your food. Air. Loyal to the fucking they said don't eat up here and I fucking I Versus I don't think I do it. I don't think I would have got that bad if he fucked my wife Jesus Bobby guy was eating a shwami he's nutrition He was coming up to say hello. I'm doing a good thing Bobby. I fucked up. I fucked up. You got passion. Yeah. I got passion. You're motherfuckin yo. It was it. It was a culmination. Who was eating it? You know what? Nobody he's over there. This is the fucking body piss me off. He told the Versa you can't eat in the studio. Right. And then I look on the podcast. I said on the podcast. Look over, he's fucking sitting there eating a shwama. First of all, the messiest, I mean,

is there a messier food than a shwama sandwich? Is there any, your guaranteed sauce and a piece of lamb is falling on your fucking shoe, okay? Nobody will argue with you, you're an expert. And he, haha. I'm singing them in, Joel is not. Joel is coming. Joel, just don't say anything about me. I'll cry.

He's gonna cry at that. I'm gonna have to fucking, he's gonna do what's going on with the podcast. I thought I was one of the regs. I mean, you got this fucking third-rate citizen. Fucking 30 Greek guy. Fuck, he's, I mean, you know, me and Sarah home. Man, this isn't the listen to the podcast and have some fun. I got hurt At a call, Louis took me out on a fucking game. You know the Rolex Cawksock, I got a Rolex

I actually got a present from doing Louis movie. Have you seen the movie yet? No, I think they canceled it It's I well, it's out there. Is it out there? Yeah, it's out there. But I don't want to watch it because I feel like I'm fucking them. I want to wait till it comes out and then go support it. I guess I could do, but I feel like I'm stealing from them. You know what I mean? I know I've stolen, but I'm not saying I'm not a fucking I've watched movies, even when I steal a movie though, if I have ever stolen one, if that's the case, if that's true, maybe it is, I always have Wettens bought it

or went to the movies or rented it, you know what I mean? I don't have us, just, you know, whatever. So I don't wanna go and fucking steal it. Was that weird? No. No. No. Why are you freezing up on me right now? Are you sure you hear with me?

Supporting your friend, I like that. Why are you not blinking? You fucking roids kicking out. No. No. No. No, I'm supporting your friend, I like that. Hang on one second while I fucking go through this phase.

Right now, I just wanna rip your head off and shit down your neck, Bobby. It's not you. It's the coffee kick. How my cheeks red? It's my cup of coffee today. I got a present sent to Apostle, fucking over the office over there, which I love those guys. Sir, because the best. They produce Bay Ridge Boyz, but I know. And we love those guys sir because the best they up they produce pay Ridge boys But I know and we love those guys now. They fucking love you love them And I I love the last he the way he shoots is great, right? I mean just I did great guys great guys. Bartow him so letty

So anyways, we a Package was delivered to me months ago. I did it. Me and Rich Voss had a small part in that movie. And I guess they sent out a cool gift. Louis always gave the best fucking swag, like a cool cup, like what, look at the really cool like travel, water mug with Louis on it and she like that. And I got a box. It was like from Louis.

Thanks a lot for a blah, blah, blah. And I held it and it felt kind of heavy. And I was like box, it was like from Louis, thanks a lot for a blah, blah, blah. And I held it and it felt kind of heavy. And I was like, oh God, I give my brand a like, this is a Rolex. You know what I mean? Because I know that Chris gave him, Chris gave him, I be just as good. People like second choice. No sugar, no grains, fucking fuck you, it's a gift. But I remember picking up my open, I was like, oh God, mom, fucking fuck you. It's a gift

But I remember picking up my open I was like I'll go mom of a fucker and I hope it but it was this beautiful camera. That was a great camera Yeah, really nice. So one of those in Stomatics the new ones that has a little tiny a polaroid Really cool stuff. So whatever. I just find my brother up. All right Let's go in a Rolex and you were disappointed. I was a little I was no disrespect. Is that the name of it? That's the name of it. Why no disrespect?

Cause it's too far. I love it guys. I love y'all. It says three podcasts. That's it. How you doing? That's it. How you doing?

That's the Greek. I'm in question. The right wing liberals are crazy. Yeah. I mean, this is getting out. The right-wing liberals are crazy. Yeah. I mean, this is getting out of hand, guys. What do you think, Colin? 577 gas.

577 gas. Doesn't it? Chris and Mike look like a local commercial, though, for a fucking handmade company. We own a dealership. Chris and Mike look like every middleer I've ever had jersey. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha. President Mike looked like every middle I've ever had Hey, I'm working with Robert Kelly this weekend and it has book heights

Hey, it's an honor to be on the stage with this guy Why isn't this respect what are you guys doing? We're just we're fun loving guys would be a nice to to people. Yeah, what is what is a fuck you? I'm nice to you. I love you so much if you're on time Mike. Hmm. You love him so much. You had to make him choose between me and y'all. Yeah, that was a nice choice. I was out of fucking love. I wasn't because it's gonna happen someday and I want him to fucking have I have it ready to go. Yeah, pull the trigger for you. you. I'm not fucking hanging around on either sides. Cut that arm off. You don't saw it off. All right?

And I think you made the exact wrong choice. This guy's going somewhere. All right. Wow. It's a fun podcast. I love it. It really is. We made some bold choices.

We made some friends. We made some enemies. You leave here a stronger person. I love it. Hey, here a stronger person. I love it. Hey, here's our logo. Me and a wint the puffy coat, me and a shirt that I wear all the fucking time. I'm actually wearing it right now.

It's wearing out. That's the coincidence. That's why I said the job. That's why I said the job. I wish you shot that it was true. I was like, Jesus, Mike, you have more than three shirts. You don't even live in Ohio anymore. Come on.

Things aren't going that well Chris didn't make the wrong choice please always have a job at my bowling alley Our logo is just a black swish in the background You have any red paint Make a swish behind us so we stick out no disrespect Cold miters are gonna love it. What the fuck? Yeah, truckers, we're gonna, yeah.

Yo, yo, yo. Dude, we're two guys with fucking short tight haircuts. Yeah. And we say note to respect at the same time. We'll start the box and say, yo, yo, and then we're like, no, there's three spang. Like echoes. Dude, that sounds similar to the fucking barrage, boys.

Yeah. I mean, it sounds similar. fucking Bayridge boys. Yeah I'm not trying to stop chef saying you know look you can't take something from the other That's all you said right that the ad mic to the Bayridge boys. Maybe you put him in the Bayridge boys I can do it that spot there put him in there before you for sure I'm fucking Union I'm doing your free shit. Fucking a whole Wednesday. Freezing my toes off.

Fucking get you 400 fucking views. Listen. Listen. Listen. I think this is a terrible podcast. This is what he talked about. I'm not having fun. I mean, who you shut up?

What are you, Joe? Shut up. Who is that? Do you see we abroad snacks? No, this is the bad ass. I just keep going. I'm sorry. It's not. More diversity would have been nice.

I got more diversity. Well, the reason why I had this was a, this was a Bay Ridge fucking show. This is a Bay Ridge fucking show. But I also, I also wanted him on, I also wanted him on, because he's on your podcast. So it's kind of fit.

And then court is in town. There's a good friend of mine. I wanted, he was like, I want to come on the show. It's absolutely come on the show. So it was just going to need to meditate for eight hours after this. Like a week. Jesus. Now in LA, is it like this out there with the comics? No. I mean, I mean, there's, yeah, there's a certain group. Yeah, that are fun like this. But I mean, New York's got this, New York's got such a great vibe with comics. And it's like, it's fun. But like, you know, I'm at the comedy store, so that like is a good hang because like, here, you have great hangs like you guys have the, you know, the comedy seller, but if you're

not. And the comedy seller. Yeah, those, yeah, those are two great, but you are comedy club. But yeah, but you guys don't like, but what we have in LA is because we drive everywhere, everyone just hangs out at the store all fucking night. You guys go place to place to place. And I saw Chris when I was at the store a few weeks ago. I love it there, I mean, I love it.

But there's a lot more accessible here as far as being able to do two, three spots in a night, which is a lot of fun. You know what I hate about, we do bus balls, we do have these things, but I hate that these fucking sure, you know, I hate this thing where it's like, dude, what is it a fucking? What do you, you know, like we, not everything is the seller or something. I was like, dude, we just have fun.

Just having a good time. I say, I only want to fucking be mean to my friends. I don't want to be mean to people I don't know. I just, I don't feel right about it. If you're not my friend, and I don't really like you, I don't want to be mean to people I don't know. I just, I don't feel right about it. If you're not my friend, and I don't really like you, I don't want to be mean to you. But I really don't. It doesn't make me feel good whatsoever.

I don't want to, so it's like that's such a, you know. I see you have, but see, I like the ball busting thing. Like I, I, I, I, I busted your balls at all during the show. I know, I know, I know. I know. I know. What a joke. Go back to LA. Get the fuck out of here. Yeah, pretty skin Fucking American Indian skin. Oh, I hate it

But no, but the funny thing is is I love coming to the seller hanging out with you guys and it's a lot of fun to do that Yeah, like to me. That's a lot of fun. Yeah, but anyway. Yeah, yeah what I do, nothing. It's a lot of static right now. Yeah, what's going on? What's going on with the static, though? Man. Kids from a story. All right. What happened? Oh, yeah. You're disloyal to a story of being a Greek that doesn't live there. I know. Yeah. All right. We're going to fix all this. Anyway, we're going to wrap this up. This is going to be a great podcast. You guys have been fantastic. Court. What do you got? Court. I got this weekend. I'm at Gotham Friday Thursday Friday and Saturday. Oh shit. Go haven't great club. Gotham and I had a great time last time I was there. Yeah, the manager. Who's that young kid? Andrew Schwartz. I fucking love that kid. Class of place. Great place. The

Gandry took I like came down. The Zillies are great. Right on top of it. Chris was there. The best. The mazillies are the best. They really are great guys. Great. Had a great time. Like crowds were great. Everything was great last time I was there. And then next weekend I'm at the La Jolla Comedy Store on the West Coast.

So East Coast and West Coast. All right, great. All right, so thanks for coming in. Thanks for having me. Great to hang with the guys here. Yeah, awesome. Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you too, buddy.

He's the best. I love court. I remember the old days, Jesus Christ, we had such fun of days. It wasn't that long ago. How five years ago? Okay. Yeah.

Yeah, you didn't, you, you were still dying your hair. I was still dying my hair there. Yeah, yeah, I did. I did salt and pepper looks great. It's, it's way better. Now you're using medicine. Medicine. Yeah, that's what we call the die.

Oh. So the boy is the bear is right guys. Yeah. When was the last time you used a die? I'll look at my phone for my dates, Bobby. No, we got your dates. Put that away. We got you.

All right. Put that away. A professional show. Except we have to make a call. Yeah. They're coming. You want to go next? No, I'd like to, I, it doesn't matter to me.

Whatever you want, Bob. I'm going to, whatever you want. Whatever you want, Bob. Whatever you want. What do you want? You want you, Bob? I'll go right now. If you want let's go right now Let's bring him up. She put him up. Yeah. I am date sign up to who's she the person rooms my website I just got my website back up and running who's your personal roads your website. Uh, giggle check giggle check Who's that? She's a that's her business. She does a lot of comics websites. Who?

Giggle check. I'm sorry. Am I fucking stomping you. Yeah, all right I'm a real name. I fucking read your Instagram her real name is how you might have more information her real name escapes me at the moment I think it's Aaron Aaron that's right I don't know if you want to say I'm a box. Thanks for fucking. I didn't mean that. I didn't know you were fucking losing your brain I just cuz I'm losing my brain. All right. God Aaron. Of She's the best by the way if you want your website done go look at that Aaron great you me check it out. So March 8th the 11th Grisae Jed Johnson Chris

Fucking H2 who doesn't like you. He does not like it. He's becoming evident. Oh my god He just I looked over and I don't blame him look at this piece of shit. What are you doing? It's a fake person that I create it. Yeah, this is not this is not me. This is more of making a character But I that she wants to fuck is it make you angry to have to wear guy clothes? Yeah, it's weird. I just I it's weird. How bad do you want you in chiller on that leather? I just want Whoa, you know, if you don't get that for me and put it in the intro. I'll fucking murder all of you I just want to dick. Oh, Yannis. Go ahead. So March 8th, the 11th of Syracuse funny bone 20. What do you finger pop in somebody? No, my career is just great. Okay. No, what is this little move you're doing? Oh, that's a Greek

What is that in the ass? Why don't you even mouth open like that? I'm a that because I'm gonna dick in it he's saying more to Ziki I got what are you else march 8th 11th Syracuse funny boat march 23rd through 25th governors leviton Gotham

May 4th of 5th rock the range festival May 19th it 5th, Rock the Range Festival May 19th. It's always good when they show the apartment you're in. Let's take a wide angle, then show all the shit in the background. August 8th, August 9th to the 11th, Jersey Point Pleasant. Oh, look at that. And then Leavety Live, June 1st and 3rd. Oh, so sincere.

And also my podcast, Rigorous Podcasts with Marisa, Mr. Pano's podcast, and also my podcast rigorous podcast with marisa Mr. Pano's podcast. Yes, also Bayridge boys would Chris the Stefano Apostle and Cervical directed by Jim Cervical He's fucking great kids great too. I just shot the I'll get to it when I get to my thing Mikey V. What do you got Mikey V? Listen you guys who are listening don't tune out because funny stuff happens and if you know my podcast You don't tune out right now. You listen because we're still going those shows still going DC improv We You definitely could.

We're kicking it to me now. Thank you Bobby. Bobby, no matter if I'd be at the DC improv this week, GC 18 to the 20th. Yes. It'll be great shows. And then next week in Edmonton, Canada, January 24th. Bring merch.

Bring merch. Oh, best merch down in the world. That's what they say. Yeah. Bring merch. I never brought merch. Go see my. You leave like a grand on the table if you know.

Yeah, well, I don't know what that is in Canadian money. I don't know. You go to a rubah for a rubah race. I'm doing for a rubah race. Love that, cake. It's unbelievable. How great is that cake, son? The best.

I feel like Chrisy deal be at the end. Maybe we do a portable podcast. I don't know. Stay tuned. You think it crazy? I don't know how it's going to go down. You never know. A vacation into a podcast. Valley Fororge, you should do a residency there.

Valley Forge, yeah. Hello, my name is Mike Vecchio. I'll be here for next seven months, performing at Valley Forge. A lot of fun dates. So just, uh, keep me in. Stone Harbor, New Jersey. Stone Harbor, yeah. That sounds like fun.

Where is that? Uh, it's in New Jersey. Is that a harbor? Are you actually in a harbor? I think it's a casino. I'm not really sure I'm Mikey Mikey V gotta check him out hilarious stand-up committee one of the best one of my Things that's not the shirt again. Let's not get carried away Definitely a funny guy. No one of the best. I love all right. You it's personal thoughts, but listen

One of the best. I love all right. It's personal thoughts, but listen No, we're not playing his clip. I we've done it a million really have you really played it. Yeah, oh my god Black shirt Let's let's the one under it is the same shirt as the one above it. God the one under that is Mike has a show shirt You Yeah. I do. I have a show shirt. You were born in a small town. Just one shirt man. Mike has a show shirt. Honey, get my show shirt ready. I gotta go to Pekipsi tonight. I just booked it. My, and Chrissy did just canceled some happened to his hair. And that's fancy for him too.

He doesn't even look comfortable in a button. And he's like, give me a fucking car heart sweatshirt to match this face. All right, give me the band down. All right, Chrissy, I'm out of the house. Oh, Chrissy D, what do you got? All right, all right. We got your thing ready at Chrissy.

Yeah, I'll cut that away. But just phone away. Look at that gay guy right now. Wow, who's that kid? Fucking, yeah, I can't go. You are gay, bang! You are gay, baby! You are gay, baby! Look how fucking gay that is.

Okay. I love that your hair turns into a dick. That's a crack. The cuck cut. That's a cuck's up in the step and out. The cuck cut. Give me the cuck cut. You know what? You are photogenic. Yeah, youogenic. Yeah, you don't look like that in person

No, right? You in the photo not right here. Yeah right here. He's charismatic body. He's not that kid Bobby that could have been in the outsiders. There's one thing. He's a good looking kid. We all know yeah That's a line from Bayridge boys. You can go walk but if but go if you had if you had that head on that body right now we would there there's a little there he looks like a shoulder monster from bugs money I don't know that guy he looks that's a crazy he looks like There he is where is he show me that fucking show the monster there he is You get that tattoo in your back All right go to Chrissy's

All right, I have a February 10th though February 10th I'm filming a one hour special for comedy central Ru-let in Brooklyn where is that roulette third? I try not to land to Gavin in third street. I swear. I'm roulette in Brooklyn. Where is that roulette? It's on Atlantic Avenue in third street. It's also in the warehouse district. Yeah, yeah, it's my uncle owns the place. And then, how's he really? No. Pittsburgh Improv.

Good club. March 1st, 2nd, 3rd. Yeah, then March 8th, 9th, 10th. Hilarities and Cleveland. I love that guy who owns it. Yeah, it's good guy. Nick Degree. Yeah, Nick got fuck cock second last time

I saw him he's like do we gonna get you back in here. Yeah, I was like I'd love to and then never hear from me again March 22nd 23rd 24th Comics Mohican Sun and then April 12th 13th 14th As an improv. Yeah fuck Texas. Yeah bring a gun. No, that's the great. That's a great club because right across is that dueling piano thing. Oh, said it's just drunk. Yeah, every Yeah, that's what I want my shows that I work so hard to fucking have you people listen now come in at six get drunk by eight and then Fucking go to a dueling piano is on your mind. That's what I want. That's talking to you. Uh, if I never play that club again, I'll be fucking happy. Um, but have fun Chris. Thank you. Uh,

uh, Levity live Levity live great club. There you go. May 10th 1112. All right Chris. Hey, how you put Mother's Day on your dates? Mother's Day and Father's Day. Why? Memorial Day because I'm Funky. He knows his parents because I love my mom my dad. I love this country Patriot so I put Memorial Day mom and dad or he just copy and paste it as Google calendar That's you know that's more like it. Yeah nice. Um, I what do I got? How are we? We're losing the crowd they gone they're turning the fucking podcast off as we speak. Oh my god fat black pussy cat

How for funny bone this week and if you're around and then the stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop Lafactory Chicago 2628 Gabby you read these my eyes are fun. I'm gonna head a back post-eat cat on the 31st of January that black post-eat cat Jesus McGooby's joke house February 1st second third. Yes,, for you. Oh, yes. I'm just going back. I love Seattle. You guys like Seattle? I love it.

I've never been to Seattle. That's a great club too. That's the fun. I love it. I got it. I'm going to go. I really wrap it up. All right, so go to my website robacalive.com.

Mikey, what do you got? I've got a show this Thursday at the LaFaat LaFaat in Tantoneo. Yep. And that's all. OK. Jeez, that was honest. And that's it. For the year of 2018. What do you got, Gabby?

I have a show Friday and Bushwick, and that's it for now. Go to my Instagram. All right, go to Instagram. That's cool. What do you got, Zach? Zach, then you go. Every show.

Every week, and every show. And hey, buddy, thanks for coming. Did you have fun? What's your name again? Dave, all right, Dave. Thank you so much for coming in you guys are the best fans in the world Premium members like Dave I got a big announcement my patreon is going up Robert Kelly's patreon. We're gonna do a bunch of shit over there We're gonna we just filmed a bunch of stuff yesterday live from the shed show is gonna

We're gonna stop filming that very soon. A lot of great shit. I'm working with all kinds of people with some stuff for this Patreon page that we're putting up. It's gonna be a community for you guys, my fans, just my fans, not you cock suckers who chime in the fuck with me.

You guys can go fuck yourselves. But every, this podcast will always be free. Just know that. If you can't afford every this podcast will always be free just know that if you can't afford it this will always be free I want to thank you guys are the best these cocks look at their like fucking high school kids. They're already on their phones Can't wait two seconds Looking up all your dates Right there you oh, oh there. Come on. I love you All right, you guys the best fans of the world. Thank you so much for listening. See you next of the best podcasts on the internet. And they're all free.

And they're all free. Shard. Shard. Shard. Shard. Shard. Shard. Shard.