Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - The New Studio

Episode Date: August 31, 2015

This week on YKWD: The gang's been hard at work putting the new studio together, and it's finally here! We are joined by Brian Scolaro, Wil Sylvince, Joe List, Dan Soder, and Noam Dworman! We get acclimated to the new digs, talk about our interactions with "ladies of the night", and discuss the recent developments in the presidential race. Watch (YouTube.com/ykwdpodcast) / Listen and enjoy!   RiotCast.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Ya son casi las dos, nos vamos a ir a casa o hemos venido a jugar. A casa, a casa, nadie va a irse a casa. Hay que ponerse modo de racón. ¿Eres un dragón? Soy el dragón de Fireball. Ya te digo yo que las mejores historias siempre piezan con un chupito de Fireball. Bien, frío. Yo, pues al lío.

Un Fireball, sabes que la fiesta será épica. Ignite the night, Network Riotcast.com What's up, Rioters? Don't call them that John. What do you mean Michelle? We are now on the Riotcast Network and we need to be more like angry and mob like. Yeah, but it sounds like we're about to burn down a liquor store or something and I'm just not comfortable with that.

Exactly. This is what these Riot people do Michelle. They like build pickets, they hit the streets and they're just mad. You know what we're going to do? We're going to do our show, the video game outsiders, right here on the Riotcast Network live every Tuesday at 9pm Eastern. Alright fine then also go to Riotcast.com and you can subscribe to the podcasters like a button there somewhere just push it.

We talk about video games. Sometimes maybe. But it's mostly just a bunch of crap. And Michelle there's also an underdute on the show. Hey guys I'm Brad. Anyway video game outsiders live on Riotcast 2 days ago. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. it. This podcast has no rules. Can I get a microphone? I'm sure I've already said to the record. It's rubber killing. You know what, dude? You know what, dude?

I know what, dude! I cast unbreakable cast documents. I cast unbreakable cast documents. I'm trying to cut my mind. It's... All right, and let's try this one more time. One more time. We're back. Hello, everybody. Hey, Joe, wake up.

Joe, wake up. Are you sleeping? Dude, this new studio is so awesome. Thank you, Dan. Thank you. This is so cool. I can't find, I really like this studio. You do? Yes, I love it.

It's nice, right? It's nice, very nice. How's that like in the studio? I can't say it. I'm starting saying table. It's a new table. It's a new table. It's not a new table. It's new. They built all custom custom. They did all the

Where you say custom custom custom what custom? That's a custom Bench couch bench couch. Oh wow, and you know what new we have a Nusprasil machine for coffee and I always remember all the these curtain all the window Everything's blacked out. Yeah, this table. Oh, oh, I show you this Did you see this little little tidbit? There's a bargain open. We're all gonna let you see a drop door that we can Look at that. I can look at that. That's what you got so excited about that's a light up bar I really don't like CEO Bobby's chair. That's what this feels like Bar really don't like CEO Bobby's chair. That's what this feels like

As somebody as somebody host who hosts a show on a real who has a real radio called the bonfire on serious XM Moniz and one six day. I expect you to respect this chair. This feels like I'm interviewing you're not in you are interviewing I'm interviewing I'm interviewing all of you That's the new show you look like you picked up the shittiest criminals around the world Some shitty action film like he's the computer scientist Well, I look like you run children soldiers I could then he looks like I thought I wouldn't know he actually get the cars Yeah, Brian is the real man. I get a van. I'm real fast I mean the first guy killed him the first mission You're the one that shoots the teller in the head. No, you're the one that you're the one that quits because you can't handle that anymore

Hey, all right later on you cut you're the one who saves us all at the end with some I fucking van plane Scopus or nephew that you have to bring in on the gig He's the guy who fucking turns us. Yeah, he a, he's a supposed to be a superstar in the business. He goes to the Russians, goes with them, tries to get those, all of us killed. Like, that's when he is, baby. Will dies. Will gets killed in the world.

I'm gonna shut that. I'm gonna shut that. I always die. You know what, I'm gonna, I'm gonna do a rewrite. Ha ha ha. Doesn't die, doesn't die, but does get incarcerated. I'm sorry. Hold on, can I get the bed of old please please okay, how about you are you're like I'm not in the half the movie. I love yeah

Well, you shot the teller in the head and the anhypatic. Yeah, isn't the black. I always the demo the demolitions guy You're explosive. There you go. Thank you. Is that better? You're explosive who's exposed you? Yeah, but you you you actually are getting all our guns in ammo ready and And stupid scopal who turn turn coat with the Russians they blow you up you die you have to die actually I don't die we know we need you to die. I'm the one that's just doing this to get my daughter back I'm the most likable bad guy Val Kilmer and a sequel you actually dating a daughter You know what? Probably be a straight to video and I won't start And the sequel you actually dating a daughter You know what?

You know what? Why would you why would you add that why would you add that you got pedophile face? What is that mean? Best you got no is that the best you got you look like you're in a third world poker game What? To the band there. I'll be the first one First one with the bomb down. It a bomb down it's the bomb down it's not a hangi chief stop with your hangi chief right this is 1922 you

know I fucking uh Clyde von Verneric I like it on my back right back Clyde von Verneric was good. I don't even know what that means. Too many von vans. Way too many. Do I kill Natalie Holloway? How do you know that? Mm-hmm. Well, it's not the truth to Joe.

Oh. So I like that. But you just- I like that. I like that. I like that. That's new- that's Will's new thing is to believe every joke. Exactly.

Is that based on a factual evidence? Well, that would just fucking got super quiet and awkward. Yeah, you can. I like the talk. This and the stills make us unfunny, man. Thank you. It is like, well, shway different. Yeah, it feels like we're all by being

like brought in, like we're in trouble. Yes, thank you. Then we can't see you. I'm just so calling you the dean. Listen, Jerry Spears, some of us were unfunny before the studio. He still got it. Not gonna the studio He's still got it. I'm not gonna name names I can't remember Chris's name

Can't remember Chris's them It's multi-leveled What is his fucking fake his pop it level laughing like you just announced your plan fake his puppet laugh your laughing like you just announced your plan Joe's on fire today while listen man, I I'm sorry that the studio is not Up to your par I guess. What are you talking to all of you? I like it. I Go around the room. I want I want to know what you think of the studio

My be for the studio. Well first. I have trouble with change. How long can we, anybody, do some cells? Yeah, I do that, and then we're gonna go around the room. And you know how I do the show. And every time you're on the show, you try to do some weird fucking power play at the beginning. All right, stop it. Take those glasses off too. I'm sick of looking at me.

Take them off. Take them off on the show. I don't like daytime will. I don't, I'm also sick of looking at you though. So, all right. All right, everybody. Here's my beat. May I introduce the truth, AKA Joe List.

My beat is I got here at 242. Yep, yeah. And we started recording at 329. That's 50 minutes. And here's the reason why. Oh, he's not here. The Anzota was a little late today. It was never late. Never. Never late. Dan Soda was a little late today. It was never late.

Never. Never late. Never. He's never been late really. Ever. Okay, he called up, he says, and he said, I might need a little time. He tried, he got down here as fast as he could.

I wanted you guys all to come in together. So I made you wait down, I made you wait down, see, as a relaxing restaurant. I apologize. I'm not an Iphone restaurant, I'm not a Iphone restaurant. It wasn't in a field in the sun with fucking mosquitoes. Well, I was in the dark. that she is a relaxing restaurant i apologize i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am i am were late if Bobby hadn't instilled this policy of everyone comes in together. So I don't want you to apologize. No, no, no, no, no, no, I appreciate it. But it's not your apology to give. It's Mr. Robert Patrick Kelly's. Hey, one second. First of all, a policy means it's going to happen every week. Okay. That's my middle name. Bobby P Kelly, Bobby P K, RPK. I had a Valor Vena sweater when I was a kid with RPK on the grass.

I remember from your bit about the guy tossing you your car keys. Is he thought you were Mexican? Yeah. Go ahead, Patrick. That's the, that's the reaction I used to get. Hey listen, first of all it's not a policy because it's not happening again. All right, it happened today because of special circumstances.

Today, special circumstances, every day you've come on the show, Joe, I've been up here ready to go. Yes. And we start, okay, over. One time you were late. But over hundreds of episodes. Hundreds of episodes. Hundreds of episodes.

Yes. One time we're introducing a new studio. I want you to be one of the people in the room to be on that show Mm-hmm, and I want to Dan too. Yeah, I want to Brian Hearing a lot of words was unavailable so we got well words, but listen Oh, you want an apology? That's correct. You want a apology from me. Oh, I want to see if this is gonna happen I was in there for 50 minutes. I could have done every joke I've ever written. Just say sorry stupid. I was gonna say, you're not stupid.

I'm not associated with him. I don't know if he's a American. I was just making a saying. It was a Haitian American. Oh. He's not the same. He's not the American. He's Haitian.

He's not from this country. He's not a green card. I was over a kidding. Can we take that part out? Because I got some network TV coming up and I don't want anyone to take that sound clip and listen to it. Nobody would have done it now you and now you can't watch it. You're like the fucking news given the terrorist ideas. Next thing they know they're going to be using the play.

Oh that's a good bit. You should do that bit. Yeah, okay. But you want an apology or not. I would like one. Joe, what's your middle name? Albert. Joe, over this. Joe.

I bet Albert's his first name and he knew he could never make it in this business of the switch at list Albert list is a rent a card guy named after my great grandfather. He was a war hero. No, he wasn't he was a war person Too-too-black eyes Well They can have those two clips together. Well's shouting the N word downstairs in a restaurant. Oh, can I tell you something real quick? Fucking Keith Robinson. I'm driving in the car.

I'm in traffic in New York City. And he starts like, we're talking NWA. Hold on, you driving in the car? Yeah, sometimes you're talking NWA. Sometimes you can be parked in the car. So I'm in the car driving. Is that better? So we're talking NWA and RAP.

And he starts, you know,WA wrap and he starts you know talking about he's not saying the N word loud. My windows are down and I'm like yo yo dude you're on Bluetooth you're on my speaker man shut and he's he's not saying it again. So Keith wasn't in the car. No he's on Bluetooth and I'm at a fucking light in traffic in New York with a lot of wheels around Haitian-american like that, you know a little lighter than will. I don't like just let out I was like, dude shot the fuck up man. Yeah, I was talking to them. Did you see the movie NBC? Hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on. That's the ending of that story

Did you see the movie? Hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on. That's the ending of that story. Now that he was, Keith was yelling a lot of shit to get Robin Trump. Yeah, he was yelling the, that's it. Nothing will happen. How would you rewrite that story?

I would not say it. That's all I had. You just wouldn't let it happen. You're gonna show, well, that's why you had to say it for that story. Now, you didn't get beat up. Someone didn't come in there and yank you up. Was it?

Yank me up. I don't know how to get yanked up. How do you get yank somebody up? Some right by a collar. I don't have a collar on a t-shirt. I know how you get yanked up You only root for your team in October Thank you, thank you. Wow. Wow. I'm not saying sorry either fucking Albert Real Albert Joe It sounds like an assassinated guy. Joe Albert list without the list. I love that.

It really does. President or shooter. When you have three names, you do an event. The suspect Joseph Albert list was seen with a book to positive. I'm gonna say my middle name once we get one to pass on. Whoa, what was that? You want to get that whole sentence out for your stumble all over

Or a flat face white guy? I'm so awkward. This is all I feel awkward. Why I feel like everybody's fighting. We are it's them I want to hear the NWA it's him. Who am I fighting? What are you talking about? Joe list and the storm Listen, no, not another segue and then you interrupted he went off and said then we started talking about NWA Well, we'll talk about NWA and I was talk. I really liked NWA. He never Keith don't like NWA He's don't like it. No, he was it was I can't buy you stand you guys. I shouldn't just had all new guys all that have never been on the show

And you know what they would have came in here and whoa Now what you get with came in here and whoa Now what you get with it blinks No, this is seasoned dead in the eyes About it is I help make it yeah, I have a feeling that Joe Brad is step that energy that you'll Rutgers on the matter or what? Still going still We have the Rutgers emblem on the table say what you will about Joseph Albert list. So you like NWA I love NWA Dan corporate Dan aka monster voice Serious XM channel 95

Listen all the people listen to your show from my show are there. You're not getting any more. You're right. I'm saying. I'm not even nature moving. I love not even nature. Not because I hate you. You know, he was talking about it. Uh, he said he doesn't. He never liked it. They were too, too rough to mean to do. No, no, no, no. First of all, first of all, in the movie that they portrayed them as having an attitude, not gangster. If you look at Ice Cube, Ice Cube, when that guy came on the bus, he stayed quiet and kept in his notebook.

I saw Ice Cube as Dr. Dre had an after, he always had an anger problem. I'm sorry, what did you say? I didn't know. How far was that? I understood. When you started talking, when you came in the room, when I said the will of it, what have you said since then? Ice Cube.

Because King is talking about the next day. Well, still big day. Hey, hey, the Mushmouth. Hey, hey, the Haitian terror. Who saw a... Who saw a... A.K.I. shop and a fucking army name. You see a star counter?

No, but I drove through during the daytime one time. I said I could open a KFC on Crunchyaw. How fun. Because I was so hungover. C.O.M.P.T.O.N. I said you'll open a KFC on Crunchyaw. How fun. Because I was so hungover. COMPT O-Win. I jerked off to a national geographic. Okay. We're on par.

Um, we're on par. Can we start again? No, we're not starting again. That's what I'm talking about. I did see it was diary of a teenage girl and it is phenomenal. Yeah, yeah, sisterhood. Is that one of the best people in the world?

Is that one of the best people in the world? There's a couple of black people. They do a lot of big black dick. I have you watching like movies Why are you always killing me on this? What do you mean black movie boys in the hood is one of my favorite movies? But it's a side way back then Yeah, when two-pock got shot the first time Two-pock didn't get shot net. He wasn't it way back then and now two-pock ever was a 92 What do you try to say that you don't like?

Classic you see life you see life with Eddie Murphy and Martin Lawrence. That's right That's a good I don't understand why I got to see good movies some of them are made by black people and some of my people You name you up black movie this time that you see this time. Yeah, come on Joe. What does this time mean? You know what you know on me come on Recently. Yes, I saw the Butler See the Butler I saw the Butler oh my god The land lord right here in this chair. That's gonna be right here. That's your wrestling name the landlord The rents do when the landlord comes in the room

when a landlord comes in the room. There's too much space above your head. He's blocking the camera. There's too much space inside of it too. There's too much space above your head. The camera should be. Yeah, no, I know, we're working it out. Woo! You should come down a little bit.

I'm not a little bit. It's the landlord. The landlord, he's coming for rent. Rents too. The man, the landlord, the owner, the creative person, himself, my neighbor, my friend, one of the best people. Dorm and the owner of everything, can we call you the head?

No, I like that. Yes, we have a mill. Well, what's that? Yeah, but, ah. That's good. That's good. Do you have a mill name? No, I don't.

You don't have a mill name? I tell you guys something, just, Robert came over to my house yesterday, and guessed it, Kelly. Robert, you guessed it, Kelly. To, uh, with his son. New swimming pool. He's got a beautiful swimming pool. Robert, did you jump right into the pool?

Two ships, two floors up. If I had a video of Robert jumping into the pool, you would think it was CGI. It was, I mean, the waves, the people spinning around, it was awesome. Like, it was in a, like, We were talking about it after you left. You're talking about old cannonball killing? I mean, it was like, and I mean, it was really, I'll remember it. I'll remember it.

There's a lot of water displacements. No, but you had to see it. And it actually made me jealous. It was like alpha dive in pool. I think it made me like jealous like like it was like alpha Dive in pool like I think it made me less attractive to my wife I see it to God you had one of those big dick jump in the pool. He's got heat. Let me tell you somebody first Like a meteor The best is no What I love it is like it's the longest way to end the insult. He's like, no, it's building it up.

It was almost impressive. The water cascaded into the sky. You guys are always looking for punchlines. That's your problem. I was just telling you what I thought. Anyway, go ahead, go ahead, go ahead, good start. The, first of all, his house, you know, he has this beautiful house.

And the backyard is immense. It's like levels and levels you go where it's like owning acreage and you know really like a far more sick uh... farmland but really great you know uh... usage of it and then he adds this pool to it oh my god did that he had heated perfectly i mean you go to anthony kumi is pulled so i jump in the fucking uh... boiling macaroni water some nights, you know what I mean?

You feel like it's just like a jacuzzi. He has a soul. He has it at the perfect, you know when you jump in a pool and you wait and you're like, it's, you jump in and you just come up. And you're like, this is it. It's like the exact perfect.

And the color, the color, I don't have to. I don't have to. All right. Perfect and the color of the color of the pool. I got to say two matters to me. Some people get it like a dark Pulled no offense a dark pool and it's it's just too kind of depressing and scary. Some people get too blue And it's like this is kind of ghetto again no offense and it's just But get too blue and it's like this is kind of ghetto again. No offense. And it's just To I don't know to how weird and goofy. He's you got this beautiful gray blue. I picked the color It's what's the color in say beautiful gray blue? We fought my wife and I fights about it But why did she want it live? She's Puerto Rican. She wanted multi-color

Giant Puerto Rican flag on the bottom of it. Can we just paint it on the bottom of the pool? I want to I want to love ground. I actually joke to the back she got mad. I just told you this maybe already but I told joke to the pool guy. I said listen, it's a surprise, but you think you could put in a fire hydrant as well as well. My wife's family comes over. Ah, more.

Fucking hilarious. She didn't like it. Yeah, that pool okay, but that fire hydrants the shit It's it's I went over the yesterday and there was a Ray Ellen and Dan Natteman. Oh, I did you have to well? I'm sorry What are you shandy friends somebody's trying to get in the rubat tickets?

You're free shamby a friend is like yes? I am funny guys came over, but please don't tell anybody you came over Wait you laughing, but when when right when you came over right all of a sudden he goes did Robert Noir was here Like what he says that Robert Noir was here like he was afraid like he was warning if you would have wanted to come over If you had known he was there of course, I don't care I don't mind that if it was real famous people I probably wouldn't come over railing a Dan Adam and wanted to come over if you had known he was there. Of course, I don't care. I don't mind that. If it was real famous people, I'd probably wouldn't have come over. Rail and a Dan Nattyman, I'll come over. Unbelievable.

Had a great time. His kids, my kid, swimming, my kid fell, hit his face, I think the pool. Ooh, those are pretty. How did he react to it? He, let me tell you something. When you kid, you'll know someday. When you have a kid, you're not gonna have kids. But when you have kids, Dan, and you're kids that you have that you don't met yet will and Brian you'll

have kids maybe someday. I want to hear you start I want to hear where you go. It's the worst thing in the world the first time he's every time he gets hurt his kind of the first time, you know, he fell and hit his face for the first time yesterday on his pool. And he's bleeding and you're like, fuck, you can't prevent it. There's nothing you can do, but it just sucks. How did he react? He cried, I mean, his pool, the edge is stone.

It's pretty sharp. And he had his chin on it which sucks in your chin what's that like huh that's a joke about me not having a chin yeah I know I got it we got do you have the ht's get's go I already have it but it actually did get a laugh I mean right I mean you have two kids so you already was a personal Roberts kid has had a really tough time he's had whooping coffee had struck Brody had his thing in his eye. Where was whooping coffee? He didn't have whooping coffee. He had some, yeah, he did.

It was Colin. It wasn't whooping coffee. No, you know, you're going west. You know that whooping coffee? He had some bet really bad. It was a different thing. Yeah, whooping coffee is very bad. What's whooping coffee?

That's, you know, I didn't whooping coffee. Whooping coffee is terrible. I had whooping coffee. What is whooping coffee? It's a cough that literally can kill kids because it takes your breath away and with me I got it don't got it while she was pregnant with Max he got actually he got he got he got yeah Max had something called flow he had a little cop but not whooping call I actually whooping call was so bad I was caught I was on the toilet

coughing and I passed out I woke up just banging my head on a hotel bathroom door And there was just blood all over the door Wait till my recently oh and that happened what no that happened recently a two years ago when Max was in Three and a half years ago when Max was in dawn's belly. I was in Chicago It's just a terrible terrible thing you should if you don't if you never got whooping cough go get your whooping cough shot uh... max got a whooping cough shot because of that terrible kids will die because they don't know how to catch their breath you know they mean they don't know how to what's collic

uh... it's going to be a hair close up what that's not how you get through a conversation is got a stop you and ask you would every word me that will solve it we don't have these in the hood collic whooping cough credit

I Like it will yeah, so it's it was he broke his leg He not fractured his shinbone tough kid which sucked three days into Camp at the Jason's horrible yeah, he was having a blast. I mean a blast don was having a blast and then three days in camp at the Jason's home. Yeah, he was having a blast. I mean, a blast. Don was having a blast and then three days in, I'm in San Diego with a Comic Con and I get that call. That's like, do I go home?

This is a Comic Con. I don't know what I mean. Can I tell you a story why I reacted that way about Dan and Ray Ellen. They were over at my house and my kids want to play hide and seek. And they were like, like I mean what I found out later was just an imitation but they but for a second you would think these were real

human beings like they were running and hiding and counting the 20 and finding me and like seem to enjoy it. Dan and Ray. Dan and Ray. So then I when he says okay time to take the kids inside for bath so I walked in just to take the kids inside. I think i walked in just to take the kids inside i think i was gone like literally 45 seconds i walk back out they're hovering over ray ellen's phone the most disgusting porn i have ever seen like literally 45 seconds ray is showing your kids porn ray showing dananerman porn oh like like instantly

point Ray showing Dan Natterman porn oh like like instantly they're playing hide and see and pretend and then instantly the foulest porn I've ever seen it within seconds of me going inside those are doing it without kids I mean it's disgusting what is bad what is what is disgusting porn make sure you wish me the whole time they were playing with oh why is it what's disgusting porn yeah I don't want but but but but means the whole time they were playing with my kids like can't Which these kids get out of here. So I could look at this fucking porn, but maybe that's not how it was Maybe they were playing with your kids and you made them think of the disgusting You are really setting these guys up to be arrested. It wasn't child porn. It was not Liz

Liz the manager of of everything here just texted me saying that will needs more light literally you can't see will yeah everyone that tried to say that this is not designed for us man I feel like I'm in a real bright spot here I mean can you eat your hat can you take your hat off some adjustments and have will back next week I just my wardrobe for the good job now can Can you sit over there? You're on to change let's change No, can you change seats with no so I will can you switch with no no roll switch? Just hold it. Just hold that hold that I

Yeah, he's on the same job. I was just kidding Let's switch yeah, no you don't switch dad Let's switch. Yeah, no, you don't switch dad. No That's all go story. That's great. That's great. Everyone's on me to switch You switch with him, please. I don't mind. Let's see that your way bright over here. Let's switch. Let's see if that works So from the next couple making note all black guess it over in the seat What if you have two? Yeah, you're not gonna have to see him. Let's see him. How's that? Well, that's way better, right? Can you sit down?

I want to have everything. Go right on to. Yeah, we're just going to make that light shoot right there. That's all. Yeah, you should get some pin spots. That's not you have. I don't know what that is. What's the pit?

I got to do over there. I just said again. No, no, you're fine. You just do your thing. So everyone walks in today and Joe's bitching about the studio. I didn't bitch with the studio. I bitch said it's too close. We're too close. I got here 15 minutes ago. He bitch about the time. But he said he's too close. I'm not bitching. It just feels like there's no place to hide. We get arm wrestle from here. I feel like we can have a we can make out.

What does that mean? This is a beautiful layout. Actually, it's different from this point of view. It's nice. Now you like it. Now you love it. Will was bitching. I was, no, I had no, no. I was bitching because you held us in freaking custody. Customs downstairs. In custody. 30 minutes. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

It's a nice studio. Custom. Custom. You held us down. It's a nice studio. You made a thing to declare. But you made a collet. You made G. Niggas go to me robotics

and all those gadgets. I said there's gonna be robotics. You this gadgets. I said there's gonna be robotics. You said there's gonna be some. Gadgets. Gadgets and gadgets. I said gadgets. Gadgets. I said gadgets.

I never said I just wanted you guys to be. It's a nice studio. All right, well thank you. We got a good feed table. You still got the same headphones. I like that he calls it graffiti. Like there's a gang up here. Well you know, new headphones, he's a great headphones. I'm just he calls it graffiti. Like there's a gang up here. Well, you know, new headphones.

These are great headphones. I'm just saying, you're gonna go out, go out. I'm not going out. I'm in the new studio. We have to go out again. We just, no, we're not going out. The man is waiting for me. I would have made the table the whole length.

Yes, what do you mean? I would have spread it out. We can still do it again. I would, I would spread it out just a little bit more. That's money right there, talk. We can do it again. You have to, I like that everybody's right next to each other. Okay, we can all do it again. I would I would spread it out just a little bit more that's money right there talking We'll do it again. You know I like everybody's right next to each other Okay, I'll see each other I agree with that, but he said we could do it again. I don't know you're right I think it's great everybody we're right here in the conversation if I spread it out

You kind of separated you when you're right next to somebody you feel the energy like you feel Joe shitty energy right Super friends table the long way with the justice. We had that. That's what we had before. No, I just mean I just meant a little bit like that that that instead of coming in where instead of peeking where Joe's sitting there kind of would go a little bit so the right and then and will would be

or some mobile. Yeah, like a little like a I think it's great because you're in the corner. You're on the I mean everybody's right on top of you. So it's hard to do in this space. We got everybody. Everybody's got this spot But you're absolutely right that look being close together makes a big difference to the conversation That's right absolutely like the comedy seller the comedy sell well That's a per I think that's one of the most perfect things ever and you should get that on video. You should have Dup Dupu do that Dupu we did it last week. Did you guys see that?

No. No, he didn't tell me about it. He said it was fantastic. Well, no, you should actually have him set up and do a camera thing like this is for your table now. It looks beautiful. Yeah. Beautiful.

Okay, I would love that. All right. Dr. Dupu, you got some more work. Let's talk about the table some more. All right, well listen. Here's the deal. You should have Tony on. Tony, the guy who did all this I know we should

Well, can you not say it like you're accusing me like I'm not having them on you're not thankful to Tony What's this? How is this all the way? You said you cock second as soon as the levels change He's got kids. I love Tony too. I love Tony more than you. I said What was that to me hug them yesterday? I hugged him last night and today all right But I might not more when I hugged him yesterday. I shut up. I've never heard neither Anyways, this is just I mean, you know, I don't even know what to say. I know. Did you see I'll show you the compin?

No, I haven't seen you. Do you like do you like gangster rap? No, I like some of some of the grooves. I'm not, you know, do you like, do you like NWA? What was the last black movie you liked? Um, she's got to have it. Oh, she's so long. That's gross. And Joe,

when was that Joe last one? He so was um, wasn't the hood. Yeah, is that the last black movie you saw? I was going to say gone with the win, but uh, Jesus. I saw I saw 12 years of slave. Is that a kind of a black movie?

Yeah, it's bad. It's bad. It goes back to being white book. You watch a backwards hook. I have a happy ownership. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you just do a fucking rude joke? What did he made it?

You know what? I want you to leave. I want you to never come back here. He said, would you watch it backwards so it has a happy ending? On 12 years of slave. Which doesn't make sense. Well, actually it does,

because I mean, he did, he was a musician in New York before he got kidnapped. But it goes back to, it's the same ending as the beginning. He's free. Yeah, so. It's a down joke, y'all. You use it up.

It's supposed to be on the movie Roots. Yeah, yeah. Why people watch Roots backwards so it's a down joke y'all it's supposed to be on the movie roots yeah yeah yeah why people watch roots backwards so it has a happy ending oh Jesus yeah you watch Philadelphia back which he gains weight and you watch this studio main main backwards is an old joke what why why is why to Jews watch porn back backwards because they want to see the the prostitute yeah, what is it? Get the money back to get the money back Have you ever got a prostitute? Never never never close. What's the closest thing to a prostitute?

Almost every other girl Almost have every other girl Dad, have you ever got the prostitute? Nope never Joe. No, you're lying. Well, Joe's not your life. You're herpes That's why I know there wasn't from a prostitute Yeah, that was from one of multiple different girls possibly. That was bad decision man, you've never had a prostitute. No, look at me. I'm looking right at you. Yeah, so look away Brian Have you ever had a prostitute? Oh, keep talking to Joe I'm looking right at you. He hasn't looked away. Brian, have you ever had a prostitute?

Oh, keep talking to Joe. Joe, what were you saying about it? Have you had one? No, no, no. They were some, if he thinks they're there, but no. What? No, I want to get into it. I'm not the fucking, I never had a prostitute.

I've had a prostitute. I'm, I imagine. I've never, I've thought about it. And if I had the money at one point in my life, I certainly would have right now. I can you know if I ask out 50 girls I'll meet one that wants to fuck a fact that but it's a lot of work both the fucking and the essence You're playing the L the odds. I'm like I'm like charade in front of the Before the old days Wait see fuck long what do you mean supposed to I'm oh he used to do that he used to do I'm saying you know

Like some people hit on it. How did this happen? It's called a podcast. We talk. Yeah, but this is the one thing you asked me. I've been saying that you haven't even said my name yet. I'm getting to you. Okay, but first we want to find out my sexual history.

Yes, he's got herpes. I just found that out. Why are you talking about you having herpes? That's terrible. Back to Joe. That's what the Z's are. You ever want to brought it up? I've never brought it up. You've already been on show. Originally on show. What was the black, black movie light? Yeah, right back to Joe that's what

I What was the black movie light I don't have I have perfect cholesterol you got a lie. I have low hypertension. I don't have hypertension either You got diabetes. I do not have diabetes fat Calling you fat. No, he said what do you got fat? You meant like what diseases that you have? I listen, I don't have anything I have a high iron. I got checked out and a high food intake What everyone's so accusatory on this podcast. It's a very mean podcast. I mean,

I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean,

I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean,

I mean, I mean, I have to know massage. You mean massage Like that hand jobs. I've done that. I've done that. I've never even paid for a hand. I have the other thing I'll try I think what the other thing is to yeah, what is the other job blow jobs? You guys are so happy imagination blow jobs No, no, not ready. That doesn't run. You blow you paid somebody to no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no I mean, I don't know if that's officially an escort. I think that it that isn't escort. Yeah, I've had that Massage is an escort. Well, I'll say yeah, well naked massage. Yeah, well she must she's naked too. Yeah, that's not what I got Oh, you would just naked I don't want to Try and what are you married? Are you married? No, okay, right? What you don't want to talk about what you don't you I don't understand what you're saying

You're saying stuff and then you're saying, you're giving, I'm answering your question, but not going further into detail. I know, but what am I supposed to do with that? Nothing, just don't ask me the question. Let's move on to somebody else. I will. Have you ever had a prostitute?

Never had a prostitute. Ever. Will is celibate, did you know that? Still? Still. Is what it is, man. I just walked, is that count? Okay, so he's never had a prostitute I you you're celibate

Here's her bitch. You know why you have no arms celibate. Yeah, why why come I want to be celibate Really? Oh, this is the worst all that's for that You want to be celibate because you want to be celibate? No because I want to change my life man I changed my life in 2007. I lost weight stopped being sick I started riding more I started riding scripts I stopped having random sex and I started you know taking care better not taking better care of myself so you you don't have sex with women because you're not a relationship with me because I want my body control I want me to be in control whether it's procrastinating playing video games, eating bad foods, having sex just because having sex.

I love all these things. So you don't have, so you're with a woman and you're gonna have sex with her. You're gonna be lover. You're gonna be a wife. If I get a girl, yeah, it's not. I ain't gonna be a wife. But, you know, if I like a girl,

how long has your fence has your sex? March, 2007. Really? What? Seven and a half years. I'm looking like that. I do. about like a girl how long has it been since you had sex March 2007 really Seven and a half years. I don't look it like that. I do. How do you look at it? That's great. I look at it like that the day by day Okay, so sex to you now is it's just not a thing is not you don't watch porn either right? I watch a lot of porn So you masturbate. Yeah, get it out. So I have to I control these bitch they gonna control over my walking but are they bitches if you want to respect cause they they talk my not my song I don't I'm here with my girlfriend I bitch I'm a jerk off anyway to your face they don't wow it's the most it's

the sweetest way this is a religious he's like listen to bitch you don't control me but I will only make love to you it's a it's fucking weird to me that you're out, I'm not respecting them, I mean, respecting yourself, but these are bitches that you'll go jerk off to the face. Don't let the white bitch tell your part, man, it just a word. It doesn't explain who they are. You guys should fucking really take that note. It feels like a bad Thanksgiving, though.

This is literally the worst podcast I've ever done. This is great. I think we're in the studio, man. This studio. We're exploring the new space. We're working out the kinks. Yeah. Listen.

Great band. Hold on. Hold on. Let me ask you a question. What's wrong with being celibate? Naked massage on I jerked off. You have to be happy. Naked massage on I jerked off.

You're happy. And this was like fucking 20 years ago So you fucking happy you dragged that out of me wrong? I killed him in 1990, but I am happy why because that a lot of carmics don't do that fucking real life I do that. I do that. It makes me feel good that you fucking you admitted it because now We're you a year ago, so what I did it I Have a girlfriend she's one of fucking nobody yeah, well, she's not listening to this show Listen to it, but I just let's say one of her friends will hear it and tell her yeah, you 20 years ago Hold on man, what's all of these celibate man?

Let's know I think it's not enjoyable to me. What? You got, you know, you know, it's wrong. It's just weird for a guy, especially with a huge dick like yours, to be celibate. Especially if you're not religious, you have a limited time to get late you don't have her piece I'm like is no that's like reason I'm fine. I'm a I'm married. I support you I think it's like owning it's like owning a fucking brand new Mercedes and taking the bus. Yeah, man I mean you have a massive cock. How do you know we got a macy's day float? I didn't know me. It's massive Have you seen the picture? Well, he shows it. I don't want to see it. Do you think I don't know you do you want to see this? I don't want to see it. I'm telling I do not want to see it.

But will I? Because I got to keep it. Have you seen the picture Robert? The best thing is the face the face is face on your deck. It's a zippies like crazy money for a fiction. Like it's a sad face like here. You don't need money for this overgrown dick people. Please help me. Please help me please help me that's too big he has a face on his dick since March of

2007 oh yeah the faces the the face is what I remember I've never gotten past the dick to be honest with you I believe I stay right at that fuck a big mule it's so massive it's so I don't even know how blood gets to the whole thing the dozens I don't know how it stands up they're gonna stand straight I don't even know how blood gets to the whole thing. It doesn't I don't know how it stands up Or stand straight. I don't like seeing other penises even on game of thrones. There's too many fucking penises They showed penises on game with all non-stop. Why? They just do because why not? But I don't even like penises in my my my when

So you watch Japanese porn or the Lesbians lesbian spanking each other and shit like that. I... less beans less beans bank in each other like that and so less beans being each other up and less beans fucking i like that's a shudder angel so when you uh... when there's a dick involved that's all i got the jerk off to and then they cut to the guy right when i'm coming it's bad timing when all of a sudden they show you the penis and you like just about the com

uh... i like you like you like you like you like you like to stop so you like to see the penis i like I like only when they're huge. Like I. So really, I find it like interesting. Like I actually, I must say when I watch porn with guys with small penises, you know, I'm like, I got this guy in smashing it. I need to see a guy handling his business the way I would handle my business. There's like two guys bigger than you and porn. So how do you, it's a very limited, every dig is small to you. Yeah, well it's like this guy again, he's only got nine inches.

He's a horse. No, I understand what you're saying. It's remarkable. I'm almost more impressed with the girl's breathing techniques of taking it. We're like, boom, come on, you're almost going to get through it. Boom.

Boom. It sounds like a magic trick. Yeah. real. Come on, you're almost gonna get through it. Sounds like a magic trick. Yeah. As far as the layers, I've never heard that, that, that, that is true, though. They have to develop certain techniques to take certain dicks in certain holes. It's like deep sea diving. They have to learn how to breathe different. Yeah, like even when they, like, blow a guy with a big dick, they have to learn how to breathe. Like you have to have your nasal passages. So, you're following the actual, you you can have you can have coping cough what is that called? Caldacov. I like his description of it though. Coping cough. Coping cough. Coping cough. Coping. I messed up the word. Everybody. It's okay well. It's all right well.

I got the gist. What is it called? The gist. You because no one corrected you. I think. Did you know the R lit up in the table too? By the way, did you see? I did see it. It doesn't light up that bright though. I think we need to. I can make the.

I can make. You know, I made a table like this. You made a table like this. I made a table like this. I'm a table like this. I also know how you floated here. For the. For the. I could make the I could make a land lord you know I made a table like this you made a table like I made a table like this just like this I also now you floated here Can I don't I don't need something to the studio no I don't want to talk about some jokes

A lap I made I'm I'm bringing next week We made a human skin Years and those with this studio. I'm promising. What is it? I'm just bringing in you don't like it I don't know if you're coming back. Be gracious He wants to give you a present and he's being serious. I don't even know. How about if it's a shitty present? What we'll put it behind the gorilla? What's Behind me and you got to you wife give you a watch

Yeah, but actually I love the watch. Let me see. Don't I do jokes come from somewhere watch I what kind of what yeah, we gotta work Mavado. Is that a Mavado? Yeah. That's really nice. Is it? Yeah, it's a nice watch. Welcome back to Watchtower. I think it's funny because I understand what you're saying about the penis. I want the penis in it, but if it's a gross penis, I don't want to watch the penis.

What's a gross penis? I'll show you. Circus like on circumcised. Oh, yeah, it's like an alien. It's like an alien. It's like an alien. Because it goes in and out. It's like, I don't know to watch the first of gross penis. I'll show you. On circumcised? Oh yeah, it's like an alien. I don't want to see that. As it goes in and out, it's like, I don't know what that is. I didn't say I want the penis in it.

You did say you want it. No you did. I said, I have, when there is, I would love it. I would love it. When there's a big penis, I'm interested in it. I'm not turned off by it. Like I don't look away. I'm fine, interesting.

But I'm also fine if there's no penis in it. It's not like I'll only watch porn with a penis in it. Sometimes when the penis is too big though It's like the opposite of how well feels really like she wouldn't enjoy me. I can't watch this Yeah, I want to be able to relate I want to look as similar to my penis as I want like a little penis. I want a guy with glasses. Why are you making assumptions about me? No, I'm saying I'm just saying my I don't relate that's hot talk on why I'm going to picture your penis

I left the light on and I just ran Flashlight for will just exhaust my battery now We have plugs right there you can plug you Blue plug is for any year phone you want to charge Oh, now we're talking. Oh, you're happy with that I'm happy with everything except the time we started. I'm sorry, dude. All right, you know what?

I'm sorry, Joe. That wasn't hard. Sorry, what's up, buddy? Let me step in. I'm sorry, Joe. I'll take proper policies. We relate because I was recording an episode of the bonfire on Sirius XMG95.

If you fucking say it, one more time. Jesus Christ. One day is a Wednesday, six day PM East. He wants an apology from Robert Patrick Teller. I gave it to him. I will. I will put luck in the face and apologize. I looked him in the face.

You were plugging your phone in. And just for you, it was the end of the face. No, you sat as fine with my apology. I was satisfied. I'm unsatisfied with Will who was in the other room coming back and rekindling. Yeah, rekindling. Stop rekindling. Yeah, that's not real anger.

I like. I'm not angry. Can I get back to this point issue here with the penis in it? I think you need the penis in it. Yeah. Because I want to relate to... I want to... But isn't it weird? I'm the penis. Yes. So this is the way when you're coming and they just cut to a shot of the penis. And then you're coming to a penis. I mean, now you're coming to a penis.

I think it's only weird when I pause on it too. Yeah. You need a money shot. Like, you need to see the money shot. I don't need the money shot. You know what my shot, my what shot really turns me on is when they kiss. What the fuck? What kind of fucking door is this?

I like kiss fucking. I, I, I, I, I, I get in front of Bobbi, Bobbi Kelly. I like when they kiss also. Thank you man. When they just start smashing each other and I like it. I like it. I like other I like when they when they start making out and kissing Oh, it gives it a reality. Yes, when they come in it's like sucked it Chuck dick lick pussy perfect

You know, I like the way they start making out it makes it like they like each other like it's like before you like Consumers and yes, Bob, you know, I like before that. You know know I like before that when they have some small talk I love small talk That small hey what's up? I'm funny right? My boss is not here you're boss not here I think it's really realistic Where your boss at he went to for car. Okay, you know what? I'll agree with that. I like the the build up the build up Thank you build up is great, but they don't have to do it. The kissing never, in my mind, it's not good

because it doesn't feel real because they always do like half ass kissing. It's not like a real make out. It's like, you know, the porn stuff is like the go-off. But you can't set, you know. I know you're right. There is that kissing.

I'm talking about when they're catching kiss. Real kissing. Passion kiss. It's some of those videos they passion kiss. And a lot of them are Spanish shits. But the Spanish don't like to make out. And they start fucking deep tongue in, and that's when it builds up, you know that minute where it's like the only other thing a chick can do right now is like, I got a suck

a dick. You know what I mean? When you have a kiss a chick, it's almost like a rant. I got a suck a dick. You know what I mean when you have a kiss a chick I'm like, you're gonna be the rant. Yeah, you know what? I'd be watching a lot lately. It's food. It's super. Oh, shoot. What was that? That is super front.

What happened? Something happened. It was right on the punchline too. It's not recording. There was a power out of first thing. No. Did it stop recording by? It was at. I don don't know the license flicker. Are you recording? Are you still recording over there? We're still on YouTube. Okay, so let's watch and lately

These women these women they hide they hide these they had these hidden cameras They had a plumber come over and they they freaking wearing almost nothing with the plumber and next know they start smashing each other. What was it they were fighting? No, no, no, no, I haven't sex. Okay, I'm sorry. Do you have you seen this? This is real like the, yes, these were real plumber and they blow out their plumber's face.

It's a real plumber and they have hidden cameras and they talk to the camera first and say, hey, look, listen, I got a plum from over So he does he know he's been with no ideas. Oh, that's yeah, so she comes and then she starts flirting with them He comes over to fix up plumbing and then she goes in other room We're almost like nothing and say hey, what's up with like the picture? Yeah, did you fix it yet? He goes no, I'm still working and then then she won the end of the day. She drops a towel and he go, your towel fell. She said, I know what you're going to want to do. And you just, they stopped making out. Wow. That's great. I want to be a plumber. You're having a well-tell it was awesome. Yeah.

Yeah. Google. And when you're upon size, Google, uh, or search, uh, hidden camera plumber. Done. You hear that, America? I didn't want you to point that Google uh... or search hidden camera plumber done you hear that america hidden camera there's women out there they sell you cameras catching

them job is to see how many men are willing to cheat on their wife so he's a married plumber married yeah some of them are mad at you what if you guys are a union I don't want them fucking scabs So who's wrong the guy all these women you know these women why try What's a trap and it's in trap man and they smash a lot of greed and smash a few of them without condoms. Oh That's as dangerous

They blur his face out they both are first out all the time Sounds dangerous and erotic. I will. Are you fix it right? I'm trying. What's what's happening? Everything. You know, studio problems. Yeah, we're recording. So I mean, it's just it just It seems like this whole part. That's a new computer. I didn't random everything. I feel weird that I got embarrassed there about the the escort question Why should be embarrassed?

It's here's what's weird about it. Well for me is that you you admitted to it kind of What I would do this what I do no fucking did I don't talk about something no and I just don't talk about it But you admitted to it, but then you go, but I don't want to talk about it. Yeah just don't talk about it. But you admit it to it, but then you go, but I don't want to talk about it. So it's like, I was like, that's it. But I'm not. But I'm not.

But I'm not. But I'm not. But I'm not. But I'm not. But I'm not. I don't give a shit. I get where you're coming from. I feel like I upset you.

No, you're not upset. If you come on, dude, you're fine. Look, man, I'm not going to. If you, that's personal shit, you want to talk about it. Don't talk about it. I should have said no, but I was just being honest, but I never had an escort. Yeah, then I've had them.

I just thought that you might have them too, but I've had what you, you did. I have one, there were times in my life where I really fucking needed one. Well, you've done what you did, I've done too. I've done like I've gotten a massage. I mean around, I've gotten a massage where I

would go keep going so many times to this lady and she wouldn't one time she took my hands and put it on my own dick. I was like you do you do and I was like no no no you do she was like no no you do. She was raising. Yeah. And she got to the point where I just went in and I go, I go, listen, I want two hours just legs. And she was like, she just did it. Yeah. Did that turn you on? I can actually question. Passive.

Escort, is that like a nice way of saying prostitute? Yeah, yeah. So why they call it Escort? Because it's a nice way of saying prostitute. Exactly. So they prostitutes. Yeah. Because I thought the Escort was like, you know, go that Escort you to dance. Escort you Because it's a nice way of saying prostitute exactly. So they prostitutes. Yeah. Because I thought the Escort was like, you know, go that Escort you to dance, I think the reason is because

when they would advertise like in the back of the village voice or something, they couldn't advertise prostitute. Can't say hooker. So they would say Escort because it's legal to pay somebody to escort you somewhere. So that's how it started. I know that. Learn something new. I thought I just thought, you know, it's a date. A date that you're paying for, so you know, you can't get a girl to take you out, so you get a date to take you out. That's adorable.

I think you can do that also. Yeah, that's a really good thing. I love that it's like the high money ones. Yeah, you can pay an escort to go to the metropolitan ball with you. Yeah, and then you fuck them for, you know, we smash them. Yeah, smash them. That cost it cost more to take to the ball and then smash the ball. Yeah, yeah, yeah, probably cost the same.

You're paying for the company. So how come how come women, the prostitutes in the street can't just say I'm an escrow and the cops come around. Guys, wait, wait, you know know if you're on the street looking yeah You got more problems as it comes to you like your hotel and shit and they pick you up And I think they solicit the sex first and then they get them They got the woman was like we'll go get hot dogs together. They wouldn't arrest it But once they even arrest anyone for this stuff in this day and age what don't say at the time? It's a waste.

Yeah, let's hold your guff. Yeah. I mean, that's another reason to support Donald Trump, right? I'm sure that you will not be wasting our time on the Trump administration. You did Donald Trump's full prostitution? Of course, you think Donald Trump never will hook her? Can you think Donald Trump can win? No, I don't think so.

Why not? Seems like a... Donald Trump to me is like a weird combination of like top 1% abilities and bottom 1% abilities. And the bottom one, but like he's internalized none of the Godfather, like it's business not personal, keep your friends, he cannot separate the personal from the business.

Like he went after Megan Kelly again today. Again today, today, today, today. He went after Megan Kelly again today today. Today he was on back, but he was on stern. And he had the opportunity to go after and he didn't. But then last night he was tweeting back. Yeah, like and and is nothing to be gained from it. And that's like I there's a lot of things about Donald Trump. I actually like, but that would be a terrible thing

in a present having Mexico pay for it. I'm not against building a wall. No, but that's not you really didn't as possible build really that's possible to all uh... of course is possible who builds walls better than donald trump nobody uh... would they do it i don't know and then have mexico pay for you know that that i think is less likely but i let's listen frozen mexican funds i don't understand what he's talking about you really did not keep the mexicans away a wall i I think that it would definitely help control the border, which I don't think means that

you're anti-immigration. I think the wall, right? If they were to really control the border and actually make a dent in getting illegal immigrants out, the people who would want them back the most are actually Republicans because they need the labor. business owners need the labor people rich people who have uh... nanny's and stuff like that the labor so but but we like it to the point the idea of controlling the border is not offensive

to me you can't just have it's like it's ridiculous that somebody who says listen we just should never free for all is some of anti-immigrant not anti-immigrant to have a free for all we should build a wall rather the dicks. Yeah, well I have to go to Iraq and bombing all the oil fields and take it open. Super friends. I'm for it. I like Bernie Sanders.

What do you think about Bernie Sanders? I like Bernie Sanders too actually, but I don't think I wouldn't want him making rules that pertain to business and the economy i think it would shut things down what about a ticket of sanders and trump i don't see them uh... sanders and that that's not gonna be present he's not being vice president he's not gonna take vice president he's gonna go president that's it

do you think he doesn't know who he didn't even know who he'd have as as vice president right now though right now that you know that they don't he doesn't even know who he'd have as vice president right now though. Should you know that? They don't do that till they know. Shouldn't he have an idea of who knows who he is? Well, there's a talk about him in Rick Perry because Perry hasn't come out and said shit about him. I'll tell you this about Trump though, but like if I really can't support him, like

I really don't. But when you fantasize about him being president, it's like I remember when I was a kid when we went to the moon and stuff like that i would like to have a president who wants america to be like america do big things you don't think you don't think uh... a president should be more focused on what's going on domestically but internationally both both i think that uh... the

the site it it draws a nation together a special nation of a lot of immigrants now it's good to have listen You don't think it's important wait till China lands a man on Mars and we all watch and say shit that used to be us now We're nothing yeah, but China's been focused domestically for the past 25 years and not being a global headroom on a world police There's China's stress us to them. Now it's just, it's just, this China's R, fuck blink, like, Oh, suck a dick,

Beijing. We got blink and R. What's an elephant? I'm sure every component of this system was made in China, Rob. Did you hear what he said? No, he goes, but it's an L for them.

Oh. And they control the cell phone technology. They have all the minerals needed. I think it's amazing that, fuck, I really believe Trump is amazed is like holy shit I can't believe this is happening Well, he's changing my mind this far. He's like he made this far. I guess. Yeah, I think he was on stern

I think it was this morning or yes I would but he called in and he was like I You could hear in his tone. I can't believe it But he gave an opportunity to go after Kelly. And he was like, I don't want to do that. And you couldn't resist last night. And you know, you know, it's even funnier about the whole, not funnier, but more ironic about the whole Trump thing

and how far he's come. If he had left out like three sentences, he said he'd be way, even more popular right now. Like if he had just said we want to control the border and we have to get rid of that bad element coming from Mexico. If he didn't say they were all rapers sort of it, then a lot of people like me, but like, yeah, I can come with that. But he, like,

don't you think we got all those people who wanted to hear that? Yeah, but no, he was those people who like, he said it. He would have had them anyway just by talking tough about the issue. He did not need to say the extra like insulting yeah the bad people who's on good people the rapists their drug dealers that's where he lost everybody do you think politics aside can bernie sanders overcome being

elderly and jewish and the first name bernie and calling himself a socialist no absolutely not but but do you think brock who's saying obama we overcame that people saying he's from Kenya his And calling himself a socialist. No, no, absolutely not. But don't you think Barack Hussein Obama? We overcame that people saying he's from Kenya his name's Hussein He's black. Yes, he's black. Well, he's haves. I mean, Tom. I think they they overcame that so how can they can overcome Bernie? Because Obama appeared to be a first of all Obama is a star. I mean, even even if he will wait, that's said, the 2004 DNC, he's fucking blew that shit off the

roof. And I think he being I think being black helped him not hurt him, especially in a democratic primary. He's like the rock, man. He is that pre he has stage presence. And you just love him. You just want to watch him. We want to listen to him. Absolutely. And he's got to think he's got to think she'll have. should have has reason all this talk Yeah, it was like that too. Yeah, Clinton, Clinton, Clinton. Yeah, Clinton I mean, it's like Trump. You just want to hear him fucking say something crazy. Yeah, he used to his face and he I just want to see his face expressions even though a top shit raises like yeah, I don't know I'm too used to doing really well these people are all losers The Rosy-Odonal quip is the funniest thing in the history of college.

It's like he was an MC, like he's like an 80s MC at a club. But it's like, he's listening to somebody, his face, his reactions are fucking hilarious. Yeah, he's like, he's really kind of cool. The best one was when, who did he say at the debate where he, oh, when, um, fuck, Rand Paul said something and he goes actually wrong you're not having a good night you just said that. But that was like when he called everybody I've given them money. He goes I've donated to most of these people on this stage and when they brought the

helicopter Clinton thing he goes I wanted it to be at my wedding she came to my wedding and everyone's like oh fuck all right. Hey Pader. Yeah. Gave her money and she showed up. Yeah. Yeah. No the question was did you give have you taken money

From people I believe create right to for the or have you given anybody money? He's again, I give everybody here money and then one of the guys went you ever get me money, but I think it Yeah, Carlson said that yeah, and Wisconsin Get off your phone and listen to the fucking chair. Yeah, I'm I don't I don't give a shit. No, you're not. You're not. You're not doing anything. I googled what Donald Trump said to Bob Paul. How are we doing? I wasn't googling. He would tell it how you're

going to out. He three under the bus. He was going to get a porn. It's not bad. Um, yeah, that kind of shit was like, uh, fuck. I mean, you can't vote for Trump. I mean, you just can't do it. You got a boring ass. I asked. He's cheating. She's winning the polls. He's slot-slobbling them in the polls long way to go I support K6 that's what I'm voting for now. Do you I don't think Hillary is Hillary gonna make it through all this crazy shit? I don't know not saying gozi in the emails What's what's gozi all the emails? All right, they're related no the email. I think she she she probably broke the law

Yeah, they're gonna I mean they're related no the email i think she she she probably broke the law yeah they're going to i mean they're gonna fucking get her we had a bit of coming now uh... by the so there's rumors that there's there grabbing in everybody there's a rumor that they were trying to see what if gore could come back run on that they have the democratic party has fucking nobody they have no carry their looking for a plan they can take carry carry carry on a carry looks terrible not only that

visually i don't want to look at him and but listen they're gonna you're gonna end up with something boring like jet bush can you imagine a Biden Trump debate oh oh it'd be the greatest night could you imagine if you know you better Biden listen what about what about Colin Powell he's a Republican

oh sorry Colin Powell no actually Colin Powell said he'd be dumb He'll be Democratic all the public. He's going for Obama Biden and Trump are on a debate. It would be I mean it would be Millions I mean There is a candidate there is a candidate Biden who Biden and Trump debate would be unfuckable it blue I would love bloom. I think bloomer would be unfuckable. I would love Bloomberg. I think Bloomberg would be good. I'm in his ability. I actually think he could win. I think he would pop right into it. He's a probably like he's a public and then he became an

independent, but he's extremely moderate on social issues. Everybody knows he's competent. And you know what he would do? He could pull the moderate Republican vote to go to that side because he is a business man. He won three terms in liberal New York she is nobody's gonna call him this he's going to shit with and he's a billionaire I don't know why he knows how to make money like Trump he's got that he's got that he's got that I got more money than Trump right yeah and he's always the smartest guy and I don't know why I don't know why he's not being

Talk about our own maybe doesn't want to how could you not want to be president well Where's the other one? That's the reason I would go for it. When you have $12 billion, don't want to do anything. That's not true. You don't have to do it. You don't have to do it. I want to hear Scopus opinions. If you have so much money, why do I don't have to be president?

I did four or three years in the city. I made a mistake, I didn't want to do that. No, because what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what a, what you know, you're present in the United States. How could you resist that? Will wanted to be a compromise in the third of Haiti at one time. Did you really? It's a lot of stress. How do you do that? That was whitecliff. That was whitecliff.

Oh, sorry. Hey, you really think it's over for Hillary? No, I know, but I don't think she's gonna win. I think, no, the Benghazi and the emo you really think. Not Benghazi. Benghazi's irrelevant. It's the email. You really think the emails is a big deal?

I think they're, I think in the news cycle we live in now, absolutely. Well, she wiped, she digitally wiped a server and then pretended she didn't even know it wiping. Oh, that was the worst reason she got, what do I wipe it down with a call? She's lying through her teeth. So you have to ask yourself, okay, why is somebody lying through their teeth?

And the obvious answer is because she's dirty and she can't tell the truth. The truth comes out. I imagine it has to be bad enough that she felt she couldn't tell the truth now, so that's why I think they need a plan B. Now she may keep it under wraps, but something is bad. It seems like both parties are in complete disarray. There's no other Republicans in that, and such a surrogate. But there's a Trump's rule card.

There's no clear guy. It's a year and a half away or something I'd say Ben Carlson could have came out and fucking won this shit if he didn't go on that person Carson Ben Carson if he didn't come out and say that you can catch gay in prison. Well, here's the thing with that guy He's charismatic. He's funny and he's high. He's really intelligent He's Saying that you catch gay in's really intelligent. Ben Carson. Yeah, he knows. He's done the same thing. I know. I'm not gay in prison. Is intelligent. That was the bullshit dude. He's highly intelligent. I mean,

but when he said into the baby goes, I believe I'm the only one who's separated twins and done brain surgery, which is kind of funny and kind of like go fucking. Yeah. I'm smart. Also, he talked about the person like Ricky Henderson during the defense. Yes. Carson doesn't take those kind of things. That was all right. Oh, excuse me, babe. I don't I don during the debate. Yes, yes. The question doesn't take those kind of things. That was a, oh, excuse me, Ben. I don't mind him.

I like him. No, you need somebody as president who has some experience running things like Bloomberg. A lot of the trouble that Obama got into was clearly a lack of experience, like the healthcare rollout. I wouldn't roll out a new Comedy Cellar website for reservations without being sure. Sure, that you could make reservations. Is there one coming? Is one coming? I can update my body. I already did it. I'm just saying the idea of having a new website the biggest thing in history and no one's check to see if they can actually sign up only some

within experience. It's not stupidity. That's an experience. Well what patient snack are you on? I had these poultry balls and melted in my pocket. Can you make less noise with your... You can hear it? Yeah melted in my pocket. Can you make less noise with your... You can hear it? Yeah, we can hear it. Can you hear it too, don't you? Well, where would be the greatest political pun to put on like a new show? Like, also Vince, he's like, I just snack.

I have a snack. He's gonna go jerky. Why are you talking about that? I said go jerky, yeah. Yeah, it's a hasty joke. Yeah, no. I don't want a lot to eat in the studio. Well, yeah, it's a hasty joke. Yeah I don't want to eat in the studio. We are not let's the owner is here I'm not you know, he's supposed to eat me here

It's protein. Voters don't like buddy. Do you remember what you get listen? You can't listen not only can you not eat here the fucking guy who told me never to have anybody eating this place is Sitting right there. I'm putting away in my mouth. No, no dude Will I'm not fucking around put the shit away you I've been eating the bathroom on my knees over the toilet the bathroom like fucking its Catholic church Do you remember what you texted me on my birthday Robert happy birthday? Love you buddy, what else? You have a big cock no Thanks about the other comedians. What? You said I'm sure none of the other comedians have even bothered to

Yeah, that was a joke though. Yeah, but will Always text me on my birthday. It's because he has a birthday app. It's called I'm not It's called keep friends with whitey app. He's got it and he actually says like really nice things like what? I don't want to say but but will is will is a special guy. So can he eat near? Yes, that's my things. Like what? I don't wanna say, but Will is a special guy. So can he eat in here? Yes, that's my point. Okay, so Will can eat.

Dan? What about Dan? Yeah. What about Joe? I'm not familiar with your birthday, but the heartbeat's staying. I didn't bring up the heartbeat, I mean, the sandwich right now.

I didn't wanna say it, but I'm chasing, buddy. I'm against delivery right now. Do you understand what power you just gave Will. I got you. You understand, now, anytime he's on the show, that's a damn long way. Whatever other guests I have, I got a Roman through here.

He can eat. He's been in a lot of snacks, man. He could eat here, but someone's got to measure. It's clean, that's all. So people we can eat here. Of course. Just give me more work. Wait a minute, we can eat in here again.

Yeah, he has to be cleaned. Yes, okay. Did I get a clean up. Yeah, it has to be cleaned. Yes. OK. Do I have to clean up that part? I got to put it away. Which never has happened in the history of the world when anybody told anybody they could eat somewhere. It's a problem.

Well, we clean a lot. I mean, right? These two fucking guys make sure everything spik and spam when we leave here. Now, why about the crumbs on your chest? And enough with the slurs. There's no crumbs on my chest. I haven't had a carb or a sugar since last Wednesday. Oh, that's why you cranky. I want to throw

a fucking coaster ready. You can have you can have hot sauce and ranch. I do know that while you're doing the same thing. Yeah, it's it's let's go get wings after that. Downstairs. We can't get wings. I can wings absolutely the best one I can have chips I can't have the chips I'll have the celery I'm curious what the seller and the village on the gun have the same food Well, they have the same wings They have I think they have better food over there. They make their own chips over They have a colombo over there. Oh my god. Oh, you want me to get so I'll bring something to the olive tree Just for you. We'll keep you the chip She has the chip. Why don't you have the chip? I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it.

I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it.

I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it.

I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to get it. I'm going to do a big renovation of the allotry and change the whole menu Are you kidding me? Of the allotry kitchen not the allotry, you know I listen keep the same food right? Some some of it one thing can I have you keep the harbor tonight one thing? Yeah, what you make breakfast scotch-bonded peppers good idea

Well your brunch is delicious. Oh, you got to keep it salmon Benedict. Here's a deal Sam and we have salmon Benedict. Yes, dude. Are you crazy? It ends at 2 p.m. I'll keep it then I need my here's a deal sam and we have sam and benedin yes dude are you crazy? that's a two p.m. i'll keep it then i don't even know uh... we're gonna take a break real quick uh... our first break to take uh... some peace

i gotta do a read so we'll be back in around uh... uh... five to ten minutes okay so everybody in the chat staying in there deep who's taking uh... chat notices we're gonna get to the chat room right when we get back, we've had some malfunctions with the computer here, I don't know what the fuck's going on, but we still got everything live on the video which is great. Liz says no eating in the studio. I guess there's no eating in the studio. Sorry Liz. No, Liz said there's no eating in the studio, no eating in the studio. I don't want to eat in the studio. Sorry, there's no list said there's no eating in the studio, no eating in the studio. I don't want

to eat in the studio. I don't want to do with that. Anyways, we'll be back in 10 minutes. You guys stay right there. There you go. That's it. Alright, there's only a few more preseason games to go before the regular season kicks in and you could start the season off by winning $2 million in weekwannadraftkings.com, American America's favorite one week fantasy football site. It's the biggest fantasy football contest ever.

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No season long commitment. It's fantasy football on demand. The way everybody likes stuff now. Nobody watches TV the night the show's on. It's always a few days later. You binge watch, you watch it when you want, you do when you want, you play when you want. All right, play what you want, when you want,

with the plays you want, just pick your players, pile up the points, and pick up your cash. That's it. You've never experienced football like this. Every game feels like the playoffs, even in week one, and every broken tackle or a spectacular catch, you could take you closer, that could take you closer to two million dollars. That's two million bucks.

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$1 million, $ one millionaire maker. Enter Kelly for free. Enter it now at draftkings.com. That's draftkings.com. All right, we're back. What's up guys? Uh, we had some, uh, failures, uh, in the audio, which, look man, we got a whole brand new system in here.

We got a brand new 16 channel mixer. It's, it's no joke. We spared no expense. Everything's new. We're using, even we moved up from GarageBand to... Logic Pro. Logic Pro, which is a pro, you know, and it's... Yeah, some pretty serious stuff.

It's some pretty serious stuff. And the board, some stuff happening here. That's very nice. That's so fun. We're fixing it. Well, we have a lot. That's very nice. So, we're fixing it. Well, we have a lot. That camera, we fixed the wobbly camera. I'm back.

We're back. It's still a little wobbly. I'm sure people got to see say. It's not wobbly. I'm putting my elbow here. It's not wobbly. Well, back in, Wilson Vince, the truth. Joe List, monster voice, aka the negotiator, aka Dan Soda. we got the owner of all gnome and we have

Brian Scolaro famous for a long time yeah. Dan Soda. I got deep into my left. Did you just call Scopo me? Yep. I mean our Scopo. I'm gonna walk dude. I don't know.

You were distracted by Clawme of famous. Maybe it was uh I have no idea dude. I'm a little I'm up and gonna walk dude. I don't know You were distracted by calling me a famous maybe it was I have no idea dude I'm a little I'm a little flush to today. I'll be honest because I'm like you guys Right in the mic. Can you knock off in the mic? I thought I had a mic but I thought this news to it had cough protecting Coping cough protector Why is will always talk like he's being woken up out of a nap I want an eject seat. That's what I want. Trust or yeah, like one of those fucking Shanghai trap doors they had back in the day.

Just have you slide down to a Bella Hay. And Kelly's down there. What do you need? Imagine what ejects he have mass swings on it. Yeah, well, there's one thing that hasn't changed people bombing on this show think of for that bandana. Oh Thank you blanket I get the I'm writing the path of the AC it's you know Get your eye now By the minutes I am it's not that I like the watch. I'm going to see the eye by the minutes. I am vitamin. It's not

that I like the seat. I'm all right. No, no, no, you're not going to complain and then he's going to give you what you want and then you fucking doesn't matter. There you go, Joe, you got it. She's just, I mean, it's just terrible.

I like the coast. Just I got your head is enormous. He's the truth. He's the truth. He has so much knowledge in that is crazy. So much. Also, I believe my mother drank was's the truth. He's the truth. He has so much knowledge in there. That is crazy. So much knowledge. Also, I believe my mother drank while I was in the womb, but. This is, this is, it always happened. It when we moved up here, it was a, we had a lot of memory. The problems you said. Maybe we used to do shows at my house when I got the zoom. I used to love smoking cigarettes in your kitchen. We used to have my kitchen over on 420. We used to

do the show originally at my kitchen table. Me, Dan, and Joe, and then it became me, Dan, and Kelly. Joe, who? Derosa. I was on the show before Kelly. Well, you were on and off. Yeah, you got great ass heat, by the way. And then now we used to smoke cigarettes.

Yep. Oh, man, what a show that was. That's fun. You can't smoke up here either, though. I really want to see you. Really? Yeah. You can't smoke up here.

No smoking. I know that. There's no eating anymore see you. Really? You can't smoke up here. No smoking. There's no eating anymore either. That's what Liz and Nick said that. But yeah, that was fun, man. But remember, we do a whole hour, and then I'd look down at the board, and I'd be like, oh shit. And it just be gone. That happened a couple of times.

And I'd be like, but I always found it somewhere. We'd find some version of it. But we have all the whole show has been recorded. We always have all. We have three things that we do, I believe. We have a nice cast, we have the video, did you not do the nice cast? We haven't done nice cast in months. Oh, all right, what happened? We have two backups, so we're good.

Anyways, we were talking about before, we were talking about porn and then somehow gone on fucking Trump, a political discussion. What it is got you started working on whatever you were working on so you were gone yeah so we started talking politics and then I left because they were talking politics really you don't like politics politics sports for me and I besides my meter right now that was a treat I actually like politics I know it's, I've really learned to be, I love listening to politics in history. I was talking to my uncle who's a history buff

about the World War I, and how fucking crazy that war was. The flu. And how late we came into the war. And the Germans, you what that how you know the Germans you know How that started and then it wouldn't he about world world How world war one started in general or how we are involvement? To all of it to my all of it

I'm sorry, but yeah, we are My involvement what's that we our involvement? Oh? I was just saying historically accurate fact, but did I stumble on it? The guy who never says words right? But I know we're listening World War II, we came in right on time. No, we didn't. We came in late. There's a campaign late. Way late and the fact is it was World War II is that I mean happened because of how insulted Germany was how they were treated after World War I. Is that correct, no?

Yeah, that is correct. What happened? I was insulted, but they didn't like the sanctions they had on them. They were fiscally devastated. Fiscally. Say that. Fiscally. Wow.

Fiscally devastated. So I feel like an opponent. So let's go to the chat room.... deep what do you have for the chat best into comah says best into comah says it seems like an exciting president is all that matters these days well i think that does matter but i also think that uh... somebody that can uh... actually fix some things especially financially

obama i'm worried about i look at man, I'm worried about money. I'm worried about my kid's health care. I mean, now that I'm at this age, I'm worried about my future. Do you worry about personal? Are you worried about climate change? Are you worried about the fact that the ocean is becoming acidic? No, no. Philanjee's dying.

No, you're not worried about that at all. No, because I'm being dead by the time that happens The food chain's not completely being on to your son. He's concerned about the food chain, but Max is gonna be alive Max is gonna be alive. What do you mean if they can be a tarot. Yeah, there's you know, no I think Max will be alive, but I'm teaching Max to live in the woods. Hold on hold on are we are we Taking he's taking your kids with him though. Oh. Are we worse now or better when bush was around with with Watch to Fred then

Hi, let's go to the chat room one more time I think we're ready. We're off. Thank you. Jules Frederick says, you know what C-span That's funny. That was pretty funny. Life laughing bear says crossfire dude. That's funny. That was pretty funny. Laughing, laughing bear says, crossfire dude. That's funny. That was pretty funny. Keep going. Tabsca 33 says, Tabsca 33 says, looks like Bobby is a blackjack dealer with this new setup. That's the best. Literally the funniest thing said about this day. We got to wonder, we could play poker here.

I started poker tonight. I said we could play poker here. Fucking ten minutes into the show. I said we could play poker here. Fucking ten minutes. He did say he looked like he was involved in a shitty game of poker. It was wordy. Yeah, and I have way more charisma than you. And what show did you say it in the first fall start? The second fall. We should do a poker game. But you got to eat at a poker game. Can we eat up here? I said you can, but Liz, you know, it's your apartment, right now. Yeah, but Liz is, uh, you know, Liz is the boss. Liz is the boss. Um, what is we started the 11 when you said that? It's like you were wearing a color hat. Can we go see the Easter Bunny? That's how I try and not seem like a cunt. I have to just sound like a child. You know what? I'm glad you're working on that. I'm trying, man. All right,

good. What do you got? Uh, laughing bear says the studio set up makes it look like the guys are a litter of puppies Bobby just had. That's funny too. Yeah. A litter is that a term? A litter of puppies. That's what you throw. I mean, we've been fucking seven for seven.

Everybody's funny. He's got a little one. He's a little one. He's a little one. He's a little one. Yeah. Norman Liz is like when Stephen Jobs got five from Apple, though Stephen Jobs own Apple, but they you know, but Liz Actually, the committee she runs out. I heard sometimes listening to will is because Liz has to worry about it

Like yes, and that's my point. She's got enough to worry about yeah, you Stephen Jobs and she's a committee. You know come Stephen Also, he didn't own an apple. Yeah, he was just this is his apple even also he didn't own apple. Yeah, he was just the part. Yeah, but this is his apple. I know. This is not. You're the worm. Steve Jobs.

OK, you guys want to shoot everything will says down by reflexively. Oh, just because he said you a happy birthday with a smiley face. He was like, he was right. He's good enough. He's right. But you know, Steve Jobs didn't own apple. That's not the point.

Yeah, he started apple. He started apple. He started apple. He started apple point. Yeah, he started apple. He started apple. He started apple. He started apple. Of course he started apple. He started apple. Who's not an apple? Nothing, man.

I know something, but I know he didn't know it. He started apple. He started apple and then he started apple. He didn't know it. When it went public, he didn't know the biggest yeah. He was the first to fall in the fire. So that's no. He's about to lose more sense share to Liz.

All right, you know what? World's right. First time, which we had a bell. I'm gonna walk into the ocean. I'm gonna give a viking death. Yeah, I guess so. So anyways, back to that, I really enjoy politics talk now because it's affecting me.

It never affected me in my 20s and 30s. I didn't give a shit, but now I'm worried about social security. I'm worried about my kids health. The sad thing is, my kid, my kid has better health plan than me. And I go through SAG. The sad thing is, SAG is-

When we were young, screen actors guilt. I know what it is. The sad thing is, when we were young, I'm not even gonna get to do it. None of us cared about politics. When we were young, screen actors guilt. I know what it is. The sad thing is when we were young, we were not able to get to do it. None of us cared about politics when we were young, but then politics affected us when we were young. And it's sad that we only care about politics when we got old and reality is, we should care about politics from day one.

You should, but it's hard to get somebody a kid into politics. Well, that's not true because Obama, that's who Randolph Obama's campaign, that's who Obama got most people's support kid in the politics. Well, that's not true. Because Obama, that's who, that's who Randall Obama's campaign. That's who Obama got most people's support. And was the kids. This is the least fun I think I've ever had in my life.

Yeah, yeah. This is your, I'll tell you this, though, Robert, agree that once you have kids, so many things that used to roll your eyes at or think, or people were just being uptight. When you have kids, you see a lot of things differently in the world, even like permissiveness on TV and all that kind of stuff. I thought I wouldn't hear my kids watch on TV. I'm outraged by what's on TV. I'm like, I'm worried about my kid is

watching some Taylor Swift video and there's like, there's like little SNM overtones. I'm like, can't they put something on it? You know, it's real. Your life changes dramatically. Your opinions change, your thoughts change, your empathy for for humans change once you have a child because all of a sudden I look at other kids I look at other people's kids who you I'm on the here's a perfect example. I'm on the plane first class Doing it big stuff. I changed my seat the last second because it was a first class seat with nobody next to it And I had the bulkhead first. I was like fuck it. Let me get this seat nobody will probably blah blah blah So I'm sitting there all of a sudden this big woman Viking type of woman. We're gonna you with nobody next to it. And I had the ball kid for us, so I was like, fuck it, let me get this seat. Nobody will probably blah, blah, blah. So I'm sitting there all of a sudden,

this big woman, Viking type of woman. We're gonna do. Yes, bigger than me. Taller, but as big as me, right? With a fucking, it looks like maybe a two and a half year old kid. You know, because you know what a two year old looks like. He's bigger than my kid. And she sits right next to me with this

he's fighting he's flipping out he's he's you know being a scutch I know he's but I'm sitting like I I start smiling a couple years ago I'm like fuck me yeah I got damn it I was laughing my ass off she's like she's looking to me like, are you crazy? He spilled the wine. I go, he's tired. I know he's tired, he's gonna go out in a couple minutes. Especially if he's gonna wine. Wait. But I, I helped this woman. She goes, can I go the back?

I go, yeah, I got him. I watched him while she went to the bathroom. Now, I didn't know she was in alcohol because she was going to the bathroom to actually do shots. She told you, by the end of the flight, she asked me for my number. But listen, here's the thing. Yeah, it was weird.

But it was, I had. It was the. Yeah, I was weird, but it was I I had no problem and I was laugh everybody else was pissed in first class. I was helping her out I get it. I get what she's going through people hated you Asole is assisting her they really didn't they they find this kid was Thousand dollars for a fucking ticket And there's a kid screaming there. I'd be pissed too, man. I didn't understand why she, like if I was, if it was me,

I would have went into coach and just bought him a seat. So your point is, if you didn't have kids, before you had kids, like you and no, you guys weren't tolerating it. It's like that Will Smith song. He wants to be, get the baby, the back city, wants everybody to drive slow now. Nobody ever heard that song?

No, but I, I don't know. I don't know. What heard that song. No, but I'm gonna play and sit by myself flying the Kansas City to do some show. And there's a couple in front of me making out for a long period of time. And I'm fat and I'm single. I'm gonna airplane. I'm not I don't really want to watch that. And then they have a kid who's like now playing with me and annoying me. So now that's not only am I being annoyed by the the love but I'm being annoyed by the product of their love Are you serious? Yeah, yeah, I think you're too self-conscious about being like a husky. I don't think girls care No, I was just I'm just making a joke

But you but you referred to like four or five times already like you know I'm gonna grow the like fat guys that kind of thing true. No, I don't think girls care I'd rather not discuss it, but yeah, that's where the joy I was making. I think I was just making a joke. I think, I think, I think, take your time. Take your time. No, I'm just laughing at him right now, just fucking me.

I think though, when somebody's in front of me with a kid back in the day, before I had a kid, I was pissed off, I was like, fuck me, I got better headphones, so I didn't have I was pissed off, I was like, fuck me, I got better headphones so I didn't have to deal with screaming shitty kids on a plane. It's just, it's one of the most annoying things ever. But now that I have a kid, I hear kids screaming, I start to smile. I'm like, I know what this person's going through.

Only time I don't like kids on a plane is when he's sitting directly behind me, or they kick the chair, doesn't bug me anymore that that bugs me because you can't it's like because it's unexpected. Yeah, but it's the only thing that bugs me and it never used to bug me. But the only thing that ever bugs your kids is when they're doing something that I know their parents could stop them like kicking the seat the parent can stop you but crying you know you have to be sympathetic because they're kids you know what are

you going to do? If it's a kid on your lap kicking the seat, you really can't, I mean you have to hold his legs, but that's what you should do. But then they flip the fuck out, but you just don't hold it. Then you hold them, and you deal with it, it's your kid. You see, you're raising them. Look at these three just she's out of the mic. You're staring at me like what the fuck. I'm listening. And dance face, I've never seen so stoke in my life.

Damn, I think Dan knows the most likely to want to have kids someday. Oh, I want to, I want kids. Dan, be good. Dan, I think Joe is going to have a bushel of kids. I'm not going to have any kids. I don't want kids. And you shouldn't have kids with that head.

You got to, that's C section all the way. You will fucking deathly create your love. Everybody knows, head size comes from the mom side. That's true. I don't know I know I can there's just a Big head again happen again over yeah, yeah, your mother got big head. I don't know what the guy He was just a new article out from unviced about how having children Descrates your happiness and your quality of life. I'm not.

I don't believe that at all. I didn't do the study, but vice-reported. I saw that. And the New York Times did a study as well. Well, it must be because a lot of people are having children that didn't want to have children by accident, or single moms who had a lot of stress, but a guy, a family that's happy and wants children, I think,

is like, well, no, isn't it married people? Married people with no kids are happy than married people with kids. Hold on, who's that talking? That's Chris Scupper. I didn't read No, it wasn't it married people. Married people with no kids are happy than married people. Who's that talking? I don't know, I didn't. That's Chris Scuapa. I didn't read the article. I just started my girlfriend read it.

I put Chris, that was far away from you guys as possible. It's a married people. I feel like a married people. Yeah, who have kids. Don't have kids are more happier than people who have kids. Maybe their relationship is happier. That's possible. I think having a kid makes you a happier human being.

Absolutely. Absolutely. You don't ask. Relationship is happier that's possible. I think be having a kid makes you a happier human being absolutely absolute you Don't ask Can I say this? No, can I say this? How are you up? What's going on? Are you are you moving the wire in some way Robert? I'm not touching anything but somebody touching something. Nope. This is the worst.

I think someone had to do it. I don't want the wires all over the fuck. Someone had to do a count. Are you good people? Yeah, we're still going. I think having a kid only matters if you have it with someone you really care about. Because there are tons of people have kids and they hate the girl or they hate the guy and then they don't get and the kid becomes an awful person. I think that if you're financially strong.

I know he's right. If you have a kid with someone you care about, first of all you are hard to get rid of it, then you want to get rid of her and then you have no feelings for this kid. But all the matters when you care about the girl and then you then you have a kick You have a different feeling. What the fuck? I'm gonna show you this man last time I was here was so much fun. Yeah, it's the it's the desk. It's the desk I think it's the desk and no I can't I can't tell fattos. It's you can tell fattos You can't tell the skinny guys. You don't get fat jokes

He's never been skinny in his life He's never fat in his life. I remember fat in his life. He's never fat in his life. I remember fat in his life. He's been this his whole life. He get eat as much as he wants. He's still just a little pot belly. The thing about gnome, he's been skinny, but then his restaurant is the best comic club food ever.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I don't know. I'm not saying much, but yeah. No, but you figured like, the stand has good food. The stand has. Yeah, but he's not too violent. The fucking cheat, cheat, steak, fucking, and bananas. Yeah, hamburger and, but it's not the fucking cheat. She's take fucking and bananas

Yeah, hammering but I was go man the wings here Okay, I mean the great leaves and not the leaves No, I don't forget the free Wi-Fi and wait and you could be here to two two three four o'clock in the morning Music you're fucking homeless, but I have a house I want to get to yeah, now you do but when you use a fat single fucking you was hanging out here with us Actually, you don't need what the funny girl. You don't care about girth if she's a pelts you You know six to seven in the morning You see how he fucking You let you let will

Doesn't matter I listen man. I of fucking it. I'm sorry. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Listen man, of course this place has the greatest food. I'm excited that they're going to change it up a little bit though. I mean, why don't you have the chips here? The homemade chips. It's just a burger, bro. So good. I have to ask Liz, because we need to do that in the underground first and then we never

thought to bring it over here. We're the friars in the olive tree kitchen are very busy. Here's what you do try to do. Can I give you a suggestion? Sure. You make the homemade chips here at the olive tree and you just like bread at another restaurant, you give a little tiny portion on every table for nothing and you get them to have just give them a little snack while they're waiting they get the drinks the food like a bread and

I don't know I mean I think and then be like can we have more of these yeah you can buy them for six bucks that's a good point that's a good idea that's crack that's how crack deal is what do you think about that we're making so much money now it's hard to get motivated about the chips no not about it's not a good idea you said that you said no we know you're not getting it it's a big uh... i got the pool money came from the selling of the wall uh... it's a big

Undertaking to put in a new item. I love that he just told us the truth I'm joking and he just said I sold the wall this while was only 70 grand to listen So are you going back the are you going to buy the why back with all the success? You're gonna buy the why back because there's a lot of success. You the comedy seller village underground a lot of success I don't want any magic making that place The comedy seller, Bill Jones, a lot of success. I don't want any. Imagine making that place a comedy seller. What would you like? Do you like the Villagena ground better for the comedy seller? Or would the actual Wabi an amazing comedy seller? That's a good question. The Waw is not as good as shape as the underground, but the Waw is a little ceilings are really low on the Waw. So the W walk can be pretty intense too.

They both be pretty good. I performed there though. They do comedy on Saturday. They always do. That's how you came into the comedy. So I hired you to be the MC on that Tuesday night. That was a great night too. That was a great music and comedy night.

Yeah, that's how Will got into the cellar. He's one of the only people who made an end around SD and run around SD. You really SD didn't let you in? No. Really? I brought you in? No. Really? I brought a willing. No. Really?

Ha! That's not really getting into the cello though, I mean. Yeah, but that's how it, that's how it, that's how it. You gotta kind of go through SD if you really want to get into the cello. Yeah, well. You gotta rub the right, yeah. You know what I mean? I mean, if you want to do it the right way.

I mean, if you want to use the, you know, whatever, whatever side. I did the dang cookware, the fans. God, and touch your hand. That's true. Uh, what do you call an SD, the industry? You call them. All right, well, it's actually recording again. How's that fuck? Yeah.

We're back online. Yeah, we're back online, except Bobby's Mike. Yeah. This is, this has been a very hard episode for me. So we did it though. You're going to say when is the new when is the new food coming in? So it means is this really interesting for the I'll tell him if you if I think it's interesting.

I think it's all the back of the back. The back of all the all of the tree where the bar goes with the bar goes in L. Yeah. I've never done it. That's very on the space. I'm going to move the back wall up to the front of where that back of the bar goes, where the bar goes in L. Yeah, I've never done it. That's very on the space. I'm going to move the back wall up to the front of where that back of the bar is. So that will give the kitchen enough room to have a second aisle.

And the comedian table, the end of the comedian table, then be flush with the back wall of the restaurant. It won't be an L-shaped bar anymore. And then because the kitchen is very, very small, they will have a real restaurant-sized kitchen kitchen so the bar is going to be smaller the bar or I may extend the bar further you know east but yeah the bar might end up being smaller because the Maguina doing real Barbies so what are you you're gonna you're gonna get away from the Middle East the food you're gonna keep that yeah I want to have a menu more like Blue Ribbon has you know get the fuck that's what I want. Yeah, so you're gonna have like an amazing restaurant blue ribbon type of I want really yeah, we'll still keep whatever milleys and items are you guys want wow

Well, you do we bring the schwama back no keep grape leaves. Yeah, what's some items? I want to see get great leaves because I do a vicious Bob You don't like schwama love schwama so fuck you guys to put the bananas in the shakes You can use to be able to talk with banana shakes I mean it's in bananas in there. Well. Yeah, you can have that Why does he get banana shakes he gets fucking read was I can't get swamma Swammer you need a whole special thing to cook it. It's a whole deal. I got a whole deal with two tables Now they got rid of that bananas are you know, all right? Hey, what kind of food from blue women will be there like?

I would love to have like us really good steaks and fried chicken and some pasta thing and the shroud salad. Oh, I can catch that. That's what he eats. Somebody's asking. I don't know if you see my pictures from this weekend. No, I can catch that trout for you. We know you didn't catch it.

I caught fucking two 18 inch rainbow trout. With that big head that big for a top rainbow trout 18 inches. I know. Yeah, that's huge. Look at that. That's one of my beautiful bitches. Look at that. Oh wow. At the provo. Provo pass around. Take the phone. Provo river. Do you have a way to put that on the video? Like my plug in your phone and this should be way to do that. Yeah, we're not going to do that today. I can't even keep the fucking thing going on the computer phone and the shipy way to do that yeah we we're not gonna do that today I can't even keep the fucking thing going on

the computer so I'm not gonna we have we have this computer over here that's a computer now crazy oh that one is when the yeah that love it you're like an old man and that person I went fishing on that river is unbelievable and the whole thing was that they the godfather too they they the gold phone the swipe it to the left the

claim that that that that that that's what Brad Pitt and they film the river runs through and then I was talking to the guy that goes no they film that in Montana they they film any of it go through his pictures come on let me see that don't go through my pictures you fuck i'm not even the fallback to get it yeah why the world is where you got these Don't go through my pictures you fuck Why do you have the phone back? Yeah, why do you have the wills of this? You got these side you cashy socks too?

He's got pictures of such You ever get your finger broken? Go through my pitch because my guy naked photos of here are my penis I don't want you to see that Really? No, I can't even see my dick I have to have a mirror and a friend to help me take pictures of him And a friend

What does the friend do? Hold the mirror. I'll live to stomach. I said, I was wondering what he was going to do. Good question. Good question. That's so weird.

That's like I just put a purse on you. He's easy. He's easy. Come on. This podcast is I just put a purse on you like it but he's easy. This podcast is what the cosy spinner or no. I outsource the serpent to the rainbow. I hold the stomach. I just picture.

Picture Joe this holding his stomach. I have been lifting weights. I let's go to the chat room real quick. There's been a bunch of jokes about how brightly lit Scopo is. Yeah, what? But he's not saying nothing. He's not Mike's really bad area for him. He's like in the back seat. Like're the backseat two guys on a friend seat You're not part of that conversation for your no backs. What's the jokes? Jules Frederick says he's the jokes Scopal looks like he looks like he's gonna sing Bohemian Rhapsody He looks like he needs new kidney That's good. They'd be really good today and the knife song says beam scopal up

You know, can I say something really on the last one? I've on Netflix, they have Star Trek. And I want to watch in the movies, one, two, three, four, and five. And then I went back and actually watch the, there's only three seasons of Star Trek. You know that? There's only three seasons of this show

that has fucking, I mean, just, I mean, decade after decade, just fans. I swear, I'm like, I gotta watch this fucking thing. Why is it three seasons and it's still around? It was, first of all, Captain Kirk is not in the pilot episode. Right. He is not the captain, it's just Spock.

Nobody else. Then they add- Wait, wait, just Spock for like an hour? No, Captain Pike. Captain Pike and Spock. nobody else then they add wait wait just for a long an hour no it was like captain pike and spot and then they captain Kirk rolls in this episode two but he's like he's been there they're even acknowledged it and he's kind of

just bust in balls on on no on McCoy on McCoy no McCoy wasn't any yet on the on the on the Scotty. Whoever the medical guy. Then Ohora. She's doing. She comes into sing. You want to get the black chik. You want to get do shivers. You want to get fucking do shivers. Watch the song that Ohora sings in episode two of Star Trek. It is the fucking worst. And the acting is, but it's such a really good show. I mean, they really do get you and keep you on the,

as you see, like, how are they gonna solve this problem? But the acting, everybody does that, Kirk acting in this movie. It's almost like the editing wasn't as good as editing is now, where they would, someone would say their line and the camera would just stay on them for like two seconds more, where they're just looking at the other person.

I don't know how they shot it or what they did, but it's really uncomfortable. And then they keep adding the people that we know. I'm at episode six, where who's the rushing kid what's his name check off they haven't had a check off yet but it's they added I think it comes season two so what's isn't it the check soo oh my god I know you know I know when I find out he was gay on Stern show I was like really but then was like, really? But then you watch the first Star Trek, you're like, this guy, I should have known this guy was gay.

Oh, okay. Oh my God. Jefferson's gay. I know way. Yeah. What? Why am I not listening? I know kidding me.

Google gay Sherman Hemsley. No, I don't know. I don't know. He's a straight Sherman. Like, he doesn't want to see how big your dig is. I don't want to see that. Apparently he's like a queen. Jefferson's gay. Yeah, not a queen, but he's gay

Not but I heard that he's like overtly, you know, uh, I you can't Boy, yeah, wow. That's what I'm gonna do. I'm busy. Yeah, really and Dave coolie also. No, Dave No from coolie guy. He did it a lot more so yeah But that's why I'm that's why he turned her down who's Dave Kooley uncle Joey from Dave rock Dave Are you kidding me? I am kidding you fucking asshole Cuz they're coming out with full house. They're coming back from I just watch you know a lifetime movie Oh, I'm hilarious. I'm great like great bad or great great horrific I mean it's a lifetime movie about and there's a guy playing John Stamos. He's wearing a wig and the

guy's actually pretty good and there's a guy playing the classic. The fans hate the movie. They're trash and they say it's a worst movie. Yeah, I mean, it probably has like a $300 budget. It's hilarious. It's great. I watch it. They just got, but they just got the whole cast back for the reunion.

The reunion. I thought the Olsen twins didn't do it or something. Oh, they're not doing it. Yeah. The whole cast except for the two biggest stars. Wow, they were, they were, they were, they were, they were the biggest stars of the show. Yeah, they were, they were a blew it up, yeah.

Yeah. Are they the ones that blew it up? They blew it up. I'm just going to keep asking you questions. Very bizarre. All right. This has been an awkward show. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm looking at this, it's failing. Usually when I can steer it and go, you guys, I appreciate it,

took over where I kind of was looking down and trying to figure this shit out, whatever. That's why I had you guys on, because I knew if someone were on you guys could fucking handle it and keep going. I hope you liked the new studio. I want you guys to, I really appreciate Nome and Tony. I want to get Tony and Liz up here and Tony's crew. I can't tell you. Tony is amazing. Trump is wrong.

I mean, the wrong is him saying that, first of all, Mexican people are the only people that help me in my life in the last two years. What do you mean your wife hasn't done anything? Didn't I build your studio for you? Yes, but you use Mexicans. Okay. Okay. Okay. They were there, they were the vehicles

from my generosity. Mexicans. Mexicans help you too. Unbelalble. Unbelalble, help Santa. You don't have to Santa the devil. That's how you want that nickname Santa? Owner of all.

I don't think Tony wants to know as an elf. You want owner of all or Santa? Whatever. Well Santa's not Jewish. I know that. He's white. Ah, anyways, yeah, I really, I'm, I'm whatever. Well Santa's not Jewish. I know that. He's white. Ah ha. Anyways yeah, I really, I'm, I'm,

he's an amazing studio, but we're still figuring out a lot of this stuff. The cameras, the, the audio, everything. So I got some ideas for this studio. All right good. I'm glad. Thank you for that. And then we're going to try to, no, I really am.

Okay. I mean, I'm not going to use any of them, but I'm glad that it's helping. Will it look good? It's stuff like that. Yeah, he's great. He is. No, he really is. I. I mean, I'm not going to use any of them, but I'm glad that it's seem helping. Well, it's good. It's stuff like that. Yeah, he is. He is. No, he really is. I know he's, let me tell you something. I knew that one used to live with Patrice, and he was editing movies together off of weird, I think the Miller came. I did the first Patrice O'Neill podcast in 2001. I have it too. Two episodes. You should probably play it on ridecast. He would like to hear that. would like to hear that you want to bring it in next time. I would love it

I'm bringing the potchita first episode ever 2000 2000 to a 2001. I would love that I would like to bring that in next time you come on all right But I appreciate guys coming in so let's let's we're gonna call this Well, let's go around the room and you tell me what you got and give us your Twitter handle anything you want to plug Well, what do you got will so Vince sell Vince, we'll sell Vince.com, W-I-L-1-L, and we'll S-Y-L-V-I-N-C-E. Next week I'm going to be Abu Dhabi, then I'm going to China. Did you say that right? I'm going to go to Abu Dhabi.

Because there's a country that has that name, so. Yeah. I'm going to make sure. We are now going to book them. And we happen to be in Abu Dhabi. September 4th comes to me. Also, I'll be in China. September 14th to the 21st.

How did you become worldly? Don't worry about all that. What about the cause of new chess? I don't have, you did the joke already. You did it, but now apparently it's getting laughs. Who's laughing? Who's laughing? No.

I think we're laughing that you just said it again. We're laughing. We'll still find us. Instagram Instagram Twitter Facebook everything and my new app coming out soon. Really? Yes. That's a translator. She can understand all of you. As a text messaging app that could do wonderful things. You're going to hear it my voice and go what I meant to say what Well, we're out of big head Okay, damn what do you get a punch that up? September 17 to the 19th I don't like daytime well either yeah, I think Every time those things. Yeah, these did almost carry. I like daytime well

Night time well. It's harder to see though Well laughing if you're listening at home at the sacrament of punchline 17 to the 19th of September the San Francisco punchline the week after love those last last time first week of October another great club then Bloomington

comedy addict the week after that and the bonfire on comedy central radio series this is a new show that big J and Dan soda have on serious what's the station channel 95 comedy central radio very funny very funny I've heard great shit about it I heard you guys a kick an ass fun and you guys have fun yeah time it all wherever a lot of fun that's awesome can you have guests on not yet but when we do we're gonna call you who who Bobby can't have guests on? Not yet, but when we do, we're gonna call you up. Who? Bobby. Can't have guests.

We don't wanna have guests for the first three to four months. Yeah, they just fly. I understand where you're saying. I get you. It's too established. It's part five. Yeah, I'm gonna start doing the same thing. Go ahead, Joe.

Ah. Ah. Ah. If you're listening live, I'll be on last coming standing tomorrow night. Oh, yeah. I'd be saying there's no voting. Did you get to watch, right? Did you win? I can't tell you, but. Oh, yeah. And we say there's no voting. Did you get to watch me?

Did you win? I can't tell you, but. Oh, no. He's here. But he's here today. Where are you? Yeah. I like the idea that this podcast couldn't get the winner of the last comic

stand at. I'm pretty sure you could. No, you're right. You could pull it off. And then October, half our Tommy Central Special airs October 24th. Hey, that's a big day. And then I'll be half our Tommy Central Special airs October 24th. Hey, that's a great day. And then I'll be at lap Austin the last weekend in October.

What a great club, Dan. What a great club. I really, you know, this, you guys should really go 50 West in Utah. It's a brand new club that I played last weekend. The owner is fucking unbelievable. Is he more? I don't know. I didn't get into that, but he probably, he, probably he might be but he is one of the greatest the staff is incredible the club is state of the art

i mean the whole back wall is our uh... uh... it's elli l uh... else elli dilley so they can put whatever they want behind and lcd and uh... lcd and it's they put whatever they want behind you sounds systems on unbelievable the room is unbelievable. And they have a restaurant attached to it, like a cafe type of bar. It is fucking phenomenal.

I told them about you guys too. LCD is liquid crystal display. And they have the camera set up. The, unbelievable, what'd you say? LCD is liquid crystal display and LED is light in million dials dial and you can't pronounce certain words or i could just do my credits what i'm doing there lcs is last comic standing that's uh... and they're c programs that's national broadcasting company so i

know i i told you guys you guys should have your agents calm up unbelievable club i fucking out of blast where's the love it's in you to saw like city you to fifty west brand new comedy club and it's fucking great the you know you know you know when you go to club and they they just treat you right and and and they just the nicest guy he's also the owner of it is also a spray paint artist and he called me and he's like what he texted me what it what superheroes do your kid like and i told him he gave me some of his original artwork of uh... certain superheroes from my kid to hang in the room and it's beautiful. Beautiful pieces with spray cans.

Spray cans. Yeah. Unbelievable. He might do something for the studio. He's actually going to take the logo of YK2D and make a beautiful piece of art for us. So I'm going to plug for you if you don't mind. Comedy seller which is on each side of the table and the Village Underground, I mean,

you guys know it's the hottest comedy club in the world. It's one of the best comedy, it's the best comedy club in the world. And now they have two locations, of course the original Comedy seller. And then around the corner, the Village Underground, Comedy seller, the Village Underground.

Where you shot, I shot my hour special, which was actually charted on the Billboard charts a couple of weeks ago and is going to Netflix in September, which is going to be huge. But it's, you know, it's just the best cut. It's funny because everybody knows about the club. Here so I know, because I would say in my act while I'm on the road, I go, I was playing another club, I don't want to mention the name, but it's in a basement and they all fucking died the whole crowd laughs because they know the comedy seller It's amazing. It is and I want to thank you guys, especially you know for hookin' this up. This is

And Liz and Tony listen Tony Absolutely, listen, you guys are all amazing to me. I mean you guys I love you guys because you make us all your part of your family You know, I think also I think because you make us all your part of your family. You know what I think? Also, I think the reason why is, because these guys care about, are passionate about comedy. They care about comedy, come for it's not the,

it's almost like business is second, and then but comedy, well let's not get carried away. This business is first, but it's right there. No, but you look at everything about other comedy clubs, they're throwing apart because they,

they think this is, you know, they do business, but then they step on the comedy part. No, this is a thing. It is business first, of course. Of course. But to not put comedy first, when you think you're concerned about your business

is just dumb. It's like having a restaurant and saying, well, I'm going to skimp on the food because it's business first. But that's what brings people in. So that's job brings people in. So that's job number one is to make sure the comedy is great. My favorite story about you guys is that I feel like you're very much like your dad.

When I first started hosting at the seller, I was able to get, like, pay my rent and move out of my parents' place. So I thanked your father for all the work and he goes, no, no, no, no. Never thank a club owner never He's right and he goes oh you are do good so the crowd comes back So we were in business together and I said okay because I was and the rest of the country does not the rest of the Comedie clubs I played did they do not feel that way? You know, I mean many many was with the the first guy to be like you don't have to

Take shit and you don't have to take shit and you don't have to. That's the clubs are like kill listeners. You guys are more valuable to the clubs than the clubs are to you. It's hard to find good comics. So, no, you shouldn't. Well, it's hard to find a club that cares about good comedy and we'll take the time to build up the fan base.

And then we also do, you guys treat us well, so that when we have opportunities on television or film or anything we can do, we promote your club worldwide. And that's the way it is, because it is like a family. His father said something very similar to me, but I told him, I go, well, you're still like my family. I was like, I get it, but

you still, I still care about you like that. So I want to thank you for the new studio. And we consider it the comedy seller, Ryan Cast Studio. It's amazing. And we're going to work out all the kinks. Let's go to Brian. What do you got, Brian? Doing Acme Comedy Company in Minneapolis, September 1 through 5th, Brad Garrett's comedy club MGM Grands, September 7th through 13th. I love that I heard another about a good stuff about it. Yeah, and comedy mix Vancouver Canada September 7th either 19th Then I'm doing I first show an anchorage chill Koo Charlie's every do chill Koo Charlie's I've been I've done a show an anchorage, but I it's a great the the friendliest people

Yeah, they're fucking me. Oh, you've been there. I've never met fucking people friendly than Anchorage, Alaska. Fairbanks. I mean, I think all the last kids just happier there. So amazing. You have a reindeer dog? No, what's that? They just go get a fucking,

it's a big sausage made out of reindeer. Ha ha ha. I mean, does an embassy pilot with tone, bell, and Mark Pogazzi, I'm in the first episode of that called people are talking i think that isn't on the end of august and you know she's uh... you know that'll be uh... masturbating ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Everybody's looking down. You're looking down. He was looking at his phone. I paid attention to that clip. You're looking at hip. Now you were, you're on your fucking phone. But disconnected from you. You can now get your own show.

You're all fucking. My hip hurts. All right, check it out. Of course, my show, Sex, Strikes, and Rock and Roll, which the ratings have been amazing. We broke records every week with the plus threes, and we just, we're told that it's, I think the number one rated freshman comedy series

out of all of them this year. That's great. I've watched all of them. Yeah, that's a loyal fan. Thank you buddy. Sex, drugs, and rock, roll, FX, 10 o'clock, every Thursday night. This Thursday, in every episode after this, is I'm I know

last week I wasn't with it, but this week I we start to do some really funny stuff. Me and my partner Johnny L's who plays rehab the bass player, we kind of get a sectioned off a little bit. And this week especially I can't like I won't let my grandmother watch this episode this week. I'm excited for that It's kind of fucked up, but the show's doing great everybody Elaine Hendrix Johnny L's of course John Corbett Dennis Leary and everybody that you know you Son of a bit I was going Liz Gilles who everybody oh my god Picking everybody now. Huh. She's what? Dan is single now. Dan single you single dad

I don't want you dating Liz you're not Never say that you would date me why you said you're cute. Yeah, but that's the she said you know She didn't she goes who's the guy with the head? Why is he back up with the girl? We're not gonna get into this from we're giving our plugs. No, we have time, go ahead. Uh, it just wasn't working out. What does that mean? I'm not gonna go into it, well.

See, that's, why did you bring it up? That's what happened before. Did she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, that's what happened before. I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, you should have heard no well can you stop it's and i'm given the fucking plugs i was kidding when i said we have time we don't have time alright f***ing

what's my plugs bobby will be in pumped in planes new jersey september fifth at the comedy shop and september twenty fourth through the twenty eight would be a just for last to run through i also have i have a very important, no, there's a very important benefit I'm doing next week, I believe, I want to do 30th.

It's not on your sky. September 30th, I'm doing a very important, Jesus Christ, it's in Jersey. Can I see the phone, buddy? Go to my Twitter feed and find that real quick. I'm doing a very important benefit for Hunter's disease. Have you heard of this? No. Hunter's the hits children. Oh, it's in Jersey. I'm going to be tweeting about it this week. So please, if you're in Jersey, I need you to go buy tickets and support this cause.

What's Hunter's disease? Yeah, I'm a 30th comedy night beef steak with Robert Kelly. Beef steak. To help benefit Justin. Jason and Justin Aledier. Yep. Are you sure it's only gay? No, it's these two kids who have this disease and it's a sad disease for kids and you can't, you know, you know, you kind of find out about around two and around there. You really can't know what it is.

What are your heart disease and what is it? I don't know the details. I just read about it when I, what's that? I got the, I want to call reserve tickets, 973, 470, 9300. It's at the three-sange cultural center. Yeah, it's, if you do some research on hunters, if you want to, I read about it the other day. I don't want to speak about it because I'm not,

I don't want to get it wrong. I don't want to get it wrong. I don't want to fuck me. So, but these two kids have it. And it's for Kidman, it's just, it's tragic shit. And, you know, so please, if you live in Jersey, buy takes to the show, support the cause and come down. We're gonna have a good time.

And also, I'm gonna be at just for laughs, JFL 42, which is in Toronto. They're not, they're promoting everybody but me. I don't know why. The JFL forty two Instagram has promoted every single except for me. I don't understand, I don't know, I don't know what's going. They promoted my, I'm doing a YK live YKWD up there. I don't know where it is. I don't know how to get tickets.

I would take it personally. Take it personally. Well, I don't understand it. It just doesn't make sense to me. I would imagine that sometimes these people get people who run the social media, who have favorites, okay? Which is cool, but you shouldn't have favorites. When you're running something, you understand?

Yeah. You shouldn't read, tweet somebody's show over and over and not everybody, but, you know, I'm a poster killer. I'm a fucking swag killer. And apparently I'm press killer. They're not really promoting me at all. So I'm just gonna go up and do what I do. I don't know where I am.

You buy one pass and you can go see all the shows. That's the way it works. promoting my me at all. So I'm just gonna go up and do what I do. I don't know where I am. You buy one pass and you can go see all the shows. That's the way it works. So I think that, you know, this is more about other people than me on this tour. I don't know. I just know that there's, yeah, I haven't been shown that much.

I'd be, which is weird for me with them. Cause I love you. You just called them up and asked them. I'd be, but just weird for me with them because I love you. You just called them up and asked me. We have and we've got no response. I love just for last. I love all the people Bruce and his wife and his family and Robbie and Zoe. They're the most amazing people ever. I love them.

I really do and I love doing just for last. It's just I don't know. People are asking me, how do I, where I don't know and I don't know. People are asking me, how do I, where I don't know. And I don't know. So I'm gonna go up there. If nobody shows up, then nobody shows up. But, you know, I think they kinda wanna promote these other shows.

Whatever. There you go. It's out there. I don't know. As soon as I know where the shows are, I'll let you know. I don't know if they know what they're doing with me. I have no idea.

All I know is that I'm like the bottom on the poster. I've been in this business 25 years. I'm literally on fucking two shows on FX this year. Two fucking shows. What's the other one? I was in train wreck. Oh, Louis. I was in fucking Nurse Jackie.

I was on Louis and then I'm on my own show on FX. What I'm saying. My name is 12 point fucking hell, Vedic around the bottom of a poster. I can't get a fucking Instagram. So there you go. And I just shut down everything with my fucking sorry. I don't know if that was it. Anyways, so I'll be a just for last 42 in September. If you like, I don't know where I'm going to be. But if you'd like to go to the

website, maybe I'm there somewhere buried somewhere down somewhere. But I'm going to be there. I'm a very excitable Toronto. I love it. Deep, what do you got? Little salad. If you're listening live, I'll be doing a show tonight at Hossley International at 930. August 30th, I'll be at Metz and Red Sox

so you can show up there and buy me a beer. And September 8th, I'll be engaged in roast battle with Chris Gopo. Oh man, we should record this. Yes we should. We got to record that. We're going to play that on the show. Let's promote the fun.

Where's roast battle? At the stand comedy club. Don't say that too loud. Oh, excuse me. Don't start doing fucking gimmick shows. What time is that show at the stand? I think it's 11 p.m. Right?

It's a late night. It's a beautiful club. Nice club. No cell. No cell. And that's not late night. Go ahead. It's a late night, right? It's a beautiful club. Nice club. No cell. No cell. And that's not late night. Go ahead. It's very cool. Oh, shit. Yo, you go late. Yeah, I love to stand. All those guys too. They're nice guys. I like those guys too. They're really great. Patrick, great. Go. What do you got, Scopo? September 3rd to 6th. I'll be back at Uncle Vinnie's. You can go check me out.

That's great. I think I might have a day for you too. I got a couple of dates coming up. Awesome. I'll be adding you to that that and then as soon as you get funny We'll be taking you to great. What when can we see you? I Think I'm visible I'm you when can I come see you whenever you want me? I mean next year I want to see I like to go to the Rose battle Why don't we all go that's all let's all that's all let's all fucking judge We have the empanadas. It's third this Thursday me gnome. What's that we can have the empanadas? Yeah, what's the date? What's the date? What's the date? What is it?

When is it September 8th September 8th? I think I'm around want to do it absolutely I will do it and I will judge with gnome if gnome judges I'm down. We don't want you to judge, but you'll go with you. Yeah Ah, I just want to w'm down. We don't want you to judge, but you'll go with you, yeah. Ha! I just don't want to wade through your mushy mouth. Oh. Oh, you really have a fucking something for this guy. He loves will.

I do love my will. I do love will. You know what, I love me. I love me some will. I love will too, you know that. I love you too, Will. I love you, Rob. All right, buddy, you guys are the best.

I'm sorry for all the fuck-ups today. I hope you guys like the new studio. We're actually going to start inviting some fans up that are in the city. The days that we record, we're going to start putting it out there. And if you send emails in, we're going to pick a couple people. And you get to come up and sit down here on these lovely couches and enjoy the show live from the studio. That's a great idea. Yeah, so.

You think it's a guitar YKWD podcast. Thanks for listening. Now go back to your shitty jobs. Check out riotcats.com for all the best podcasts on the internet. And they're all free. And they're all free. con Volotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca, espectacularismos, monumentos, rincones de película y un sincín de aventuras desesperan. ¡Fliparás!

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