Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Sean Patton | EDM Boat

Episode Date: July 23, 2023

This week Bobby is joined by comedian Sean Patton, they talk about Bert Kreischer's comedy cruise, how great the show Tough Crowd was, and they take an online quiz to figure out what Yellow Stone characters they are most like. This episode is sponsored by GhostBed Listeners can get 40% off all products sitewide! Use promo code YKWD at GhostBed.com/ykwd for 40% Off Sitewide. Limited Time Only. This episode is sponsored by Mint Mobile Listeners can get an unlimited wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month, and get the plan shipped to your door for FREE by going to mintmobile.com/YKWD Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Activia es único, porque a diferencia de otros, activia ha demostrado que sus millones de probióticos naturales llegan vivos a la microbiota. Y además ayuda a tu salud digestiva. Activia. ¿Sueñas con un futuro más allá de los estudios de grado? Gracias a las becas de post-grato en el extranjero, de la Fundación La Caixa, puedes estudiar en las mejores universidades y centros de investigación del mundo. Tu talento te mueve. Solicitate en fundación lacaisa.org.

Buscas contenido gratis. Pluto TV es el servicio de streaming gratuito con series como South Park o Sensación de Vivir. Descarga ya la aplicación en todos tus dispositivos. Flutotiví, ven a verlo sin pagar nunca. down here. Rafe was down here. That was the 90s. That was down here. EDM's more up here. It's more cerebral. It's more up here. And he's just at this level where I'm like, I don't feel like having this argument. Yeah. So I go, all right, man. Yeah. Are you a DJ yourself? And he goes, no, no, no, I'm an anesthesiologist. And he just twirls back off into the fray. And that's what it hit me. I'm like, Oh, yeah, it's a shit out of me. But that's, but I'm also like everyone there was like 30s, 40s and had money. We're all starting before them all! I'm being lied to by King Diabetes.

Podcast is so fun and crazy and there's no rules. Shut up, you all ruining this! Burn the bomb, damn it! I'm so sorry! It's a comedy podcast. This is an NPR. That's the podcast done! Is there any better show?

This is the original. Original. What's up everybody, it's Robert Kelly here again at the Comedy Cell Studios YKW. You know what, we're above the salary dude at the first fucking studio in New York. It's a fact by the way, first podcast studio in New York right here, done by your boy, RPK, Robert Patrick Kelly. I got a very special guest tonight. It's, uh, I think while since you've been on, yeah, last time, in fact, last time I was here, there was, I think seven of us, seven, seven guests. I don't do it anymore.

I just don't do it. Sean Patten, everybody. We did it. Back in the day. Look, it back in the day. It was a conversation. Well, here's the thing. I started out with Joe DeRosa. It was me and Joey in my house.

And then we added Dan Soda. Yeah. Joey got an ego. Joe DeRosa, what she has. I was like, dude, we should do this together. Nah, dude, I'm gonna do my own thing, dude. And he just know that Billy and him were doing stuff. Dude, your co-tails aren't big enough for me,

you know what I mean? Basically. If you go to a shop that you can get the ego, it's got Mortadella. Yeah. And Upper Jelly on it. Exactly. Well, you know what I think about him, dude,

is for some reason the other day, the phrase, derosa parks, pop to my fucking head. I told him about this. I can't stop thinking about Joe Derosa parks, just like the, oh, I gotta sit on the back of the bus. Why, can you sound Egyptian? Fuck you.

Cause I don't know my dad. I don't know who I am. Sometimes I do. Sometimes I have parents. Sometimes I don't feel bad for me. I love Joey. Joey Roses. Gotta love Joe. And then, uh, and, Joey Rose's, got to love Joe.

And then it was Dan, me and Lewis. And we would always add another comic, like Nate or Janus to the mix. So it was five people. And then everybody was like, this was before Pike and then nobody knew. So people were like, can I come on, I'm like, all right.

So we'd have to get like eight mics. And it was, you couldn't, I didn't understand people listening, didn't, couldn't hear anything. Sound like a fucking just a wave of words, just like they're in a tsunami of riffing. I, it literally took age and wear and tear on me. You're like, hey man, I don't wanna have seven people on anymore,

because I just don't have, I was getting angry. I was, every time I did this show, I'd be like, that wasn't fun. Well, remember what the original spirit of podcasting that attracted everyone to podcasting was me and some friends talking, yeah, me, and Bobby Kelly. No, you and some friends just talking shit on microphones. Record it, put it out there, people love it.

Now there's so much like... Well, you know who made podcasting big. Marin? Comedians. Comedians, oh yeah. Comedians, yeah. It made it, but we also made, we also made it to where every asshole has one.

Because comedy is the same thing. We make it look effortless. And they like, I can do this, and they wanna go, it's a job now. You can be a comic now as a job. It's like people are going like, I can do this, and they wanna go, it's a job now. You can be a comic now as a job. It's like people are going like, I'm gonna do stand up. It's like back when we were coming up, it was a dream.

Dream. It's not happening. This is so fucking funny. I was having this conversation, this argument with myself on my way here, being like, I don't bring that up on a podcast. And immediately you do. So now I'm like, yes.

What do you mean you talk to yourself? That last night downstairs, great show. And then afterwards I'm talking to another comic outside and this dude comes up afterwards. He's like, man, you make me want to, not to me to the other guy, it was more successful, I won't say his name. But, what was it rhyme with? Andrew Schultz.

Andrew, Andrew, Andrew, Andrew had a fun great set and this guy comes up to Andrew and he's just like, man, you make me want to be a comedian. And Andrew's just like, yeah, sure, man, you know, nice to the kid, but he's like, you know, yeah, give it a try sometime, whatever. And then Andrew has to go, and then the guy starts talking to me more.

Oh, but he's just like, man, you know, like, he really does, man, I just want to try it. I'm just saying, and I was like, are you funny? He's like, I mean, I don't know, I guess I'll find out. Oh, fuck. And you're like, that's what it is now. It's people who have never in their life

even thought about considered tried to, even in get, like, funny was never the idea. But then they see this and they're like, oh, I can do that. And that's why, because you accurately quote Will Ferrell lines to your friends. Because they can watch comics and learn how to do it. Back in the day, there was no YouTube,

there was no TikTok, there was no Instagram. You had to go to a club and hang out to watch comics or pay to see comics. There was comics on TV on the tonight show. But now, kids are watching comedy from the age of 10 until 18 and like, I'm just gonna go do this. Oh, set up punch tag, I get it. My mom's a cunt, you know?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's it, it's like music. It's aaped that out so I don't, I can get monetized. Well, it's like what, it's what happened to me. It's what happened to like music in the 90s. Where like there's so much, it's like music. It's like comedy is now where music was. Where music was just, everyone was like,, I want to be in a band.

Oh, I want to be a singer. Oh, but it's less that they want to do the thing. It's more that they want the celebrity. They want the fame and the money. They want the success. They want the glory. Sure. And they can get it now too.

They can get it. You don't have to have, you don't have to be a funny person to get success. What? Serious. No. Buddy. No. Listen to me. Bobbi you are you telling me there's people out there who are huge But not funny

Dude, I'm saying they this yes. No like Sean next you got to tell me they sell tickets for every other reason other than making someone laugh Yes, that's insane. Sean. I'm not kidding buddy listen listen Sean there's people out there They do one TikTok and then the club will book them for 19 shows and they make Hundreds of thousands of dollars and they don't even know how to tell a joke and there next thing you're gonna Tell me tick tocks a real thing not just a riff. We all do tick talk is real That's not this guy come on Bobby. You do you know I'm serious. That was a good one That was good. we stayed in. Me kind of fell off of the TikTok thing.

I jumped too far. You little, I jumped, I tell you, I could have taken one more baby step before I started running. No? What are you gonna do? You learn. What if that clip is the one that popped us over?

That clip made us hit on TikTok. On TikTok, fucking massive. You, you, you, me, you have to tour together. Eight years we hate each other. But see, you, me, you have to tour together. Eight years we hate each other. But hey, every radio duo, we wear shirts that say tick and talk. We come to TikTok boys. Come to TikTok boys. Come to TikTok boys.

I gotta get glasses. Yeah, you get glasses. I gotta start smoking cigars. No, you do, you have to drink and have glasses. You smoke cigars and have glasses. We're tick and talk. Tick and talk. And we have TickTack sponsor us. Oh have glasses. We'll tick tick and talk. Tick and talk. And we have tick tack sponsor us.

Oh my god. I do. This is this is happening. The tick tack boy sponsored by the. Oh, thank you to come with the tick shock. We start wrapping at the beginning of the show. We try it. We try it. We try and we tick and talk.

We're here. Not a cock. We tell dirty jokes, but you know how it goes. Because that's how we flow. It's tick and talk. And that's how we go. We pull tick and talk and that's how we got. We pull out the gap. I just choked at my chicken again.

Oh, fuck, I just beat box. All right, that was good. I was actually choking as well, but I did it really. I choked at my rap. Tick, tick, tick. We try it, we won up Burton. We just put more clothes on. That's what we do.

We wear jackets. We show up in like fucking wolf coats. Yeah. I mean, that, I mean, the whole birthday is, as we do. We wear jackets. We show up in like fucking wolf coats. I mean, that, I mean, the whole bird thing is, I mean, this tour, have you been on it? I'm doing the, I'm doing the one at sea. What's that mean? So he's doing a round of fully loaded on ships on cruise ships on the ocean. Yeah, cruise ship. You say the sea. We don't have a sea around us. C. We loaded a C. No, I'm glad I said cruise ships, not just.

You know what's on ships, on industrial liners. Yeah, you're doing merchant marine games. We're doing ocean liners. Just us in a bunch of storage crates. It's us, three Navy seals and some container ship captain. Yeah, and 28 guys who don't speak anything but Filipino, but they're not from the Philippines. No, then. No, yeah, yeah. And 28 guys who don't speak anything but Filipino, but they're not from the Philippines. No, they're not.

Ha, ha, ha. No, yeah, that's good. I mean, I've done, I did the jokers. Yeah. And I did the calta crews, which I love calta crews, because what's that? Mike Calta down in Tampa. Okay.

He has his own crews once a year. Oh, so he'll, he like, I've done it. A birthday. I did it with Bert. He got to be pretty. I mean, he's just like a super successful guy in Tampa. He's number one radio show. Oh, radio.

Okay. Radio. Radio guy. Radio guy Tampa. Super successful. Number one guy. And he does a cruise. But his cruise is awesome.

You come in the first night. You do a show. and you're done. And then you just hang out and then buy, yeah. It's it, then you go, Oh, you get to use on the boat for a while. You're on the boat, you get to hang. I don't hate cruise as like everybody else. I've only been on two.

One was with my family, and one was the only time that their problem in a cruise ship was an EDM cruise in early 2020. So it'd be pandemic. Electronic dance music. I know what it is. EDM Fest, they did three comedians. What? They just wanted to come and talk, baby.

I hate it. It was actually not terrible, because every night we all just did an hour, like separate times. And I basically got the time where everyone had clearly just taken whatever they were gonna zoot off into the night with. Right. So I got to go on stage for the hour while they were waiting for it to kick in.

Everyone was pretty focused. Like the shows weren't bad, which would be walking around. Like I remember at one point, so I'm arguing, but I get in a conversation with this guy with like a cowboy hat covered in LED lights. Okay. Nippel rings, topless, sequined G-Tring. I mean, roller skates, right? And during my set, I'd referred to it as rave music.

Right. So he is like in my face, right? Just Coke breath. You know, like, Coke like fucking cocaine breath. Sure, yeah. Post nasal drift. Yeah. Just hot. And he's like, no, man, no, no. No, because rave music, just two down here. Rave was down here. That was a 90s, that was down here. EDM's more up here. It's more cerebral.

It's more up here. And he's just at this level where I'm like, I don't feel like having this argument. So I go, all right man, yeah, are you a DJ yourself? And he goes, no, no, no, I'm an anesthesiologist. And he just twirls back off into the fray. And that's what it hit me. I'm like, oh, here's the shit out of it.

But that's what I was like, everyone there was like 30s, 40s and had money. So it made the show a lot easier because you're like okay, it's just a bunch of fucking 21 year olds You know smacked out of their skull. Well, yeah, I did the call to in Cali one of course all his fans They know me so it was great. Yeah, and then I did every time I walked into the dining hall They would go Bob oh as I walk down Bob oh Bob oh so it was fun and I did the othero. Bobo, Bobo. So it was fun. And the other one I did, but first he was there, DeRose was there.

I believe Nate was, it was everybody. That's so, Jessica was there. The only thing that's talked about dad is you have to do more than one show. Yeah. So it's like, look, I do one of these things. I want to do one show and I'm done. I don't want to fucking. I like one a night.

I want one and done. Like even at clubs now, you're just like one. Oh dude, I do. Let me say something. I've been going into places and doing just, yeah, one show. If it sells out, I'll do two. Okay. And then I'm it.

And that's it. If not, fine. I'll just do one, walk out. And I'll come back the next year. Yeah. And more people will buy tickets. Yeah. I mean, this whole thing of going walk out. Yeah, and I'll come back the next year. Yeah more people buy tickets. Yeah I mean this whole thing of going tonight tonight's rough sometimes tonight. Yeah, dude I remember doing three Number three on Saturday's

I still have those three on Saturday's six. Oh, yeah, was it six eight thirty and ten thirty or so shit if the club is good I don't mind it suck my dick. I'm an employee. I'm an employee at that point. No, dude. I'm an employee. I'm like, I just work for you now. And you're still, I like, that was when I was making like a guarantee.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm looking out of the crowd, counting heads going, that's $50,000 you just made. Yeah. I don't care, even without ticket sales, you made 50 grand on booze. Yeah. I just made. Yeah. I don't care. Even without ticket sales, you made 50 grand on booze. Yeah. I'm out.

Yeah. I'm out. I mean, there is something about the moment you learn that you are actually more in control than you thought. Yeah. That you got there yet? Yes, but the problem is I just, I don't have the fan base yet to follow.

Well, you just came out with a special. I did. And who did your special? Uh special 800 pound gorilla produced it. Michael Chey produced it as well. So like 800 pound gorilla like, like, produced it on the ground. Chey came in like an angel and brought it to peacock. How did you get hooked up with Michael Chey? I'm just known him since he's been around, you know, like we were just,

because he was like part of that crew, like when like me and Soder, me Soder, you know, fucking Bergatsi, I mean Nate was always kind of ahead of us, but me and Soder and that crew and then Jay was like right there. He was starting out. And he was always like, I remember the first time I saw him at the knitting factory, just like funny guy and then just as years went by, we just kind of like, you know, stayed friends. And then before the pandemic, I drunkenly said something about like needing someone to produce a special one day. And he was like, I will happily do that for you. Really?

Yeah, yeah. And I was like, you know, over the years, you know, I don't, this isn't like a sh, I'm not, over the years, a lot of people tell you a lot of shit. Yep. And friends, a lot of them are friends of yours too. Boo-goo were like, ah man, one day, you know, hey, let me help you out.

And sometimes more often than not, they just can't. And it's not that they don't want to, it's that they can't, they don't have the time, they don't actually have the resources they thought they did, or they can't use those resources to just help, you know what I mean? And I don't take that personally, I get it. But Che is the guy who like, from the moment he said, I will help you, he never, he 100% was on it.

Yeah. And we hung out, we hung out, we went last summer, I went to his house and almost fucked up a gumbo, but did pretty well. And he, we decided then. He's never done anything for me. I mean, maybe he has, maybe he's producing this podcast. You know, I got three autistic kids producing this podcast, unless he's paying their medical bills. He's not doing anything.

Need the autistics to do the producing. Yeah, you're 100%. I've never been happier. I used to hire hot chicks to be over there. It sucked. Can't yell at them. I can yell at these guys. They don't remember it like three minutes later. They never look me in the eyes. Hey, listen, you need the audistics because the keyword is ought. Well, here they know how to make ought. Out ought audistics.

Well, you know what, you're right about that. Like, Louis has been that guy for me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, Dane back in the day was, you know. Wait, actually, did I ever tell you, I've never gotten to tell you this to your face. I'm so excited. Oh, you fucked my wife.

Well, I mean, listen, wall, bang my wife. I never got to, I left the notes what you told me, too. No, I thought that was the king. I had notes everywhere. No, the episode of Louis, that where you're playing the brother and the mom vying for the mom's love. Yeah.

That was such fucking good acting. Thank you, buddy. Like such fucking good acting. Thank you, buddy. Like to the point where I was almost like, do I not do I have an issue with Bobby that I think he's this good? You know where I was like, would I expect him to be bad? No, but it was like, you were, you were so like genuinely good.

Yeah, I don't, I believe sometimes I'm just a really good actor that I'm acting the role of a comedian. Ah, like this is all bullshit. For 20, 30 years. I'm just, because this is paying the bill, this is my biggest role at, is podcasting and stand up a comedian. I feel like if you could just give me a part in a play

or a TV show, I'll ride that into the sunset. I love the idea, you go home and you take the glasses off and it or a TV show. I'll ride that into the sunset. I love the idea you go home You take the glasses off and it's a guardian mouth. They're like hello dear Today on the clubs. It was quite a tumultuous ride. I had Sean Patinon I'm patinon You know what the guys little chubby but nice He reminds me of your uncle Yeah, so good. Thank you man. I appreciate that. Yeah, Louie Louie is one of those guys. I mean look at Colin

Colin used to put me on tough crowd when they didn't want me no shit dude I found out I found out later the original community read comedy podcast dude the original the original 100% yeah, that's you right. Yeah, the because that's all podcasts are now. Yeah, just five guys cameras. Yeah, ruining their careers I mean, dude, you can't watch this show now Dude, there's a funny show. I mean, that was right when I was starting out comedy and I watch that fucking show Religiously and there were some episodes. I, the one where Patrice goes off on Marin or just tells him to shut up. What? There was one where Marin was going off

saying something. Really? And this was like pre-podcast Marin. Right, right, right. When he was, Yeah, Marin was shut up, Mark. He's like, fuck, and Patrice didn't give a fuck who you were.

Scott Thompson went after someone once which I thought was hilarious, because he was just like, what's he doing on that show? But I mean, huge kids in a whole fan, but I think it was the Paula or someone. He like fucking went after, it was pretty good. Her all, her all dough going after.

Leary. Leary was fucking, it was real. Epic. It was a real moment, but that was the original comedy. But they didn't want that. They didn't want that.

No, of course not. Yeah, they can't see the way they were doing. And they had to do they wanted the daily show Really, yeah, that's what happened the daily show and she'll hell I mean the daily show came out of that and it was more politically correct more left leaning Yeah, and I mean look at what's his name? It's John Stuart was great. Love them. Oh, yeah, I'm at it But yeah, they didn't want fun.

Dude, it was too, they didn't want it. It was too much. It was too funny. I watched that show. It was too, it was too much trouble. Yeah. You watch it now, dude. You couldn't, you could, that show could not.

Don't you find it now. It's on YouTube. It's YouTube. That's rainy, it's fucked up. And you can't, I mean, you can't, you can't even play that. Yeah. The shit that they set on that show was outrageous. Oh, dude. I mean, I say it's a redo for a comeback as a podcast. Like if we find out Keith just fake two strokes, so no one would ever go

after him for the shitty said. It was actually, yeah, he had, he had a repent from Amy and in Judd Abitale made him take stroke pills. If you want to be with us, you have to, you have to stop moving the right side of your body. Oh, they're Keith, speaking of last, we're at Chase house, Eatin' Gumbo. I never was asked. I didn't, I didn't make the guess list.

It's okay. But Keith's eating the gumbo and he's like halfway through and he goes, wait, is there pork in this? And I was like, was like oh fuck we're all like yeah, man. It's not doing his pork He goes shit. I'm Muslim and everyone has this moment. He goes nah So fucking funny dude, he's just Keith first. Oh, he didn't say it that smoothly Secondly, you went what three times? What? Huh? What? Oh, then you laughed.

Yeah, Keith. Fucking funny. His new hour, dude. Oh, yeah. You'll talk about who's, he has so many famous friends get on it and get it on that. I don't know if they can do it now because the writer's strike and the actor's strike. From what I know about that, because I I'm gonna go I'm gonna go strike tomorrow I'm gonna go pick you line tomorrow. You're right. Are right. I'm sag. You're sag. Yeah. Yeah, you're going

Well, we're on we do we go are we on it? Are we yeah you want to go? No, no, okay? I'm a guy. I just want to go see I have to do my sauna and then I have to do tricep shoulders tomorrow I just want to go get in on it and then I have YKWD extra extra extra extra extra No, I would be on end only fans. I have I would love an only fans dude only fans is buying content from what I'm from what from they bought to do the roasts they did birch roasts and Whitney's rose they there's a show I heard there's like a scripted series are they are they getting good content I mean hey wait a minute I mean that's an oxymoron. Whoa.

So this whole writer's strike. So now you can do anything that you produce. If you pay for it or someone else, if it's independently produced and not money for a streamer, or for a streamer, but you can do it every one. Really? You just can't take, you can't work for strict striked companies, which is every studio.

Yeah, but so you can't film a special. Yes, you can., which is every studio. Yeah, but so you can't film a special. Yes, Ken, if you pay for it. So if, say, like, he could film the special now. Right. And if he, if someone's paying, if he's paying for it or if like other people are paying for it, and then either shop it somewhere or put it on YouTube,

that's totally, What if Netflix wants it? He can't talk to Netflix right now. Really? I mean, if he's, if he, I mean, that's where it gets tricky. Cause then it's like, you know, you're crossing the line because we can't even do ads on bonfire. You can't know for move, because we can't, no, we can't, we all are after it. Yeah, that's, yeah, after I'm saying after and I'm in the writer's guild, which, you know, I mean,

I guess I have to go out at some point and walk a picket line. Do you, I mean, get out there. I mean, no, you got a platform right here. I say use the platform. Yeah. You know, I mean, this is my picket line right here. Like the picket lines a lot of photo.

You know what I mean? You can sign, please, real quick. Yeah. With a straw, use a straw, make me sign, I'm gonna hold it up and here, we'll do it here. I think the picket lines also a lot of photo ops yet, but I also like, I'm not famous. I just wish the writers, picket line wouldn't just talk shit.

Write better t-shirts. I think that's their whole, their whole angle. Is that they have shitty signs? Is that like, we don't, but we're not writing. You're not paying us. Yeah, right? What do you think about it though? What do you think about that whole?

I mean, I think the money needs to be fair. And the money needs to change. I think it needs to shift like it is fucked up. Okay, so basically streaming services get paid a monthly thing. Now there's only the 70 million streaming services. HBO, all the up streaming, Paramount Plus, Amazon, everybody has a streaming guru, right? Next, Paramount Plus. And they Paramount plus and they're buying stuff.

They're buying stuff out. Yeah, we'll pay you this much you done. You're not getting into there's no back end. There's no back end anymore. Right, right, right. They leave it up there. They own it forever. But they all, but the people in charge are making insane amounts

versus what they've always made insane amount. But maybe that needs to change. But okay, but, you know, like, don't you think they have to, well, they're gonna have to go back to commercials and shows. And that's how they get the money to pay the writers and the actors.

We want our cake and eat it too. We want no commercials, we want streaming everything now, now, now, now, now, now. I wanna watch every episode of this show. And one night with no commercials, I pay 15, 17, whatever, $17 a month to do that. Right? Streamers do have commercials. Streaming services. How?

They just do like peacock has commercials. Netflix does it. I had to choose. You know what they do though? In Netflix. They have what? Start, they start with the thing. Nope. What I forget what show it was They just oh, they just oh you mean like everything the ads are all in there built in like man

I can't so they'll have yeah, they'll have they'll have a Ford truck symbol right on a page But it's they they use the lighting It's so brilliantly place that your eye goes there first. Sure, yeah, yeah. So the product placement is so epic now. You were sponsored by Skankfest. They exactly, but they would use the color correction

in post to make this just pop. So what is it like? Do you think the FBI is gonna come? It's really go to Skankfest pop. Oh, sure. Do you think the FBI is going to come? It's really go to skank fest. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So yeah, it's the right thing. Do you have commercial? Do you think the FBI is going to?

I want to see what show that is. The two just paranoid thieves. What's the DIA here you think? I figure, are you bugged? It was Pepsi. What's the show with Hulk? The one where the one where he was a navy seal type guy the incredible Hulk? No, not the Hulk the guy from not the Hulk the guy who plays the Hulk

What's his name? Ham's worth Ham's worth what that show that's fucking the Hulk is Mark Ruffalo. What's the show? What was the movie Help me you leave me fucking Three autistic guys you I love your description is like you know Iron Man. No, not not the guy What the movie the guy who shot as he odds board that guy with Mark Ruffalo. Oh, no Extraction not the whole extraction for I'm a piece of shit

I'm not just I'm not gonna look at that. Hey, look at that. I'm gonna give this to everybody. Hey guys, Robert Kelly here. I'm a hunk of dumb shit that gave the wrong reference. I said Hulk when I should have said Thor. That's okay. I apologize.

I'll do that. What was the show movie? Extraction? Extraction 2. Extraction 2. I think that was the show they had it in. Or Hulk 3, as they call it. That was that. Well, Hulk 3. Thor 6. All the show they had it in. Or Hulk 3, as they call it. That was that.

Well, Hulk 3. 4.6. All the strongest Avenger. Yeah. I don't know, man. Like look, it going on a picket line to me. Yeah. I feel like me being there's a waste of time.

Because I'm just going to complain. That's what I'm complaining. But complain focused on complaining. Where? To the towards the fuckers in the building extraction to you. Yeah You you bring that up now 75 times, you know what he's got Danny if Danny break Max's fingers It's it's that form of autism where everything's delayed. I mean it's nuts

You are shouting Hulk I'm gonna ask you were actually I mean, it's nuts. We literally just talk about it. I thought it was the Hulk, but like the first half of it. You were shouting Hulk. I'm gonna ask you. You were actually shouting. Hi everybody, I'm Robert Couting. I'm an asshole. The one with the Hulk for two and a half minutes. I suck.

I'm just saying, no, no, I'm with you. I do believe the fuckers up, like the people at the top can take a 60% pay-up and cut and still 60 or 40% they can make 60% of what they're making now and still make it a small amount. I'm on their side if it's 60. Yeah, I've seen them on a money doing jacks yet. They can they can fucking they can the Disney guy can be making

$10 million a year for doing basically nothing instead of 20 or whatever it is. I don't know how to say that. You could say that about every time. I know you can. But that's starting to become an issue. You're starting to see more and more the fucking wage gap. People are not going to be able to retire or die peacefully in the unions.

I think the, I think unions are good. Streaming ruined it, dude. Streaming ruined it. Streaming is the podcasting of we had movies that you paid to see. And then you watched that movie on TV with commercials. There was money being made the whole time. And that was fine. You sat through Scarface with a commercial

right when it gets good. And that's the price you pay to watch Scarface for free. It's not free. You're paying for it, the commercial. Now, everybody wants it whenever they want it, everything. Scarface for free. It's not free. Yeah, you're paying for it. The commercial now Everything everybody wants it whenever they wanted everything. Everything is available at anytime You can watch any movie anytime. Yeah pay a subscription. Yes. Here's what I say put commercials again I think TV ruined it. I think it should have stayed at movies. Just stayed at movies. No TV was the greatest. You got commercials

Dude TV you make more money on TV than you do be in a movie star movie star started going to TV Because you get a long order gig Vincent Afrio made 250 but if there was only movies no TV Then there just be more movies. Yeah, and they'd be more killing. There'd be more murders. What dude? Yeah, dude? You ever go to a movie? Yeah I'm still here. I'm still standing Bobby I'm gonna do much car face. Let's go stand it out You know that part has more Joe Pagy. Oh fucking. Oh, yeah, I'm trying to hey, I By Bobby Kelly you try to you fuck me. I can't do you got it. You got it. I can't go try to get a job Hey, Bobby Kelly

You fuck me You don't fucking fuck me, okay? I don't fuck you and no justice These fuck the writers get what Jesus Christ I just Apologize I think I was not holding that sign Wow, you just got fucking wow, bro. You just got you just got interned. You just got interned. Yo, he's taking talk and I just got interned. Yo, it's a tick with the dick on the top on the clock.

Oh shit, Bobby don't rock. He got a sock for the nickels. Gonna hit him in the deal pickle cause he lookin' like a silly hill, Billy. You fucking failed as soon as I stopped doing this. The beat was too good. Listen, man, I'll shine it. Movies.

You say what you say movie shine. I'm here. But here's what I'm saying. More violence. You, well, dude, you ever go to a fucking movie at all time and people talk, people loud, they yell shit out. They run the fucking movie. The reason why TV is good is because you can stay home,

what your family, and not have to have your life threatened, or be angry, or have to tell somebody to shut the fuck up. When you go see a movie, okay, you go see a big movie like Top Gun or whatever, when it came out, you go see that movie, you're saying, all right, I'm gonna take the hit on this if people talk, but I'm gonna go see this experience. It's an experience. I don't want to go see Rambo In a movie theater. I want to see that at home now. I guess maybe we just how chosen different movie theaters Okay, okay, I've never I've experienced young I've seen one fight break out, but it would I never felt threatened

Well, yeah, we hit where you from New Orleans, Louisiana Well, it's like that. Well, else what part of yonkers of New Orleans. So there's a lot of people there that should be talking I mean now Slidos maybe not the maybe maybe like the yonkers white planes area. Okay. Yeah, yeah Originally from the statin island of the shalmet the statin island of New Orleans look dude. Here's a thing I Love shit at movies. Okay, but you're a bossing guy, right? You're a bossing guy. I've seen people go, shot the fuck up, fuck you. But don't they make me?

They say that in when they're bad guys. I don't wanna deal with that. Yeah, I'll boss in people who are assholes. Yes we are. I don't think assholes don't think you're just, but I don't wanna deal with it. You've got a personality. When I choose to deal with that idea with,

but sometimes you just miss them. And TV's great because you got a season. Like I'm watching SE to deal with it. You've got a personality. When I choose to deal with that idea with it, but sometimes you just want to deal with it. And TV's great because you got a season. Like I'm watching SEAL team right now. I love it. It's a good show. It's a great show. You should be on it. SEAL team?

Yeah, not like as a SEAL, but as you used to be SEAL. I think as a SEAL. No. Well, I'm on it. Young me up, they're both being a SEAL team. Yeah, but in the water. SEAL team. We can be real SEALs that they fuck up. That bumping in the boat. We just, we're just SE. Yeah, but in the water. We can be real seals that they fuck. That bump into the boat.

We just, we're just seals that are in the Navy. No, they're in the water as they approach a boat. They're like, go. They're like, what's that? Just seals. And we're like, ooh. No, but you have that, you see. We're not Navy shields.

We're seals that are in the Navy. You do have that look, dude. You have that, uh. You should be a fucking, you look at that, you need to be special ops. You special ops look hey dude get the beard you got a strong feet manly features you think you have beautiful eyes cut everybody knows special ops knees them pretty blues dude you got that pretty how you gonna fucking to do service how you gonna seduce those Yeah, you're right get them all horny sort of blood goes I got a gun. I'm gonna be like it I got a gun I come up I know no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no Talk to dangerous content. Tick and talk missing now. Have no just. Hello, this is tick.

Let's talk. I please send money. Please. We'll do. We're going to do only fans. They're going to be at us. Tick is going to get his head chopped off tomorrow at noon. Yeah, dude, I look, man, I'm a 100% actor.

Behind the actors, 100% the writers. I just think man, I'm a hundred percent actors behind the actors, a hundred percent the writers. I just think that it's in a weird position. Back when they striked before, you had that money, there was money there, you know, where it's like, I don't know where that money is going to come from, because when you go to a streaming service, Netflix, people are people, it's spread out too much. It's almost like Patreon when it first came out, right? Everybody was making money.

But now everybody has a fucking Patreon. People can only spread themselves out so then. Sure, sure. But I'm saying like, but our streaming service is actually struggling. That's my question just because everybody's got all of them, or most of them. Yeah, they do, they get it? I got all of them, or had all of them.

I canceled all of them just cause it was like. People started to cancel Netflix. Yeah, but I'm saying like, I had every single fucking one. I was, and I was like, you know, too much money as a month, but I was using it. I was watching, she don't be a guy, I was watching, she's yellowstone, you watch that shit? Do I watch yellowstone?

Do you watch yellowstone? Of course I of course I do the succession for the 99% who are you who are you and Yellowstone? Who do you consider yourself? I want you know what's fucking funny, dude? The daughter I think I'm I think I'm Beth now I think I'm Beth I can't ride a horse and I just like to fuck No, um, you know what's fucking great. I don't I don't want to bitch you out of Beth But his bet is pretty bad ass. So if you really if you really think you're If you really think your bet is that is that real do you think your bet?

I mean, you know what out of all the characters I Asked people you're gonna say I know, you know what? Out of all the characters, I feel like I ask people you're gonna say. I know everyone's saying. What am I gonna say? Everyone's at the same thing. Your boy. Fuck. Hold up. Don't say. Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, the orphan, the one that the, the one that they rip.

Rip, rip. Everyone says they're rip. No, they don't. Everyone says they're rip. Everybody wants to be rip. I'm rip. Are you rip? I'm rip.

You're more of a Casey. I think you're more of a Casey. What? How dare you? What are you? How dare you? Casey beats the shit out of rip like eight times. Rip let Casey beat the shit out of him.

Yeah, because he's scared. He's scared to, no. He scared to, no. He did it for the father. He did the father asked him to do it I'll repeat the shit out everybody You know what fucking funny case. He don't fucking have shit on race. He's pretty bad at body He's bad ass, but he's not be he let him be his ass. I don't think he let him I think he said he let him my reality

Beat his ass. I don't eat let him I think he said he let him my reality Break up a taking talk no way this is what brings us back together It is this is how we're gonna. This is how we make our animal sounds this sounds At seal spotty seal sounds Rip rip rip is bad at rip is the baddest mother fucker on the show. Then comes Casey. Let's let Jamie. Jamie's an asshole. I mean, Jamie is such a worm and I feel bad.

You remember that? You don't you remember what he was in, his first thing he was ever in? He was in the American Beauty. American Beauty. He's the kid, he's the kid in American Beauty. What kid? The kid that gets fucked?

The kid with the fuck, who knows? the kid that gets fucked the kid with the We put up we put up a Buzzfeed quiz to decide which yellowstone character you are all right Which not family member from the outside are you I say I'm I say everyone says rip. All right. All right Who do you say Beth you say Beth okay? I just want to see what straight describes you best Bobby come up fierce I'll say fierce. What are you? All right. I'm I'm first.

I'm driven. Okay. Wait, I'd say I'm okay. I say emotional. I'll say emotional. How would you deal with failure? Hang on a second, become become rebellion, being close-minded, take authority, become motivated, become motivated.

Okay. How will your enemies describe you? Stubborn, blunt, spiritual, I'd say blunt. I'm a blunt guy, right? And which profession best suits your interests? Politician lawyer, I'd say, I'd say rancher. There we go. Okay, who am I? John Dutton. I'm the fucking man. Wait, can I try? I'm Papa D. Can we reload it?

Yeah, of course we can. Let's go back. I hope you're a day player. I hope you're a day player. I want to be the one like, the guy who sings and gets pussy, but they wanna kill him. Oh, that guy?

He's a real, he's a real singer too. Outgoing. They didn't kill him by the way. Wait, what's the script? I'll read him to you. Which trait best describes you when you're given a goal? Driven, logical, emotional, or control?

Driven. Driven, bang. He's gonna just gonna pick what I picked. The come of it the come what you deal with how would you deal with failure become a mode Motivate mode of it against me. It's just too done. How would you describe you stubborn blunt spiritual aminepular spiritual I'd say manipulative, but go ahead I and and which profession best suit you psychologist, okay, here we go you are That's for you I do this for you dad Everything I do is for you daddy. Yeah, she's so fucking angry. I love it. Yeah, it's burnt And she's like give me a cigarette bitch. She's not English. She's not on the show

She is English in life, but not on the show. She is English in life But not on the show. I'm fucking bad nobody would buy that That is fucking sass I'll tell you you want a little little inside info on that show, but remember the show where she got raped Yeah, wait remember the episode when she got raped he was gonna rape her Who's gonna rape? Oh the guy who beat the shit out of it? Yeah, I remember he's gonna with the mask and then who rip comes in and fucking Rip comes in up. Yeah, but they never take the mask off. Yeah, was it you know, you know that was who Dominic Lambert dosi

The the pause that you just had made it look like you were making that name up. No bring it up Dominic Lambert. You know him from from entourage from he was in, he's been in everything. He's in everything. Wait, was he the sidekick in entourage, the one who just a ball guy? Folks, we, oh, he was in, he's been in air. He was in the wire. He was, he was in the wire. He's been the wire entourage.

He was in, um, why didn't they take the mask off? He said they called up this little inside scoop. Okay. They, she said, I'm not being raped by a day player. I'm not letting some guy, oh, I need to be raped. This, this scene needs to happen because it's so intense. Right. And it's so fucked up.

I need, it needs to be done by a professional actor that I trust. So, so the guy Taylor called up the man who's unbelievable actor and he says, I need you to do this because I'll do it, but you leave the mask on and I don't want to be in the credits as that guy. You can put me in the, I don't want to be, I don't, they can't know it's me.

That is such a good question. And at the end, the guy is dangling naked, right? When he killed them. Yeah. That's not him. He goes, whoever that, that's going to be a day player. That I'm not dangling with my shtemake out. I will come in and do the scene with her and do it. Let me, yeah, there he is. That is a dominant. Yeah. Not about those. He is, first of all, insane. I love him. Oh, yeah. And look at his base been in everything Oh, he's toss a king now Toss a king now wire who's it but Bronx tail He was also what else was it he was in the he walks it on the mayor getting his dick sucked in the watch go back to the stuff

He was on your piece of shit Sorry, I didn't mean to talk like he is. He is. He is that sort of like high pitch tough guy voice. Like it's like high pitch, but still scary at the same time. That's him. Yeah. He'll bite you fucking hell bite your face. But that's actually the Irishman. That's the other way. He's great. That Tony Salero. Oh, there's that Tony Salero. Yeah, dude. Holy shit. Dude. He he he's a legit dude lives up in Westchester. All right. Legit motherfucking bad, but he is great and he and if you watch that scene man it's one of the most intense scenes of Yellowstone. Yes, sure.

Because she is such a ballsy. Oh yeah. I mean she's the best. And Taylor. No this I am. Hella Sheridan. Yeah. That's why I am.

I'm Beth. You're tougher than me. You come with me where you know no day plays don't come. Can I be day players? I mean I was pros only. Can I be can I be Beth. You're tougher than me. You come with me where you, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, dude, fuck him. What a fine, I do. We should trick people into taking this test and being Jamie. I bet I'll, let's go. I guarantee one of these fucking odds, a Jamie. Let's go back. Oh, dude, we got, I want you to take the thing. We got three, we got three cases over here.

I'm gonna take no cases. Let's go back, ready? Max, you ready? Yeah, here we go. All right, well, actually, let's take Danny, take it first. Which, which trait describes you the best? Fear's competitive outgoing or compassionate. Compassionate.

Okay, compassionate. Here we go. Which trait best describes you when you're given a goal? Driven logical emotion, look controlling. Logical. Logical, as the autism kicking in. How would you deal with failure? Become motivated, become motivated,

become rebellious, take authority of being close-minded. Close-minded. Great. Oh my God. How would your enemy describe you stubborn, blunt, spiritual, and manipulative? Stubborn. Stubborn.

Bang. And which profession best suits your interest? Lawyer. Lawyer, lawyer, politician, rancher, or peep show mop boy. I would say psychologist. Psychologist, okay, there we go. There we go, you are. John as well.

Fuck that. There's no way, this, this is rigged. No way me and him are John. I'm, I, I don't want it. I can't even tell a difference between you guys anymore. Bobby, what are you doing over here? What, what are you, I can't tell anymore. You guys do look like each other's looper.

I fear since it max you're taking it down. All right. All right, you somebody else read it. You read it. Which trait describes you best? You just say it. Also competitive. All right, here we go.

Competit. Which trait best describes you when you give it a goal? Uh, driven. Driven. Alright, go for it. What do you think you are? How would you deal with failure? Uh, being close minded. Being close.

What hang yourself? That's close minded. You know, it's also close. Alright, body. How would you admit it's a grab you small little. Manipulina. Manipulina. Manipulina.

Manipulina. Which profession best suits your interest lawyer? Okay. Alright, no wait,ipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula.

Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula.

Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula.

Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula. Manipula.�. Manipula you the best? Mm-hmm. Compassion. Competitive. Competitive. Really? I don't get that. You just because you say it that way. When you're given a goal best. Controlling. Okay. Yeah. Failure. What do you do? How do you deal with it? I like that you simplify failure. What do you do? Close minded that's what you don't right do you good now do this one enemies what do they think you Blunt blunt yeah roll them up you know more like what are you doing what are you doing for 11? What are you doing?

Get the fuck out of here. You Yeah, I've never seen the show. Oh, that's even better. Of course you have it. Damn, dude. Because you're a bore. That fucking actor was in American Beauty, the kid who was like, look at the dancing bag and like the...

He was also in that... The bag is beautiful. What's that movie? Ah, shit. It was a superhero movie. The Hulk? No. The one with the door and the Hulk at the same time.

Come on, guy, I have three nerves here. What is it? And they leave me hanging in there. Batman, but it's Superman, but he's also the Hulk. It was the one. Iron Man as well. Oh shit, not the Avengers though. It was a superhero movie with the, with the Hulk guy.

Remember, the guy had like, come on! If there was a way, superhero movie! There was a way to turn bad explanations into renewable energy. You would fucking save the planet. What the movie was it? It was... The guy who played Jamie? Yeah, Jamie played. He was in a superhero movie. Fuck me!

Come on, it was the... Underworld, away. No. Jonah Hex. If I'm seeing like Ghost Rider, I'm pretty good. No, keep going. Adjacent movie.

You guys suck. But, I mean, that's IMDB though. Maybe you know what? I'm sorry, I was a wrong guy. Yeah. I mean, it was a absolutely wrong guy. He was not in that movie. He was not that any of that. I would, you was a absolutely wrong guy. Who's nodding that movie? He was nodding that idea of that. Oh, and you need to become a fucking like a

Cisco and Ebert movie reviewer. Hey, Robert Kelly, this movie sucks, oh shit, different movie. Yeah, last minute. Ah, fuck, rock movie. It's another TikTok thing. TikTok, TikTok, TikTok movie reviews. I ain't seen none of them.

He forgets what they are. So, so you're from New Orleans. Yes. Now I gave, now I went to New Orleans a couple times. Sure. And, yeah, they're for orgasm. Yep, with different orgasm. And I swear to God, the food sucked. Damn. And I told Mark Norman this years ago. Yeah. I sat right over there. He was on the show. You had a town. Everybody gives you a town, a food, and then I go, it sucked a bag of shit.

Damn. I go, I went and you had your dumb gumbo. I was threw up. Dumbbo. Dumbbo, what's the other one? Jumbalaya. Jumbalaya boo. At two fey.

At two fuck you. Damn. I mean, I hated it. And he was like, well, I don't know. He should go out and get a gun. What do you mean? No, no, no. I mean, I hated it. And he was like, well, I don't know. He should go out and get a gun. What do you mean? What do you mean?

It's good food, who knows? I don't know. I'm gay, who knows, fat. And he goes, he's tried again. And I went back with Nick the Polly, we had a gig. And I was like, I'm gonna go try this food again. And this is when kind of Yelp was around, so you could find a good place.

And apparently I just went to, on that stupid street. I probably went to the dog shit places. I went to all dog shit places. And the second, that last time I went back, I got it. I had Jumbalaya and I had Gumball knocked my tits off. It was like a brown gold sauce. The first time I had it was like a broth. Yeah, like a broth. This one was like time I had it was like a broth. Yeah, like a broth.

This one was like, I don't know like the roux. You got him. The roux. Darken the roux. That's true, that roux till it's fucking caramel brown. I don't get pornographic. Oh, bro. I can't help it.

Do you know how to make a roux? Absolutely. You do? I make a, all right gumbo. I'm making all right gumbo. Now, you grew up like in the city type or in the... My dad and my family is a catering company, catering business.

So I grew up fucking working in food, basically. Down there. Yeah, so on weekends, till I was, till I was in my, on weekends forever, but then I was a high school dropout and a fuck up for a while. And then when I started doing stand up, I worked for my dad, for the family company,

for when I was like 10 on weekends and shit until I was like 27, till Katrina, till like 27. Oh, you were down there for Katrina. Yeah. How bad was it? That's fucking, you know, it's crazy. I mean, I got out in time. I got out before the storm actually made landfall, but it was fucking nuts, but you just kind of,

you got used to it. You know, you had to go back, was everything gone? Yeah. Everything. My apartment was on the second floor. If you know the city, I lived on the corner of Ferret and Sonye. I don't know what's there now,

but that entire area is nicer now, but I lived upstairs. And so I didn't, the water didn't get into my apartment, but the mold didn it. So that's it was crazy. Yeah, yeah, really the black mold. It was like a greenish dark green dark green. Right. Slightly black. Slightly black dark green. Like the like the Philadelphia Eagles when they went there with their black all black. I don't know if I can. I don't know. Where the black quarterback? No, no, no, no, no, When they make that, when they do the black,

they do all black. All the black outfits. Oh yeah. The outside, outside. The outside, just you. I thought you met the team. No, no, no. But the, how about your family?

Well, you've got my parents. I was got a foot of water, but it was like, you know, how does it all the ground, but it was enough to have to like, got the whole downstairs. My dad was like, you know, how it's off the ground, but it was enough to have to like, got the whole downstairs. My dad was like, and still is like an insurance lunatic. So he was insured out the ass. Really?

And so they did all right, but it took some like, yeah, but like for the most part, people lost shit, but you know, where did you go? People. So my sister at the time lived in Baton Rouge, which is like an hour northwest, hour and half northwest, she was in college. So we all just want to live with her. We're gonna have a fucking two bedroom. Whole family.

Pretty much. How many people in your family? Six. Six people lived in a two bedroom. And then we were able to get back closer to the city, my family and then my uncle. And so like two other families. So basically, 18 of us, almost 18,

around 15 to 18 lived in this venue that my family has like a catering company venue and we lived in that for a while because it was an old house turned into like a wedding venue. So we lived there. Yeah, how shit was weird? Was it weird or fun? It was fun, but it was also like,

I mean, you know, practical shit, like just wanting to stay up late and everybody, the whole fucking everybody's asleep and it's an old house, so every move you make resonates throughout the entire house, then like electricity's not on all the time in certain parts of the town, so you can't just wander around, there's nothing really to do masturbating as I have a question, because there's two bathrooms and someone's always in one. Right, you can't jerk off. town, so you can't just wander around. There's nothing really to do. Master baiting is out of the question. Cause there's two bathrooms and someone's always in one. Right, you can't jerk off. Yeah, and you forget, you know, when you're a fucking

25 year old, 26 year old, you're like, ah, you know, you're hilarious. And literally your family is devastated. You're like, I mean, I couldn't even masturbate. I mean, how is that even on that? That's how you, I mean, come on, dude, dude. And when you're at a certain point, whenever you're faced with hard times, Todo empieza con un paso. En Sanita, Puyimos los primeros en ofrecerte video consulta con tu médico de siempre. Hola. Con programas especializados.

Otro paso, cuida tu mente. Y otro, ficio digital. Cada año queremos que disfrutes de la asistencia médica presencial y digital que mereces. Dal paso a Sanitas y disfruta ahora de bluayud durante un año gratis. Pulsan el banner para saber más. 3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno. Esta es la 3 por uno señal, que significa que ya puedes aprovechar tu en el 3 por uno en medianas al homicidio solo pidiendo el line.

¿Saparao? 3 por uno, tres por uno. Oh, no, no, no, no. Dominos pizza. Um, I just think that, yeah, but I come from food. That is to answer your question. Yeah, you come from food. Now, but when this thing happened, yeah, down there, did you know anybody that died in

it? In Katrina. I don't know. I don't know anybody who directly like died as a result of it. Well, that's not okay. I mean, this fuck. So my grandma, who was in a home who had severe Alzheimer's at the time, she died during the storm, during like the evacuation process.

We couldn't get to her in time or get anywhere near that where she was in a home. So they evacuated all the residents and she died during that. On the evacuationuated all the residents and she died during that. On the evacuation. During the evacuation process and we didn't find out like three weeks. How did you find out you flowed out of your house? Yeah, basically they sent her.

Yeah, they heard her say she's just they sent her in a canoe. Yeah, it's like, yeah, fuck it. She I think she came from these coordinates and they had a fucking little gator, a trained alligator swim. That's not what happened. I know, I know, I know. No, okay, no. They finally got to talk to my dad. I know. I know. I know. Okay. No. They finally got to my suck. Yeah, because the thing that was super fucked up, but she was dead. And they had a creamator.

They had to because they can't have the body. Yeah. So the place to put it. All electricity. No freezers. So by the time my dad was like a notified that his mom was dead. It was like, oh, it was the urn. So like, damn it. Yeah. Yeah. But that was it was also one of those things where she'd been you know if you if you have a relative That's it all time as you know at a certain point. It's like certain point where it's like, you know what I miss you But it's time to go better, you know, you're in a better place. Oh, yeah, it's a certain point like you're so taxing on this family It's just you know every every fucking other day. How much tap you look? Oh God We got a parking that's stupid lot walk through the That home with people trying to grab you like the evil dead young people. Where are you from? God damn it. You know where I'm from. Some Haitian lady throwing fucking jello in your grandma's face. That's what that is. Like cattle.

That's so now. But yeah. So when this Yeah, that's pretty wild that you were in that. Yeah, it was wild It was like a but it was such a wild thing You kind of react like a dog you want a dog it's injured You know how they like they like oh this sucks and then immediately just accept it. That's their new reality Yeah, that's kind of what happened. That's how I felt like when you went back to the city though I mean it was fucking chaos. Yeah, It was wild. I mean, no. The media was making it seem like it was pure bedroom. Yeah, fucked up shit was happening,

but you were getting reports that were like, the prisoners of Orleans, parish prison of escaped, and taken an entire neighborhood hostage. Yeah. They've come and deer to helicopter from a local news. Right. Like, no, that didn't happen. And then like, you were hearing reports of just like roving gangs of murderers. Yeah. And it was like, no, yes, there was

people and like looting, but it wasn't even looting. It was people breaking in to get supplies to be fucking able to live. It was. And so it was a lot. The media made it seem. It was, I'm not saying it was good. Right. It was bad. But it was, but it wasn't, it wasn't, it wasn't I'm not saying it was good, but it was, but it was, it wasn't, it wasn't, uh, walking dead. No, it was, but it was fucked up. Still, yeah. But, but time we were able to even get back in the city because you guys have to do all the work to your house. So, yeah, you had a, you had a gutted and that's what I did for months. We're just gutting houses. Just like you'd go, people make, get their FEMA money. They just pay, you know, I work. So you had to do construction?

Yeah, decently. I know how to go to a house, that's anti-cats. Just take it, just rip shit out. Just the other way around. It's fuck, it's just rip shit out. That was actually, I mean, you find yourself, you and your, you know, three buddies, you all, y'all get high and fucking blast the radio

and just go to town. Yeah. There were times where you're just like, hey, oh, fuck, this wall was wet enough and it didn't, it wasn't insulated. So let's dive through it. And then you just have the run and dive through the wall and that's part of the job. Right.

You had to take the fucking house out to the studs. Yeah. You know, I'm saying so you're just fucking you go in, you drag all the fucking furniture out and anything. That was a thing. The owner had one pass. They'd come, they'd take a pass and sometimes that pass could be an entire day, but they got everything of value out of there.

And once they signed off on like, all right, we got everything we wanted. Your job was to get everything out of there in a certain time, and anything you found was yours. Really? If they left anything behind. The only thing we found was like, one dude left like, and it was like two of those

Ziploc gallon bags full of 50 cent pieces. That dude left like like and it was like two of those ziploc Gallon bags full of 50 cent pieces. That's great. Yeah, it was awesome full What an asshole That's a lot of money and I bet you some of those are worth split it up We we fucking got a guy finally brought to a bank. Wow. Road is all checks. It was it was What was it? I mean he kept the lion's share but it's like we each got like an extra 500 or something. It was great That's awesome and then it was like, you know, you found tons of tons of porn Jesus Christ the amount of porn you just found that people like I like like dad porn You know, and then like good point good porn One gun we found one shotgun, but it was definitely just water damage the point of like you probably couldn't use it

But you're getting in there. You're ripping shit out and you're ripping the walls down You're ripping the floor up. You're taking a sealant out. You're pulling every fucking nail You're just down to the studs down to the studs and then they will come in and build it Yeah, and it would take you a homes back in the old days the homes down there didn't have Like insulation and shit right? No, they did, but it was just they were so damaged already It's right. Yeah, I'm fucking town now cuz I now I, now have you ever, like, I think in New Orleans, I think a swaps, alligators. That's all like 30 minutes outside.

But you didn't live in any of that shit. Now, I live close to it. I mean, did you go on the swaps? Yeah, I've been a swamp. I mean, but only like, swaps aren't that crazy. If you have a swim in them? No, fuck no, dude. You know, no.

Where do you go swimming in there? In New Orleans? In New Orleans. And he ponds. He can't go on a pond. You can't, if you find, I don't, you swimming lake, swimming lake, montrain, but there's alligators. No, not in the lake. Really?

No. Sure. Shallow fucking freshwater lake. I mean, there probably are, but not. See, if there's a probably, I ain't going. No, I'm gonna stand that. But the gait, there alligators are territorial and terrified. So like, there's a... Terrified, you're making... Yeah. Territory, I think you have there. Now understand that but but gate their alligators are territorial and terrified

So like terrified you're making yeah territory. I think you have that right I think you read that wrong. I think they have a territory and they're terrifying is what you're saying no They're terrified I'm so sick of you southerners dude trying to trick us Yankees in the fucking again pet alligators I was down there. Yeah with fucking what's his name from the comedy club down there or Hulk Lafayette comedy club Jason. Yes Jason. Jason P. Leonard. Shut up. What's up, son? Peace Tik Tok loves you, but that's deep. That's deep. That's deep. That's it. Deep down that fuck it took me up to the thing and we're walking this an alligator and I pull over and he's like I was like can I use it yeah walk up and they have more scared of you than them think tried to fucking take me into the ocean

I mean to the lake they're not a lake or an ocean try to take me in the swamp I mean did you fucking walk up and try and smack it on the head walked up and said hi Did they like to get me? God but you got but you got away That then you look you Bobby you're known for a lot of things like to get me. God, but you got away. That, that's, look, you, Bobby, you're known for a lot of things. Nimble isn't one of them.

And you got away from that fucking gator, okay? You all right? I'm not nimble. Like rip, it let you go. It let you in. No, do gators are, I mean, I'm not saying go fucking fuck with a 12 footer, but like, if you see like a baby in the, you can grab the babies right out.

You're a Mental dude. I've been on so I Was with you see you spotlight them, okay, you spotlight them You see the baby's eyes and they're kind of like deers, okay, so they'll just stare into the light because they're stupid Well, they're just they don't know what the fuck it is. They're dumb. I'm saying it. Okay, alligator's you dog Is your not that smart? Sorry stupid and get into run cuz yeah You're a dumb small brain Delgado Community College your fucks your brains the size of a quarter dumb dumb's right You can grab them right out of the water while they're distracted pull them on the boat duck-a-pear mouth shot with the babies Right then you bring them back to the house you can do that with children in Indonesia. Did you know that?

I mean yeah, that spotlight them you could them back to the house? You can do that with children in Indonesia. Did you know that? Yeah, that spot light them. You could have done that during the floods. I'm sorry, that's terrible. Guys, don't talk. Don't talk. But no, don't talk. We hear you. I thought you guys left.

Daniel is yaps in the background. Like, he's in a real studio. We're in a fucking living room above the comedy cello stupid texted him. The first studio. Uh, the first one. The first one. What? Yes, skaters are not as dangerous.

You miss down there. Do you like it up there? I love it up there. I love it down there at a pee. I was just there for a while. You like that. Can I tell you something? You can tell me where you want.

I feel like you're kind of a ruckus type of guy. Ruckus? You like a nice ruckus. You go in, get drunk, fucking blah, blah, blah, maybe get into a couple fights, and you're all right with that. I mean, I like, I don't like, I don't like ruckus, I don't like fighting as shit. I like, I just like, the mild chaos of the night.

You wouldn't even be part of that. I like, I like being, like, that's, New Orleans has like a European vibe to it. Which sort of New York. I like just like rambling into the night, meeting some people, talking some shit, telling the joke, doing a riff, getting laid, getting not laid, drinking some more, making a new,

I like like the, and New Orleans is perfect for that. Just going out into it and just being like, fuck it and you meet new people and it's a global city. So you meet travelers all the fucking time. You meet, you know, people who move, people move there still, which is crazy, but they do. I only say that because it's, I don't know what the industry in the city is,

even really anymore. Oh, here's the video, put your headphones on. This is rewind that, rewind the video. Okay, here's me with Jason, you're on the fucker. Okay, oh shit, yeah, attacked by an alligator. And first, all right, here we go, play it. Man, you look like an albino dude in the sunlight. Like that, it's pretty interesting.

Play the sound. I'll pose next to it. Pose next to it, get a little closer, man. Come on, man. I mean, that's a big one, dude. Is it? No. Oh, fuck, no, the bad's not, I'll fucking.

OK. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Nimble my ass. Look at that. I got a fucking speech, you zah. Dude, you dude.

Look how far away he is. Shit. Shit, dude. That Cux. Look how far away he is. Shit dude. That cuck's like his laughin' his ass off. You stupid Southerners love this shit. I mean he knew. He definitely. Probably. No.

Scared the shit out of me. He, but Jason's also trained. You know he's trained. You know he's fucking past, right? Past what? He's an alligator wrangler. He's trained in that shit. I am so mad, right?

Not me, that up, I'm gonna be the problem. We love her, no. Tick, talk, tick, talk. No, he fucking, not, dude. But the rule is right now is not safe. I mean, it's, look at me. It's like any city. No, it's not.

It's not. You get taken advantage. Boston, you won't get taken advantage. I don't know, dude. You've been a Southie, you've ever seen the wire. South is rich now. And the wires, not the wire. That's all that's the wire.

You ever seen a town, bro? That people robbing banks. I know, that's just that. I know, I know. Listen, what I'm saying to you, the world's has never been safe. Yeah, but there was a time where it was very touristy.

It is still that. Yeah, dude, let me say don't even hang out at night. That's bullshit. That's bullshit. They say don't even go out at night. I was just there for two weeks straight shooting something at night every what were you shooting of comedy special thing for you. Yeah you're special another like it yeah leading into another special it's been a year and a half I'm sorry I didn't know you were fucking Louisie but I'm trying to like no I'm I apologize I'm soon shooting to different. Oh I apologize. Shepelle I know you were fucking Louisie, but I'm trying to like no I'm Paul I apologize. I'm soon shooting

So are we apologize Chepell I know you do every six months. I'm it's it's not I'm still doing the thing I haven't done the actual material yet, but we were shooting like a fucking Promotive thing, but anyway we're out there. No, that's not Like any place they tell you not to be out at night. Yes, you use your fucking head and avoid certain parts. Vegas you can be out at night. Los Angeles can be out at night. New York, you can be out at night. They tell you not to be out at night. Here, it's bullshit. New York, you can be out at night. But it's not I almost got stabbed a month ago. Yeah. There's another guy got stabbed the other day on the train. That happens. What's his name? Got a tattoo. Almost got mugged. Justin Silver got almost mugged in front of his house. Well, that guy, come on, don't,

but that guy's muggable. He's gorgeous. You see that guy? And you're like, if you mean muggable, slowly soft-kissing him in a silk bed, yes, he is muggable. It's crazy that he's in his 60s. Yeah, it's weird. It's weird that he's weird.

It's weird that he's spread the rumor. He's 66 years old that guy. He's been rubbing, uh, uh, kidges on his face. Nah, yeah, of dogs, puppy jizz. Puppy jizz on his face. Yeah, when I say kids, I mean, to get a kid's of puppies, child, child, child puppies,

child puppies, uh, Big puppy jizz, puppy jizz. And he drinks it, like Rocky and Rocky. And then he goes down and laugh, and he lets the gators come at him.

And the fear, he keeps the fear, and then he goes down and left he had he lets the gators come at him. And the fear keeps him here. Yeah, the hits his bloodstream. Yeah, hits his shock proteins. You anywhere you got to be you got it. Yes, you can't go certain places at night. I don't listen Sean, stop defending your dog. I'm going to defend it. It's a dangerous place.

It's a day and it's more dangerous now because the cops. Because the cops aren't doing shit. Yeah. Yeah, I went's more dangerous now because the cops because the cops aren't doing shit. You mean? Yeah. Yeah. I went to I went there for the Patriots Super Bowl. We had a fly in there when they played in Houston. We had a fly into we spent one night and New Orleans down on the main drag there, right? What's it called? Bourbon's. Bourbon Street. And at a certain point, the police came down to shut it down. And there was no shit given. When you get the fuck off, it's always been the case.

Not anymore. What? They ain't doing that shit now. People get robbed. I mean, people get, you get robbed when you, when you, I'm sorry, when you, when you, when you don't need your fucking head. I'm, yes, there are cases where it happens. It's worse than it's always worse than it's been in a long time Can you agree to that? It's worse than it's been a long time. Yes, but it's not it's not this like you're saying don't go to New Orleans No, I'm saying go to New Orleans. You're saying don't go

Definitely you just said it's more dangerous than it's ever been so if you're a stay home in pushy stay home Yeah, but if you're a human being that loves his family stay home. No, no, get out. Get out. And fuck the writers and don't be afraid of anything. You love to support the writers. Stream everything. Stream your fear bullshit. No, great, dude. Well, yeah, your special came out. It did. I saw you and you and Chey won up going on all these shows together Well, we went on we did it tonight. Yeah, it's crazy. It was crazy. There's a couple other things Yeah, now we just did it's not you would need a podcast together. No. No. Oh, all right I made that up. Yeah, but yeah now what you're going on now going on with him. Yeah

Because you know, Louis did my special right and I think it's great when somebody picked somebody else up It's just hey guy. I got a little heat right now. Let me help you. I think that's awesome. And she, one of my favorite people in the business, even knowing never invites me and anything has never done nothing for my career. I mean, I literally had him on the podcast when he was nobody before us and now, what the same right now he's coming up to pay us.

This is bad. This could be bad. Should I? People do come up here. Really? I don't know who it is. It's got to be so many important. Hey, headliner nationally or above. I don't want a feature.

If they're headlining on Thursday, they can't come up. Album at the door. She seems like, oh, she's a delivery guy. But that guy's probably like, well, I do comedy now. I'm coming up here to be a podcast.

If you headlining on Thursdays and feature on Saturdayss you can't come up Who is it? Oh? Shit, I said no, I don't want feature acts for Bert no bird feature acts Yeah, grab that you in the gonna squeeze in that's a that's a plug. That's a plug. Oh shit. You fucking what? Oh, you got to go No, no, I ain't got nowhere. Um, already said I put him in the middle. You wanted to go out drinking. I'll just dancing. I'll just sit right here. I don't want to nobody wants to see a dick anymore. It's too old.

We like everyone seen it. Everybody seen it. Everyone seen it by now. You got it. Hi, buddy. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not.

I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not.

I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not.

I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I did. I learned Kung Fu as a response to this black history month. Oh no, it's gays. Yeah, it's gays. June. Oh, June, gay month. What are you doing? June, bro, this hanging out. He was just telling me how not to go to New Orleans. It's too dangerous. I was saying that. I was saying that. And the right of strikers bullshit, they should keep with a, they should be lucky for what they get. He was telling me that Thor was the Hulk. So they said Thor became the Hulk. Yeah. That was the saying. It was I did have someone outside for Champagne's wedding. Someone

outside my my wedding is screaming. His wedding for Normans. Yeah. Go on. You're about to find out. You're about to find out. We'll to find out will come find out for like 10 minutes now what the fuck they find out I don't think they did You are you ready to die tonight? Yeah, those are two different completely different. That was that was that was his wife Saying that you're ready to find out tell him yeah, I mean that's that fuck yeah. Yeah, there's dangerous shit It's just avoid the stupidity people keep the York you the same as anywhere. Oh, New York is bad too What it's not what it was 10 years ago, but it's terrible safer. It's not safer safer safer. No, it's not I spent every

40 yeah 40 yes, but not 40 year old burly white guy with a beard. It's fine. No, yeah, it's fine. No, it's not The old burly white guy with a beard, it's fine. No. Yeah, it's fine. No, it's not. What do you live? I live in Westchester. It's just this block, bro. Yeah, it's one of the world's like,

this is the worst block to where Rogan opened his club in the world. I mean, Rogan opened his fucking, in that block and that. Rogan opened his fucking, in Fallujah. I mean, you've run. I take my watch off. I took my Louis Vuitton bag

and put it in another bag. It's such a beautiful, and just like Gucci bag. It's a great experience. I'm like, ah, 40 year old bachelor at party. And it's funny because you go in at night and it's bad. When you come out after the second show,

it's really bad. Are we talking about downstairs or an office? No, we're talking about an office. Oh, yeah. I mean, socks. You got the same guy. Looney ticks out here, bro. And here's what problem sucks, too. Is they took away the parking spots

with these stupid outdoor restaurants that nobody does. They got to get rid of them. Jews get that in. Shurs now. There's this much. There's this much space between you. Oh, yeah.

Now you're funneled in. You're running the gauntlet every time. You can't pretend to just have almost cross the you're funneled in. You're running the gauntlet every time. You can't pretend to just have almost cross the street that come back. You can't. Oh, they said that. If you do late night spots downstairs,

there's the guy who's in the wheelchair, but I don't know if he's actually needs that wheelchair. No, he is. He's with his legs, so far. But he just positions himself perfectly to where you, if you're coming out as an audience member, you have to interact with him. Yeah.

Well, sometimes he sits over by the ATM. Oh, yeah. Over there. So you go in there and you're like, fuck. You have any extra money. I see you here. Yeah, but I got one easy. Yeah, that'll do.

Yeah, I like the guy who positions himself where he throws himself onto the street and screams in pain. And the only way he'll get out of the street to make cars go is if you give him a dollar. I like track. I like the guy who hits napkin balls with a golf club. I got money. And he's just normal though. I think he's like the most normal guy.

I like trash bag lady. She's in midtown. She lies in the corner. Go above 23. She just has a trash bag on. Oh really? Nothing else. She's naked.

She's just trash bag. So she lies there and goes, eh. And it's horrific. The site. What does she want? She wants money. An attention probably. She wants money.

She gets money. So people just give her money. And the more she, the more she, just lies there like she's dying. Dude, it's like 100%. I want to stay. I've never had the ability to stay until she's off her shift. It's just she gets relieved. Where she of she thinks someone else takes over that spot

All right, first of all, the homeless used to be if she's lying if she's lying there. Yeah paralyzed in a trash bag She'd be there the next day at some point. She has to just go all right Sally a seat tomorrow. Yeah, have a great day. I'm gonna go Starbucks, you want anything? I got my app, I'm good. The sir, oh, actually, I gotta go to work.

Yeah. No, I remember there used to be this guy who'd ride the L who just had a fucking saxophone and would come on and be like, and just play crazy, she'd be like, people of earth, my spaceship is crash landed here in Brooklyn, New York. I will need money for parts. Please give them to me the money now.

And he'll be playing and love it. And it was like, okay, I'll give you a fuck. We're having fun with the fuck. Yeah, the guy down here, Westforth, just playing a snare drum. Duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, a guy on the West, yeah, that guy'd go into the subway and there was talented people performing in the subway. Like when American Idol was big, you go down there, there was dancers, I remember one time when it went down there, they would, what?

It was the lobe. It was from the subway. I went down the water, there was Spanish dancers doing like this amazing dance and everybody stopped and it was awesome. There was like some, yes. There was like, I think some Israeli or some violin player who like, would world renowned. Not anymore because you would go down there

and just play just to see if people would notice who he was. Yeah, you get killed. That's a violin, it's not that popular. Yeah. You know what I do with that? You know what I do with that drummer guy? In my head I imagine like I'm in a scene, in like an action film

Yeah, and that's the fucking track the soundtrack and I imagine just fucking just fucking up everybody who's a terrorist or a spy Just keep cutting back to him just keep cutting back to him and it gets louder and louder and fast Stop writing stop writing. Oh, sorry strike strike you solidarity nuts. Solidarity going on the picket line tomorrow Oh, he wrote you wrote you wrote a scene You wrote a scene with this is The question this is this is tick give me the side rock. What? Tick and time. I'm not holding the fucking side all the side. I'm not holding up. I'm not holding on I don't acknowledge that sign you wrote that side

Listen writers. I hope you get the money you need to feed your family and with that food and with that well being please write something original this next decade stop writing ghost busters seven with women uh... that's not to be good will just that's all that that's all exact i think that's exactly make that we want the line to do we want this

did you hear that all sex and study always sucked the trees that the writers are Using to shade themselves in the sun in the picket line that the execs had had them trim it Really so they couldn't be out there. So there's no shade so the sun was just baking them up That's so great. I mean what a hunk of shit. That's guy He looked out the window. Don't trim tree. And some guy had to go out, okay, both. And, I was just some hot day player,

sweating his fucking head off. You knew it was picketing, so one, photo ops, and two, the one, I picketed for the commercial strike before I was in the sag. They said if you pick it

and you get 40 hours of picketing, we'll give you a sad card. So half those people, I'd say 90% of them are not even in the sag, they said if you pick it and you get 40 hours of picketing, we'll give you a sad card. So half those people, I'd say 90% of them are not even in the unions. But they're trying to get in. They're trying to get in, but they're just like, we'll fill it with fakes. These guys came to write.

Some of them are Latino. Do they have, if they want, they have crafty setup. Ooh. No crafty. Crafty setup for the picket. If they offered me something to pick it, like the writers would like,

look, we'll give you, if you pick it 40 hours, we'll give you... Ozorati. No, I don't want to, no, no, no, no, no,otti? I live in New York. I would sell the Mazzarotti immediately. And then I just give me the money. I'm not gonna lie. Now I got a job. I got to go become a car salesman

because you're an asshole and get picked a good gift. I would say give it away to the insurance. Siders Guild insurance for five years. Oh, I love that. It's the best. It is the best insurance. Really? Riders Guild, do dental.

Yeah. Oh my God, smash on my teeth out and just get new teeth like Jay. Every two, every two weeks. Yeah. Remember the Netflix did their show, their six person show and then they cut all your money and then they, you go, can we just get 7,000 more so we can get insurance the next two years and they go, no.

We, they gave, here's the problem. Just seven, here's more. They gave everybody's insurance. Everybody the year before got a hundred thousand each. And they got twenty twenty twenty. For what the half hours for twenty nine, don't twenty five. Twenty five. For that's like half hours. No, they did. They did it down to fifteen. But they were like, and then we thirty two. We'll just have insurance thirty two thousand. We all get insurance just to have the insurance for the year. And they and and be cut first of all,

you would have been able to we were all solidarity. First of all, if we if there's a that's why comic suck. We all suck because if we were in solidarity, they would have had to sit fucking eliminate all of us. And we could have waited to sign for that week and then we would have been like, no, we're not doing it past this. And then when they would have had to.

Yep. And they would have, because one of us or two of us were like, no, I'll take the 25. It was one. It was one. Who wasn't? And they fuck you. What? Who was it? I know.

Who was it? Say it. Go on with your haircut. Norton. No. With Miss Pat. No. She's wearing a wig. What?

Who was it? I don't know. Who was it? With the miss Pat She's wearing a wig Who was it? I don't know who is me We had Norton with your haircut had Adrian Appaluchi Miss Pat I don't think it was her who else was on it. I don't know who will shit I don't remember at all. There we go. Darnell, you kidding me. That's what you told me.

I didn't know that. No, I didn't tell you that. I thought from you, I was in there. I saw the text. You showed me the text where he said, you know, Dan would, I don't know, I don't even talk to that dude. I don't know that. Yeah, I felt bad.

No, I don't know who it was, but there felt bad. No, I I don't know who it was But there was somebody in the mix like nah, I'm just gonna take that It was just like yeah, I'm good because they wanted the heat right you know It's like they people sometimes you know money the heat when when are you got? Acts from commie central Lemonade and I was still but I was still booked to do that season. I called you I called big are you doing it? Are we are we going forward with this or no? Yeah, solidarity. I was still booked to do that season. I called you. I called me like are you doing it? Are we are we going forward with this or no? Yeah, solidarity. I was all sound there. You know rough solid there. You know rough

I did the same thing and he said fuck you and do it and bomb on purpose It's right. It's it to go eat it on purpose. He said he said I would rather you not do it But I was like I'm not doing I call them up. I can't what's like a busy anyway I really wanted to do it. I needed to do it for my family. I needed the money and the exposure. And I fucking put my career in the back burner for yet another person who is the same thing.

It would have been funny if we'd all done it and told a story like, so my friend Dari, and just told the story about one, uh-oh, dropping a card. What's that? Darjusum Cash. Oh yeah, thanks. Appreciate it. I fucking a card. What's that? Darjusum Cash? Oh yeah, thanks. Appreciate it.

I fucking hate it. Dude. It's great. Help me down. There it is, man. I have questions for you, dude. For me? Yeah.

Oh, how does it feel to be in the hot seat? It's not that hot. Or maybe I'm just. Is the heat in the hot seat, please? Or maybe I'm just over. Nobody's hot. Why can't I get a waters what I'm saying, though? Why can't I get a chair?

I know. I don't chairs know what the chair is doing. There's no water to hot. Why can I get a waters what I'm saying though? Why can't get a chair? I know I know No chairs know what the chair is there on a water to Why chair here's here's the guest Did you say I'll get on my legs? Why would I say something like that? Why the fuck would you not give him a chair? Joe Why did you not be the old set up with four people? You said you were good second guest it wait. I I showed you that yeah, I already I sent you this of Speaking of movie movie money. It's got already on the five dollar bill What is it would you get that that's movie money? That's like that what they use for

No, no, I just saw the movie money, but they the guy showed it to me now. Oh, that's wow money, but the guy showed it to him and I was like, oh, that's wow. Who sent us this? Sean's. Did you write something for the writer? Support the writers and the act of how? Wait, what's the question? Go out now. How will you support them? Go pick it? Where are they? Around here picking it up on the picking it up on. I got the whole schedule. I'm going to go tomorrow.

Are you really? Yeah, he's going to go to a black lives matter protest. I want to one and guess what? hijacked for a fucking Earth Day situation. Yeah. I'm there for black lives and they're like, we got to recycle. That's not what I, that's why the fact that cause failed. You want to get co-op? I don't know if that's why I failed. You want to go, like the same house as the woman bought with the money from black lives

money. Yeah, the mansion she bought and then think she got caught, which blows me away. Why if you're going to pull some move like that, Would you leave a money trail? Have you ever watched any Law and Order episode ever new money, bro new money unbelievable just get a nice apartment Also, they don't get a nice apartment save it put it away a little bit of time allowance I don't feel like people who make those kind of moves aren't exactly You know what I mean, yeah, you know I? He just tried to wiggle out of the hot seat. How?

By fucking shifting attention away from the questions we're about to ask him. That's because if you go back, he is Beth. Beth. He's not John Dutton like me. There we are. It took, oh, I already take the test please. Wait, I already watched Yellowstone. You watch Yellowstone?

I have seen a couple of them. Because you don't watch it. I know, you go home and read a book with you and your girlfriend and pat a dog Try it. I gave it like five episodes. All right. Here we go. You're gonna find out which dot new. I ready. We go. Here we go Which dot of them here? Answer these questions. I'm a yes, don't which answer that which trait describes you as the best fierce Outgoing compassionate compassionate. Okay. Oh Jesus. Oh wow. None of us picked that. Which shape is described you when you are given a goal? Driven logical emotional or controlling Logical I'll get out of it. No, okay. Say Jewish. How would you deal with failure for the first time?

Let me see become motivated become rebellion Be closed-minded or take authority. Rebellious. Yeah. Oh, bro. Wow. Here we go. Now, don't show us right away.

Yeah. Let us guess before you scroll down and bury it. To get automatically ghost down when you click on. Well, shut it off. Uh, how would you describe you describe your enemy? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, start over. How would your enemies describe you? Kant, asshole, shithead, aletus, fuckdog, stubborn, blunt, spiritual, spiritual. I think they would say, blunt, blunt, okay. There we go. There we go. They smoke and which profession best suits your interest? Please say it's comedian. Politician, lawyer, rancher, or psychologist. Rancher, that's a fucking leading question

for the Dutton test. That's what I think. Oh, lawyer, obviously. I stacked wood, I stacked wood last week. Yeah, I'd say lawyer. Yeah, lawyer, of course. With the logic. All right, came out.

Hi, who do you pick? Who do you think he's gonna be? I say Jamie. I want to be the guy from, I think the guy who runs the, who has the, the, the, the, the Native American dude who has the casino. Yeah, that's, I want to be the guy who has the basic who has the, the, the, the, the, the, the Native American dude who has the casino. Yeah, that's, I'm gonna be the guy with the base

called, so Indian Jew. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm right with you. Chew Jew, suju, suju, which is a Jew. I want to be either the half, halfling son or the guy who has had the baseball field in his backyard. You mean Kevin Cosner? Okay, you're not John Dutton, a hundred percent no time. I'm gonna say he's Jamie. You're saying the suju. Okay, go ahead. Bath!

Also bath, baby. There's no bath. Double baths. No, there's not. Double baths. There's another. Hi, I'm bath. All writers are gay and then, and we support them.

That is true. All writers are gay. Yeah. And support them. That is true. All writers are gay. And all the best shows are really gay writers writing about gay culture, letting them being acted by the women from sex in the city. There's no women like that. There's no women like that. There's no, it's just gays. It's just gays.

Yeah, just gays, even in this room. Shut up. I love that. Shut up, bitch. All right, we got questions. I say open up for bed. Ready? Benny and the jet, Benny the jet. Sean. Yeah. So Norman, and another Nola guy yeah likes to snowboard. And I think you ski. Yeah. Better on the slopes. No, Norman, but not really. Really? Even though I did when we were skiing

this year. So I think you were like, Norman's better snowboard than Sean. I was like no, he's fucking not I got like real indignant about it because he's not marks not a better snowboarder than me, but he's better in She's much better shape than I am so you're you're a snowboarder. I can do both, but I suck at both I use a Norman Yeah Norman is bad Yeah, and Sean is worse. Probably worse.

But Sean can see a line with just a little bit of effort. He will whip past Mark Norman. So he's like, I'm better than that. But the reality is, if you watch him on the slopes, one is having a far worse time than the other. And you think it's because of your shape. I think if Mark and I had to race on snowboards, I would win because I, because when I apply myself, I'm pretty good.

You're pat on the cat trails. I think, oh yeah, terrible. Cat trails. What's the cat trail? The flat. It goes pretty flat for some years. You just push off, it's snowboarders, you're just fucked. But if we're both just casually riding,

yeah, Mark probably looks like better than I do. Right. Yeah, but I can also ski badly as well. I'm like a bisexual can't make either a person come right You know, I can just get a good outfit Not not like this fun not like this guy I'm trying to dress up. What do you wear? I got everybody oh not this year the year before I got a buddy ski jerseys. What's that? No, we were not no

We want you. Oh, yeah, yeah. We all had big giant triple X basketball jerseys. Yeah, see each other Yeah, I think I would dark nabitsky. I had dark this year. You had dark I had the giant triple X basketball jerseys. Yeah, see each other. Yeah. So I think I would jerk Nibbitsky. I had dirt this year. You had dirt. I had the dirt this year. Oh, because I had a new jacket. You had, you had, you had, wait, also a few years ago, the first one of these we ever did,

Saul, Volcano, Sam. Volcano. Volcano. Sal. Sal, Volcano. Ju, Sal. Yeah. Sal, Volcano bird.

What? Sal, Volcano. Volcano. I fuck, why am I fucking blanking on, fuck up his name right What? Sal Volcano, volcano. I fuck, why am I fucking blanking on fuck up his name right now? I don't know, there's so. So, Sal, I heard you try to, we're talking about, and say each of you should get a half.

Biblical. I'm just gonna call him biblical from now on. You brought us all those fucking mittens, those gloves. Yeah. What were they called? The gloves that like freaky frezes. Freaky frezes. Why don't I have friends like that? I have my friends are old and dying. Yeah, that's we invited Bobby for that

You didn't well you came uh never did amping once you don't ski though do you mean camping once? I invented camping But you we came to the woods once yeah, cuz of me in Montreal. I did all that well I was with you the with me. Yeah, you came once is what I found the place. I was with you, the last part. You're with me. Yeah, you came once, that's what I'm saying. You know, you did, I told somebody about this, we were coming down, we did this massive trip. Two hours up, two hours down, the other four hours and total trip.

Yeah. Coming out the next day, raining, cold, and my back, I had a pinch nerve in my neck, I was really heavy at the time, and my back pinched up. He took my backpack and wore it on the front for like the like a quarter of the trip down the mountain Yeah, this guy so my this is this is Park Slope No parks park

City 2019 it's Ryan O'Neill Renazese Bert Kreyser Ari Norman me right It's Ryan O'Neill, Renazizi, Bert, Kreysher, Ari, Norman Ming, right? Ari and Steve and Ryan are skiing. Bert, Norman and I are snowboarden, right? So they're far better skiers than we are, any of us are snowboarders. And plus, Bert's just a content machine. So he's also, he's also like, got a gimbal

the whole time filming until, but, you know, it works. But then we meet at this. It's always fun to hang out with. Yeah. We read a couple videos. It's fun. It's like, look, you try to jump. You got to ninch off the ground. Yeah, you mean, yeah, we got some back and forth back and forth. That early boomerang. But we meet at this lodge for lunch. And it was supposed, it was a one beer lunch that turns in like a four beer lunch, right? And then it becomes a, Hey, you guys are so fucking shitty.

It's no boarding that we, the skiers are gonna go back up the mountain and beat you guys down from here. And keep going before you guys go from here to the bottom. And so we take that as like a fuck, yeah. And of course, we all run out and it takes us all to the 15 minutes to put our boards on. Fucking borders. Yeah, they're already on the board.

It's like fuck go but me, Bert and Norman turn into like the fucking bomb to the three some dude We're just it was amazing. That's snowboarding. I probably ever done in my life probably I was half cocked and then give a fuck But we are just blasting down the mountain we get to the bottom. It's amazing. There's a bar right there We're doing drinks birds getting recognized of course round are coming out. It's crazy. There's a bar right there. We're doing drinks. Birds getting recognized. Of course, rounds are coming out. It's crazy. And then like an hour goes by. We're like, wait, where the fuck are those guys? And then we start calling everyone's phone and no one's answering. We finally get ahold of Ryan. He's like, yeah, they're fucking lifting

Ari down. He tried to jump through some trees, broke his arm. A shot. A shot. Oh, remember that? Yeah. Shattered it. And then that night we still had to go to Salt Lake and do shows. Yeah, we drew. Yeah. Yeah, but I moved the mic.

I didn't realize I was like, I think so. I think so. I think I was here. Yeah. I was like, I fuck. Yeah. Oh, opening to the show. Oh, packed out.

I was like, hi, for God. Yeah. God. Well, you know, it was actually also great was we're in the Uber. It's like an hour. That's laughing when that happened. Oh, like, like, I mean, because the whole time also great was we're in the Uber, because it's like an hour. That's laughing when that happened. Oh, like, like, I mean? Because the whole time, he's like,

no, I don't think it's broken. I don't think it's, oh God, I think it's fine. I think it's fine. I just finally, I want to talk to him. He's like, many times. Yeah, I do. Dr. Schaffer.

But the best part is we're in the Uber, flying down, driving, you know, it's like an hour drive, and we're in the car and he gets a call from a club manager being like, Hey, where are you guys? And it was like 745 and he already like, oh, we're about 10 minutes. You know, we're it's a like, oh cool. The show is started at seven though. You guys were in hour late. It's like 720. Yeah, yeah, then he's like, yeah, I'm like, Hey, Kiyotabi, I'm not even close to. No, I don't I'd love to lie to you, but this is the point. The show, wow, not eight. We fucked up, yeah.

But it was awesome. It was like whatever dude. It sounds like a fun trip, man. Yeah, Bert bought $100 with a Taco Bell. That's, no, no, don't talk up. Don't talk up. Thank God Joe Liss wasn't there. Thank God.

Oh, I'm very about this one, yeah. I hear this. He goes, he goes, I want $100 in the drive-tho and she's like, what do you want? I don't, just a hundred dollars worth. And she goes, do you want like six burritos and maybe some meals and she goes, hey, hey, hey, hey, what if you get to a hundred?

It's not bringing it. I like, because he goes, he pulls up and we're all like, oh, what, and he goes, no, no. And then the person's like, welcome to El Taco, can I take him and he goes, I'm gonna give you $100. And you give me as much food as that can buy. It should have been more than 24 dollars.

Yeah, well, he lived, I mean, I'd probably eat Del Taco for three. If I was the guy behind that and somebody, I would just, I would give him 15 cases of water. I would have done a lot better for all of us. Yeah, I would have thanked that. Here you go. Here you set 100. Here for all of us. Yeah, I would have thanked that. Here you go. Here you set 100. Here's what you get. No, I meant taco. Well, you should have been most specific at all, especially like me waking up the next morning being like, oh, you guys quick breakfast, but there's still Del Taco, right? He's gonna be right now.

Eat up a Del Taco. Big Ben, cock 69. What's the most you drank while filming best bars? Oh, yeah, best bars. We drank. I mean, dude, we were fucking trashed on that show constantly because you had to drink you couldn't not Like you couldn't fake it. You could fake it But then you still take a sip or two and you're taking a sip of two like I did a 12-inch show for the Food Network travel channel with sure mod We had to eat and I ate I mean, I was like a men versus food. Oh yeah. I mean, I was fat as fucking. God damn it, I was just eating and eating.

Good, thanks. And Sherrod quit, like they had a, at some point they were like scraping food off his plate to produce the show would have been over, like the second restaurant. Oh, because he just did. I had to eat his food at one of the places. You had to?

Because he couldn't finish it. So I was just giving it to me. We had three more restaurants to go to. Oh my God, you could have just thrown it away. No, it was a fat part. The most, I remember it. So Boston was the city I enjoyed doing the most of best bars.

Which bar? I couldn't tell you. That was the thing. I can't remember any of the bars. I can't remember any of the bars barely. New Orleans. New Orleans. I mean, Boston has old school. Boston just had like old school like dirt bag bars I can't remember any of the cars barely. New Orleans. New Orleans.

Boston has old school. Boston has old school dirtbag bars where you're like run. Yeah, it's Joe DeRosa. Yeah, we're going to lock the doors and let you keep going. Yeah, where it says bar. I wish only if you know what I mean. But there was one bar where afterwards, dude. I wish only and I don't mean the door to the Irish.

I know what I mean. I'm not a tellyance if I know what I am about Italians if you don't have talking about. There was a bar that afterwards the staff played like some form of fucking dice and then it was shooting gin. Right. And we played one round with them on camera and then they're like, all right, that's a wrap for the day.

I'm like, I'm fucking staying. I was just like, I'm fucking, I'm, take the mic off. I'm fucking staying. The hotel's two blocks away. I'm just going to get fucked up with these guys. And then the next day, we had to eat brunch at this place. And I had to like, I took like three bites for camera and then I was like, and excuse me.

And then just, yeah, in the bathroom. And then came back and took three more bites for camera. And I was like, what is happening again? And then yanked and then they made me a bloody marry. And it actually did do the, wow, it bit the hair of the Sasquatch, man. But that show will kill everybody thinks that's such a great gig. It was a fucking nightmare. Because drink like the food show. Yeah, drink it in a great foot. Yeah, dude. Yeah. Same as Norman and fucking Sam. I'm now like, you

want to drink like, I can't do it. Oh, I got to drink a Kaka cat this week. I can only drink bogega. I'm behind on my whiskey and I'm show hung over unless of course we're talking about bogega cat whiskey. I promise my therapist I'd do more man versus food that show. Yeah. When they were replacing the guy I met with the. Was that Bert? No, that he was.

No, Bert the conqueror. No, Bert the conqueror. No, he was this guy has has his same name as a comic. Adam. Adam Richmond. Adam Richmond. And he had a, he wrote a book how he was killing him. That show was killing him.

And the lady was like, would you do, would you do that show? And I was like, if you figure out a way that I don't die, I mean, the guy who just did it quit because his liver was failing. Yeah, yeah. You're not supposed to eat 75 hamburg his liver was failing. Yeah, yeah. You're not supposed to eat 75 hamburgers in one sitting. You're not.

No. No. That's where it wins. There's that place in Vegas on Fremont, where it's like you have to sign the waiver to eat the burger. Well. So big. Yeah, that fucking, it's right there on Fremont, right?

By way, they do Skankfest where like there's this, you can weigh yourself outside. Right. And it's like the nuclear death burger this, you can weigh yourself outside. Right. And it's like the nuclear death burger and you have to sign a waiver before you order that fucking burger. So like if you drop dead eating it or after you eat it, well it's so,

it's just like a giant amount of. You're the new guy doing the show. Or the attack burger, the heart attack burger. The new guy doing the show showed up looking all right. Now every season it's like, dude, he is here right. Dude, paler. Unless they, they set you with a personal trainer that just rips into you Rage against the creatine what what's the rage against the creatine?

What was the first band and comedian you saw live? First band I ever saw live was nine inch nails Opening for them was pop elite itself really remember that fucking band. Nope British British British rap rock. No And the nine snails Great. Yeah Do what I'll go use to manage them? What I had we never told me that have you never told anyone that? It was that. Your uncle in band management? All the shitty podcast. You never ever mentioned that?

You're a connection to this. I don't know. Never. People don't bring up Jesus on your podcast with you. That's what Nine is now is named after. Do you know that? No. That's the nails that were used to nail Jesus

for the cross. Nine inches. And to his. I hate one of that shit. Don't hate it. He died for your sins exactly He did that for us, bro. Yeah I'm not that they killed them. No, they ratted him out

Yeah, nine thousand fucking great. Oh, does it suck that Jesus probably look more like him then the Jesus went out Yeah, that's suck black. Are you just a gone? Yeah, yeah, it's just a gone you You had a lot of bread. Yeah, he's good. A fucking chubby, long hair, but a hairline. Who's finishing that fluff? Oh, suck. If I went back in time, it was just him.

Just borrowin silver to make me mad. He's getting sense of humor. You'd be like, I hired you to be the carpentry work and you're like what the end of the roof. It's not finished like It's mostly finished It's just the lazy you find out he had carbonate he washed the guys feet because he owed him money I gotta do this. Yeah, he became he became a profit because he's just a magician He had the wine is a chance to try and a reason Oh my god, he's the Messiah.

Like Judas wasn't actually dead, he just helped him escape. Guy was hiding. He was hiding, I'm getting out of that. Not Judas, what's the guy who, Leviticus, no. I don't know. The fucking the one that rose.

Brutay. No, that fucking, wow. That's so funny. Yeah, that's Jesus. That's so funny. Yeah, that's Jesus. That's right. That's you. Lazarus. Lazarus.

Lazarus for just a guy. How funny. This is what I was looking at today. And I just want to get your who's going to win. Zuckerberg against Elon. That's in the fight. Is that actually going to happen? Yeah.

I think Zuckerberg's going to win. Surprise everybody. I think he's taking some training. I hope they knock each other out I hope you think it's gonna win. I hope they do that like double knockout. They take each other out I'm gonna tell you right now. There's no double knockout. Who is Zuckerberg? I'm gonna fuck my mom off. No fucking joke. Isn't Zuckerberg is training? He has and he has the fucking Matrix training. How are you going to put it in him?

It's long COVID, Bobby. I hope you become short-covert and you're not around anymore. Does it damn? Sorry, I love you. Damn. Wait, but Elon Musk is South African, right? Yeah, but he also, but it's up in the fucking slums. Please get it.

I doubt that. Slums playing up in the fucking slums. The slums play in play in footing. And now in the show. No, this is he the African. It's not. No, 100%. Any accents.

See the African. I don't I don't fucking. I saw a photo. It's not going to. I saw a photo of Zuckerberg when I'm going to with two UFC fighters shirtless. He's not only shredded shredded. Yeah. Uh, he is legitimately training with fucking black

belt Brazilian jiu jitsu. Look at it. Look at him, dude. That doesn't zoom in on his arms. Zoom in on his arms next to the champs. You didn't expect me to do that. That's it. Zoom in. Click on just that photo. I don't want to see all the other ones. How about just zoom in? Zoom in.

Oh, no. One photo I want to see. They're going to make a pop up on a new thing. Perfect. Oh, great. Perfect. Yeah, fine. They can't find the eggs.

So we're not going to subscribe. And click out. Click out. Click out of that. Just take your time. Yeah, put another ad up. Put that there. Click on it again.

Talk me to the business side. Oh my click on the other one. The other one to the left. Zoom in on that. Left top left. Yeah, go there. Now click on it. Zoom in.

Zoom, zoom, zoom, zoom. Zoom, zoom, zoom. I can see from here. Zoom. I mean, I just like it. There's nothing better than making an artistic kid kid these are the other side of the list Okay, look at his look at the arms on all three of those guys. They're kind of similar. Yep I mean dude look at his chest. He'd easily be like a 170 pounder. I just cut the heads off and go to their bodies

Yeah, dude. That's a UFC fighter. I don't give a shatter He's gonna put me in a party. We don't know much might be doing this. I'll bet you I'll bet you right now all eating babies to get a hundred dollars right now hundred dollars Hundred dollars he wipes the floor with him So what does that mean if he doesn't wipe the floor with him? If he just would if he just knocks him out if Elon knocks him out how you get a hundred bucks? Oh Thanks for explaining that he went so if I lose this So if Elon doesn't win I like how you explain. Thanks for explaining. That's better than that. He wins.

So if I lose this, that's the... So if Elon doesn't win, I have to give you $100. This is bullshit. This is a bullshit scam. Well, you said what if he doesn't knock him out? I just don't fucking care. I want him both to knock him out. I know you don't care.

We're doing a podcast and I'd like you to get a good... Oh, yes. I will, you know what? For the sake of the podcast, you'll do it. I don't know. I don't know. What about you? the podcast you'll do it dollar What about you know about a hundred hundred dollars one of them pisses I'll bet that one them pisses. I'll bet you a hundred dollars. I'll bet you a hundred dollars Say pisses somebody

Like during okay, cuz that could be a very specific like these guys piss four or five times a day I would I bet you that Elon will be out cold one way or the other. You're just going to tap. He's going to be out cold. I don't think he's going to I think he's going to tap and still crank it up a little bit. I just also I also don't think training makes you a good fighter. How many pay is a lot of time to train him? Probably 20 guys, the 20 million holder currently.

But but but but but you still have to be able to fight. You should have to have the show. Look at the heads. Hey, I've never seen Zuckerberg on a hovercraft. Yeah, I mean, you could also. Yeah, dude, the guys better than us. Show it. He's got a hovercraft.

Hovercraft. You can talk. You can get over the water. Show you every. He has a hovercraft show. Show every losing UFC fighter. They're also ripped like that. Yeah, but dude show everybody that works at Facebook Nobody has that body nobody has that body at Facebook. No you nobody What is that it's off the ground though?

You got it? The video show the video YouTube YouTube YouTube right there now show the video make it big make it big. Why do I have to do this? Dude that's all he's gonna win dude this guy Hold the American flag That's nuts. He's got a whole some of these so autistic. He's hands are free. He'll but shout his eyes out There's three of them in the room. They'll attack you. Sorry boys. I Love it dude. I'm I mean, I like this. I did not like this kid last year. I love this kid. I love America.

You've got very bonds. I love America and I love that he's willing to beat, I don't know what that weird move is. I'm trying to. I'm trying to. The viral video has been watched millions, of course it's million, because he doesn't have shadow band like me.

Yeah. He's an asshole. Hey, I suggested a new one by Mark Zuckerberg. It looks like Facebook is suggesting this again. Ha ha ha. I'm gonna show you. So ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha 100 Zuckerberg. Yeah, take it. I need all Zuckerberg wins. Yeah. What the fuck was it? What a real. And that are you not slice it?

Let's slice it. I'm gonna do blood. I'll do blood. All right, ready? And you bet me that he knocks him both out. I say he does. I say they both knock each other out. I say it and Zuckerberg knocks him out.

Okay, you know, here's what I do. How about this? Let's be more specific. I bet it ends in a draw. Not a draw. Nobody knocks anybody out. Nobody knocks anybody out. Nobody knocks anybody out. Nobody knocks anybody out. It goes. It doesn. I'm nobody. Nobody knocks anybody out. Nobody knocks anybody out.

Nobody knocks anybody out. It goes. It doesn't matter when's but nobody knocks anybody out. I'll bet that. I bet. Now the one I'm gonna knock that out. I'll also take 100 each if you want. After he chokes out Elon Zuckerberg sucks him off right in the ring.

Oh my god. I'll take 100 just like a just like a straight up. Listen show my top of the straight up. I can take come. I can take a come. You see the the UFC fighter the female fighter. She wins And the flash her tip she whips her tits out. No, we're just video celebrity match dude. What a great It was that real is that dude and they were great It wasn't like you know real fighter titties. It wasn't real fighter titties. Yeah, where it's the psyched. There's all the fans titties.

Where's this video? It's coming right now. We got it. Here we go. The black bar represents tits. Yeah, that black bar that they got that doesn't show us the tits stinks. Can you get me the unedited version?

You know, she did it less as like a check out my tits more. It's like a, these nipples should be free. Yeah. We should be fighting topless, which I'm like, I agree. I agree. I had a lot of hair. We have not forgotten your message.

What did Chelsea Hanley say? Free the nipple. Free the nipple. Really? Yeah. She said her knees are getting cold. Free the nipple. Ha ha ha.

Chelsea, did you like her? I do like her. And she's actually still holding it together. Chelsea Hanley. Chelsea Hanley is her name. She had the show on E. Yeah, Chelsea lately. You were on it. I was not ever. neither me neither what's here. We're not up

That's a lot bigger. Yeah, I'm gonna say nothing Taking talk baby come on. Do you ever see the thing? That's a new thing and you're not part you're the and you're the ampersand He's tick tick tick talk and Take tick talk Yeah, tick talk. Get a good You ever see the video where she gets peed on by the dude from American pie. Pretty son. No wait, Chelsea handler Yeah, what's the kid from American pie the fuck's the pie? Jason Danny Glover Jason now big Jason Bates Jason Bates Jason Biggs pisses on it. What?

She's gonna they're on a boat in real life love it bring that video up Wait, is it a joky joke? No, how is you joke? No, no, there is she's in the water. She's in the water She's in the dude it doesn't matter and he doesn't realize it does not matter. She's pissing on her face. He thought she was a dolphin I always Keep the jellyfish for Her sleek skin. You pee on them first. They're gonna crash away. I mean, the video disappeared for a minute, but it was out there. I didn't realize that it's funny. It's like hashtag me too. Women's rights. You let a guy piss on your face. You think it goes go fuck yourself.

So it was like a I always down to party. Yeah, fuck you. That's a woman. That's women's rights as well. What you don't? I believe you think you think you think you would be funny if you piss on me in that same situation. No What do I buy piss on you? I would fucking destroy you Would leave some piss on the chamber. You know that if you pissed I'm not into piss you know that you have some people in your life that are Into funny piss jokes. I let Sam Tripoli piss on me If I could turn my back if I'm in the water, I can feel on my head and then dive. Why just say him what I Don't know I got good stream. I'd pee on anyone. Yeah, you smells like beer too. No, man. Sparegus

Everyday But talking about this cocksack it brings this video up or says I can't find the video He's just clicking the way you waste shuffle papers while you're looking at he's pulling up We're not really already got the right one bring that one up. He's pulling up. We can watch that one here We go here you go ready. That's already bring it up. Go back you fucking Oh my God. What the fuck this this part nice. Oh, those are nice All right now do you have the video of her getting pissed on yeah, let's see her again this part. Nice. Those are nice. All right. Now do you have the video of her getting pissed on?

Yeah. Let's see her again. Now, find it. That one's not up there. She has a sex video. This one. She's pretty hot. Even sweaty. Is this a was she like band or anything like that? And she get. No, I think it was celebrity fights anyway. Oh, it was. Now. It was just kind of cool because you watch. I love it. Tits are great. Dude, kids are great. I say free. I say free. Remember when Open Anthony asked that Jamie massage series a big big fan of ONA and they go, are you?

I love the show. I never miss it. And then come here goes, what is W O W stand for? It's a big bumper sticker we have. It's like one of our biggest things. And he goes, Jamie still ready to lie. He goes, uh, wacky Wednesdays. Like, no, no, no, no.

But he just took a shot of our guests. Wacky Wednesdays. Maybe he was right. I think it's like, no, forgets what they were talking about. I've really came in with somebody, right? He came with someone because they were banning the N word from the laugh factory. Yeah. Came in with, I don't know, except when, uh, wait, comics are there. Yeah, that's a lot of things that go. Alright, we got a rap to sub dude. Wait, one more question for him. I got no more questions. Only at three.

No, three. Only get three. Hey, Google this right now. Question for Sean Patton. See what comes up. Wait a minute. But something might come up. That's not going to come up. Sure. Sure. Let's see. Something might come up. That's not gonna come on. Sure. I'm patting. Let's see it. Something might come up. That's Something will something will and whatever that is. It might be a website. Yeah, of course. I'll get that all I changed to Sean Payton. Yeah, Sean Payton. No, I said no On patent now Bobby, you got to teach us guys how to use Google before you start You're focused on if they can type or read, but there's more to it. Yeah, I know.

I can't, though. I don't have the ability to do it. I have no more anger in me to teach these guys. You know, like your son fucking whip him in a shape. I have, yeah, John Maximus, little John, call your kid. He's 27. Shit, really?

No. Okay. He's 10. Okay. I believe both. You know, if you said 27, I'm gonna get it, man. I probably do have some. I mean, there's probably other.

I said, I heard stories. So you got your special out, where is it at? Peacock. Peacock right now. Peacock right now. And you're gonna be shooting another one soon, too, right? Yeah, I mean, I'm shot a thing and then we're gonna shoot the special,

probably not until later this year. Let me shot a thing. I don't want to. I'm trying not to talk too much about it. It's a terrible job. You're peaking everyone's interest. It's a sort of thing. I don't want to. I'm trying not to talk too much about it. It's a terrible job. You're peaking everyone's interest. It's a hybrid sketch. Who's producing it?

Michael Che. Me, me and another guy. Okay, so Michael Che produced your first one? Michael Che. A and P.Coc right now. 800 pound gorilla. 800 pound gorilla. Love those boys.

Yeah, they're great. And Michael Che teamed up to produce the first one. P.Coc and now it's on P.Coc. That's great. It's awesome. Anything great. and Owes on Peacock. That's great. It's awesome. Anything great. I mean, I don't know. That's part of the reason we don't know.

They don't tell you numbers. I know, that's the one thing. They don't tell you. They don't fucking tell you numbers. It's like, it's like, you don't know. And I just got permission to start clipping it up. No shit. So now it's finally starting to clip up, but like.

That's cool. But yeah, it's not, it's interesting. But it's awesome. I'm glad I got to do it. I'm glad it happened You know, but and where can people come see your dates and stuff me shorn patent that calm I got dates with David cross still this year and then a lot of dates myself and then starting to Stuff for next year as well because it's already fucking July. Yeah, no Jesus flying

But yeah, I mean I'm always follow me on Instagram at mr. Trump had I'm always posting about dates So let's fucking go let's do it go to my website right there. I'm doing the tiny tiny home tour We're going to Vermont. I got that's already passed Port Smith the Hampshire we added a second show up there I know you're probably in La Cone you're going going Nashville. I can't get over there from La Cone. Don't worry, La Cone. Here we got your cover July 29th at Colonial. Listen, breath of a New Jersey Vegas. These are all big spots. Rochester. It's coming everywhere. Madison, Wisconsin, Kansas City, Missouri.

Let's just leave it here instead of the East Providence. I'm on the, I'm literally on the last line. So if you want to hashberry park, go to town. God, what the fuck's up with these guys? They're just doing a little bit of scrolling on Google help. I don't know what we're going to do. You gotta talk to them. Man, you got merch! Theacomacwebos.com!

Please go there and get yourself some WRKWD gear. I need some merch. I got fuck the chequespot shirt up there. It was so well. You gave me one of those. No, did you wear it? I never did. Yeah, well fucking wear it. It was so well. You gave me one of those. No, did you wear it? I never did. Yeah, well, fucking wear it.

It was so well. I'll give you half the money. Dude, I gotta be honest. You like the check spot? I love the legend shirt. There's some other ones I like. What's that? The regs.

It's not bad. I like the regs. I think more likely to wear the regs over the check spot. All right, scroll down. How about this shirt? If I gave you this shirt, ready to scroll down? Yeah. What about the fat bob belt shirt?

Not you. How about not? It says in the front though go to not why would you click that go to not you fucking hate I wear that go back where Robert Kelly's quickly lies over the not you shirt not you to the right lower left Click on that so on the front it says click on it Staying a while I can't it's this on spectrum. This isn't on them. This isn't on them anymore. I gotta eat I can't now they're a zoomed way. It's on the you said on the spectrum on the fun. It says you Great on the back. It's not You're great. That one you want that one? Yeah, that's not bad. That's that's something I could wear back. You could wear that okay

I got merged it's just my social security number So on the shirt. My mother's made a name right there. Go on the rocket. The Robert Kelly shirt. Would you read this one? I have worn that one. You have it? Yeah. Okay. I've worn it. You want that one? The fat Bob Kelly. Fat Bob Kelly. It's so much on ink that he didn't have to. He just waited. I, Ari, are you a quick comedy, right? The quick comedy I might pick it up again in October in Chicago and Kansas City and Iowa City and So you two families we get to shows anymore because you're too famous We're gonna shows next summer. Why? Some shows the next summer will be on

Why don't you do some shows? Why don't we do a tour up in the Hampshire? We'll stay at the tiny house go camping and do shows when we talk about July August. Yeah, I mean Fuck yeah, my man when's when's your I'm gonna be touring elsewhere And so I'm not gonna go there. Oh, why you come? I'm not doing nothing I August he's right you weren't even closer inviting him. No, because he's a skier not a camp. It's you a camper It's come on look at what's you a camper camper I'll build a fire really I'll be the fire like that yeah I fucking I wrote history and animal that we catch before you got there before you got there's just Orleans hey you know I mean thank you thank you all right you're in that

I'll do it but I might have but I got but I might have gigs July August already we don't know me showing patent dot com go there I'm just still plugging myself I love it in the camera I love it don't go I'm going I'm going now season gets a food now you want to go eat I'm just still plugging myself. I love it. I'm going now. I'm going now. Says and get some food now. You want to go eat? I'm gonna get a beer. Wow. Relapse. I'm not relapsed. Alright, let's relapse. Let's do it. I'm in. Alright, you guys. I want to thank you guys. Patreon members. Thank you for being a member. You get this first before anybody. And if you're not a patreon watching on YouTube

Just click subscribe like comment. That's all you got to do or go become a patreon member patreon.com access robber Kelly And make sure you go and check out these guys you guys ready. Yeah, are you sure? Yeah, go max Marcus comedy all social media Danny breath on Instagram and you can check out the cheese show on YouTube ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa?

¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa?

¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? ¿Qué pasa? Con Volotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca.

Espectacularismos, monumentos, rincones de película y un sincindia aventuras te esperan. ¡Friparás! Vuelades de Madrid, Amurcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros. Volotea Tarifa sujetas a disponibilidad, consulta las condiciones en volotea.com a partir de 19 euros. Volotea. Tarifa sujetas a disponibilidad.

Consulta las condiciones en volotea.com.