Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - The Rat and The Bird | The Regz w/ Robert Kelly, Dan Soder, Luis J. Gomez and Joe List Ep #56

Episode Date: February 12, 2026

Robert Kelly, Luis J. Gomez, Joe List, and Dan Soder discuss the Super Bowl, Bad Bunny’s Half Time performance, TPUSA’s half time with Kid Rock, Luis’ new girl and how much Bobby loves her, Casa Bonita, how hard skiing is, the anti-jew commercial, Lindsey Vonn’s fall in the Winter Olympics, the frozen Hudson River, squashing the beef with Lemaire Lee, Danny and Robert Kelly filming a fight, and more! Presented by YKWD and GaS Digital. LISTEN ON APPLE PODCASTS https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-regz/id1700969607 SOCIALS Robert Kelly @ykwdpodcast https://robertkellylive.com/ https://www.instagram.com/robertkellylive/ Luis J. Gomez https://luisofskanks.com/ https://www.instagram.com/gomezcomedy/ https://twitter.com/luisjgomez Joe List https://twitter.com/JoeListComedy https://www.instagram.com/joelistcomedy/ Dan Soder https://www.dansoder.com/  https://www.instagram.com/dansoder/  SPONSORS  Rocket Money Get to Your Financial Goals http://RocketMoney.com/REGZ LucyGet 20% off first order w/ code “REGZ” BodyBrain Coffee Use code REGZ20 to get 20% off https://www.BodyBrainCoffee.com/ MASA ChipsGet 25% off your first order of MASA Chips with code REGZ @ https://MASACHIPS.com/REGZ QuinceFor free shipping on your order & 365-day returns go to https://www.Quince.com/REGZ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Fill her up. You're listening to the Gas Digital Network. Bobby of Arabia. Whoa. I was sitting on that. I thought it was good. You guys, come on. Lawrence of Arabia is a film, you fucking dorks.

I don't know. You're fashionable now. I didn't know if that was an inside scarf. It's a hoop, dude. I hate him and Jay and their fucking fashion. Oh, it makes me sick. Dude, I don't have fun. Old man, golf fashion.

Are we rolling? Huh? I think we're rolling for a half hour the way they fucking do it. What's up, everybody? everybody. We're back at the red show list. Dan's getting dressed in his mirror in the bathroom.

You are not a piece of shit. That's what the podcast. Lewis J. Gomez, me. Bobby K. Listen, dude. Bobby K, that's good. That's good. Finally, we have the new day.

Oh, that's good. You know, they don't have... Bobby KKK. Whoa. There we go. Bobby K, gay, gay. They don't do... Bobby, hey, I'm gay.

You know, they don't have nickn't have kids. Like, when we were growing up in Watson, everybody had a fucking nickname. They have nicknames. Boston, 100% of people have nicknamed. Everybody in Boston has a nickname. I bet you people named Robert today, kids are called Bobby, to this day. I don't think it's an old thing.

Yeah, are you talking about a nickname like Spatoon and like Hampton? Mine was Kelski. What was your nickname? Your nickname was what? Kelly. That wasn't a nickname. You beat me to it. Well, that was that great, Steve Sweeney had a great joke.

This is my impression of a Boston guy introducing his friends. He's like, this is Mickey, Stevie, big head, little head. No head, Sully, Sully, Sully, Sully. And the favorite part is No head. This guy with a nickname, No Head. That's funny. We had all, everybody had a, you never called anybody by their name. I think that's a Boston thing.

Is it? Yeah, you guys all have code words. Bobby, finish your food. There's food in your mouth. It's the worst. They're used to it. No, they hate it. I hate it.

It's not, you're not Brad Pitt. We all hate that. He always goes, they. He always fucking talks to the people. Shut up. No, it's one. It's one non-binary person. Also, if we got rid of.

Hey, they, go fuck your mother. If we stopped doing everything. thing they hate. This would be a Dan Soder solo show. That's not true. They like when I point guard him. What they like when they feed the head? A little marble in my mouth. I hate when people eat on podcast.

Well, there it is. Then you say, I don't like it. I'll do it for you. Look this up. I'm not doing for they. This is an actual condition where people that, if you this time... Dawn has it. It's monosophilosis. What does it say that again? Mienilophloviosis. It's mononucleosis. No, I know it is. has it. It's a real thing. She wants to kill me when she hears me, too. People fucking get grossed out by it,

and it's a large percentage of people. Yeah, but those people suck. Yeah, but there's also, there's a large percent of people that don't like the N-word either, but you fucking shout it on every podcast. Whoa. That's not true. I don't shout it. There it is right there. No, this is a contagious viral effect. No, fuckhead. It's the noise. It's caused by Epstein. Guys, why would you just look up, none on the list? Look up what the condition is. Who did that? It's Paco. 100%. Paco. Just fucking use your brain, dude. We're not looking at monocleosis. We're looking up the condition.

But if you just use your fingers, too. Let me finish. Hey. What if he just used his head to type it in? He's literal Paco. All right. That's right here. Listen.

It wasn't even a bomb we saw that Lewis was getting genuinely mad. Lewis, don't get mad, dude, don't let him fucking trigger you, bro. Yeah, dog. Don't do it. Don't do it. Damn, you get turned a dog. You threw such a nice party last night, dude. You had a real warm.

The fuck is this? What? I wouldn't have came. You wouldn't have come. You guys don't like me. What? I don't like you. I came.

First of all, I went to your house when no one else went. It was a bunch of fucking losers. I went to you. I brought my baby to your pool. I went to this house all the time. I call them Lewissers. What? It's good.

Instead of losers, losers. But this is Bobby's Big Beef with me, and he talks about how Colin said this to him. Bobby's Big Beef, great spot to get fucking roast beef. Bobby's Big Beef. I'm investing right now. I got fucking Lions mane and all my roast beef and Aquinasas. It's just the actual hair. And Muhammad Ali.

You're in my stage. There it is right there. Most misophonia. That's what you have. You're a misophony, you're fucking dumb fuck. Dude, that's fucked up. He had to add all these dumb fucks. You know what, Dan, go fuck you.

I have miso horny. I thought he's high-fiving me because I was reading correctly. Me so horny. Intense hatred or emotional, physiological, or behavioral aversion to specific, often quiet sounds with chewing being a primary trigger. So why wouldn't you just not do that? Because four people have it. You and two idiots.

Fuck them. And darn. You know what? It's like the people that say they're allergic to cilantro, but it just tastes like soap. Yeah. And when I worked at those comminos, people would be like, I'm definitely allergic to it. It's like, you're eating it right now. Yeah, it's like people with peanuts.

I'm still eating Snickers. Suck my dick. Well, that's, they could die. I bring nuts on planes. Snicket, please. What? Snickers, please. I stepped.

We both stepped on our shitty ones. We got to slow down. Bobby's jacked up. Bobby's very jacked up right now. I'm not fucking jacked up. You're not listening. You're not. Chewing. It's because you have you have chew sounds in your ears, so you're not listening to anyone talk right now.

Right? Yeah. That's his normal white noise. Hey. New nickname. Chewbacca. Bobby. Bobby. We were. Shout it out. What's the sound, Dan? That's a better one. I think I even proved my helicopter, by the way. That's a good elephant. Hey, I'm really offended that you compared my fashion shit to Jay.

Let me tell you something. No, you started hanging out with Jay. You started dressing like a fashionable fission. And you voted for a fashion. His glasses. The fucking, you're bracelets, your fucking this. I have your scarf. scarf. You have what? It's a hoop. It's not a scarf. Get it right. It's a hoop.

What shoes do you have? Is my fucking Kizzyx? The slipons. Are those, probably it stinks. These are Kizeks. Are you doing the ones where you don't have to bend over now? Yeah. Are those the dude? Don't bend over shoes? Don't use a fucking 10 years. We all just like, dude. I wish they sponsored me instead of fucking pillow cube. They go, he can't see his feet. He's got to slide into these things. I went to see Jay at Lovity Live. And we went into Hot Topics and I bought him pink, fingerless mittens I know, it sucks. And he wore them on stage.

And he's worn them since. And I've got to say, they pop. They pop on stage. You guys are 50-year-old men. It's ridiculous. Well, we all got to dress like fucking merchant marines like you. Dude, whatever. Let's have some fun in life.

Yeah, you look at the matter. I like the alliteration, but it didn't make sense. I like no alliteration. Yeah, merchant marine, they wear like a hat. Yeah, they look like the fucking scrub. When we got to the club. Jesus, that was what the club. You think you were.

Me chewing. Hold on. That's like if chewing food was a person. He was just like, blah, la, la, da, that's Get out of your Mucinex monster. I took mine this morning. Oh, my God, do. Can somebody put that thing in a tissue? He was going to be in the hotel endeavor this weekend every morning. He caught, on stage, coughed into his fucking crease in his elbow. Oh. I almost threw up. Oh, you're a little flump parrot?

Raise your hand. Go ahead, Danny. What are you got? He can be parched in. Did you tell Paco what you want to say in his ear and have Paco say it to us? Sweetly. Paco already knows it so he can do it. I am a Jew and I interrupt podcast.

Sorry, I have a bagel breath. From I'm not eating too much cream cheese. Oh, my God. Oh, look at this, a shiny penny. Oh, wait, I'll just stop that car. I need to grab that cord. Point guard. No, you were the motherfucker.

You're Larry Berry. burden that kid. Swish. Go ahead. What do you got? When we got to the club, this. Swallow!

Clear your throat. For the, dude, just, what are he shoing on? Fucking ham. Just clear your throat. God damn.

Is your mucus caramel? Did you just drink a milkshake? Are you bleeding from the throat? He's out of those big ones that has like swirls in it. He's got a piece of cake of the top. Fuck me, dude. I would never speak if I had that voice.

Let's let's give him one more shot. Danny, go ahead. When we got the club. Is your tongue dead? Dude, your voice is like a puddle in a parking lot. I feel like I'm stipping in a puddle out of my car. You sound like a wet shoe.

Oh, God, no, let's go. Dan, you got it. Clear throw, you got it, go ahead. When we got to the club on Thursday, the staff did not recognize Bob because he was wearing too many scarfs and hats. He was Lenny Kravitz's up. No, it's because last time I was there was heavier.

Yeah. and they didn't recognize. It was a year ago. Yeah, I was heavy a year ago. No, yeah, they didn't recognize. Look it, I like glasses, you know that, and I like a hoop in the winter. Yeah.

But I'm dressed in a, I don't wear mittens. I don't have a chain to nowhere. I don't have a scarf hanging off. It's the same shit. It's not called an album, a chain to nowhere. Chained in nowhere is good. That's what I called it. I said it's a chain to nowhere.

It's great. There's no wallet. And now everybody's wearing it. Everybody has the chain to nowhere. The Super Bowl, all these fucking dudes had the chain. At the halftime show, we all this chained to nowhere. It's a racist turn for Bobby. Yeah, Jay Jess is like a chingling.

It's funny that we're like, Bobby, why are you dressed like that? And you're wearing like a cheapo free dojo hoodie with the letters all. It's the glasses. It's the way it's been coming in. Listen, here's the thing. When you accessorize it's fucking... I need glasses, and I don't want to get fucking reading glasses like some fucking fly fisherman. What is that?

You are a... These are prescription? He's a prescription? Also, Bobby, if somebody gets prescription sunglasses with shade, that's fucking off. Awesome, I said. No, you're not a fucking Jew. Dude, you named yourself a rattlesnake. Shut the fuck up.

Exactly. You're a fly fisherman. Yes, I am. And when I go fly fishing, I have those glasses. I do not wear this. These are my Jacques-Marie's. And I like that. They are, this is pit boss at a casino look.

No, but you also wear a bag like Jay wears, like a designer backstrap bag. I don't know if it's called the fias bag. It stinks. Yeah, he's got a louis bag. Yeah, well, listen, I'm a bag slug. You're not a fission. Sue me. Sue me for being a bag.

bag sluts. Sorry, he loves to be strapped. You smoked fucking weed, man. Yeah, you do. I haven't smoked weeds since Christmas. I, you'll smoke again. Maybe one day. Shut the fuck up.

I don't know. What does it have to do? I don't know. What does it have to do? I was just trying to think of me. Is there my other things? Your dad's dad. Your dad got stabbed.

What? There was a brief moment where Bobby was going to pile on and then he realized he said it. You're like, yeah, what does that have to? Oh, fuck. It really was. I was like, what the fuck does that mean? You fucking.

Wait, did I spend that? You fucking ass. Oh, fuck. shit. We had a first time, Bobby came over with the Super Bowl. It was fun. What the fuck? Can I say something? What the fuck? I want to have a... You wouldn't have come. I have a problem. But that's your big pet peeve, Bobby.

What? You get the advice. There's five people in your life, blah, blah, blah. That get the invite. Even though you're not coming, like if I'm doing a party, I'm inviting all of you guys first because I... There's no way that... And I know you'll come. You're going to say no, maybe. You're definitely not coming.

Colin's not coming. I invite calling everything. But you're still calling him. But you were calling him. Dammit. Beat you. You guys are toe to toe, though. You're just right there, though.

Yeah, but you get the invite. You always got to say the invite. Let me say this. It wasn't a true party. It was... Bobby was there? No. I'm sorry.

I've been on your side, too. I know. You're a piece. No. Come on. No. Come on. I've been picking up for you.

I'm defending your shirt and you closed. So it wasn't a true party. Initially... Whoever let's go is gay. Initially, I invited Big J just to watch the Super Bowl. That was it, right? And then I was, it wasn't even a party.

I invited Big J to watch Super Bowl. Christine came. Then Big Jays said, oh, can I invite Josh Adam Myers? Which is crazy. Is he going to sing the Super Bowl to you? Maybe. That got it. That ball.

It was close. Very close to that. Yeah. So my. Bobby, what do you think? Paul sells. Shut up. Dude.

My, my chick was there. my son was there. It wasn't a party. Keep going. So then... You had a couple wild cards. Who are the wild cards? He threw in wild cards, which is fucking against the rules.

When someone says, hey, who's going to be there? You got to give the list. I'm making my decision on who's going to be there. And when he says, who's going to be there? Besides his family, I've named everybody. No, you didn't. You didn't say Josh. I said Josh.

Not to me. You didn't. You said Big J. and Christine. And your girlfriend and James. And I'm going to bring my wife. Because, first of all, if I'm bringing my wife... You're just mad about Josh. It's not wild cards.

When I'm bringing my, when you bring in your girl, you got an, I can deal with a wild card. I'm not putting my family into a wild card. You understand me? Let me finish. I know exactly what you're talking about. You know, I don't want to have to, I don't know your girlfriend's name and I don't want to have to introduce. I got to go meet his girl for the first time. So that's a big deal to me because the last one.

Before you get into it, hold on. Let me just fucking see. Okay, I'm going to. Are you going to Adderall today? What's going on with you? You're fucking. I'm just having a good time. Why don't you leave me alone?

I'm on my body. It's my body brand. With Lewis pulled you aside. I goes, hey, what's going on at home? You're being crazier than me today. And I don't like it. I'm the bark. You're the bike.

What are you doing right now? You make me look like an asshole. I like this, Bobby. I love it. He's through the wall right now. I'm just saying that yesterday you had some wild. Stop patting me. Let me finish.

Stop that because it works. Because I didn't even finish who I invited, right? So, no, Jay invited Josh, Asked if Josh was okay. You didn't tell me. Didn't tell you. No, you said, I said,

we talked for whatever reason. I said, oh, what are you doing for the Super Bowl? You said, oh, Max was going to have some friends over. No, you texted me, and I texted you back something mean, and before you lost your mind

reading my tone wrong, we were like, fuck you. I called you, and go, dude, before you read the tone wrong, I was just a joke. And he was like, oh, it was funny. And then we talked, very nice conversation.

He goes, dude, come by, and I love going to Lewis's house. Yeah. Because I love James and Max. Yeah. They are fucking, I wish they left right next door. Because they, that's the friend I want.

Took the conversation for me. This is what you did in this whole book. He's like, I got a ball, and he grabs it. Hey, dude, what are he? I'm sorry, is there, is there rules? Rules to podcasting? No rules. No rules.

So, shut up. No topics. Just comics. Busting Paul. So here's a thing. We talked to each other. We talked on the, no, because you're telling your version. I'm telling the true version.

And they're every one. They need context. You said, I said, who's going to be there? Big J. Christine. my girl James, it's going to be a great time but I'll hang out. Great. Not a party though. Would you call that a party? Yes, it's a party. It's a hang. It's a hang. But it is the Super Bowl because

it's an event. And my team is in. Jay lives in Jersey 15 minutes for me. That's why I invited Jay, right? He didn't have any plans with the Super Bowl. It was simple as that. That when I spoke to you on the phone, I was like, oh, if you're not coming, bring come back. Because he said he was going to go to the cellar with Max to watch the ball. Instead of doing that, just come over with Max that'd be a lot of fun. I was excited about

So that became like a bigger hang. This is why you guys weren't invited because it was never a far-reaching. His team was in it. My fiancee's team was in it. She wanted to watch it at home. So, yeah, I totally get it. Yeah, yeah.

So anyway, the point was I wasn't fucking not inviting you, my friend. So now you can talk shit about my ex-girlfriend. Okay, no. First of all, boo to her. No, she's a good chick. She's fine. Last time... I like all of them.

No, she's fine. But last time I met his girlfriend, and it was a fucking, it wasn't good. Sure. First time I met it. She had anxiety. Because she's... I got anxiety.

You got, we all have fucking anxiety. Yeah, but she's just like a... She's not a chihuahua. She's an 11. What anxiety is she... Here's a problem with hot chicks. Oh my God, I'm smoking hot. I don't want to be around regular people.

She's never had to really... His wife has small tits. Oh, what do I talk about recipes? His wife is a little chubby. What do I talk to her about meatlove? She's never... Because she's the hot chick and she's like kind of like has social anxiety.

She's never had it really regulated. It just kind of comes off like a bitch. She's always doing this. She wasn't a bitch at all. I wouldn't call her a bitch. Slow down. Slow down. Slow down.

Let me finish my statement. Before you just, she's not a bitch. She's not a bitch. She's not a bitch. Listen. Because this is what he does. This is what he does. He says shit and we fucking let him get away with it.

I never called her a bitch. I didn't say she's a bitch, Bobby. I didn't say you called her a bitch, bro. I said she comes off like a bitch. Listen. She's not a bitch. You're just going. Yes.

I'm going. Relax. I'm not relaxing. you tell me to do. Listen, Dan, here's what it's the first time. It's an insane way to podcast. The first time. You've said a thousand words to everyone else's too. The first time we fucking met, they pull up at my house.

I'm excited. My whole family comes out and Lewis. I'm going to go. I can't do this. He's like, my wife comes out. Let him do the bitch. Like this. I mean, okay.

Okay. That is funny. Get a still. You get a still. That's good. That is. In the car? Like that? In the car like this?

Come on. She didn't, hold on. She wore slippers. She didn't get out of the car because, and she wore slippers on purpose and not have to get out of the car because I was picking up James. The whole family didn't come out. Bobby came out. Don was there. No, John was there.

You said, come out of the car. Please, don't call. Please, Bobby. I'll call it. I'll call it right now. I got two cousins. No, no, don't call her. But she was there.

We don't need. She was there. She was there. She was there. She was there. I haven't loved it. I haven't loving it. Admit Dawn was there.

Sure, Don was there, dude. Thank you. She was there. She was 100% there. Because Don't actually... I'm going to put this in the file. When Don came in... Whenever you're ready for anyone else to podcast, let me know.

All right, not yet. Listen, the thing is... The thing is, I'll fucking do the whole show. Zip it. He hangs out Big J too much. This is what they fucking do. That's the second time you fucking said that about me. You're becoming Big J right now, dude.

Listen to your friends. I have never enjoyed Big J as much. How many asshole photos do you have in your phone? Six. That was a great. I missed that. He said, I've never enjoyed Big J.

James. So, they talk. They don't listen at all. It's crazy. I know. I built it. Don't start.

I built that style. You with these people for as long as you. I helped create the playbook. I was so fucking annoying doing the bonfire with them. Remember that? Oh my God.

He's just, he's thinking about the next thing he's going to say like three. He had the best joke at the roast. He was like, Big J. And Soter invite you on the bonfire to see if you can get a word in in two hours.

I said you should have a radio contest. Free concert tickets. Anyone that can get a word in this show. Thank you. Joe Listroes coming up, Skankfest. Woo! It's going to be fun. So Don is there. Oh, Don is there. Oh. What? Big? Is Apollo out?

Because of the, you know what? No, but somebody that we want to be in as a tentative yes. Matt right. Surprise. Somebody who will not associate publicly in any written form of St. Oh, I think I kind of know who this might be and we'll talk about it after the show. How big is it? It's big. Like huge, huge.

I mean, the biggest comic in the world. Go Rogan. No, I don't think Joe's a bigger comic technically. Joe's more famous. But as a stand-up comedian, Dave Chappelle. All right, you know, it's not the biggest comic in the world, but he's up there. I don't even want to talk about Joe Liz. I want to talk about trans people.

So, anyways, he was talking to Don. Dude, you should do the entire Joe Liss Rose as Dave Chappelle. I've never even seen Joe Liss' stand-up comedy. Blackfield. I thought he was a bum. with glasses on for the first six times I met him. I said, who put glasses on a bird? That's the funniest thing I've ever seen in my life.

It's next year, Dan. Jesus. It's a greatest. That's such a good Dave joke. Oh, wow, that's good. Dude, your entire roast should be different characters. Dude, roasting Joe, it says you go to macho man? It hurts my throat.

No, it's so funny, dude. This is a brilliant way to get soda off the roast. How do you like a doggy? Nailed him. That's good. Listen. There's a divide here. I love it.

Can I say right now? The divide was made by you. I came in here and was so mad at Danny who did not deserve it. Right. And then immediately Bobby did the thing where he goes, he'd go in the circle and I went,

sonful pitch on me. We were stuck in a Dan Loop. Yeah, you're stuck in a Dan Loop. Dan Loop's enough fun. Yeah, yeah. Dan Hill just keep on going. He goes up and then comes back down. Yeah, I go.

You just skin. All you got to do is like, do this with your hand. I'm out of the Lewis loop. Yeah, but all Bobby, Bobby's got to say a word where he's like, Excelsio. You know, like, cut's all. So he was talking to Don.

Yeah, and she was just in the car. I just saw her sitting there. And I gave her time to come out. I did to where it was like, maybe she was on the phone, texted something. She was just staying in the car. She wasn't coming out of the car. She didn't want to meet your shitty family.

Exactly. I hate them. Have you seen the video of the dog looking back and in the window going up? She should have hit Bobby with that. It was wild. And I walked over. I go, roll the window. Get out of the car.

Meet my family. He goes, get off your TikTok. James literally quotes this probably twice a week. He's like, you remember when Bobby told Jenny to get off her TikTok? It was the best. That's so funny. Get off you TikTok. She was scrolling social media.

My fucking wife is right there. You're knocking with a bag light. This is one of my closest friends in my life. You're going to be invited to a lot of things. And if you're going to be, this is your first. Impressions are important. Exactly. But I tell you what, I was a little nervous about being the new one because she's smoking hot too.

Lewis has a type. A little nervous bringing my wife and my son over there. Oh, this is so. Especially Max, because he's going to fucking go jerk off in the bathroom. He's going to awuga her, the first thing he sees her. He wore a bowtie just so it starts spinning. Slide whistle. Max, leave the slide whistle at home.

I didn't want to like the bowtie, but when he did the act out, I got it. It was great immediately. Nobody was talking about. First impressions are important Dance first impression Macho man Was it your first one? No

Who was the first one you nailed Right? That was good Come on That was great I liked it We had a show at SkangFitz called First Impressions

Where everyone had to do impressions A poo from Simpsons Ooh It's just an Indian accent Fucking Yeah But a six-reau I smell like shit

Nope A poo I smell like poo So first impression Of the new one Yeah You want it? Yeah

Oh boy Dog comes running out Brand new adorable dog. Yeah. Comes running out. That was the girl. That was good.

Lewis goes, dude, dude, stay there because she'll pee. And I get it. I had a dog. They always pee when they get excited. Sure. Dog. Fucking great dog, by the way. God damn it.

She was the star of the show. Wanted to steal this fucking dog. Peas right there. Pittles. We know, whatever. Yeah. Piss pop is what we called it. Girlfriend right there with the spray and the thing. Foo, foo, foo, foe, on her knees, smoking hot chick.

Hi. this is the energy. Hi, nice. Oh, I'll get it. And she's right there. Cleaned it up. Got up. Hi to my wife. Said hi to Dawn first, which is what you should do. Don't say how to me. You go to the feet. Well, she didn't know who you were. Right? Yeah. Much because I look good. She was like the staff at the comedy works. So I tell you right there. Why are you wearing so many scarves? Right there. No scarf yet. And it's a hoop. And it's a hoop. I don't wear scarves. That's gay. Hoops are cool. She, right down, I was like, you got me right now. Yeah. All you got to do is keep this up.

Just keep this up. Just keep cleaning up. Keep cleaning up and stay in the kitchen. Don't talk to me. Good? She was great. She's cool. She's fucking.

She was, I am excited. And it's funny, too, because she got caught in the middle of something with my wife. Uh-oh. You know, Dawn's a funny. This is so fucking funny. Triple kiss. So, I don't know. I'm watching.

I'm kind of. I'm kind of watching the game and I'm kind of late Like everyone's having conversations You go, it's just, it's just shapes moving I don't understand what's happening I don't know anything about football But so they're all kind of talking The dogs are kind of a big part of the conversation

Because there's a cute little puppy running around Everyone's playing with the puppy Fun like really good energy Everyone's having a fun time So I don't really, I'm just peripherally kind of listening I don't even know what's going on I just hear my chick going like They're talking about dog breeds

And she's just like She goes She was like, yeah, I mean, like, I love dogs. She was like, but she was like, you know, she's like, you know what like the worst behaved dogs are? She's like, doodles. Like, those are like just the worst. So every time I meet a doodle, it's just like all over the place. And then I watched Dawn look up and she goes, we have a doodle.

That's great. And in Don's accent? We have a doodle. During a Patriots game where it wasn't going well. They go, hey, we got a doodle. You got an opinion on Belichette, not getting to the Hall of Fame either? What else you got? Fucking hot take over there, huh?

And then why did my girl have to stutter her way out of it for five minutes? Just over explaining way too much for five full minutes. Oh, it was great. I will tell you now that I have full evidence. And obviously, these two are from Massachusetts. A woman from Massachusetts goes to conflict. Yeah. They don't avoid it.

They go like, what did you say? Oh, fuck. When we were at MSG with Shane, Aaron Judge was there, and Katie walked, when it was me and you and James, Katie walks like B-line, and I go, oh, whoa, whoa, whoa. When I stop her, I go, where are you going? And she goes, to sit next to Dave Attell. I thought you're going to go talk shit to Aaron Judge about the Yankees.

And she was like, no, but now I'm thinking about it. I was like, God damn it. I was not, when I first, I was not prepared for Katie. Yeah. Katie's like, Dawn and all the friends. That's what I mean? I was prepared. She's like, why are you gay?

Yeah, I was prepared for, like, Lewis's girl just to be on the phone. And she's like, what are you doing? You don't know anything about football, you fucking queer? Huh? I just went into myself. I was like, I'm going to call Dan's chick a fucking doucheback. I can't do it. No, you do it right now.

No, I love her now. But, dude, here's the thing I brought. I stopped at the 7-Eleven and I got, because, you know, she's younger than him. Sure. You got her a ring pop. I got her a ring pop. I swear to God, I brought her a ring pop.

No, you did. What? I swear to God, you just guessed that? He brought her a ring pop. Crazy. Absolutely. Just guessed that. I go, what did you get it for the child?

I got a ring pop. I got some candy. I go, here's some candy. I got this for you. It was great. She was like, Thanks. Oh my God.

Because you wanted to watch your suck on it? Huh? Because you wanted to see her son? No, just because she was young. Oh. But that. Joe puts it on her finger. He goes, give it a taste.

Does that. Do you mind if I watch? But he, you did. The party was great, but here's it. I came in too hot, too. I have a tendency sometimes to come in a place. Not today, though. No, today you were cool.

You're like a jazz musician today. I like this. You've evened out. Oh, I'm glad I fucking. It's bad. Oh, I'm glad the podcast came. This is like, I mean, I'm a podcast. I'm a podcast.

I mean, I am a point-guard of podcasting. I'm pretty, you know, I see. Well, just do it in your head. I can remove my head. I sometimes float above the podcast and watch us. And I'm, I don't need the last dance interview for your podcasting. So the thing that, I did come in hot and I feel bad for it. Because when I came in, there was two people that weren't on the list.

One. Two. Who's the other one? It was the two dudes. Oh, oh, oh, yeah. The Maddie Jester Skulls. Oh, fuck. I haven't seen him in forever.

Hard, like, good for. was on gas digital for a while was it started off as a fan. He's the man. He's the fucking man. And then my Beatrice's nephew, I call him my nephew. He's not actually my nephew. But he's related to James. We're up to three people then.

I just realized there's three people. And Josh is singing in everyone's intro. Josh is, yeah, Josh came in a little late, which was another thing. But when I came in, I did come in a little hot with those two dudes. Both good guys. I felt bad because Beatrice's nephew.

I took a nice photo. the group shot on the top, but I think I, I didn't see him over in the chair. And I went, and I didn't, I didn't know if he cared, but I went out. Hey, did I not get you in that? He goes, no. And I go, hey, let's take a selfie me and you. And he went, thank you.

And I was like, oh, shit. Very, very nice kid. How old? He's 20. I don't know. He looked like a man boy. He's turning 24 next month. Yeah.

But I didn't know them. That fucking. They were my girlfriend at the same age. You're serious? That's how you guys were going. Oh, I thought he was like 10. No. No, he's a.

But that threw me a little bit. We got over everything quick. He's got, the couch he has is perfect for a wild card. Because, you know, there was enough places. Sexual? Like, when you go to Jay's house, I went last year for his Super Bowl. You have to stare at Josh with this costume. Worst part, Josh ran in and just grabbed.

My chair. He did that. He went, this is my seat. I know, I was there. Yeah, it was terrible. This is where I sit. And he brought his dog. His well-behaved dog, that's not.

Which was very funny because Jay was talking about these stuffed olives the whole stuff peppers the stuff peppers jay's like phanoia brings these stuffed peppers from connecticut they're fantastic and they were they were fantastic and we ate a couple and then k where katie and i were sitting was like in front of it and then josh's dog just comes over and starts licking the pepper juice and we went well we're too far away and then jay comes over and he's like how great are these peppers and he goes we got josh's dog lick that and he was like he's like mad at real time he's like well people who bring their dogs like, just you can't.

You can't do it in a way game. You can't do it. You can't really bring your, I don't know. Or drug them. People who bring their dogs just in general. I got a cute little dog. I'm never bringing my dog to people's places. No, bring up to my place.

I mean, for like a play date. I love you. Yeah, you love the dog too. Yeah, we bring his nibbling your chin. She can bite me. She bit my nose like three times and I loved it. You're talking about Lewis's girlfriend? Yeah.

Care about them nibble in your chin. One bit mine right off when I was a kid. Finally, you come clean about where it went. No, his girl fucking, and here's how she ended the night. She opened up with a fucking banger, and then she closed. She goes, Bobby, here, wrapped up sandwiches, leftovers, you have to take these. And I was like, I don't, she goes, you're taking them. And I was like, you know me.

She's got, she's got a, she slips into a Philly accent, too. So she's very pretty, but then she fucking just, the accent will come out. You're like, oh, you're garbage. Yeah, you're a fucking problem. I know you used to be a fat piece of shit. Exactly. Yeah, take these head you. You're fatty shit.

It's so funny. She gave everybody a tray to go home, which is, dude, it's not, she's, how long you've been dating? Since Thanksgiving. Okay, so it's not that long. No. But she makes you feel like it's her place. She did the things that he should do that he would have did, but she took over. I would literally, my house would be covered in food right now, still, if I didn't have a chick to help.

It was great. She's auditioning to get wiped up, I could tell. I mean, dude. Do you think your ex is going to look? listen to this episode of the podcast doing knuckle push-ups, being like, oh, it's going fucking great, huh? Sorry, Bobby, I didn't get out of the car.

She's going to stop babysitting so she can stand kids. Yeah, she goes, do it again. I made a mess. Again. I made a mess. Again. I think the misogyny in this episode's really a little off-putting. What do you want to do?

Put a strap on and peg you? I wasn't talking about you, Dan. I don't know why you're coming at me so hard. But Bobby only likes her because she was cleaning up and then giving out leftovers. And she's sexy. And you know That's it

And she voted for Trump And she voted for Trump And she did she? Yeah Fucking come in her Come in her I do A 24 year old girl

Voted for Trump Yeah She's got a problem Buddy I love her She said I love the rhetoric You can bring her over She's from Philly

She goes Yeah it's hilarious You guys can have The tiny house if you want I'd let you guys go up there Yeah Because he's got Ring cameras all over it

Yeah God damn right Yeah She's got three different angles Um Yeah the other dude the dude that's doing the electrical work in your house. He was a good guy.

There's another guy? That's more. That was mad. What are you? A sitcom or people walking in? I came in too hot with him, though, because I didn't know him. I go, who the fuck are you? You've met him probably at least a dozen times.

And I came in too hot. And then after, and I was like, I don't like you already. I just came in hot, joking around. But I felt bad because he was a great guy. The other kid was awesome. Yeah, and Josh was singing. Joe Josh. I had to tell Josh to shut up.

He wasn't joshing me. He was microjohn. joshing me in the middle of the game. Takes a microjosh? Yeah, microj where it's like I'm in the middle of the game. We're going to pass the ball. Bobby, let me ask you a question. So this is why I didn't go to Big Jays when the 49ers played the Eagles in the NFC championship game because I told him specifically, Justin Silver or Josh Adam Myers are going to ask me questions. It's going to make me want to fight everyone in the room.

They have nothing to do with what the fuck is going on. You're like watching the game and then Josh leaning to go. Pretty intense moment. Yeah. So in 1988, do you think that the Cincinnati Bengals? didn't get far enough. There's a boomer of a science. If you would.

You know, what is this? And then you go to answer and he goes, Jay, I was just talking to Rob Zombie. Yeah. He would like ask us at Jay's question. He would ask me and Katie a question about football. We'd go to answer and you go,

Jay, did I tell you Scott Weilin's underwear for sale on eBay? And you're like, this is so fucking on what he was doing that. I was like, dude, I don't want to talk to you. I literally told him to shut the fuck up yesterday. I can't. Look, I love Josh.

I love him. Just the man. But he does that. little thing, little micro-joshes that my personality, I can't fucking do it. I can't do it. Meanwhile Lewis's geisha is waiting on you, or she's like,

Mr. Bobby, she was great. I looked over at one point, my girl was in front of me between my legs. I was holding her. His girl was in front of him on the couch. And I looked over, and Josh was between Christine and Jay. Jay, do you want me to sing,

though? All right, guys, let's take a quick moment and thank Body Brain Coffee for being a long-time supporter of the regs. Thank you, Body Brain. Not that long. Bobby, I call Bobby-Bobbyn from now on. I have it every day on Bonfire. I know you do, and I love you.

And I really love you. People, Bobfire. People love it. It really is a great coffee. I created this coffee about a year ago, but it's not just coffee. It's premium freezer-od Colombian coffee that tastes great, but it's also blended with neutropics and adaptogens

that will make you feel absolutely great. Tonka-A-li is sort of our secret superstar ingredient, which has been linked to healthy testosterone levels in men, especially aging men, also got Lionsman, which helps with memory and focus. Ashwaganda, which helps with mood, which Dan needs in Ashbergonda right now. No, dude, you need to pump the brakes, brother. You're talking so fast like I pulled you over.

You're like, Ashkawanda, and I wasn't going that fast, and I didn't see that stops on back there. I got to get this out before we tell him he can't do him. He sees us going like, why are we letting him? Why are we letting him do this? Ashkawandah, please just kick. I created myself in a laboratory. Please buy it.

Jay's already on my house of moscanks. I got to have a season. And Lthianine, which smooths out the caffeine experience. You can make it hot, cold, put it in a protein shake. However you guys want to drink it, it's great. We're launching the creamer soon. Creamer's going to pre-sell very soon, but get the-Cromber. Get the coffee now while you can, because it is selling fast boys.

BodyBring Coffee.com. Use the promo code Regs 20, RGZ 20. Save 20% off in your order today. If you guys subscribe and get it monthly, you save 20% and you get free shipping, which is pretty incredible. Brain Coffee.com. Bigger, better, faster, stronger, you. That's not your, that's not it.

I know. I think that's another thing's thing. I think you, yeah, he goes, I've that tattooed in Old English on my back. The best part of waking up is body brain ear cup. I made that up just now. Now, wait a minute. All right, where we're...

Best part of waking up is body brain in your butt. Hey, folks, this week's episode of the regs is brought to you by Quince. God damn I love quince. Your wardrobe needs a winter reset. Quince is here to help you stay warm and look sharp from basics to statement pieces. You know we love

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This is good stuff that's meant to last, baby. I love it. They sent us some stuff. I'm wearing it every day, except for today. But I do wear it all the time, and I used it for my Christmas shopping. I went to quince.com. Is it quince.com? I think it's quince.com.

Yeah, quince.com bought a bunch of stuff. My mother, my father, my uncle, my brother. Everybody is wearing quince, baby. Right now, you've got to refresh your winter wardrobe with quince. Go to quince.com slash regs with a Z for free shipping on your orders. and 365 day returns. It's now available in Canada, too. I know we got a lot of Canadians up there.

Sorry about what's going on here. We love you, Canada. That's Quince, Q-U-I-N-C-E.com slash regs for free shipping and 365-day returns. Quince.com slash regs. Rags. Rags. I think the halftime show, we watched the Bad Bunny one first. I mean, and then we,

we went over to the turning points one. First of the other, people that hate on Bad Bunny, it was an entertaining show. This is how I felt about Bad Bunny. I watched it and I was like, that was really well produced. I told Katie, it felt like something you watch when you're trying to fuck a girl.

Where you watch it, and then at the end, you go, that's cool you want to get naked. It was like... I wasn't like, yeah. It felt like Bad Bunny was trolling all the people that hated the idea of a Puerto Rican media of the halftime show. He was like, let's get the most Puerto Rican stuff. we can do it.

We can come out of the wheat out of the corn and scare them. And by the way, no English. And that would have Pedro Pascal back there, but I don't say nothing.

I say nothing to him. They had like a fucking pawn shop. They had a barber shop. Everything in there meant something, though. The bodega is a bodega in Brooklyn. That lady is, not a bodega. It was a Puerto Rican social club.

One of the last of its kind, still in Brooklyn. That was the lady who owns it. Oh, that's cool. And the actual address on it is the address of the real. That's pretty cool. I just know that if I was a right-wing white Republican that hated the idea of that, that would have made my head explicit.

They would have been barking at the TV. Christine Hone is like, she's trying to put her face back on because it keeps falling off. You can't. People are getting mad. Obnoxiously Puerto Rican. And I thought it was a great performance. But it just like, they conceived seven children during the thing.

A little kid was actually supposed to be him as a little kid. Oh, okay. He was giving the Grammy to him, watching him. I thought I was just a deaf kid. And it was sugar cane. It wasn't cool. It was sugar. The corner is Mexican.

Sure. Sugar cane is their main product. The telephone polls, they always have outages. So there's always dudes up. I mean, the electricity, electricity. He goes, they're admitting it. All the right wingers are watching. They're like, they're just telling us they do it.

Here's how dumb some people are. They're saying it's not about America when Puerto Rico is America. And look, it's America. It's America. I'm Puerto Rican, but it's... You're Afro-Latina. I'm Afro-Latina. But, you know, look, when people are like,

oh, you know, Puerto Rican's part of America, it's like, not really. It is. It is. What is it? Commonwealth or a Prentil? Massachusetts is a Commonwealth. I think it's a Principality.

I think it's a Commonwealth. I think it's it. Is it? Principal or Commonwealth, look it up. Let's go out to the board. Five bucks. But you guys turned to kid rock and his jorts? Dude, it was...

I watched it this morning. Horribly. A song, I mean, just like, he was giving up on part. I watched this morning he was like, I'm a badass He was like still singing And he's like

And I'm getting in the pit And try to love something I know I know I know what we wanted to like it's You understand it's me Big J Bobby you guys would think it's much funnier If the turning boy

We wanted to love it I wanted to love it so much Bobby was one who held on the longest He was like no dude He's gonna get there Dude every element of the turning point Watching Bobby losing hope on everyone I dropped out at the cello

Dude it was crazy The cello They did just like the bit most horse shit like fucking it was fucking terrible I'm so sick of these country guys dressing gangster just dress country get a shirt with buttons with a fucking

horse on him it's a territory they're all dressing it's not a principality or sovereign nation Commonwealth all right we were wrong I was just I said we were wrong

calm down so you were right bring it down Dan you guys are being very aggressive so where was the where was the Kid Rock thing took place in a warehouse and the new ice warehouse. It was an airplane hanger.

No, no. How do you watch it? It's on YouTube. Two, three, four, five. Thank you very much. Grazie. Thanks, good. Danana.

Call him Bobby Singles. Right in front of you. Didn't you realize. Damn, you just throwing money around like that. Damn. Because you should have wanted to set them up. Thanks, be me. Do you guys watch the whole thing?

I only watched Kid Rock. They only allowed 300 people in, which was stupid. They should have did it somewhere outside and let everybody. come. It would have been a fucking massive crowd. I don't know how many people are working. I don't know if it would have been that massive of a crowd. Yeah. And it's, I don't think it would have. I think you would have got in a crowd, but I don't think it would be. Those people are huge in the country. They, they, one of those guys could have got fucking, at least a thousand people. Kid Rock being like this like Christian, it's like,

you're a cokehead. Shut the fuck up. It's so funny. The Christian grift is so funny. The Christian griff's fucking stinks. It makes me laugh really hard. Just people going, I bet Jesus changed everything I did. It's like you have the face of a porn star. You probably did the fuck that shit. I mean, Kid Rock was like, he's got a fucking. I mean, he's got. I mean, he's Doesn't he got a song about, like, fucking teenage girls? Like, statutory is how I roll. That's actually the Puerto Rican guy. I think one of his lines is that he fucks young girls.

It doesn't matter the age or something like that. Kid Rock in a song says. Yeah. I like him underage. Oh, is that kid rock? Yeah. What was the line? Look it up.

It's from the Osmosis. You read it and you just assigned it to the Puerto Rican. Because I don't like Puerto Rican. Because of you. Because of you. Which would make sense, Bobby. Yes. Can I tell you, if you localized your racism, a little bit understanding.

Yeah. A little... Sisko Chronicle, like Zodiac. I like him young, underage lyrics. It's from the Osmosis Jones soundtrack. That's all I know. We're going to Expedia. Dotka!

I love Puerto Rican. My favorite Spanish is Puerto Rican. And I thought he was... I thought it was great. I loved it. No, we all... It was weird because everyone was like, this is pretty entertaining.

It's pretty good. The way they did it was really cool. My one complaint about it was, I feel bad if you were in the stadium because you didn't see anything. It was all camera angles. It was them in between the sugar can. For the millions.

I know, but I'm saying, like, I think a good show would be, like, the stadium and at home. Yeah. Yeah. Prince was the shit. Was the shit. The shit. You know what? Even when I went to the Super Bowl and it was J-Lo, Shakira, and Bad Bunny, that was in the stadium.

That was like, holy shit. I saw Janet Jackson and Justin. Oh, yeah. When the Titty came out. And I literally looked at my guy, I go, I think he just, your titty came out. He's like, now. And then it came up on the Trin-Tron. But you know what I'm saying?

Like, that show was for the stadium and at home. That one was really good. good last night, but it was for the people at home. Yeah. It was more like a Grammy's type of thing. The line, the Kid Rock line says, some people call it statutory, but I call it mandatory. The track, Cool, Daddy Cool, featured in the children's movie Osmosis Jones. It includes the line, young ladies, young ladies, I like them

underage. See, some say that's statutory, but I say it's mandatory. Part of the first. Joe C. A little midget. Yeah. Kid Rock's late hype man collaborator. No, it was good. I thought it was great. I thought it was good. I liked it. It was all about who said, I think you said it, or Jay said it. They have sexy, sexy hot chicks back.

Yeah, that's in, it was back. Sexy. Hot people on TV. Yes. Like, we had a few years where it was like they were like some fat black lesbian, but yeah. Yeah, they brought, they brought out some juicy booty. It's all, like, it's all hot chicks. All the commercials are hot chicks and hot dudes. The commercial sucked. Yeah, I didn't really pay commercials. I thought the Duncan was good.

A, I, the Duncan one was good. First off, you're from Massachusetts. Come on, Tom Brady coming in at D's nuts. That was fun. You think in 80s, you think in 80s Ben Afflex hanging out with three black people? At Duncan, you might. There's no way to escape. First of all, Boston, black people don't drink coffee.

They are the coffee. But I thought the de-aging thing sucks. It's not good enough yet. The de-aging fucks me out. I think they put that together too quick. But also the Jurassic Park one looked off. I did like the karaoke one. doing one singing. Oh. I was just singing. It's so funny because it's, what's funny about commercials now is

it's light and cheery and then it's like, cancer medication. You're like, oh, fuck, what's this company? Yeah, they weren't that good, but I thought the Duncan one was good. I was kind of in and out. I didn't even They already aired Shane's, like, Kay. You were hosting. Yeah. You had to do your host duties. I did. Yeah, I thought it sucked. None of the commercials were good. You don't like the karaoke one? Nah. All right. Didn't, I, yeah. Yeah. That one right there. It just came on, and your screen became a karaoke. Yeah.

And let me say. Right there, and you started singing. I just started singing. I was the only one singing. Which is crazy. It was just me and those two wild cards in the living room singing. Can I tell you what? I mean, Josh was like, boy.

Josh was outside Smoker with Jay. Brother, sisters, everybody. This is it. I was doing this. I was doing this. Right here, ready? But can I tell you why they fucked up? They did a commercial with the Backstree Boys.

He got it wrong, the one might he tried. I got a wrong at your house, too. I'm original. Have you ever heard the song? I'm the only one. Yeah, yeah. They did it right after another commercial that had all the Backstreet Boys in it.

So it was like, what the fuck is this? It felt weird. I liked it. What was it in a commercial for? At the end, they have the... Did they sing? Oh, this is for Coinbase. Right at the end. It's in the song.

So you end up saying that. Ooh. That was pretty good. I liked it. I liked it. I thought it was fucking. I like a good unique marketing angle. Yeah. Did you see the Dirty Jew commercial?

Yeah, well, look at it. I'm listening to one now. Oh, fuck. What's up? What was the dirty Jew commercial? They're all Dirty Jew commercials technically, Danny. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Bro, look at him. That's what he said. Oh, I don't have to make his jacket dirty. Nobody says that. It's a handsome kid, by the way. Dirty Jew. Do not listen to that. It's the president.

Why wouldn't he take it off instead? First of all, thank you. That's the kid who wrote it. He goes, oh, hell no, you Jewish? Two and three Jewish teens experience anti-Semitism. He goes, you're not one of those blacks that thinks you're a Jew, are you?

He goes, oh, man, I kind of get why people are picking on you. Yeah. Get away from me, darky. Oh, a schvazza. What are you doing? Schwazza, get away from me. He goes, yo, man, I was trying to help you out.

You fucked up, man. Now I'm a dirty, dirty Jew. Yeah. I just, I would take help from any people but you. They're calling me dirty. Now I'm more dirty. Hey, everyone knows you're on muscle. Hey, you're going to fuck, dude.

I mean, I didn't. Do I owe, are you anything for this? Oh, hey, get away from me. Police help. Oh, sorry, you're helping with the bullying. Oy, I thought you're going to come over here and stuff me in a locker. I mean, we would make... Oye.

Oh, you're locked up on me. Are you on the basketball team? You should be. Are your security? Boy, hey, I didn't realize we hired security at the school. It's fun point-gartening that guy. It's fucking really fun. I mean, dude, it's fucking so fun.

Give him the ball. He goes. Can I get another coffee, please? Yeah, take another tea. Woo! Let's do plugs. Do some coffee. Feels like a chocolate brownie day.

Not me, bro. Dawn did make some fucking dope-ass chocolate brownies, though. She was making her cake. I know. That cake, and I got her into a documentary and it fucking burnt. Damn, you fucked up. I fucked up. What documentary?

I went to Casa Bonita. Oh, yeah. Buddy. You, Troy Parker, Matt Stone? Danny was like, we got to go. I used to, how did you guys get a table? He made reservations. When did you make him, Danny?

Two months out. Two months out. Yeah, you got to do that. So I was like, dude, he goes, you want to go? Because I'm going. I'm going. I was like, I'll go. Let's fucking.

How fun is it? Dude, it was the fucking best thing ever. Can I tell you something, though? When I was growing up, that place was a shit hole. Yeah. It was like really shitty. I wish I went to that. that version. It was so fun, though. I probably

went to four or five birthday parties in a row there. Right. And you go, and it's in like a, not a nice part of Denver. Dude, we saw three people getting arrested on the way. Yeah. And we saw a fucking crazy fight when we came out. The security from the dollar store right next door, yeah. Was beating the shit out of, like, him and this

homeless guy got into a fucking fight. It's not a nice, not a good part of Denver. Yeah, it was up, but dude, inside. I haven't got to go since they've renovated. It is so fucking cool. I want to go. Inside there. We saw that. Have you been? No.

It's, they have, they have, uh, cliff divers. So you're eating. Yeah. We ever saw the South Park episode of Casabinita? Yeah. So funny. It's so funny. It's maybe the best episode of South Park.

But I have the documentary. It's one of my favorite. The documentary they made. Well, hey there. Dude, they, they bought it for, uh, three, three million. Ended up spending 18. There was the budget was six point five million. They, the budget wound up being $40 million.

That's crazy. I didn't know I got that. Yeah. They spent 40 million. That documentary is great. That was great, but I got her into that. And then we burnt the cake. I apologize, but she did make brownies.

Let's do plugs. What's up? All right, go to Punch Up. What? Hold up. If you're not doing plugs, can you text your coffee? Yeah, I'm doing that right now, buddy. Same thing that I got before.

Punchup. Live slash Robert Kelly is the only place to go to get my dates. February 12th, I'll be in Cincinnati, Ohio, at Bombs Away. And then the 13th and the 14th, I'm going to be at the Attic Comedy Club in Columbus, Ohio. And then, of course, I'm going to be Batavia, Illinois at the Comedy Vault. I'm very excited when I read my dates. The 27th and the 28th. Then I'm going right to Mohegan's son, the 17th and 18th.

And then I'm going to be in Cleveland, Ohio at Hilarity. What a club. Shout out, Scott. I love him. Shout out Nick. Nick is the best. Scott, Nick, the great. So I'll be there the 15th and 16th.

And then I'm going to governors. And I got a couple of surprise dates in there. You'll see me. You know. I know. It's going to be really cool. So, yeah. So I'm very excited about this.

that. Go to punchup.com. slash Robert Kelly and go to my YouTube page. Check out Killbox. It's up there for free. And if you're on Punch Up, you get live from the Village Underground for free. It's up there, too. Both of my specials. And that's going to walk me into mind.

Go to Punchup. Live and sign up for my page as well. You can watch... Lunch Up, brother. Movie watchalongs that I did with Nick Mullen and Katie and Brendan Sagelow. I got one coming up for Netflix as a joke festival. If you're in L.A., I'm going to be doing a watchalong of a movie with Tim Dillon. That's going to be May 6th.

Pardon, Netflix is a joke festival. But I'm on the road right now. Is this coming out Wednesday or next Wednesday? This Wednesday. Okay, this Wednesday. Buffalo, New York, I'll be there February 28th. And then Boston, March 6th, added a 9 p.m. show at the Schubert. 7th.

You're doing the Schubert? Yeah. Fog, dude. Yeah. Congratulations. Thanks, buddy. I'm excited. That's great.

And then March 7th, Philadelphia. I'll be there. Dan Soder.com. All tickets. are on sale now for the last leg of the Golden Retriever of Comedy Tour. Dallas, Houston, Oklahoma, also Long Island, Charlotte,

and Durham, North Carolina. DanSoter.com, listen to Soter to the podcast, sign up for my YouTube page at Dan Soder. I love you. Who's next? When does this come out? Wednesday? Tonight on Gas Digital. Nice. I don't know what Gas Digital is.

Vancouver, we have a few tickets left. Built More Cabaret. That's Thursday. San Francisco, two shows Friday, two show Saturday, one show Sunday. Hobbs, baby. Limited tickets still available. Virginia Beach. Could you scroll up just a little bit, Virginia Beach? February 27th and 28th, San Antonio, March 6 through the 8th.

And of course, Tom Dustin Portrait of a Comedian is available on Punch Up Live for like six bucks. Oh, and then Karen and Sarah and I recorded a podcast two years ago that we never released. We put that on Punch Up, too. You can go check that out. And it's funny. Come see me live on the road, guys. the YoCreatum.com presents Rattle Me This Tour

Coming to a city near you. I like that. Thank you. I really like that. I didn't want to like it. I mean, I would love to know my dates, but, you know,

there's really slow to be. They're coming, dude. No, no, it's not. So I can't be rich. It's okay. Come see me, excuse me. Come see me in Emias, Pennsylvania

on February 26th, Thursday night. Paco's coming to these shows, too. Comedy Bar on Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, February 27th, and 28th. Then I'm in Tacoma, Washington,

and March. Spoken, Washington, March. Toronto's coming up. Can't wait to come back to Toronto. Catacombs Cabaret. Those shows will sell out. It's a very small venue. Detroit, after that, Springfield, Missouri,

Tulsa, Oklahoma, and more. Lots of dates being added. I'm going to Australia this year. I'm going back to Europe in the beginning of next year. So keep on looking out for those things. Skank Fest presale, February 16th. If you guys want to get pre-sell tickets, which gives you access to the VIP party,

plus the VIP balcony upstairs. We're opening a VIP balcony with a lounge and a specialty t-shirt just for VIP. ticket holders, go to skankfest.com and get your tickets on February 16th at 2 p.m. Eastern. Don't blink. Those tickets are going to sell out very, very quickly. Sign up for Gas Digital. If you love the show, we do the uncensored and ad-free version of the show. If you hate all of the YouTube ads that keep on interrupting the show, guess what? You can watch it before it goes anywhere else. A couple days before it releases to YouTube. It's on gas digital.com. Use the promo code regs,

R-E-G-Z, and you save a couple bucks a month and get you access to the premium version of the show. Check out all my other podcasts, Legion of Skanks, Story Wars, The Realized Podcast. Sign it from a mailing list to get the Lewis Journal podcast, my solo podcast. Last but not least, go pre-order my book, Knives and Spoons at Shipping on March 3rd. We're doing an audio version soon, too. I think it's going to be around the same time. But if you get the actual book, and if you bring it out to one of my shows, I'll sign it for you. And yeah, that's that.

Why am I not doing my voice for the show? You are. You are. Okay. I'm sorry. It's okay. I should have asked you. No, no, no, please.

I mean, I already asked you. You don't remember. But then you said, don't worry about it. No, I didn't. Yeah, you did. Maybe I was supposed to do it. I was like, I just say things. I do.

It's called speaking. But you're not true. You're not always right. You're saying untrue things. You say untrue things. We all say untrue things. We do. We're learning.

We're growing. Together. Joe? Yes. Oh, sorry. I was watching a good reel. Seance. Patrice O'Neill.

If you could see this portal, come back. Come back to us. We need you to clear the hack off planet Earth. Please wipe away all the hack on. earth he comes through bobby he's like oh yeah shut the fuck up all you do is voices i go damn he was good at being mean who's up that it jo joe plug i did pro i we're done what's up we're back am i sexual can you try that on i want to see yeah i bet it looks great on him and i rock your body he's gonna start wearing hoops hoop hoops hoop hoop be earrings portoican boom nailed them yeah i like that it's

Artsy. Stick them up. It's artsy. Looking like a wool sock. Pull it down. Pull it down. Can you see us? Motherfucker over here looking like a wall.

Whoa. Oh, that's love. Call the police. Call the police. Call ice. Oh, a little babushka. That's good. Scary.

That's why I like a hoop. It keeps you warm. Nice. But. Lewis of Arabia. Isn't the wind going to come up the back year? No, you pull that down too. You do this.

Yeah. No, I'm good. Come. Thank you. Cup of cum That wasn't me Pull it down Let me see

Pull it down on your neck Now fluff it up a little bit That looks good on you dude You look fucking good Uncumcised penis ass Put those on These look good Look how good he's gonna look

You look fucking badass You look like a pop singer That lost his mind Take the hat off though That's nice dude You look good Take the hat off There we go

Is that pit bull? Is that Mr. Worldwide? What the fuck? Oh my God dude You look fucking great. Two and two. I'm on Andre's you. He is he.

I'm going skiing on Saturday. Oh, shit. Look at that. What are you? What do you mean jerking off to guys? Who are the boys? You're bringing James? Bringing James, bringing my sister, my niece.

What are you going? My niece is so mean. When are you going? She's just a monster. What do you mean? She's just mean. She's like, fuck you Uncle Lewis. Yes.

Straight up. Lewis, when are you going skiing? Saturday. Why don't you bring Max? He snowboards. All right. Well, there you go for that. No, he can come.

No, cool. But what he's going to do? No. The problem is... You'll put him on a lens first, you fucking idiot. He's just fucking $1,200 dollars. Skeying and snowboarding. How much they pay in you over a tears?

I got out of the wrong time. Not a lot. Not a lot. Boy, can't he go? Because no whites? Well, no, skiing and snowboarding. What was that? There are different paces.

One of the kitchen workers downstairs asking a very. a race? It's a different pace. You know what I'm saying? We're skiing. Yeah, but he can just go and do his stuff. Why? What are you, an old white country club member?

Why do you hate skiing? Did snowboarding just fuck it? It's harder. It's very hard. It's really hard. I'm pretty good at skiing. Skiing, once you learn how to ski, it's like riding a bike.

It's all mental. Yeah. Right? Well, it's about learning how to stop. That's a little physical. You know Loon Mountain up in New Hampshire? The last time I went skiing, this girl begged me. me to go for months. I finally did it. I'm like, all right, we'll go. I go to the mountain. I come

down. It was one of the most serene, beautiful things that it was snowing. It was kind of dark. I came down by myself. I got to the bottom. Wolves attacked him. That was the greatest thing ever. That's how he lost the weight. That's the greatest thing. This is 20 years ago. Sure. The greatest thing ever. She was just sitting there in a little white little ski bunny outfit. She goes, we had to leave. She shit her pants. What? Yeah, she got like a stomach virus the night before. In a white little snow? Dude, it was fucking gross. Oh, she all zipped up in it? Dude, for two days we're in this little cabin.

She was just shitting. Oh. Oh. Have you skied, Joe? No. Never more. Ever? Not once.

I think you'd like it. We'd have to get him pizza slicing first. Yeah, pizza breakfasts. Oh, that's great. He loves that. Joe looks like a ski. It's easier, but it's harder to get great at, apparently. I mean, did you guys watch Lindsay Vaughn crash?

No. So she was like, she's 41 years old. She was coming back to the Olympics for the last time. She's one of the greatest skiers America's ever had from Vail College. She's like the best. She's practicing a couple weeks ago blows her ACL. Completely blows her ACL. She goes, I'm going to ski.

Everyone's like, what do you mean? She was like, oh, I don't know. Yeah. Like it. And they're like, you're going to ski. She's like, I'm still going to ski in the Olympics. Does practice runs and everything? And everyone's like, all right, there's one event downhill.

Can we see it? She gets one run. We could have our producer was, as we're talking, bringing it up. That doesn't exist anymore. That's not a thing that's real. but Katie and I were like excited to watch it live because they re-brought

So we recorded the 5 a.m. one And when we woke up, Super Bowl Sunday, we were like, oh, put on Lindsay Vaughn. We'll watch. And we watched like a couple skiers. We're like, here we go. Lindsay Vaughn. And they're like, for her last time

of the Olympics, it's Lindsay Vaughn. And she's like, doot, doot. Immediately crashes within six seconds in a way that was so bad that it shut down the mountain for 30 minutes. And the air lift her off.

Was it related to the knee injury? Dude, I don't know what it was. She just went like, she came around one of those corners and how fast they're going, and she just like didn't touch down. And then when she came down and it went like, she didn't sell everything, but she got rolled up in a way that you're like, oh. I told my ACL and Torgas. Yeah.

And you can walk and you start to do things. Yeah. I was at Bonaroo and I thought I was great. I stepped off the curb and my knee just folded sideways. Yeah, it's terrible. Oh. Yeah, do knee injuries suck. And my knees are better now.

Is this it? Yeah. Here's the video we started talking about five minutes ago. It's a minute seven seconds. She's got no. Yeah, I was going to say her tits suck, dude. Fuck you, bitch. I was like, I like woke up.

I was like leaning on my bed with like sleeping my eye on. I still think she's going to do it. I don't know why. Yeah. Sports on delay. You know what, guys? I think she's going to make this more. Her sticks are bent. Yeah.

Why the yelling? Yeah, baby. Let her. Lenzie Vaughn pulls out of the gate. It hopes. It's this corner. I just know after the years of watching her She will ski at her limit

That one Right here Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh she's in pain But go back to

She's like if I had tits Go back They'd be her Look at this asshole just looking What was that guy You guys? What was the announcer saying? Oh my headphones

He goes like Here she goes I just know She just I just know She's gonna push it to the Oh And there goes glass

I mean dude Just going straight Like You go so fast, even like this. She starts picking up speed. She starts picking up speed. Oh, yeah.

That feeling when you, and I'm talking about going much, much slower, but when you feel your skis go like that on the snow, you go, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. I remember I fell, I fell on, I accidentally wanted to, I have a joke about it in my act, but I accidentally went up to the, like the black

diamond. Do the joke. No, that's okay. Dude, I fucking, I fell, I, the joke was that I tried to like walk down the mountain and ends, but that's not really sure. At first I tried to ski it. I was like, I can do it.

Black Diamond is. Dude, I fucking, I mean, you're just, you'll, you just drop in so hard. And I like busted my ass. I rolled like that, dude. And my ski flipped off my body. And the skis have a break on them. So, yeah, those two things that come down. When it's off your foot, the prongs come down so your ski doesn't, that broke during

my fall. So I just watched my one ski just silently just shoot all the way down the mountain. Which is a problem for everybody on the mountain. Dude, I had to fucking walk down and find this in the woods. Like, I literally traced it. all the way to the woods. It was starting to get dark on the mountain. Yeah, you're lucky you didn't kill anybody.

Dude. Because you're seeing like a fucking orange ski and you're going down pretty fast. Like, what the fuck? It's like, dude, I, um, I skied and was called gay by all my friends because they were all snowboarders. And we call you that now. But they were like, come up and snowboard. And I did it once and I was all right.

I could get down the mountain and my friend Joel had snowboards. And he's like, no, come back and we'll go again. And I'm like, got this. I wore, just how stupid I was. I wore sweatpants with jeans over them and like my snow jacket. Why wouldn't you do it the other way around? Jeans with sweatpants over them. I don't know.

I just thought that was the way to go. Sweat pants are stretchy. I thought the sweatpants were warm and then the denim over it. But I went on a black diamond run by accident on a snowboard. And every time I tried to get up, there was another hill was the moguls. So every time I was trying to get up, I would like push myself up and then like scoot. It was I got back to my friend's truck and laid in the back and had to wait for him freezing cold. in wet jeans.

You're skiing is fucking nuts. You get hurt so quick. Yeah, yeah. My uncle doesn't walk right. He was skiing into his like 60s and then he fell and he hurt something in his back and he had to get an operation. Now he walks weird. I don't know.

Kind of like an old wrestler. You can't be afraid. Like as soon as you start having fear, you start just busting your ass. Yeah. My uncle who taught me how to ski was like you just got to bail. He's like if you start feeling scared, just bail. It's a safer thing to do. I was in the rubber rooms when I got out of rehab.

I had to do like the crazy room like Mr. Lions class. It was in like eight of us. There was like two Korean chicks. They didn't speak English. They weren't crazy. They're like, we just don't speak English. And then they had this project rat.

She was, looked like Big Bert. She was like eight feet tall with big fluffy hair. And then they had this hot chick from California with big tits. And they took us, in a couple of them, they took us all skiing. And I remember the Asian girls were just going down the mountain. Oh, and da-da, just having a blast. The ski bunny chick, she could ski. But this project rat, she forgot the pizza thing.

And she just put her skis down. but she was on the side where the trees were. So she was just flying past us, just hitting her face in the tree. And we were just yelling, pizza! Pizza! That's what you yell, everybody.

That's why we just yells. Dude, I can really go for it. Dude, does everybody say pizza? Hey, guys, while we're on the mountain, can we use a different word? They hire trigger for me, okay? They actually hire me for the bunny slope. Yeah, pizza.

You know what? You don't work for money. If you don't take that beginner lesson, If you don't take that lesson, you'll just be like, all right, I'm going to put these on and just, you're going to put these on and just right away. You're like, you're going to aim down. And then when you start picking up speed and skis, it's not like a bike where there's a break. You're just like, that thing. Where you feel like, you're like, you're like, what the fuck?

It's so fun, though. I really like it. But when it's snow, it's better than when it's ice. I've done the ice and it sucks. Well, I also. The Northeast sucks. If you went to, um, I went to Colorado's and it was like, it was incredible. Well, the first time I went to the East Coast, you're like, what the fuck?

Yeah, it's just all ice. They wet the mountain down. You guys are shit. Dude, I went in Salt Lake City and it was like... Yeah, that's crazy. The most beautiful Park City, dude? Oh, my God, dude. I went up...

It was like a green run, like just a beginner one. It was like 15 minutes of just going. My friends were, you know, when you would grow up in Colorado, they would offer this thing like a five mountain pass that was like 500 bucks, unlimited runs. On all the mountains? On all the five main mountains. So you get like A Basin, Vail, Beaver Creek, Keystone, like all the big ones. Yeah.

And my friends would just, like, get out of school at 12 and just drive up to Vail, which was like hour and a half way. It was 65 degrees all week out there. Yeah, they got no snow. Yeah. Oh, Colorado? I was walking around with just a t-shirt out there. But then it'll snow tomorrow. Do you see the fucking river right now?

It's like Alaska. The whole fucking river is frozen over. I've never seen it like that. Where at? Here. Really? Yeah. Dude, I was driving down the west side highway.

The entire fucking river. The Hudson? The Hudson, dude. Yeah. It's frozen. It's wild. It's been cold Nonstop here on a level that you're like

Why are you mad at God? My whole house is just a fucking ice cube It's insane I walk around like it's Superman's fortress of solitude That's how cold it is And I call Katie Lois It's a thing we're into it. Lois J. Gomez

She goes Hey are you Superman? Look at this That's crazy Yeah You can see it from space It's fucking wild The entire river's frozen

Nuts I kind of like it Yeah you like being cold I don't mind it. I'm trying out. I put lotion on my hands. It makes us tougher. It puts the lotion on your hands.

It does make it tougher. Then when spring comes, you're like, fuck. Yeah. And then you feel sexy in the summer. You go, I was out there not eating sweets. Yeah. Oh, I hate it, dude. It's like 40 degrees of Florida, and they're panicking.

Yeah. You know why it's great, though? Because the seasons are great because you do go through them. And then by the time it's like summer and you're sick of it, you get that first cold day in fucking September or October. And you're like, I love it. Yeah, that's why it's better. than Austin. We're going to milk this thing every episode.

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Oh, no, I saw that Matt McCusker played Jesse Jackson to you and LaMere. Yeah, yeah. He brought together the two brothers as a brother like Matt to bring together two other brothers with a miscommunication. Was it good? We all good? Yeah, we're all good. Yeah. Boys,

stand down, but stand by. Oh, okay. You fucking clear his road. Yeah, fucking quaint. You're gonna bring him to Skankfest and finish this? Lamere, I think we might pro-w wrestle at Skankfest. That'd be sick. Didn't he do a match?

Yeah, he did. He did like an actual match. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I talked to, we're talking to J.C.W. For Skangfest right? Junkler Champion of wrestling. Fuck yeah. Which is a part of that.

Yeah, yeah. So we might do the fights at like, you know, one or two. And then in the evening, like, 6 p.m., They're going to do J-CW pay-views. Yeah, why don't you do that? That'd be really fun. Can you do that? And then I talked to Violin-J.

I was like, dude, I want to wrestle. He's like, he's like, main event, we're going to get you in a fucking tag team match. Dude, can I be your manager? Yeah, 100%. I'm going to have crack Kimiko, uh, walk me out. Yeah, I'm going to have a cane. I'm going to be like one of the dandy managers. I'm going to be Asian.

I'm going to give you a big salt, a bag of salt. You throw it in their eyes. Like that? I've always wanted to be Mr. Fuji. Yeah. Oh, my God. Let's do it. this is why you like Skankfest.

I get it. I was talking about... You finally get it. I was talking about the fight he got into with that dude. Oh, but yeah, but he broke it down on skanks. But is that guy... Is that guy has a problem?

He's had... This isn't the first problem he's had, right? Yeah, he was... He had, like, three fights that night in Austin. And then he... That's his sets? Yeah. He's like, I got three in.

I won't give the whole thing, but it's pretty funny. Like... The skank... Watch skanks, because the breakdown is very... Yeah, he was in the creek, and he starts screaming at this... Actually, I found it after he's screaming,

I'll fight anybody in here. He's trying to heckle. And Lewis is like, I'm your huckleberry. So why did he stop the fight? Why did he change his mind? So he, uh... You said fight? Rebecca, you're an oak.

Why, Rebecca, you're not wearing a bustle. How lewd. So Rebecca goes and kick him out, and then, uh, they're kicking him out. He's cursing. And I was like, I was like, I was like, I'll shut the fuck up because he's screaming at Rebecca. So I'm like, shut the fuck up. He's like, you shut the fuck up, motherfucker.

Meet me outside. And I was like, okay. And then I went. outside and I just expected him to be walking away. He was already in a karate stance. Very funny. And then I You walking outside to someone going like this and you go. Yeah, he could fight.

He kind of. Not really. He checked the kick. Lewis checked the kick and Big Jay brought up a point on skanks. So I think it was Dave. You checked the kick and the guy went Oh. No, he literally turned around. He was like, I don't want to fight anymore. He was going to be alone. So. You're harassing me. Yeah. So he but then like I, you know, I'm assuming

like comics are going to get between us. Like security is going to get there. I turn around and it's just 40 people with their cameras out. Conta. If you're a comic, if you're a fucking comic and you're filming another comic fighting,

that's fucking gay. It's like, what are you doing? Are you a fucking college student that's pulling out your phone? Tell you that? You would have done that

at the mothership. Fucking, a sniper in the bird would have, one of the snipers up in the nest would have taken care of him. He goes,

Joe, I have a shot on a guy would have dropped down seals would have dropped out of the helicopter. Joe's in his bat cave and he goes, take the shot.

Joe lives in a cave below. Mothership. It's all bottom-lit like Batman. He picks up a phone. What did you want the other comics to do? Join in? Tony comes down to leather ones. If you were going to get it to a fight,

either I'm joining in or I'm getting in between and making sure you're not fighting. I assume somebody would like, no, Lewis. Nate had the best joke about that, and it was about you. Oh, yeah. About staying up New York, where he's like, I watched my friend

on him was getting to a fight. And he's like, I was like, no, I'm going to let it go and then see what happened. He goes, that's the worst idea. He's like, then this guy just beat up three guys. He's warmed up. Yeah. And then Nate's punchline, he goes, you want me just to climb on top of the pile?

Yeah, I don't guess. You're making the decision to go out in the street and fight a guy. I'm drunk. I'm retarded. It is funny that he was basically going. But he trains all the time for this moment. Yeah, you love to fight. You've decided to fight.

You've made the decision. This is vigilante shit. This is the scene where Jack Horner asked Dirkler to jerk off. And he goes, I just did. Do you want me to do it again? No, you don't let your friends get into fights. You don't let him go out and detainty. Texas where people have guns.

No, you don't let yourself get into a fight. You fucking, I got a responsible. Who are you in? Joe just ran. Joe ran three blocks the last time they were attacking him. He made that one. It was like Don Knox. Well, I don't know.

I wish I wish it was a fish. Well, you should have been there. What you're supposed to do if your friend's going to get into a fight for you there? You get his back or you fucking don't let him fight. That's what you do with your friends. Period. That's what you do. That's what men do.

By the way. You don't go get him. Also, let me. add to Lewis's explanation because Lewis is not wrong, but you got an ad in an eye roll where you go, Lewis is getting into a fight again. You don't go out there like, you are wrong.

But I've never seen him do that. I have. I have never seen it. When have you seen me get into a thing? Poster dog, at least once. Maybe. You are the guy that goes, I'll go outside with you. I take that back. The first time I met him was going to kill his roommate. I told him, I told this story on your mom's

house. Really? Yeah. With the knife? Didn't you put the knife out? I put the knife on the, he wanted to get the cable box out of my room. So I went home, we got to do a huge thing. Then I put a fishing knife on top of the cable box. SSA, if you touch this, I'm going to kill you with this knife. But didn't you also say you would stab him? No, I was like, I'll kill you, Papa.

A lot of that. It was very like, I could have been in the Bad Bunny video. He goes, Louis, I need you have my Super Bowl performance because of Puerto Rico you are. No, that was, but that was 15 years ago. Yeah. Yeah. No, that's crazy. If you, if someone offers to fight you and you accept and you go out in the street

and fight. Yeah. And then the guy knocks you out. Then your friends run in and go, okay, okay, you got it. You don't go. You jump him at that point. Are you? You're a fucking pussy,

are you, dude. These are white, and you're a pussy. You can't control yourself. We have to be responsible for your decisions. That's fucking pussy. If you're a beta. If you're blackout,

if you're a blackout drunk. Look at me. You're not in a blackout. Stop. I was. I was fucking retarded. You sure remember a lot of details. That's because I watched the video back.

Well, then you're an asshole. That was a lot of 16. the video? Yeah, you had 16 fucking angles from all the comics filming. How did Danny get one that was across the street? Somebody else was watching it. And the guy kept calling you gay, which was great. That video is great. He's like, this is gay. Well, because

Lewis checked the kick, and then the guy was trying not to end it without losing prize. He said it hurt. No, it didn't hurt at the time. It hurts now. It still hurts. And then you tried to hug you, and then you didn't go for that. No, he didn't try to hug me. He did like one of these. No, no, no, no. Play it back. I was doing this.

So we can't play it back? No, because it's gone. Danny doesn't have that video? No. You deleted that video? The one that went viral was deleted, yeah. I'm talking about the one we saw that Danny sent it. I didn't put it up.

So it was, I went to go, I was, it looks like I was trying to dab him up, but I was going, you're a f***. That's what I was doing. So you're confused. That was what it was. I wondered that because I saw that. It looked like I was going,

it looked like I was trying to be like, all right, we're cool now, but it wasn't. I was literally going, what happened? You're a fucking bitch. You're walking away now? Because the guy literally turned around. he turned his back to me.

People were like, dude, that was your opportunity. I was like, I'm not going to punch you guy in the back of his ass. That's the worst feeling, though, when you're going to fight somebody and you look over and he's got the jab going. He's in boxes, stanching. Like, oh, this stinks. Oh, look how he moves. This is doing this shit.

I'll make the point again, right? Like, neither of us really wanted to fight. There was nobody between us. Nobody was stopping us. Who's banging? I don't know. Someone's at the door, guys. It wasn't me.

Someone's banging. It looks like he goes to dab you up. Where? Can you guys see if someone's at the door? Let me say. Right here. Oh, it might be Lewis shaking his leg. That's what I'm seeing.

He sounds like one of these. No, that was, oh, yeah, yeah, no, no, I see. No, we were just both kind of like putting our hands up. You could see what I'm talking. They were doing a wizard battle. We're both calling each other fiss in pussies and being like, yeah, you're a bit. Is he been in a house for a Super Bowl party in the kitchen? All he's doing is you.

But you do see what I'm talking about. It looks like right here. He wasn't trying to dab me up. Right. By the way, a different angle on Lewis is, oh, yeah. But he was going like that. Yeah, we were just trying to create distance, keeping our hands up. That's what that's what it was.

Basic street fighting knowledge. Yeah, it was retarded. It was embarrassing and retorted. Did you wake up the next day and go, fuck. Yeah. And then I started DMing with him because he was in the, he was in the comments. We were both in the comments. And it's like, uh, then he was, I was like, I was like,

Is he a comic? No, he's like a rapper. So I was like, I was like, let's go meet up at a gym and sign a waiver and fucking do it. And then everyone was like, you're an idiot. Don't do that. Everyone's encountered. And also was like, that's retarded. Don't do that.

And then I was like, yeah, this is retarded. I shouldn't do that. Was he like, yeah? Yeah, he was like, we could do it in my courtyard. I was like, you're insane. That's good. 50 of his cousins. He's like, definitely coming to my courtyard.

I was going to, I started calling around to gyms to get it done. And then I was like, what am I even fucking doing? Like, if he was cool, if he had any self-reflection, right? If he was like, yeah, we were idiots last night. Like, I would have just invited him to Skangfest to do it there. It'd been funny. Like, like, in the Royal Rumble, if he showed up, like, oh, my God, it's not, it's not, you should still do that. Now, he's not, he was trying to start fights.

the way he's a problem he's not like he didn't show up the next name like oh I was drunk I'm an idiot he's mentally insane he's mentally fucking insane I'm not gonna bring him into skankfest which is a place where we all love each other he bit crack me goes zero I don't know what we're gonna do it's like actually like crack has a lawsuit oh shit

Harry Togianian was stabbed with this guy he goes Sean Donnelly got chokeslam by the guy through a table no he wasn't like uh cool like if he was like a cool guy after he was like yo I was an idiot I was black out drunk last night and it had any self-reflection yeah that's like with hecklers when you deal with them the next day and they're still like fuck you i was helping the show yeah so he's

like he's like reposting the video being like you like just yeah it was just some fucking was he saying that he won or he scared you yeah i'm sure yeah yeah i thought you scared it's fine we don't have to play it anymore we got it was one point where he just like i'm out i'm done and then he started doing that weird thing goes i'm standing my ground hey you just quit yeah but he was what was he saying i'm standing here this is my fire me i quit yeah are you doing that in the fight right now he goes I am. It was so fucking weird. I don't want to be a part of it.

It was embarrassing. Did it ruin the trip or did it just make it like? No, no, no. My chick was there for the first time. So she was wet. She's from Philly. She was like, yeah, get fucking get him. She goes, yeah, he's how you fight you outside?

You better go fucking do that shit. It really doesn't make a Philly chick wet. She goes, oh, I'm not going home with you. Eat her, you're going to fucking split open that black guy. Or I'm not going to hang with you. What the fuck is it loose? Are you fucking, are you fucking spitting or not? That would suck if you got.

I knocked him out and his chick was standing. Oh my gosh. Lelis, wake up! She goes, I want you to see this. She goes, I want you to see this. She goes, suck my tongue, stud. I woke up. She was gone.

Oh, shit. Anyway, it's a, you know, I reset the clock. I'm an idiot. Yeah. Well, you really are zero days without incident. I try. I try it. No one's perfect.

And you go, fuck, you know, we didn't have a, we didn't have a mistake. Lewis factory. We should get 30 days we get a lobster dinner. Did you have to finish your set? How much time was like? We should go to dinner every 30 days at lobster. Oh, I wasn't on stage. I was at the bar just

hanging. Oh, I thought you were on stage. They were kicking out. He started heckling at the open mic and then fucking What a fuck. What a loser. Hackling at open mic is a sign of mental insane. No, did he got jumped at the Kill Tony bar where all the comics were waiting to go up in Kill Tony. He was there just being a menace there and a bunch of people just

jumped him and then the security threw him down the stairs. Then he walks straight over to the creek. He goes, I need more. Yes, too. Because I won't get my ass kicked over here. He really was doing it like spots. Yeah, yeah. He goes, I'm going to go to the Velveeta room, get kicking the teeth,

head back up to the creek. I got to get a cab, go to Cap City. And then I got to get a fight under that highway. God knows who I'm going to see. But anyway, yeah. I really love it was you. And he was going like, anybody want to fight? And you're like, right there.

Yeah. I got number six for the fight. Yeah. But, you know, that's fucking retarded. I'm not trying to be. that person. But you're not responsible. I was responsible. The other comics are responsible. No, Joe, that's not what I'm saying.

I mean, it sounds like that's saying. Joe's getting full. I'm saying if you're a fucking prosecutor on you. But that's not what you said. If one of my friends was drunk and about to go get into a fight with a stranger in the street, I would stop them so he doesn't get hurt or arrested. That's what I'm saying. I would stop Lewis and remember, I would tell him footwork, remember to twist your hips, punch through the target.

I mean, it would be a tough thing. If Joe was going to do it, if Joe was going to do it, I'd stop you. Well, you go, you're in a circle. You go, Epicanezer and I go. When I first saw the fight, I was watching, like, get him, Lewis. Yeah, come on, fucking go. Lewis is my friend that I cheer for in fights. Right.

You too, I would genuinely be worried. You're just older now, so I don't want you to get hurt. Like, you're just a pussy dancing. No, I think Joe can't find. It feels like this is your Christmas. I wouldn't stop you because it would be like if Karen was like, let's make love and you guys tried to stop me. I'd be like, what are you doing?

It's true. This is my moment. If someone went, can anybody do a macho man voice around here or no? Yeah, yeah. Don't go out there. Don't do a macho impression. I go, Eat the fingers.

The fingers. Yeah, but I'm like... Lewis finally got the call. Yeah, dude. I thought it was your night to be a vigilante and save everybody. It's like how Pam Anderson got discovered on a jumbo tron.

The guy was just at a bar going, anybody want to fight? The problem is, though, he's right. He's with his girl. You can't fight when you're with your girl. No, you can't. Like, remember Pete Dominic? Is that why he couldn't fight?

Because that was embarrassing. But his girls, I was at the Caroline Christmas party and she... Don't let him! Right. If I went to go beat your ass right at a vacation, stop me. I would have to. I was at the Christmas party and Pete Dominic

came up to me and started calling me fucking names like nose to nose. For what? But I was with Dawn. I don't know. He came up and goes what the fuck are you going to do. Isn't that more reason? Weird shit like that out of the blue. That's weird. So I literally, I go, Don, let's go. I took her home in a cab, put her the front, almost like good fellas, pushed her in the door, went back.

Nice. And I went you, come here. And he's like what? I go, I'm going to fuck you up. outside right now. I took her home. God forbid I fight Pete Dominic and he gets the best thing. Oh my God. Oh, she's got to watch. You can't fight where you chick around it. Her having to wake you up. I would have sucked. Bobby. Bobby.

Yeah, I mean, look, the reality was, that guy wasn't big enough to fucking, like, I was. He was a, he had length straight. He was a lanky guy. And, um, I wasn't worried. I wasn't worried about a hidden character from Tekon 3. It was, by the way. Perfect. Yeah. For a video game reference? 20 out of 10.

If you're going to fight somebody in the street, that guy... Joe and I got it around the same time in the morning because you could tell we both started putting the ha-ha emojis. I was pooping, and I watched the video, then I saw your video. I was like, perfect. I asked for a brownie. This is a cookie.

I told you there's no brownies at Starbucks. I also asked for us. I appreciate you. It's not a bit. I have Paco blocked, damn. Thanks, Paco. Thank you, Paco. Thank you, Paco.

Thank you, Paco. Thank you, Joe. Joey. Joeie. Yeah, that would have sucked if the video went, if the guy got the best of you, I would not want to see you to get hurt. Also, if you would have got knocked out,

I don't think you would have been able to get in the mothership ever again. They'd be like, you can't. Well, that was the best part of was Rogan fucking coming up to me in the mothership green room. He's like, heard you got into a fight. I was like, ah, we had a little like thing. It wasn't really a fight.

He's like, I heard you got kicked twice. I was like, I checked one. He was like, not what I heard. Lewis lost technically. But admit, that is kind of a cool thing of Joe Rogan breaking down. down your fight. Ian Finance knocked out a guy. I heard that. A couple days before.

Where? In Austin. At the creek? No, some dude was like a John 6th Street, like being racist. And then Ian's a fagic. So, you know, he's like, not racist. I'm not my... This is what pussy's everyone in Austin is that Ian came and he was tough in Austin, which is crazy. Good for him. I like that he got an A K.

Yeah. Knocked out an Indian guy, a racist Indian guy. What? Yeah, he was anti-Semitic. Oh, and he saw Ian? And he was... Because Ian looks Jewish. He does look too. No, I think Ian, I don't think he said anything about Ian being Jewish. She was talking to that chick, like a hot Israeli chick. What the fuck's her name?

Her last name's Moore. I don't know. A chick named Moore? Her last... Yeah. Her name's O'Donohue, like this? Good Jewish girl. You know.

Callahan. You know, the strong Jewish names. I go right from the club to the hotel. I don't even fuck around with that street. Sixth Street stinks. It's fucking crazy at night. Um, let's see. No, not pan. It's M-O-R.

M-O-R. Jewish female. Probably M-O-H-R. That sounds more Jewish. It does. No, she's Israeli. I forget her name. She has, like, long pink hair, usually.

So Ian defended a girl. Ian defended her. Ian was being a simp, and then he knocked out a dweeby, hammered Indian guy. Damn, but you know what, though, if you are going to pad your stats, go get a guy, go get a hit the head of his alcohol. Or he's like, I want you to know that most of the time I drink alcohol, it makes my tummy a little queasy. Also, the Jews are a problem.

And he's like, there we go. Since I was six, baby. I was born into this life. I was born into it. Bird and bite. Was a bird? Was that a parakeet?

No, that was my... I've been telling you since the time I can remember, Joe Liz, there's always been a bird with glasses on. That's why he loves Blue Jay Okes and so much. I do like Blue Jay.

I know you do. You fucking love it. You fucking love it. You fucking... Loving. There's something about seeing a fight, though, where you just get, there's something inside everybody. You just like, yeah.

You become an ape. Yeah, it's weird. You literally become an ape. You just want to watch. Yeah. Showing my teeth and shit. Me and Danny saw a fight right in front of Casa Bonita. Oh, yeah.

And the guy, the guy got the, the security guy got the other guy down. Oh, is this it? Is this the same? Yeah. Danny, you taped? Yeah. Danny, I just said if you're a comic who pulls out your phone to tape fights, you're a fucking low life.

He went, This tape is Bobby's. This is my tape. Oh, that's even better. Good job, Danny. You just shut up. You were going to be... No, I was going to raise my hands.

Bobby goes... Yeah, dude, he said, real crazy. Before Danny rated me, I was going to raise my hands. Bobby goes, now what you can't see is I'm behind the barrier. But I was tape. I was just like, hey, man, he's at... He's at enough. Stop.

I think it's weird for people to tape fights. I think it's weird for people to take pictures of people like on... It'll be like a person, like, sitting weird on the plane. And you take a picture of them. It's like, you show him their face. Buddy, listen, man, you got a clip farm as much as you can, bro. Didn't you just post a picture of a guy sleeping on your plane?

Buddy, this guy next thing. I'm talking about Bobby. The guy next to me. You're the problem, dude. Buddy. You don't give this guy a camera. The guy next to me. Bobby goes, hold on real quick.

There's a kid being abducted. I got to film this. Look, that kid's going right in that window this vein. I got to go viral. Buddy, I was sitting on the plane. Not that one. Still the other one. Not that one, dumb, dumb.

This guy was nuts. This is a different time you did it. On the way back. There you go. Not that one. Come on. Just get the thing, stupid. Who's doing this? We need Jamie. Come on.

The last one right there. What the fuck. Holy shit, that's crazy. I don't understand this. Explain that to me. And he's strapped in. He has the seatbelt on. I've been that hungover on a flight.

I have been that hungover. I won't. Is he doing like the Janet Jackson? Is he straddling the AC Slater? He's on his knees. He's on his knees. You're above you. I was going to watch a movie, but sure.

Explain to me what he's doing. This is real? I was sitting there. He's sitting there. It's coming back from Denver. I look over and he got on his knees. I mean, he did invent Facebook. He got on his knees and put his jacket down and just fell asleep.

Oh, he's on his knees on his... That's crazy. It's crazy. I mean, it is innovative. And crazy that you don't have first class. I mean, now, Comfort Plus. Rules. I know where it is.

Rules. It rules. I lost my Premier 1-C status. I don't know how. I fly nonstop. I lost my Premier 1-K status. What? Now,

Ununited? Ununited. And they made... State United to fucking... Go, go Delta. No, now, but now it's gonna be until like June until it re-ups. They took it...

They took it Comfort Plus. They made it zone 3. No way. Now... That's crazy. It was zone 2. That changed since Christmas because it was zone 2.

Well, I just go on freeboarding because they don't check. I just, now I'm just gonna play dumb until they call me on it. I just go on pre-boarding every time. I'm sitting there. I went and I fucking got him back. I thought, Zone 2, walked right up.

We're not boarding your zone yet. I went yet. I'm comfort plus. She goes, zone two. Zone two, zone two is now, is it Diamond and 360 or some shit? You don't get it's rebording? I'm diamond. I do.

With comfort plus, you're supposed to get, you will always zone two. Let me stop. Zone two is not pre-boarding. Pre-boarding is right after the baby. You're on United. Yeah, you're not. We do it. Delta does it different.

Delta does. You're cheap-de-po. Assistant needing, needing assistants getting sat. Zone one. Army. Yeah. First class, which is zone one. First class is zone one on.

So on United, Zone 2 is shit. First class is usually the group 1. Yeah. Preboarding is you get for Premier 1 guy. I get to go right up to the babies. Also, we have to wait for handicapped, babies, military. I thought it was cool.

And that was great. Hold on. Hold on. The guy came up. One military guy goes, can we please have a round of applause for a military? And everybody in the airport started to applaud the guy. I did love that.

And they called babies, little people, little humans. He goes, anybody's a little human. After Zone 2. Also, Diamond used to be Zone 1 two years ago. Yes. Yeah. Yes. Diamond was the thing I was the most proudest of

outside of my TV credits. I was like, dude, because you, early on were like, get an American Express and go Delta. You said Diamond and Danny's ears perked up? He goes, what have you talked about? He goes, And how many of you have? That's not what is that Diamond.

He goes, how did you know I was hiding one in my throat? That's what I was joking. That's fucking great. Did he wake up like, do I miss the snacks? Can I say it is, I think it's weird to take a picture of a guy's face to post you a master box? How do you not fucking take a picture of that?

I would have locked his face out. Or put an emoji, like a poop pet or something. Well, I should have did that. Because honestly, if I would have done that, if I slept like that and I go,

listen, there's this trick I do or sleep or a like reverse cowgirl. It's actually not even a bad idea. It's a terrible idea. It's innovative. Your knees are on the fucking floor of an air. Be a human being. You're an adult.

If that was a two-year-old, I'd be fine with it. That's a fucking 37-year-old man. That is a toddler. But if he's crazy hungover, I would give him a pass. But you've got to go like this, yo, bro. I'm going to do this right now. I hope you don't mind. Yeah, I go, hey, it's either this or I throw up.

Yeah, fine. Let me know. You don't just fucking rogue. That's, I agree. And everybody else, no one else on the plane even acknowledged it. No. Yeah, because everyone else is minding their business because they're all adults. Yeah, dude, that's not an adult.

That's a five-year-old. The biggest problem is. Seep out. What if you need to go to the bathroom? I can't. You step on his back and leap over it. No, you wake him up. If you go to the bathroom,

you go ahead. Can you stop soaking that ghost's dick and move? I got to piss. This is wild. This is fucking wild. That is a grown toddler. That is a toddler.

That is a toddler bullshit move. That's really funny. I was talking about Bobby in both cases. Yeah, it's really funny. You could have, we had the seat in the middle. He could have been like, dude, I'm fucked up.

I'm going to use this seat. I'm going to cannonball these two seats. I'm going to sit here and then leave this way. He was on the aisle? he was on the aisle. He had the middle seat he could have asked for. I can't get comfortable. I never can sleep on a flight.

I just got a great idea. This is, like, dude, videos are you popping up in the wild of look at this guy tried to fight me when I woke up? He's like, because I was dead asleep,

you fucking slut. I would have been more comfortable if he leaned on me and could I just sleep on you? It's crazy. I would have been like absolutely. Also, can I just say face towards you? Wildly aggressive.

What did that? Do it? Doing that. Come on. Everything that way. I feel like you're staring at me the whole time. It was fucking. I'd be playing my steam deck on the flight like this.

Was he hung over? Didn't seem hungover. Day after the Super Bowl, I would hope. Probably. Maybe. Maybe. No, it was the day before. Oh, yeah, you're on Saturday.

Sunday morning. We were flying back. Yeah, crazy. Then I looked over at one point he had all his stuff on and his hat, just sitting there like this. I was like, there's something fucking up with this dude. So let's shame him publicly to hundreds of thousands of people. Dang.

Let's get carried away. I'm not fucking Matt Wright. There's a hundred people that saw it. If I was getting buried by the algorithm. That's crazy. That was nuts. Imagine being that guy, though, and this picture comes up on your algorithm, and you go.

Well, he was scrolling through his shit at one point. I'm like, oh, please don't let this happen. That's what I'd fight, fistfight you right there. That happened to Florentine. Florentine was on a plane, trashed it, and the guy goes, I'm a fan, man. He followed him. Bruttle.

It came up. He was talking about what a fuck. I don't know what you say, but sometimes I'll see people like watching Rogan or Kill Tony on a flight and I do a lot of this like, oh, what do you want? My face?

No, just give him my face like. There you go, both angles. I had a lady watching Louis special 2017 next to me. And at the beginning, I introduced him and we hug. And I wanted to be like, hey, that's me. That's fun.

But you didn't. No. But it is weird to watch yourself next to the person. My Uber driver was listening to Godfree's podcast. Really? On Gas Digital.

As a gas digital subscriber, and I couldn't let go. I was like, that's my network. He's like, whatever, buddy. I don't go Brooklyn. I don't go Brooklyn. I don't care. He has no idea what a network is.

This is my network, cash a credit. Nobody even pays attention to what network the show was on. Why are you talking to you? Podcast Network, that's a bad idea. 2026. I was a child soldier. You could do it yourself. I never understood, even at the beginning of podcast, what the network means.

There is no office. There is no broadcasting license? It's not on a channel. It's just a thing. What are you doing? They should all be independent. There's no benefit whatsoever to podcast network. Unless you're lazy.

You're stealing money from these people, yes? How do you get your hand in everything? You take money from this man. Oh, I understand. That's like when I take the long route. He just takes a big sip of body brain. Yeah, he goes, oh, I like you. You are taking money from this man.

You are smart. I am not running the meter. All the money goes to me. Oh, fuck. Ah, shit. How do we blow the show up? Let's blow this show up. What are we going to do?

It's got a big guest in here, huh? Stop with the guests. Let's go to the fight. Let's go to the fight that Bobby Day. Yeah, this was crazy. The guy, I actually found out the end, the security guy was using his glasses to hit the guy in the head.

I just love seeing Colorado trash, like a girl in a tight... Hold on with a girl of a tight shirt and two long basketball shorts. Probably yelling for her boy... The neighborhood that this place is in is fucking bad. Yeah, it's a tough neighborhood.

It's a tough neighborhood, dude. It's bad. That shopping mall, half the stores are closed. Always has been. Even back in the 70s? I don't think it's off federal. It's like...

It was like... Why would they put it there? Because it was a cheap-ass Mexican restaurant where they just had a giant indoor diving thing in like caves. It was perfect for birthday parties. It was perfect for people

that couldn't afford Chucky Cheese. You'd go to Casa Benita. Right. Or if you couldn't go to Discovery Zone. Let's watch this. Or shout out big fun. Also turn the camera sideways so we can see it.

Oh, man. Can I tell you good drive block by the guy, though? Yeah, it gets under. It's security. Well, it escalated fast. Security is a black guy or the black guy. Security's black guy.

Black guy. White guy holding him in a childlike hug. They were trying to get out of my Damn, dude, hoodie and shorts, vaping, you would think this is in Aurora. This is Danny's, not mine. I'm in the video. Terrible. And then Danny panics.

Yeah, because the guy, look at him, he was like, he does that. He goes, so I was looking at prices of things in the area. This is when I was talking to him like, hey, it's enough. Let it stop. He's had enough. Black dude's cowboy boots. Welcome to Colorado. Yeah, he was a black dude to cowboy, but he got him down the ground.

I love it. This is making me miss home. As soon as someone goes down on the ground now, he went like this, I can't breathe. And everybody went, Oh no We were like, let him go, let him go. Yeah. That's the uncle.

That's the new tab. That's the new uncle. I can't breathe. They go, all right. Let's go. Hey, you, I don't need fucking cities marching on me. Oh, I'm so glad that I don't have as fat of a roll in the back of my neck as I used to.

You got one brain roll. I got one little, little breakfast sausage. You got a thinking roll. I used to have a pack of hot dogs. Is the video done? That was the whole video. Danny panicked.

I'm so sorry. That's what you're not here. That's it. Danny panicked. No, Bobby said call 911. Yeah, no, the guy was... I stopped the video to call 911. Yeah, it was getting too crazy. Well, he called 911.

First of the, it's not even crazy. No, it was getting crazy when he takes him down. He started choking him. He put a reverse on him. So, Bobby, you should call 911? Well, at this point, when he took him down... Bobby's filming. You could also see Bobby filming.

Can you see that? Go right here and see his phone. Yeah. What is that? Is that you? That's your leg, dude? It's definitely you. It's you.

It's you shake... Dude, I thought Patrice was knocking from the other side from our seance. Wait, I'm so confused by this. I don't see anything happening. What's the rest of the video? That's the whole video? I want your video, Bobby.

I want to see what you're filming right there. Yeah. Well, they go behind the thing, and then I put it down. Do you have a better video? I gave it to Dan. Danny has it. Why don't you play the better video, Danny? I don't see anything 9-1-1-4 here.

Danny, my sweet boy? Do you have a better video? Danny, my sweet Jesus boy? Fucking God. Anyways. It's terrible. Yeah, that neighborhood's fucked. You're a rat.

Cosset. You're a rat. What do you mean? Damn. Viotaping, and calling 911, calling the cops, taking a picture of the guys.

You were in a wire? Checking for a rat. There's a fine line. There's a fine line between clip farming and being a rat guy. Content created. Look it, I put the phone down when I was like,

this is the line. Someone might get hurt. Rat Bobby. And you're ratting out the security guy, not even the criminal. Bobby always comes with a florist van outside. And you go, are there an FBI agent today?

Listen to us, Bobby. What is you saying a little out of a bathroom? He goes to the bathroom. He goes, Can't do this. They fucking know me. Bobby the rat. This hoop is miced up.

I never know you were such a fucking rat, dude. He's going to be like, hey, after the podcast, he meets with three guys in suits outside. Not bombed. No. We were laughing at our own thing. I know, but I caught the wind of that. If you want it, you want to beg for it. Hasn't been a lot of bombs today, to be honest.

No, we've been doing pretty good. Good show. Really, we haven't thrown that bomb Dan at all. Dan had one, but we were all very nice about it. Like some kind of act out Bail don't get caught with Dan Loolew again. You don't want to get the damn loop. Dude, I'm telling you, you got to let me run into free space, not a loop.

Why were you mad? You were mad just because it was a little, at the beginning of it? No, I didn't like that no one told us. I think that's like, come on, man, there's four of them. And that the cameras are even rolling, let alone. I was just like, you can't record us without knowing. You were saying something crazy. I don't think they would have put it out.

Yeah, but it's somewhere. But honestly, Lewis, it's one of these fucking. I love those guys. They would be like, no. I didn't realize you saying that. Dude, if one of these autistic get a problem with us and they have you doing something and they got it, we're fucked. Yeah. And they do.

Yeah, they do. I mean, they have a saying crazy shit. Oh, you mostly, but yes. That's okay. I've the edit. Every time he says something. And then I go, oh, me. And it goes back to you and the Bobby.

But Lewis isn't the problem because Lewis always says crazy shit. The problem is nice boys like us being like, you know who I hate the blacks. And then they got that. Clip that. Clip that. What? Clip it. Clip it.

Lip it. That's a great. I love the dude, literally the intro for the day his episode, it needs to be Joe going, you know who I hate the black. Boom. A million. Why are you so tan? I know. You look good. You look great. You look really. I'm telling you right now,

whole outfit. You got defensive for a second. You thought he was trashing you? Yeah, he did. Yeah, I saw him move. I saw him like shake I don't know. I looked tan. Why you look so tan? What do you got? What do you mean? What are you doing? What are you doing? some therapy? Red light therapy? What are you doing? No, I don't do anything. I go to the steam room.

What are you fucking? I did yoga yesterday. I had a blood rush to your head. You look good. By the way, how much is he looks tan? He looks good. I've been outside a little bit. I don't know.

I mean, I've been here. I like this shirt. Thank you. This is, uh... And we haven't had sun in New York in two months. Yeah, we've been living... We've been living under the cold dome. Yeah, but it's like Wisconsin sun where you go outside and it's just to see your breath.

But it is sunny every day. It's just freezing. It sucks. It does suck. We went out. I'm at the point. I walk back to the bus. I walk back to the bus.

And my nose hairs froze. When that feeling sucks. It sucks, but it is kind of cool when you do it. My dog has this thing because in New York City, all the snow is still here, and it's all just like ice. My dog will refuse to poop on the sidewalk. She has to climb on these fucking snow banks.

Like a stage and just shit in front of everybody on 6th Avenue, and I'm like, hold on, Danny. It's like, did you say bank? He goes, well, she should be depositing. I love the back. I love it. Through the muck. It is cool that it's just cold when you dog shit.

It immediately just free. Yeah, it's not as hot. Oh, I love it. I wait, I wait two hours, I come back out. I fuck it, it's like a rock. But also, she's, she's looking to me like, usually she wants to stay out on walks and she's looking at me. She's like, yeah, fuck this shit.

No, my dog goes out into the backyard for like, she pees, poops right away, comes right back inside. Once in a while, she gets excited. So my whole backyard is just like snow, like a foot of snow with a sheet of ice over it. So she's so cute and, like, small. So she'll run and she'll just slide across the yard. It's so adorable.

She tries to, like, run back and she starts slipping, and then she spins. Rules. She's a cute pup. She's cute. How old is she? Four months. Oh, my God.

Old is the relationship. Whoa, is she house trained? Almost. She has... No, she pissed on the floor. Yeah, but that's a nir. That's a piss pop. That happens the first year.

When she gets excited, she's a little peek-in-s-downs. I do the same thing. We used to tell people we judge them by if Mertl pissed when she saw them. Because it was like during COVID, if they came over and we were like, hey! And Mertel was like, you're like, dude, you got a piss pop. It's pretty big. Sport never got over it. sport just any time.

It didn't even, it could be, it could be us. Yeah. It could be anybody that he encountered ever who's just sort of pissing. Right on their shit. First time I left for the road.

So people to get the piss pot with shit people? Yeah, we were like, oh, we'd bring it up. We go, you didn't get a piss pot. First time I went on the road and came back. She was like,

I came home and she was like, she's like very attached to me. This dog, I mean, I can't, dude, I had to jerk off this morning and fucking, this dog. Flind is up? No, she,

she can't let me go on the bed. So it's her like, Like her at the bed, going, whoa, whoa, oh, to try to help a belt me. And you're just sitting, beating my dick. Jesus Christ, I couldn't handle it. He's just, Dad, I need it. And you go, oh, I need it. I put doodles in the other room.

Shut the door and just here. Yeah, dude. Hey, myrtle, grow a thumb, because I'm getting a nut. That's hot, because you can pretend it's the girl trying to climb up. Yeah, I go, I have you captured miss. I can't come unless I hear whimpering. And Lewis goes, oh, turns out I've been missing this my whole life. Do we just find the video?

Oh, here it goes. Oh, he is a methamphetamine unit. Well, they were yelling and screaming at each other right here. Oh, this is the security guard on the bike. Yeah, no, no, no, no, that's just a dude on a bike. Yeah, look at him. This guy's a problem. Yeah, he is a problem.

And the security guy's trying to go back in. Yeah, yeah. This guy's just a fucking junkie. Yeah. But he's dressed like he's like a monk. Look, this guy's can't fight at all. His hands are down by a side. It's a problem.

I think he tried to. He turned us back to him, too. Yeah. No, no, too, Duffy. Is he trying to methamphetamine reason with him? Do we get some volume for this? Yeah, he was trying to... I think the guy tried to steal bread.

And he threw him out of... I would rather starve than eat your bread. Like Jean Valjean? Oh, he's... Yeah, for real. It's just Les Mizz. Look, monsieur. Where all the children play...

I love it. I like it. Keep going. I've never seen... I was going to be able to hit that note. I've never seen... Oh, you don't know that. Black guy throw a haymaker there. Yeah, they started...

They started throwing them. punches. This is a much better video. Danny's trying to be a videographer. He's not a clip farmer. Fucking asshole. Oh, the girl squeaked, which meant someone who went behind the pole. Nice. I got pretty close at this. Well, the children

probably goes, if I get close enough, I can feed one of them. I went back. Oh, here you go. This is great. This is good. Get out of the way, you're flat ass. Oh, my God. Look at those back handles. I went to high school with this girl. Oh, they both are too high. You got to get low there. This is the part where... Oh, they're both kind of black. This is where, no, he's white.

He's just got... It's like dirty. Yeah, he's dirty. They're both dirty. Somebody call the cops. Oh, that stinks. Nobody call the cops. What happened in the fight? I don't have my wire on me. Bobby the rat.

I'm not Wyatt today. Because I stopped filming here, but the guy got him down and was choking him, and he was, he goes, the dude on the bottom goes, you got my blood, man. You got my blood. Oh, geez. And I was like, dude. And then he started choking him. He's like, I can't breathe. And then the crackhead. The crackhead. But

then the guy was choking him. This happens in fights. The guy, the crackhead dude, flipped him on his back. And I was like, dude, now this, but he got back up, thank God. You remember Wayne Previd? You know who Wayne Previd is? Yeah. Yeah. All right. He was fighting a guy,

this crackhead in 7-Eleven in L.A. And the guy wouldn't leave him alone. So he hit him. Then he went to kick him, broke his ankle. fell in pain and all as he remembers he goes all as I felt was something climbing up my body the homeless guy climbed up his body and went right nose to nose you I got you now motherfucker oh no oh dude imagine a homeless guy just spit in your mouth right there like you feel like

sigourney weaver and aliens a little mouth is on you go that's why fighting sucks you never know what anything could happen oh he goes this why you don't let your friends fight you stop them from running outside and fighting or you wear a wire and make sure that the feds are there To make sure The rat Joe, the bird Or when somebody is leaving And it goes, Meet me outside

You go, yeah, all right And then you go What a fucking You go like this Can I get another one? Lunatic Another one for me and my girlfriend Who are in here drinking

You go yeah My child girlfriend That I barely know More and more for my lady bride She's just licking her ring pop She goes I heard

If you go outside He might fight you And he goes I've got two gongs You're that drunk Puerto Rican from the bar. Louis is probably seeing a devil. It is so fun throwing you shit there. I've got two gardens, one full for each of you.

By the way, they look like buddies here. I'm just saying I missed you, man. And the security guy's holding a Sharpie, which is also... No, those are his glasses. He was using his glasses as a weapon. He did one of these where he goes, now my brother, I'm going to take off my reading glasses. Yeah.

And then he took a... That's a pen, I think he has. He was taking out anything to... That other guy's a problem. problem, though. He was actually pretty beefy and big. He's also on drugs. Did he steal a loaf of bread? The bread's right on the ground behind him.

Just fucking push him away, grab the bread and dip. I'd just let him have the fucking bread. He was trying to get away. The security guy was trying to get away. Let him have the bread, but not the dip. No, no, he can't. Come on, man. Yeah, I would never fight in fucking cowboy boots either. Look at that. I mean, somebody's stealing bread like, I'd feel bad.

I would just pay for the bread. I'm like, dude, just fucking give him the $2 for the bread. You know, what did you steal? Would you steal watches? First of all. Bread? It's the dollar store. It's a dollar bread. It is just, first of all, why does the dollar store even have security? That's crazy.

Why do they have bread? How do they afford a security guard? Trust me. They have to sell thousands of items. That neighborhood, dude, they have security like a prisoner. Trust me. I tried to go to a dispensary by where I grew up and we're driving, because, you know, we drive from New York, so we're driving in.

I was like, oh, we'll go through Aurora. I'll show you where I used to go to this record store. And we pulled in, I was like, Angela's records. This is my record store. And there was a dispensary next door, and I got out of the car. and immediately got back in, Katie was like, what's up? I was like, shit was crazy outside the dollar store. It just like, you're walking, the dispensary was right next door,

and there's just dudes outside going, hey! You're like, okay, I don't want to fucking, I don't want to go buy fucking weed. That fucking area is creepy, man. Yeah, that's way different than where I grew up. Yeah, the birds changed in that area. It's fucking nuts. Yeah. Joe, you okay?

You're with us? Yeah, what happened? Come on. Come on. Come on. You're all right. Someone die? Come on.

What happened? How many seats you sold this? weekend? Damn, Bobby's in roast mode. I'm sorry. Sorry, Bobby's performing for the guys in the van. Bobby's like, is that good? He goes, hey, hey, I heard Kirk's, I heard Kirk laugh in my fucking earpiece. I sold out a small theater.

We added the second show, and that's almost sold out. That's good. What theater? What theater? It's called the littlest theater in Canada. We're like, oh, we're real happy to have you. My numbers are off the charts this weekend. San Fran, Vancouver.

No, there's a guy, I'll tell you guys. The place in Vancouver. The Rio Theater, and then the Biltmore Cabaret. Which I think is in the ghetto. I don't know where I'm doing it. I'm finally going to Vancouver. Vancouver fucking rules. It's great for comedy.

It's one of my favorite cities in the world. A lot of people that look just like that guy. I love Vancouver. It's like a mix of... Great food. Of Denver and Seattle. Very Japanese. A lot of Japanese shit.

And Joe can speak it fluently, as we just witnessed. Haleigh. Yeah, it's like city and mountains right there. The mountains are beautiful. The water. The water. Stanley Park, dude. I fucking take a walk in the pack.

Are you guys want to wrap it? Yeah, I got it. Bobby's got a wire and Joe's a bird. Hey, hey, hey, my name is Joe. That hurt my feelings and I got to let you know. Speaking for himself is what Adam taught him. Okay. I'm on the truck.

All right, guys. We'll see you guys next time. Tell a friend. Tell a friend. For God's sake. Show this. If you're on a road trip with some friends, Throw on the regs.

Toss on the regs, baby. Make sure you go see us live and come up and tell us your fans. And I'm going to be clip farming all weekend. So we'll see you guys next time. On the regs.