Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - What's Her Name

Episode Date: June 15, 2015

Robert is joined by Luis J Gomez, Tim Dillon, Casey Balsham, Chris Scopo and Deepu Gill. RiotCast.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Ya son casi las dos, nos vamos a ir a casa o hemos venido a jugar. A casa, a casa, nadie va a irse a casa. Hay que ponerse modo de racón. ¿Eres un dragón? Soy el dragón de Fireball. Ya te digo yo que las mejores historias siempre piezan con un chupito de Fireball. Bien, frío. Yo, pues al lío.

Un Fireball, sabes que la fiesta será épica. Ignite the night, con Fireball. Disfruta de sabes que la fiesta será épica. Ignite the night con fireball. Disfruta de un consumo responsable. 33 grados. ¿Yos escucha a Robert Kelly? ¿Y qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué, ¿qué to the 40th podcast on the Planet Earth. This is gonna be a clush to fire. It's podcast, no rules. What are the mic assholes? I'm sure I've already said should I regret it? Can I get a mic or?

No, what the fuck? That was trying to keep it like a comic head. I have a bunch of guys on. It's just us sitting down and he happens. Sometimes it's hilarious, sometimes it's 10 no topics, no directions. I love doing it. Play both sides of the coin. That love doing it Side to the coin

Podcasts popular I might affect somebody's life. You never know I'm a boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob bo from my stuffy snuffly nose is that I was sick for the last two days with boogers. Yeah, I know. It's the YKWD podcast Tuesday, 3 o'clock, our regular time. Sorry if the sound's a little off, but we had some fuck-ups on the board. We're back in the studios, where I cast studios above the beautiful comedy seller. We have a couple announcements I'm going to make, surprise announcements I think I can make, which I'm excited about, and not too big, you know, and they're actually not with me, it's some other people.

But it's, what's that? Oh, I turned your mic down. Yeah, my mic was off. Yeah, I know. Is one of them my brand new show on Series 6M Sports on 92 below the belt of Louis J. Gomez, premiering Monday, June 29th at APM? Oh, no, that's congratulations. Oh, I know that was one of the announcements that you had planned. No, it wasn't but now I guess it is. Oh yeah, you're Waited because I could have been the if you told me I could have made that the last one. That would have been a big one. Yeah, now it's like the first one Ever's gonna forget a scope was getting a haircut I've got hair I can do that you have another open mic That's gonna come in step on it. That's one. That was a good one. He gets one every fucking couple episodes. Sure

You don't step on my baby girls fucking nice one. That's right. All right. Well, you know who's here because of his fucking yapping mouth. It's right. The fans are excited. I was talking about Scopo. Oh The fans are excited about what about the real-ass dude Puerto Rican Radasnake Jones out Joan Jett of Comedy, Howard Cern of MMA Radio, being back in the YKD, a reading podcast. There's a lot of complaints. Can you have a new one today? I think you had some. The ultimate minority that's kind of getting in there. There was somebody else called me, oh, the Nancy Grace of Comedy. Yeah, I agree with that.

Yeah. Just a fucking fucking. Yeah, it was a face to asshole. A lot of yelling. A lot of yelling. I joke, I didn't really get it. I just, I laughed like I got it you let you said to it's not a compliment Oh Nancy Grace of I thought I'm not a compliment That's a compliment Scobo once go the around the room and tell everybody who is here all right

It's in my right. We have a very funny comedian. These are second time on the show The last time Lewis was hosting Casey Bolsham everybody. Hello, how you doing? Welcome to the YKWD. It's your first time on the show. You look for second. Oh yes. But you were in here. It was just Lewis. Okay, sorry about that. I'm sorry about that. That's okay. I gave both of you a second. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, you're actually on the show. How was it with just Lewis? It was fine. It was it was very fun It's so you selling his wife. It was just okay. It was great What the fuck is that your new technique you fucking stole all people I learned that technique from you

I don't laugh at people smashing me. I fucking lot you crazy dude. I get smashed all the time Yeah, but have you listened to the show at all you have taught me that you don't have to help the people smash you Not all the time. Yeah, sometimes when it's a good one. That was a pretty good one. Okay on her part She said I was fine and then you said you sound like his wife Well, it was great. Lewis is very great. He's the beginning of the show. Let's get warmed up I'm a professional. I have a show coming out June 29th on serious You're not announcing at the whole show what I you're not that's not you're not you're not fucking plugging Hashtag below the belt guys below the belt I didn't mean to smash you yeah

hashtag won't be on again for a long time Hashtag one and only hashtag Done all right, so we got go around the room and now it's everybody and we have wish they go miss everyone knows that okay and then we have no first-time community in tim dillen on the show i don't have a guy's yet got a lot of it we from and long island oh shes yeah long island that's crazy yeah long beach well i always say it's harder to be from uh... new york and do comedy in

york because you had to come up here so people know you as yet as the new guy you came up a little bit Long Island and then you came in in New York City because that's where it was. That's where a lot of it, you know It's happened. You can't really stay out and long it's some people do right so they're forever 20 30 years Yeah, lifetime and they think but they'll argue that things are gonna happen out there like the industry is coming out there Oh, it does come out there. Yeah, you know that no industry Thursday Yeah, you have fucking like Nick the Apollo already language coming out there. Oh, it does come out there. Yeah. You know that industry Thursday? Yeah. Yeah. And you have fucking like Nick DePolo

already laying voice. Yeah, that's a man voice. I do have a, it's not a melodic voice. No, I love it already. It's a good voice. It's like an O, if you went to an O, TB, you were getting like gambling advice. This is the voice you would get it in.

What's an O, TB? Yeah. If you got, we've been having a little sound problem. So if you can't hear yourself, please just turn your headphones up and it will fix it for you guys here. Okay. Well, you actually been having a little sound problem, so if you can't hear yourself, please just turn your headphones up, and it will fix it for you guys here. Okay. Well, you actually had that in the hammer-facing yesterday,

the headphones, the one pair of headphones, dipped all the way out on the show. We didn't know what to do, so I took those headphones. Okay, yeah. Great. Anyways. I got fucking deathly ill this weekend. I was sneezing and sneezing and sneezing, Yeah, I got fucking deathly ill this weekend.

I was sneezing and sneezing and sneezing, which I kinda like for some reason, I like sneezing. And then I was like, I do karate. Yeah, I do karate every time I sneeze. I do, I think it gets all my energy up. Like I could punch through a wall when I sneeze. That's what I'm building up to. That will be my X-Men fucking Why do you send me on the road? I don't know. I'm really you went down it pretty hard though

I know you said everybody fuck you I threw it out there. I threw it out there. No, no way There was a setup there was a setup to fucking bomb You're a professional comedian, you know, well you're right. Yeah, you're not You know you're part time. I had to work this morning. So I don't know. Yeah, I got fucking disgustingly ill. I went to Austin, Thursday and Friday for the ATX Television Festival,

where we premiered sex and drugs for the first time in front of a live studio audience audience audience and um it was uh... and we did the red carpet shit have you done red carpet stuff you've done it right? not real red carpet well here's a deal it's fucking weird but if i thought you only asked me that because you know the answer was no

and i want to accentuate my It's what I got it didn't I thought you out of have you done any rep carpet? No, no, have you done any red carpet long Island? No, no It is no red carpet I'm there I want to sound like a fucking asshole. I thought that you might have done it with Something you've done no what what one what you have 19 Something you've done no what what what what do you have 19 fucking names? You're fucking you're the next bit you the biggest thing in comedy you're the Joan Jett I mean I thought you would if the real ass dude hasn't been fucking red carpet. I've been all your names a lies That's not true. That is nothing to do with it. My name's of nothing with red carpet premier the Joan Jett of comedy

I haven't been on fucking Nancy Grace. I haven't been on TV shows yet really not so much But I'm a TV show for fucking access TV's Gotham live. There's no red carpet. Thank you very good on by the way. Thank you very much I killed it. Um you did guys see that on my YouTube page. Yeah Anyways, basically what it is you guys will all do them. I've just started doing them legitimately I've done them before but kind of weird stuff now it's you know It's a weird thing because you're standing there and there's these people There's like you kind of get corralled and there's usually a show in front of you or more famous people in front of you and They're going through and then you kind of sit in there waiting and some like some handler has you.

And you just kind of sit in there waiting and you can't. That was an old corporate bar, but you were on a farm. They were hurting you with the rest of the cows. Handler. I was pretty, I mean, I liked it. I thought it was good. They're buzzing. But I'll put these. Tell your story.

Tell your story. I have some complaints about the show. This is the first story. Can I go into your final show? Yeah, let's get into it. I'd love to. I would love to get into real ass dude. Moring.

Dude, I want to use your real ass dude. I want to bottle it and sell it at right aid for people who can't sleep. Anyways, I'm sorry, good. People if you have a fucking tricaster for that show. The real ass podcast. That show should be filmed on an I- Real ass podcast is fucking slowly, but surely coming up, the fans are engaged. for that show. The real-ass podcast. That show should be filmed on an I-Roll-ass podcast

is fucking slowly but surely coming up. The fans are engaged, the fans love it. And it's a little different than this. It isn't the same type of thing. It's a little different than all of them. No, it's not. No, it's good. I love it.

I don't know what it is, but it's a little... No, I get to tell you one thing about that show. What? You won't laugh. Oh. Look at his jeco host. I get to you one thing about that show what you won't laugh As the guy was with you on the show thought it was funny. I watched that thing for 49 minutes And I went I was I literally had to snap myself out of it was like watching CNN at three in the afternoon Yeah, we get a little real. Yeah, the real I spot real. It's fucking you yammering at two open micers Yeah, I did listen to the one you were just yelling at somebody. Oh, where I got into the argument with that guy

Yeah, I really want to know the name. I can't say the name on the show anyways, but we um The cow joke right so the red carpet thing Some people fucking do that shit like Dennis Leary fucking just this Know how to fucking do it. I I just want to say foul shit. I got to keep like you know don't say fuck don't say this don't say that because there's these little people and down at their feet and a little if there's a screen capture somebody got to me of just fucking this angry face staring off into the distance. Now Mindy Tucker, who was awesome, who just did my new headshots, everybody in New York knows, she said,

okay, when you're taking photos on a red carpet, make sure you bend at the waist and stretch your neck out a little bit and you won't look as fat. I was like, how do I not look as fat in these things? Which neck and which waist? So, all right. I know, but you won't look as fat. I was like how do I not look as fat of these? Which neck and which waist? So, alright, I know but you try it too hard now. You like a fucking, you like a Twitter fan now. Okay, over there I'm supposed to sit here like Tim and fucking whatever her name is and stare at you while you tell the story. Oh my god, he is not,

he's not nice. He's not nice. I never, you don't bring me here to be nice. You brought me here to fucking shake my rattle. I Didn't bring you to be an asshole Jesus Christ you you're being a shit. So anyways, this is the problem with women too on this show They they don't know I'm that was I said whatever her name is I just I'm about to call Tim Fett for the next hour Please that was nothing you have no idea Casey I'm about to call Tim Fett for the next hour. Please, that was nothing. You have no idea, Casey. Jesus Christ.

I like being bullied with my name being used. Yeah, fuck you. Fuck you. You're not better about it. I envy your position of who, you know, that chick, you know? It's like, but it's like I know you know my name. That's why it's just so sweet. It's a jockey retard.

Exactly. Hey, hey, hey, here we go. All right, I have a cousin that's retard. right, you step off now you go too far me cattle He's fat and her whoever now you're going to fucking far All right, sorry, I won't make fun of anybody anymore on the show. That's what we do. I'm sorry Casey We'll get the city. Oh, you do know her name Casey. You don't get you know her name no shit Casey's bug getting made fun of on the chef Casey I didn't say that I didn't say I'm not above getting me no we're all fucking friends here We're all fucking I got so many complaints about the show right now finish your fucking red cop at stories

So I guess one of the red car Well, let's get out. Let's get out here's my it. Here's my problem. I was getting to it real quick. I did the bend over at the waist. I did the stress to neck out. Every shot that they put on the internet was from the side. So fucking douche. So it's just me. I'm just leaning.

It looks like I'm taking a shit and just my side neck. It's like, how do you take care of that? Tucker, how do you take care of the Tucker? How do you take care of the side photo asshole? You had another problem one time with a person they took a picture from the side on stage on this show you talked about it and I just realized this most pictures all from the side most 99% of the pictures that are being taken of you are from the front and you're happy with them. Here's bitching because like one out of every thousand photos is from the side. What what photo is they can from the front? I don't I'm just saying you can't come no no here's how for target is to

pictures when people on stage they cropped they go to the side because they can't go in the front because there's no place to go but the side they crouch down on the side and they shoot up the last thing and you should know because you're a fucking ex-fazzo fatty fat fat fatty that's right x baby X guys go realize dude come together realize diet I tried to offer new book available I can offer Lewis cookies one time and he knocked him out of my hand I said I don't know your fucking name get these cookies out of my face. He called me a bitch. She's protein

She's real. It's just his protein. No, then you look at me. You did feel sorry afterwards. I know I was literally like the sweetest girl ever Do the pro she's from LA. She just moved here. Yeah, and she's like shit And I'm a female so she's not used to this type of fucking you know, it's just buss and balls Lewis stop physically attacking the women. I would love if that got out and that's what took him down down. I did this. And I did all the slow motions. Shepel, sloma and deep who had a sound effects, like a bone crunching. Listen, what's your problem with the show? I let's get into this. You have a couple, right? I have a few problems, man.

I think they're really all Christophe though. If we just first of all, if it all, it all boils kind of down to Christophe, not being a very good producer at the show. I think Chris is a very good producer at the show. He stepped up. Yeah, Kelly, here's what, you've got a problem with everybody who sat in that seat. Let's put it that way. Everybody who sat in that seat,

you've had a problem. That's not true. Absolutely. And you're the only person on the show that has a problem with somebody, the producer at the show. No, because nobody else is having come here. Dan Sonner is spineless, and he doesn't, why does Dan, because nobody else is having fun here. Damn son of a spine-less.

And he doesn't, so Dan is with you on this. Dan wouldn't say anything. But he's with you on this. Yes. All right, so Dan is, you've talked about this with Dan, okay. I won't say that, I'm talking about it. But that's what you're saying. So Dan Soda,

Dan, Dan, Joe Liss, Joe De Rosa. You've talked to Joe? I talked to all three of them about it. You know, I didn't talk to Joe De Rosa. They're all in, they're really upset about the state of the podcast. State of the podcast address, that's today's show. Okay. That's not the name of the show, because you don't have to show right it down everyone.

Right, right, this down. Oh, last episode. And by the way, I would say, hey, in the chat room, go right it down, but apparently you fucking Nazi spend people from the chat. Never blocked anybody except for you. That's not just a blessing. You blocked Fuck Your TV because we're bombing it we're bombing about it on Reddit

I did block him yet why? because he was doing a number of things he was distracting the chat room you're an idiot you're an idiot you're an idiot he's an idiot

he was distracting the chat room can I say something like that? you have to moderate the chat room that's the post chat room you don't fucking tell him how to run a chat room it's not my chat room Bob, here's the thing you're too famous Bob you've gone too far you're now on the border and the brink of being a TV star dude No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, then he said, I said, did you block him? And he said, no.

And I said, you do what I tell you to do. And then he blocked you. And then I was like, did you really block him? He's like, I did. I'm like, don't block him. But then we left you block. That's infuriating. But exactly, you know what we feel.

With you. When you shake a rattle. And you go off on tangents. The chat has a life of its own. I know. And you know what? And the chat master who is Deepu, fucking gave you a nice hot block.

How many people have you blocked from the chat Deepu? You and fuck your TV, that is it. That's it, guys, if you're listening to the show. And I felt really bad about it. And I just then fuck your TV. Wasn't he always, yeah, he's always there, he's always participating, but he's changing the subjects,

a lot of the time he's distracting the audience. It doesn't matter, you're an idiot. Here's what you're done. The chat room, there's another show, while the show's always participating, but he's changing the subject. A lot of the time he's distracting the audience. It doesn't matter, you're an idiot. Here's what you're done. The chat room, there's another show while the show's going on. Let me say this, please. No, I won't let you say this. Here's my finger. There's something though, some people, what you do,

and I've done it to my own chat room, okay? The show going on, and I've come into the chat room while the show is happening, when I'm not here, and I'm like a guest host, I hijack the chat room. Now it's all about me. When it should be about the show is happening when I'm not here and like a guest host, I hijacked the chat room. Now it's all about me, when it should be about the show going on. You're not. You won't even let me say what I was gonna say.

You went into the chat room and hijacked it. Not true. What was he doing? He was just, you know, the fact he's there is enough to distract everybody's. Okay, hold on, time out, Berkweisher. Shut up, shout out, shout out, Berkweisher came into the chat room, I'm walking up here

Like people are supposed to listen to me What are you, a fucking stop bullying people Shut the fuck up It's been five minutes since I said I haven't even been able to say my first bomb Every time I bring up something You guys fucking, now you start yelling at me You guys fucking bullying me out of my mouth

Don't use my bully No, you're bullying me, you're bullying You fucking fat bully finger at me like I'm gonna fucking bully you out of my mind. What are you gonna do? Go ahead. Don't use my bully. Against me. No, you're bullying me. You're bullying, wanting to fucking fat bully. Finger at me like I'm a bully. You had a fat finger eight months ago. Now it's muscular. God. I'm doing finger crunches right now.

I can't wait to get fat. See that in the chat? Get on the fucking chat. What do you want? So the chat room, Berk-Krysher comes in the Legion of Skanks chat room all the time. Yeah, it's a big fucking deal. People get pumped about it.

You start chatting with people. The chatroom has a life of its own while the show is going on. I agree. When people are watching the show or listening to the show, they're also looking at porn, they're also reading blog. Yeah. They're all sitting in a million other things. The fact is, you're fucking fingers.

I taught a part of Italian. Well, just can you not do that finger, you keep fighting. Sit on hands. God. Can I just say that? I don't think, I think you should have blocked good Say what you gonna say well on this show we use the chat room a little differently we read lines from them Specifically like during a segment of the show on your show. They don't necessarily do I guarantee everyone in the chat right now

I was agreeing with me. I don't think that you should have. Can I say what this what I think? I don't think you should have blocked fuck your TV You shouldn't block somebody who's been in the chat since the beginning It's a huge fan shut up shut the fuck up you you're bullying me. I know you just stop me from doing that. It's my show I don't think you should have blocked him. It's a temporary block. And his your block was a joke I don't think I it's a you should unblock him and you shouldn't block it not from the chat If you're a joke is a lot if people aren't talking about the topic and the show, if they change the subject for a minute, you'll be like, you'll fucking block them and try to do that.

Okay, listen, I'm gonna be real with you. That's like, I got it, good. I'm gonna be real with you. People are just bringing up LOS, like crazy, you know? And it's just like, hold on, time out, so that. So we're bringing up Legion of Skanks and you block them for bringing up Legion of Skanks.

Why is that, why is that a problem? I started too, because. Legion of Skanks was born out of this show. That's why Legion of Skanks is popular now is because the show existed. I don't understand Just like people started talking about open Anthony on fucking this show you wouldn't be like oh there can't block no dude It's all it comes from that isn't it like a radio There's a customary in radio to like not bring up other TV please so we can see you I don't have that set of friends out but isn't itary on radio to like respect or actually it's more like on TV

You know you don't bring up you don't bring up other networks. You don't talk about other shows during the show Not if they were friends dude Yeah, listen this last episode was the first time it happened I'm trying to Bobby Kelly to host for big J next week on Legion's tanks big J's out of town He's gonna come and host the show. I would have to listen. Here's a deal. I know what deep was doing and I understand it podcast terrorism. No, what he's trying to do is trying to he's trying to brand this and his thing and our thing and I understand it but look it if people are

bringing up Legion of Skanks or Opin Anthony or the Cootmius show you know look we support all those fucking shows anybody who's on this show and then grew a podcast out of this show or has their own we support them. Legion's a Skanks, Jay, Dave, even this fucking animal. You know, you know, I mean look, even I mean I joke about real-ass dude but I mean I support his fucking boring podcast if he wants to do it. You know what I mean? So if they're gonna, if they're gonna, if that's the fans showing up in that chat room, if that chat room becomes that, then that's what it becomes. And the way to change that, or if it changes is, that's an organic thing that happens.

I would understand my area. It's like blocking people on Twitter for me. If you follow me, and if you're trying to be funny, and if I get it, if you don't follow me and if you're trying to be funny, and I get it, if you don't follow me and just being a dick, goodbye, fuck off. But if you're a fan of mine, you wanna come in and talk about his stupid show or what if they were talking about, anybody, it's cool me his podcast, I already langs, and that's all it was.

But I get what you're doing, you're being, you understand where he's coming from. He's being protective of this show Because lock somebody from the show he shouldn't have done that That's it's a by the way, hold on let me say this unread it that guy went on reddit and said dude fuck that show now I'm not gonna go listen to the show anymore. Oh first of all. I don't care about that Listen, I don't care don't don't threaten me With your fucking fan shit if you don't want to be personal, no, look, I don't like what people threaten me.

I'm not your fan anymore because, hold on, let me, let me, hang on, let me say this. Don't fuck with my life. Don't fucking treat me like shit, okay? Don't be a fucking asshole to me. And then when I respond to that, threaten me with I'm not your fan, fuck you.

Go for you. Hang on, hang on. You weren't a fan to begin with. Because if you're a fan, the immediate response, shit dude, I was just kidding. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I fucked up. Thanks, Kase. You understand? That's the fucking. So his fucking, he wasn't a fan of mine. That's not, you're not your miscellaneous. he wasn't a fan of mine. That's not you're not you're not a fan of my Missed I said it's not you You're fucking fan shit Bobby hold on. I'm talking to my fingers. You shouldn't you shouldn't you don't block anybody without me saying block This is my point that I'm making though. Okay. You're letting these guys make decisions for your show That aren't necessarily the right. I don't think that's the right decision. He it but it's fine. He can make those wrong decisions and it comes up when it out It comes out in the wash and that's fine because he was coming from he wasn't coming from fuck Bobby

He was coming from let's fucking let's make sure this podcast that's a little it's a little power trippy It's a little power trippy to pull it to go on not you're just no this is just how you see it You to actually recommend that when you do live events You do moderate it because chat just gets out of hand somebody's spamming yeah, dude Obviously somebody's posting their fucking like go to my website go to my website. Yeah Yeah, go to LLS go to LLS. That's what the chat room's fucking saying. I've seen it's not with that guy Say that's what that's all the fuck comments work. I've seen come I've seen kumia I've seen fucking ONA block people hang up on people. people. I'm seeing there's a reason there's a line I'm saying that's not the line. Well, how do you know the line? How do you know his line? Why is your line the right line?

I'm telling you my line. Okay, why is that the fucking right line? Why is that the right line? I'm saying Why is the way you believe why is the way you believe? It's because it's my show So did you ask me my complaints or not do not? No, but I'm saying that you're giving them like their facts That's a line. There's a fucking line. There's not a fucking You can decide where your line is all you want. I don't I personally don't believe I yeah I think that if somebody of above me

Did the same thing? I don't think you'd have a problem with it. What do you mean? I think if Anthony Cume had just blocked somebody because they were doing the same thing, you'd laugh at it, think it was funny. That's not true. Are you crazy? You would think it was, you'd go dude, that was bulls. I think that he could have one of his fucking guys, if rat or one of his fucking producers,

was blocking people in the chat because they were chatting away in the chat and they weren't doing anything that was legitimately disruptive to the fucking show or being hateful toward the show. This guy was a fan of the show, might understand, I don't even know what you blocked him for. All my understanding was this guy was complaining and he was going, hey dude, and all I said to him was, yeah, they blocked me too.

I'm gonna bring it up on the show. Because I was fucking blocked from the show. Yeah, you blocked as a fucking guy. I don't know what I was blocked as until you just told me that. So I'm coming to it. You really think I would have you, hang on a second, stop, stop. Be fucking intelligent right now. Do you think I would block you, hang on a second, stop, stop. Be fucking intelligent right now. Do you think I would block you from my chat?

Yes. And then have you on my show? Yeah, it's a separate thing. No, it's not. Do you put block me from the chat? I still can go to the chat. I'm blocked. No, it's definitely, you're definitely allowed now.

But it was a gag. It for you, the other guy, I'm telling you right now, you should never ever block anybody. I'm the one who, you know what I'm saying or at least go do this one with a block so Bobby you completely agree with me I do agree with you that he should block I just don't like when you fucking say shit like it's fact Move on yeah, thank you fuck you scope oh you're my Just problem with the show. What's what what's your problem with me? This is go boss what's problem with the show. What's your problem with me? This is Scopo's...

What's your problem with me? What's your problem with me? I'm not the problem. You're the best. You're unfuckin' believable, Robby. You're one of the most talented performers I know in the world. Then you know what? Fuck Deepu and Phnomkin.

Go ahead. What's your problem with him? Tim, can you please say something? I am angry. I don't know why, but I'm also angry. I'm mad at that someone got blocked I think the integrity of the show is in question. What you know? I thought you told me right now I want to talk about right now. I wish the topic was rape

We're gonna stand up more connected to it. There's a deal when Lewis comes down. Yeah, you understand this This happens if you go back to the history of the show right and listen to every show that Lewis is on Yeah, it's a deal when Lewis comes up. Yeah, you understand? There's this happens. If you go back through the history of the show, and listen to every show that Lewis is on, yeah, there's some turmoil with somebody that's all the show. Go back. Bobby, go back in the history of the show

and watch Bobby project all of his own insecurities and things that he does with other people onto me and his friends. Yeah, yeah. What do you mean? You have fucking read? I thought I was perfect though. You just told me I was shit.

Well, don't say things like that. But you just might have, my real feelings come out and you say things like that. What are you talking about? You fucking, you're the only person I know that's ever had a problem with Joe List, the nicest person in the world. Well, okay.

Okay. What was the problem with Joe? I don't remember. I know you guys were arguing for like two weeks. We did not agree for two weeks. We had one thing and then we called each other up and talked about it and we fucking dealt with it and he understood it Bobby and I understood it. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry We're fighting with each other right now when this is about Chris Copo and David. Let's go to school I'm sorry go back to scope oh scope was a shitty producer for the show

Kelly Fasucco was a shitty person, but she wasn't a shitty producer for the show Like he would all right define that like school Fasucco is a shitty person, but she wasn't a shitty producer for the show. He defined that. Like, here's like, Scopo is a better comedian and a better person than Callie. But Scopo is a nightmare of a producer. Very uncreative. A little bit. Jesus. He's too in his own head about the way he fucking looks.

Dude, I've been trying to get, I've been trying to, wait a minute, stop. What? Are you saying because he's worried about stop digging muscles? Sorry. I will cut off your arms in the shot. Sorry. It'll just be your lip, your fat person. What's your name? I was not a powerful man before starting yelling at me.

Still, ha ha ha ha ha ha. Ah man, it really makes, I just gotta get back in a shape one more time. I just have to, I remember there was a point, I think two years ago, maybe a year and a half ago where you actually, we were both losing weight. Yeah, I pushed the straight, Christmas day. And you wait for more pounds in you.

You wait more, and I was like, I'm doing it, and then I, I don't know what happened. I would have just kept going, and I would have beat you to this. Yeah. And you probably would have fucking spiraled out of control. Did you just do diet, or were you exercising? Just diet.

Like, just cutting out everything? Cutting out, yeah, sugar and grains. Nice to work for a diet and LA where you've got to get people pregnant lady hormones and then it sucked all the fat out so I can hook you up if you really yeah you can get me pregnant lady hormones. So basically it tricks your body into thinking that you're pregnant so that your body like you eat off your own. I think I think our bodies are ready to think they were pregnant. He's a very huge humanity in the beginning It's pregnant

I'm like, that was a way better way as I hear it Like you literally say your body I tried to jump on the grenade and it didn't Yeah, it's interesting Your body thinks your pregnant so it feeds your fake baby with your own fat and then you just pee it out Did you want to walk the other guy? Those blocks are only for that day so they can come back. Oh, okay, great. Yeah. Okay. So how much is this cost?

Am I going to grow like, am I going to have a baby? No, there's no hormones that happen. I mean, you go on like the lowest calorie diet but because you're eating your own fat, like you don't get hungry. So you go for like 21 days and you eat the certain diet and you give yourself a little shot. I know, but can I just hear it? You're never going to hear it.

Don't. No, it was really interesting to me because like, I know, but can I just hear it? Don't, I just want to hear it. It was really interesting to me, because I could see it work. I mean, I'd see people be like, I'm hung, the, I'd see all the problems and everything with it, but yeah, like I was giving people shots of B12 in the ass, like I'm so not qualified to do that

and showing people how, they're like diabetic needles and you put just a little bit of this hormone, it doesn't give boys boobs, it doesn't make you like, a wine ear and it just takes your fat and you flush it. I've just really. You'd pay it out. You drink like three liters, like three big old bottles of water. What do I eat? What do you use our beats? Well, if you're shot, you're saying no, no, no, that went along with it so that your energy wasn't down because you're not even fine. How many shots do you get? You do a shot a day and it's just like to see you every day. You're doing animal experience. I'm so close to fucking doing that dude.

I am so close to doing fucking Elevanger's fucking just a steroid run just to get in like like. It's G H. I want to do some telling you dude. I really love G H. I'm not gonna really look at you. Fucking Lewis. How is Lewis the only one that cares about me?

Changes and they did not terrible. So let's go back to your grabs. I like this. I like this a lot of you guys hate the YKWD I don't hate why I go and listen to it with my son and I go on the chat. You listen to the nothing to do Nobody's talking about I listen because I'm a fan of Robert Kelly's here's I'm not making this up dude I I started listening to the show before I was on the show I understand that listen So all the guys Dan Joe Both Joe Deroza. Yeah, hate the show now that while these are all their grapes. I will speak for everybody speaking for him I'm speaking for you understand that I am now Joe Joe Deroza Dan Soda and yourself. Yes, you're done with my friendship.

I'm done with all of you. You know what, if that's what has to take the save of the YK2BD podcast, then I guess all of us are gonna have to be done with their friendship. Did all those guys, were all those guys producers at some point or they were just on all of them? No, they were all regular. They were all regular.

They were all regular. They were all nobody's. And then I had them on the show and they became somebody's. And now they're, you know, that's what happens in the wild. They turn on you When the young lions and then I'm kind of an old the lion one of my eyes doesn't work right You know, my main is kind of ripped off Yeah, I got like a scar going across my mouth. I'm in the line that loses to the zebra in the video These guys are all fucking all right. They're gonna you know kick me out of the pride. I'm gonna go fucking Rome the

desert. You know with my podcast with Deepu and inside of an elephant corpus. Yeah. I'm just gonna appreciate it. We got it. It's something else. Other animals. More examples. More. Whatever. So you know what? These guys should just get the bomb band there if we're just sitting here and not even attempting jokes I'm trying I'm trying to get me. I'm trying to choose a side. I haven't decided one side Take the fucking side of the side. I think I'm gonna go with Robert. I don't know though. You motherfucker I gotta I gotta side with him. I don't know I'm not even a dancer been on hammer fisting He's been and I want to be on that MMA vodka. I don't know anything about MMA

But I feel like I can add something. I know very little about this podcast fight. Like the entire I didn't have more opinions. I didn't know that what I didn't know there was a current. I was told me like you're going to get I wish I knew it would be getting to fight and you got to you got to choose a side. But here's the thing to look I'm out against Robert. I don't want this to be misconstructed. I didn't know there was an undecurrent of hatred and resentment towards me. Yeah, I thought I, you know, I'm not perfect.

I, I, I, I try to, you know, I try to, I try to be, you know, I try to do the right thing. Sure. As much as I can, I'm, I'm definitely flawed. I'm a recovering alcoholic and drug addict. Yeah, I'm a fucked up person. I'm the first to admit it, but apparently with these guys, it's not you. I'm not a showbiz.

It's not you in showbiz. Yeah, it's the showbiz. No, no, because there's another undercurrent that we might not get to today. But between Dan, Joe, Joe, Dero, and these guys, in this guy here, the rattlesnake. Apparently, there's things. I have never heard any complaints from Joe or Dan.

Well, apparently, they don't talk to you because they don't like you. They don't like you. They will not be honest with you. Oh, OK. On a personal level. I like you personally. That's why I'm being honest with you, OK? All right, so go ahead.

Here's the thing, OK? Scopo, obviously, you scopo is a fucking really good. I love Scopo. OK, he's a funny comment. You don't have to stop with the fucking, I'll take a bullet form, and then fucking tell him he's a cunt. Shit. Just say it. He needs to gonna stop with the fuck out, take a bullet form and then fucking tell him he's a cunt. Just say it.

He needs to be fired from the producer position, okay? Who might, okay. Here's the thing I really maybe even started thinking about this, okay? Okay, so we should fire Scopo. Not from the show, he can still be on the show. Well, why would I need him on the show? I'll be honest with you.

It's gonna be really, there's a real hard push to keep him on microphone if he's not producing the show. But we'll figure that out, okay? I'm not saying fire Scopo, I'll figure it out. Oh, so you're helping. You're producing the show. But we'll figure that out, okay? I'm on St. Fire, Scopo off the ground. Oh, so you're helping? You're helping the show. Are we starting a board? I'm probably even helping Scopo

in the long run, okay? So here's the thing, I started thinking about this the other day. There was a guy on Twitter who tweeted at me, he's like, Scopo, why haven't you gotten Zach Amiko on YKWD? Right. And Zach is our friend and he's fucking,

he's a shitty, one of the shittiest comics I've ever met by entirely. He's a terrible comedian. But it doesn't ever stop me from bringing people to show. Kason Point, you're sitting there. Exactly, you gave me my shot, okay? Yes.

So Zach, you're a comedian. One of the worst. Okay. And you're still all. Now I'm really creeping, I'm almost at mediocre. Yes, you're very close. So, some day you'll get a festival. So Zach, not now, but someday.

We'd look, dude, a couple of years now, but try hard if I get a writer or two. I must be pops, dude. Don't, though. So just play my mind. So this guy tweets at me, he's like, why don't you, and Zach does a realist podcast with us. And Zach is a fucking dude.

He's a, I know you don't like the show. You've only listened to it, and you say it's boring in me, right? I've listened to it five times. But listen to me, Zach. It's not that it's, it's not that it's, here's the problem with your show. Okay. If you should just do it by yourself. It's a monologue show.

It's not a dialogue show. You can't have dialogue, like I couldn't have, I couldn't just sit here with Scopo and me and Depot. I need a guy like you on who's gonna tell me to go fuck myself. I need a new person on who I don't know. I need a group. I need two people to sit here and stare at you. No, but I need a guy like you on who's gonna tell me to go fuck myself. I need a new person on who I don't know. I need a I need to be able to sit here and stare at you. No, but I need a If you weren't here, believe me, we would have a conversation. Yeah, what I'm saying is is that I need I need people that come against me

You know what I mean? Or have different opinions. It's why there's always a regular and then new people I can't have all new people because it would be very quiet. You know what I mean? That's my thought process in having this show every week. There's always somebody that is comfortable enough to tell me to go fuck myself. Right. Can I stand? I feel like it would have been odd if I came on and I was like, Here's a list of 10 things I hate about your show.

Right. Like I feel like that would have been a weird move. It would have been like for me. It might have been good. I have to say, next time I will do that. Like if I was like, I don't know you, bud. Thanks for having me, Robert. I know you're really successful.

You show's over and I'll tell you why. This guy's an idiot. I'm sure this guy's a rotating voice. Remember my little time? Well, I'll be my father, I'm the big green Jewel rules along. Hey, Bobby, I'm going to Israel this summer. Yeah.

My father was 10, nine clubs. Listen, here's a deal. Is that you, your show, it's just, I was sitting there waiting for the funny, and it's hard to be funny when you're, you know, if you were by yourself, I think it would be funnier because you'd be the audience, you'd be the guy, you'd be, look, I don't know,

it would be the guy you're yelling at too you know either way okay You're right to your opinion on my show. Yeah, but Zach Zach's a fucking Zaks a sniper. He's really fucking funny. Don't use my terms. He's a sniper kid That's I fucking sucked a dick for a stick and I made up the word sniper. Yeah, let's go to the chat room real quick Go to the chat chat. Lewis is right about everything. Yeah Sebastian That says Lewis finally said it. Thank you. Yeah. All right. What else? Brick top says Lewis has been reading the YKWD Reddit. It's about to go down I have been reading that by the way. I don't know. What is it? Reddit there's like a mini forum devoted to this podcast

Yeah, and it's unmoderated because I haven't even been able to go and be a fucking Nazi and kick people out of it You fucking terrorists. We stop yelling at the poor kid and stopping so aggressive. They should go to you She said I put it down All things about I'm gonna Pire everybody I will I will come in and I will save the show Okay, go you don't have to I you don't have to save my show Bobby you are too big to do this anymore What do you call me fat again? No? Superstar I thought you said I couldn't move to push a button too big to do this anymore do you call me fat again? no you are a superstar

i thought you said i couldn't move to push a button go ahead what do you got mookie phillips says i hate when people talk about something other than the show in here for too long so i understand that's our cast it right now that's that's what i best you got on your side of the world that was it that was it that was it that was it that's what max jenner says i I wanna cuddle with Bobby. Just spoon up with him with his arm run, my arm.

Okay, what else you got? Buddy, see, Buddy says, Bobby needs some Stavros calming influence in his life. I do, I really want Stavros to move. I can't wait, soon as Stavros moves to New York, he's my baby bear, he's my new guy. I'm gonna move out to New York when Stavros moves here. Bye, Stavras is a great guy

I don't know how you can move I shit me this is what I regret I regret the day I Came to you and I said don't move to LA. Yeah, it would have made me so happy just to see you at the like in death squad Telling telling Joe Rogan dude you show needs You show needs, don't you need to get rid of Red Ben, he's fucking in it. This guy, he's pulling fucking push and button. Come on, bro. Oh my God. Just to see Joe grab you by the neck and squeeze.

I really do think you should move to LA now. Where you're at now? I'm not even joking. I can't now. I'm not even joking. Where you're at right now, I think you should move. To LA. I think this would be a perfect time for your career.

To move to LA, physically the way you look. Right? Yeah. I do look good. Did you live in LA? No, I'm gonna stay here. Yeah, I don't.

That's my point. I want him to go to the other coast and be over there. Let's go. Yeah, just do the real ass fucking each coast. I always scope. I was right now. Give me a look like dude. I'm gonna fucking fist fight you after this show. No, I know I'll lose Why would you lose? You don't got a lose just for him? He fucking dude, you don't have to fight what do you have to fight fair? It's not a fucking you know fighting for the belt dude He's got one chance to hit me with a fucking bottle or a bat or whatever he's gonna have and if he misses He's dead. All she do is this look

I don't want to fight you as soon as he turns away on his roller blades you smack him in the back with a fucking shovel handle then when he goes down you carve fucking shit dick on his forehead with your keys what do you got so Zach's really funny dude and so this guy tweeted hey winning any exact NYKWD and it's been like four or five months where I've been telling scope you should really try to get him on it's not like you don't know if you're learning any exact NYKWD and it's been like four or five months where I've been telling Scopey You should really try to get him on it's not like you don't bring in young comics you do I do all fun So he just hasn't done it hasn't done it has done it so the guy tweeting me this and then I tweeted the guy back and also at Scopeo Yeah, cuz Scopeo doesn't want Zach making him look bad on two separate shows, but is he make you look bad?

He goes after me. Are you scared? look bad. He goes after me. Are you scared? This is weird. I feel like he goes after me. This is the problem with these that you, okay? And Dan and all who gives a fuck? Really? Who gives a fuck? Here's the reality of it. And I believe this. We're all fucked up to each other. We're all fucking mean. We all do mean shit. We say fucked up shit. You know, you try to revolve, you try to apologize, you try to move on, you accept apologies, you give apologies, but we're all fucked up, we're comedians. But in reality, we all give a shit about each other. I love all you guys.

I love all my friends. We have to take what Dero's and Dan were saying. But no, it's funny that it's like it's it's it's I understand that it's a you know waste of fucking time To go down that road because We don't have that we're already past you know our 20s are gone It's our 30s 40s 50s and it 60s maybe and you're done as far as comedy goes oh and and then it's you know it's it's like look man I get it the gossip the

resentment it's fun it's really fun to have and to hold on to and to fucking talk about and hate watch people well look I get it you know I don't even I don't give a fuck that these guys are kind of hating Well, look, I get it. You know, I don't even, I don't give a fuck that these guys are kind of hating me behind my back. I get it. I'm a fuck. You know that none of them said anything that I'm saying, right?

I'm saying, listen, I'm saying, I made up everything. I know, but anything. Here's the thing about the show or about me, or whatever. They really didn't say anything, dude. But my point is, you're lying. I know you did.

Because I swear to God, we talked about you. What? I get it it but in reality we all like you care about scope oh I care about you you're a fucking idiot but I I care what happens to you and your kid I you know and as far as these podcasts I mean the chat rooms and the fans Legion just skanks I you know you can't I you're you can't hate Legion to Skanks, I, you know, you can't, I, you're, you can't hate. Legion just skanks fans. I fucking love them. Those are my fans. Even though maybe they don't all like my show,

but they, you know, they like that show better because they smoke weed, they fuck bitches, and they're a little more edgy than me, but I'm just in a different spot. I don't know, so I really try to always make everything an analogy for the octagon. And it kind of reminds me of when Matt Hughes beat hoist Gracie, you know You went into that fight. It was like well, you know a lot there was a lot of shit talking and hoist Gracie kind of broke it down like this He was like mad Hughes even if he wins this fight even if you think he's a better fighter than me He wouldn't exist without the foundations that I built in this sport You know, so that was just kind of like just the idea of a concept.

Yeah, Opie and Anthony, I mean built that, you know, but before that, it was Colin Quinn and Tough Crowd built what we have before that it was Lanny Bruce. No, no, you know what I'm saying? It's like what we have today, you know, I, me and Burr and Patrice and Dane, we started in Boston and came here and met Boston and Keith and Colin and Norton and, you know, and then you guys, we kind of, you know, Big J was brought up by Keith and,

and he met me and little Kav and, you know, all, what these fans don't get sometimes, what we forget is that we're all from the same family. Yeah. That's it. No matter what we think about each other at times, because I've known I've had problems with everybody. And I've had problems with fucking Colin, me and him

have fought, but that shit goes away. It really doesn't fucking matter in the long run, because we all give a shit about each other. I mean, what you say about Scopo, you give a fuck about Scopo. I still haven't said my first problem with Scopo. What's your first problem so this kids act as i tweeted back at the guy yeah i said um

yeah i said that i was like scopos and for the same making look bad and scopo taxing is like to fuck the fuck that was a conti thing to say i was like dude i was like i'm busing balls i tweeted at you you cycle path i didn't like tweeted it behind your back what you did you tweeted it to me the white eight wp podcast that's you. Yeah. So that's me. That's technically him. That's me.

I actually had to be here in a two. No, you're in a two. That's me. That's my show. Either way, he's the one. Who that represents me, dude. I know who's that's my brand. He tweets in front of me.

He's with me all the time. Yeah, but I tweet too. You're what he war doing right now. Huh? You don't even know what you're arguing with. I'm just telling you that he's right in that thing. I don't know. I'm just saying, I wasn't saying it behind his back. I wasn't high to get from him.

I was making a joke. Sending his mad, but then he gets on the phone with me. No, I thought he was pissed off. We even talked like a week. So he's fucking pissed off of me. We trashed him on the podcast last week. And I was like, oh, he's fucking. I'm not pissed.

I'm never pissed off. I thought he was pissed off. I thought you were pissed. I thought you were pissed off. It's beautiful that you said that so let me make this point okay So he calls me up on the phone and he's like dude, you know Well, you know, you know that it kind of is widening exact on the show because he's gonna come and he's gonna trash me He's gonna just fucking because I'm the only guy who's like a comment. I fucking exposing him right now. Yeah So so my dude what the fuck is wrong with you?

I was like if he's gonna be if he's gonna be funny on the show and he's gonna make the show better Why wouldn't you have him on the show? I don't think you'd lose scope oh like right? I think you're ever shot Yeah, I do I don't think it's What I think I think he fucking and I would help like if I saw an opportunity I would help I also know some people What that was kind of I mean you just exposed them dude. It's not exposing anything. I'm telling the truth It was that was a conversation you guys had this is this place. That was a private conversation Just exposed on a I care more about you Bobby Then this stupid conversation we had and it's a lesson in comedy

Sorry, I'll pass in two years. We'll be good. Probably not. But listen, maybe three. I'm gonna finish. Okay. So I'm going to like scope. Oh, dude, what do you care for the butt of a fucking joke on a podcast? You have to be careful what you say to him now. Cause he'll fucking just yap it on a podcast. That's not true. This isn't a fucking. He didn't tell me as herpes. Okay. See, we're this thing. We're having a conversation about the podcast. That's dormant. We're having a conversation about the podcast

It's dormant This is why this is why he can be on Mike's I'm not saying pick scope off the show as a producer I'm getting more concerned and he does this a lot. He's like do come on man You're fucking make me look bad on the show I'm not talking I See off you come hang on let him let you go you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you're like the whole, with the whole, like me, you repeat yourself. You're right. I am genius. On and on and on.

And I don't like, I know what you're doing. Don't think I don't know what you're doing. You're calling me all these happy things. So I don't fucking, I'm not a fucking moron. But my self-esteem is low today. So I will take it. I will accept it. Okay.

Go ahead. With the whole Zach thing, honestly, he doesn't ask to be on personally. So, I just forget, you know what people have fucking asked me to be on the show? Yeah. I literally get two or three people a week. And I have to put them on a list to try to get them on. He just doesn't ask me. And then, I just forgot about him, and he'd keep asking. And then I was joking around with you. He was like, he's gonna fucking destroy me. And then you were like, no dude, he shouldn't have, he shouldn't be like that.

You should get him on the show for the show. You shouldn't be worried about how you look on the show that's a Kelly for stucomo She used to be like hey mate. You're saying I'm not funny people are gonna think I'm not funny Go just be funny you fuck everyone It's 90% making fun of how fucking stupid I am okay the whole show is that so they're good healthy smart people They get it They understand the way the world works. No, but who gives a fuck?

The bottom line is it's a funny show and it's a quality product. And we're all the, do Bobby gets called Fat on his own show all the fucking time? It's all we can think. I'm fighting every moment I wanna say it. Casey left.

I just, well I'm just thinking like, I mean, not everybody's like, like not like, I mean, the relationship that you guys have on Legion of Skanks is so different than anything else. Like, and I feel like you she makes it good probably like, kind of like being like the person like that. Listen, my show, my show, I, the reason why I like Legion of Skanks, the reason why I like certain shows, like that is because, like, the reason why I like certain shows like that is because look, my show, I don't want my show to be a show where people are afraid to come on

because you're just smashing people. If it happens, it happens. You know what I mean? I don't wanna have this set up where she's afraid to come on because she's just gonna be attacked. Yeah, I don't like it. I don't, I'm not at that, but I'm also not into those. It might be because of where I'm at. In my, listen, let me just say this, it's maybe where I'm at in my life, where I'm a little, I don't know if I went to a different

place where I'm, look, I'm not, I'm not fucking out all night trying to get pussy and do comedy and fucking be a badass and all that shit anymore. I'm, you know, I'm at a different place in my head. You know what I mean? So, I can admire that. I admire, I see what you fucking gonna cruises and fucking chicks and fucking metal and pot. Fucking chicks, are you crazy? Well, you're not not you, but like that whole fucking thing.

I get it, but my show's not like that. Not everybody has to be in that mind frame. You are, here's a problem, Robert. You have, you're becoming a fucking celebrity. You got a kid, you have a family now, you have all the shit going on. I've evolved. You're beyond the level of it.

I'm evolving. I'm producing this podcast. So here's the problem. Maybe he likes it. Here's no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, He doesn't okay He's you trust you before it's people it's not even Kelly was even a great I'm sure you like that a little bit could you it's not even a great producer It was that you were really hands-on back then and you're entrusting it with these two fools Okay, what's wrong with D. Poo? He's a he's a Nazi and in all honesty He's he's got a little bit of a fucking attitude

German your Indian No, didn't you win the contest to be it? He wasn't my vote. I'm gonna be honest He's he's got a little bit of a fucking attitude. You're a fucking German. That's why you're Indian. Hi. Didn't you win the contest to be it? He wasn't my vote, I'm gonna be honest. Well, we're gonna have that hot chick here. Yeah, my show would be fucking perfect. It would be funny. Every, only be at five o'clock and beyond.

And she would have fucking missed nine. I do it. Tents were so fucking nice. Hang on, all right. We gotta stop real quick. Liz is here. We have an announcement to make. Liz come over here. Sit next to me, Bubba. Are you guys officially announcing that they're going to kick

out of the Comedy Cellar? You can't announce it on the show. I really, I'm going to fucking push for that this weekend. Okay, today, finally, finally has its T-shirts. Have come in, let's unveil the T-shirt right to the camera up there. Oh yeah, give me the right, look at that right there. Comedy seller T-shirts are in and they have all sizes. They have women's and gray, right? Yes, I'll show you. Don't tell them that size.

We know what that size is. This is the biggest size. We have, oh, look at that. Look at that, right there. Hold it up right there. Let's see. Casey, put it on. That's for my wife.

Nobody puts the saw to accept my wife. Unless you want to put it on later. If he leaves, please. If she puts it on on camera right now, she could put it on, Bob. And Liz, speaking to that microphone, where can we get these? These could be purchased at the Comedy Cellar and at the Village Underground.

And we have a gift shop in the Village Underground where open Wednesday through Saturday. Yeah, maybe that's the microphone. Yeah, anytime you want to buy a t-shirt, you could pop on over to the olive tree or to the Comedy Cellar. I love it. So now Liz is so like spunky and full of like energy and real life, but as soon as there's

a microphone in front of her, she sounds like a veterinarian. You know when you want me to say, buy the t-shirt. Buy the t-shirt right now. They just have, they have a brand new, which I just went over and saw today, a merch. What is it called over there? A gift shop. They have a gift shop at the Village Underground. It's going to be open. It's already open, but they're actually going to, they're working out now with the TV as swings open. There'll be a

person sitting in there on Fridays and Saturdays, correct? Wednesday, Wednesday through Wednesday? Saturday. Saturday. So you can go there and get one of these great t-shirts. How much are they? They're $20.20 bucks. Comedy sell a t-shirt. That is really cheap. I know. It's really going to $25.20 bucks and you can also, can you get them online? You can. If you send an email through the Comedy Seller website, it would be more than happy to. That is a lot of extra steps. Yeah, that's a lot. That is weird. Let's hang this up. Let's hang this up. Hang this up. That's yours. I know. He's hanging it up. Let's hang this up. Hang this up.

That's yours. I know. He's hanging it up. Where's the one that's hanging up? Give it to, I mean this. That's your way. Love it. Love it.

Love it. Love it. So Chris, why aren't you supposed to be prepared for this, Chris? Maybe you're right. Maybe I do need to dump this. He literally just went, put his cloak down there. I should be doing this. You put fucking poor scopo on tilt.

What? Look, maybe he'll become a better producer because of this. So if you don't fire him, this is going to be a wake-up call to the show. I'm not firing Chris Gopo. But we will finish this conversation. I'm not one of them in the government conversations.

You might. All right. Liz, thank you so much. Let's make it look nice. Let me see, because Liz is a fucking professional. Liz, have you ever produced this podcast before? Go fuck yourself. Thank you.

Thank you. Lizzie, thanks, baby. Hi, I'll talk to you later. So basically, basically what you and everybody else says, well, I should get rid of Chris as the producer. Right? Yeah. Should I get rid of Deepo?

Well, she just have a talk with Deepo. Major warning. Major warning for. Major warning for. Right. There's a, there's a, there? Yeah, get rid of should I get rid of Deepo? Well, she just have a talk with deep major warning mate you were major warning for There's there's a there's a thing though like like I like you monk with power that these guys They give them a little bit of like there's a thing about them where it's almost the only power they have in life You're new on the show, right? Yeah, it's the first time I've how'd you get on the show? Oh, Chris? Contact me and you're back on and you wanted to get on how did you get on the show? Oh, Chris contacted me. And you're back on and you wanted to get on. How did you get on the show? Chris.

Oh, yeah. Chris had that was going to be a fight. They might be cut. I don't know. Tim, Tim, can you settle in the situation? You need probably to be back. Chris said to me, because he's going to be a fight about the structure of the show.

He said to me, goes, now, you've never been on the show. You know nothing about it. But what I'd like you to do is come in Lewis is gonna, you know try to get me fired and just try to you know So I don't know I think you should kind of be fired to now. I don't know Thank you, too, and I've only been here for a few minutes Can we have you know you saw me but I just feel like I got a fight for my own could you let him? Fight you yelling at him for not talking every time they talk you yeah Let him fucking have a word. I just said he should decide of Chris gets fired I was giving him power I

think I should have I should decide a lot of things about this show I think I should probably move into an executive role I know I do I I would use to some mortgages I know a lot about business so what's I feel right so what what would you would you take over Chris people would get a big warning to get a sit down. Yeah, he's drunk on his own power. That's he shouldn't be blocking people for the show That's not why you can't Well, if you look at here not in the chat room not in the chat room. It's not the chat room is what it is I know even a 24 hour block is still you can't block some really but we don't block people on the Twitter or the other thing. Right right? You know block people on the Twitter or the other thing right right you know block people on Twitter right now no on the yeah

what's up I was just like I asked them kind of a dumb question I guess what exactly um Miranda What exactly what are the duties of a podcast producer I just fucking don't know so I'll say like me that's Oh you want to tell you what I tell them. I want to know from Scopus point of view. What is your point of view on mine? Scopus, you give him your point of view and then I'll give him mine.

Okay. What do I do? I book the show. Yeah. I get everything in order. I get all the ads in order. Uh, I make sure that the ads in order. What does that mean? I pay for your coffee every time you come here.

Thank you for that. Well, I try. Okay. You have not get it. All right. Thank you for that. In order what does that mean? I pay for your coffee every time you come here You might get it We try to pay we give you that money back I get it Get everything in order I get the Everything in order twice. All right. Here's the other is what he does He doesn't even know what fucking job a stutter Let him fucking get called for Everything in order twice. All right, here's the deal. This is what he does. He doesn't even know what's fucking job. Look, he does a stutter. He doesn't know. Okay.

Let him fucking get his coffee. I'll tell you what he does. I'll tell you what he does. He's, he's, he, he books guests. He gets coffee. Do those get in order? Now, he fucking takes care of a lot of shit, man. First of all, every week, you know,

well, I used to do regulars on the show, like back in the day, but it know, I used to do regulars on the show, like, back in the day, but it got to the point where the regulars couldn't be on all the time, and it wasn't, I had to do the show when they could do it, instead of when I wanted to fucking do it, and I don't like doing that. And then I started having new people on all the time with a regular, or two, or whatever. But my rule is, if a regular wants to get on, you guys can get on. You know what I mean? If I mean if you like do I need to get the fuck on because I didn't know that that's usually my rule if you have to get on the show because you have something a blah blah blah yeah absolutely but I started switching it up because first of all I I really enjoy meeting new comics I love how many comics I've met from the show

that I would have never met. And then I go to a club, hey, what's up? You know what I mean? You, you, last week, I mean every week there's somebody new on the show, at least one person that I don't know, which I love. And it's just, it's easier for you guys.

There's less responsibility, because I felt like even, you guys were like, I can't make it and I don't want it to be a hassle for anybody. This is why you need somebody that's why that's all people for you But he what do you mean hassle? I don't want a hassle. You need to here's a thing I think I think you know too I think you need to sit down I do I do put on your headphones. I do you need to make people ask me don't walk the fuck out Okay, here's why I couldn't do that. Here's why I couldn't do that today's why I couldn't do that today ready why I'll because of you that's

up to the man I'm gonna tell you why why okay because I Walk in today you for hang on my headphones my headphones. Yeah my headphones. These are very expensive headphones. Yeah We're over there my head these headphones were here. This wire, these plugs, all these were turned in different directions. They weren't where I leave them, which is the rule of studio, leave it the way you left it. They were all twisted right left. This plug was in that slot, that plug was in that slot.

So when this microphone was plugged into this, it came through that microphone, and this one came through that fucking, so I had to sit there and go, why is this not working? And we took us around 20 minutes ago, we had to follow the court, hang on, had to follow the courts,

all the way back, had to have D-pool over here, and then Chris came back, and we finally, we finally, we finally, we finally, we finally figured it out, he was over the couch. I was scared. Right, for the first 10 minutes, I walked in there with a lot of and and and and Tim is good. I like him on this show. I do like him. I like her too. She's great. Well, I fucking murdered.

So here you understand? So because of you last night and the way you record here, where you're you didn't do what you're supposed to do. Can I? You fucked up my show. Can I? And you were late. No, I wasn't. Yeah, you were two minutes late. I was three minutes fucking early.

No, two minutes late. Three minutes early. What time do we start the show today, Deepo? Three o'clock. Oh, maybe you were. Sorry. The... The...

The wires and all that shit. Oh, okay, sure. I... No, I use the same studio setup as you. Yeah. If I did not turn back the volumes or I did not switch out that wire like I understand that that's what you did. That's what I did. That's not what light. I apologize. I apologize. So you fucked up but because of you if it took you 20 minutes to look at the light peek out and see that the channel was plugged into a different channel eyes at my fault you have a No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no fucking rule even like you found it and you don't yes, I do because you I don't

I'm not using it right after you you fucking monkeys. There's other podcasts between me and you so there's two other podcasts So that's right. You it's not me. Okay, when I come in. It's not your settings. It's whoever was fucking before me settings I don't know your fucking settings dude, so you didn't do that. No, I left it that way because whoever comes in They're all turned in different fucking direction. No, let's talk about the plug unplugged. That's what I'm talking about That plug being unplugged. I had that you I Is that you don't even think it was me? No, I said you are because I didn't unplug that I moved the microphone over I didn't change the channel right so that's not you you didn't unplug that no I personally did not unplug that who did I don't know I hear Maddie is not here so I can't speak for him

But I don't think he did because he moved the microphone from that mic He even moved my so he bent the microphone. I just rock my the only person that uses this show between you and me is Rob sprints and left button no, I thought they left button. No. I thought they did it. No. No. Since when? Because they use it Wednesday, Rob is Thursday. So it goes to other shows between us.

No, no, no. Rob does the same setup I do. Rob makes sure that the setup is my setup. That's the fucking, so we'll call Rob. And if Rob is like, yeah, dude, I did that. I'll call him. And if is like yeah, dude I did that I'll call him and if he's like dude Maddie might have unplugged it all that's it Maddie is my producer, right? He might have unplugged I can't just take the hit. Yeah, I don't know because I'm not gonna say it's me if you're saying dude All right, these are my settings blah blah blah. I'm like dude

There's two other shows in between when I do my show when you do your show. So that's crazy all right So it's not you. I know. I don't know. It's me. Okay. Typically we leave the fucking studio in the right position. And if you can't see that it's the channel one, it's a different microphone just by opening your eyes and looking at it. That's a problem. And your guys that you have two fucking guys here should be able to point that out to you fairly fucking easily. That's not a 20 minute problem. He was now getting coffee. And I don't do this anymore. He does it. Okay, but here's the thing is it's set up the

same every week. It's supposed to be the same thing. So if it's not you it's Rob. If it's Rob, I got a fucking talk to him. Somebody here's the thing. When I leave the fucking studio, if it's if it's not you, it's Rob, and someone's Why are you looking for a problem with me? Here's the problem. No, you ask me. He's the problem. I said you're the one. Chris Cumber is the problem with the show. Not me. You said he's the problem. You were the problem today. No, that's not true. Maybe.

Maybe. I'm not. Fine. Maybe. What's that? One hundred percent was me. I'm sorry. Is that the problem with the show? Really? I'm sorry about it. Fucking up the wire and putting the one wire on the other channel now the show can go on Now we can move on Listen to you're you're always a Why you gotta always be like why can't you just lighten up? I'm late Why can't why is why you always get fight with people I'm fighting with everything I hear you I'm volunteering

I'm telling you Bobby. Here's what I'm okay. Give me a month. I'm okay. Here's a deal Lewis for producer. Yeah I will find a predecessor for me. Okay, who will take the position? Did I use that word right? We're not gonna help predecessor No, but good enough for you. I think it's fine. Like I think you're Puerto Rican. That is predecessor is good. Are you not Puerto Rican? Fuck you, Tim. I'm just saying. I'm saying. I'm sorry. I think Chris has name. Tim. Don't back down for the I'm no, I'm I predecessor is a good word in general. Don't don't let it bully you out of it whether he uses this Fucking when he was fat. He wasn't as confident. I never knew when he was fat.

I've always known him as high protein. He was very, very, very, very, guy on Facebook when I go on, he's like, comics on the road. You don't have to eat like a pig. And then there's like an uploaded picture from Starbucks of like a hard boiled egg and he's like, this is what you can eat

when you're on the road. And then he'll do like a workout. And I respect and I think it's amazing. And I'm like, I wish I had that discipline. Get to know me, it's changed your life. I am away. I'm with you He's had the discipline for eight months of his life. That's not true. Let's not get carried away five years from now If he's still in shape. Yeah, I'm fucking It is all about how long you can make a guarantee he has an addict fucking personality

Okay, yeah, it's in him and as soon as something is something doesn't go his way he's gonna fill up on carbs yeah he's gonna be in Sundays what's a list of how to call so be back in a fucking long black jacket handed on flyers you do cheat days right yeah I do this more mrs. Bob I listen we've done with this are you good can I what what are you gonna produce the show for a month? No? Why because all right? What are you gonna do? Well? I'm gonna tell me what you're gonna do better You you you yelling at him. He doesn't know what the fuck he's doing. I first thing you gonna do

I am asking you the question I will I will produce a rev the YKWD. What do you fucking do? Okay number one? I will say Bob You don't have to worry about anything anymore. I will all this shit. It's over. I like it You fucking walk in, Bob. Listen to you. You walk in whatever you need. It's ready to fucking go. You walk out, dude.

You don't think you're done. I don't think. Okay. That's it. Then what I do is I make sure that every area of this podcast from the sound, video, marketing, social media, I mean, ever booking everything is constantly expanding. It's constantly growing in the right direction. It's not, we're not sitting down going,

we did it good enough guys, we did it. No, no, no, every area of the podcast is constantly getting better. Every single fucking aspect. It's constantly being thought about. I will definitely, I mean, I'll thank you guys, we're gonna fix the books, booking a little bit. It's gonna be, we're gonna fix it a little bit.

I'm not saying Casey, you might be back in, we gotta sit down. Okay. I know, but I mean, I feel like what we're doing. I think, what I think I say some sweetie listen Casey first of all yeah, you're doing you fucking awesome It's so sexy. Here's a thing. I brought you on a weird show I should have brought you on like a Dan corporate Dan show or a Joe Lichel I brought you in on but I think it's you doing fine don't pick a side so far. What do you think so far? I want to hurt her. Do you are you with so far. What do you think so far? I want to hurt her.

Are you with Scopo or do you think he should be fired? Well, I think of me. I don't think Scopo should. I like Scopo. Casey, get off. You just fucking have a backbone. I like Scopo too, but the fact that he booked me, he should be fired.

Like that's the way I feel. I don't have any late night credits. I have access TV. I shouldn't be in this chair. I shouldn't have any late night credits. I have access TV. I shouldn't be in this chair. I shouldn't be here. As a business, you know. I think that, I think, I think Lewis has a put, no, I'm getting it.

I think Lewis, are you too busy to do? And I'm just wondering if I can have that. I love 80s. Yeah, that's what he needs. Another podcast. That's not, it's too many podcasts. I put this all on my podcast. I know.

I know, but then I'm not getting successful. Let me explain to you something, okay? I'm not even, we don't know. I'm not sure if he needs another podcast. That's not, it's too many podcasts. I produce all of my podcasts. I know, I do a very good job, but I'm not gonna be successful. Let me explain to you something, okay? I'm not even gonna be able to. I'm not gonna be able to take a break. Can you speed it up? Yes. Well, let's do it after the break. Can I tell you what's wrong with the booking?

Yeah. Yeah, you've been booked on the show. No. Okay, here's what we would be here. You wanna know what I would do? Yeah, I'd be looking. Shut up, I gotta do another thing. What I'd take a break for?

Can I do the live reads? No, you can't. You can't do live reads anymore, Bob. I'll do them for you as a producer of the show. I have to go. The company's not gonna go who's that. They know. I know, I gotta do another thing, wanna take a break? Can I do the live reads? No, you can't. No, you can't. No, you can't. You can't do it. I have to do it. I don't, the company's not gonna go, who's that? They know. I know, I gotta do them.

I have to do them. Is that the Puerto Rican rattlesnake? I have to do them. I know. All right, ready? We're gonna take a break. Anybody in the chat room, we're gonna be coming back to you right out of the break.

So if you have any questions, don't say anything out of line that deep who might get offended by though. Oh God. So yeah, have any questions want to chime in on this please go ahead or if you want to just What's the name of your show again the real-est podcast the other one? We're leaving us gangster. Yeah, what is that? L.O. Anthony Kuhi.com tonight. We have Gavin McGinnis on the show guys

So anyways, we're gonna be back I love Gavin. We're gonna be back in a couple minutes so make sure you're hanging there if you're in the chat or if you're listening live it'll be two seconds we we're back with him to piss and I'm gonna blow my nose and we're gonna do some live reads and that's it all right and make sure you get your comedy salad t-shirt right here. If you're in the area, you go to the comedy seller in the next couple of weeks or a month or whatever.

Go to the Village Underground around the corner and they have a merch table Wednesday through Saturday, 20 bucks. It's fucking great t-shirt. Same company that does my t-shirts, does comedy seller. So make sure you grab one of those or grab the rubber can live with the Village Underground at riotcast.com.

We'll be back in two minutes. Baseball is in full swing. Get it? And you can be part of all the action, all season long at draftkings.com, the official daily fantasy partner of major league baseball. Daily fantasy means no season long commitments, just instant cash, instant gratification. That's what I like, instant gratification. Why wait until the end of the season to get paid? When you can win huge prizes every day,

just pick two pictures, eight position players, and you pick up your cash. That's it. Last year, Pete from Colorado won a million dollars in one day, simply playing fantasy baseball at DraftKings.com. So hurry to DraftKings.com now and use promo code Kelly to play for free in today's $10,000 fantasy baseball contest. DraftKings.com, official partner of Major League Baseball, enter Kelly for free entry now at DraftKings.com. That's DraftKings.com. That's DraftKings.com. Make sure you go and check out the Comedy Seller when you're coming alive and go around the corner of the Comedy Seller Village Underground and get yourself one of these awesome t-shirts, which I'm going to be fucking wearing this weekend at Bonnaroo going there tomorrow.

Actually Thursday to do some shows with apparently a bunch of guys that don't like me. And con Bolotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca. Espectacularismos, monumentos, rincones de película y un sincín de aventuras te esperan. ¡Fliparás! Huelades de madrida murcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros. Bolotea. Parifa sujetas a disponibilidad consulta las condiciones en Bolotea. Y si no, ¿qué es eso? ¿Qué es eso?

¿Qué es eso? ¿Qué es eso? Huela desde Madrid, a Murcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros. Volotea. Tarifa sujetas a disponibilidad, consulta las condiciones en volotea.com. I So we from I'm here we are it's funny, you know, it's funny. I mean we are moving on we get it We'll go to the chat room real quick, but we're moving on like I we know it's anytime Lewis is on We spend at least 20 to the first hour on whatever gripy has yeah with somebody I learned a lot about how not to be All right, blink fucking asshole you fucking scuoppos in the bathroom fucking punch it But I think I know I'm fucking KC. She's really really hot

How about she's a comedian she's getting there How about she's a comedian she is getting there I'm there Listen I would I would cheat on Beatrice with her right now on camera. I really would you're a Beatrice How's that going good? That's done anyway go sorry? We doing the chat room. Yeah, go to the chat room You're we're going to your chat first all right James pass. Don't be please don't I depo please don't be bullied and Pushed into some fucking Lewis, you feel bad corner. Be you, stand up for yourself.

Remember this podcast. Well, apparently if I do, I'm gonna be yelled at by Lewis. Yeah, but who cares, you can be yelled at. Choose your words wisely. Be yelled at. I just did. Being yelled at by Lewis is okay. If you're not being kicked out of the business.

It's a new feeling to me, so I'm not used to it. All right, there's five go mites. I fucking follow his Instagram. That's not your go mites. Go fucking tweet that right now at Bobby Kelly. Let him know what the fuck is up. Lewis is talking voices, Yellen. You, Lewis.

Lewis uses fans like a superhero power. Like Siri, go find me where there's a coffee shop go might go Hey go might go Then I post about an iPhone. I was like I want to get an iPhone I had like five go might send me up like dude. I will give you an iPhone. Yeah, did they give you one? I'm gonna buy one I don't like to be in the bed of the go might see them face to face. Yeah, five go might James Pasquise as best fake fighting since WWE. I think it was pretty real.

No, this is real. This is legit real. Yeah, this is real. Go ahead. Joss says, today's show is like the first part of Festivus, the airing of grievances. That's a good name. Mm.

That's a. Mookie Phillips says, Scopo is going to find himself in the pill bottle later tonight. Oh, that's a deep, that's a chat. Yeah. That's fucking deep, oh god. Mookie Phillips says Scopo is going to find himself in a pill bottle later tonight That's a deep shit. Yeah, that's fucking deep. Oh god. What else is this is the did oh we lost what's the guy's name that we lost? Fuck you TV. Fuck you TV. He's hanging from a rope in his closet Haven't seen him in chat. He's fucking he's getting a fucking tattoo of Legion just gang so there's fucking arm right now Look what I did. Okay. Black Gospel says total number of words spoken by the guests combined 27.

Yeah. Give or take 10. Give or take 10. I just needed to be said. I'm sorry to take over the podcast, but guys, I feel like this was important. Just Leslie says, I think more people get smashed way more on YKWD than on LOS.

Yes, agreed. They are different animals. I love them both. To smashing podcasts. That's what we do on this show. Yeah. smashed way more on yk2bd than on los agreed they are different animals i love them both to smashing podcast that's what we do on the show that shut up tim i didn't say anything i'm sorry to smash i deserve it i deserve everything i'm getting today what do you

got what do you got uh... she also asks is luis going to be a bonero no he's not you gotta be funny come on bopmin come on bop i want to go to my funny bro Boneroon? No, he's not, you gotta be funny. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha crazy fucking festival. Tennessee. Tennessee, my Thursday. I'm excited. Fucking wait. Are you doing stand-up or are you just doing that? I'm doing both. I'm doing both. Stand up on Thursday and one of the... Not the TV show he's having sex and doing drugs. And then I wish. I wish I could do fucking drugs. If you could do one drug... Pot. Bear one. Really? Oh yeah. If you were gonna go back at one time, that would be it. If I could do any drop knowing that you wouldn't get addicted

I'm saying let's see you could just go with the journey. No, but if I could I want to do it if I could do it I would do it. I would like to smoke weed. Yeah, you understand. I'm going I don't even with all my look I know I have mental illness. Yeah, I also have the illness from From you know being you know with the way I was brought up I have all kinds of fucked up shit that I've been trying to deal with in therapy or whatever, AA and all that.

But I know a lot of guys get to take these pills and kind of level them out. I don't take anything, I know, nothing, I kind of envy that. I'm choosing not to take the fucking the The fucking you know the anxiety shit all that shit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So if there was a thing I could take and I would definitely be weed I could sweet always looks come I'm sober five years weed never doesn't look good Like after a while cocaine and stuff you start to go Well, I remember just weed when I smoked weed

I would just fucking hang on what's good. Yeah, yeah, some fucking right elios pizza, right? You know what I mean? Yeah now and I see guy now that weed is evolved when I smoked weed It was the plant you were also 13 when you smoked weeds and that's kind of what every 13 year old kid was doing Well, I was hanging out with 30 year olds I was I was hanging out with 30 year olds watching pop I too, you know what I mean? It's you know But you know and the weed I smoked back then was you know you're gonna smoke a fucking lot of it You could do it now you could take a couple hits and you get you get different highs Yeah, it's so fucking weird and from strands, you know

You see and you want to you want to do it. I don't want to do it. I don't see weed and go I want to do it like a pizza like we Now if I see a fucking pie. Yeah, if I see somebody fucking flopping down a Sunday, right right? It's a little kid walking by on a hot day with a cone. That's for me. I'm like, oh, the fuck you're good, duh. You know what I mean? But weed, any drug, I don't see that alcohol either.

I don't see that. Alcohol is too violent. I get to my, when I drink, I just got violent. I want, I did so much bad shit when I was drinking. I would never want to put alcohol in my body ever, ever ever ever because I don't know what the fuck would happen Is Bonnery like everywhere you go is just shrooms and drugs and I don't I did Bonnery when it was in Jersey, right? Wasn't it in Jersey once? It was wasn't it? I was at always in Tennessee. I don't know

I know Okay, there was a festival in Jersey once I never did Bonnery then there was a big one in Jersey I remember me and Peacorelli did it and you know there was a lot of fucking drugs Party more drinking. It's a more of a drink. Yeah, yeah, I drugs, you know, I mean happens But it's not like you know it's like I South West is probably the huge drug That's a drinking thing too. That's drinking too. Yeah, because it's sponsored. It's very yeah Okay, yeah, this isn't fucking woodstock. This is a sponsored event They attack things and you know bud wiser and who of course

Is there things in Manhattan when like date like 12 kids go to the ER from the music festivals? Yeah, governor's Island or whatever With the festival just my phone can my phone The festival I just left yeah people just yeah, that's go and do it. Yeah, that's what they're doing in the fucking Molly and 100 degrees. Yeah, blow and just falling. Yeah, I could tell all that happens to Burning Man is where I think they do. Burning Man is a bad, that's amazing. That's just for drugs.

Yeah, that's great. Yeah, it's 49 kids on Flaka. Have you heard of Flaka? Yeah, it's like a new drug light vessels. It's crack mixed with Molly, PCP and meth. It doesn't even sound good. Okay, 40, I just left that festival in Austin. 49 kids, oh, did from a flock of.

If you read about these drugs, their tent, like the stories of terrifying, when bad swelts came out, there was like a story in the newspaper in Florida where there was a woman, the cops pulled up, there was a woman just choking a pit bull. And that's how they found, and that's just the most terrifying cover of,, it's like 10 years later. I'm fine

Dude that fucking hall. Yeah, it's like that's the way those drugs lead you like that That I don't know like I don't want people to abuse animals, but that's just funny to say Let's have a woman jogging a pillow. Yeah on her front stat But they split up somebody fucking put a belt around their dogs like nose and they like really it was so so sad but it was also just kind of hilarious like our tuners like a tongue was sticking out right. Yeah, but they took the belt off. Yeah, and the dog's fucking it dug into its skin.

That's fucking that's not even there's not one second of that that's for the animal abuse is that fucking kill me. Yeah, I mean when they belt was on maybe you laugh when you take the belt off. There's little fucking tongues sticking out. That's kind of funny dude. That. I mean, when they belt was on, maybe you laugh, but when you take the belt off. There's little fucking tongues sticking out. That's kind of funny, dude. That's not funny, dude. But don't you think people get more upset about animal abuse than people?

Don't you think people got a lot more upset when a dog is abused? No, not me. I get mad like only people are abused. Did I see kids get abused? Oh, God. I'm fucking fear. I don't know.

I think number one thing, when I see, even the two moms that just fought in Walmart, I was so fucking mad at that one mom because your kid is right there. No, no, no, no, the kid, she said, no, the kid said help me. Oh, like that in the fight. She said that to the goodness. It was weird to take team. Look, here's the first, because I saw the clip of the kid just hitting over the shampoo bottle. And I was like, sick to my stomach. You're telling fucking James, that's what you do.

But you backed out of your up. You know you shampoo, you use offense. What if you better be getting at the video? You're doing the home goods. If you wasn't being made of video, the other woman really did go and attack that chick. So it's like in a weird way, it looked like it's obviously a fucking shitty situation.

But the kid was defending his mom who was attacked. I know, I know I got it, but it sucks. It just sucks. Take the hit. Yeah. You can be, just take the hit and go home. Well, she knows she was on top. She was ground and pounded in the other check, dude.

She was wearing the fight. Yeah, but you don't do that in front of you, fucking. Take the hit. Do you know what happened? I was with my wife. That's like one of my, my, my chick. I was at one of these comic fucking things years ago. And the guy said some fucked up shit to me and I said okay

I'll be right back. I want a cab honey. I need to take you home Right, I took her home. I said I'm gonna I gotta go take care of something And I went back and I grabbed them. I said okay now let's go Right, and he's like what do I go? I'm gonna fucking I'm gonna fucking crack you over there Which shit outside and it was like okay. I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. But it's like, I would never fight the guy in front of my wife, because here's the thing, you never, even though you could be tougher, stronger, you never fucking know.

I was watching a fight on Facebook today, two guys in a car. One guy literally punched the other, literally leaned out of his car and punched the other guy's door. Just fuck you and punched it. The other guy, then he blocked him. This guy gets out of his car and punched the other guy's door. Just fuck you and punched it. The other guy, then he blocked him. This guy gets out of his car.

They both meet at the bumper. He punches him. The guy falls and two seconds away from a truck running over his head. No. The truck was coming and that's murder. You fucking done. Yeah.

You done whatever the fuck that was, whatever he cut you off for. He called you an asshole and told you to go fucking mother, he's dead, you're in fucking jail for life. That's murder. You know what I mean? It's like, I get it because I have road rage, I have regular rage, I have fucking walking down the street rage.

I get it, but it's fucking definitely not worth it. Imagine that, and then do it in front of a kid. Anything with a kid I'm, you're an ass. I was at my sister's, that's, or a baby shower, and my son was playing with a bunch of other little kids, and you know, we practice peaceful parenting. We don't spank, my son's never even had his hand spank. Like, we're really busy.

You teach him how to pickpocket. Yeah. You gotta use a knife. A butterfly knife. You teach him how to choke another kid out. So, James taps. So this one, James grabs his, there's like four little kids who are all part of like one family there.

James grabs the one little girl's ball and just goes to throw the ball. Like he's just throwing the ball. So this is like, she's maybe one and a half. Her little brother who's about six months older than James. He's three. He comes over to James and grabs him by his arm. Yeah. Like he gives him a goon arm. And he's like, don than James, he's three. He comes over to James and grabs him by his arm, gives him a gun arm, and he's like, don't throw my sister's ball, and he's like,

angrily at him and James looks down to his arm. He's never had aggression like that. Never had any aggression like that. Oh, of course, look in life, you have to worry about that. You'll snap on B someday. No, that's not what I was saying. He's seen us fight, but he's never experienced that. And you yell at Scopo.

It fucked me up because I'm going holy shit dude. I have to figure out a way to make my son prepared for that without instilling violence in him. With fear. It's actually fear. It's crazy. It violates his fear. When you're being violent, it's because you're afraid.

Anger is fear. That's all it is. That guy was afraid. That guy scared him. That's why he punched his car. That guy got scared. And then that's why it is. That guy was afraid, that guy scared him. That's why he punched his car. That guy got scared, that guy, and then that's why they met. In reality, it's just fear. You're just afraid that someone's going to do something, is doing something to you that

they shouldn't. Afraid of being taken advantage of. But the thing that you're teaching your kid though, the guy grabbed him and he didn't react. That's amazing. He didn't didn't react. That's amazing. He didn't react with fear. That's the worst thing you can give a kid is fear. And what you do by hitting him, I think,

I'm not a child expert before a bunch of assholes tweet me, I think what you're doing when you scream at them, don't fucking, don't do that. You're scaring them, right? And you're teaching them how to be afraid well more than anything else I think that's a fact on studies on this what you're doing is you're teaching them when you want something somebody to study us and you do some studies and they what you're doing when you're hitting your kid and you're yelling at your kid you would

also say there was studies done there was study. I don't think it's day. Whatever. It's just one person, maybe with an assistant to some dude, some dude did this. That girl you were at 2015, no offense, but you're teaching them when they want something, you use aggression to get it. Okay. And that's like, and that's that a bad, is that always a bad thing? Cause in life, sometimes you have to be aggressive to get what you want. I think there's other choices.

I worked at Child Development Center for, it worked for like 10 years, just on and off with different types of kids. But we worked at Child Development Center. We weren't even allowed to tell them, no, don't do that. We had to, like they had to think, even if they were arguing we'd be like, I see that you want Tyler's ball. What is a way instead of, like, seeing something,

or like I see that you're jumping on the couch, is there a better place to jump? I think it's kind of like a fun way to talk but it was, they had to do it themselves. I think, but there is, we're evolving as people. We're learning so much as people that, and what is growing gills. That we, we, I think that it's good.

I think you should, you know, talk to your kids like that. If there's another, give them, instead of saying, don't do that, hey, what about this ball? 10 out of 10 times, it's manipulation. I have my own issues with patients, but it's like, my kid will be doing whatever, like jumping on the couch and you don't want him to, because he's gonna fall down and break his head.

Every time, like you say, no, don't do it, he wants. And it's your bed. It's all so much better. He wants to, he wants to almost like, they're at that age, he's two and a half, he wants to be spiteful. But every time I get frustrated with him,

it never works. And every time I try to distract him with something else or I say, hey, let's start doing ABCs or just kind of like put his mind somewhere else, it works. And it really is just about, it's laziness. The reason people yell and the reason people hit their kids is because they're lazy and it's easier.

It does work. People say that all the time. They go, don't. They go, they go again until your kid goes to run in the street, you got to give him a smack on the ass to let him know that they can't do that. Well, no, I mean, that's a lazy way of doing it. You're not supposed to be violent toward this child because you're afraid of them getting hurt.

Well, I also think too, I don't, it could be, it is laziness, I believe, but it's also just don't know my parent my my mom Yeah, they're they didn't know they didn't read they don't fucking know teach me look a hundred years ago You know most babies didn't make it cuz there's fucking cold I'm saying a hundred years ago most babies made it no dude Disease and when they're polio. I mean a lot of they didn't know what when kids just got sick I'm speaking literally. Yeah, but no they did a lot of you did make humans didn't make it the fucking you know We lived until our life is that 15 hours 10 years exactly because we know more that's my point so absolutely

But here we know way more how to raise a human being now Psychologically, right you know physically. Did you watch the fed up documentary? Yeah But here we know way more how to raise a human being now psychologically. Right. You know, physically. Did you watch the FedUp documentary? Yeah. Yeah. My kid does not eat, my wife, my kid eats food, not jarred food, very little, those little spicy things.

Yeah. But she cooks breakfast for him, protein, vegetable, fruit, lunch, dinner, he to real fucking food, every meal. And once in a while, he'll have a package, but it's actually organic, whatever the fuck, whatever, how good she can get it. But yeah, we know soda, no juice. But see, I think that there's some problems in that too, because I mean, that's not how did any of you guys

grow up on organic food. No, we grow up on McDonald's Taco Bell. No, my grandma was like smoking cigarettes in a car, and like, I feel, I mean, we're not like fine fine, but like we're all, no, we have no one to eat. No, we have no one to eat. No one to eat. It's just the worst generation. But we started that was showing that it's processed foods and all this bullshit.

Yeah. Yeah. Or a bunch of more, buddy. Why do you think cancer is out of control? Why do you think autism rates are out of control? This is everything we're putting into our body. I think too. And it's this generation won't get fucked up for us. Okay.. 50 years ago there wasn't processed foods. That was the thing. I grew up on crap singles and look at you. I might have cancered 20 years. I may have

cancered right now. I probably have cancered right now. I know you know. I swear, I swear he's there is there we're finding out now. Yeah. That the the pyramid of the food chart was fucked up. We're finding out now that the stuff, the the glue close, the fucking show. The service of bread a day was no good. You don't need to. You don't need to. You don't need to. You don't need to.

You don't need to. You don't need to. You don't need to. You don't need to. You don't need to. You don't need to. You don't need to. You don't need to. You don't need to. You don't need to. You don't need to. You don't need to. The theory was the one that said, yeah, eggs were bad. But also at the same time, I think that the more you shelter your kids from certain things

like the more we put antibacterial stuff, all that's if the minute they come into contact with germs, they're gonna be like, they're gonna get sick. They're gonna get sick. We need to educate other parents. That's what we need to do. Stop, stop, stop, stop. All right, stop talking over each other. All right.

It's all right. No, you're talking and he's shopping over you, but I agree with him, and I don't agree with you. So, I just don't know. I just don't know. I want to make sure that he gets a chance to fucking yell at you. But I agree with him. I don't agree with you Listen I want to make sure that he gets a chance to fucking yell at you Listen here I I believe look at all the fucking I thank God my kid doesn't have a nut allergy Right because where did those fucking come from what the fuck is that?

What's sensitive now? Yeah, they are so sensitive? I think the scary thing is the autism. Because the autism is now unprecedented levels. Yeah. And people don't know why. They go, why? Some people playing vaccines, some people playing, but I think a lot of it is, I don't think we as a country want to admit that we've been poisoning our citizens.

Poisoning our citizens for the last 40 years. When in the 1970s, they said, a bagel is better for you in the morning than eggs that screwed everything I also but also fucking juice I remember I was at this house my kid doesn't drink juice and if he has juice it's watered down Okay, and even that's terrible. It's fucking terrible. Apple juice is not fucking apple juice No, it's okay. I start kid We know the things you work out with the you put your water in yeah, he had one of those full of fucking apple juice

Yeah, and it's like this kids running around grabbing shit being a fucking knowing and my kids just sitting there playing and I'm like He's got a fucking he's loaded up with this poison People and people have an instinct because they do with my kid all the time You know I bring him to the daycare at my gym and they the instinct of feed kids constantly to shut him up or to do it here Take some potatoeships. I was like are you fucking are you giving my son Doritos? He's fucking too Oh, I saw there's any Doritos you fucking fucking idiot. The laziness to just turn on a TV show. Yeah, right. I've done it. I've done it I was so much easier, but here's a so hard to do so hard. I know Here's a thing. I'm a fucking TV. We got to get some shit done. Here's the thing you can put on fucking music

We try to put on the music channel and then he'll he'll go from place to place to place and listen to the fucking tunes and how much of the ADHD And hyperactivity and anxiety and depression, all these drugs we need to be medicated for? How many of those things in? I thought you were talking about scuppos act. Wow. How many of those are just in balance of your diet? You know, because if you eat,

shit like that every day, you're gonna be depressed. I'm gonna go look, you're overweight. I'm overweight. I'm horribly, right? Yeah. You used to be overweight. Who may?

Yeah. And it's, I was on my, I was taking a little break. horribly, right? Yeah. You used to be overweight. Who may? Yeah. And it's, I was on my, I was taking a little break. But it's, you look back, like I literally woke up this morning and I'm like, I can't, I know what it is. It's the fucking addiction of sugar. That's what it is. It's the addiction of when you're a baby.

Yeah. And it's, I can, all of a sudden. You used to have a crave like a steak, even though you like it, like I love steak. Have you ever really craved? I do crave a steak. See, you're really cra- Like, here's what I crave. Yeah, what happens is-

You associate with stuck-in-dick from elementary school, so I crave, I crave, I crave a pizza, I crave pasta, I'll crave a meal, like a certain meal. Okay. And I, the food, especially now that I'm not fucking being a sexual deviant, you know, it's hard for me because back in the day, when I used to do comedy and try to bang chicks, my body was part of the fucking thing. I needed to be in some sort of shape to get the chicks.

Right. I wanted now, it's almost like keeping me away from chicks because I'm this, so I don't have the opportunity to get them. So it's almost doing something good, being this fucking atrocious physically while I'm eating. So it helps me in some weird way. Because I'm scared. I'm scared of getting in shape again,

and then the fucking shit's gonna come back. I fuck everything. And I'm afraid to say, am I gonna ruin my life? But you know this Bobby, women, in shape again and then the the fucking shit's gonna come back fuck every and I'm afraid to say I'm I'm gonna ruin my life but you know this Bobby you women I know that women don't give a fuck dude women women so really don't you know you got a lot of fuck yeah you said you're not look at this said you were in a different place right I mean you said like that's not what you're about anymore right well I try I mean it's easier not having women look me we do comedy shows yeah it's funny because I see this with Lewis now what are

you doing? I see this with Lewis now is like a lot of chicks when we went to the we did gig in Rhode Island and we showed up at this gig at this wings place and all the chicks wanted Lewis. And it was- Oh, for them he is so attractive. But no, it wasn't ever seen me, they just- Yeah, wait a minute. No, believe me, if it was because of the act, they wouldn't win for me. But we're there and they would,

I mean, they would just like, who the fuck is that? You know what I mean? Like, like, but it was like, shit, I used to get that. I used to, but it almost made me go, oh, thank God, I don't have to deal with that. Because if I had to deal with a bunch of fucking four and a half's, you know what I mean? Fucking want to suck my dick with nothing to it.

Yeah. It's hard to fucking say no to that. Oh, I'm sure. It's really hard. And I mean, I admire you for not. We left. Wink Wink Nudge Nudge. No, we left.

Do you fucking idiot? We left. It is. nudge nudge. No, we left. Do you fucking idiot? We left. It is. But you can't do it. I can't. I feel like I'm fucking a puppet of this fucking shit food because it gets me all baggage ships will fucking send me down a spiral.

Well, it's a mental thing. I mean, dyes are all mental. My kids, my kids, my dad is. But that also comes from, I'll tell you right now now because our parents didn't know you said it before yeah It comes from an addiction from we I'm talking about when I was four years old I could just walk in my cupboard grab some fucking ho hoes grabs potato chips She really nothing even Cheerios it terrible. It's terrible all this shit is terrible for you And what happens is by the time we do realize is if you look in everyone's pantries

You look in everyone's plates. It's 70 80% carbs in sugars. Yeah process foods And you don't even realize it's but all of a sudden you're 30 and you look in everyone's pantries, you look in everyone's plates, it's 70, 80% carbs in sugars, process foods, and you don't even realize it. But all of a sudden you're 30 and you're going like, holy shit dude, I got all these fucking problems, and I need sugar. I need carbohydrates, I need pizza, I need pasta, I need it. The diet shouldn't be hard if you were eating the right way all of your whole life.

And that's what we're trying to do. It has to do with money to an extent too, because that's bullshit. That's a more trying to do. I think it has to a money to an extent too. That's bullshit. That is a whole thing. Oh, no, I do. It's so much harder to eat healthy with money. Far too much harder. Okay, all right.

Number one. What money? No, if you have no money, it's easier to get dollar slice. No, he is. No, he is absolutely right. Yeah, I agree. I said to my wife this, Lewis, it was Sunday. I go, look, I can't do it anymore.

I know I've been back and forth for the last couple of years, but I really gotta stop this. And it's gonna cost money. Because when I'm on comedy, thank God. When I'm on the road, when I'm on the road, look at, you're in a hotel. It's easier to get a pizza delivered cheaper if I'm going to go and get a steak. This hotel has to be better because I have to have 24-hour room service.

Right. So it does cost more money. It has a economic, you're right. It's harder when you're on the road as a comedian. Our lifestyle in particular and that's why I posted that thing on Facebook. Where it was just 10 quick little things so you could do a no sugar, no carbs. Eight-year-old Jizz, was that on there? A lot of coming to my own mouth. We're getting another that thing on Facebook, where it was just 10 quick little things so you could do a no sugar no car. Eight-year-old Jizz, was that on there? A lot of coming to my own mouth. We're getting another guy to come in your mouth. Depends on your options.

But it is harder for us to put 99.9% of Americans are not comedians on the road. So let's just take that, take aside the comedian lifestyle. We don't care about them. It's still hard to eat properly though, even if you have a full-time job. My brother works from 9 to 9 at night. What do you want to do to the salad to get his't just go eat? They're placed like New York City, you have no excuse because there's fucking healthy or what about my house job every corner? Is that a place? Yeah. Or is that a food? Sounds delicious. I understand what you're saying, but

you're right. The salad is salad. There have been 14,000. There have been studies done on both ends, okay? And it is nearly a measurable. Did they do the studies? They did them the Jews again. They do studies on both ends and it is nearly a measurable. If you go throughout the year, just eating healthy or eating shit, if you are doing it the right way, you have to be a little bit more creative because there's obviously less healthy options.

But you can do it. You have a great lesson. Here's the thing. What do you care about fucking the year? 20 years to your life? Here's the thing. Okay, right now, I wanted to go to good food, okay? Today, I came down thing. What do you care about fucking your 20 year serial life? Here's a thing though, okay right now, I wanted to go to good good food, okay.

Today I came down here, I was starving, I had to eat lunch before the show where I was gonna get sick. Cause I get a headache because my blood sugar will fucking drop and I'll get a headache, just sitting here for two hours. So it's like, okay, I could go to bands and get a quick slice, I'm done. I'll go to my moons and get a fucking shwam, I'm fucking done, it's quick, it's easier, okay, I could go to Benz and get a quick slice. I'm done. I'll go to my moons and get a fucking shwam,

I'm fucking done. It's quick, it's easier, six bucks. And then it's like, okay, let me go get a papaya salad over here with chicken. I know there's sugar on it, the sauce, but it's like, okay, where is, yeah, it's a huge difference. It's a huge difference, but it's still, it's like, okay, here. Let me go over here, do this, and and it was I had to go through the process

My brain had to fight the whole way to get to the point where it's like just go fuck because as Americans were Addicted to sugar and they make it look like we're lazy But but eating in New York you say it's easier. There's no excuse. It's actually harder for me Because it's so many fucking, when I got money, when I realized, I told you this, I had that fucking thing, I'm walking on the street one day over a nightdav and there's 10 pizza shops on my nightdav, and I was like, oh my God,

I can afford to go to every single one of them. There was a time where I could only eat, I would eat in the morning, right? Some type of egg sandwich, and then I could come on a trip. There was a time where I could only eat, I would eat in the morning, right? Some type of egg sandwich. And then I could come to the cellar and you got paid in food, so I would eat here. This would be my meals. That's it, because I couldn't afford anything else.

Then cut to years later. You get money. I can buy any, and I went to all fucking 10 pizza places. In one afternoon. No, in one afternoon. I was kidding, that's sad. I did. I got a slice every single one.

Am I addictive, fucking, whole that needed to be filled? Now I have unlimited resources. And the food for poor people is always funner. It's looks funner if you go to Western beef. Like the mascot is a cactus. Western beef is always in the worst, like the worst areas, like high crime, like we're still old New York. they still sketch chalk outlines of body and you go to Western

beef. And it's just a font and it got the cack, you know, it's just, whole foods is not a fucking place. We're not fucking children and we're not monkeys. Where cartoon characters should be attracting us into places, you should have a little bit more. Yeah, but it's when you're and a kid I think it is. That's the point.

This is exactly the point of that, Dr. that's what I got. My kid loves squash. I fucking love that. Right. Here's the thing, we have dinner that fucking 5, 5, 30 every night. Right.

Every fucking night and we sit down at the table. Yeah. There's no phones. There's no music on. no TVs, there's music. We'll have the music channel on. And we sit there. But it's like, I feel like, what are we doing at this? I was like, this is good.

This is my kids learning to sit at the dinner table and be social with his family and have some music playing in the background. And the food reading is all natural food that my wife made that's from, you know, it's not shit, anything shit. It's not take out. Because I didn't grow up, I grew up with the takeout from Little League or whatever we do.

My mother used to make a takeout. That's how I grew up. My mother used to make rice all the time. You know why? Because when she divorced my second dad and we moved in to just me, her, and my sister, and like a two-bedroom apartment, and we lived in the ghetto phase of my life,

she would make, oh, God, I'm addicted to it, and I haven't had it in around fucking 20 years, but it's the worst thing in the world. Creama tuna. What is that? It's tuna fish. Just with, with a gunk.

Cream of mushroom soup. Oh boy. You mix it with peas, and you pour it over white rice. Oh. And it's like some type of gunk. Cream of mushroom soup. Oh boy. You mix it with peas and you pour it over white rice. And it's like some type of gula. It sounds like something, but it's, it sounds like something like Mitt Romney would tell poor people to eat. It was poor people from the back of it.

My version of that was the can corn beef, like the shitty can corn beef that like mashes the part, white rice and sauce. That's good. And just like a bowl that just mix it, white rice corn. That's great. It was the best. I and it sounds good. And just like a bowl that just makes it white rice claw. It sounds great. It was, I'm on there right now.

I think it's getting cream and tuna and fuck it, some ghetto corn. But it's like, you know, terrible eating as a kid, three times a week, you just fucking white, minute rice, which is even like, what the fuck rice is that? It's horrible. Just minute rice. How can you cook rice in a minute? Yeah. What's that? I had sit down meals. My mom thinks this is holy man. I had I had my mom in my podcast. It's not it's it changes We have to get evolved through it the full spectrum of human emotion Yeah, I like it has been in this room. We're back on diet to try to start this like an hour ago. But I will tell you, I will

say that there is a show and here's the thing. I will say both of the revered, both of the names she named were characters from Sex in the City. No Joanne's not. That's my my my aunt's girlfriend. Yeah, that's like a sweater of ass name. But I will say from working because I worked at that weightless clinic, that's like a sweater vest name. But I will say from working because I worked at that weight last clinic. So I learned a lot about food. There are a lot of vegetables.

And there are a lot of things that you may be eating that do break down into sugar that you don't know. But I will say also, you can change your habits. It takes 21 days to create a habit. So if you, honestly, if you stopped, if you cut out sugar for 21 days, you could reset your metabolism. But it's hard because the first 21 days is you could reset your metabolism, but it's hard

because the first 21 days is the exact day as I watched Tranny Pull. And I've been addicted ever since. That's a year, that didn't know. But I thought it was two years to become human. To become human. To become human. To become what's that word, human nature, like reprogrammed.

To rebe, it's that those two years for something to become a second nature. 21 days. Is it out of your body in 21 days? It could be all that kind of stuff. So but once the sugar's out of your body, you're not. Could you have more confidence? Like, let's probably why they have that. Spread what I have like 28k programs.

Can you use they, they say? The studies that they did said that, no, but if one of once it is out of your system though it no longer here's a thing No, not going back just to go back a little further with the kid thing You know, I love I love look man. I know you mean you're a kind of the same spot. I I I Slippers I love my kid man. I can't express the love I have for that motherfucker. But there is, I know there's gonna be a point where, where you have to put these limits on him for his own good.

And like I said to him, he hit the dog, you know, he doesn't know that the dog, you know, he thinks it's my toy. So he pushed down on Diva, real kind of fucking, and I was like, no! And like that. And he looked at me and almost like scared. Yeah.

And I felt like shit. I knew I fucked up. I was just scared. I got scared for the dog. Shut it, I hit him. I got fucking petrified for the dog. I thought he was gonna really hurt my dog. Yeah. And it just was a reaction to that.

Like, you know, don't hurt my fucking dog. And I, he looked at me like, what the fuck was that? And that's when I realized that tone, as well as fucking physical is just as important. Yeah. You know, because it's not there's nothing he does. It's personal. There's nothing the kid does is to fuck with you. No, it just doesn't know any better. And it's hard to not, you know, to take a breath because my wife, I was like, shot the fuck up. You can't really do that. Even though my kids first word, I think

it's going to be shit. Because it's all these fucking, I'm always like shit. Every time something happens, shit. So the other day he goes, shit. I was like, fuck me. He's starting school, my fucking shit kid. But I, well, go ahead, what do you say? I was gonna say just sometimes then.

Should you use me a fucking, do you have nothing to say? You're just trying to stop me. No, no, no, no, no. I was saying sometimes you know, you read these things that they produce when you use that kind of tone with the kid. So if you use a tone with the kid and the dog, then the kid could then associate the dog as not fun, mean,

and then they might be afraid of dogs their whole life. You know, like in the words shit like that, that it's all connected. Like I know that back in the day, you know, hey, just let the kid fucking grow up. Right. But there is that too, where you kind of want to let the kid be a fucking kid You know, I'm a pussy though my wife is more he's fine

I'm always you know he'll climb up on his chair into her on the couch And I'm and she's sitting there with a phone in one hand going and I'm like Well, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, and she's like he's fine she's like, he's fine. It's like, he's fine until he's not. And then you're a fucker. You ever watch like, like, probably, and you probably know this with like your mom, or like my aunt, who's like in her 70s, we'll leave them, you know, we'll leave James, and we won't even leave him anymore

because O people are fucking retarded. So, we're like, oh, we're gonna go to the store and he'll just be going like into the kitchen through cabinets and shit. I'm like, and we're, you gotta, I mean, you gotta watch him. You can't just go into the cabinets, the place, the place, the place. Because the place you, back when you were a kid,

you did. They didn't give a fuck to them. We just fucking, this is why I've scars all over my body and I fucking have anger problems that I have addiction to food and stretch marks on my body because they didn't fucking care. They, people need just,

I'm coming out now, they need to start fucking caring. Ah, you got stretch marks too. I'm right. I'm the stretch marks and a fucking 48-inch waist you fat fuck Boy, I was just mean I think baby boomers were just not great parents, you know It was a good parents a very big point and I can't tell the fucking this documentary enough But it's a very big part of it was used in word tout tout a very big part of it was My predecessor I was used to word out. A very big part of it was my predecessor.

I tell you, it's a predecessor. Was these companies that were giving money to the government and lobbying the government, just like the cigarette company did, and you start to realize now exactly how much of it was, they break down the Michelle Obama thing, where she's, she had a genuine, she really wanted to start a movement where we were going to get kids fucking eating healthy and moving.

And then every company company every big sugar company Was like no, yeah, we would love to be involved and they got their money in it They got their books in it dude every school. There's a pizza Hut and almost every school in this country There's Pepsi machines. There's kids crazy to me that you're giving kids the option to pump this poison into their body My mother used to make me a lunch every day. Peanut butter and jelly. Oh, two of them. Literally, it was just pure sugar. It was white bread with peanut butter,

skipping peanut butter. With fucking some jelly. What the fuck jelly doesn't have the actual defrute, and it's just jelly. It's a fucking like pig-large. Where the fuck it is to make, it's crazy. And then an apple. Oh, fucking great.

My high school. They say go to a supermarket and everything on the edges. And nothing in the middle. Yeah. Everything on the edges is good. My high school, we had the worst food. We had french fries, burgers, hot dogs. Then we had like sandwiches,

but they were all fucking processed sandwiches. Nothing was healthy. And it was the worst. When my kid goes to school, he's getting a fucking lunch. You know what I mean? And every once in a while, I'm going to have to let him buy the pizza and food. You know what I mean? But I'm hoping that, you know, I'm hoping that he'll be grossed out by, I think about this,

when you do no sugar in our grains, right? When you just put a little bit of sugar in your coffee. You remember like, God, dude, this is really fucking sweet. Like holy shit, you lose the flavor for exactly. My wife's coffee's like fucking kids. It's crazy, it's crazy. It's so good. Yeah, it's so good.

I would fucking kill for just one sip of it. It makes me feel good when I eat it. Let me tell you something, when I went back to Boston with this fucking loser in Stavros, we ate, I mean, we went to the North End and we went to fucking La Famille of George Eos who I used to wait till. I was playing.

And we went to Bova's bakery. We went to Bova's bakery. We walked out with fucking two tins and sat on a fucking mailbox with milk and just ate canollis. And I didn't eat anything. You guys bullied me into eating food. Oh, my.

I was so full. So good. It's how you guys my mom was thought She could retire off like collecting Disney toys sets and McDonald's that was like her plan to retire She would collect these and put them in bot like shoe boxes under and this is why I let my father my mom's kids are Frantic, I was like the first sign of it like my dad would come home and they just be boxes of shoe boxes And he'd open them up and it'd be like Princess Diana bears. She'd make you wear the bus light. And the next year she would take me to McDonald's.

She'd be like, you hungry? They'd be like, no, she's like, we're going to McDonald's. So we would just go around and listen to how sick it was. We go around more than once because she'd be like, we have to get three bus light years and that means they're only get the maxes too. We got to go around again. So I'd have like a burger and then go around again for an ice cream like that's how sick Yeah, I grew up and you like it or do you become like I was I I was an actor as little kid so I got fat

You were an actor I was a child actor. I was a little guy. What did you do? I did like Sesame Shoot a bunch I did yeah, yeah, Comedy Central skit a bunch of NYU student films nothing huge nothing huge So I was fun his by was still better than mine just Yeah, well it was like around 12 or 13 the acting stopped and then you would I started to really So real depression just depression 12 just Piling Parents overweight my mom is overweight my dad has gotten himself because he went on with family.

Well, one of her personalities are. Yeah, one of her personalities is fat. The other three are no, and she was, but that's how you would get her. I would go. We would, I came out of an audition once and this is what I said to my parents. I said, listen, and they said they, they said our kid really has his head screwed on straight. This is what I said to them.

I said, I didn't get the part, but can we still go to McDonald's? And my dad said to my mom, he goes, you know what, that's a kid that's really got to say, no, that's a food addiction. You know what I mean? That's a sick, for an eight year old kid to go, I didn't get the part, but can I just have three fish?

But hold on until I was 27, I think that, I would love, dude, I could make McDonald's problem. Right, four or five times a week, up until I was in my mid 20s. Yeah, but you're gonna stand too, that like my grandfather, they didn't have McDonald's. Right. You went to a fucking restaurant.

You had foodies. Some of the some asshole cooking. You went to the first McDonald's. Yes. You know, but it's like things on plates. Think about the, think about how many people we have to feed. Think about how many, this, you feed. Think about how many this, you know what amazes me?

This will fucking blows my mind, is being on like a plane, and eating a filet mignon. Right. It's like how, I know how hard it is. Like you go to the thing and there's a date on it, and then you gotta eat it before. How the fuck did this last?

You know how the fuck did this, like You know, how the fuck did this, like in the middle of the country, is their lobster. I know they caught it, and what the fuck did they have to do to that, to make it last two months? What they said is like, like, you look at deli meat, it's there forever.

As soon as they cut it, it's good for fucking four days. How the fuck does that happen? Preservatives. I know what the fuck is that manipulation. I think it's the cause of the predecessors. Right. What the fuck are they putting in these things to you know, small young touts They're going to get them right into the middle of the day. The only way to keep something was to fucking smoke it, Salt it and that's it. Oh that's what you're talking about. You're a smoke it, salted fuck it, done. Boom, dude. Can you believe what I'm saying? Now, people in Europe aren't fat because they buy something

in the afternoon, eat it that night and they're done with it. They don't say that. So, so people always go, why are Italians mad? Cause they have all that pasta. Italians do the pasta is such a small portion of their real fucking fish and chicken and all this great meat.

But they also don't work hard. They don't do anything to the extreme and there's nothing to the extreme. There's no fast food places over there either. Right. There's no snacking. Yeah. Didn't they ban and Sweden? Some do actually book the last big Mac and like has it and he's just been sitting in a jar. It's all changed. Unchanged for three years. He bought it from the last big ever sold in the country. The McDonald's is fun. That is like a father. He was talking about it's fun that is like okay you're talking about it's a classic okay you're gonna go get ribs at McDonald's

right how the fuck how do you bite through the bone? it's not real ribs but I know but how the fuck do they make how do they it's like where does this fucking food and it has to travel right right is where I want to see the kitchen I want to see it's a lab

it's not a kitchen okay but where do they okay they make the hamburger somewhere, right? Where do they make the hamburger? Like, what's the point? Have anybody ever seen the process? Yeah, they, it's in their documentary where there's clubbing cows in the head over and over with the amers.

Like, fuck you, cow! I hope your mom gets AIDS. Yeah. That's the process for all meat in the factory. Yeah, but, I mean, where, like, where does it become with patty? Like, you know, they see that show how it's made, and they show the thing, and then the soda bottle

comes down, and the thing, I've never seen McDonald's how it's made. They would never want that. That was losing money now for the first time. McDonald's is in 50 years, McDonald's probably won't be around. It's good, that's a positive thing. It's an idea.

I almost feel bad though, because you understand McDonald's is demonized like those golden arches Or we go like fuck you guys you're evil, but it's it's called Just as bad but dude they're fucking demons They're the ones that fucked us. They're the ones that when we stop when we travel to go back to Boston the only place I can go is fucking McDonald's I have a problem with the like a nature zone that company where they're pretending that it's healthy food Yeah, at least McDonald's says fuck you dude triple cheeseburger put it in your fucking Oh, it's like that's like that's like the nuts when you go to buy a bag of nuts

But it's little clustered together Chips and M&M those kind bars those just me and a fine bars aren't good at all. They came out and said it. Yeah me and a zip card just fucking throwing down candy Like a worse thing you can have right Yeah, right? Well, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,. Yeah, the mix flurry. Yeah, the mix moving. Yeah, it's F. I I ate yesterday clean for the first time. What's clean clean? Okay, so I woke up spratzol to Boo

I'm blocked. I'm gonna call you to have it. Yeah, I I woke up yesterday. I had scrambled eggs with ham and a one piece of cheese. Okay, okay, I had scrambled eggs with ham and one piece of cheese. Okay, okay. I had some strawberries and I had an orange with that. Okay, that's coming. Then for lunch, I had a salad with pecans, rolled up roast beef, rolled up cheese, and vinegar and oil dressing. No sugar.

She made it. You understand? So there's no sugar at it. And then for dinner, squash, chicken, grilled, like a chicken coat on blue with no breading. No breading. She made it without the breading. It was egg and butter she put on it

So and there you go and then later that night I got fucking hungry. Yeah, my thing was kicking in so I had I beaties I had a one-meep ball, but what she doesn't make it with a little bit of she doesn't do she doesn't do I do like She doesn't do right. Yeah bread crumbs. It's mostly meat. I do oatmeal And I do like a third of what the recipe calls for because oatmeal it really gets it stuck together I think she does it with she makes it with cheese actually. You know what I do? I do she make cheese keeps the meat all together. I do a bacon Bacon cheddar meat fucking so hungry

Bacon bacon cheddar meat fucking so how you do listen You got to tell Dawn to do this dude you take them me tell fucking don't tell me no tell don't hold on You I take a little hunks of cheese and I put it in the meatloaf mix Yeah, and then I wrap it in bacon the whole thing the bottom of the pan and then the top of it So when you cut into it, it just cheese going out of it It's what about peanut butter with no added sugar? Like, it's like a sweet, yes, the crunchy kind. Yeah, I eat that, but I mean, you have to, it takes weeks to get that,

to get off of crunchy, skipping, which is the best thing in the entire world. No, apples less than all natural peanut butter. It's honestly phenomenal. Phenomenal, once you get over. Or figs, figs is a great, like, natural, like, sweet figs. Whoa. Allagged.

All right, listen, we're gonna wrap this up cause I'm fucking starving again. Yeah, but I'm back on, I'm fucking, I just can't do it. Yeah. I can't. I'm fucking fine. I felt, I slept last night for the first time in a long time. I was waking up like a fucking after my barbecue.

How great was the food of my barbecue though? It was really good. You missed out on that. How come you didn't come? I was on the road Where? comics and foxwoods What a great time even though it rained it was fucking great. I mean it was half full that night, but um You know what your show? Yeah, I was good. Yeah, we knew it was half full The go mites all the thousands of go mitesites show up. A very big fucking venue, buddy. It's four hundred.

I know, dude. I was nowhere near half full. It's a hard room to sell. And they have a beautiful theater right across the street. They're moving, you know. Where are they moving? Moving to the... To what room?

I don't know, but I know they're taking... I think they're taking all that shit over. Are they taking over the theater or what can you say? That place? And really? I think like four rooms are that shit over. Are they taking over the theater on Mug and Son? Yeah. That place. And really? I think like four rooms are gonna be using. Wow, that's a big move. Wow.

Like that, that, you wanna know, talk about eating, dude, that gig is so fucking awesome. Mug and Son, because when you work there, they give you something called the sludge card and it basically gets you free food the whole time you're working. And you could just go into the, the employee cafeteria for a mega casino. So it's's thousands of employees so it has like fucking buffet lines every everything you want and you get unlimited food yeah I can't I can't I don't do

that anymore because it makes me feel like the the I'd rather just I like doing coupons I don't like doing coupons because I've been poor most of my life and I feel like when I use a coupon the poor I feel like yeah like my wife's a nickel chaser show fucking you know throw a cute coupon at me I'm leaving you this 20% I like to pay full price because I can because I never could do I Dunkin donuts coupon on the internet. I just offer Facebook. I downloaded it like I said meant for a week I got free Dunkin donuts I know because I'm saying because I don't have to you still do yeah But I know I'm gonna shit my pants. All right, let's go to the chat room real quick Yeah, sure James Pasquay asks what do you guys think about sign-failed refusing to play colleges?

He doesn't personally didn't say that he doesn't refuse to play call he doesn't need to play colleges He doesn't need because he's a fucking multi-multi-m- he has four to a million dollars in the bank. He doesn't need to do a college and deal with that. He was commenting on the PC. What happened with colleges? They used to be a place for freedom of thought and speech and where you'd go and everybody could be anybody they wanted to be. Now it's pretty much politically correct. You everybody's the same. You don't make fun of anybody. If you're gonna play a college, you can't make fun of, they'll say to you, you can't make fun of women, don't make fun of blacks, don't make fun of race or religion. So you have to, as a

comic, that's against everything. I don't even understand how to do a college. I know. Well, I used to do them all the time. And there is dirty back then. Well, you could be dirtier. Now, you're gonna offend somebody. If you're at a college, you will offend somebody. I know. I know. I know.

I know. I know. He brought me to open one time. He had a letter because I opened up for him. I know. I'm just doing race shit, I've done whatever. And he told me to be, he was like cleaning up a little. And I'm like, dude, I learned to clean up as much as I could.

So they wrote him a letter and they had like the entire stume on it. His opening was, hey, Faggot. They had the entire stume body sign it. And instead of being like, that's my friend that brought him, he threw me onto the bus. He's like, dude, I never met that guy. They told me.

Yeah, because Nate has a fucking family and Nate is clean. And Nate can do a college. And he can make, I get it. Nate, you know what you're money Nate could make at a college because he, his is not he's not catering He's that guy. Yeah, Nate is a clean. It just doesn't act but there there has So I think that what Seinfeld is saying is funny because calling Quinn's book just came out

Which is a calling book about all of this you should get it I bought it today I read I read the first does a sample you can buy which is hilarious. It's yeah, it's calling Quinn the coloring book by calling Quinn and That's actually what it's called. Yeah You know the it says in the book. He book, and he says it in such a dumb way that I can understand it, and also he's so smart that smart people can understand it too, that he's basically we are different, we're not all the same. There is different things with different races and different people.

And just because you say something racist about somebody doesn't make you a racist, there's somebody who uses the N word in traffic isn't the leader of the Clu-Clux clan. You know what I mean? Just like a black guy who hates a white guy doesn't hate all white people. They're the white friends that they would die for and protect. New arms.

It was a nuance to everything. Everybody's different. So I think that I'm glad that fucking Seinfeld doesn't have to stick up for us, for you, for comedians. It's our job to fucking talk about fucked up shit and race and women and make fun of it. It's a job to do that stuff. So the kids are being brought up that,

you know, we're all the same, we're fucking not. We should be able to talk about it. So what else? Buddy, see Buddy says, more Puerto Rican snake venom, please I don't know if you can get much more than today Skop will be okay. We'll get past this I don't know he hasn't made eye contact with me for the time. I don't know dude. That was kind of fucked up

Well, I just heard a buzz somebody's talking about me. Go ahead Michael Ven Heddle says YKWD blurring the lines between podcast and hospital waiting room God man, is this your chat? Yeah, these are the ones I'm picking out these these catering towards you a fucking I'm finding the balance man. I'm finding balance be you or positive me you don't be such a pussy But he yelled at by this guy and all of a sudden you're a fucking I should get rid of you yeah all right well it's your call we're gonna go nowhere just home all right go ahead I'll fire I'll fire ding dong for you oh really I don't want to I'm good then next buddy see buddy says next episode we should want we watch food incorporated with Bobby I fuck that up Jack.

Uh poor what buddy with buddy you smashed his joke that he rewritten asked his wife it was funny. What do you think about this? Don't say that. That's too mean. All right. God what else. Black Gospel says the girl looks like she's at the French open.

She's been turning her head left and right the whole time. What else you got? Go to Bobby chat. Uh buddy see buddy says he was very active today. Buddy see buddy says. she's at the French open she's been turning her head left and right the whole time what else you got go to bobby chat uh... buddy see buddy says he's what he was very active today buddy see buddy says that buddy but a block into louis jay is nates closing bit on his new cd yeah he is

what's a bit uh... talk to tell the story about how i freaked out in the McDonald's oh yeah yeah yeah all together what else anything else uh... iraq to wraps as quick freaked out in the McDonald's. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. You can tie it all together. That's funny. What else? Anything else? I rock to rap says Chris Rock was saying the same thing as Seinfeld in the New Yorker recently. Well Chris Rock should be the feather that because he,

you know, he's the guy, but he's black so he can say anything. That's what Colin said on the view today. They will, you know, but white guys, you know, speech is being in for, we can't talk about anything anymore. Yeah. You know, which is true. I love being Puerto Rican. Like just the little tiny bit of Puerto Rican that I am gives me so much freedom to say such awesome stuff. I don't think it's a little bit of Puerto Rican. Anyways, all right. Oh well, we're going to close the show and be getting the bomb bandanna. I listen. It's been a crazy show today. I've been

recovering from my illness But I enjoyed it. I think it was pretty crazy. I know that we've ended some friendships We've probably maybe cleared out some cobwebs in the attic and Learned a little bit about ourselves today. I Appreciate you coming on there. Have a minute. Yeah? Dude, yeah, come on again, would you? This was a, I loved every minute of it. All right, so it might not be Chris Booking the Show, but maybe Lewis.

I might read you out to you. But can you say one thing, fans, if you would rather see me as a producer of the show, instead of Chris Gopal, just tweet at Bobby, tweet at WaikiduD podcast. I, look, I wouldn't say I wouldn't take Chris's job. Let me show Chris the ropes. Have him work under me for a month, right? Let me fix Fundamental problems with Chris and how did my show become because my show is popular like it's become very popular

Yeah, like it's it's more popular than a lot of shows. Yeah, well, it's but it's plateau But no, but no and actually hasn. It's actually grown in the last six months it's gotten more problem than it's ever been. I don't know why, but it's getting more popular. It's not the actual video portion of it, right? I mean, we're doubling that. And now, I mean, it's actually becoming better and better. It's not.

How do we explain that if the show? You are, Bobby, this is the problem. You're too good. You're just too good of a person. You don't even see the fact that you're blowing up in the industry. You had a brand new hour comedy central. You're a fucking Louise brother on Louis.

You're all over TV. You have a brand new show, Sex and Drugs and Rock and Roll premiering this July 17th. 16th on FX yeah unbelievable show you're about to be a fucking international superstar okay so the problem is you're not even seeing that yeah that's obviously why the show is growing you just go cocky no you just made me dizzy I think you just went cocky dude but you need I don't know what that was but I think one I just

went the other way yeah it's something just happened dude you need I don't know what that was, but I think one I just went the other way. Yeah, it's something just happened Dude, you need to isn't me you need to take care you need to take advantage of this momentum that the show has on your Industry, so it is going it has momentum it is huge momentum. I'm not saying I'm not saying I'm kidding It hasn't plateaued. I'm just saying the problem is the show's gonna premiere on July 6th Okay, millions of people are gonna start tuning into the show every week And they're gonna have a fucking No, but when the show percent milk program because of Chris Scopo and when the show when the show happens I'm gonna switch it over just to an interview show one person a week I'm gonna stop doing the show that's okay. So I'm just gonna do a Mark Maran thing will be like just famous people

So it will just be me or Colin or me or Norton a Voss, or whoever the famous people are once a week. You probably, it'll probably be a better show. You think? I know, dude, let me tell you something. I'm having you and all everybody, just a bunch of hooves on, really has fucked up my fucking show. You know, I'm fucking famous this show would've been,

if I could've just had Keith Robinson, fucking Colin, if I could just Voss, I had the fucking the hoo's of who's not of whoville on every week and then as soon as you guys got popular you just went off and did your own fucking shows and left me in the dust with fucking him and what's her name no kidding I'm kidding so what do you got man? Third Saturday every month long I was sitting in the cave 10 p.m. we do a free comedy show oh shoot I gotta I gotta go over to him and I miss come anytime you want to pack it out third to once a month dude what is it

what night's it on it's the third Saturday so every month at the third Saturday what's on 10 p.m. dude I might do that cuz I want to get the fuck out of the city on the Saturday and then hang out and go somewhere else yeah all right cool man you want to come back on would you thanks a lot thanks for having me got a beer it was great happy on the the show Tim. I'll make it happen Absolutely, what's up, man? Guys, I'm gonna be headlong. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Where was that my producer? Well, yeah, I was your producer talking. Oh, okay. Yeah, okay

Tim what that happened? Something big coming up. Let me know we'll make sure we listen like snuff a love I guess I just got these boogers and my nose, it's killing me. Go ahead. What do you got guys? This upcoming Father's Day weekend, I'll be back up in fucking Santa. This Father's Day weekend. We're gonna do it up there.

On the headline in comedy underground, which is the weed bar up in Toronto. Love that place. That it's one of the first of all, the lady around it, she's the shit dude. She's awesome. Literally, I'm not even making this up. My favorite place to go on the road. It's a 420 friendly place. You can smoke weed. Dude, she's the shit dude. She's awesome. Literally, I'm not even making this up. My favorite place to go on the road.

It's a 420 friendly place. You can smoke weed. Dude, it's so laid back. It's such a fun home. I can only do like an hour there and I have to get off stage. Oh, because it's so much weed in here. Last time I was there was packed

and I was just up there. Halfway through I was just like, I was like, I was like, I got you, go man. Thank you for that. You guys were never bad at it. I pat it on somebody's dog for like a half hour. I was like, yeah, you, man. Thank you, man. As we know, I pat it. I pat it at somebody's dog for like a half hour. I was like, yeah, I'm a diva. Well, I'll be there June 18th, and then that Friday

and Saturday, the 19th and 20th, I'm going to be in Windsor, Canada, headlining the comedy quarry. So call it. Check me. Windsor. Book it out. All right. What's up, man?

I want to be doing a standup on the left. Just people are fun like me. I mean, I am doing standup on the top. I'm doing be doing a standup on that and just people are fun like me. I am doing this was coming I'm in a circle. It's alright. I know I did. I just was getting jealous of all your shows. I just All they're in Canada. I don't care. I want to go everywhere. I know. So go with him. Can't come with me. Yeah, he can go with him. Are you? Are you? Are you? Are you? I'm gonna be scoples talking about. I have more than any more. Yeah, he's a comic. Don't go. I won't go with him. Are you are you? Are you? Scoble's talking about I have a boyfriend. Yeah, he's a comic. Don't go. I won't go with Robbie.

Robbie. Robbie Sloughock. Funny guy. Do I know? I know Robbie. Robbie. That's what we should have. You too.

That would have been a great one. I'll tell you. Yeah. Have you both done at the same time? Bob, let me know. I will figure that out. Let's just let's figure out. Everyone's schedule one.

But no, I'm at the stand. We do. We run stand up on the spot, which is a totally improvised standup show, which is completely volatile and scary and so much fun. And we have Jay on all the time and a lot of really fun people. And that's a shame, which is not volatile for him at all. Because he doesn't write jokes. And that's what he does. Oh, big Jay.

No, not for it. But it's nice to, you know, he makes the whole thing comfortable because the rest of us are like, ah, but it's, it's very fun. You go out of your comfort zone. He's not right jokes at all. No. But it's it's very fun you go at your It's not right jokes at all Nah But as are his jokes that he does new every time old jokes that he does legit like crowd work He doesn't like he doesn't do like we've seen some comments where they have right worked crowd work

Yeah, like the shit you know the person I'm not shitting on him by the way I'm just asking no look he look he is he's the best at crowd works That's what he does yeah, it's nice that he's kind of like I just called him yesterday I just talked to the fuck yeah, you told yes, I first I talked to he could I go talk to him I felt bad. I didn't invite him to the barbecue. Oh, I was I called I called him to invite him to the barbecue. I left a message right and he never got back to me And I was like oh shit. I hope he's not offended.

That it was kind of like later, later. But it was, I called actually somebody else. It was in the same B.J.A. part. It was somebody else. So then I sent him a text yesterday, hey, what the fuck, you didn't get my message? And they were like, hey, no, and I read, I was like, oh, that's the wrong guy.

That's hilarious. So then that's when I asked for his number. So, I would like to do that's a real guy. That's hilarious. So then that's when I asked for his number. So, I would like to do that too. Absolutely. It's once a month you get the end on like a Wednesday, it's Wednesday the 24th day. Thank you for coming on. Thanks for having me.

And what's your Twitter? At Casey Balsham. All right, I appreciate it. It was a crazy show. It was fun. But I thought it was fucking interesting and great. Very interesting. That's why I like doing this show because I don't know

what the fuck gonna happen week to week. I mean, I I know if Lewis comes on he's gonna have a problem with somebody And then at the end he usually his energy goes down because he hasn't eaten and he'll just be quiet for the second half and be analytical and less feisty You know, he's like a pit bull a good choke by a fucking lady I got no I don't have the band in it. I got it. So anyway, scope. Oh, are you all right? Yeah, I'm good. Are you mad? I'm all right. Yeah. Are you gonna try to punch me in the head as I walked down the stairs? No, he's not gonna put no I'm above you. Sorry. Oh Shit Just admit it was you with the thing so we can move on it was you it was you with that right? Just so we can move on. Yeah, yeah fine. I'm sorry Bobby was the board. I fucked up the whole show

It's me I'm the problem with why you just admit it. Okay. I am it was you guys I told me guys. All right none of my ideas are valid guys Why are you talking about ideas? I have a lot of ideas for the show. Well, no, no that I'm talking about just that you Someone to plug that I am like it. We're move past that. I'm the new producer of the show Scopo you're gonna work directly underneath me deep whou, you're fine for now, you're good. Scopo's the intern for the next week. That's not you, just hire Deepu for you. No, no, I can't actually come to the show.

My team didn't like him that much. He had a lot of attitude. So, they did negative attitude. So, Scopo, here's a deal. Okay, I'm the producer for the next month. Scopo's my intern. I can't make it every week, because they're not going on.

But Scopo will be here. I'll be sure. Well, let's do this. Let's make you the producer. Okay. And you will inherit the show when I leave if you stop doing real-ass dude. Okay. Really? That's what I said.

I can't. Let's have Zach come on this show and we have fucking real-ass podcasts. We should have Zach on. Zach is a pillar, dude. He's so I love you I'm so fucking have him on is he but is he this what I don't like though I don't like when people have built up to be on the show. I don't want like you know I know that's why I don't want to have to come in here I don't want a month of trail down and have him come in with the fucking bunch of zingers. He wrote down

No, no, he's not like dude scope. Let's put our bullshit aside. Is that not a fucking killer? Yeah, he's scoplet. Let's put our bullshit aside. Is Zach not a fucking killer? Yeah, he's pretty fucking He's like a guy Bratto, don't at place no he that's Robbie Bernstein no, he's he looks like a monster He looks like what's her name from the Drew Carri show? Mimi he looks at Mimi from the Drew Carri show dude. He's got crazy like punk right here He's fucking three hundred pounds of scussing to look at all right He's got the died here. Yeah, he got the died here. He's wet. like punk right here. He's fucking three pounds of disgust in the look at all right Yeah, you got the died here. He's wet. Alright, so anyways, um, all right, so check it out. Here's the deal

I want you to do a few things for us. I want you to go and buy Colin Quinn's book It's called the coloring book comedian solves race relations in America calling Quinn, okay? You can get it on your phone, your iPad, wherever, iTunes. Go get the book. And I want you to buy this shirt right here. The comedy seller shirt. You can go to the website or you can just come down when you're in the village and you go into the club which everybody does every week because it's sold out every show and grab yourself 20 fucking bucks.

And if you want, grab one of those. Robert Kennedy live at the village underground Get that right at ridecast calm Make sure you go to Robert Kelly live calm. What are my dates coming up? Well the producer has them Yeah, well why would I have his fucking dates memorized it? I was named the producer moments ago my intern Chris Gopo does have your dates though Hey, I'm sorry the producer always reads in more for the end of the show Hey, I'm fuck face. Oh, damn

I haven't have them I have this is loaded up on my thing. So put the password in it. Hey, how about this Chris? Let's not fuck me right now Because you have a problem. He's trying to prove a point by giving me a lot of fun. Go ahead. Read my dates. Hey guys, if you're a fan of Bobby and we all know you are. Did you unblock him? Lewis. Yeah, that's a temporary thing. Yeah. Guys coming up this June 27th, he's gonna be at Treehouse comedy club in sports haven New Haven, Connecticut. That's actually with myself and fat ass Chris Scopo. Yeah, uh, was gonna be pretty crazy.

Well, we went up You one of them might not be one of us might not be able to be in the car So we'll see what happens also the weekend of the 16th 17th and 18th Gotham comedy club here in New York City July 24th and 25th comedy cove Springfield, New Jersey all the 7th and 8th He's gonna be a governor's and McGuire's out in Bohemia, New York that's out in Long Island with 10 villains.th, he's going to be a governor's and McGuire's out in Bohemia, New York. That's out in Long Island with 10 villains, all stomping ground.

Salt Lake City, Utah, the West Club, August 20th or 22nd. September, he's got the comedy shop in Jersey, just for Lafsteronto coming up at the end of September. Guys, make sure you go to robbercallylive.com for all dates information and updates, news, special. Especially, you guys can actually purchase from his website directly, only $5. dot com for all dates information and updates news like special especially you guys can actually purchase from his website directly only five dollars check this out there it's fucking uncensored so even if you saw it on comedy censor you saw a show of what fucking Bobby Kelly is so and believe me this

motherfucker is blowing up guys bigger than ever not just physically in the industry Robert Kelly live dot com go check him, the fuck out. Alright, check it out. Make sure Toronto, just for laughs. I don't know where I'm playing. I don't know. It's not done yet, okay? The shows are available. I am playing up there. So if you live in Toronto, I want to pack these places out, so make sure you, you know, fucking go to the website, JFL 42, and check it out and email them, request information, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Alright, so you guys are the best, thanks for listening to the You Know What, DEEE Podcast.

Alright, cast. You've been listening to the YKWD podcast. Thanks for listening. Now go back to your shitty jobs. Shitty jobs. Shitty jobs. Check out riotcast.com for all the best podcasts on the internet. And they're all free. And they're all free. And they're all free. Shhhhh! Shhhhh! Shhhhh!

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