Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - The Walk Off | The Regz w/ Robert Kelly, Dan Soder, Luis J. Gomez and Joe List Ep #35

Episode Date: April 16, 2025

Robert Kelly, Luis J. Gomez, Joe List, and Dan Soder discuss Bobby’s house losing power, Katy Perry screaming in space, Joe’s age game, Bobby leaving the show, the future of the REGZ, and more! Presented by YKWD and GaS Digital. LISTEN ON APPLE PODCASTS https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-regz/id1700969607 SOCIALS Robert Kelly @ykwdpodcast https://robertkellylive.com/https://www.instagram.com/robertkellylive/ Luis J. Gomez https://luisofskanks.com/ https://www.instagram.com/gomezcomedy/https://twitter.com/luisjgomez Joe List https://twitter.com/JoeListComedy https://www.instagram.com/joelistcomedy/ Dan Soder https://www.dansoder.com/ https://www.instagram.com/dansoder/  SPONSORS  Cornbread Hemp Get 30% off your first order w/ code "REGZ" MANDO Get 40% off your starter pack with code “REGZ” ExpressVPN Use code “REGZ” to learn how to get up to 4 months free Sheath Use code “REGZ” to get 20% off your first order Small Batch Cigar Use code REGZ10 for 10% off plus 5% rewards Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You're listening to the Gas Digital Network. What's up everybody? It's the regs. I'm Robert Kelly. That's Joe List. That's Dan Soda. And Luis J Gomez is right over there staring at my head going, what are you doing man? You beautiful head. What are you doing man?

I'm sorry that I got to keep everyone on the fucking straight and narrow. Shut up. No, but you have to do nothing. Just talk. I keep them on the straight and narrow. That's what do? That's why I've always called you the sheriff of the regs. You gotta keep your boys on the straight and narrow. I go, uh-oh, law's in town. Bobby's not fucking, Bobby's not straight or narrow. Bobby's fat.

Bobby's gay and fat. Come on, folks. Bobby's frustrated right now. I'm not. I might have to go. You're in a mood. There's no electricity in Katona right now. Apocalypse? What are might have to go. You're in a mood. There's no electricity in Katona right now. Apocalypse. What are you going to do?

You're going to go fucking Wolverine and grab two fucking chargers? Give me the wires. I had a generator. I had generator that was Deadpool 2, 3, by the way. No, it was Wolverine and Deadpool. Deadpool, Wolverine, not Wolverine by itself. Get it right.

That was an unnecessary correction. No, it was not. I'd love when you guys heard. Deadpool Wolverine not Wolverine by itself get it right Unnecessary correction no was not I'd love And then he came in and saved the day at the end. It's a great film. It's a great film I love you when you guys have this blackout all day. He's in a mood. We had I'm gonna tell you telling us Why I'm telling you why you keep talking. He's having a hard time. My family's in danger, man From boredom I swear, I swear to God. They got no screen time, dude. Dude. Well, no, there's no electricity.

I had a generator put in, thousands of dollars, and she doesn't know how to fucking turn it on. All she has to do. Women, am I right? Yeah. But you don't know how to turn her on. Whoa! That's what I do.

Black guys. Yeah, blacked out. She's just getting, there's just five black guys at Bobby's house banging his wife. You guys have had a blackout all night. Yeah, blacked out. She's just getting, there's just five black guys at Bobby's house banging his wife. You guys have had a blackout all day. You misunderstood her. That face is so funny. I fucking kill you.

From you. From me? I feel for you. I wear a phone. I care about you and I feel for you. By the way, that's the most efficient way to make me feel like shit is I go, but I didn't, but I. Not from you, Dad.

Not from you. So, anyway, she's calling the guy, I mean, call the, Dad. Not from you. Expected better from you. Anyway, she's calling the guy, I mean, call the guy, he'll tell you. And she calls me back, she's like, he's gonna walk me through it, but I just wanna sit through. Yeah, he is. You're right, I'm sorry, that is his flavor. That's his flavor.

That's not what I do. She goes, I'm just gonna sit in the dark. I'm like, I... What a, that's a fight. That's a fight, she's just prepping for a fight. She wants to sit on the dark. You misunderstood her once again. Oh, okay, sorry You picked up right where I left off once again. Yeah, you're dirty

So our max and her just sitting there telling stories even home. He's staying over some fucking why they have electricity It just went out Battery Park City babies lit up it was made of batteries It was fun to watch you hit late. That's good. You got Joe, by the way, you watch Joe process it. These guys all, you gotta move here, you gotta move there. You can't come in the morning. You got no lights. You're away from everything and now looks what happens. I didn't come this morning because I had to pick up my new truck. Oh, is right. What kind of truck are're talking it is a lariat ranger bring it up

Larry at 20 25 John Larkin highest Graded nightclub the John Larkin trucks the John Larkin. It's a gray haired. It's close cause I swarming What am I gonna do well the truck no home. Damn, that's a cool truck. Let me see. I love how you and Big Jay have trucks. You guys are fucking compensating for your tiny dicks. Damn.

I've had a truck for three years, stupid. You dumb tiny dick. Don't lump me with that fucking tub of shit. Big Jay's a cool guy truck with flames on the side. He's like... He has a truck with flames? Not only is He's like, he has a truck with flames? Not only is he a truck, he has the baddest, he's got the Ram, he's got the Ram truck.

Bring that one up. It has a screen, not only a big screen here, he has a screen on the dashboard, so the person sitting in the seat can watch Netflix on the dashboard. Isn't that dangerous? Not for the person sitting in the seat that did. But wouldn't you look over?

No, why would you? I don't know. Depends on what what they're watching it's a good show staredevil born again the regs maybe Tim Dillon's new special check it out new season of love on the spectrum people kissing that's gonna distract you yes how can I not you wanted to see that you look in your mirror Those mean today Bobby can't talk I'm trying to get a Perfect as always

Why don't you leave us alone and we will Bobby should have the floor I mean you're going through serious stuff There's a reason you're upset. You got some serious doesn't care about anybody but himself That's that's actually fucked up. You anybody but himself. That's actually fucked up. You don't care about my family. My son could be in the dark with my wife. Your son is going like that. You should be saying right now, dude let's go. We nigga go save them. We nigga go? What did you just say? We nigga go save them? He's going, daddy!

Daddy it's dark and mommy is scared! Don's going, where are you, Bobby? Help! And you're going here, you're going, I like Lucy. I should go and save my camera. What could you do? I could go turn the generator on. We put a good effort in.

Put this out, the people will be happy an episode came out. We put in a good four minutes, let's get out of here. We did the reads. Tell Don to light some fucking candles. Tell her to read a little bit. She doesn't have candles. Why won't you tell her to read? Tell her to tell a spooky story with a flashlight under her face. I mean that'd be almost fun. If the lights went out, the electricity is out. First we say

the N word, now we're saying spooky. Can we clean it up? Joe, your brain is going there. We're talking about an electrical outage. Here's why I'd say go. You should learn how to fire. She should learn how to do it. Yeah, I agree. You should try to teach a man to fish, bro. Yeah. Well, learn how to do it. Make her sit in the darkness and go,

you can figure this out. But encouraging. Darko. Also, she has a phone. She could just fucking Google. Phone's not working. Verizon's out. How'd she call you?

Verizon's out? CB radio. That's a lie. No. This is a lie. Dude, we were talking more as hosts. Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. This is Big Mama Dee. Big Mama Dee. call you that's Verizon's CB radio. It's a lie. We're talking more. Big mama D. Big mama D trying to find a big papa big papa B. I'm looking for used to be fat. We're looking at Google

how to turn their generator on this and not if you can't Google there's no internet. There is internet she has a phone. She's not 1985. There's no internet. She didn't fall into a wormhole. Verizon is 1985. There's no internet. She didn't fall into a wormhole. Bobby, Verizon is not out. There's no internet in the house. I'll sing it so maybe you'll get it. On her phone. Because I know it eases you down.

Is her phone dead? Her phone's dead. Her phone is alive. But it's not Verizon. This bit stinks. Yeah. Also, there's no reason why she can't Google. But it was kind of fun.

How is a generator, she can Google how to work a generator. She's got Google. Yeah, she's also got a Spanish guy who put it in that she should call. I bet she does. Yeah, I want a Spanish guy to put it in my wife. Why don't you stop talking about my wife's pussy like.

What? Why don't you have some respect for my wife's gash, man? Fuck's wrong with you, bitch. He goes, respect my wife's pussy. you're and you have been left alone in the dark for all of this time where's your husband he's not sorrow what is he doing he's a little podcasting podcast instead of being here with you you are so beautiful in the dark flower in the dark and you don't look Spanish in the dark. I am black I like it. I've always wanted one of you fucking spots is

Now has don't ever been with the brown person You've asked her though. Oh, yeah, that's boss. That's boss the first day. Why do you think I married her? That's how they meet Boston. I Sarah ever been with a black man? She and her family's from Africa. Yeah, no black guy. What? I was on a plane one time with a comedian who I won't say, because I don't want to get him in trouble,

but he was like full volume like, if my girl was with a black deal breaker. Verzi. Nick DiPaolo. It wasn't Nick, but obviously. Yeah, but obviously. Clearly. Yeah, I was right, but I was wrong.

But he was saying deal breaker so loud, and I was like, shut the fuck up. Paul and Quinn. I will never say, even if you guessed it. All right, but you'll tell me later. Yeah, of course. I think girls that like me also like black men. Yeah, of course.

That's the thing. But I don't see myself that way. We do. We do, yeah. We see you as- So does the bank. Loud, late. We see you as close to the bank. So does anybody giving you a load shit my pocket go downstairs my latte is here You ordered your own latte. Yeah, yeah Lemarana is my drivers you order you ordered a latte for yourself. I did I

Whole group I texted the entire and I've tried to get a tea, but I couldn't they're out Yeah the entire yeah and I've tried to get a tea but I couldn't they're out yeah Bobby's family's got to fight a bear tonight and you're over here ordering yourself a latte there's a gay guy trying to break into my house let me in bitch I mean you fight so you move in slut you like your backslash is you bitch I'm gonna fuck your keyholes I'm gonna fuck him fucking your key I love the way your microwave goes away when you push a button how big is your generator big go power your whole house no I got the one your microwave goes away when you push a button. How big is your generator big?

Power your whole house. No, I got the one that you can pull out so I can I bet you did We have a jiller ater at our house Instead of a generator got it. It's another female J name got it Yeah generator that seems Crazy, I feel like you would never need it except you did. What? Just fall asleep. Why is the electricity out? I don't know, why don't you Google it?

Why don't you tell your wife to Google it? She's got a phone. Why don't you fucking tell your wife to, oh, wait. Damn, he just called you lonely. Snap, back to reality. When he opened it, it goes crazy. Joy my penis. My unherpiest penis.

Wow. When are you gonna bring Joe into this? When are you gonna bring Joe into this? What? I like my herpes. He's the only one who has herpes in the group. Corpus. Corpus.

I'm just talking Spanish. I gotta get my wife on, I wanna come in later. Lejo, enjoy yourself. Was he good? Was he as good as me? Has it been delivered? What? Been delivered?

Has it been delivered? Now it says two minutes. It said it was here and now it says two minutes. I hope he dies. I hope he gets shot. I'm so furious they didn't have one. I'm drinking this bullshit. Cafe Reggio crap. I want Starbucks. The good stuff. The real shit.

So I think that if you just sit in the dark, what's going to happen? The fridge is going to go bad. Yeah, that's not what it used to be. First of all, the fridge is airtight so you got a good day. Yeah. You have a good day. Yeah, that's not what it used to be. First of all, the fridge is airtight, so you got a good day. Yeah. Like her pussy. You have a good day. Yeah. If you wait till you get home, you're fine.

Yeah. You can probably, we could probably do like a four hour. No, let's keep it nice and short. Why don't we go until she calls me and says I need you. I thought her phone's dead. Huh? Woo. I thought you said it wasn't.

Back on you. What? Huh? It's on you. My ear just, blood's just going to. Hold on, this guy's calling me, I think. Good. Put it on the air? It's on you Good put on the air put on the air Hello. Hello Yeah, yeah my guys coming down right now in front of my guy

Idiot my boyfriend. You're fucking queer. Are you in front of the Comedy Cellar? Going and do five come on in go ask Val if you can do five. Just leave it on the stairs. Go, hey Val, dance order said put me up next. Give it to my guys. My guys should be there. Your guys. How annoying is that? Your guy.

Oh, are you not in front of the, go to the Comedy Cellar. I think Uber puts it at like Mineta. Can you go in front of the comedy star? I want you to help me. I need you to help me. I think he's on Mineta. Hold on one second, he's coming.

He's on Mineta. Oh, our guy's back upstairs. Your guy, send your guy back down. Oh God, our guy's back upstairs. This guy's coming down, he looks like you. Don't trust the Filipino in snow pants. Shut up. And we're back

He's gonna throw my latte at the wall. Oh, he's I do who are you you are now, Lewis? Yeah, I feel a pinot in snow pants Never never trust a pinot in snow pants is he are you doing Irish story telling show I think I'm being bullied into it, but I don't think so. I don't have a story. I'm trying to get out of it. I don't know, man. I might do something with Shane. Are you doing it, Louis?

No. No, I have one story, but it's a closer of my next special that I'm filming in three months. Oh, in Tampa Bay, directed by Robert Bartholomew. But now I feel like he doesn't have my best interests in mind. Why? I don't know, there's some energy lately.

Oh, this is good. This is good for creative. I'm gonna say something to you right now. You're a fucking idiot. We just had a great week in Nashville together. I was kidding. We did shows together. I was joking.

I want an apology and I want it fucking ASAP. Comics don't apologize, bro. Yes you do. Yeah, God, I love it, dude. Mainstream media, you're getting good at not apologizing and the left is getting nervous. If you don't apologize right now, I'm gonna go home and save my family.

And make the show better? Don't apologize, don't apologize, don't apologize. Make the show better? Is that what you think? Oh, dude, I will get it. Is that what you think? I'm kidding. I can't apologize. Louis, if you do that, I'm forced to go downstairs and get a chicken Caesar salad to go and then go home and watch Daredevil Born Again while I eat my chicken Caesar salad.

I'm watching Daredevil Born Again, but here's the thing. I started watching it. It's so funny. I was watching it in the gym, and I found out afterwards that Aaron Berg is in a scene. They cut out his voice. So they used a black guy's voice. They full dubbed him.

But I wasn't. And an Italian guy. But I wasn't watching it, so, I thought it was Paco without my fucking. Hey. Hey bud. Hey man. This is Enjoy Your Order.

But I wasn't actually watching it. When I'm in the gym and watching stuff, and I'm half watching, half listening. Hey, dude, you're putting in the work. Yeah, say the gym again. Hey man. It says enjoy your order. But I wasn't actually watching it. When I'm in the gym and watching stuff and I'm half watching, half listening. Hey dude, you're putting in the work. Yeah, say the gym again. The gym. You're just in the gym putting in the work. Tell us when you're gonna go. You're just in your iron paradise disrupting.

I'm sorry Bobby that you're not in the gym. The gym orator. I go to the gym all the time. If you go to the gym you need a new gym. You need, I hope you fucking get fucked by a gym. Nice, I like that one. Thanks dude, love it, fucking queer. You should go home and save your family.

Yeah. I should go home and eat a chicken Caesar salad. Let's go, Joe you it. Fucking queer. You should go home and save your family. Yeah. I should go home and eat a chicken Caesar salad. Let's go. Joe, you want to go? Yeah, let's go. Let's leave. How's your fucking latte? I hope you put his dick in it.

Yeah, we know how that worked out. You had to cancel that one. I'm by myself. I'm with the second Niko. Great show. Still got twice the views of white people eating correctly. I'm dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead,

dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, damn, I love this. I did the numbers. Shut up, queer. Stop looking at other people's show numbers, you comparing douche. Yeah, this family's in the dark right now. I'm better than you. This family lives in the dark.

I'm better than you. What do you got? Are we sharing this or not? I thought we were sharing this, you fucking asshole. I got my wallet. What is that? It's a quad espresso with cream, a little bit. Damn.

Yeah. You guys want to be up forever. Is this espresso, or quad espresso? Yeah, it's a quad espresso. That's my drink of choice. Is that powerful? It's great. I'm gonna go with the black. I'm gonna go with the black. Damn. You guys wanna be up forever. Is this espresso or quad espresso? Yeah, it's a quad espresso. That's my drink of the choice. Is that powerful?

It's good, right? Is it good? Yeah. I drink your. I drink your espresso. I drink it up. So it's like chocolate. I've abandoned my joe.

Oh, I have herpes one, the lip one. Oh yeah, that's worse. I would much rather genital herpes than lip herpes. Well guess what? Now so does Katie. How is it? Great, it's very good. It's good, Joe. Burnt a little bit, itches, but it's fine. I go, yeah, I don't know. I turn around and then come back, I'm like, ahhh! Wait, what are we talking about? Aaron Berg is in a show, but they cut him in the south? You know Daredevil? Daredevil. Daredevil. It's episode two. Daredevil. Daredevil. Daredevil. Daredevil. Daredevil. Daredevil. Everyone talk over each other.

In episode two, there's a scene where Vincent D'Onofrio gets out of his. Are we doing this? I thought we were talking, he said talk over everybody. Vincent D'Onofrio gets out of his SUV and Ehrenberg plays a construction worker and he runs up and he goes, hey, you're the mayor.

That's the voice. But can you do the real voice that they cut out? He goes, hey, you're the mayor. And then he walks over and he goes, hey, guys, stop's the voice. But can you do the real voice that they cut out? He goes, hey, you're the mayor. And then he walks over and he goes, hey, guys, start working about it. And then they cut over and they have- Did you do the real voice when he did it? And then they cut over him going,

we'll get right on that. That's crazy. And it's dubbed over, like a Kung Fu movie. Did he know he was doing it? Oh, don't call you. I don't think so. I don't think he knew. Can we have the clip?

Can we pull up the clip? Let's go to the clip. I don't know if the clip is, it might be online. It's on Disney Plus. We don't have Disney. What channel is this on again? It's on Disney Plus. Disney Plus.

Disney Plus, I don't know. It is Daredevil Born Again. So then I started watching it. It's very good. Not realizing that there was an entire other, like three seasons. On Netflix, and it's a continuation. Five episodes in, I was like,

well I gotta go watch the old one now. So now I just started the old one, so I'm simultaneously watching the new one. Don't watch the new one until you've watched the old one. But you have to watch Punisher too. Well, the Punisher is a little break off after season two of Derrick. Punisher's a great, my favorite of them all.

He's unbelievable. He's back. He's a dude from... John Bernthal. He's back in... Never Ending Story. Never Ending Story! He played the dog.

That's hilarious, he did dog. That's hilarious. He did it. You silly goose. My family is in the dark. Walking Dead. What if they get robbed? What if it's a big thing where everybody's just robbing houses and killing people? Can I say my problem?

That would be so funny. Superheroes need to have superpowers. He does. Batman doesn't have superpowers. I know, but he's kind of like the one that I'm okay with it. First of all, Daredevil has a superpower not really Yes, no, he has fucking sonar like a bat but not really Dude, he can listen through walls

No, you can do this and he knows where people are He's got good hearing, that's his super power He's blind He's blind I know But he can sense everything He can sense, he's got See that? That one in the throne off there

That threw you off I know Threw off you big time Shut the lights out, daredevil grew up and fucking saved my family I thought daredevil was fast Daredevil. That threw you off. I know. Threw off you big time. Shut the lights out. Daredevil could go up and fucking save my family. Daredevil would fuck your family up. He's not that fast. He's normal fast. He's just like a ninja. Oh. What does he say? Enhanced agility and stamina.

Peek human strength and speed. You could shoot him in the fucking face and it's over. Master of martial arts. Billy club proficiency. Dude, the ability to detect lies. How much would that have helped you? What, he's my girlfriend? Got him. Got yourself.

Oh, someone's lying based on their heartbeat changes. Yeah. That's how he found out. I can hear their heartbeats. I don't want to give away what happens in episode eight, but, or episode seven. You know what's a really good show is Mobland with Tom Hardy.

Yeah, Tom Hardy's the best. What is with Tom Hardy though? He just like stopped acting in real movies and started making Venom and TV shows. Well, Venom probably is bottom of an island. TV show is directed by Guy Ritchie, which is great. That's on Paramount Plus. And this, the show is amazing.

I gotta watch it, I love, love me some time. He's the shit, he's one of the best. It's great. Yeah, I'm just sad that he's not making like film. This is, this movie, or TV show is like a movie It's got great. You'd love it great lips. Thank you. Thank you. No, no, no, you have a tiny little shitty mouth Wow, your lips stink my lips are nice. My mouth is small, but my lips are quite gonna trim your mustache Yeah, I don't like that. Hey Joe your lips

Lewis and Bobby are the lip heavy ones you know what I mean but don't you I didn't want to but it got me say it again Lewis say something about dawn again but say something about dawn again say it don't a nice woman yeah you got you damn it. Dawn's a nice woman. Yeah, he got you. God damn it. And she's in the dark, she can't even hear this. Yeah, what if she's like fucking, Daredevil. Daredevil, there we go. She goes, I heard it from the city.

Bobby's getting nervous, because Louis is complimenting me. If Dawn was blind the whole time, she has no idea what I look like. She touches your face, she goes, whoa, what? Because I thought you were Siamese, I thought there was two of you. She goes, oh boy.

That sucks. When a blind person- You're fat too. In the head, yes. I just lashed that out. Fat in the head's a good name for an alcohol. But, if she calls for your help, he has to go. Blind people touching your face

and thinking you're ugly has to hurt. Like they go like. Hey, I just. They feel your face, he has to go. Blind people touching your face and thinking you're ugly has to hurt. Like they go like. Hey, hey. They feel your face and they go, ooh. I'm hating everything right now, I'm having a hard time, okay. What'd she say, read it. Read it out.

Read it. I'm hating everything right now. Put her on speaker phone. Not your father. Your father, no. I am not your father. Your dadda. You're my dadda.

Just leave it. You're my dad. I Know you'll be home in an hour though You will be home in an hour. All right. No, he's an hour away. He'll be He'll be home in like two hours. No God. No Get the gun, okay, totally get the gun. the doors. Is Max over at his friend's house? Get the gun. Okay, they'll probably find him. Tell her to get the gun. I know, but they probably have candles and shit, right? You better hope not.

That means your boy's- At least talk into the microphone. Make it interesting for us. Yeah, that means- Why don't you shut your face? Why don't you do something about it? Why don't you shut up? I'll fuck you up.

Now it's interesting, pussy. Let's go. Yeah. Better hope Max isn't around anyone with candles. I love you, bye. That's grooming. She said you're a f- That's grooming. She loves me. She does love you, bye. That's grooming. She said you're a f***. That's grooming. She loves me.

She does love you, but not when I tell you what you said about her pussy. Dang. She's got heavy, heavy hanging pussy. I gotta imagine that the- I think she'll like the compliment in the Puerto Rican community. Yeah, well you're a f***ing-

James' ma has fat pussy lips too. Wow. You can't play with your f***ing mind. She's not in this, dude. She's not a player in the game. She's in it! She's not a player in the game anymore. She's in it, she likes blacks!

She tapped out. She tapped out of this game. She likes big black. She likes blacks! She tapped out. She tapped out of it. She likes big black... The electricity I imagine would be on soon. They must be working on it, right? Is it a falling tree? Not coming out until 12 o'clock tomorrow. 12 o'clock PM? Wait, so is this a scheduled disservice?

Is there another tomorrow? Yeah, there is another. There's a 12 AM. There is no tomorrow! Three hours. There is no tomorrow! Let's go though! What movie? Sunday Blues.

No. Saturday Night Night. Any given Sunday. There is no tomorrow! What movie? What movie? Sunday Blues. No. Any given Sunday. Any given Sunday. There is no tomorrow! Any given Tuesday. There is. JFK. Professional, the professional.

The Mighty Duck. Arthur II. Whoever gets it, I will give $20 cold hard cash to him. Alright, hold on, do it again. There is no tomorrow! Can we get some context? I gave it to you. Let's see, can we each get four questions?

Let's do a better acting. How about... Oh, Rocky IV. Nope. Rocky III. Rocky I. Rocky III. gave it to you let's eat can we each get four quads do a better acting how about rocky for no rocky three rocky one rocky three rocky what would you want me to give me fuck give me 20 bucks why the clip stupid fuck we don't need the clip come on the groove we're out of a groove playing horrible yeah we're watching other people do art instead of us go all right fucking snap your phone We're out of a groove. We're out of a groove. We're playing clips. Horrible. Yeah. We're watching other people do art instead of us making art. Let's go.

It's fucking snapping. Bobby, you took a phone call. Snap it out. You took a phone call. Don't get mad at me, stupid. You took a phone call from an Uber driver. It was funny. There was an African voice that Dan got to do.

You two are being weird. Yeah, you guys are being weird. No, you, Bobby, and Louis are being fucking weird. What am I being weird? My family's in jeopardy. I know, and I thought you should have told the story, but he interrupted you, made it weird. Of course, that's what he does.

I tried to step in. He just didn't care. They can't watch it. Now you're lashing back. The TV is off. Let's get it together. Come on. Either you're leaving to go fix the generator or you're here, you're with us.

Let me say something. I've been here. It's true. I'm a player. Joe? I've been here. Good job taking control. Lewis?

I've been here the whole time. Joe? You've been Lewising, but I can't have both whacking. What's with the new mic stands? I don't like them either. Well, you can't take your mic. I wanted to take my mic out and hold it. Mike keeps folding up. I hate it.

Wacky. Can I make an observation about this studio? Okay. There's too many changes. You guys got to just settle in. It's all good. This is good. It was good last week.

It was good a month ago. It was good six months ago. Look at it. You got these two fidgeting around like fucking jackasses that look at these two retards to two met changes This is like that scene in Apollo 13 where they start taking their bio Dude Mando is here the manly sense like bourbon leather Mount Fuji. Oh, I love dude. I'm not kidding. I Wear nothing but Mando now really yeah, I use Mount Fuji

It comes in a little blue tubular thing and I play with the baby I literally roll it to him like we pretend it's a grenade. I pull off the cap and I roll it and I go He loves it, but it's literally all I'm wearing it smells like a million bucks smell me. You can't smell me I can't do every day top to bottom and I have I swear to God and Max usually steals it all because he loves it, but it's literally all I'm wearing it smells like a million bucks smell me you can't smell me I can't every day top to bottom and I have I swear to God and Max usually steals it all because he loves it Because he loves it because you get the little squeeze thing you get the it's got no None of that dangerous stuff that makes you worry about later in life Well guess what Mando's starter pack is perfect for new customers comes with a solid stick deodorant creep to deodorant and two free products Your choice like the mini body wash or stick deodorant, crepe tomb deodorant, and two free products of your choice, like the mini body wash, or maybe deodorant wipes,

free shipping, and as a special guest offer for Regz listeners, new customers get $5 off a starter pack with our exclusive code. That's 40% off your starter pack. Just use the code REGZ with a Z at shopmando.com. That's S-H do com with code regs Melfresher stay dryer boost your confidence from head to toe with Mando with Mando. Here's a good topic Those rods went up in space. I heard about that. It was a Kardashian or something. Oh Soto already talked about it

We can't talk about it. I'm sorry soda. Yeah Good. Well, let's start talking about who gives a shit Yeah. Good. Well, let's start talking about who gives a shit. You guys want to talk about me? Perry. Katy Perry. Gayle, Oprah's girlfriend. Bennington, Gayle Bennington and Ron. No, Gayle, Oprah's girlfriend. What's her last name? Gayle.

I don't know. Oprah's girlfriend. And then- I'm out of touch. I don't know anybody. Who owns these mic stands? Cause I want to throw them at the wall. But then they came back that day. Is that right? They were in space for 11 minutes. The whole journey was 11 minutes. These goofy dips went to space and act like they actually did them.

It's 60 miles above Earth. But first of all, they're not like in deep space. They went up to like just where it touched the atmosphere and then came back down. That's still awesome though. It's wild, dude. That's fucking incredible. Dude, I get scared at a roller coaster. Who gives a shit about these cunts going to space? A lot of shit about cunts putting myself there. Wouldn't that be cool if we did a regs episode patreon in space yes

I was fixing pretty good we're back baby we have the money upside down they went all the way up and they scream my girls oh they did No man has ever screamed in space. Oh shit dude. Holy shit. What movie is that? Alien. Oh we can rape them. Give me another $20. Oh shit dude. It's gonna quit comedy. I'm just gonna keep on naming my quotes. Oh I created a really fun game. Okay. Do you guys want to play? Yeah. Okay you pick two celebrities and you try to guess who is older. Can we before we just move on from the space thing, can we just use the thing with you right now? You're all over the place. You're ADHD. You're fucking. No, I was sitting back in the cut while it was all sloppy and now I've got my head in the game. Let's stay with space. They

won't play your game. I'd like to see these bitches screaming in space. I haven't seen it. I haven't seen it either. Bobby's texting now. I hate watching videos on it. Shut the fuck up. You remember Bobby, what you would do to us if we texted back in the day? He would physically abuse us. He would physically abuse us. Hey, go fuck you, Dan.

Fuck you. Fuck you, really, and fuck you. My wife is texting me, suck your own dick. All right? All right, I'm gonna start texting now, too. Go ahead, I give a fuck. You can do it anyways. I don't give a fuck.

You can do it anyways. I don't have cans on. I just realized. Let's see. Let's see these dumb whores. Can we get some volume? Fucking douchebags. What are you freaking out?

It's your... The lights are out, Bobby. Who cares? Yeah, I do. It's retarded. Shut the fuck up. It's not even a real thing. I do.

The mic is out because you took the mic out. Why did you... Oh, shit. Suarez mic out. Suarez. Suarez, fuck you too. We are aggressive today. We're very aggressive. It's aggressive because of you. No, you're on a fucking.

No, you have no empathy for your friends. I don't have empathy for my friends. My lights going out. You don't have empathy at all for anybody. That's not true. For anybody. You're just saying things. You're just saying things.

That's what podcasting is. We just saying things you say yeah, you're right. You're just saying yeah, that's what podcasting is we just say things Why doesn't? Dan have a fucking microphone Phone that he had This is gay. Look at three fucking jackasses Joe stop being nervous. Help him. You're making fucking fat Suarez roll around on the floor right now. You know how difficult it is for him to get down there?

Joe Russell. He's talking to Joe Russell. Oh, God. Sorry, Suarez, you're not fat. Yeah, you are. I mean, you call everybody fat. You hurt people's feelings. I call the fat people fat.

I've never called Joe fat once. No, I'm not. You're fat. Yeah, you are. No, I'm not. You're fat. You're not in shape. You're okay. Bobby. You're fat. You're not in shape. You're okay.

Bobby. You're not good. You are actually fat. How dare you? You have birthing hips. You have birthing stomach. You do, you do. But I wouldn't say that to you.

You have a gut and tits. You have a fucking dumb hip. Oh shit, guess who's back in the motherfucking house. Guess who's back. Uh oh. Look at these goofy sluts. I know, they all brought shit up into space and kissed it. Why do you get mad at me?

Because you fucking, I don't like when you fucking get mean, dude. I don't like when you mean. You know what, it's fair. You're not a mean guy. That's his role. You're right. Do your role. You know what?

I do my thing, he does his thing, you be you. You're right. Thank you. I'm gonna take a little sip of this cherry lime. Have some fucking little, you know, heart. Bobby's being very aggressive tonight. I'm not being aggressive at all. Let's watch these sluts in space. I'm just sticking up for sip of this cherry lime. Have some fucking little you know heart Bobby's being very aggressive tonight I'm not being aggressive at all. Let's watch these sluts. Take it up to my family in front of you So I'm singing for your family. Nobody's yes. I am attacking your fight. Why don't you move on?

Have you said people do attack Bobby's family? Yeah, he did. It's all your fault. I know you have something to do Your He's going outside. His sister just on him. Your aunt's in the back just tapping her nails on the glass. I, I play it. These girls scream. One, two, three. OK. Ace of space. What does that mean?

Ace of space? I really wish that. The ace of space. How great would it be if that thing exploded? Oh, did you guys see Bezos? A hole gets busted in the side and they're sucked out. Alien laser. Did you guys see Bezos eat shit when he was trying to run,

get his hot girlfriend out? When? He fucking face planted. Let's go after this slutty. I want to hear them scream. I want to hear them scream. And then Katy Perry sang. Oh, god. to hear them scream. It's so good. And then Katy Perry sang. Oh God.

I rolled that on off the video. Great. Thank God. Good job. We lost power. Can we call this episode chaos or power down or out of power? How about,

say something mean, guys, say something mean. I got something to say. You were about to say something fucking mean. I was not gonna say nothing mean. Yeah you were. You guys are about to kiss. Why are you being so gross? Why are you? Why are you being so cruel? You guys are really about to do something fucking mean. I was not gonna say nothing mean. You were. You guys are about to kill. Why are you being so cruel? Why are you?

Why are you being so cruel? You guys are really about to kill. Why you gotta be so cruel? Who? Who? What do you think of that? There we go. Welcome to space.

Hi, I'm Dan. If you're hearing this, we're all dead. Go ahead, play it. Play it. Let's play the clip. It's an 11 minute long clip, I have to find that. Ah, fuck. Oh my God, just jump out around.

All you have to do is play, girls scream in space. Yeah. The only time, this only time they've been on fucking space. Lobster tube? It's on lobster tube, Look for chicks yelling in space. I haven't been to lobster tube in a hot minute. Go back.

X video, X N X X. No, go to lobstertubes.com. Someone's on the phone. Joe, you on the phone? No, lobster tube. I haven't been to lobster tube in a minute. So I'm looking at lobster tube. You were looking at your phone, dude.

You were looking at your phone. I know, I'm trying to set up the next segment. Nah, dude. It's important. We're gonna put our phone dude. You're looking at I know I'm trying to set up the next segment I do what is it? We're gonna put our phones away because I feel like this is actually cause I have I have to have my phone Screams because your wife's in the dark who it's just not a real emergency. I'm sorry. I have empathy you have no empathy Have empathy for you fucking people that suppose oh dawn you're in the dark What if like tomorrow you're like, dude she got fucking murdered.

Yeah, what if she got murdered? She got dark poisoning. You go, oh no. Can I say something though? That landed pretty fucking hard. Yeah. Like a lot harder than I thought. Ooh, what was that?

Their shoot. They farted. Queef. Queefs. It really fucking shows shit. I mean, he's just showing us footage of. I don't. Yeah. He really fucking shows shit. I mean, he's just showing us footage of. I don't even know. Paco, talk to us.

There's so many and they're all. Don't scream at us, just talk in the microphone. All these videos are like 10 minutes long and you want me to find a small part. Passive aggressive. Wow. It's good for a producer. I'm trying to stand for it.

That's my fault. I'll take the blame because I'm Paco's boss. Yeah. So you know what? I'm sorry. Now I will apologize. You know'll take the blame, because I'm Paco's boss. Yeah. So you know what? I'm sorry. Now I will apologize. You know what? There's nothing funny about what Paco just did. You're not the step boss.

You're the boss that stepped up. What the fuck is that? Yeah. I wish Bobby would do step ups. Get rid of those tits. I wish you'd step off a building. That's fun. Joe?

Yeah, I don't know. We should never do this at night. No, this is last night. Nighttime is crazy. Nighttime is bad. I'm tired. I go to bed. Mid-afternoon. Exhausted.

A noon show time would be nice. This is post-nut energy. We have post-nut. I've nutted five times today. What? I've nutted five times. On who? What's his name?

Ha! Still got his good stuff. There it is. Still got it. I'm not gay. Still got the speed. Still got the speed. What? I've nutted five times on who what's his name? Still got speed All these years still got his for not gay your favorite ice cream What is it what would you jerk off would you fuck I'm gonna say you fucked two women one twice and then you jerked off after both times and both women. No, I knelt at three times today. That's incredible in your 40s.

Two sexes, one jacking. Was the last one like a, like a dribble? Why'd you have to jack off after having sex? It just, you needed more? I always jack off after sex. Because during the sex you're focused on her or him in your case, or do whatever, nailed you. Bobby's not gay.

That was good. Can we not joke about that? Why, it was good. We're not homosexual. We shouldn't joke about it because Dan is gay. Can I say something? Can I say something? So that's not getting it. That was good. Can we not joke about that? Why? It was good. We're not homos. We shouldn't joke about it, because Dan is getting it. Can I say something? Can I say something? So what?

That's not a joke. Sorry, I have a deep cavernous asshole. And mouth. Stuffy ween. Let's all take another sip. It's good, right? Yeah, it is really good. It's called an Amanda.

You sipping, homie. It's refreshing. It's good, isn't it? Chocolate, it's like chocolate. There's chocolate in it? It's chocolatey, doesn't it? That's called an Amanda? There's chocolate in it? It's chocolatey, doesn't it? That's called an Amanda? It's so much coffee, it's chocolatey.

That's called an Amanda? It's not for a quiet person. Amanda, Amanda Blow. Amanda Hug and Kiss. No, get off your phone, Joe. Why are you on your phone, Joe? He's setting up a bit, he's setting up a bit that we can do.

No, he's texting him. No, he is. He's setting up the bit about the people of if this is a f*** or not. No, no, this is gonna be big. Is this a f***? Are you a f***? Is that the the bit about the people of, if this is a f*** or not. This is gonna be big. Is this a f***? Are you a f***?

Is that the game? Are you a f***? We're gonna lose sponsors with that. We're not gonna lose anybody, they know what we do, you f***ing f***. If we could afford to lose two or three sponsors, I gotta be on a studio this month. Yes, especially the ones that pay $1.50.

That's pretty cool. Mark and I briefly lost a sponsor, but then we edited the ad and they were like, where you back? We were like, okay. Who was it? I'd rather not say I would rather you do say cock rings

No, I would rather you fucking do say it it was therapy related. Oh Better help better help dropped us to better help dropped us cuz you guys harassed that woman whose son We did not harass her cuz you guys drove a kid Fucking have suicide now. You made a kid fucking have suicide? No, he's a pussy. What? Is he dead? By the way, no.

There's no way did they force a kid to do suicide, but that's the funny thing. I got this box. Are they a sponsor of ours? Yeah. Yeah. Give me a box in the mail. Yeah, dude, I'm having one right now.

What is it? What does it do? It fucking helps you get clarity, has fucking all kinds of vitamins, helps you wake up a little bit. Can it make you come for a fourth time? Make you come. Louis. Does it do anything about your friends fourth time? Make you come. Lewis.

Does it do anything about your friends? Yeah. Oh no, Bobby, that's the one that makes you immediately have diarrhea. What? Pfft. Boom. Bum-boom.

That's the one that makes you grow three times your size. Oh no! Not again! Honey, I blew up Bobby. I gotta get another stomach flu. Mental performance, dude. Just get ready. Bobby's about to have a sharper mind lower stress calm energy perfect thing for this Turn your lights back on hey Dan. Oh my god. This does this operates your generator Yeah, breathe lions main to operate your generator. It's okay. I'm sorry for you

Hey, that's best enjoyed chilled, but sorry man. You love you kid. I love you too me. You are better now You're way more That's the anti-oxygen so proud of you did the b12 damn reclaim your brain. Oh, yeah, I was always being nice It's like fine. Whatever you have a small mouth Why does that be nice? I don't make you honest. I don't say that Hey guys, it's Dan I got away from the. I just want to talk to you one on one. Crazy episode, am I right? Life's been a little crazy. One thing that helps me unwind, cornbreads, hemp, CBD gummies.

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off their first order. Just head to cornbreadhemp.com slash regs with a Z because we nasty. And use code regs at checkout. That's cornbreadhemp.com slash regs with a Z, R-E-G-Z, and use the code regs. Joe, what's your game? It's a little fucking game.

What's your game you want to play with us? You pick two celebrities and you say who's older. Joe, what's your game? It's a little fucking game. What's your game you wanna play with us? You pick two celebrities and you say who's older. Meg Ryan, Tom Cruise. That's a good one. That is a good one. That's a good one. Ah. I'm gonna say Tom Cruise is older.

I'm gonna say Meg Ryan. I say Tom Cruise older by a couple years. What are you gonna say? A few years, actually. Meg Ryan. I'm gonna say Tom Cruise is actually eight years older than Meg Ryan. Tom Cruise is actually eight years older than Meg Ryan. Tom Cruise is a little bit older.

Now you're going to say eight, alright I'm going to say he is... Oh shit, it was poison. Magic Man was poisoned. Oh God! Six years older? Dan says Meg Ryan is older. Tom Cruise, six years older. Okay, okay, we're at a loss. It's like a game you'd play in the park with your friends. Who do you say? Who do you say? Yeah game you'd play in like the park with your friends.

Who do you say, who do you say? Just pick one. Yeah, well we're in a fucking studio with our friends. I'm just trying to get it cooking. It's gonna get cooking from here. Just say who. I said who. Who said who?

I said who, I said who. And I don't like you, I don't like you just making things up. I'm sorry. The game's great. It's late. You know what, dude, seriously. No, there's too much sugar in there.

This is so good. There's too much sugar. Brother, if you want to, it's right here. I have a lot of these ingredients in my coffee. Okay. Will you stop bringing up your coffee until it comes out? That's fine. I know, I've got another eight weeks. Eight? China.

China. Chicken to China, the Chinese chicken. China's fucking me. Oh my God, are you gonna have tariffs? Are you getting Chinese coffee? Are you getting tariffs? Chickadee China, the Chinese chicken. All right, who is older?

Hit us with it. 62. 62 years older. And how old is that? fucking duck bitch. Meg Ryan. 63! Dan wins! You old bitch! My dick! What a fucking creep. Yeah dude, I would. Tom Hanks, John Candy. Who's older? John Candy's dead. I know, but who was born first? You fucking think inside the box. John Candy's older. 100 know but who was born first you fucking think inside the box John Candy's older 100% older you think so So a hundred percent. Hey

Yeah, you're saying candy older Yeah, okay candy candy. We got candy candy. What do you mention candy Bobby's freaking out now candy, dude Candy, I'm not fat. I've just never seen Bobby eat candy really. I know it's not really a joke I'm not fat. I've just never seen Bobby eat candy really. I know, it's not really a trick. I'm a little fat. He said I'm not fat. I think the worst thing you could ever do to a guy who lost weight is grab his stomach

and then go. Move it? And then hold it. Move it? Like a ham. I like to move it. I'm not fat. And he just went like this.

Come here, let me grab it. Oh, you got it. Stop, let me grab it. Get in there. Let me get in there, right? No, I know where to get on you. You know where. in there right now. I know where to get on you Come on dude, stop don't cock block Let it go down. Let it go Who

Candy around I said Tom Hanks. Candy, Candy, Tom. Who are you? Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh uhhhhh uhhhhh uhhhh. Why are you gonna do that? Why? Why we're having fun. Can we have fun? Yeah, he's older whatever John Candy Negative Nelly man. Who's older? Nelly? Who are you picking? Nelly? Oh look who wants to play. Nelly Furtado. Oh good one. No Nelly's older than Nelly Furtado. It's not good man. We haven't fucking saw who's older. Nelly Furtado. You can't go to the next person until you get the person that we just did. Right. John Candy, Nelly Furtado. Who do you pick? I pick John Candy. Okay Candy Candy Candy. It's candy. You said it's candy already.

You already knew that? How do you know? Because I played it the other day. He plays this game all night. How about this? Get ready. This is better. If you guys need next gig, right? This you're gonna like this one. Oh please.. Lewis. You're gonna like I want to like everything black people you've tried your hardest fine Next gig you have to Shay you can warp there. You're there in the hotel No check-in no no drive to the airport. No nothing, but there's a 30% chance I like checking in my hotel because I've Hilton Honors diamonds. Well whatever it is you don't have to check it at the airport. I like that conversation. You don't have to check it at the

airport ass face. In front of other people. You don't have to commute. Well I'm a premier one camp member anyway. Whatever you have I have better. Wow, wow, challenge, challenge, challenge, challenge. TSA3, Digital IT, Clear. Are you on Delta? I'm United. Are you on Delta? Are you on Delta? I'm United too. I'm United. Diamond, diamond, diamond. Yeah, anyway, okay, so you could just warp there, you're there instantly to your hotel, but there's a 30% chance you lose your dominant arm for six months.

Only 30% chance. Next day? I'll travel. No, I'll travel. I don't mind traveling. I love traveling. Traveling's not that big of a deal. Yeah dude, we're first class with Diamond Elite. You don't have to drive, you don't have to park, you don't have to get up early, you don't have to check in. I have an Uber. I do this every weekend. It's just not that big a deal. I have a car service pick me up. I do this every weekend. Every weekend I do this. I do it. Right now you're just in Vegas. Bang!

can I do this? I do it right now you're just in Vegas. It's not a arm. You gotta understand something. I can't. That's why dominant arm. It's not a bloody shit arm. It's just a nice knob position. Marty Marty goes once in a while. My dad gets noodle arm. It's not. It's just God. That's a ridiculous hypothetical. Only 30% chance. It's one of the dumbest things I've ever heard. I come up with that. Well, I hate traveling.

All right, all right, so. You gotta sit in traffic. How about this? Remember the other day we did a pocket set. 30% chance you get your paycheck cut by 70%. What? That's more valuable than the arm. From the gig.

From that one gig. No, I'd rather have no arm. That's for six months That's insane six months. No arms. It's kind of fun having no arm. That's what you that's what you get paid for anybody with an arm That is missing an arm. Please write Joe right now and tell him it's not fun. It's missing on all that's crazy But it's not you don't miss it. You just have a dead arm, right? Like Bell's palsy, so you got to put it in a sling You got to do something with it. Just stick it in your pocket. That looks retarded.

Why? Nobody knows. No, no, it's nub. Like this, dude. It's a nub. It's only a 30% chance. But I'm saying. So it's this.

The fucking. You guys just enjoy going through security. I don't enjoy it. But I jerk off with both hands. 1% that I would lose my arm, I'm not doing it. No, thank you. For six months, you get it back. Dan, I like going through security. Me too. I have everything. I would lose my arm. I'm not doing it. No, thank you Get it back Dan. I like going through security me too. I have everything I love flying by people

I love going to one eye. I saw that one eyes worse. No one eyes not worse How will you lose a patch like how about this Thor you lose half your teeth? That's crazy That's the back ones. I'm kind of brush half my teeth that by the way That is all you do You can transport and lose half your teeth. You just gotta take meth and then you wake up in Vegas. You go, huh? Where's that? Let me get that off the top of your head. All right, fine. You have to blow your dad's half his teeth. It's better actually. What do you

finally eat a full meal? Joe, I didn't laugh at that dude. Yeah, I mean, he means he needs a clear space for the food to land. How about this? You have to blow your dad to completion or eat your mom out. We don't have dads like you, you piece of shit. Are we going to blow some guys dad? Yeah, that's right. We get to suck your dad's dick. Yeah, Steve. Blow Steve? We all blow your dad would be great. Blow bang your dad? All right. Well, I'm sorry for trying to fucking point guard for my cast buddy you're doing great thank you give us a voice number one you're the shooting guard Lewis is the part of the

shooter guy like Michael Jordan I'm averaging 32 a game over here six MVPs I'm over here I'm Shaq I'm Shaq laugh. Starting to laugh. Pass me the rock. Bobby's a mascot with a big silly head on. Why don't you fuck up? I started this whole thing. You'd be nothing without me. Bobby jumps on a trampoline and does a flip. I hope Jay fucking leaves you. Just the way I got Bobby really made me laugh.

I got a silly noodle head. Here he comes. It's the dunkin' Moose! The Dunkin' Moose. Bobby's leaving. You fucking made Bobby leave. He'll be back. He's not coming back. I bet you he'll come back.

He's not. You fucked up. If he comes back I bet he's got a t-shirt gun. He's not Because I was worried about Robert saying you're the you're the shooting guard, he's the fucking center, I'm the point guard, and Bobby's the mascot dunking movies. He dunks, you know a mascot's going dunk on a trampoline. That's not bad. Bobby, come back. Maybe if we all try really hard, we can wish him back.

If we just go Bobby Bobby No steak or no chicken rest of your life. You got to cut one out. Oh, that's hard I mean if it's a time decision because they cut out steak chicken chicken more diverse chicken nuggets chicken noodles I would chicken Dan. Could you not lean far as back? Hey, could you fucking not be an asshole? Sorry? Where's Bobby? Go get him. Go get Bobby, Paco. I promise he just left.

He's very upset. If he left, that is... The gayest thing I've ever seen him with. Hilarious. No, his wife needs him. He's like getting divorced now, and you're all calling him a fucking fat asshole. Well, I'm gonna have the rest of this Amanda.

Can we get another run? I can do a chamomile. Huh? It's only right downstairs. It's not even a run really. Maybe Bobby will do it. So one text Please someone Lewis in the group text, please You get us another round from Reggio? I'll have a chamomile tea, please. I'm good. I'm going to drink the rest of this Amanda since Bobby left. Oh, fuck. And I'll take a Lodge because that's uncaffeinated.

You know how people fake their own death in sitcoms and they're always like hiding to hear what people say at their funeral and then they interrupt? I think that's what Bobby's going to do. That's what Bobby's doing. I think he's going to pop it. This is a very funny text. Hey guys, let's take a quick moment and thank smallbatchcigar.com for supporting today's show.

No, I don't want to take a quick moment. I want to take a long moment. Guys. I want you to go slow on this. Guys, run the bath. Oh, light some candles. Get some candles lit. Hey, small batch, get in here. Throw some bath bombs in there.

Can we have a cigar? Yeah, we can. Light it with one of them candles. Every time we do the small batch ad, it should be the length of a cigar smoke. Oh, welcome to 40 minutes. Yeah. They go, get over it.

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right my father my father's is that where Anakin Skywalker's room honestly for a non cigar smoker just sounds like you guys are making up stuff we're just going there's a hot water don't peep in there's master blended don't peep in there's my father her husband owns Tatuai there is you got Connecticut rapper. Do not smoke my cigar. That is my finger. Guys, this is an ad. I'm on focus. Yo, pre-shipping every order almost every order that lives in two to three days. Bavita packs. Bavita packs. That's the key.

You know what I do when I go and I don't get. You stick a Bavita pack right in your ass. You're a fresh nut. Sixty-nine percent humidity in my asshole, bitch. It's a jungle. You're going to die. I don't have AIDS. Anyway. Why did shit. It's a jungle. You're gonna die. I don't have AIDS.

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Dry as a witch's pussy, as they say. They crack, whoa. You think you can put that in the ad? Dry as a witch's pussy? What happens with cigars is they get they get unhydrated Yeah, and then when they fall they crack you don't want that Bobby no on D with the Z use code regs Rgz 10 1 0 discount code for 10% off plus 5% rewards and don't sneeze at those rewards points those watch you

God bless you bless you. I can't believe we can't get. Those are not rewards. Achoo! God bless you. God bless you. I can't believe we can't get Starbucks tea at this hour. This is awful. I got a lot to come in. Why are you dressed like a merchant marine? Fucking Paco. Really bugged me. Paco stinks.

He's really snoopy. Anyway, smallmatchesgore.com is the website. Use that promo code REGSAND for 10% off and 5% rewards points. All right, where were we? Back at the show? This could be the end of the show. Oh, what? Like in general? Yeah. Or like the end of the episode. I mean, I would love for it to be the end of the episode. I think it's gonna be the end of us as a group. I don't know. As a band Paco is putting on his snow pants. You guys, oh, here's a topic. Best

three piece rock and roll band all-time Jimmy Hendrix experience Jimmy Hendrix experience the police Nirvana You got who else cream? Green day Ben folds five. They're great. Aren't they five He's he actually gone. I Told you he left I'm not I swear to God. I know text probably he doesn't get the time. He's picking up stuff from regio. No, that is picking up stuff from regio. I think it was a tense fight. You guys want to break it that give him any leeway. You didn't give

him any fucking Kush for what calling him a dunking. No, that's the beginning at the beginning. You didn't empathize. I'm not empathizing for somebody's power being out in their house. It's just not a good deal. But this is the thing. We're not talking about Don.

We're talking about Bobby. You empathize with what he's going through. I think Suarez is doing a bit. I think he left. Suarez, oh wait, Suarez, are you doing a bit right now? Did he tell you to tell us that

he left? Look at me in the fucking eyes. Look at him. Stop shaking your gels. He's like, oh. But yes, we're not doing a pockets with Don. She's being ridiculous, but he's dealing with a psychotic wife screaming at him.

Don't you see? I don't, I think this is all crazy. I think that text made it worth it. The text, the coffee text is very funny. I, as a fan of laugh, just want to say that was my favorite part. I can't deal with it. What? It's too much right now. What for acting like a blackout? I'm not gonna call him. I don't need anymore. No, we're good. Just a chamomile for me I guess. I feel terrible. I'll pay for it. I'll tip ya. Do we tip? Do we pay you guys? I'm pretty sure they We pay you guys, right? All right, great. I'm pretty sure they're paid. You guys are paid, right?

You know what would be great? They all just look at me. Hey, I got another one. Just thought of this one. Five million dollars cash, untaxable, in a briefcase. You got it. Ten make it ten. Or... I'll do anything. So you don't have to finish it. Five million dollars. Or you can fuck So you've got to finish it. $5 million. He's dead. Or you can fuck five women that you want. They're into it. Not a rapey thing.

They want to fuck you and you can just fuck them. Louis is already back out. Five women of your choosing. Five million. I fuck every woman that I've ever wanted to fuck. All right. You could say, hey, I want to fuck Val Kilmer, Meg Ryan. They jump on.

That is gay. That's not true. Because I'd go with them. Be honest with you, it's been very rare. You could make the $5 million work more. I'd take $5 million in a heartbeat. I'd take the women. It's not even close to the question.

That's crazy, Jay. But I'm saying no one's upset, no one knows, my wife doesn't find out, just five women, any women. I could fuck. All of these hypotheticals are so like easy to answer you take five million dollars who cares? No, I don't so it's not that easy. It's inspired. Will you have crazy shit? You would take fucking your arm being gone for yeah Remember that I thought that that was worth so I could just go like this. I'm in Paris great I have to buy a ticket arm. It's free. I'm saving a thousand dollars thirty% do you still get to Paris and your arms gone or do you also lose the trip to Paris no no when when you get back to where you're going you might lose an

arm for six months get it back no pain just kind of like no fuck it's just every time you jump you there's a 30% chance yeah calling Bobby yeah he ain't coming back brother that's's crazy. That's actually crazy. I would fuck the women. I'm just gonna ask Bobby this question. We don't want you to come back. Five million dollars. I could fuck Emma Stone, Anne Hathaway. Michelle Obama, Hillary Clinton. Call them a duck. Yeah. And Elizabeth Warren.

And Liz Warren. Better than $5 million. Usual sexy Liz Warren, that old war hawk. Because $5 million, yeah, I got money. I can make money. I can make money. I can't fuck Emma Stone. Give me the fuck.

But I could make $5 million. Just don't give a shit about fucking celebrities that much. Well can make money. I can't. I can't fuck Emma Stone. Give me the fuck. But I could make five million. Maybe. Just don't give a shit about fucking celebrities that much. Well forget celebrities. You can fuck. I don't know, but there's something to it. There's a movie star you've seen on TV. I guess. But also. I'm in my 40s. I want the five mil. Five million. It's also different too because you're a single guy. You're a free swinging. You're talking about guys who are in relationships.

I haven't fucked in 17 years for God's sakes I'd still go five million but you got money five million other five million is pretty sweet five million I don't have five million no but you could make you could have a year next year you make five all of a sudden Shane Gillis didn't have any money now he's got a million a week is a billionaire right so you're in the lot I'm not making five million next year. I'll tell you that very clearly. But in the next couple of years, you never know.

This pockets could blow up. Now that Bobby's gone, this could be... What if he was just around the corner and there's just a tear? Oh shit. I'm the one fucking defending him. I feel bad. I knew from the get-go this was trouble. What's trouble?

First of all, you can't fucking just get up and leave. Did he just call you? No. Damn. Is he texting? Nope. Nope. He's on his way home. I think he was looking for a way out. I don't think he's actually mad. I think he was looking for a way out.

He's not happy. But he was also in a bad mood. I think he wanted to go. He said he was going to be home in 20 minutes. So he did say. I think he fucking telegraphed that that I think he might have been planning it But doesn't live an hour away. Yeah, that's why so now he's leaving He's like don I'm on my way and that gives him peace of mind because she goes, okay

You're on your way and he goes. Yeah, I'm on my way dude. And she goes, okay, don't call me dude He's like I'm on my way. I do have to say though. There's part of me don't think this goes very funny I missed it because I felt concerned about my friend, but you guys don't have to deal with those kind of problems. It was so funny. But I do feel like there is something when there's people, they move away from the city and they're like, you're an idiot, you gotta move away, you're an asshole, enjoy the city, you're gonna get mugged,

the city's gonna get bombed, and then everything just goes wrong. That's not why I decided to move away. I'm not talking about you, I'm talking about other people that are like that. Move away, forget it, the city's great, like, you know, I'm not fucking worried about getting mugged or any of that shit. It's just being in the suburbs, being in the quiet, when you walk out into your backyard

and there's fucking birds chirping and there's a pool. I just want a backyard. I have so many birds in Battery Park City. I just want to have... Those are pigeons. Yeah, Joe. Those are crackheads screaming at the sun. Those are rats that have torn the wings off of birds.

I want a backyard for my dog. That's what I want. That's. Help me. I want a backyard for my dog. That's what I want. I just want a backyard for my dog. I want to open it and go, oh! And then she goes, she runs around like a lunatic. And then she goes, instead of a hallway of an apartment building. Dog park, like a lunatic.

Fuck that backyard. Throw the fucking tennis ball for her. Get her going, dude. That's great. The city was great when I was younger. It's a young man's city. It is. It's a young, sexy man's city.

And Lewis, I don't know if you know this, gets any pussy he wants. That's why I took the five milli. Buggy, I gotta be honest with you, it's very rare that there's been a woman that I've been attracted to and I didn't end up sleeping with her. Who has evaded you?

Almost nobody. Almost nobody that I've been, that I've been like you on. This is where we need Bobby back. This is where we need him. I mean that I've been to do that. I've been like, you want me? This is where we need Bobby back. This is where we need him. I mean, it's been very rare that we've been like, into a chick. Usually I'll see a chick, I'm like, oh, she's hot.

I want to hook up with her. And then eventually we're there. How about $50,000 and two women of your choosing? That's significantly different. Yeah, maybe two women. Of your choosing, any woman? On Earth? Any two. Any woman? Or 50K. Yeah, maybe two women. Of your choosing, any woman? On Earth? Any woman? Or 50k?

Okay, any two women? Two women. Let's go. Let's go. Okay. Sydney Sweeten. So there is a price. Get your goofy ass over here. Get those titties over here. Put on a luchador mask and get those giant titties over here.

You wouldn't want to fuck Parker Posey over five million. Parker? Parker Posey? 1995? What kind of fucking shit are you talking about cuz honestly if that's the case, I'm going 88 Elizabeth shoe. Oh I love shoe. I want to put her shoe in my ass People tell me Sarah looks like Elizabeth shoe. It's not at all Not in the least I'm telling you 30 different I love Sarah. I think she's great. She does that all the time She's not look like my bit sweet sweet baby angel. It's you people tell me and Elizabeth shoe aged

Beautiful. Yeah, Alicia Silverstone. I got five There's beautiful hot women now Very weirdly like her body was a little weird. Alicia Silverstone. Yeah, yeah. What? She wasn't that hot. She's lumpy. 95 Alicia Silverstone. First pull her up.

First of all, 88 shoe. You're trying to take that against 88 shoe. I'm not saying she's better than shoe. I love shoe. And then we're moving on to other people. You don't see any Sarah right there. Let me see. No.

Seriously? Not even at all. Not even close. Stop trying to project. Right in that one? No. A little more in that one, yeah. Look at her though.

What a babe. What a stone cold babe. You think Bobby is in his car by now? He has a new truck. You think he's getting his regia? Maybe. No, not kidding, his regia. Do you think he'll pop up on his screen?

Now I have to feel bad, because Bobby couldn't take a joke. You call him. I called him. Call him again. Now he's in his car, now he'll pop up on this big screen. And ask him if he's grabbing his moose suit to do it.

You're telling me that's not Sarah Tallimache right there? Dead on. Dude. Oh, he hung up. Oh, he's mad. What a passive aggressive chick. He's mad. I can't even deal with it. I'm calling back. Tell me you got one more ad read. Wait, my phone died. Oh, there he is. He's back. Wait, no, somebody went to Reggio.

Yeah, it was Paco. Damn. Couldn't get to his phone. Well, here's the deal. And we all know how this is going to his phone. Well, here's the deal and we all know how this is gonna play out He's gonna get electricity him and dawn are gonna they're gonna talk until the Sun rises Then they don't need electricity Sounds back up dude dead. No more vampires You get done. I could see if there was vampires in his favor Freaking yes, dude. I live in Transylvania

Why don't understand see what the power is Noon what the fuck kind of place they living in the Yukon territory David I moved north of the city to Transylvania This castles in vampire. Oh, yeah, we Joey my That's all right camel mill you leave it in there all day. Yeah, no problem Guess what Louis Louis? What? Dad! Guys, look, right now, going online.

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VPN.com slash whoo with a Z cuz we're cool oh this is this is terrible we're a man down it's it's fine but it's terrible I mean come on what are you doing would you guys like a stand-in that is kind of like his size who we got Colin Quinn you want you on much to sit in this spot just not talk are you any your fucking mind rush I love you. No, I mean I fuck I want to fucking fight you right now for even suggesting. Yeah, what the fuck? You had someone downstairs that was gonna jump in maybe someone downstairs to get us some views. There's anyone big down there Chappelle go watch

Chappelle he goes I thought this was an interrogation. I didn't know this was a pocket. Is there anyone down there with hours about to admit look at the line on the cellar check up the line replacing Bobby. This is dead on my wife. Oh my god. No. I actually like I guess. Yeah. There is some blonde hair blonde hair pointy nose. Don't even fucking bring it at you like that. Eyes. They breathe. I mean, you're acting like, does that look more like Sarah or more like Katie Nolan? Don't, I mean, what are you bringing in Katie Nolan? Cause you're saying that's ridiculous. They both have eyes. They breathe. I'm like, she looks more like her than Don Kelly. Now that doesn't look like my wife. You did have a picture that did

look like I get it I do get it you're not crazy there's pictures where she resembles her yes thank you I mean who's that seller biggest people downstairs we have Chris red that's the biggest person on the lineup Jared Fried Jared free like you know it's funny no there was very good and Laura Pete Lee I Can do Ian Lara Rachel Feinstein John Bishop? He's huge. I don't know him though. I don't know me there pimp knows him Might be a Lord. Yeah, this is a rough line. I don't like any of these people. I know Bobby shouldn't have left Yikes, what about me who's gonna pump up the crowd? Oh, we got Josh on Myers What are you talking about?

Mark Norman has hot soup at 1030. Well, it's 942. He might as well go to that. Yeah. He's sending a stunt double. Man, remember when Bobby walked out on us? That's how we frame it. He did walk out on us.

He walked out on us. He did, he left us. Joe, you don't know about this because your dad stayed around, but Lewis and I know this. We just played the You Walked Out On Us. He did walk out on us. That's it. Joe, you don't know about this because your dad stayed around, but Lewis and I know this. We just played the, you walked out on us. He did walk out on us. That's it.

He went to go get cigarettes and he never came back. Yeah. I would love it. Next time we saw Bobby, he's like chain smoking. He goes dead. That really fucking threw me for a loop. I don't understand what happened. This is on you and a little bit you. It's 60 you. Good. 35 you. Why 35 me? because he got mad at you because

you jumped in on that who cares with each other no not the man the mascot also for that you were busted his balls to be on the phone when he's going through a hard time it's not a hard time it's not a real hard time but his wife father was murdered yeah dude time ago I can't fucking reach what about your mother power went out hey Louis a hard time Lewis Lewis talk about your mother heroin addict cut this motherfucker right here you talk about my wife and kids you don't know me cut this I go back to my car shoot everybody's the hard time you're not seeing the hard By the way, that was a great white man can't jump.

The hard time is the wife on his ball. We talking hard times, baby. We talking hard times. Bobby's gotta drive back up to a lady who hasn't been watching her stories, baby. Hard time. I can't imagine any of us ever just walking out on the show. Hard time.

I would leave, but I would come back. You have my word. I wouldn't leave. I mean, nothing was said that was harsh. We shouldn't have to be sensitive because. Here's the deal. We caught him on a two-bond fire day. He did two bonfires.

And an hour. And an hour downstairs. We're talking about a drain man. Bobby, I know you're watching this. I know you're at home watching this. He went through a lot today. And I want to say to you, you're a good friend. I want to say to you, that mascot shit was hilarious.

100% of it was very, very funny. Now, a Duncan Moose, we're talking about. Duncan Moose we're talking I mean what do we even do here I know he was living because he took all the stuff he was carefully took everything I think this is been there is still a skew by the way well I think this was all a plan should Should we get him a cake? No. He does love cake. Fruit basket. To bring him back? Next time. We give him like a balloon. This is crazy. I like to do the balloons. You're right. Lewis is right. We're not rewarding bad behavior. This is

crazy. We're not rewarding bad behavior. We're not fucking, we're just busting balls and fucking around. I shouldn't be taking his lights going out that seriously. I'm sorry This isn't this 19th century actually if dawn was in the hospital and then we were like fucking around too much It was really on edge, but like his general. Hopefully she goes to the hospital She can literally Google how to turn a generator on. Yeah, she called him. She called them three times or in the show Yeah, she also has a flashlight on her. This isn't a big deal There isn't a big deal. None of this is a big deal. I agree. She can watch a TV show. There isn't a storm hitting. Oh, there's a storm hitting next to me talking to Bobby.

This is bad. This is big thing you guys are thinking. Quick question. Do you think this is the last regs? Maybe. Lord, I hope so. It could be the last regs. Oh, you know what you should call it.

We should rename it the dregs. That's the name of the episode. The dregs of society. I fucking hate that. No should rename it the dregs Society fucking hate that no I Know the fucking drinks What do you want me to say I gotta be honest with you we the amount of fucking ball-busting that I deal with That people fucking trash me. I mean your murder parents get Stop, I mean, it's crazy talking about a black guy fucking be just like I'm literally we're making up a joke about a black guy fucking dawn I got I really fucks be just yeah, that's my reality. Hey, bro. Yeah, I live

You're talking about selling drugs on a radical medical. I'm a rapper I'm an actual drug dealer a wife fucks a black guy fucks my wife every my head every You got that one. Those flat tire tire we even had a flat tire that was like somebody shot the tire out that was a strip they threw the strip like you were in a car chase sleepy I'm sleepy Joe sleepy Joe dude Joe we don't like sleepy Joe um him leaving is upsetting me oh it's fine no it's it's but it's bummed me out because I know that he's gonna literally be like, dude, you're fucking with me, and you're fucking with him.

Oh, that phone call? Dude, when you see his name pop up, when you see his name pop up, you're gonna go like this. But you're gonna be playing like- Nobody did anything wrong. No. Nobody did anything wrong. I drank his Amanda.

And he did something wrong by leaving the fucking show. I think he wanted to go, he said I'm gonna be home in a half an hour. It doesn't matter. I think he had decided in his mind, I'm not making excuses, I'm telling you. Can you put a'm not making excuses I'm telling you can you put a vote out Paco I want you to put a vote out when this episode comes did Bobby leave intentionally what's it called premeditated premeditated was Bobby

leaving pre-mode leaving and also if we if he does get convicted I think we have to have a sentencing for him on the next step. We're gonna kill him. Here's we were planning on Your throat yo, yeah, what the fuck? Sucking off Suarez back there. We were planning on recording an extra for YKWD directly after this episode So I'm gonna assume not premeditated an extra you're gonna do it You guys were gonna do an extra YKWD after a patreon extra I'm gonna call Bobby because he is burning the candle at both ends. This is crazy.

He's doing two bonfires, a full regs, and a bonus, and a show. I mean, that's so much. Yeah, I'm just... Look, I'm not... I can't feel bad about... And I do, and I shouldn't. You feel bad, though? I do feel bad.

Bobby, you're watching at home. I do feel bad, but I shouldn't feel bad about fucking... Us fucking with Bobby. We all fuck with each other. So what we do. I'm gonna say we should probably call the episode dunking moose. And that in parentheses sorry. Sorry. If you are watching this Bobby do not click the comments. Brother, go ahead and block reddit and youtube. That's some deep water. This is not going to be good. Brother, you can't swim in that water. None of us can.

Do not read it. I would give a good two weeks. No reddit, no twitter, no. Don't hit click view comments. This is not going to be pretty. Cause this might be it. This could be it. 17 years.

It feels like it is. Nothing was said that was that bad. And if it was that bad, it's not going to be pretty. It's not going to be pretty. It's not going to be pretty. It's not going to be pretty. It's not going to be pretty. It's not going to be pretty.

It's not going to be pretty. It's not going to be pretty. It's not going to be pretty. It's not going to be pretty. It's not going to be pretty. This is not going to be pretty. Because this might be it. This could be it. 17 years. It feels like it is. Nothing was said that was that bad. And if that's that, that's that. 15 years of doing this show.

Yeah, because the thing he said when he got up, he was like, he was like, I started this whole fucking shit. I'm out of here. And then he fucking dipped off. He's like, there was too much truth right there. I think that was before. No, that was right as he said. I was going, huh-huh who you guys were for some action.

And then that spiral. So I shouldn't have done the moose voice. It was Oh, fuck. It was funny. Here's my plan. I'm going to do a pod with you guys in a pod with him and just try to really What do you want me to say? He's out. I'll tell you what. I bet he's a lot happier if guys and a pod with him and just try to really have a foot in both. What is it else? Why you can't be in all this together? What do you want me to say? He's out. I'll tell you what, I bet he's a lot happier if we do it during the day, not on a Tuesday.

Look, I don't know what to say. Oh, it's today Tuesday? We all fucked. Yeah, double bonfire. That's the problem. That's why I said he was tired. Look, I fucking. But this is the second time we've done a Tuesday.

By the way, on Mondays, I was doing fucking Lewis and Zach. You were. I was doing skanks. And look at you now. I was doing, I mean, I do all this. You cleared your schedule. How you like me now? Get in, bitch. Now that I'm on my way. And look at you now. I mean, I love it. You played your schedule. How you like me now? Get in, bitch.

Now that I'm on my way. Get in, bitch. You still think I'm crazy. My father is real gay. All right, that's a new game. Pick two celebrities, which one grew closer to the equator. Let's go, Joe.

Oh, that's fun. Javier Bardem or Penelope Cruz. There are a couple, but one of them. Your games stink, Joe. My games are fun. They're AI generated. Dan Aykroyd or John Goodman? Who gives a shit?

John Goodman. Goodman. No! Wait. Aykroyd. Bring it up. No, Goodman. You know how bad it hurt?

Goodman was already old in the 80s. Aykroyd on SNL was a young buck. 75. 75 he was a young buck. Yeah, but even 50 years later. Aykroyd did years goodman didn't break with Roseanne people. Yeah. The fat, it wears off the rings. Um, real quick before we find this out or gives them time to look it up, you know, bad, my feelings would be hurt if I was Bobby and I came back in and I sat around the corner and go John Goodman, Dan,

you're back to doing the shitty game. I would be like, well, should we have stopped the show? I'd be like, where were you? We've been playing since July. I go, guess how old Cameron Diaz is? Yo, shit. All right, who is that? Hold on, producers.

And I know you fucking have loyalty to Bobby. Yeah. So did Bobby text you guys anything? He did not text me. Nothing. No, he's done. He's done for the night. What if he crashed his car into a tree? Don't do that. What if it's the last thing? text me. Nothing. No, he's done. He's done for the night. What if he crashed his car into a tree?

He's dead. What is the last thing? Don't do that. What if he's dead? Right now, Bobby and Don are yelling at each other like a manager in an empire. He's got his hat back. He's kicking dirt out of it.

I was in the dark. Well, these fucking guys are busting my balls. Well, I don't know. I got a fucking board, and we could raise it on my fucking neck. And then the big retarded one said that I was a moose. I mean, what do we? You made me divorced.

Am I crazy? Hold on. Producers, were we? You may be divorced. But, well, am I crazy? Hold on, producers, were we being that harsh? You've seen us go way harder. I mean, it's crazy. This was a pretty mild, that we're just fucking around. I called his son a mass shooter once. But I think it's the same. If you're watching this at home, Bobby,

it was episode 42. That's good. By the way, happy Jackie. Coming in with. Guys, happy Jackie Robinson day. Everybody wears 42 today. I fucking hate that. 42, love it. Silly. John Goodman, Dan Aykroyd. Coming in with guys happy Jackie Robinson day everybody wears 42 today. I fucking hate that 42 love silly

John Goodman Dan Aykroyd, let's get some final answers. What's up with you boy 42? We ever talk about the fact that 42 42 came out the next day in the lottery. Oh, yeah That's a real thing that happened. That was the wildest thing you would have played that we said it We said we should play that in the lottery 40 then it came out. That's crazy. It's a wild thing The lottery is gay. Yeah, three. And then it came out. That's crazy. It's a wild thing. The lottery's gay? Yeah. You didn't know that?

It came out. That's this thing. That's why Bobby left. Yeah. We just blamed each other. He knew that joke was coming. He saw the future. He went, dude, I drank that fucking weird shit.

I saw a bad joke. I gotta get out of here. Yeah, by the way, what a terrible fucking advertisement for fucking. That's so funny. Apparently it makes you lose your fucking. Apparently it makes your pussy, Sandy. He drank Magic Mine and quit his job. It turns out that he went, I'm not going to play that in the lottery. I'm not going to play that in the lottery. I'm not going to play that in the lottery. I'm not going to play that in the lose your fucking mind. Apparently it makes your pussy, Sandy. He drank Magic Mind and quit his job. He turns out there,

he went, I'm out there. He went, later gay wads, I'm not a moose. Get Magic Mind, relax and ease into the bathtub. Oh, fucking mental clarity, brain function. It'll really fucking ease your mind. Who is older? John Goodman or Dan Aykroyd? And by how many days a year? Dan Aykroyd by two years and three days. I like that. I say Dan Aykroyd by four years. All right, pull it up. Let's go to the script. 72 years old. Oh, I might be in trouble. July 1st, 19522 and then what about oh my god Akroyd by a month not even not even know mom yeah wait it's Goodman

dude it's good I don't know how dates work by 10 days by we will be right back after these words from our sponsor hit him them up. I used to have a podcast. Did you ever have friends that turn against you when your wife is living in the dark? Coming out of the dark. Did you ever drink Magic Mine and then decide to split on your podcast? This comment section is gonna be brutal. I just split on your podcast. Oh, this comment section's going to be brutal. It's not going to be pretty.

Honestly, that's the only reason why I feel bad. I might take an edible and read it. Yeah. Hey, guys. The comment section's going to be crazy. Hey, guys, it's your boy. They're not going to be on Bob's side here. Comment moose if I should read the comment.

Use the promo code moose to get 20% off Magic Mind. How is that not our next promo code? Oh boy. This might be the end of the red. He might not direct my special. No. He might pull out a special. No, he's gonna direct.

It's July, a lot of stuff can happen. Yeah, you'll be fine. There's a lot of baseball left. Yeah. By the way, socks were up when I left. They suck. Nah, they won last night and tonight. No, last night they lost 14 to one.

My bad. Giants look good. That's what I was thinking of. Giants beat the Phillies. The socks are so streaky. They're like win, win, win, lost, lost, lost. We're going to lose, Lewis. He's on the phone.

What are you texting Bob? No. Who are you texting? The skinks. Elizabeth Schuh? They keep on texting me. I told them I'm on. Oh, Dave and Jay? yeah, they keep on texting me about Dave is huge that fucking that think my whole algorithm Arguing for Palestine for Halle Stein Douglas Murray. Yeah that British guy seems like a prick. Yeah seems like a real

He's like I went to Oxford days. What have you done Dave like smoking weed? He goes, I don't know man man. Skank Fest is pretty ill. They both made some good points. No, yeah. Dave fucking killed it. He was great. Even if you don't agree with him, you're going to be like, people are like, dude, he's an idiot. I was like, are you out of your mind? You know, fucking smart Davis. Yeah. Good. He is that or rating his fucking ideas. He's very good at the word or rating. I imagine he taught me. Yeah. Um, what is he? Cicero? Anyways, Bobby. I'm like having a card. I'm gonna do a show where I have a card. I think it's, honestly, can I just tell you this?

I'm just sitting over here watching you do it, and I go, I think Joe found his thing. Nice, and Dan, they tell me you are from Colorado. I am. Is that right? Aurora. Aurora, Colorado, and that is where that shooter guy was from, Batman.

Yeah, he was not from there. He was actually from San Diego, but he lived in Aurora. Is that right? Okay, well, I gotta get a new, can we get a new card over here, please? Do you think Bobby calls all of us? I think he's gonna call me first because I'm in the good house.

Yeah, because he's gonna call me first. Fucking Lewis. He might, if he wants, here's the deal. Now this is a side bet, who's he calling? You're not first. No way, dude. You're out. No, I'm there to like kind of do some fun voices

to clear him up at the end. Why, I can't just tiptoe around like Bobby yet we get it you're the senior guy here okay no listen Lewis aren't we all equals on this yeah we're supposed to be we never fuck with Dan yeah you do barely you do it's always my he's the most popular one I I said popular. Jesus. The reason is most popular is because he's the most talented. You guys are so sweet to me. It's got the most money to know. I think you probably you and my head, you made some big fucking no. Yeah, I did. No, you have the relationship with your chick. She makes a lot of money too. Yeah, my chick makes no money. His girl is fucked. You're absolutely right. Elizabeth Shue over there.

She hasn't made any money since Cocktail. We're like Elizabeth Poo, get out of here. She makes money. Her and Katie make some pretty good money. Katie Hannigan. Katie Hannigan, yeah. Yeah. Nolan.

Yeah. Katie Nolan. A little bit. I put it on my vibe. Drop in the bucket. Sweet baby girl. I think if he wants the smoke, he calls Lewis first. And I think if he wants to be talked up, he calls you first.

I think he calls me if he just wants to make someone feel bad. One thing's for sure, he calls me. I'm going to be like, Louis is a piece of shit. He was completely wrong. He's a faggot. I'm absolutely answering the phone going, huh, don't forget to get your shirt when you leave. Ba-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na.

Two hot dogs for ten dollars? Watch out section 20! Here comes some shirts! The one thing I would say, and I'm not defending the move, is y'all, you could have sensed this is a diff, I could sense something, this is not pretty. God damn that is. Bobby, can you get us another round of Reggio? It's the funny

Do you think I was my idea by the way? Yeah, it was great. Thank you. It was great assist point guard point guard over here By the way, you're the one who started all of it You call yourself a point guard then we went into a whole thing about what our roles are Attention to center chords! For the next 15 minutes you will be dazzled! And then it cuts us in the locker room like alright what bits do you guys want to do? Alright I think we run a pick and roll bit. Dan you set up a voice. Louis you're going to come in with a zinger.

Joe, take the shot. Joe, take the shot. If the double team is Lewis, you just kick it out. That's the most troll way to answer the phone. I can't handle it, it's so funny. Oh, Bobby, I'm sorry for watching. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Everyone loves that in the comments. There's no way we can put this episode out. No, what are you kidding?

We've got to put it out. It's our final album. This is The Beatles on the Roof. This is crazy. I'm sweating. I'm sweating. I'm fucking sweating. Boy, this lineup is really, there's not even a

person that could kind of pop up. Yeah. No, we can't replace Bobby anyway. Yeah, we wouldn't. We wouldn't want to. I'm not talking about the future of the show. No, you were trying to move on. Lewis and I were saying Sarah. We're trying to salvage our relationship with Bobby. We love Bobby. You want to move on immediately. We love you Bobby. I've been talking about a guest for a long time. See this is why this is why Bobby's this is why Bobby left No, no, I'm in trying to get guests on forever. Wow magic mind. It says here. I don't know. Oh Man is this gonna get real or is this just gonna be like fun and silly Mary Kate or Ashley Olsen who's older? Mary Kate by a minute. Come on Joe. That was a joke. I know Come on, you say come on Joe. Everyone come on minute. Come on Joe. That was a joke. I know. It's a joke too. Mike, come on. You say come on Joe. Everyone come on me. Come on Joe. Why you guys come up with something by the way. I think it's gonna get real.

You think it's gonna get real. You think you're gonna get a real call. Because by the way, your children are friends. Yeah. That's gonna affect. That's what it affects. Joe and me, we walk out of this thing. Yeah. I don't want my kid anywhere near his kid. Yeah. I mean. That deserved a lot more than that. I mean, it's just. This is why Bobby left. Look, we've all had sensitive moments.

Yeah, of course. You know? Not me, but yeah. We've all been bitch made at one point. I mean, the second episode, you guys almost fought. Yeah. If I hadn't gotten in between you and then it went swimmingly after that there's a couple hiccups. Yeah

it'll be fine. It's water under the bridge. Water under the bridge. Honestly once it gets that generator running or he catches that Spanish guy blowing dots back out. I think he's right back in the mix dude. I don't know. Unless I got another text not from Bobby. Oh man. Do you think you're going to be every time you check the phone, like thinking it's Bobby, if you get a notification, Lewis, could you listen to us? Yeah.

Well, you call him. Now, if we finish the show, you leave. Well, you call him. But you've already called him. Yeah. You've done your part. One more time? He'll answer this time.

Yeah. I still think we're off the air. This time, he'll answer. OK. I think he's probably fine There it comes It'll answer I think I know or he might just got home though. Hey, could be dealing I don't know how far away just bumping into walls

like a video I shouldn't feel bad. No. That's crazy. No, you shouldn't feel bad. He's trying to make you feel bad. Yeah, that's fucked up. And that's what I would say.

He should feel bad for making us try to feel bad. He left the show. Leave a message. I'll be back here soon as I can. He doesn't seem the kind of guy that would talk on the phone while driving. Everyone's favorite, the Maverick Moose. It's time to dunk. It's five trampolines. We pass each other on the way out of the tunnel. Section 320 watch out! He's got the mask off all sweaty. They're on fucking fire. They're hot dude. Oh shit. You know what I'm gonna turn it on him. I'm

gonna text him. No no don't. I'm like what are you doing dude? Let it rest. No. Let it rest. If you do it do it in the group text though so we can kind of take it. Yeah I gotta see the reaction. I want to be that that what's that meme or whatever you call it with a guy opens the chair. What is that from? Oh, that's Jason Momoa from It's in the movie. It's like a funeral scene. I think that's very funny when people use the chair. Yeah. Yeah, it's great I'm like an old dad. I see that in the internet. I'm like, ha. Yeah, we're old. That's gold I saw a couple good ones the Homer Simpson into the bushes. It's great. Very funny guys. This might be the last regs. What do you, you know, and I shouldn't feel bad. No, six

ads on this. So six guys, we can't put any ads in after Bobby left. Yeah, we can. Okay. We know it's just him fucking like, hey dude, he's not even here. Yeah, it's so funny. By the way, that's the funniest. That's very funny. Just to do the ad like right after something, just going, dude, I love my fucking small batch because it's a guy.

I think we name it The Walkout to get the algorithm. It's all algorithm. Yeah, you're right, The Walkout. Sell it, baby. Yeah, you're right. The Walkin? The Walkin. The Walkin. The Walkout, I'm sorry, I didn, you're right. The Walkin? The Walkout. The Walkin.

The Walkout. I'm sorry, I didn't like the way you were making fun of me. Christopher Walkin. I'm gone. Or, hold on, let me think. Let me just sit here and think. Bruce Springsteen.

Christopher Walkin or Bruce Springsteen? Christopher Walkin. I know Springsteen September of 49. That was the year that my father was born is dead. Christopher Walken, you know Christopher Walken's family's from Astoria and they used to own the bakery on Broadway? I did not know that. Did you know the police shot a guy with a fucking knife right in front of my landlord's flower shop 31st Street and 30th Avenue two nights ago And I knew but oh, what is that come? Yeah, dude. What did you just do that for? Did Bobby poison you?

Magic Mike I see a lot of lawmakers in here All right, pull up Christopher Walken birthday cuz I know 82 years old. You're fucking good. Jesus. Yeah you're done. This is a good episode. You know. Dan's up trying to leave Timekeeper. Timekeeper Dan. Timekeeper Dan. I'm not trying to go anywhere. I'm not Bobby. I started turning on him. Bobby, how was it Joe? I feel bad now. Why? Because I feel bad because my friend is fucking pissed. Well, but he left.

I don't feel, am I crazy or I feel like it was an unwarranted walking out? It was an unwarranted, it felt an extreme reaction. But I think it was just because he wanted to go home. He wanted to go home. The family's dealing with the family. Yeah, but then say family. It wasn't the angriest he's ever been. No, you can't say it like that. By the way, no, no.

He would get less destroyed in the comments if he went, hey, dude, I got to go. Like, you guys finished the show without me. There's no way you let that happen. Don't act like you would let that happen. We're going to hold him here? No, but you'd go like, oh, or... We'd bust his balls and fuck with him, obviously. Yeah, this was probably, honestly,

kind of the best way to leave. Fake mad, he's got you worried. Not bad, yeah. He's got me a little shook. Well, he also, he could, he might be faking mad, like you said, or he could play it off like he was fake mad. Yeah. A lot of options, this could go,

this is like a chess match. This guy, Bobby, if you're watching this, you can go so many ways. Don't read the comments, don't read the comments. this guy Bobby if you're watching this you go so many ways don't don't read the comment Don't read the comments. There's no way he's watching this episode Yeah, right. Yeah watching it or listening to it. Maybe he'll listen to it listening. It's five past the hour We're broadcasting live from above the world famous. I would I couldn't listen to this show if you paid me 500,000 Joe, why don't you don't shit on the thing? We're making I'm not shitting on I'm saying I couldn't listen to this show if you paid me 500,000 Joe. Why don't you don't shit on the thing? We're making

I'm not shitting on I'm saying I couldn't listen to I wouldn't watch, you know, my wife and I fuck either But I'm part of it. Well, I do video yourself tape yourself. I would like to but she's she doesn't trust the cloud Yeah, I would fall in the cloud dude. I'd go get an old Camcorder. Yeah, I mean I am girls. I shouldn't trust the, but are you or you move fast and loose with the cloud? Oh, yeah, brother. Someone hacks you. They're gonna see a lot of purple penis. What is your hidden folder look like? It's gonna be wild. It's wild. Let me see six things. Six. Any six things from that you're hidden folder. Oh my god. That's a

game. I bet you just have or if I think that's illegal. I think we found out recently that that's illegal for me to show you. Yeah, the hidden. Yeah, or just the orifices. I think that's illegal. I think we found out recently that that's illegal for me to show you. Yeah, the hidden? Yeah, or just the- Get outta here. Just me fucking women. That's illegal. Revenge porn.

Well, I don't think you're allowed to share. You can't sell it. This would happen with Vince McMahon. He was like showing videos of chicks and he got in trouble for that. That was the thing that he got in trouble for. Was he showing it publicly or just to people? No, just to like-

No, he showed it around the office. Yeah. Oh, all right. Yeah, so I will not do that. So don't send me sick things. So let's go off the air. And I'm on all right. Yeah. So I will not do that. So don't send me sick things. So let's go off the air. And I'm on the Wi-Fi if you want to drop it over.

I'm going to do a little fucking airman. All right, gentlemen, let's take a quick moment and thank sheathunderwear.com. My favorite product. You guys. I mean, you guys say it with your chest and you say it with your crotches. Sheath underwear numero uno. It's all I wear, literally. It's not bullshit.

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Hold your, hold your, your stuff, like just the sweet little. It feels like there's a young lady holding your cock while you were wearing your underwear. Should be illegal. But it is. A slightly, just barely legal gal holding your dick and balls while you're wearing your underwear. I'll just hold this while you walk around.

I like that the underwear elastic holds your fat in. Yeah. Oh. They have the strongest elastics. You're gonna get baby back, dude. You're gonna fart and that poop's gonna come up your back. I need to stop farting, Bob. How do you know I just poop Bob. What did you eat?

What'd I eat? What'd you eat today? Chinese chicken. Oh, around the corner, Chinese chicken. That is verbatim Mandarin. Sheeththunderwear.com. Sheeththunderwear.com is a website. Use the promo code regs, R-E-G-Z, with a Z,

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This next episode after this one. It's gonna be like I mean, I want to have a great episode today. We did second half has been awesome The second half has been awesome. Feels lighter, feels more free. No, dude, this is, this is, we're missing our guy. You know, look, I fucking, I love Bobby. I mean, Bobby fucking, Bobby was the godfather of podcasting. He taught us all how to do that. He was.

He was. He was. Now he's nothing, but back then. He's going to see that. Clip that. Well, I'm not saying, I'm saying, I'm taking fun of him. No, no gonna see that clip that. Well, I'm not saying I'm saying, I'm saying, I'm saying no, no, no, no, no, clip it. Dude, I'm drinking magic.

My so funny. You drag that. He goes, why are you crazy? You go, what are you drinking lead? Why did you fucking bug out? What'd you bug out like that, bro? I think he's fine.

I think he's going to say that he's going to go, dude, I know it was just fucking, I had to go. Don't always bust my balls. It was a long day. I feel he would have answered already if he wasn't actually pissed. Well, I think he can't answer when he knows we're still recording because technically he walked out on the job. That's crazy. Break open the case on what Patrice has. It's actually crazy. You know what's funny? This is unprecedented. I think the last person to do this was Danny Frankel, the Facebook guy who now runs punch up when we had him on 20 years. He walked out on this show. Yeah. Because he worked at Facebook and we were like, fuck it. I eat. Come, I come on kids faces. He was like, okay. I believe he worked out. You remember? Yeah. He had a panic attack on air. You might not have been there that

day. I think he, I think he weren't there. Yeah, dude, he was getting the diet version. But he was- Full version, he would shit blood out of his ear. No, Bobby's gonna be fine. Bobby's gonna be fine, you guys are gonna be- I mean, have we had anybody walk in our podcast ever? No, in the history of our relationship? I had one time-

It's always been a joke. You just go out in the hallway. Yeah, and you come back. What's his name? The black kid who was on America's Got Talent? Very funny. Norrie Davis. No, no preacher preacher Lawson He got really he doesn't smoke weed and I give him a dab And then he fucking what's a dab? It's like a concentration weed. It's like smoking crack for weed I would never do it and I smoked weed He started freaking out and then he was like, I gotta go guys.

And then he crawled over the table to leave the studio. Yeah, I get that. That's fucking wild. Where was this at gas? I guess there's just, oh my God. It was hilarious. So many people have gone out to that backspace high and just been kissed by the fresh air.

Like, just half dead strippers being like, But now I feel bad. Why? Yeah, you keep saying that. Because I do. You don't feel bad at all? Yeah. I was like, just half dead strippers being like. Yeah, but now I feel bad. Why? Yeah, you keep saying that. Because I do. You don't feel bad at all? Yeah, I do.

No, I feel terrible. But you gotta even, you gotta either get that and keep podcasting or we gotta wrap it up or something. No, we gotta do a little thing. Because now we're just saying how we feel bad. Well, you know, we've done 90. We've done 90. A real moment.

Dan, would you stop with the time keeping? I'll walk out. Bitch, you don't think I won't walk out? I'm going to go get me. I walked out. Bobby would be like, dude, what the fuck are you doing? Oh my God. What are you doing? You're fucking walking out. You're leaving. You're not a fucking man. I mean, I can see him. Fuck. This is good. Keep going. It's true. Yeah. But keep role playing. This is good stuff. This is what you do you do you fucking do that you walk out like you're a fucking pussy Yeah, I'm sorry then it's time to jam damn it

Y'all ready for this y'all ready to leave Y'all ready for this? Y'all ready to leave? What else do I talk about everyone keeps looking at me I'm the point guy I'm the shooting you're not playing point I'm playing point today. I rolled my ankle. I rolled my ankle with the yeah, I was fucking around the mascot Now you're just like a what do you call that a deterrent? What do you call that? You know like Willis Reed takes the floor. What do you call that? Miss out a miss psycho psychosomatic What do you call that? You know, like Willis Reed takes the floor. What do you call that? A miss- A miss-

Psycho. Missingthrope. Psychosomatic out of consent. What's that called? Somebody over there. When you just use it as a diversion. Red herring. No, but you know what I mean, the word,

you know, Scottie Pippen's got a migraine, so they just put him out there to- Distraction. Yeah, something. The moose is gonna pick a fan in the stands to take a shot from half court. That's right. We're giving away $20,000. Who do you got? Moosey the moose from section two 13. Well, somebody's upset is trouble. I think the best thing we can do is not even mention it, plow forward for five more minutes and head home.

Oh, we didn't do plugs, dude! You know what? It is a good time to do plugs. It is a great time to do plugs. I got big important plugs right now. I got two things coming out right now. My new special is coming out in theaters. Fuck that.

That's not what I need. I don't care about that. This is big news. Theaters. Theaters. May 21st joe list small ball dot-com. That's joe list small ball dot-com One night only may 21st here at the IFC Center right around the corner awesome. It's gonna be fun We're gonna sell these out Royal Oak Atlanta Tempe Bethesda, Maryland Annapolis, Maryland Pasadena California Plymouth Minnesota San Jose, California Philadelphia Cambridge, Mass Glenview Glenwood Village

Movie theaters across the country to premiere the comedy special and Tom Dustin doc Dot-com that's coming out May 9th all over the country. Portrait of a comedian? Portrait of a comedian. Tom Dustin. Oh, I have a guy who wants to produce our doc. Who's good. Let's go. Who's real good.

Because I have two guys already that have offered me. I'm at 50 grand already. Did you know that? Oh, I didn't know that. That's pretty fucking sick. Give me that guy. Okay. We're going to make it happen. It's going to be a movie about Louis J. Gomez next. That's going to really be big.

That's going to be huge. That's going to be big. The Louis movie? It's going to be Bobby with his face blacked next. That's gonna really be big. That's gonna be Bobby with his blacked out. He's like he's not cool Terrible friend, I don't know. I drank some magic brain and then I cut his skin Joe less small ball.com Tom Dustin doc.com. Yeah, also I'mcom Cleveland and hilarities in a few weeks second fuck Spokane Washington I'm at the Spokane Comedy Club May 1st through the third five shows then Albany, New York I'm at the egg theater May 15th then

Burlington Vermont and at the Flynn Theatre May 16th. And then Apple, Wisconsin. May 29th through the 31st. DanSoder.com for all these tickets. Got a pretty cool announcement next week. Stay tuned. Movie theaters? At DanSoder on Instagram and Twitter and shit. Are you doing 40 seat cinemas? Yeah, I wish. Come see me live on the road, guys.

Bring 5 Friends Tour. American Comedy Company is my next weekend, April 24 through 26. I'm actually doing an after party on the 25th at Expose Gentleman's Club. Late night, midnight, just after party with the fucking boys. You get free admission to the strip club.

If you have any tickets to my weekend, it's going to be a fucking blast. My buddy just got divorced and I'm I'm paying for him to come out and get him a hotel room. Let's just party together. My guys, my guys, it's gonna be good. Let's do some gigs together. Talk to you ready to do a gig with you. Punchline Houston. Well, now there's three of us. We could afford to fucking split the money. There's some theaters

together. Boys, let's do it. Punchline Houston. What do you put 30 May 1st through third? I'm going to be in Fort Collins, the money. We can do some theaters together, boys. Let's do it. Punchline Houston coming up. 40, 40, 30. May 1st, 3rd. I'm gonna be in Fort Collins, Colorado. Yeah, dude, the fort fucking rules. You doing the fort? Yes, I am. Snappers Comedy Club in Fort Myers, Florida.

Then I'm in Fort Worth, Texas. A lot of forts happening, folks. Oh yeah. Fort Worth, Texas, Hyenas, Dallas, Hyenas. And then me and Scott Chaplin are going to Europe. Amsterdam, Glasgow, Dublin, Manchester, and London. Then a bunch of others. So, Boston's coming up, and Long Island, and then me and Scott Chaplin are going to Europe, Amsterdam, Glasgow, Dublin, Manchester, and London, and then a bunch of others, so Boston's coming up, and Long Island,

and all this other shit. LubasOfSkanks.com is my website. Sign up for my mailing list, I do a bonus podcast that you get just for signing up for my mailing list, and yeah, check out Legion of Skanks and Story Wars. Robert Kelly, this weekend at Comedy Mothership in Austin. That's how he sold out already, I'm sure that sold out. Yeah, it's gotta be sold out.

Comedy. Fucking free fucking, that's, how's he unhappy? Bobby, Bobby's gonna then be at the Comedy Zone, Charlotte, North Carolina! Where we go, who knows if he'll show up? April 24th through the 26th, he'll be there, and he's gonna fucking murder. What if he walks out of the show?

San Diego, California, he'll be at Mike Drop Comedy May 9th and May 10th, got four shows going on, then Tampa, Florida, October 23rd and October 20th, he'll be back by the next episode to print. But also my special taping is Bobby Kelly hopefully directing my specials. Oh man, I hope he's still mad at you. July 12th, what if he directs me to do stupid shit? He goes, yeah, fucking, wear a fucking polka dot tie.

Dude, dress like a chicken. You sure, Bobby? Yeah, dude, it's hilarious. Yeah, dude, you should dress like a fucking chicken, dude. July 12th, grab those tickets now, because they're almost sold out. There's like maybe 20 tickets left for the entire special taping.

And also, Skankfest tickets are May 2nd. Woo! Trailers coming out this week, so. Nollins. Nollins. Nollins, Louisiana. Yeah. Come on out for Skankfest.

Do I have a suite? What? I don't know. Text the team. Text Rebecca. I thought it was your thing. Do you think I booked the hotel rooms? Damn.

Yes. You're always talking. You go, just tell us. Tell the people that booked the hotel rooms. They love you. The bitches? Damn, dude. Yeah. I might rent a house. I might book the hotel rooms. They love you bitches. Yeah, dude. Yeah, I might rent a house

I'm having the whole family. I um, I they make sure they put us up in a different hotel than the ones that are near the Venue like a pretty dope hotel and like the French Quarter So get that hotel get it. All right, get it guys. Thanks for listening No, we got to do a couple more minutes because otherwise they'll hear the plugs and see there's only three minutes of the go Oh just plugs little leave. Yeah, we got we gotta do six we got a pad the plug we need a bit we need a fucking good bit well I've been fucking say this come on one more time this is getting annoying I wouldn't call him again now you're freaking out you're freaking out worse than him yeah I'm not freaking out worse than him I'm here I

haven't left you guys I wouldn't leave you guys hanging high and dry. This is pretty don't leave me What an album what a record man Big plastic You should open up a fan you open up that frame and take Bobby's card out Burn it when he comes back. It's my fucking card, dude Why don't you come up with one of these, you gotta give up meat or chicken, you gotta give up ice cream or blowjobs.

Blowjobs or sugar? Blowjobs. I can't really do blowjobs anymore. Hurts my throat. Ha ha ha! Flip it, baby! Woo! Oh, there goes gravity.

Oh, he's so mad, but he won't give up now. Oh no no no! That was gold. That was good. That was good. You know why? Cause you don't do jokey like. Ah, look at this thing.

Yo, what the fuck? Ah, ah! This is how we all leave. This is how we all leave. But you're not a big misdirection guy. This is actually kind of a good new bit that we do. Where one of us leaves each at a time. I will leave the next three episodes. It's on me. Damn. You're so gracious. What if Bobby

shuts this whole thing down? He can't shut it down. Shut us down. We'll call it the dregs. That's good. That's a good name. Then we should just have a friend in a bald cap. Just fucking sit there. You know, you know, when they recast shows? This is like when Jefferson Airplane became Jefferson Starship, and they became Starship, because they had a, what do you call it, like a meeting, a suit, and then they decided they couldn't use Jefferson.

So one man was like, we're Starship, and then the other one was like, fuck. So he could be the wreck, Bobby could be the wreck. This is a good question. If Bobby left, said, I'm gonna come back, dude, I don't wanna do this fucking show with you guys anymore. Would we still do the show without him? No, that feels wrong.

Feels wrong. Feels too wrong. Yeah, I was gonna say that too. Come on. You already have a replacement. You piece of shit. That's more what you're normally doing. That's what made the blow job so fun.

I think we can't do it without Bobby. No way. That's crazy. Bobby's a fucking terrible dude. But we could do a without Bobby. No way. Crazy. Bobby's are Bobby's if I can tell. We could do a show just the three of us. We'll even call it the regs. We call it the prayers answered. Call it the sometimes. Nothing. Jersey Devils. We do it from Jersey. No. Come on boys. No, the battery park city dogs. We call it the 26 six sy sick of a way giving your fucking address. You lunatic. We gave our I get my say he gave his neighbor and come find your exact come find me on twenty six. That's a long straight people know my

neighborhood twenty six. No I didn't. He did. I don't live there. I don't live above the Dwayne Reed. No if Bobby's done I don't live above the joinery. No, if Bobby's done, we all go to, we quit. Yeah. Wow. All for one, one for all. I mean, people are going to hate that. Well, we give it a couple of weeks. We go out and then we go, wow, we're branding, we're branding. We're bringing it with Voss. Dude. Call the regs. Stupid. The regs.

The regs. Hey, guys, it's the regs. We go, no, theirs is the reg. What if we gave him Magic Mind and he started speaking clearly? He goes, hey, why did you guys do that? Also, why are we doing this to those Palestinian children? The regs. Did I hear a bleep vanilla ice?

Yeah. He goes, ours is da da da da da da. It's totally different. Totally different. Damn, you're really worried. You're sweating. No texts from Bob. Oh boy, Lewis, I feel bad for you.

You know who I feel the worst for in this whole thing? Because you feel bad. I don't like seeing you like that. Well, I feel bad that he feels bad. And it shouldn't. I feel bad that you feel bad that he feels bad. I'm excited for my chicken Caesar salad. Dan feels nothing.

Honestly, can I tell you right now? This chicken Caesar salad's about to sugar or blow jobs is a good fucking it is because I would give up time. I would give up blow jobs too. I blow jobs because you can fuck. I don't even like blow jobs. Well, that's what I'm saying. I usually when I start getting, don't do that. I do, but I prefer when I start getting blown, I very, very rarely let it finish that way. I get horny and then I'm like, I don't do fuck you. Same. And this is the other thing, for me real quick, my wife is very kind about blowing me, but

she doesn't like, she's not a blow jumper. She doesn't like it. You don't want to come in someone's mouth who's not happy about it. Yeah, I hate when a girl fucking you come in her mouth and she runs to the sink and spits it out. You like swallow it. Act like you like it. I like when she goes, spits in her hand,

and spikes it on my stomach and goes, touch down, and I go, marry me. Like I feel, what you feel right now with Bobby leaving, that's how I feel after a blow job. I'm like, I'm so sorry, I just jizzed in your mouth. That's fucking awful. No, I like that. I don't mind jizzing in your, but if a girl likes it,

if she likes to fucking swallow my seed. If she likes it, of course. Yeah, that rules. Then you go, what happened to you? Yeah. And then you go. Now some girls are fucked, cause I love eating pussy. I fuck it, I go down Yeah, that rules. Then you go, what happened to you? Yeah. Now some girls are fucked, cause I love eating pussy. I fuck it, I go down there,

when it gets all wet I rub it on my face. Especially if it's cum in it, that's the best. Yeah, we've all made that mistake. Yeah, mistake. Yeah, I would, no, I'd give up sugar over blowjobs, unquestionably. But I don't know if I'd give up sugar over eating pussy. No, I'd give up blowjobs over sugar.

That's what I mean. Yeah, blowjobs over sugar. I would keep the sugar. But to be honest with you, if it's a one moment decision. What about sugar or sauce? Hold on, hold on. If it's a one moment decision, I can never have sugar. It's not based off like a choice.

Now there's some godly force that allows me to never eat sugar again. I might go fuck it, give up sugar, so that I never have to worry about being fat again. Hmm true True, how about 1 million dollars cash or chicken Caesar's text or You can eat whatever you want. It doesn't have any negative effect on you. Oh salt Five billion whatever I want I'll take five million whatever I want watch my dad I'll make more than that. I would eat whatever I want while transporting to whatever city I want now with your dead arm can't pick that bird million dollars

I would take the ten million dollars over eat whatever you want. That's my number ten What about nine point five million fine? There's a guy watching this he goes damn. I was about to write that check dude I'm so annoyed so BS games doesn't want me They don't they stopped answering me who doesn't want you these games don't? They stopped answering me. Who doesn't want you? Beast Games. Who's gonna try to be on the list? I got through a few rounds of interviews and fucking. Where did, how did they leave it?

I think they checked my, who I was. Oh. They just aren't noticing me. But my ex-girlfriend is like, looks like she's gonna be on it. No. Well she's gonna go. Which one?

I think she's the dancer. Oh nice. She's gonna be on Beast Wars? Well she is, I don't know if she's gonna have a televised portion, I believe she's through the round where they're gonna like have her show up and like do shit and then they're gonna... Are you jealous? No. Are you jealous? Well no, so part of me was I wanted to do it because James would think it's the coolest fucking thing in the world. But then I was also like dude if I'm on a

show like that they're gonna really put me under scrutiny. They're gonna be like this guy is a Nazi. That would have a problem with this life. We're leading. Yeah, it's it would be I've had too much crazy shit to be on like a B a Mr. Beast and the reality. The N word mashup that they would put together as I'm trying to fucking befriend black people. No, trust me. I won't tell you out. Yeah, you know how they do the video of people getting older every day? It's just you going, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever. Well, I have this now with all the babies.

I'm down in Battery Park City and you meet all the parents and they're starting to, you get to know them because you see them at the playground every day. So slowly it's like, I'm a comedian. Oh yeah, you ain't got to, oh you're a podcaster. You never do a podcast? I'm like, ah. Don't listen to the got it. Podcasts, you never do a podcast. I'm like, don't listen to the early stuff. It's scary. The early stuff now. Well, now James is at an age where his friends are starting to look me up. And I told James, I was like, James, don't even tell your friends that I'm a comedian. I don't need their parents like freaking out. Like who is this

fucking guy? But in Jersey, this, the other thing about not living in fucking Lib Tardis, fucking New York city in Jersey, everyone's like, yo, says the N word, pretty cool, huh? This guy's all right with me. This guy's pretty sweet. You could watch my kid. You say it with a haw at all. Kind of hard to find around here. You know, they're kind.

They throw an A on it. Yeah, they are. Yeah, so for the most part. But like, the girl that, I don't want to say James's girlfriend, but like the girl that he likes and she likes him, they talk every day on the phone. Her dad was like, uh. No most part, but like the girl that, I don't wanna say James' girlfriend, but like the girl that he likes and she likes him, and they talk every day on the phone. Her dad was like.

No, no, no, but he told me that she was looking me up on YouTube and I was like, James, do not have your friends look me up. Just give her my name. This is where it pays to be Nate. Yeah, here he goes. I keep thinking I'm gonna do a clean hour. I'm like, I'm gonna do some clean corporate.

I had an idea to do a clean, it was gonna be called the clean 15 You should do a 15 minute special is completely clean That's smart Yes I'd go I do it and then the next the first thing I think of is like it's funny if you jizzed really hot You are filthy, but I don't think you're you put you don't present as filthy the same way that I do like if big Oh, wait, if big Jay did the clean 15, it would be like, oh shit big Jay did like that's crazy

It's like put him in a suit. Yeah, like you're very dirty, but you have to almost like, the same way Nate is very clean. But he's dark. Well, hold on, you don't realize that Nate's clean until somebody points it out. You don't realize you're really dirty

until somebody goes, Joe's filthy. You don't present that way. I'm filthy. I'm doing it tonight. You're pretty filthy. I'm doing my seventh late night. Hey, congratulations. But I showed James, I was showing James your special.

He's loving it. And then you start getting into some like really filthy shit. And I was like, oh wow. Jesus, I was just depraved. Yeah, what do you have a chomp cum? And you go. Well, I like cum is funny. It is.

Butt holes and cum and tits. You're not wrong. You're not wrong. I will never do an hour that doesn't end with 10 minutes of dick jokes. I love it. My next hour, the closing joke is specifically about me being afraid of James finding the video

of me sucking Bobby's dick. That was the story, it's a pretty long story. It's great. And yeah, it's fucking great, but now I'm fucking, if Bobby doesn't direct the special. How are you gonna get it? He's gonna direct it. He's gonna be okay.

He might not direct the special. Guys, we're gonna be scheduling an episode guys What do you think chance are the Bobby Bales guys? Let's go to the let's go to the crew Give a thumbs up if you think Bobby's coming back to the show Crew crew Taking this too personally, it's gonna be fine. Well, I feel like it was me that fucking made Bobby's arms It was it was awesome. It was so funny what you did. But he's gonna not like the rest of it.

It was us. Oh, I'm the fucking boss. But also, the first, the second episode. I will have to apologize, but it was, God, those laughs. The other big one was worse. You guys almost, this is just him grabbing his stuff. But we also made up, in that moment, we paused the show and just came back and did a great show.

Yeah. This was him blowing up and fucking leaving. Yeah. Which is crazy. I'm going to re-watch the tape. I got to. Bop, bop, bop. All right.

That was not funny. That's just us. It's never not funny to me. I want to know what love is. I think we're going to be OK. We're going to be all right. I think so. Worst case scenario, you lose a friend.

A 20 year friend. Close friend. Changed your life. 15. 17. 17. I did this show for the first time in 2011. 11, wow.

Yeah, it's just 14 years. It's been 14 years since I looked. It's been 14 years of pain. It's been 14 years since looked it's been 20 minutes that you walked up the studio. I'm doing Guns N' Roses. I know we're doing very naked ladies So it's embarrassing. You know what? Let's all walk out. Yeah, let's do it. Let's wrap it up You know what fuck this I'm out of here. I'm out of here too Let's do a photo