Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Tank Sinatra | First Fat

Episode Date: August 13, 2023

This week Bobby is joined by comedian and meme creator, Tank Sinatra. They talk about Tank's life before comedy, Bobby talks about all the times he got fat and skinny throughout his life, and they talk about how much they both love Dick's Sporting Goods. This episode is sponsored by GhostBed Listeners can get 40% off all products sitewide! Use promo code YKWD at GhostBed.com/ykwd for 40% Off Sitewide. Limited Time Only. This episode is sponsored by Ship Station Get a 60-day free trial at https://www.shipstation.com/ykwd. Thanks to ShipStation for sponsoring the show! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Pulsan el banner para saber más. Yeah, if that's any guy with the fat burn ends, it's like make burn and yeah Hey today, hello for the day. We're gonna make burn. Yeah, he has a fact I energy, but he's skinny now Yeah, yeah, I follow him. No, so I was like old energy, but he's young this guy. No, this guy. No, not that one That's not the reason That is definitely a fat guy mentally Mentally challenged fat guy with a cool shot. That's not it. That's not it. That's it. This two of them. I didn't know those two of them.

Yeah, baby. We're starting the podcast right now. We're back. You know what, dude. Live. Welcome, everybody. It's the show. I started the social media podcast.

The fact that I'm the fat guy. I'm the fat guy. I'm the fat guy. I'm the fat guy. I'm the fat guy. I'm the fat guy. I started a social media podcast The fact that YKW did podcasts YKW did back again Old school back in the day We're all starting before them all YKW did podcasts is so fun and crazy And there's no rules Shut up, you're ruining this

Work the program I'm sorry It's a comedy podcast This is an NPR That's the podcast done Is there any better show? This is it. And he got the podcast done. Is there any better show? This the original What's up everybody?

Robert Kelly, why KWD at the comedy seller studios above the world famous comedy seller. I'm back at it again. I'm here. at the comedy seller studios above the world famous comedy seller. I'm back at it again. I'm here. We got another great episode. I'm excited about tonight. This was supposed to take place a bunch of times.

It finally is. I've been a fan from a far for a while, but I finally got them in the studio because I just wanted to talk to them and I know you guys are gonna love him. Let's give it up everybody. All right, thanks Anatra. We got, I mean, dude, first of all, your name is Nuts.

Yeah. Are we going? Yeah, okay, good. Is it fake? Thanks Anatra? Yeah, no, that's my birthday. Are you fucking kidding me? Yes.

Are you related to Sanatra? No, I'm lying. I'm lying. I thought I'm sorry, sorry. By the way, are you, I don't mean to come across two familiar? Are you Robert? Yeah. Now, because Bobby was, I mean, when I was listening to you and it's this name, it's my name. It's the reason I name my son Maximus. Uh-huh. Because there's no fucking that's max or maximum maxi. Oh shit. Mussy Must is work. I'm just kidding. I know. Um, I just it's Bob. Everybody. Some people call me Bob. Some people call me Bobby You know what I feel like when people are on a set with Robert De Niro and they do an interview and they're like, you know Bobby came over to me and I'm like, it's fucking Robert De Niro. What do you call him Bobby? But I don't want to come across to you familiar, but I've been a fan of yours since,

I mean, there was this show that you were on. I can't remember the name of the show, but it was Dan Cook, Gary Goman, and please go up, I'm bringing it up right now. Right there. Toregasm was the name of the show. I don't remember that being the name of the show, but 100%. It's literally the three guys you just mentioned and me. the name of the show. I don't remember that being the name of the show, but 100% literally the three guys you just mentioned and me and it says, that looks like a movie though.

No, it was a company central. No, it was a, oh, wait a minute. You're talking about eight guys. No, it was you four. Oh, yeah, that's it. Yeah, Gary Goman, I fucking loved you. I saw him open for a daincook a long time ago. And I was like, that's it. Yeah Gary gomen. I fucking loved it. I saw him open for Dean Cook a long time ago And I was like that guy was funnier than the fucking headliner no disrespect, but Gary gomen is 100% disrespect That's terrible thing to say. I'm sorry I am I I've used to get that a lot when I when I would open for certain people do you have funnier than whoever right? Yeah, yeah, and you eat like Okay, thanks tell that to the booker.

Tell the fans. I actually got that when I was headlining. Uh-huh. And I had somebody in front of me. I heard somebody go, dude, you should have been the headliner. I want to go. No, we should enough. Yeah.

I paid my dues. I've done what I can do. You don't know what I had to go through. I had to follow that. I fucking almost lost it, but I was like, I let it go. Let it happen. Yeah. It's a tough life.

So dude, what is your, is this a tank is not my real name. Oh, but Sinatra. No. Okay, dude, we got a, can I, do you, let's back it up? Let's unpack this. Sure. Because first of all, it's a badass name. Yeah.

I agree. And this episode's going to be hard for you. People watching this, you're going to be like, what is Bobby doing? Is he taking Captain America juice? Who am I looking at? You're gonna go from really in shape, Bobby, to, hey, he lost a little weight. You look great by the way.

I look better. You look even better than when you looked better. Oh, that's a good one. I like that one. Yeah, like you looked better a year ago or whatever it was, you look better than that. So good for you for keeping the momentum going. Thank you.

Because it's not easy. It's not easy. What the fuck can work? And don't even know. I know about you. I follow you on your Instagram. I followed you before I knew about you. And you would do these, you know, you would give these talks on your Instagram. It's not like you're doing stand-up and putting clips up there. No. Like tell my fans, like tell them what you do. So here's the thing. I avoid this question at all costs. If I'm at a party with my wife and they're like, what do you do for work?

I'm like, well, do you know Instagram? Are you familiar with that? If they're not, I just tell, I'm like, I'm a plumber. Really? I can't get into it. I can't. Cause you're an influencer.

But I'm not, cause an influencer. I am. You're what an influencer? I can't you're an influencer I am but I'm not cuz an Influencer I am you're what an influencer I'm a self-made influencer I call myself an influencer but an indian always everybody watches well you're doing it for actually my wife and my son maybe I'll start but you only you will know what I mean when I say influencer because influencer brings about this air of like arrogance and travel and living a better life than you and rubbing it in your face. And that's not what I'm about at all.

I want to make people laugh. I want to make people forget that life sucks for 30 seconds at a time. Right. Whether any one of my pages, whatever it is, I want to just, this is, you know, you're scrolling. And if I catch your attention, great. If I don't, I'll get you on the next one. No problem.

Where are you from? Long Island. From Italian. Irish. If I don't, I'll get you on the next one. No problem. Where are you from? Long Island. You're from on Italian. Irish. Get the fuck. Why Frank Sinatra? I mean, thanks Sinatra because it's not fucking Mickey Mickey McFindex. Did you think I would have taken off? I mean, that Mickey McFindex. And that's a good one. You know that has a ring. Well, thanks Sinatra. I want an account called Mickey McFindex. I want to see if it takes off. I'll go straight for you. Yeah, please.

Yeah, I'll help you out. So, thanks in Ahtra, obviously it's a play on words. Right. I'm big. I have blue eyes. I'm from New York. I just, it's one of those things where it just comes to you in a moment. I changed my Instagram name and really that's when it started growing.

Nobody was following George Rache for Joe. Sure. Who? Exactly. I never want to hear you say your name again. I don't George Rache for Joe. Who exactly? I never want to hear you say your name again. I don't ever want to say it again. You, you fucking forced this. I was right. I know. Thanks to notcha is the greatest name ever. Yeah. My name is George. Don't fucking say it. Don't say it. Don't say it. Don't say it. Boys, George. Please don't. The jungle George Bush, George Michael. Yeah. I mean, something to hit him with because he's big it was the 80s

So it was like it's just the the George names the it was never ending. Yeah, I mean George is in a bad name It's a solid name tank is a way my son's name is George. Oh really? Yeah, fuck him What a pussy name my son's name. Yeah, no Yeah, so tanks and acha was like a lightning moment. I was like, that's gonna fucking, that's a good name, because it's got recognizable, but it's obviously a play. Tank Abbott was a big UFC fighter, bro.

Love Tank Abbott. Yeah. That's where you got it from. It was part of the equation after the fact, not during it, after the fact I was like, I think this is gonna work. Like I just gotta stay juiced up. Tank Abbott was such, he was just a badass.

Scary dude. Scary guy, Google Tank Abbott, if you don't know who we're talking about, he is just a tough human being. He was a pit bull. You know what I'm saying? Fat is fuck. Fat is fuck.

No muscle tone, but he's one of those guys you could see fighting in a bar. And check that back, he's one of those guys you could see. No, he's fighting there. Look at him. Fighting in a bar and check that back. He's pretty in shape. I mean, that's, that's tough guy shape. Yeah, that's like world strongest man, but with no inhibitions for punching you in the face. The guy was a maniac.

That's prison. Oh, yeah, that's prison. But he's like a lot of the guys today. You can't, I can't picture George St. Pierre getting into a fight in a bar. No, I just can't see it. Him. I see it all day long. Oh, yeah, I can picture that. No problem.

You know, me bar fights, he's been in. That's, yeah, all, even when he was in the octagon, it was a bar fight for him. He's got no teeth, dude. All that shit got knocked out. He was one of the, he was one of my favorite fighters back in the day. Yeah, he was a soldier's shit now, though, man. Jesus Christ. Christ still fuck me up.

I'll fuck us all up. Yeah, that was when UFC was the shit. Yeah, he was a soldier shit now though, man Jesus Christ. Christ still fuck me up. I'll fuck us all up. Yeah. That was when UFC was this shit. Yep, UFC one. You do fight? No. You do anything? No, I've done jujitsu for stretches at a time.

You work out of course. Oh yeah. Are you big in the gym? I'm big everywhere. Hey, give me a pat. I got like that. I've been working out since I was 14 years old. Really?

No shit. I was a fat kid. I was a fat kid too, man. I was leaving a fat adult sometimes. Oh really? So you got a food thing? Oh yeah. Dude, my first fat was sixth grade.

First fat. My first stretch of fatness. Yeah, my first, my first fat was sixth. Yeah. Well, I was, would you do say you were six or in six grade? Six grade. So I was six. I pulled up on the playground with no shirt on. And some kid that comes, some kid yelled out, Resh has boobies. And it fucking, I just wanted to implode. What'd you do to them? Nothing. We just went back and ate cereal. Just back in front of the three. Yeah. Yeah. I ate the pain away. Which made it worse. I know, dude. I fucking, I'm hoping this is my last fat. You know, I got it. It's

so I relate. I just relate so much. I have in shapes and then fats. I have five skinnies and six fats. And it's, and I remember him, dude. I remember, let's go through him. I'll go through my first fat with six grade. Right. My second fat was when I got sober, yeah, when I went in for rehab, I put on some weight.

Yeah. And then when I got out, you know, I, you know, I was out like 14 months later. I was out of rehab and I started, went back to school and I took it off. And then my third fat was, oh, Jesus Christ, senior year high school. Or right after seeing you. Wait, how old were you when you got sober? I was sober when I was 15. Wow. Are you drunk? You drugs?

I've been sober since I was 22. No shit. Yeah. What made that happen? Alcoholism, bro. Was it bad? Oh, yeah. Really?

I just had a dream last night about getting high. Oh, you had 20 years later. So real ones? Oh, yeah. Yeah, people don't know this that when you get sober every once in a while you'll have a dream I had a dream and you dream like you drank. Oh, yeah, for sure your sobriety's gone You got to call your sponsor dude. I had a dream in the dream in a dream That's fucked. I woke up in the dreams drinking dreams. Yeah, and I was like oh God

Thanks, and then I just went good I was like no, and then I woke up and my mom was just like you find it said I was like, oh, God, thanks. And then I just went, good. I was like, no! And then I woke up and my mom was just like, you fine, it said I was like, thank God. Oh, thank God, and there was coke, and I was like, and then I woke up and my wife was like, thank God, it was terrifying. I used, I woke up and I was like,

I actually, I gotta get a new surprise. You don't know what fucking reality is anymore, at that point. Not worth a while. Yeah, the dreams are the worst dream or the most emotionally taxing dream I ever had. I woke up and I in the dream I was trying to, because when you're sober, everyone knows you, knows that you're sober, knows you don't drink, you don't do drugs. And I was trying to think, who do I know in my life that I know well enough to ask, but

also doesn't care about me at all and will tell me where to get drugs. Right. And I woke up from that. I was like, that sucked. Terrifying, man. Yeah. Who do I know that doesn't give a shit about me at all and will help me get high?

I got three autistic kids over here. Yeah. Fuckin' they don't care about you. They'll get you high. How long you takin' with you somewhere? Yeah. I mean, it doesn't even need to be. Great adventure.

Oh dude, though, I can be fuckin' bonch on chicken. Jucky cheese. Yeah. I mean, it doesn't even need great adventure. Oh dude, I can be fucking bonch on chicken. Chuckie cheese. Yeah, I can be Korean fried chicken in the midtown. Chick-fil-A, wherever you go. Yeah, you want to just go to a barbecue at your family's house and don't fuck. Am I right? Yeah. I mean, these guys just like being around people. Bro in your life. Um, I like, so is this all you do is the, yeah, this is it, man. How did you fucking whip the? How did you do? What did you do before this everything? I mean, I've had as many jobs as you could possibly think of But what I was doing right before this was selling fence for a friend of mine. He had a fence company

Yeah And I was doing fine. I was doing great. I need self-fence. What I'm the guy. I'm the guy. Are you coming to my door? No, no, no, you call us. I call you. You call the company. You make an appointment. I can see you. Hey, all right. Hey, guy, can you come see me?

All right. I need a fence. Okay. Yeah. How you doing? All right. How's it going? How are you? Nice to meet you.

What's your name? And then you say. What's your name? I'm George. Nice to meet you. I'm Tang. Nice to meet you. And then you as the customer say, I'm so glad you're here. No fucking called for companies nobody showed up We go. Yeah, cuz they're all crackheads. I'm gonna say this ready. I'm like good. I got four quotes. Yeah, it's the best one

Well, that's a lie. I know that first right off the bat. Don't call me a lie. You cock so I can get a Fuck okay, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I was in the character. No, no, no, all right in your head. You know, I'd all right all right All right, let's go do it again. I have four people. Yeah, yeah, well what kind of material they given you to give me the PVCs and the Listen obviously I'll take a look at the quotes. Okay, this one's 7500 75 this one's 72 72 I like that one's 8000. Yeah, it's a little too high. This one's 65. I'm gonna be at 83 what? I'm just gonna explain to you why. Dude, the 63. 63.

Yeah, $6300 is a lot of money. Yes, it's a lot. So is 75. It's more. So is 83. 83's a lot more. But 83 is gonna feel like 10 bucks when you never have to call us again

to come back and fix the fence. You're gonna have, I'm not, I don't wanna talk bad about other companies, but. Okay. Just do your research, go on Google, look at the reviews, find out you do the same for us Yeah, and call me when you've done that. Yeah, and we'll come back and do your fence whenever you want. No problem. I'll just do it. Yeah, exactly I don't know, I don't know, I'll do any research. I lied. These are all, these are fake quotes. I made these up before you showed up. Yeah, yeah, I do it. I lied, these are all, these are fake quotes. I made these up before you showed up. Yeah, I do it.

Make me do it. So then how did you go from that to doing what? And okay, I know you don't want it. You can't describe what you do, right? Because it's a lot of things. I make memes for a living, but that's a part of it. You got to tell, I look, I know. Nobody knows what a meme is, Robert.

Yeah, we can't explain this. Because they said it and we all want to, okay. Yeah. And then I hired a fucking autistic Jew to make, make me memes. And he looked down his feet and he said, okay, you got to get an autistic Irish guy. Really? Yeah. Why, what does a meme do?

What's a meme, dude? A meme is an easily ingestible form of information, whether it be comedy, information, news, whatever. Used to be just comedy, okay. But the definition is obviously expanded since the art form or whatever you want to call it. Has, I say art form. Art is reached into all aspects.

All aspects of the legs. Yeah. Art form. Put on your ass, God. It's an art form. It's an art form. Oh, sure. I actually started wearing a bandana

like a puppy that just got in the room. Like, deaf leopard? Yeah. Fucking queen. What are you doing, dude? We went out to Montalk and all three. It might mean my two sons got bandanas. Oh, they've started wearing them.

Yeah, bandana. Wear around the neck. I put it around my head. All right, don't do that on Fire Island because that means another thing. I'm ready for that, too. Oh, really? Oh, yeah.

You're gonna bang some dudes. Me and Chris DeSteffan, I'll go there on the weekends. Hey! We're getting controversial. We're getting controversial. We're getting controversial. You're talking about autistic kids. Like, like, a sex. You have a wife, right?

Yes. Oh, thank God. Yeah. Yeah. So I was making, I was selling fans driving around in between appointments. You have a lot of time. Yeah.

And I was just, I was obsessed with comedy since I was a child since I was a kid. Right. I mean, I might be making this memory up so I don't want to call it my first memory, obsessed with comedy since I was a child since I was a kid. Right. I mean, I might be making this memory up so I don't wanna call it my first memory, but I remember hearing an album. It was Bill Cosby or somebody like that who had a record that I played at like eight years old

and I was like, what the fuck is this? It's the funniest thing I've ever heard in my life. Like, it was probably cause me. And we all had the cause me thing. Yeah. And then, and then I saw a full frontal comedy, which was a show that had Joe Rogan and Dom Arreira on it. I remember that unbelievable show. Dom Arreira was the funniest person I'd ever seen in my entire life. And then it just grew from there. And then I was like, I think I want

to try comedy. But I, you know, living in Long Island and I just, I never got bit by the comedy bug where you go up on stage. I've done comedy, I've done it for a couple of years at a time, but I just don't love it the way I think you need to love it to make it your entire life. You get, it's gotta be your fucking... Everything.

It's gotta be your wife. Yeah. You know, comedy was my wife for 20-something years. Yeah. And I finally, you know, when I had my kid, I realized, okay, I can back off a little bit, but yeah. Comedy, stand up comedy was the first,

and all, you know, number one position for a long time, and it affected everything. Effective family, it affected. Negatively or just indifferent? Not negatively, you know, it was just just all I wanted to do was stand up. Time in my living, that's my friends. I love my chick, but I would do stand up before anything. I'd talk vacations. I didn't do any of that. It was like stand up, stand up, stand up before anything. Like, fuck vacations.

I didn't do any of that. It was like stand up, stand up, stand up. We go away once a year through a Rubo. Yep. Other than that, if I got a gig, I'd cancel whatever the fuck I had to cancel, you know? Yeah. I've lightened up on that a lot now

because I have a kid and a family and a life. So, you know what I mean? I'll, that's the most important thing now, you know. And you can ease up a little bit and not have it all crumbled down because you have such a strong foundation. I built, here's a trick I think the life. You can build a foundation,

but don't over, you know, you can get a, you can get a house that you can afford, get it. Yeah. You can get all the shit you want. Yeah. You know, all the shit you want. You know, and just, you know, and, but it may not be a mansion. Yeah. Maybe a nice house.

Yeah. Where, you know, if shit does go fucking fucked for a minute, you're good. Yeah. You don't want a panic. And I mean, as, as a comedian or a comedy geared person, I mean, worrying is part of the deal. It's part of the deal. It's part of the makeup. Yeah, and worrying is the worst.

And not being able to say no is the ultimate. Having to say yes to somebody, when you really don't want to do it, to do stand up at a place you don't want to be because you know it's shit. And the people don't ask holes. And it's the worst thing, for me, the worst thing I could possibly fucking do. So I was doing stand up when I was 23 at the New York comedy club.

I did it for like a year. Yeah. And I remember looking at Brian Regan's schedule for his tour date, when he was coming around New York because I wanted to go see him. And I was looking at his schedule and I was like, it's fucking guys, never home, ever. Nope.

That's like best case scenario. You become a wildly successful touring comedian, and you're living in a hotel out of a suitcase. And even at 23, I didn't want that. So I eased up on it, and then I still have this thing inside me that thinks that I want to do it, but I was just talking to somebody today. I don't, I want to want to do it.

Something inside me wants to do it, but I don't think I actually want to do it. Yeah, but dude, bring up his Instagram. I mean, your Instagram is hugely popular. How many Instagrams do you have? Three. You get three, and why three? What, what, what, what,

tanks to not try started first? Comedy, you know, comedy, how many followers do you have? Three million. Jesus Christ. Point one million. I mean, it's crazy. And you have to use these in a certain way, right?

Yeah, you have to keep it fresh. You gotta keep people interested for sure. I mix it now, so I didn't do, I didn't repost anybody's memes for years, I made all my own stuff. And then I was like, you know what, I wanna, like, not give people shine, but I remember having a smaller page and somebody with a big page would repost me and it felt fucking Incredibles like seeing your name on the marquee, you know, oh, it's big man

But the thing you know people do is that there is a I do this on this page if I do something else Yeah, people hate it. Oh, I don't get it. Bucks Well, like they talk about this algorithm the algorithm is not aient being. It doesn't hate you or want you to succeed. It just gives feedback based on what people are saying. Well, how the fuck do you, I mean, so I suck. Yeah. So do I. It's okay.

You fucking hate it. So here's, here's, I'm going to take it. That's your point. Here's, we're back in. Here's the deal. Do you think about me? No, it's not you.

Thank you for the compliment. It's the deal. I have, no, it's not you. Thank you for the compliment. It's not you. I have been in a position where I'm posting stuff, it's dying. I post, I delete it, I post something else, I'm not, and then I start texting my meme friends. I'm like, is Instagram down for you? Or are you fucking, is it working?

Or what? And then I'll post something new, and then it takes off. I'm like, oh, I fucking suck. It's funny because I, Danny, Danny, I mean, I'd be like, what are we doing? What are we saying? Nobody knows.

And it's like, it's wild. I mean, you gotta admit, there's gotta be somebody in the background fucking with you. No, dude. Why is my shit not more popular? It's me. Ask the people. I hate who are these fucking people? They're your No, dude. Why is my shit not more popular? It's me. Ask the people. I hate who are these fucking people? They're your followers, dude. It's so the thing I've been to Instagram and

like corner them and ask them this question. I've been to have 770 Broadway. I got the fuck out and said what the fuck is going on? Got in there on a like a Trojan horse. Like I just want to talk about Instagram in general. Right. Then been like what's happening in the Trojan horse. I just wanna talk about Instagram in general. Right. And then been like, what's happening in the background? Right. I gotta know. What they say.

The number one problem is that people follow too many people. So the Annie, unfollow everyone. Yeah. Including my mom, the average person follows, this was back then also, this was like three years ago. You're supposed to follow a lot of people. You do whatever you want, but you're just not going to see everything. So the average person follows 1400 people. Okay. That's absurd.

Like there's no way you could possibly. How many people do I follow Danny? I think you follow like 3000. I also think you're misinterpreting what he's saying because he's saying the problem is other people. Did you just call me stupid? I heard that. Yeah. Well, I think I would have used the different word, but yeah.

All right. Go ahead. He's stupid. He's saying stupid. He's saying stupid. You're stupid. Memes that stupid, stupid. No, he was about to say something nice about me.

Go. Okay. He's saying that people in general follow too many people. So they follow you plus three thousand, thousand other people so they don't see your things. Yeah. You're not following too many people, so they follow you plus three thousand other people so they don't see your things. Yeah. You're not following too many people

for other people to see you. So people who follow me follow too many people. Everybody follows too many people. So how do I get the people that don't follow people? How do I make it? How do I become famous? All they want before I die? Bobby, this has become famous on Instagram.

You're an, I want a million. You're an incredibly successful, well-respected stand-up comedian. Cut that, take that, that's a clip. Back. Yes. What else do you need? Put that into.

Yeah, I need three million people on Instagram. It died. So I've seen things before where this new show Outer Banks came out, right? Yeah. And everyone on the show, their Instagrams exploded. Really?

And they're getting, you know, the ratio is not right. Like I'm pissed off at the ratio. I'll tell you a story that I think you'll appreciate. When I started Tanks Good News, it was exploding, growing very fast. My engagement on it was through the roof. I love that word.

I love that word. I love that word engagement. Engagement. Engagement. It's like a crowd full of people laughing. Everyone's laughing. I like it because it's like from Star Trek. Yeah, I'm huge.

I'm engaged. So I said to my friend Adam. Oh, great hot. Sorry, go ahead. I was complaining to him. I had to make the nerves happy. Okay. I was complaining to him about my engagement on Tank Sinatra

as compared to Tank's Good News. Yeah. And he looks at me, he goes, dude, what are you fucking losing to yourself? What are you talking about? Yeah. Take the win and move on. Yeah, but I hate this. What I hate about fucking Christ. I hate about people who are popular on Instagram. Yeah. And they're like, dude, don't it? It's not, it's nothing. It's like

there's something going on, Tank. And you're in the Illuminati. So I've also fucked myself. Do you want to hear how? You're're gonna show me, show me video. Yeah. Shutter cameras off. I started another page called Influencers in the Wild. Yeah. And this was a time when everybody was complaining about growth. Right. They, Instagram, they, meaning Instagram,

yeah, started to use my page as a piece of evidence that it is still possible to grow a page. And they did it against me. Because I said to them, I'm like, I'm not growing. What's happening? Is there no suggested, is the explore page not working? They're like, your page just grew to a million in three weeks. I don't really, you know, I don't know if you have a like to stand on talking about growth. You don't. I know. I got 116. How many people? I don't say, don't say it with that tone say don't say it with that tone.

Don't say it with shit tone. You have 116,000. But those are that's 116,000 fans of yours. I want non fans from the Philippines. I don't want people don't care about me. I want people to look at my number. I mean, you can oh Bobby has a lot of people. You could make that happen tonight. How? Just by followers. Oh, you I can't want people to look at my number. I mean, you know, Bobby has a lot of people. You could make that happen tonight.

How? Just buy followers. Oh, I can't do that. I remember. I'll tell you, we did this podcast a long time. So you don't want it. Hang on, let's check it. Yeah.

These, we did it over there. And Eric Rivera. What, get us a, but he just pulled up. Get us a key. What the, somebody go tell that fucking person in that car to stop it. He's selling platanos. So it's funny, I see Eric Rivera and all of a sudden

fucking a Guatemalan party bus. It's him. I was by. So he's over here. He was on a TV show, some whatever, NBC show. And he went from like 800 followers to 25,000 falls in a weekend. Yeah. And Pete Davis called them out on who was it? It was Eric Rivera. Oh, Eric Rivera. And Pete Davis and called them out and just

he's like, dude, you bought followers down. Yeah. And I felt so bad. But he did. He wanted, oh, he did? Yeah, he wanted to get in, well, cause NBC wanted him to have more followers. Oh, so they paid for his followers? For his followers, yeah. I get people all the time in my DMs, these scam bullshit selling followers things. Yeah. And they're like, we can help grow your page and blah, blah, blah.

And I look at their page and they have like 500 followers. I want to be like, fuck you. I have five million followers on this page. Why are you telling me how to do something? So you wake up, this is what you do. You wake up in the morning and write these things. Write, you have three different pages? Three different pages, yeah.

And each page, one page, tanks and outro, what's the other page? Tanks and outro, tanks good news. And what is the tanks good news about? Tanks good news is just all good stuff that happened during the day because everyone knows where to get That's the one please go there. I want to hear one

Just I think I believe it was right there with the other page Yeah Thanks good news. You see it So this the most recent one I posted is good so this is tell me what this is so this woman called the meme right It's a meme format a meme format, which is what this is. So this woman, this is called the meme, right? It's a meme format. A meme format, which is what? This news story is a meme format. It's a single image square text and image.

Text and image, okay. What's the little smiley face for? That's my Thanksgiving news logo. It looks like you. Yeah. Okay. Balls, thank you. It does.

It looks like you a little smiley. Okay, after months inside a 90 degree house, a Kansas symbol was, woman was given a new AC unit. Reav charge. So, this guy took her for five grand AC unit. He put it in, it never worked. She was sweltering in her house. Some guy heard about it and gave her a new AC unit

for free. Some random guy, stranger. Wow, that's around $10,000. So things like this that happen that is never gonna be on Fox or CNN or MSNBC because it doesn't piss people off. I have a page dedicated to that. And you write about it. You don't, that seems like something you'd go on

and your bald head would come up behind on a green screen. Today, blah, blah, blah. Why would you not, why would you not do that? Why is it just text? I've thought about it and I've done it. And what? It's just a lot of work. I mean, everything is a lot of work.

Is it? I have so many different things going on. Yeah. And I don't have anybody that works with me. Uh huh. So it's all you. It's all me, yeah. Really?

So I just started a new podcast, a true crime comedy podcast with my friend, Dave's wife. She does all of the work. I just come in and be the idiot in the room and make jokes and make fun of her and derail and go on tangents, but she does all the work for the podcast. Something like that, I can take on because there's like another person, but like that's the only new thing I've done in two years, probably. I just don't have the bandwidth for,

I need to nap twice a day, I gotta go to the gym, that's the shape of my head. You gotta see I have a life. Yeah. So now you go in here, go to the Taylor Swift thing. Click on this.

Oh, this was a big story, too. How many people saw this? How many people saw it? Yeah, how many people saw it? Yeah, how many people viewed it? You don't have to answer that. I have three guys over there. Well, they can't see my analytics.

60,000 people liked it. 60,000, oh, there you go. That's all I wanted. Okay. 67,000 likes. So, thank the truck drivers on her era's tour. Taylor Twist gave each of them a hundred K bonus. And what do you need now?, so that's the get ya,

that's where it's all checked us out. Yeah. And then they go into the text. Yeah. Where you wrote what? Read that. As a way of saying you, stop acting as they got three autistic kids. Stop staring at your shoelaces and read it. There. As a way of thanking the truckers who made her ares tour possible singer Taylor

Swift gave them each a hundred thousand dollar bonus. Look fair wage doesn't put you in a position to buy a home, but this opens up the possibility. Said Michael, uh, Strecked, Bob, uh, Shurkin back. Shurkin back. The founder and CEO of the Denver based trucking company, uh, some ocean. Uh, people report that Swift paid a total

of $55 million in bonuses to our poor crowd. So let's read the first, miss the, then Marie, Athena Marie. Athena Marie, I lose you that. Also, also almost every city that she stopped in, she has donated sizable amounts to local food banks, can confirm that here in Santa Clara County, her donation was enough to feed at least 500,000 people.

Wow. Liked by eggs tyrone. I mean, so, and this, so this is a new one you did. Yeah. And so this is where people can go and get good news. Yes. Cause they know where to get the bad news, everywhere else, literally everywhere else,

is all bad news. So there's no bad news on here. I mean, every day you have to do this every day? Oh yeah. Twice a day or once a day. At least once, usually twice sometimes three. So you're homing for content. Yeah.

For this alone, every single day. Everything. I haven't taken a day off in seven years. Jesus Christ. But it's not, I'm not working. Like when I worked in restaurants, I worked. When I worked at, you know, at the bagel place that I worked at, or the, when you're in the mafia.

When I was in the mafia, I mean, I had to produce. Yeah, you had to produce, get that money. I Irish mafia. Kick that shit up. Exactly. Still in cigarettes, whatever. You're gonna get $100,000 bonus. But so the so what's the other? It's a joy, dude.

Influencers in the wild. That one is just a fucking. And how many? That has a million people. Five million. I hate my life. I am a life. If you fucking conksucker's don't get me

seven million people by tomorrow, you're all fired. But but I'm serious. I'm serious. If it was a little island is this five minute buddy, that's so me but now are these so you get these people that Oh, that's a good one that one with the check in the check what is it in the black? This is people out in public Creating so this is not your content. No, this is her con she bumped into some guy because she was it in the black? This is people out in public creating. So this is not your content. No, this is her content. She bumped into some guy because she was dancing in the middle of the street.

Go home. No, please let there be a taxi cab that smushes her and a tip falls out too. I want her boob to fall out right there. Oh, sorry. What an ass. Yeah. So you rights tail swift anti-hero. Okay. So you write an ass. Yeah. And you, so you writes Taylor Swift anti-hero, okay.

So you write this stuff. Yeah. So you put that up, how many, that got 57,000 likes, right? I just reposted my favorite video ever. Go down, down. That girl with the roller blades. Down, down, down, down.

She ricks hump, down. Okay. Keep going. That was a good one, but that's not the one I'm talking about. down down down down down. Okay keep going. That was a good one but that's not the one I'm talking about. Down, down, down. I'll know it instantly when I see it. It's not that right there right there 127,000. This guy is just his face is fucking incredible. Smiling for a picture done with He's fucking done with all of it. That's probably the 80th picture they've taken at brunch that day. I was the same face my wife makes afterward done having sex. Thanks, Bobby. Yeah. So it's a fun life, you know, it's a good time. You stumbled upon this. Yeah. You

were right place, right time when the Instagram was taking on how do you make money off of that because they took away monetization. I never had monetization on Instagram. So how do you make money, dude? People will advertise on my pages. Not people, companies will advertise. How? On the pages.

How do they find me? Yeah, they email me. Well, okay, so they email you. I get those emails. I've never responded. Who are you getting emails? Facebook. What do you mean?

I don't know. Okay, we want to advertise on your pay. Oh, no, no, no, that's not real. Where they want to give you $7,000. Yeah. That's not real. Are you sure? I mean, because I'm mean with the guy tomorrow.

See what happens. Where? Bangladesh? No, it's on the 150th Street. Be careful. Why? He said it's in the apartment building. In the back.

Yeah. By the left. Down the back by the left. Yeah. No, I wouldn't. I wouldn't. No. Okay. Yeah. All right. No, I'll get, you know, like if there's a TV show that's coming out or a movie or an app that people want, you put it in the thing. Yeah. Yeah. How? I haven't done an ad on here in a while. You'd have to scroll down, but this is my favorite page to do ads on influencers in the wild. Okay. Cause it's just fun. Like it's just, but there's rules to this game. Oh, yeah, you can't be dirty. You can.

But I don't like to be. I'm not like a dirty guy. You know, I mean, other publicly. I'm not. Look at that. Ask. Yeah. I mean, I'm not, I'm, I respect women.

Zuma on her fucking butthole. Is she sniffing the other goes, bum, what's going on with all this? But this you open yourself up to, no, she's just sticking her ass against the glass. It just looks funny. She looks like a fucking, like a manatee putting their face up against her. So you make money from companies.

Yeah. That will be like, all right, we're gonna give you this much money to advertise on your pages. Yeah, all three pages, usually one. One page, they're like one page. Cause it's all different stuff. So how do you put it in that you sneak it in?

I sneak it in, yeah. How? I mean, I incorporate, I shouldn't say sneak it in cause I do disclose that it's an ad. But I incorporate it. Hey, I got my water here. I want you to sell my water and you add. How do you do it?

Depends on which page. I want it on the influences of the wild. I would just have some girl in a bikini stand in the middle of time square and pour This all over herself and make sure you got Poland spring in the shot. Okay, do it on your tank tank Sinatra I would have to know a little bit more about their charitable initiatives Really? Yeah, cuz I'm I have to do something real. I can't make something up. Why they gonna be chairs It's just water. I want to make something up. Why are they gonna be chair? It's just water. I wanna make a million dollars off of water

that you can get out of your sink. Poland's doing fine, but usually companies will have something that they want people to know about, but they don't wanna tell, it's like a PR move, you know what I mean? So you only do social media. Yeah, I quit my job selling fence at the end of 2017. Wow. I do need a fence, so you got any connections?

Of course, I'll hook you up with Joe, Victorian fence. Nah, but is he gonna fuck me with the 8,000? No, no, no, no, it's gonna be less than that. He will overcharge you though. He will? Yeah, fuck you. But you'll love every second of it. I don't sell people the best salesman I've ever seen in my life.

He actually got some guy to get up from his table and run to get his Checkbook one time. I'd never seen anything like it in my life. It's not gonna happen with me. Did you buy a lottery ticket? By the way, I did me too. I have a tonight. Yeah, is it tonight? It's 1.56 is it over? Is it happening now? I don't know. I got the ticket in my pocket though. Tonight? I'm sure it's tonight. No, I'm not, I don't know how it works. When is the... I actually bought a lottery ticket in Montsook and fucking lost it. When is the mega billions? Mega millions is...

No, the mega, okay, it's tonight, right? Well, it's mega billions now. Yeah, it's what I, mega billions. Used to be millions. The jackpot's pending. Okay. Was it August 4th? August 1st, which is last time.

No, no, nobody won that. So why August 4th? August 1st, which is last. No, no, there's nobody won that. So why is it pending? Why is it pending? They probably got a nice way. Is tonight? Let's pick a number right now, dude, ready? No, it's 915. They would, no, wait, when do they do it?

10. No, no, no, let's pick a number. 1 to 6, you go. 5th. Okay, I'm gonna go 17. Pick another number. 32. Okay. I'm gonna go 17. Pick another number. Uh, 32. Okay, I'm gonna go 46. Pick another number. 55. Oh, I like this ticket. 1 to 25. Go. 7. I like that. All right, add to that.

I feel like that was divinely inspired. It's a good one. Artistic, artistic 3. Pick a number. 23. Artistic 3. 23. Another one. good one artistic artistic three pick a number 23 or just three 23 another one go again 12 go 41 go 18 one more one to 25. nine. Got it. At the cart. I didn't feel that it feels good. It's hours. No, but they probably won because they're connected to God more because no, we are now there. I channeled God direct. God fucked up on them. Yeah. So he's like, I shit. Those guys I thought, all right. Yeah, I didn't know they would make it. When is it? It's the next drawing is, oh today 11 PM.

Nice. Dude, listen brother, if we won, oh you want to hear what? Let's stop. If we win the billion, it's one, I think it's 1.5 billion. 1.56 when I bought it today. Okay, so 1.5, you have to delete all your Instagram accounts. Gladly. And make it on my Instagram.

Gladly. So I can get all your followers for one day. I will give you my Instagram pages. You can have it. 100%. How funny would it be if I pretended to be you? See you later, dude. Maybe like.

Hey, how you guys doing? It's me. I know I look a little chubby at the most here. And a little older, but I'm here. Yeah. Thanks a lot to everybody. You call me George if you want. Let's take a look at this.

You get this. Pretty good. Let's take a look at this brought over here. Put your ass up against a fish tank. Oh, dude, I give anybody. I give it all, but you want to hear what an asshole I am. I don't never play the lotto. So I don't know the words that you words that you know what I mean like the fucking

Straighten oh tell you meant if you want no no no so usually you say something nice to the person you bought it from like if I you know Yeah, if I win I'll give you a million dollars or whatever while I was buying the lottery ticket the light over our head went off Yeah, it just broke the lottery ticket the light over our head went off. Yeah. It just broke. But put it in this shitty gas station. And I go, if I win, I'll fix that light. And he goes, have a good day.

Yeah, because you didn't like that at all. You could fix the light now. I could, with your Instagram money. He's a shit. It's true. It's true. What's, bring up the difference between a millionaire and a billionaire. I think a millionaire, uh, this's true. It's true. What's, bring up the difference between a millionaire and a billionaire.

I think a millionaire, uh, this is it. Oh, it's a third. Did you see that? I've got that. That Instagram thing. That was crazy. Bring up the difference. There's a video on Instagram where the guy's,

it breaks down, because people don't understand the difference between a million seconds is like 17 days. And a billion seconds is 37 years. Yeah, something like that. Some crazy shit like that. Yeah, okay, don't do it because he did it. Unless you do find it, then show us.

But if I said the wrong thing, then don't say it. Oh, here it is, right here, right here. Play it loud. If you earned $1, we're gonna put the headphones in. Every second. And you wanna become a million, a million. You would need 12 days of approximately. If you wanted to become a billionaire.

Billion. You would need approximately 32 years. 32 years. That's the difference. Let me show you something. Wow. Yes. I mean's the difference. Let me show you something. Wow. If you... Yes.

I mean, big difference. Big difference, but you don't think there is, because you think it's like, you know, you think it's just like 10, but it's a lot. No, it's a thousand million. Wow. Yeah. Could you imagine this thing goes nuts and keeps going to like

70 billion and the one person wins it and then Fucking solves all the world's problems or kills themselves within three months because away Yeah, I don't know dude lottery winners have a high suicide rate You know what that's because they're doing coke and fucking eat an asshole. Yeah, in third world countries I can't I don't have that option. I don't like it, because I'm sober. I can't do coke. Yeah, but you know, we could do. And give me enough money.

Yeah, fucking dude, me and you, I mean, do we create like an island of just bald guys where we can drink on the weekends? No, we can't drink. But I can drink the fuck out of that. So we're gonna work out the fucking dump our wives and the fucking, that's your big dream is to get all of us dudes who are bald on an island no chicks

How great with that? I said I said no our chicks. Oh, okay new chicks Like we all get five chicks, but what about our wives? Yeah, then come on weekends. Yeah, that's the weekend deal You think you think our wives would give a fuck we make a white violent. So here my plan. Ready? We get two islands. Yeah. Two islands. We got the white filing. I like that. Then we got bald guy island. Okay. Me, you, the rock, Aaron Burzy, for Paul, whoever. Yeah. Burzy, Burzy, that Rogan can come, right? Yeah. Yannis will be there in a couple of years. If you want to come, you can come. You just got to shave your head. Yeah.

Yeah, that's the key. Yeah, Mateo's going to be able to be there in like 10 years. If you don't stop getting a space wig. Yep. Right? I mean, listen, ball guy island, it's just us. We as soon as you get on the island, white linen, white linen and every got ball guys gets five girls from whatever country he wants.

What countries? What five countries did you pick? You don't have to pick five. It can be all the same girl, but what countries would you have? What's the five girls? I'm from doing that right now. Money, my wife, my child. Yeah.

Yeah, I'm a thousand there. I'm not a millionaire. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If I was a billionaire, yeah. Ball guy, island. Ball guy, island. What countries would you, what girl, what type of girl would you have from what country? Five girls, where do you get them from?

America. What? America. What? America. No Filipino. No. No Hawaiian.

No. No Brazilian. Maybe. Puerto Rican. Puerto Rican. Puerto Rican. Croatian Czechoslovakia. Yeah, that now we're in. Which country would you get?

Yeah. You fucking dirty communist. What? What? How you go from Russia? Barrio. Exactly. China.

Old Germany. Like when it was a wall. Yeah, that wall. These sides. Yeah. Got the bad side, but we're not. I don't know a lot of countries. that. That wall, the east side. Yeah. Got the bad side, but we know a lot of countries. I haven't been a lot of places, but Brazil, I know is like, I'll do it.

I get Puerto Rican, I get Brazil. I would get, I wouldn't get Japan. I love Japanese girls. I would go, I'd probably go maybe like, you know, like Vietnamese or. What? Mm-mm-mm. Are you, did you just go deaf? That's Vietnamese.

Oh, I thought you went deaf. Oh, I'm not going to be an angel. Yeah, dude, somebody like those girls who eat like fucking spiders, they fried spiders. Yeah. Just to chest what you want, I would get, that would be three. It's for fun.

Yeah. Then I would get, I would definitely get an Italian. Like a cook fucking Italian. Yeah, yeah, hot. I mean, smoking hot Italian. Yeah, smoking and then I would get a definite, I get an American girl, of course. She'd be the top. She's a culture.

She'd tell the other girls what's up. Yeah, and then let me think. Yeah, the last girl, I probably get to America. I probably get a blonde and a brunette. Yeah. Yeah, you look like you get a red head, though. Would you get it? Now, no, maybe, I mean, Jessica Chastain,

I'm a big fan of. Jessica Chastain, she's an actress. No, really. Yeah, I just saw her play, a Dolls house. What was that? It was one of those things where, I'm not her play, um, a doll's house. What is that? It was one of those things where I'm not like, you know, a culture rat. Oh, kind of guy. Like I know some things.

Oh, yeah. I was first of all, she's fucking. I'm great. First of all, you brought, if you brought that creature to my island, you kicked off. Yeah. Yeah, she can't even go on the sun. We'd have to, we'd have to cover her and fucking cook tonight. Laves off. Yeah. Yeah, she can't even go on the sun. We'd have to cover her and fucking. Coconut leaves.

Sumped it, dude. She is pale as they get. That's the chick from the Molly's game. Yeah. Peter Stellar. And the Osama Bin Laden. Zero, Dr. Thirty. Yeah.

Yep. Great actress. So I saw her in Dollshouse and it was so simple and so nothing to it. I was like bracing myself for how good the story was gonna be. And then at the nothing to it. I was like bracing myself for how good the story was going to be. And then at the end of it, I was like, the fuck did we just watch? And you want that? What did we just watch? You want her there on the island? I just wanted to bring that up. Okay. Yeah. You just wanted to bring up that you saw

the dolls house. Yeah, yeah. Because you wanted to be cultured. I also went to the opera ones. I already like you. I don't know what this is. Wait, what'd you say? I already like you, dude. We don't need to do this. Yeah, good. No, I did go to the opera, but we left. I don't like that you said, yeah, good.

Like I said, I want to suck your dick. I said, I like you. All right? Yeah, good. I won. Ha, ha, ha, ha. You gotta be with me. You guys have said you and me,

but he's also a very alpha male. You gotta be careful so well Wait, so you're not satisfied with your standing in the comedy space currently. What do you mean you want a million followers? Listen dude. Go. I know say you know what dude. You know what dude. Yeah, I you do watch Dude here's a deal. I was on MySpace. Yeah, I was, I was rocking it. Yeah, I was killing it.

How sad is that? Yeah, dude, and it fucking, it burns me, that I, when my thing, when my thing was happening, when I was the young, when we were coming to Torga, and MySpace, you had hair, bro. I heard it when you had hair. Dude, and I had a lot of fans, and I was into, I was into tacking websites.

I had the greatest website of all time. I fucking was on all this shit. And then, and my whole fan base that I created, yeah, was gone, which is sucked away. And it's like, I had to start over. It's there. And then I had to start over. It's there. And then I had to start over again. And now it's like, the game has changed so much.

And I'm, look, I'm 52. I can't, I don't have the ability to fucking, you know what I mean? It's like, I can't do it. I, look, I love making content. I'm a silly bitch with that shit. Everybody knows that follows me. I don't, I'll take a phone out and do something.

I like it. I do. I don't care. It's a guilty pleasure. You know what I mean? I like doing this shit. But I can't get, I'm, I mean, dude, I'm like using, I have ballerina shoes trying to get traction

on a fucking oily floor. Yeah. And it sucks when you see people, it's a weird thing. It is a competitive, I think the competitive of me. Yeah. You see these people just get traction and go. Yeah. And you're like, how do you do it? Yeah.

And then you get paranoid. Like, the fucking shit, oh, banning me. And then you talk to guys like you guys, it doesn't exist. There's no person. It's not a sentient being. What'd you say? It's not a sentient being. Yeah, it's not a person.

It's not out to get you. It's not out to get you. It's you. You suck. People sometimes sometimes you're great. I'm sure you have posts that do well unexpectedly. Not one. Nope. Bring it up. One. One exactly. I got a million on the million. What a million views. Let me see. Yeah. Yeah, that's fucking big. That's a big deal. Dude, it hurts though. Here's it hurts. Cause you get a million views and you're like, I did it. And then it's back down to reality. It goes, yeah, but it stinks. There's nothing better than that.

I don't need this in my life. Yeah, I don't want it. Is there a better high right now? Obviously, drugs notwithstanding, then having a fucking video that goes really well. How sad is that? I mean, it's a weird't it weird? They created a new drug. A hundred percent. And we don't even know that we're in it. We don't even know we're on it.

I know. I know. I know. I know you do. But I know guys. Yeah. Dude, I don't look at my I don't do social media. Yeah. Okay. And then and you see them. Yeah. Send a comment on something. How did you know that? Yeah. If you don't look at it, how did you know they said that about you? I know. It's like everybody's like drinking in the closet. It's true. Yeah. If you don't look at it, how did you know they said that about you? Yeah, I know. It's like everybody, like drinking in the closet. It's true. Yeah. And you see people looking, sorry.

I, Danny, you cock sucka. I was looking for a video that crushed, I'm sorry. You're not gonna find it, I was lying. Today's episode is brought to you by Ghostbed. A great night's sleep is important to anybody, not just comedians. Ghostbed makes premium mattresses at an affordable price, all designed for cooler and more comfortable sleep. Take advantage of a free and fast shipping.

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series, gremene, realitis y contenido infantil. Pluto TV. Ven a verlo, sin pagar nunca. ¿Sueñas con un futuro más allá de los estudios de grado? ¡Puerto TV! ¡Ven a verlo, sin pagar nunca! su beca en fundación la caixa.org. traten codere.es y crea tu apuesta. Codere más de lo que esperas. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Friday. It's great. Well, no, I mean, I went to go see Pantera. I was more a more of a Pantera guy Yeah, yeah, but the set list for Friday night Pales and comparison to fucking Sunday night. They played all the bangers on Sunday. They did I was upset They did and five finger death punch was awesome. Yeah, they were great Yeah, but I'm sitting there watching this thing and Number one, they're gonna to play a new song and

What's his name the lead singer there James had feelings was like, yeah, we're gonna do this probably they're probably you're probably not gonna like it But it was like wow, I looked at you go he's insecure. Oh, yeah, and then at the end of the thing we go I mean it's crazy The place is going nuts. Yeah. Man, I mean, it's nuts. They put on a great fucking show. So good. And we leave, I go home and around three in the morning, I'm looking in Lars.

He was like, hey, what's up, guys? Yeah, man, here's the thing. And what a great show. I just, he's doing all the shit with the talking to the fans where it's like, he's doing all the shit with it. Talk into the fans where it's like, yeah, man, you know, it's really and then you look away because you don't really what you're saying. Yeah, yeah. I just want to thank everybody. It's coming out here and it means a lot. And, you know, and I'm like, this guy just had 80,000 people

screaming. Not enough. It's not enough. No. He needed more. A little nightcap. It's a nightcap. It's a fucking dude. It's such a drug. It really is. Fame. Everybody gets a shot at fame now.

Yeah. And you, you know, and the fact that people might look at your shit and say it, say I don't deserve it. That's why I know that's what you want to say. I can feel it coming. I know.

I was not about what the fuck just did you just say that? Ins secure. Wow, man. No, I mean, but I was just thinking there's no more than you, but the thing I'm getting out of it. Of course you do. There's no time I was joking. There's no difference between somebody who's 17 years old,

doing that for the first time with their phone and Lars Ulrich they both feel the same discomfort the same discomfort But it's also the same high you get. Oh, yeah, it feels good to get people to like you That's why this influencer is in the wild page hit its truck such a nerve with people because I feel like Everyone knows what it's like especially a concert So you turn around at a concert to get a picture taken of you with a stadium or the stage in the background, and you gotta look at fucking, I don't know, 7,000 people, or looking at you.

I don't know anyone who doesn't feel stupid doing that, but then you got chicks and guys out in Times Square in the Runderwear, just acting like it's no big deal. It's like fascinating. It's a weird, we're in a very weird, because I have a kid too, how old are your kids? If it's 16 year old stepdaughter, 10 year old, then a five year old son.

10 year old, a lot. Was your wife, what was your wife though? She's an esthetician. My wife's in it, was. Is she, yeah. She was, she worked in New York for years. She was like, one of the top estheticians in Manhattan for years.

She worked at Maximus, Avalon. Is that why you named yourself Maximus? No, not at all. and then we were like talking about this name and that. And we were like Vincent and Rico. We're going all to a tie-in because it's high in his name. Their kids great. Anthony, great name to yell. We're talking about names. We're talking about names. We're talking about names. We're talking about names.

We're talking about names. We're talking about names. We're talking about names. We're talking about names. We're talking about names. We're talking about names. We're talking about names. We're talking about names.

We're talking about names. We're talking about names. We're talking about names. We're talking and Rico. We're going all to Italian because Italians name their kids great. Anthony, the great name to yell. To great name. We're talking about names to yell. Anthony. Yeah. So Anthony, just a good name to Anthony. What do you do?

I mean, it's just, and then Maximus. We, cause we love gladiator. The gladiator with Maximus, Decemus, Meridius. We always did that line to each other with Maximus, Decemus Meridius. We always did that line to each other. A Maximus Decemus Meridius. Yeah, it's just, and we lot, I was like, that's my kid's name. Yeah.

We were like, all right, whoever has a kid first. Oh, really? Yeah, and then he died. Thank God. Yeah. Because I had my kid, and I got to name my kid now. I was like, Jesus. I'm kidding.

And I said, yeah. Because I thought you were gonna say something after that. Yeah, like, Jesus. I'm kidding. And I said, yeah, because I thought you were gonna say something after that. Yeah, no, no. Yeah, no, I named. I'm sad that he never, I'm sad he never was around to see him, you know what I mean? To know that I named him Maximus in that conversation and not that he would have been gave a far key part, you know,

but he would have, he would have maxed what a love picture. Maybe he knows now. Yeah, maybe. I mean, he would have loved Patrice. Yeah., but he would have he would have maxed what I love, but maybe he knows now. Yeah, maybe I mean, he would have loved Patrice. Yeah. And Patrice would have loved max. Yeah. And you know, Patrice used to come over my house.

How old is your son? He's 10. Oh, yeah. It's a good age. I took him to Metallica. Really? Yeah, dude. Oh, that's fun.

Took him to Metallica. You know, he's a big, he loves music. He loves way more than me. I love music, but I'm not a fan of anything. I'm just not a, look, I love the Pats, I love the Bruins, I love the Red Sox. But I'm not, I'm not looking who's on the roster this year. I'm not a fanatic.

I'm not a fanatic, man, about anything. I love music. Me too. But I don't, I don't know everybody's fucking songs and I don't know everybody's names. I just love the song. I listen to it. My son, you know, he knows music. Yeah. Danny, if you move again, you're gonna lose a pinky toe.

You know who I just started listening to? I'm gonna lose a new one, John. Lana Del Rey. Fuck is that? Exactly. What is that? Very big star. Really?

Wildly talented. Right. My wife was playing her on the Alexa and I've been listening to Shenandoah Connor because she died. Yeah. So that's what I do. I soon as someone dies, I go, right to their Spotify, I screenshot that, how many plays they have. And then I check it again in like a week to see to see if there's a boost. Yeah. Uh, well, and a Del Rey dude, what a nice, she's like, you know, Dolly Parton is known as a great songwriter. Her and Willie Nelson wrote incredible songs. Yeah.

Just the melodies and the lyrics and all that. Lana Del Rey is kind of, she's up there. I didn't know this until I started listening to her, but she's really well respected as a songwriter. She looks very good. She'd be a little chubby too. I liked that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

She's not at all. She's born and raised in Manhattan. No shit. Yeah. Yeah, I checked that out. I love that. So you have to keep up on all this stuff. Yeah. I was just down stairs talking with Rachel and her husband. Yeah. And he said something to me and I and I just fucking just rattled back the answer. He was Lost in something and I was like, oh, it's this and I was like I said to him like I can't fucking wait till I don't have to know all this shit And I was like, oh, it's this. And I was like, I said to him, I can't fucking wait till I don't have to know all this shit.

I can't wait. I can't be, dude. I don't know when I win the lottery tonight. No, but like, like I look at what you do, it's like what I do, it's comedy. Yeah. Right, you're at a point right now where you make a money, you're doing your thing, you got a constantly evolve.

Yeah. You will constantly change. That's why the, what if Instagram goes to shit? Well, what if it's like my MySpace? I haven't thought about MySpace as something that people went through. I always think about Vine, because Vine people were making great money on. Dude, Vine?

And then it just disappeared. That's what I'm saying. MySpace. Vine. I know, I never even thought about MySpace. What can you do? Do you have a plan? So as soon as a new thing comes up a new tech, you're in it. Well, the advertisements have been slow.

Corporate America is in a weird space right now with the people who are not spending money. They don't know what's gonna happen. That's why I started the podcast. And that's doing fucking unbelievable. That's one of the, I love true crime. It's called psychopedia, you should check it out. What, what, what, what, like, what's the first one you do?

The first one, the first episode we did was about a priest who this guy's upbringing was insane, dude. He was raised in Germany. He used to, he found a friend to go to the slaughterhouse with him and they would mutually masturbate and jack each other off while the cows were getting slaughtered because they were into that. The love story. Yeah, then he cut off his mom was obsessed with the Catholic church. So she used to make him have, she used to make him do the episode is called Meet Me to

slaughter house. His mom used to make him do fake church set, you know, masses at the house. I'm dressed up at eight years old. So he cut off the head of a chicken, put the head of the chicken on a tip of his cock. And his dad found it because it was like first, they can have a cheesy beat the shit out of him. Just this upbringing is out of like insane.

If I found a chicken head on the top of my son's cock, I'd laugh for a second, but what if I keep doing? Yeah, put him in the hospital forever. Ha, ha, ha, ha. What if he was like, if he, all you had to do was go, Dad, why'd the chicken cross the road? Yeah.

A-h-ha. Biker. All you had to do was go, Biker. Yeah, so I started that because I don't know what's happening. I don't know if Instagram's gonna be, you know, lucrative forever. Yeah.

I don't know what's gonna, I have no idea what's working and what's not. So I just keep trying new stuff, some stuff works, lucrative forever. I don't know what's gonna, I have no idea what's working and what's not. So I just keep trying new stuff, some stuff works, some doesn't. Yeah, it's a, it's like podcasting, dude. Yeah. I mean, podcasting, you know, it's, some, you look at, like, why is that podcast so?

And they look, I've been doing this for a while, I got a great fan base, I love my fans. Yeah. But it never took off into like, you know, the gazillions. You look at some people's podcasts, and I listen to it and you're like, I just don't, I don't get why there's thousands. And I watch them like, okay, but you know what?

Yeah, it's working. People like it. People fucking like that one. Yeah. And whatever it is, and you know, I know. It's a weird business. It's a, it's a, it's just out there in in the ether and you don't know what the fuck it is. And when it's gonna happen is weird in general.

I was talking to my friend James about that with Metallica because they got obviously big before social media. They were, they were big, they were big, they were eighties early nineties. But they also had a video for one that I remember being on every two seconds. That's like the equivalent, I guess, of going viral back then that really put them on the map. Well, they would see the record companies were a control of fame. Yeah.

That's when they, when they dubbed you famous, when you came up and you, everybody was making money off of you. Yeah. Now, they don't make money. I literally follow a, I believe he's mentally challenged. Yeah. I'm pretty sure he's mentally challenged. He does a cooking show.

The Southern guy? No. Oh, is that the fat, oh, the skinny guy? Yeah, fat skinny guy with the fat, burn ends. Yeah, it's like, I'm gonna make burn ends. Yeah. Hey, today, hello, for the day we're gonna make burn ends. Yeah.

He has fat guy energy, but he's skinny now. Yeah. Yeah, I follow him. He also has like old energy, but he's young. This guy, no, this guy, no, not that one. That's not the reason. That is definitely a fat guy. Mentally challenged fat guy with a coach shot. That's not him, that's not the reason. That is definitely a fat guy. Mentally challenged fat guy with a cool shot.

That's not him. That's not him. That's not him. There's two of them. I didn't know there was two of them. No, it's a kid. It's on my page. Oh, I can tell you.

Danny, I'll send it to you. That is funny. Let me say something. Yeah, I'm going to show you where the fuck is he? Blah blah blah blah blah blah. I'm sorry. Where the fuck? God damn it.

I can't. Got it. Huh? What? You got it? You know who he is? The guy I'm talking about. The kid that I like.

He goes, put it in the bowl. That guy? Oh. All right. Okay. First of all, this is my, I watch him all day long. How many followers does he have? 97,000.

Okay, so I'm still above him. Thank God. Yeah. But I think he was like 10,000 yesterday. Okay, scroll down please. I want you to go to, I love when he does a prison meal. When he does a prison meal, he goes, scroll down please. I want you to go to, uh, I love when he does a prison meal. When he does a prison meal, he goes, don't go, he goes, I'm making prison spaghetti. Don't go to prison. Right there. No, in the middle, the middle, yeah, there right there.

Click on that, get the sound up though. Go back. Don't go to prison. Oh, we got to put the headphones in. Shit. I enjoy reactions. Sorry. Okay, go back, go back, go back. Please go back. You have, I love this kid so much. I love go back Please The bowl at this in the back away for 20 seconds into the bowl. Add this in the microwave for 20 seconds. Add a starboard into the bowl. Starboard. This is an microwave for 10 more seconds.

10 more seconds. Now we mix it. Now we found in the starboard. Add a starboard. Awe the stick. Add the stick into the bowl. Add more joy rancers into the bowl and we'll join ranches into the bowl Now we cover it with melted joy man. There's a how you make a shank and Go go back I mean I fucking watch him I got all my friends at the cigar bar my friend Paul G

He's a big guy like you a tie-in guy. I have him I can't stop watching it I send him the videos all the time I guys I'm gonna make I got make Play play play play the latest one play the latest one. There's he throws shit right at the thing Most we remove the meat from the crowd leg I the crab meat into the bowl Into the bowl. I made it into the bowl. I'm blood pumps into the bowl. I'm obey season.

Into the bowl. I pink saw into the bowl. I'm pep-o into the bowl. What says? Squeeze some lemon into the bowl. Wait. I'm the egg into the bowl. Here we go, ready?

Mix the orange and garlic. Wait Go ready Pampal All right, get them off. I can't we look pretty good Dude, I love this kid and this is here's the thing this kid I love this kid and this is here's the thing this kid This is why this is the crazy beauty of the internet and the fucking worst of it where this kid is I mean done Yeah, what's this kid gonna do If the if if Instagram doesn't exist. Oh, yeah, what's he gonna do? Who knows man, but now yeah this kid's fucking A7000 that's a lot of people. Oh, yeah love this guy. Yeah, right? Yeah, and he's getting bigger and bigger and he makes these videos It's unbelievable

You know, I mean who knows what he would have been doing before I know never have to find out He'd be fucking at the bank fucking looking lullipops. Yeah, or it's lies. It's the licking stance. I put in shit in the bowl. I wanna know what else goes into the bowl. Into the bowl. It is a ball. Into the ball. Pop pan. I fucking love him.

Yeah, for everybody. You've actually won awards to you won a webby award. Yes. Is that a website award? What is that? Yeah, webbies are like the Oscars for the internet. I won that a while ago where's my award you have a webby award where's my award uh behind the comedy so I'm from life

from the table hey someone get my award is that Phil Phil who handling yeah I feel yeah that was when they used to do the podcast up here uh there's my award oh nice what is that podcasting award Yeah, uh, this is my one. Oh nice. What is that podcasting award? This is my, uh, did you make that for yourself? No, the comedy awards 2012 best comedy app, Robert Kelly live. Listen to me. Oh, I told you before, dude, I mean my app guy made this app. Dude, it was, I was a comic with his own app. Yeah, I was like one of the first with his own app. Yeah. I was like one of the first ones to do it.

Innovator. Right? I'm telling you, I love this shit. I've loved all this shit for a long time. I mean, dude, you went to my calendar. It was a map with my head where I was. Yeah. And you clicked on it and went, ah,

and it shot out the date with Link's You Can Buy. Yeah. I mean, dude, I always, I love nerds. I love guys who can do shit. they can go in and write code, and you can say I want this and they can make it happen. I love that shit. But maybe something like that is waiting for you on the horizon.

You have no idea. I got an app part. It's the best part about life. You have no idea what's gonna happen. Now, you seem like a positive guy, dude. Yeah. You always like this? I mean, it comes with sobriety, I guess.

I don't have time or energy to be miserable. I know how to be miserable, right? Fucking negative and dark. I just don't, I just, I'm excited by life. Yeah. I think that the possibilities for anyone are endless. My favorite stories are like, you know, Morgan Freeman starting acting at 58, Anthony Hopkins winning

his first Oscar at 63 or whatever it was. And the, the, the Colonel chicken, the, the KFC guy making his first store at 72. Like late bloomer stories. I'm a late bloomer. I've always been. Yeah, me too, man. I love Lewis Black story. Like he may, he started at 50. Yeah. Is when he took off on the daily show. So, I mean, I'm 42. I got time until I'm dead. Really? I'm 52. I got time until I'm dead really I'm 52 I don't have that much time you got time I've left time that I did no you know, I've been talking about this with a couple of friends, but all really The inner monologue. Yeah, you know, I mean, oh, yeah, the inner monologue is the thing that

You know I didn't even know it was existing and I would look I mean it's huge Intermonologue is the thing that, you know, I didn't even know it was existing. And I would, I mean, it's huge. It's outside, I'd be like, what the fuck, man? Fuck that. He's fuck, what the fuck is he doing? What the fuck? Oh, what the, you know, it's out,

and then it would be inside, internal world. I would actually have fights or, and I saw this guy and he was like, just every time you have the inner monologue and it's negative or it's trashin' somebody or it's being fuckin' mean to yourself, it's always abusive. Was that Emmett Fox?

I don't know who the fuck it was. Was it an author? I don't know. Okay. I don't know. But I remember, he said, just change it from negative because it's always abusive, either yourself or other people.

Just change it to positive. Yeah. Just when you do it, have it and then out loud, change it to positive. Yeah. And just be like, okay, my, ah, there it is, I'm being, yeah. You know what, I'm grateful. You know, it's, I have a lot going on today,

but that's a good thing because I have not a lot going on at some times and that's a scary thing. Yeah, I'll make it through. This is great. Thank you. Universe. This is great.

Awesome. And people will not do that because it feels fake, but it's all fake or real, depending on what you repeat the most. Right. So I read this book, the untethered soul was the first one. Living untethered was the follow up. Right. So I read this book, um, untethered soul was the first one, living

untethered was the follow up. Okay. And it was like, give me the power of now, like Art Ole. I read some of it. Yeah. Most people do. Yeah. I read the power of now for, for like 15 minutes. Yeah. Yeah. If now was now, if you had, if you've been 15 minutes now, I did that. So he, so the guy in living untethered talks about, he's like, you know how I know my inner monologue is not me. That's not the real me because I don't even know what it's going to say next. And I was like, holy shit, man. I mean, I get blindsided by negativity at a nowhere, just like everyone else.

I don't take it seriously. I don't fucking know where it comes up. And I'm sitting there going, I am so grateful right now. Yeah. I mean, dude, the fact I get to work with Big J. Ocasin. Yeah. I mean, I literally, Dan was like,

I don't wanna do this anymore. And him and J. Willik, you wanna do this, dude? I mean, what the fuck? Yeah, who is he like coming? That's like amazing. But I'll sit there and be like, there's two or three or 70,000 people that don't like me doing it Yeah, you know a 30,000 of the fans are like fucking nom kidding. Yeah, I'm being negative joking wise

But yeah, I'm like dude. It doesn't matter man. This is this is where I'm supposed to be right now It is I'm not gonna. I'll have fun. There's plenty of people that alike. Hey man. I just like the show on a miss Dan Yeah, and I but I love that you guys kept it going. And you're not it was gonna be over. So you're, so there's people who listen to the show who are getting used to you, you're growing on it. And I'm sure that there's new fans that came there because you're on there that weren't there when Dan was there.

And here's the thing, I'm sure there's people that are like fuckbob, I'm not listening anymore. And I, I'm so sorry for that, dude. Yeah. Because I love the show before too. Yeah. But it's the way it is. You know what I mean? It's not a negative thing. Like I'm saying, like that dude, because I love the show before too. But it's the way it is. You know what I mean?

It's not a negative thing. Like I'm saying, I got my podcast, which I love doing. I hang out with these fucking young nerds, you know, who are funny. I've seen these guys become funnier, just stepping on the seller stage. Yeah. You know, my friends are fucking great.

I mean, I'm just like, Jesus Christ, I got my wife, I got my kid, we get to do what we wanna do. I mean, dude, some people don't get to choose what clothes they wear. Oh, I know. Some people have to wear what, I was looking at a bunch of guys walking on the street today, I'm like, these people are wearing what they have to wear.

Yeah. Not what they chose to wear. Can you believe that I chose this? I cannot. I know. You were one of Can you believe that I chose this? I cannot. I knew one of those people. When I walked in, I'm like, this guy needs more advertising. I have like eight of these shirts.

They're my favorite shirts. The problem is the pocket is too small for the size of you. I'm a little autistic with clothes. Like I'll find a shirt that fits me and then just go by like 20. Same way, dude. I only like, I wear shirts like this, like merch shirts, but then I am true classic.

Yeah. I'm true classic, these pants are true classic. My t-shirts are all true classic. My underwear, true classic. I only shop at Dix. You love Dix? I love Dix. Can you get that and put that as the promo?

Clip it. I love Dix. I love Dix. How many Dix? Spend all my time in Dix. You love Dix. I love it so much. I love Dix too. Spent so much money on Dix. How many Dix? Spent all my time in Dix. You love Dix. I love it so much. I love Dix too.

Spent so much money on Dix. Dude, Dix is the best. Yeah. I mean, Dix, I love, I love when I go to a town there's just a bunch of Dix. Yeah. You know what I mean? I'll go to, I'll grab all the Dix.

I'll go, I'll go, I love Dix. Sometimes if, if one Dix is too busy, I'll just go to another Dix. Dude, sometimes I love, but you know what? I'll go to a a busy deck. I'll go to a non busy deck. You'll wait for the decks I'll wait for all the day. Yeah, my god. Yeah, fucking dick. Yeah, we love that. Oh No, no, no, no dick sporting good. I love a good deal on a hocus-Hoo. That's not what I was talking about. Oh, no. I'm gay. Wait a minute.

Fuck it, me too. Dude, could you imagine we just both came out, we did a gay podcast, and that was our thing. Not dammit, let's do it. I listen, dude. You wanna web, I wanna get to this, dude. You made memes, you make memes for everybody. Yeah.

So people will pay you to make memes. Yeah. I don't do it like that. I'm not like making them, but for advertisements, I'll have to do it. I made memes on Ellen. You did. Yeah. I didn't pay you.

Whatever fee they pay for people like the boxes, I'm shit. Yeah. It was like the normal day raider, whatever. Was she an asshole? I didn't meet her except for on the stage. Yeah. But what I, what I tell people like, I don't know if she's an asshole, but she's someone who's been through so much and her life is probably so unbearably annoying.

Mm-hmm. That I give her a little grace and whatever. Like she's running, she's the CEO, mastermind, kingpin head, whatever of what was a three four hundred million dollar company. Yeah. So people were crying about them saying hi to her in the hall and her not waving back. Like, get a fucking life, dude. Get grow up.

I hear. I actually heard she was meaner than that. I heard she played games with people. I'm sure she was fucked with people. I don't like that shit either. I don't like, I don't like, I don't like, what is it? Like, sadistic ego bullies. Yeah. I like, I don't like, I don't like, what is it? Like, sadistic ego bullies. Yeah.

I like, I don't like narcissists. Yeah. When I worked at Def Jam and Jay-Z was the president, it was known and told to you that you, if you go up to him and tell him you're a big fan of his music, that's your last day there. Why? Because that's the boss, dude. If you worked that Nabisco,

and we're walking down the hole, and so the CEO and you were like, dude, your crackers are the fucking best. Yeah, okay. Okay, great, fire that guy. Okay, I'm the head of, I'm the head of Nabisco, and I'm walking down the thing. Yeah, give me a compliment.

Yeah, hey, Mr. Nabisco, what's up buddy? I just wanted to let you know, when I was a child, my grandmother used to crumple up salty and crackers on chicken noodle soup. When I was sick, it just made me feel so loved. I just wanted to let you know that. I figured you'd appreciate that.

And then you go, I don't. I'm gonna do my part. Sorry. What are you fucking the director? A little narcissist, yeah. Sorry. I'm gonna give me the line again. No, just give me the line again.

Go from the top. I can't give you the line again. Just say you love my crackers. I love your crackers. It's a bit go. Mr. Nick Nabisco. I just wanted to let you know your crackers have had a tremendously positive impact on my life. Sun. Yeah. Sun. Yeah. That's why I make the crackers. Thank you so much. That's another way to you know what? Thank you so much. That makes that's why I do it. Thank you so much Where do you work? What department do you work in? I'm your assistant great. Yeah awesome Hang on one second fire this cuck's yeah, exactly You know, Stan me guy looks me in the eyes again. I'll fucking stab all you fuck

Hannah my box of crackers and get a fucking poor crack at dust down his throat and make him choke in the fucking in the employee locker room Exactly. I bet he take it. Yeah, I guess, look, you never know. I mean, everybody's bullshit, but. Yeah, some people are nice. Sometimes, sometimes people are nice sometimes and not other times. So you have no people working for you at all.

It's all you. So I have a guy that does my video that will pull clips from podcasts that I do or whatever, or, you know, will film stuff sometimes. So I don't edit video. My co-host on the podcast does all the research rights of the entire script, brings it to me. We sit down, record it.

She wanted those. One of what? You wanted those. One of what? You show up. For that particular project, yeah. You're a shower upper. But I made a board game that I was heavily involved in.

What? I made a board game that was in target. Influencers in the wild, the game. Ha, what the fuck? Wait a minute. Yeah. You were on Shark Tank? Yeah. Stop it. Yeah. Dude. Yeah. I have a Shark Tank idea. What is it? I want to watch this. Can I run it by you? Are you telling me if you mean you do it together? Yeah, of course. Because we're bald, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, let me watch the Razer. Oh, I got it. I can't, we gotta put the headphones in.

Is it a Razer? Ha, ha, ha. Yeah. All right, go ahead. Look at you. Look at you little tank walking down there. Influencers in the wild, the game. It's all about gaining followers on social media. So, I took the idea of influencers and internet culture

in general and built a board game around that. Go places, game followers, get famous, no talent required. It reimagines the classic board game, except in our game, you rack up followers instead of money. Players make their way around the board, one role of the diet of time, and just like in real life, the player with the most followers wins. How do you play it? So, do you pick an influencer playing piece? You put it on start, you roll the die, and I picked these influencer travel hotspots like Bali, Tulum, the desert rave. You ended the big pink

wall which is like the influencer mecca in Los Angeles, and you travel around the board. This is getting delisted. Why? Oh, no. All right. What the fuck, tag took a turn, right? What? What happened? What's the listed deal? So the game is in target and I went on the show two weeks after it got put in stores and the sales weren't gangbusters and those were the only numbers I had. I think I would have done better if the game was not even on the store on the shelves yet.

If they were part of the beginning. Yeah. Like if I was like, Hey, we're going into target. It's not on the shelves yet. Here's what they've ordered for the fall. Let's let's go. I mean, they were like, fuck you. They were all into it.

It was a fine segment, but they were all out. I didn't get a deal, but the segment was good. I'm happy with the segment. Is the game in the place in target? Yeah. Yeah. You making money? Uh, no, it's not going great.

And we're ending this podcast on a shit way. I mean, we started off at three million people. Well, here's the five million people. I didn't want you around me. I mean, I'm a negative influence. I'm working still to get it going. It's a product. Products are very different than,

how the fuck am I going to teach my product with you, though? You're a two, we don't go in. I'll be a two time loser. I don't want you, if I go on with you, they'll be like, is that definitely the game guy? I don't want to, what they call it? If he listed, he listed, yeah. What's that mean? Means target's not going to carry it anymore. What they called he listed he listed. Yeah. What's that mean means

target's not going to carry it anymore. Why? Because it's not selling or it wasn't selling when the when I went on Shark Tank. I shot that last September. And the game was only in stores for two weeks. I'll pitch my identity. You tell me. Sure. Let's do it. What is it? I'll be Mr. Wonderful. Hey, how you doing? I'm Robert Kelly. I like to vacation. I like to go away. I like pools in the summer. And I like to go in the ocean or lakes.

And I like floats. But the one problem is when you're on the float, on the side of the pool, all of a sudden you're on that side of the pool and people's way. Then you're over here out of the sun in the sun. In the ocean, you start out in front of your hotel, then you wind up down by the four seasons, not anymore. You don't stay at the four seasons. I stay at the four seasons, but go ahead.

I'm one of the people, not anymore, not anymore with my float anchor. It's called the flanker. With every float, you get a bag that you can put sand in or rocks and fill it up. And it comes with a rope that you can hook onto the handy little finger hook. So let me cut you off right here. Wait, I'm because I want because it's good. Okay. That's actually I'm because I want because that it's good. Okay. That's actually not a bad idea. I fucking know when you first told me about I was picturing an anchor going into the lining of the pool. No, but it's a bag filled with sand.

Bag. You feel it with anything. I mean, it's up to the waterproof bag. The bag gets where the flow goes in the bag. Wow. Throw the float up in the bag. The bag has a thing close on your finger. Then right then right we made we then when you go you don't have to buy a float when you go that you put your flanker in the bag. Travel opened up. Actually got a foot pump on it. It's just a little float you lie on it.

You hang your finger and you stay right. So the and the rope is is attached to the float. You told one piece. It's the bag. No, no, the bag is obviously it's all one piece. No, the bag. The float comes out of the bag. Now the bag has a rope with the finger rings. But is it all a torch attached like in a billiacl chord? No. The rope goes on your finger. So you can hold it. Just put it on your finger. Oh, no, I wanted to attach to the float. Now, no, why? Why? Because you might want to pull yourself over. You're a control. You you can still grab it if it's on the side. You put it on the float. Now, no, why? Why? Because you might want to pull yourself over.

You're a control. You, you can still grab it if it's on the side. You put on the side. Yeah, yeah. I guess you can put it on the side. Yeah. All right. You're in. Yeah. Let's do it. Let's do it. Great idea. Are you in? You know, people, I'm in. Let's do it. It's not a bad idea. We go back on, but you grow a mustache. We both have a mustache. They don't recognize you. They're going to think we're cops. So what? Well, cares, that's great. We're going to go in. Listen, I work in the 42nd. My buddy here is over. He's retired, but listen to his idea, I retired because they're hiring a lot of blacks. Yeah. What? I can't say

that. Yeah. There's a they hire more minority women now. So you can't say that. Yeah. There's a big higher, more minority women now. So you can't do those dick jokes. We like doing that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We love dicks. Yeah. Listen, dude. We're in. We got this. It's a great idea. It's a great idea. Are you going to help me get three million people? Yeah. Really? I'm going to do my best. I mean, I'm a, why does that get me excited? I just started doing this thing where I take pictures with bald white guys. Yeah, I Think you'd be a good candidate for you think. Oh, yeah, 100% I would be for sure. All right. I got questions for you Okay, you ready for the fan questions. I am First of all, where do people go to find you? Thanks an attra

Thanks good news influencers in the wild, and then psychopedia podcasts and target. Go to target. Please buy the game. I'm gonna buy the game. I'm gonna buy everybody a game. Great. In the studio. All the fans. No, here in the studio, the three autistic kids are gonna get the game. I'm gonna buy one game. They'll share it on weekends. Like a step kid. J. What is up muscle Bobby curious. That's all. Yeah, fun. Feel funky.

Dude, come on. What's up? Good. It's not bad. Dude, you look good. Come on. That's not bad. Keep it up.

Keep make this skinny last a long time. Thank you, buddy. Both of us. Yeah. It's just going on a shark tank. I got to put my pants curious how you would suggest someone who is sober to a use exercise and fitness as a replacement addiction. Love you on the Ryan Long skit. Oh, um, it's, it's a great

supplemental replacement. Yeah. Meaning if you base your entire sobriety on that, you're probably going to go off the deep end. Yeah. You might drink. You might fucking be real tight. You might be angry. If you can't get to the gym, you wind up kicking your dog or something. So it's a good add-on. But recovery is foundation of my life. Then music, comedy, family, fitness, reading, all that other stuff is like external. Yeah, no, I always say that to recovery. I'm recovering first. Yeah. Because if I don't put that first, my wife knows she's not the most important thing that's ever happened in my life. And she's fine with it. Right. first. Yeah. Because if I don't put that first, my wife knows she's not the most important thing that's ever happened in my life.

And she's fine with it. Right, recovery. Yeah. Recovery first. Yeah. And I also think, you know, because part of recovery, you got to replace the negative bricks. Yeah.

But you can't leave that void. No. Or you have a shit foundation. Yeah. You got to replace it with a positive brick and working out, you know, especially this time now, working out for me, even if it's as soon as I start to feel depressed or paranoid, yeah, I'll go work out for 20 minutes, just a 20 minute, whatever.

Yeah. And it's gone. Working out can be the rebar in the concrete, but you need the concrete. Yeah. So I mean, but that's only if you have a problem. The brick foundation thing that I said, which I think was the mortar. We tried to make mortar without sand. Well, you need the brick or you go back to the brick. Yeah, yeah, replace the, you can't leave a negative brick or the, I mean, the concrete works.

All right. Next one, right? A big Ben cox 69. What's the first meme you made? First meme I ever made was, it was actually it's one of my best, I think. It was, it's so stupid. The thing about memes is when you explain them in real life, they just sound so dumb. So maybe I can send you a picture of it and you can post it or you want me to explain it to you. Explain it. You want to, you want to. You want to talk to us. Yeah, I do. So it was a picture of two gophers. One gopher was in the foreground like this. And the main one, I'm sorry, in the background,

the main one was in the front. And I said something like, when you go ask your mom if your friend can sleep over, but you bring your friend so she can't say no, or something like, when you go ask your mom if your friend can sleep over, but you bring your friend so she can't say no or something like that. Right. Because I used to do that to my mom. Right.

If I wanted the friend to sleep over, I'd go, just come with me. Right. We're not gonna say no if you're there. If you're there. If I didn't want them to sleep over, I'd be like, hold on a second, let me just go ask my mom.

Yeah, she said no, sorry dude. Ha ha, that's gotta go. Those people that want us the over and you wouldn't let up. Yeah. I have a little fucking, that's a shit thing. That guy's probably an addict right now, not recovering. I'm a fucking addict dude, I'm the one who got fucked up. Ha ha.

Why are you sure to treat your friends better? You're right, my go for friends. We got another thing, rage against the creatine. Do you ever hire people to make memes for you? Do you have a screening process to make sure they're original? That's a good question. That is a good question.

I have toyed with the idea of hiring somebody, but I just like the creation is the best part for me. Right. That's the most fun. And then I put it out and it does how it does, but I really like the creative process, but if I got to the point where I could, or I had to do that,

and I had so much money coming in that I couldn't handle the creative process anymore, I would consider it, but that's not the model I'm going for. But feel free to DM me and send me memes, and if I post them, I'll credit you in the caption. That's it. Yeah. What would be a meme with me and you?

I like Bald guy memes, man. I did something with Dominic Lombardos. You know who that is? Love him. Yeah. It was very famous meme of two dinosaurs fighting. Yeah. But they had no feathers or whatever.

Okay. And the thing was like why don't bald guys do this when they fight? And they were like this. Yeah. And we went in his backyard and like did this and we also made a sketch. How popular was it? It didn't do that great. That's like, I was thinking of a good word for us. I mean, I can't guarantee anything.

Your honesty is fucking awesome. I mean, I was gonna jack, but like, all right, here's another one. Ready? Lizzo fat shame me for 20. Sorry to hear that. Has anyone ever told you your name sounds like Frank Zadazra? No, first time hearing that. What a cock, Saka. You got to love it. You got to love these two. That's good. Yeah. Lizzo Fetch. I'm sorry to hear about the Lizzo thing, man. We have crazy, right? You know what I realized? And I'd like to put this on the record. Yeah, but she's a piece of shit. No, it's that on a long enough timeline, everyone sucks eventually. man, I'm way too lazy, right? You know what I realized? And I'd like to put this on the record. No, it's that on a long enough timeline, everyone sucks eventually. Yeah, dude, they just take everybody down. You've never sucked? I've sucked. Sucked what? In life, just been fucking shitty.

Dude, I suck all the time. Yeah, I suck all the time. That's the problem. That's why I love stand-up comedians, though. Yeah, because we suck, we fail, and we'll go tell you about it. Yeah. You know what I mean? I got almost fucking murdered on the subway. It was just a pussy, and it's like, all right, I'm going on stage. Yeah. Just telling the world what happened.

Yeah. It's not a good story for me. Yeah. I look like an asshole in it. Yeah. I mean, a complete asshole. Did they like it? Yeah.

Yeah. It's one of my new favorite bits. Yeah. Yeah. It's crazy. But here's the problem. I actually told it on the bonfire because it just happened before that. People were like, he's lying.

Yeah. I was like, what? Yeah. I was like, do you really think? Oh, people think, people get paranoid. And they think I would lie about a story. It's like weird to me. It's like, dude, I'm a stand up.

Yeah. You know, and I'm a, you know, not to tube like, dude, I'm a stand up. Yeah. You know, and I'm, you know, not to tube my own home, I'm a pretty well respected one. Yeah. I don't really lie, I'll exaggerate. Yeah, yeah. Shit, but if I say something happened, I don't lie about it. Yeah.

I'm like, wow, they'll get you anyway they can. Oh, whatever, they love, you know what, bro, I realize, who was I talking about recently? Somebody, oh, Jamie Foxx. You see what happened with him? Hey, he's dead. No, he was not the real Jamie Foxx. He was sick. It's not the real one. Oh, you, you think a clone them 100% look at his earlobes. Okay, different earlobe. I'll check out his earlobes. That's a different earlobe. Oh, that's Biden. I'm sorry, I love Jamie Fox. Still love him. He's gone.

Okay. Well, yeah, I mean, dude, allegedly. No, so he posted something that said something about they killed Jesus. What do you think they're going to do to you? Yeah, right? Like basically they killed him. They killed him. They killed him for that.

I swear to God, no, so he's white now. Yeah, the new Jamie Foxx is as white as you. I mean, look at it, bring it up. Bring up the thing, I've seen it. All right, you know, you know, dude. So, but imagine the person who started that whole thing because they were like, this is anti-Semitic, you're talking about Jews.

And it's like, no, he's not. But imagine you got Jamie Foxx to take down one of his posts. That would feel like something for you. If you were a nothing person, and you'd never done anything in your life. Dude, the power they have, I mean, that's like, so that person saying to you, you made it up. Sorry about this, look at him.

That's lighting, dude. Really? Yeah. All right, do the side by side. Well, you can show me side by side with... Why that why is it? Why is this go T fucked up? It was just in the hospital yet a fucking mask on probably for look how dark he is Yeah, I look different in different pictures too different lighting. Don't they have a side by side? All right, the one underneath go to the one right underneath right there. Click on that. Well, that's not that's not him

He looks so different dude. That's John. John Boega. But that's him. Look how different he looks. I mean, he looks like he looked, he used to look like Jamie Foxx. Now he looks like the kid in Star Wars. I mean, it's crazy. Well, it's next. Keith Robertson. Yeah. No, I mean, it's weird. I mean, they, I mean, he looks, I mean, it's weird. I mean, it looks like he's getting crazier. Yeah, you got to face that, too. It's not to do what they can do to you. And who are they? That's the thing.

It's like, who are they? Instagram. Yeah, but who are they? It's Instagram. Have you met them? I met Instagram, yeah. You've met them? I didn't look like it was.

Women's? No, it was like a bunch of electrical impulses floating in the middle of a room What it was fucking weird. What are you talking about? I didn't mention that no What are you talking about when I went to Instagram? What do you want to meet Instagram? What the fuck are you talking about? Tank and I went there and they were a cube a what a cube And there was a cube, a what? A cube in the middle of this giant room. And then just being busy, he was just you. And I saw one of my memes in the algorithm and they put it down. It went in. It got shot down. What did someone, it sucked it in? The algorithm said,

fuck this. And it pushed my meme down to the bottom of the cube. Did you see any of my stuff? It was all littered at the bottom of the cube. I'm all in the bottom. Yeah. Unfortunately. I tried to levitate it up with my mind, but I didn't. How can I get in there? Did you really meet people in the fucking Instagram? Oh yeah. Oh you have? Oh yeah, but there was no algorithm.

Do you know people in Instagram? Yeah. You do. Yeah. And they know you. It's great once you know people. Because like when I first got tanks and not so verified, it took me like a year, right? To get it verified before you could buy it. When I launched tanks, good news.

I went to Instagram, they were like, we just want to, you know, talk to you about this page and doing so well. We're so glad you're giving an outlet for positivity or whatever. So they pull it up. They're like, how many followers do you have now? And at that point, I had like 300,000 or whatever it was. And the girl Ashley that I met, she's like, it's not verified yet.

And I was like, no, I didn't even submit it for anything. It's not anywhere or whatever. But I got it in a cab. By the time I got back to my office, it was verified. Fuck you. They just flipped the switch. Yeah, dude, I went to Twitter in San Francisco when nobody knew what Twitter was.

Yeah. And this fan of OBE and Anthony was like, you know, I was doing the punchline. Yeah. He want to come down. I just, I told my wife, I'm going, I'm going to go to this Twitter thing. She's like, what?

When was this? Years ago. Yeah. When it first, Twitter first came out. It was 2011, whatever. Murdering my space. Yeah. And I went in.

I went in. You met. I brought me upstairs. Yeah. And I went in. I was sitting down in the cafeteria at San Francisco, Twitter. Yeah, it's crazy. And the founders came over and was talking to the guy I was with Jack.

No, yeah, Jack came over. Yeah, yeah. And it's other guy. And there was a, I was sitting there and they were talking to him and they were like, all right, bye, take these nice to meet you. They're like, oh, he's a comic. Oh, thanks, thanks. Yeah, yeah.

And he's like, those are the founders. I'm like, what? Yeah. I go, and I went in the back. I go verify me. He goes, all right, well, that's not, thanks. Thanks. Yeah. Yeah. And he's like, those are the founders. I'm like, what? Yeah, I go and I went in the back I go verify me. He goes, all right. Well, that's not I'll talk to the department. Yeah, and he did I was verified before anybody Wow, really for Norton and I remember going back to opian Anthony and Norton and go and do a Twitter and they're like, fuck what what are you gonna say in 140 characters? What is that for? Yeah same guys were like, what need an iPad? Yeah. It's just a big iPhone. Yeah. Why do you need an iPhone? Use your blackberry. I mean, I hate people always say... Dinosaurs.

Fuck you. Why do you need that? And then they use it. And you're like, fuck. You know? Yeah. Yeah. I remember when they first got Twitter and they got into Twitter competition followers. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They were like, I got this many.

You got that many and you saw them just get into that. Yeah. Yeah. Look, I got this many. You got that many. And you saw them just get into that. Yeah. That how many do you got? Like people ask that question a lot. Yeah. So how many do you got? Yeah. Means a lot to a company. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I'm telling you, do before people were getting into the 200, 500 million comics were. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I had a respectable numbers. You could say like 60,000. That was a lot. Yeah, yeah. You know, I had a respectable numbers. You could say like 60,000, that was a lot. Oh yeah. And, you know, companies would be like,

yeah, what the fuck in send your shit? You'll be out of the fucking ghost me. But you'll be able to tour for the rest of your life based on your following and your fan ship. I'll be able to make a living. I remember when Neil Brennan first started on Instagram and he didn't, maybe he didn't first start. He had like 40,000 followers or whatever it was and he was posting

About a theater tour he was doing and they were all sold out Yeah, I was like how the fuck is he selling out theaters with 40,000 followers Dave Chappelle No, I yeah But I mean I couldn't do a theater tour. Yeah, I mean, yeah, well, I mean look theater tours I just I couldn't do a theater tour. Yeah, I mean, my theater. Yeah, well, I mean, look, theater tours, I just, I couldn't do a comedy club tour. It's funny, guys like that really stay up and go, which is great. I've gone up, I've done theater tours,

I've come back down to clubs, I've gone back up to theaters, I've come back down to clubs. It's a weird, you know, it is a weird, as long as you stay up, but as long as you're doing what the fuck you like doing, and you can make money at it, is the best thing.

That's your living, that's your profession. Yeah, everything else is relative. Yeah. You get $20 gazillion, you sleep at a bed, the same size bed I sleep in. Yeah. Rain doesn't get on on you, we can both get snacks and take a shit and stock.

Snacks, yeah. You know what I mean? So whatever. Make sure you check, get snacks and take a shit and snacks. Yeah. You know what I mean? So whatever. Make sure you check it. Make sure you check him out. Thanks, Anatra. He's got three Instagram accounts that are unbelievable and he's got a game in God damn

target. Yeah. Is it only a target? It's in your order. In your order of Amazon. It's on Amazon now. Yep. Listen, if you want the game, how much is it? 20 bucks.

You want the game, hit me up and the first fucking 10 people I'll buy the game. Me too. I'll buy the game for you. First 10 people that hit us up, you'll get games. So you'll buy 10. I'll buy 10. Yep. Buy the game for you, but you have to post about it and say that you got the game and you got to pay for it and I'll buy all you all you nerd

You want a game? Yeah, I want the game. They just wants to free shit. That's all okay. You want some chicken feed? Yeah Yeah, fuck up Put the chicken head on the other day. Yeah, yeah, thank you. We'll have it What you want you guys want a piece of ham? Yeah. Not ham. Give me some ham. I'll buy you a ham. Dude, I'm glad you finally came on. You got me to come back on again, dude. Thanks for having me. All right. I want to come on your show.

Yeah. It'll be a good time. I'd love to come. It's a fun time. I mean, you there's nothing about true crime in itself. That's funny. Yeah. But we make it funny. We have a good time I love crew truck. I'm laughing. I'm still right now. I go to robakelylive.com To see me live at Rutherford, New Jersey, Las Vegas, Skankfest, Rochester, Skankfest, Madison was going no why I wasn't invited Fuck Kansas City East Providence asbury Park. I got a lot of dates coming up. Of course, check me out four days a week on serious XM, faction talk, the bonfire with

the great big J.O.G. person. Yes. And check out my other podcast, the regs. You can get the YKWD merch, the regs merch. All of it is up on comicwearables.com. Use code word ladybugget20% off everything on there. And also make sure you check out the, the three guys that, how many do this? At Mike V. Suarez, we work with me in a bunch of places. Check out where he's going to be at on at Mike V. Suarez. Everything. What do you guys got? Go.

Max Marcus comedy, all social media at Danny Braff on Instagram and the cheese show on YouTube. New sketch posted today. There you go. And check out the regs podcast once a month. That's a gas digital YKWD exclusive and also a bone to pick podcast at bone to pick podcast.com. It's all over the place. I'm all over the place. Thanks for supporting all the shows they do. Thanks for checking out everything coming to my live shows. You guys are the best fans in the world. Thanks for coming on, brother. Let's go smoke a cigar. Yeah. Yeah. Let's do it. I'm right. We'll see you guys next week on you know what the podcast.