Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Yankee Swap 2018

Episode Date: December 24, 2018

Bobby, Vos, Liz and the Regulars List, Soder and Gomez are all here for another year of the YKWD tradition! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're listening to Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude on the Riotcast Network Riotcast.com Welcome to the funniest podcast on the planet Earth. This is gonna be a cost-effective podcast. No rules. What are the my-gass haul? I'm sure I've already said should I regret? Can I get a mic or? No!

That was trying to keep it like a comic-head. I have a bunch of you guys on. It's just us sitting down Sometimes it's hilarious sometimes it's having no topics no directions. I love doing it Side to the coin I want to do you think my podcast is popular. I might affect some people's life. You never know. It's Robert Kelly, so you know what to podcast on flightcast.com. You got headphones on dumb dumb Well now, well this is a good way to start our Christmas show. What's wrong with Lewis? Why can't we have one nice Christmas show? I think it's important to know because people don't know at home. Wait a minute. It's a service Guys, we yeah, Yeah, we did. It's like sorry we're the crores.

Do we understand that Lewis just left the room to take a hat off? What's under your hat? What happened? What happened? There's something wrong with you. I didn't show my head. I didn't feel like fucking having my burn victim head on camera. Oh, why is your burn victim head?

He looks like Pesci in home alone. I don't know. I don't know. I only robo cop. You're just going to robo cop to his house. No, I've never seen it. Can I see what it looks like Pescian home alone Only Robocop here's gonna Robocop to his helmet off. No, I've never seen it. Can I see what it looks like? Yeah, it's fucking exactly what it is. I'm right what happened. It's a mess. It's ugly But you're showing your face. It's like I'd like Bobby show me your fucking Taint you had nothing no I'm gonna show your taint. No, it looks like a dead octopus

Robocop with his helmet off. See there we go. All right guys You guys got to bring it coffee and turns no pull up Pesci's head after he gets burned. Yeah I'm gonna get my hand when he walks in the door. It gets it all blown. Yeah Why is it that bad? So you're like a ring. You just had a ring around your head, but what had it happened? You was 18. they're going bald. Oh dude, you're going crazy. We're getting dead, that's ridiculous.

Yeah. Anyways, we got the, you know what dude's bad. We got the regulars and some others. Other, other, not others, other. Well, there's a guy in the coach. And he's a Jew. Yes. Yes.

You know what? And the guy in the couch is there. Stop talking. We always have people here. Where did you get these hats, my head's itching? This is your hat from last year. It's the same hat. I would never be an elf twice.

Yeah, yeah, you're always an elf. We got, of course, Joe Lists. We have. Fucking Joe's fun hat. It's an elf diving into his brain. I'd switch hats, but I want to catch your dumb haircut. I'd think you had great. It sucks. You got to live around the front of it.

Elves, you got to, you got to, you got to elf liver. That's fucking awesome. You sick dude. You can drink a lot of Elves. What is that? I don't even know. It's an elf. That's a good elf nut.

I think there he is. One testicle. That's how they make eggnog. We don't even know where we get. One creative hat. That's it. One fucking creative hat. fucking creative dude riches fucking one salmon away for looking like a acroid in trading places good save that's what you turn your ankle but then you put a hand down to stay up it was the

joke of you know when they used to drop the arm when someone had the sleeper hold we got rich boss the legend self proclaim had the sleeper hold. Oh, that was a good hand. We got rich boss, the legend, self proclaim, let the legend, right? Well, it's throughout the industry now. The industry? Yes. I got a call from the industry today. Really?

Yes. What'd they say? High legend. Not every Jew was in the industry. It could have just been an evil. It's like, what the hell? I was in the air. Somebody of... Oh my God! I just been out of here. I felt it coming. Somebody in the air. Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Anzota straight from billions. Why are you saying like that? I love billions straight from billions. You're what the fuck?

I was secure about hey, why is one of my personalized size condoms over there? It's a visual joke on audio medium body Bobby laughed and we play fucking YouTube videos I got an acroid pulled up there Thank you. That was a great save that he looks like that. Yeah, Joe was right. It was a safe It wasn't a starting when it was a safe save that he looks like that. Yeah, Joe was right, it was a save. It wasn't a starting win, it was a save. And of course we got Lewis J Gomez, Puerto Rican Rattles, Puerto Rican Rass,

the Junk Jett of Comedy, the podcast Robocop, and AK, the real ass black belt killer. Black belt killer. How was that your new one? I like that one. I know it was moniker. Can you do a t-shirt that says Lewis J Gomez,

and you know how they do the quotes from critics and stuff? Can you put all your names around it? Sure. I'd buy that. I can do that. I want to 100 bucks from you. Did you want to 100 bucks? What? When I bet Bobby on your phone,

Bobby, you fucking beg against me. You were Ryan O'Neil. I didn't explain this to everybody. I'll kick you in your fucking fight. You know why? I'll tell you why. I'll tell you why. You're a fucking beggar. You're a fat friend. Well, he said fucking asshole. It's good to everybody. I'll kick you in your fucking body. I'll tell you why. I'll tell you why. You have a back on your stuff. Have a back friend. Well, that's fucking asshole. It's good. Me first of all, we've got to get to

front and we've left to find to see who took you and I won. That's not true. That's not true. I'm just trying to break the ice. Stop getting scared by his fucking voice. Why am I saying he's coming from the fucking bed on me again. It did. That's the way he talks. Listen, we were out front with 20 people watching on my iPad, I bought the fight, and we're trying to get action going, nobody's taking action.

No, nobody would take action. So I was like, wait, wait, wait, before that, I didn't watch the fight with you. I fucking, you're lying. I fucking ran a joke, you don't have to fucking tell me about my life. What are you, asshole? You want Jewish?

You're not a fuck. I'm honest. I don't like liars. You're not honest. I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys.

I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys.

I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys. I'm out of onesys. Camio and do you know Camio is yeah Yeah, it's where you pay people to say stuff people pay you to like you like you like a pay Bobby Kelly to like say a message Like happy birthday, and you're a big fan, you know Diane fucking whatever You get for nothing right you know you gotta bring in an extra Six year I was making fun of it because I've just ordered stunk and then we went on it and we found out the

Yannis did it like in real time and then I couldn't back that all it stinks So my ass was saying yeah, it is what real time and then I couldn't backpad all it stinks So my ass was saying. Yeah. It is what it is. So then I found out for $39 you could pay Yannis to dress up like Marisa and wish you happy birthday. Yeah. So we should we should do for $28. We'll dress up like Marisa and wish people happy birthday. But so I sent him a thing right I paid for it.

I have that bandana, please. Wow. It's like a story. I don't want to see this but on the show so what I did was I We paid him the $39 to say hi and we're still with hi. I'm Jonas popus. I'm a faggot You're listening to the real-est podcast So we had to do it $39.decent for my dignity Wait, but is he factually obligated to do it? But he had to return the money. He had to go for that process.

That's great. They can say no, but they have to return the money. That's it. That's my game. It would have been funnier if you had someone there when he opened the email that he had to do that. He got sold on another order. Yeah. There's no way he didn't laugh at that. There's no way he might be mad at that. There's no way. He might not be mad. He might be mad that. Why did you text them? Cause he hit me up and he just,

he was like trying to bust my balls about it, but it just wasn't hidden. What do you mean? He was like, yeah, he was like, I guess I'm gonna keep that $39 that you probably need. And I was like, I guess, I mean, I just, for a joke,

I just spent $39. I guess, the point of view, oh dude, that is a great profile pic. What a real estate fuck it is not judge on that. I want to make this fair everyone on their sucks. It's not judge honest.

No, it's talking about the photo. It looks like he's on a park bench. Him and Aruma race should be selling times. Marriott. What if I told you you could live in Orlando part time Looking you could be positive too. I'm honest pop this They hit me up to do it and I was like no stop hitting me up. They didn't respond Ask me a couple times. I just didn't respond to it

It seems like it's something you would do for free. Yeah, like if someone's like hey It's my friend's birthday is a big fan could you say hello? If someone's like, hey, it's my friend's birthday, he's a big fan, could you say hello? But, no, he's gonna do that. Nobody's gonna survive it. So many people to be like, Jellis, for the birthday. There's nobody's ever asked me,

I hate you, my friend's a big fan when you sent him a video for his birthday. Nobody's ever asked for it. There's no need for it. That's it, can I just say something? That's after the show, my friend couldn't make it. Yes, exactly. So, can you, yeah, hey, fuckface, where are you?

You're fucking, fucking, cock, fucking, shit, fuckface, fuck your mother. You should have came Thank you saving with the voice. I mean you know I'm here. Lewis is explosive some voices Yeah, you brought us all back together Honestly, okay, it's time they ask you to do that after the show They want you to be the meanest you can possibly mean to. And it raises, just calm, calm the end word. It's like, what's he's black?

What are you, what's wrong with you? Who else is on? What's wrong with you? No. Who else is on this, who else is on that we know? Camille, any of other friends? Don't, Sean Donnelly, what's that? Nothing.

Donnelly's on there. Here's the problem with this. Here's the problem with this. Chris is definitely on there. I mean, come with this. Here's the problem with this. Chris is the stuff in there. I mean, come on, we get some good ones. You can get some good promos for it. You know what dude?

If I spend $39 a pop. Yeah, but they're going to return them all. You don't know that? So now wait, they go to the money. Show them the money. Show them Donally's taking that fucking money. I'll do it. You want me to do what?

Come on. You want me to do what? Come on. You want me to do what? Come on. You're gonna see dude. How many use for you? Don't give me my money. I can see your implicit or Sean darling is everyone's impression of you. Yeah. Oh my god. I got one impression. I got two. I got already lagged, which is kind of me. Yeah. Um, yeah. Yeah. I'm gonna be absolutely. Dude,

well, you want fun, the top button on your thing, please no, yeah, I like it like that Is the show over yeah D street like I don't go way back with your podcast you go way back with me Yeah, yeah, but your podcast like they were there three. Oh, they were kind of. Me and Joe did me and Joe Deroze did it first. No one cared about it that time. We had a little bit of blue and then Garbazio. And there's a real. And Bobby used to do stand-up solo and that was horrible. So what did I add Dan come on one time because Joe was like, oh, this kid's funny.

He came down when he was swinging guacamole, but a Mexican restaurant. He used to stand up too. Like he was working radio. You worked like rock and roll radio. Yeah, I worked to K-Rock. I can't even show the rock and roll radio. You're like a woman.

Yeah, you worked in the talkies, right? You worked in the talkies now.? You worked in the talkies now. I heard of that. You selling war bonds? The old man did that. Ah, it's a different time. You remember about your marks? You should do a bit similar to that.

Ah, boss has got cat skill stories. Give us a see the mirror bit. Yeah. Ah, anyway. That was great. That's, so we had Dan on. And then Dan told me, oh, you gotta have this kid Joe on.

I thought Joe told you about Dan. No, no. No, Deroza told me. Joe, Deroza told me about Dan. Dan, of course, I built the relationship with Lewis because he lived on my block. Sexual. And I would always say,

you lived in the fucking kid. You get that's one of the work that's been around. Now, New York City, there's one block separate. I lived in a good neighborhood. One block away, he lived in the fucking... I lived on the highway in like a studio apartment. Yeah, that was slanted I remember doing hammer fisting. I remember doing hammer fishing in that and it felt like the hotel room that Tom Pat Tom Hanks gets in big right when he gets big I'm laughing because the joke was so bad you didn't even come up the joke You just said Asians you said slanted he couldn't come up with a bit so he just went Asian

I just wanted to let you know Agents you said slanted he couldn't come up with a bit so he's like Agents You We can Loose can do it because he is a spec Whoa everyone's careers are over Rears are over Hannah Gatsby coming for you Exactly I fucking bitch I fuck body I'm fucking I fuck body Dude is never in his The word dude is a weed

Come at me, oh. I'm a dude now I want to do Bobby's post comedy career Funny, but keep telling the show I am I know how to run the show We just laugh and I was taking a little break. What's the matter Mike? Becky you can be blocked by that bag right there. It's good. That's my gift. That's how good it is I heard it yet. So then I had him on and they just have Joe on now when they first had him on They were both fucking kind of alkeys the first show they were way away. They drank little no him and Dan Yeah, drank all I had at the fridge full of the first time I did the show is at your house. Yeah, they're we drive so the same I frankly ripped it

And then of course me and the alcohol now you want alcohol. Yeah, there we go. So the same. And I fracked it. I ripped it. I ripped it. And then of course, me and the alcohol now. You want alcohol, yeah. Can we get some whiskey? There's whiskey. No, you have some fucking whiskey. Yeah, we got Jameson. Yeah, Jameson.

I don't know. What do you drink whiskey straight up? You a traveler. I'll do a little bit of whiskey on the rocks. Get some ice. Yeah, we can get you some ice. I feel like mature Lewis. Wow.

So then Lewis Scott I was already a master podcaster at this time. He literally had a record of this big and you'd go to his house And be three guys around it and you'd have to talk into it nice and Then Lewis I brought Lewis on because they were all friends, right? I was in friends with Lewis until six months I Lewis and You and I had him on it, you know what, dude? Yes. And then he started coming back.

Yes. But I remember my second time doing the show. Yes. Lewis was supposed to be on and then you just blew it off and it blew my mind. Shut up, my tech, I'm a future legend. It blew my mind. That Lewis was no, because I thought this was like a big deal. I was like, this is the biggest thing I've ever done.

It was at that time. I was then like opening for Dane and it was fun to watch but then Lewis just no called no show And I was like what a fucking reason he's never gonna make it. I did I Tell you kind of Come down most should honestly You are those 20 minority report It's funny because if you go back and listen to enough you know what dudes you can hear Lewis come up with Real-ass dude

Yeah, come in wearing some What's funny about it wasn't a rattle at first? Out of container the whole thing was it you call me the fucking rattlesnake and then I just went I had outwards Yeah, and then you came in with a rattlesnake. Where is it? It's in one of the, oh, I can find it. And then Kelly Fistuka was here and what? Was great is Lewis would use all that shit to bait her

into getting a set. Kelly was here and Scopeau question came in. How did you get Kevin Bacon from 1990 to show up? Yeah. That was close. I would say you got to say you got to be found. I would have said. I would have said. I would say you'll be found. I'm a guy with a loan. Why would you say we got a guy from 50?

It looks like white Benicio del Toro. Give me the keys and we'll have a crock. What a thought. You see, from heroes, Siler, no, he looks like the guy from Fright Night, the kid that turned into a, the kid from Fright Night, who turned into a vampire. And the winner is White Benicio Del Toro. He looks like, oh Jimmy Fallon.

Jimmy Fallon. He looks like my daughter's fiance. Hold on. Hello, dude. I love that Rich is busting out glasses to look at his phone forever. Bring up the kid from Fright Night. How would you love?

I've said it twice. I said I love things twice. Oh my God, can we get it back on track? Okay. So anyways, I've loved things twice. Oh my gosh, we can't back contract. Okay. So anyways, then we had him on. I came on, then the show became great. Then the show was the regs. These are the regs, Voss.

Did you just put him on his phone? I'm looking for a big one. Let's go take fucking hours. Go ahead, I'm listening. I can hear you. I didn't want him looking for a picture. Voss was gonna be our, what a broadened grandpad as my gift.

Bob Danna! Grandpa's a boo! Passing it over. What is grand, our what abroad in Grand Pad as my as my gift? Bob Dana What is grand so was it? That's a good Grand Pad is a good call. That one's good. That's Friday night. Look at that. I mean, I nailed that That was good. I fucking nailed that. It was good. Yeah, you know now now here's the thing Type in his name now and you'll see what he does you know I was not about you called change. You just say Let's move on. What's wrong with you gifts? All right

Now type of men now now type of men. No, no type is name in the same gun. Okay notes Gay porn typing gay porn after him. No, yeah, do he is had you find this Yeah, do he is had you find this Sick He's yelling out of a truck that's going by all the time Everything is a fucking die-fang That was Aaron Burr. So I'm watching TV when that and the guys, they give it one to what happened to blah, blah, blah for Friday night, and now they show him just pull up on Rollas Gates

and just fucking bend over and go, come on. And he went into Gay Pointy, had a great career as a Gay Point guy. For a long time. You dive into the end of it. No, you'd not. That's here almost all of them. Jesus Christ. Almost all of them.

Look at him. That was fun. The fucking great joke right right there one of the best, but yeah What happened was I did the pod once everyone was like Joe's amazing then I wasn't on there Like we're never listening again if you don't put Joe that we have these are cats. He came on all the time Yeah, yeah They were like meets the fucking sniper. He was okay You're gonna take you to fucking LA with him. What are you he was your mentor? He was your mentor. Yeah, I fucking made you stay I know remember that a week. That's where you we blame you

I fucked up. I should have let him go. He just be a Mexican out in LA right now How are they see this? This is the whole family act. You're also a fucking nut-sac on your head. I can't stop looking at it. The least Navi does. Mexican. So that's how it started.

When we all say, Yannis was like, I got to the last. It says Yannis six times and no one gave me anything. He was like, Yannis is a big part. That's almost like like, you also a big part. You also a big part. No, you're not the one. That's almost like him. He's a big fart. It's better. It's like, I love this.

He's the truth. He's the fucking truth. But anyways, the point is, Rich, you were never here. Ever. Yes. You know, why do you need to do it? I didn't need to do it. I'm not sure you do.

No. I'm part of this network. That's why I'm here. Ooh. Yeah, he has a big show on the network. We went solo. We're on our own. Yeah, now that we're on mine You want to see my paycheck dog?

My dog's like double digits Who is that wait? Don't you do a podcast with Mark Norman? Yeah, we get a lot of chipotle gift cards I actually I actually have a Fucking horrible is that pocket. I mean him and Mark. What could they possibly talk about that would be interesting if you think about it I'm just asking I agree rich Rich really does with a whitish I mean Voice

Because Lewis is here. It's great. No the Bobby's got flavor You look like you report to a probation officer I thought of that job, dude, but it was me so I didn't do That's all right his ring stink I don't like the shirt though. I don't like you Bobby's fucking wig I don't know what it is white looks like you have long gray hair coming down It's fucking me up your wizard wig I know why you look like this long gray hair coming down I Should kind of

We hate Joe People get malered to film my joke, but so it was like I don't know why it looks like you have white hair flowing down Joe, I'm saying is because you fucking do That was a dumb comment. I don't have to win again I think it hurt that you said gray and it's actually white I feel like all right just fit Bobby's the problem Keep on fucking defending it. Just let it die. I think you guys are picking on me. I don't like it.

You picked up for us. I didn't get it. Because he's not supposed to be here. I'm not picking up. I'm just pointing out that he's not supposed to be here. That's right. I'm here though. I'll live with it.

Who did that last year? I know that pig horrible here. Who was here last year? Tell me it wasn't here last year. Did you just bump someone out in Australia? Wasn't there another comic here last year that wasn't supposed to be here? Kelly's dead lifting now. Gabby and me. Did you know that? Kelly's dead lifting. She's coming

for an event. She's fucking she's doing something. Kelly Fistuke is dead lifting. I wish she was just dead. I hope Kelly gives you a Christmas story beating. Where she gets on you. So, when you said, Kelly Fistuke is dead, I was like, yes! Oh, I'm going to punch you, Lewis! That'd be great. If she became a ghost, then, how did you get the amazing, by the way?

She was hot. Yeah. That's what we met. Let me say, hold on. She's deadlifts on her minute. She's going to answer. She's not a a minute stop. Yeah, just go to answer Why would you she's not a deadlifting champion? Why would you Google Kelly for sugar deadlifting? She's not famous She's not a fucking deadlifting person Mike doesn't do this anymore. No Mike does that and he's better

Regular Mike Mike sticks over there. Yeah Mike 2.0 sits there. He's fucking amazing My biggest Mike 2.0 holy shit That's Mike amazing. I think his mic 2.0 holy shit. No that's mic 10.0. Mike no points. Oh she's dead left. Oh point is round. Oh you're right.

You could have quit with your right. Give me that bomb down. There it is. Fucking show. Show you what he's got coming for. She got tattoos in her arms. She looks amazing. That's not her.

That's her. Look at her. Look at her chubby arms. You think that's hot? No one said she's just gonna see this. I think it looks great. Kelly, I'm happy for her. She's coming for Lewis. Hey, those are fun.

And Kang. Wait, look at her panic. Look at her panic right at the end though. Ready watch this. Look at the chicken. Behind her, smoke. Watch this, watch your panic. Ready watch, look at her panic.

Right there. I'm hungry. Oh man, can we have lunch? I'm gonna pay for Kelly's ticket to come back and fight Lewis and Alice maybe next year. I'm made. Kelly's coming for your belt. I'm gonna bring her out like fucking drag of the game. Just keep on pulling it over and over again. That's very, very subtle. I hope she does get back and just sits on Lewis's chest. Buffy.

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I go Lewis, let me introduce your opponent. I'm coming by you, Lewis!, let me introduce your opponent. I got it, my alias. There's 310 pounds right there. That's a lot of weight. No, she's like 260, I'd say. That's creatures. That's real.

That's real. That's real. That's real. Come on. That's real. Guys. I'll give you a golf car. That was the best he joke he's ever done on this podcast.

That is a fucking award win. he took you coming home, buddy I The thing we used to say to right yeah, Dan Did you still fucking do a voice and he goes me and she fat Kelly for stew He would come in every time you don't have to put the word fat in there We get it back then she wasn't fat. No, she was cute. She got skinny in fuck there. She was cute You fucker look at me look you come Dan did you come Dan? Where'd you come? Got it. You want one stuff? Honored, it is shoulder.

In between, fold six and fold seven. He got a little bit of a cord there. Hit me too. Stop it. Hit me too, I got caught. Let me tell you. He was skinny when I knew it. She had an ass, an bum problem.

She had a fisher. A white fisher. An anal fisher. An anal fisher and she couldn't eat. What's an anal fisher? It's like a vein that pops in your asshole. I can't say. A white shirt a fish or an anal fish and she couldn't eat what's an anal fish? Like a vein that pops in your asshole. Oh, I don't know. It's like okay. I believe But she had a problem. She lost a lot of weight. She looked great and then slowly but surely

Me and her both got fat at the same time, which is sad I don't think you're fat. I think you're big-bonded Bondin okay, give me the thing bombanna. Oh Here you yeah, I can't have that much I was like You see something so horrific. They're like I guess yeah, but it's you just cover your shirt with it That what's wrong with you why you off? I'm not cuz I'm not cuz I'm not supposed to be here so I'm just you're supposed to be You let him put you on till

Sometimes sometimes Go ahead Rich and Joe look like Sometimes go ahead Be in here I'm not thrilled about everyone else over here being here I'm not happy about them either Just for beginning Joe's joke He was able to win send the opian Anthony years. Yes, Patrisso I was able to win San the Opie in Anthony years. Yes, Patrisso Jim and Sam the whole fucking

How like chocolate all of a sudden just started getting knocked out super easy I lost my chin too What you didn't even get that joke I just scream something I'm saying boss what listen you're off. Okay, so what's happening I'm saving the for-end, the knockout, bitch. All right, don't get me. I was saying that to everybody here. I think once we see the game, we'll see.

Don't get mad at a cool Santa, who is long hair. Thanks. It looks like you have long hair. I can't figure it out. I'm fucking sorry. I'm just like, Jesus come on, dude. Doesn't it kind of like Bobby has glasses on

Just like Joe this fucking murdering I don't like he bombed so much in the beginning is making it up I don't like evil elf Joe list coming after everybody by the way in the room doesn't even matter Bombed in the room, but at home they're rolling in the aisles at that. I can't remember what I said it was something The condom thing. There's that was terrible Bond in the room, but at home they're rolling in the aisles at that. I can't remember what I said. It was something. The condom thing. There's that was terrible. Yeah, but it's not like getting that something like dick is.

Nobody can see it, but turn the camera off of my face. On his. Oh, turn it off. Lewis is. All right. So anyways, we've been doing this for a long time. And then without you, without you, thank God, Joe. And by the way, we all knew you were there.

We can have invited you. We you invited. Stop God. Joe. And by the way, we all knew you were there. We could have invited you. We invited. Stop it. Go. Oh, he's trying the language. I know, okay, okay, okay. You hear that engine? I just don't want to be the one who cracks.

We're like, oh, fuck. He's going to start pushing it down the hill for us and then jump in and then we'll see you going It's fine. I'll take it. I you know, I forget what these silences are like and then you come back on the show Take it and ask who's been back in the living room to grow up in Oh, there it is. The thing is y'all like you push it down hill. That's what the hill is for. Oh buddy Wow, he's coming after Joe's going pure technique Wow, he's coming after Joe's going pure technique. Yeah, I'm gonna help everybody. Because when you say that what you're reflecting is

Hey, you need to learn how to pop and get out. I did. Keep it in tomorrow. You'll take the bomb, Dana. Uh-huh. All right. So that anyways, Joe came in one year. When we're all coming in, he said we should do a Yankee swap.

I just asked you this dumb shit. No, this is the Yankee Swap. I just asked you this dumb shit. I just asked you this dumb shit. No, this is the Yankee Swap. I just asked you this dumb shit. No, this is the Yankee Swap. I just asked you this dumb shit. No, this is the Yankee Swap. I just asked you this dumb shit. No, this is the Yankee Swap. I just asked you this dumb shit. No, this is the Yankee Swap. I just asked you this dumb shit. No, this is the Yankee Swap. I just asked you this dumb shit. No, this is the Yankee Swap. I just asked you this dumb shit. No, this is the Yankee Swap. I just asked you this dumb shit. No, this is the Yankee Swap. I just asked you this dumb shit. No, this is the Yankee Swap. I just asked you this dumb shit. No, this is the Yankee Swap. I just asked you this dumb shit. No, this is the Yankee Swap. I just asked you this dumb shit. I just asked you this dumb shit. I just asked you this dumb shit. No, this is the Yankee Swap. I just asked you this dumb shit. I just asked you this dumb shit. I just asked you this dumb shit. I just asked you this dumb shit. I just asked you this dumb shit. I just asked you this dumb shit. No, this is the Yankee Swap't look to it show throws a shit. No, it always sucks

Well, no, it never goes way. It's never yes. Yes, oh Let's open with it Skip I say move it to the back order maybe we move it to the back order maybe we said it's out with the old and with the news out what we're doing in the kitchen rich you're clearly the step down in the situation okay I don't mind somebody step right I can lead huh what I someone said I was to know in the new and he said the Jew and with the Jew that was a good line yeah you'd be gone are we acting like every line gets off in this podcast? I know fucking everyone steps all over everybody I'm not quoting I'm not quoting plan words were quote quoting clever stuff

I You know I've seen him go in front of 12,000 crazy fans and Billy fucking it didn't this is worse Little mouth fuck them up not not at all not at all this got in there. I use scared of people with little mouth Is that what's wrong? Yes, the show the resamount It's what's scared of me. It's just, it's just, it's just. Don't let the resam out. That's what's fucking killing me. I've never seen him like this.

Ever in my life have I seen him like this. Ever. You're all. I just just calm, I'm relaxed, because I don't want to come in here. What? Funny? That's a lie.

Why should I be the only one? All right. So anyways, we're going to do the Yankee Schwap. You want to do that first? And you want to do the Rose-Forn thing. Do the Rose- the Yankee swap you want to do that first and you want to do the most foreign thing Do the most of what we're gonna do it do it first cuz that's in the climax to get sucked I forget it out of the way how did it go nobody knows Rose highlight of the year Thorin low light of the year this game Thing that happened that that's the C that's been playing that you're looking forward to. Not doing this

next year. See what getting jokes. I set him up. Lewis kind of knocks him a little bit and a waiver. And hopefully someone else will knock him down. Lewis why don't you go first. Your fight is your fucking room. I'll do it. I'll do it for everybody. Lewis is his rose. His I'll but I do it for everybody

Lewis is his rose his roses is dumb fucking fight If he's gonna say it let him say it over fucking comedy special week here you dickhead. Yeah, that's your thorn That's everybody's I think that's your rose the fight probably you went in to fight and these guys are superheroes that speech was embarrassing You don't think that's where I wait wait wait What's it gave the speech in the ring and they were trying to get the mic He gave it he gave it if you can change We didn't watch the speech You know We didn't watch the speech Yeah, they're fighting for the mic You don't think it's for that twice by your way. It was like Veter's wedding. They're trying to get the microphone You don't think his special day

Self is is up there. You don't think that's up there. No, I think that's a weird. That's the seed That's the seed that is my seed that I'm nailing it and you're soaring Well, you have oh boy. How many people down though the special? Voss talks some shit about Tuesdays with stories and I think it unleashed a monster You're gonna oh pot. Yeah, you got a podcast with Mark Norman. I watch this and now Joe's just in a fucking water tower You got a podcast with Martin Norman and now Joe's just in a fucking water tower Just take it in the podcast any good. Oh, yeah, you don't think his podcast is I've never heard it. I can't imagine what's the name Very Johnny and very popular very popular a lot of two's the young folks. All right, so you're I'm gonna think of your thorn your thorn

Babies fine. You got a nice relationship. You might not even have a thorn. Maybe your thorn is probably bombed somewhere, a bunch. This is why he needs to do it, because he knows his thorn. I got you. What's your thorn? What is the thorn? What is the thorn again? The thing that I... That's the low light. The thorn.

The little light of my ear, the prick me for my ear. Yeah, and it can't be this. It can't be this. It can't be this. It can't be, but just don't say it. Just be nice. My thorn for the years. Yes. I don't be a handy, but just don't say it just be nice. Oh my thorn for the years Yes, that I

Didn't really have yet. I already do pitch on you. That was that yeah, that's not nice You didn't throw piss on me. I threw piss on him. That was actually my That was the year before No, no, you threw piss on Zach. I was no pissed on Every time I look at already laying his nose. That's my thorn a piston every time I look at Arty Wang's nose, that's my thorn. What have you seen it? I love Arty, but it's a guy damn, he knows he knows.

He knows. He actually got his eyes. Yeah, we're all guys. Those are the areas. Now they had Arty hang on the thing and he made a thing about us. He said he knows. Yeah, that was a good. Um, you made a speech. You, do I fly one the UV victory? I get the speech up somehow. Yeah, I'm For a while right here

There it is right there. Yeah, fuck him There is a moment where he tries there it is. Oh, you know, I see a lot of things here tonight. Let me see You know like me. I'm like you as much I've seen a lot of things here tonight. Let me see. Ready? Okay. Adrian! You don't like me? I don't like you as much. So, my would go along. If you could like me, and I could like you. If you could download my podcast, I can download yours.

We can all download podcasts. I'm fucking fracked. I'm fracked. That's great. Of what these guys do. This is me trying to ask your girls, she's okay after we fuck. Are you okay? That was fun, right?

You're healthy. You're healthy. I'm sorry I'm sweating up your eyes. I'm sorry I tripped all over you. Oh sorry, I can see that you're clearly not turned on and uncomfortable. Oh god, you were pretty mad I came that fast, huh? Okay. Thanks here. God, things vary, I see I came that fast, huh? Things here.

Cockings. Very I see Keith. You already in the crowd. I see him. These are fucking superhero. We know. We know the heart. It's fucking. It was times you watch us. I made you turn me on. All right.

Give me going. That's great. That belt's awesome. I can shape at lazy. Fuck's go to an M.M.A. Jim Walk one month. Wait, wait. Now this is Vita's wedding speech We watch this He was breathing the same way during the best man speech the thing you don't know about comedians We're in the trenches every day. It's like brothers

Best man speech without knowing the bride's name The bride was like this is this I is this joke? Gary and his nice lady are gonna go real far in this world Gary Time to meet a good girl Jessica Kirchons really funny Rosanna the 80s for a minute Why walk why walk in the issues for a month? Why on the I was time I just bought the horse quite a mile This is still a minute to go here in the issues for a month. Why on the I was telling you that I just bought the whole squad of my life. This is still a minute to go here.

I want you to choose if you have not done up before because these are fucking super heroes. I want to tell you right now. We look at his guy. Get the mic. Look at look at. He was like, you don't have to need a song. You're an untarming rock.

That's what happened to him. What's his name? A match at the college. Yeah. Same shirt. You can't make those jokes. No, you can't. He's like, you know, superheroes.

That'll be really great. And you're the winner of the picture. You go more radicals, everybody. Louis, Jacob, Mr. Winner. Yeah, you did great. Go to the market. Go to the market., you dig great. Go to the market for the market. Hey man! Oh, that's one.

Look at that. Smoke time's up, baby. It goes up. You look like a big, expensive ball. How many they put a hubcap on a Puerto Rican? Dude, I'm so glad to have that. Boss is back. Boss is back.

Boss is back. Boss is finally! Woo! Guy, let me answer. It's funny, who's in the house right now. Anybody want a smoke, Tony had our t-shirt? Whoa, she's in the house. Blue is your son. Oh, someone hang on a second.

Blue is like a shitty middle-air in the ring. I got these shirts. Thank you, I know. Do you guys like that last punch? I'll be selling shirts. Ha-ha-ha. That wing club, my coach is Diego San Diego Lopez. Thank you, I know you guys like that last punch. I'll be selling shirts My coaches Diego said big ol' Lopez Michael best big Justin Selver. Thank you. One more time. Hello, it's everybody Hey, one more time for that. That was the most hentiklomagnic

How many people were there 2500 no fucking way hard rock's what I got hard work with on cuz I'm gonna holy fuck we watched it you saw it You saw come out to the crowd. No, I wasn't there stupid. Oh, you're old married couple I saw him I saw you Commented a wow there's a lot that's actually so I asked how many people were there. Yeah, but you surprised at 2500 Why would you be surprised as far as a big theater what i'm just saying twenty five hundred he's never had those numbers the animal last week at a special how many five hundred where uh... the garden in the uh...

uh... so that i pretend to be out of town where would you do special uh... cutting room. The cutting room. How many people? How many people? How many? 180 people. That's good. That's a good crowd for a special. And what do you call, dude? Warm up? Just. I don't care. Justin Silva? That's great. Silver. Silver. What do I say? Silver? What's the difference an R? Perfect for you had are we done with rose That elf has a regular size mouth

You want to leave no,'ve said this four sort of. Oh, so what? You're the only one that gets a rose seed. And this rose thorn seed game is where you don't like the rose thorn. It is the church of our Christmas. Let's go ahead. Let's go ahead. Let's go ahead.

It's like a challenge. It's the thing where you go to if you go. You want to get out here early? What are you looking at? You watch for. You got nowhere to go. Good point. All right, let's do a good rose thorn me.

Oh, your rose was your son born this year? No. No. No. No. You are. All right, let's start easy. Obviously, for the Lord, he lost a family member.

That's hard. That's the thorn easy. Rose. Did you, oh, the theory, what was that? He lost a family member. That's hard. That's the thorn easy rose The very woman's that that was a while ago, right? All right, I'm gonna say well you had you had a big year you had comics come home He's done that every year for like the last But this year you closed it out. I can last year in it last year and the year before. You got a new web series shed thing. Yeah.

That's me or Rose something. Who's more? You're a shed. You're a carnation, you're a shed web series. You're more, that'd be more like a carnation. I know Rose. I know Rose. Maybe a cookie.

I know Rose, bushcraft party boys. We went out, big success, it was great. That was fun. That was something That's not a rose what's the next one and then seed looking forward to next year. Yeah, he probably won't be here Yeah, I hate this game. I hate this game What you see you do you see it, huh? What's your seat? I'm not doing my seed Why not what my new seed? What's the thing you did did this year that's gonna really set things up for next year Well, I'm gonna probably shoot a special this year

Yeah, you're cutting your own you're gonna have Louis Gomez presents Robert Kelly Cutting Kelly Yeah, go go the presents now. No, we got to do your rose to thorn my rose You can't do your ship with you gentlemen, and you have all fucking roses What's thorn you have for you? You have the thorns would you dump another hot chicken get another hot chicken replace it? Stop it. No, she didn't let her. We be.

I did. We're friends. We're friends forever. I never. I'm not. We still mess around if we see each other. That's really just essential. You know, you don't have to let the horn.

You have no thorns. Uh, yeah. I mean, my mom got a car accident this year. That's what she. Okay. Yeah. What happened? She got a dude died behind the wheel and then blew through a light and tea boulder But what happened to her then what happened she walked away like the T800?

My mom's a terminator The job is the most thing that happened Was your house almost burned? Yeah, my grandma had to evacuate because of the fires She walked through the fire so she's also like a terminator. She actually flew above on the storm Yeah, and then you took all your millions and bought her a brand new house. Million no, it's called billions Oh, so billions billions Baseball season four coming soon Millions that's the seed season four. We're filming season four a billion season four. Great. That's awesome

And you're still in it. Yeah, that's good still I just look at that show We're looking at the worst look of ever that shows a scary show. Yeah and you're still in it. Yeah, that's good still Because that show is scary show Yeah, you get fucking I worry about it every episode episode. All right cool. I pray for you to die I'm on the reddit for the billions reddit Lewis I'm gonna need to talk to you away from these microphones because what you're saying right now is hurting me Those loses the only friend that wants you to fail? Let's go do two two Boss is good. All right boss. What is bosses?

I don't know what he does well first of all I'm not part of this part. No, you are part of you You're not part of it. I'm part of it. You're part of it. You're part of it. He's rich boss Thank you. No, you know what my seat? Having rich here for next year's Christmas special. Mmm. That was really sweet. That was nice of him. I don't like it though. Uh, what is it?

What is it? What is his thorn? What is his thorn? Mmm. See, I don't, we don't, we don't chat that much. Yeah, I don't know him like that. What's your thorn? My thorn?

Yeah, what happened to you this year that was bad? Uh, this year that was bad. You're that was bad your tour list. I am God I React like he was on his phone I don't like that fucking 13 year old Letty old He stole that from a kid you know it took death from a kid that's from a kid. You know he took that from a kid. That's from a show. You got a poem.

Danny, do you want Fortnite? Danny, that's from a show. He's playing online video games. All he's doing is fucking shit. I guarantee you, that's on a movie. That's on a Disney movie. No, Lewis is like, I said, that's one of those like an eight-year-old talk shit

to me on Fortnite. And he was like, yeah, that's why I'm going to fuck your girlfriend. He's like, I'm a kink because he was friends with Kim first. Yeah. So then I found out that his dad is mom were divorced and I was like, I thought we're like busing balls. So the kids are dead left because you can stand being around you.

And the kid literally got silent and then disconnected. Oh, and I've never talked to this kid again. What? Lewis fucking, don't come after him online. What's up, dude, I get it. What the, send that kid away, game. Don't come come at me bitch. Yeah, don't step to a real ass dude. Let's want to realize the answer

Yeah, what? I put it on the coaster. I so what did you thorn? Probably this year Anxiety my anxiety was my thorn really yeah, it's not your thorn every year now this year was I didn't like it It was really bad. Yeah, okay. What's your that was throwing last year was it yeah better this year? What's your rose? Well, I mean oh I bought a my own couch bed to sleep downstairs That's Bonnie's That's all three

That's a weird one. No, I shot an hour this year that that could be I know that was good too Yeah, that looks good. All right, so you don't I have three things? Seed my seed Jesus Christ. Sorry. I'm not used to this. I've never been here. Yeah, so excited Yeah, we know we know ants boyfriend What he's I had to learn to see ants boyfriend when's boyfriend is there for up for the holidays You don't know him. He's not really a relative I think I'm an aunt the comedian. Yeah, I think

I think why would I make a reference to Listen, I fucked it up. Well the word is aunt. I fucking know. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no in there. No, no one sees and Bobby. What do you say? I say? For Massachusetts. Yeah, we fucking right where the country started Yeah, where the pilgrims live. Yeah, we had the first idea they stopped before They got there. Fuck it. Whatever we we showed up I would see everybody what's that? What's for next year? Yeah, looking forward to looking forward what am I looking What's the scene? For next year? Yeah. Looking forward to, looking forward to. What am I looking forward to buying a new house next year?

You're gonna move out of the townhouse and get a house house? No, I might either get a three bedroom townhouse or a house house. Why don't you get a house house? Because I don't want to deal with it. That's why, that's what's good about Kondo. We have people like Lewis to do all the yard. You know what I mean? Really?

Really? Is that real- ask yard workers. You know what I mean? I think you mean Luis. So, you know, and there's a pool that we don't have to fuck. Yeah, I know what I'm saying. We are attached to somebody else's wall.

It doesn't matter. What the fuck can he hear you? Oh, cares. I do. You can't play drums. You can't fucking. I don't play drums. We do scream. I hear you cares I do you can't you can't play drums you can't fuck I don't play drums We do scream. I like what you can't scream. Are you not? Reasoned by yourself. You go you can't he can't he super late not all this don't fight with girls

Some guys fight with their their girls. Yeah, don't go who just walk away and never talk. Yeah, that's not true at all I give a sense we make life one more time. The central release back into the wild. We do a tantric thing, it's very erotic. House just aren't too much of a headache. But I saw a beautiful one. I'm gonna show to you? No, no.

No, but I will see it later, because I almost moved this week. I almost bought a house in South Salem, up by Versey, on a lake, fucking beautiful house. I still might get it. I still might get it. Wait, so you're? That fucking extra half hour were verzy lives,

cause I had a call verzy, but verzy doesn't work in New York really, so. What are you talking about? He doesn't come down as much as this. I don't want to have, I just convinced Bobby that verzy owned like 10 Taco Bell franchise We're in the road one time and I was like yeah, but first on a full-time comic He wants to talk about franchise

I mean And then I would tell to somebody confidently where I go you know, Vers really beautiful. I thought you were gonna be beautiful. That's something you could convince me of easily, right? And then I would tell to somebody confidently, where I go, you know, Versions, I tend to talk about. Well, also, why would the food fucking lies about that? And I would be like, okay, sure. It's not like a thing where I'm like, what? It's not like I was yawning. I mean, it's crazy, but it's also, I would just go, oh, wow, that's not.

It was just a little lie for fun for me, I don't know why. Yeah. You don't just tell absolute, complete fabrication, sometimes just. Yeah, it's just like that. It's like that specific, you're like 10 Francesca Bells and puppies driving all like this. It's a lot of work. But, you know. I want to tackle Bell now.

Worth it. Worth it. I bet the returns are pretty good after three months then he's got a big house the big guy explains What's his wife do Okay, let's go move on Questions you've done that twice you've asked the question I don't think I told about it didn't really care twice as far as This forces me a bit. It's like, hey, I'll wait for you from. Who gives a fuck? Let's go. Yeah.

Hey, what do you want to do? I don't care. Let's go. That's what I do. That's bad crowd work, God. What do you got, Joe? What's your store and and the store was listening to Nate Bargazze's expectations of what happens when you do Netflix the stand-ups. He's like, I mean, you're gonna be I sell out. I make 25 grand a you're gonna just buy a house now That way you don't have to worry about it and then I added a hundred Nadea

He tried to get loose to go to LA so tried to sell him on that. I mean imagine that I moved to Tennessee a year later. You know, you know, even fucked. Yeah, I would have been fucked in LA by yourself bad person And then he Has met him twice He comes to the city he'll stay in Midtown just like literally like a rich aunt Thank you Come by the hotel maybe I'll come down and touch the child That's one of his bits I'm just a bit deadbeat God, man. That's his, here's your sign. I mean, so that was definitely disappointing.

And then I could tell too, because I called Soda, because he did the stand-up steal, and I'm like, hey, so this is crazy, how you fucking blow up? And Dan's like, yeah, yeah, I mean, yeah, this is a bump. Like, I got a bump. But I've never been like, that sounds different than what Nate said. But I was like, maybe he's being humble. The world is. Nate calling me and being like, this is crazy, right? I got a bomb. That sounds different than what Nate said. I was like, maybe he's being humble.

The one that's made calling me and being like, this is crazy, right? And I'm like, yeah. Why the fuck am I not? Why did he blow up? He's like, he's like, I'm getting blown by three Dominican women right now. Yeah, I mean, I'm just swimming in a pool of money like Scrooge McDuck. We're the same agent. on my agent was like,

yeah, you know, he's episode one, you're episode six. He's like, people read chapter one of the book. He's a killer here a lot. He's still clean. Chris do clean. And he's also done like tonight, 20 tonight shows, and he's stopped one second too. He pays around $2,500 to $3,000 a month

for an ad agency publicist to promote him. So if you pay that, I've figured this out. I make that. A lot of people. A lot of people. A lot of people. A lot of people.

If I hustle. If you look, a lot of people that made it higher to publicist for around three grand a month and they kept them on for a couple years and they get you in everything They get you in everything and they get you in the door and they get all this press for you and they get you shit And now with Nate's little videos he puts out he's popping if you did that show you'd have the same thing But I also think it's I mean it was now Nate was the native super fun No that's who I'm saying he's not funny but I'm saying was now Nate was the native super fun

But I'm saying why but Seen screws I know a guy that'll teach you how to sell CDs out of your shoes. I just got to do his Boost-Chief Facebook posts. Just do that. Put too many words in the thing. I stomp that. Go ahead. Yeah, I mean Nate's excitement, I think it was because that is the thing that moved Nate ahead. So he's like, oh, I'll move everybody in the head.

I'll hold it all. Also, guys, what you guys are failing to recognize? It's a combination of all those things. Exactly. Nate is the only person here who represents middle America who represents everybody around this fucking country. You guys.

No, we say racial slurs all the time. Absolutely. No, I'm saying that people, this is why Roseanne got so big, before that should happen, it was like people saw, they're not represented. That side of it, it should, it's not an offend anybody but he's hilarious. You fucking hold if you watch his bits, they're fucking hilarious and they

don't offend you. Everybody can watch them at work. No, I'm up loud. That is not his concern. Yeah, you can't, I mean look, it's, look, clean as money. But it was funny to watch. Just a fact, cleaning you out of more money you make. Well, that's what Gary Gummer, when he met Leno, he's in the middle of the commercial, he's like, I really, I'm clean because he's- But it's not just any clean city of the house.

And he goes like this, he goes, I'm clean for the money, I don't give a fuck about that. Who said that, right? Leno said, you make more fucking money, Cleanser. Get out of my fist, Kike. Oh, yeah, that was rough. Jesus. But it? Leno said I, you make more fucking money. Yeah, so get out of my face, Kike. Oh, no, that was rough. Jesus. But it's funny to know Nate.

I didn't have it. I'm gonna Kike now. Oh, that's Leno's not even. Oh, okay, go ahead. He said that. No, Leno said. Leno said that. I love that I'm gonna tell Vos that Leno really didn't say that. Hey, what's the guy?

That's a guy who lied about Taco Bell. No, go ahead. What it will show? All right, so you're thorn. I didn't say that What it was so are you so you're thorn that's the one Taking for it. Yeah, that's it. We're stopping with jokes. There's a lot of jokes you fucking gifts right now mustache stinks. Yeah, what's the milk gun at the catalytic off? This is great. I think thread off. This is great. I think threat was stopping's really handsome He's gonna help out with the the network He's a comic film you can take some photos for Bobby. He's a comic. He does a bunch of stuff. No, I'm my back. Oh That's a rip-ass you back I'm sorry. I have a hernia the disc

Next album that's a good fucking name a disc. Oh, there we go. That's his next album. That's a good fucking name. I'm gonna disc, but it's not really a disc. I watch your seed. My seed is all over my stomach. Show him. Is that for me? What you see?

No, that's not your left. He's snuck, he's snuck him a laugh. Yeah, that's not going to work. You have to watch it. I have to get a little kiss. No, laugh it out. My seed is what my marriage is just going to Rific. You know, my wife and I were getting along.

Lewis's seed is not wanted by Nate Bergazzi. Wow. There we go. Why would I say that? Why would I say it? See, why? I've never seen you like this. What happened?

I've seen him like this quite a bit. I've never seen him. Oh, James. Boss is going to rattle you. Oh, I'm just saying James is on top. what happened? I've seen him like this quite a bit. I've never seen him. Oh, James, he's gonna rattle you. Oh, I'm just saying you always on top. You always fucking, never on top. I've murdered people. I have, listen, the scene, it didn't know,

because his Nate, okay. I love you, let's just see. Give it one. I would Nate won his C's. I love you, dude. I love you, dude. I love you, dude. I love you, dude.

I love you, dude. I love you, dude. Whatever Lewis just ate, he's so fucking basted right now. I'm feeling good. Yeah, good. What you see? I'm sorry. I already said my wife. I was a great relationship. You're seated your wife I put a wife of seven years We've been married for a year. She been with her. What's that raise? It's outside

That's like a video. What is that? Oh Everybody should check their phone turn that turn that whose phone is that my shine airplane mode who's fucking phone is it Show me and my rose maybe you guys saw this Maybe you heard about it little thing called Standing oh the tonight show Everybody gets one Everybody got him I got one Bonnie. I got one. I didn't show it on air. I got one. Bonnie. I got one.

They didn't show it on air. I didn't see it. I got it when I came out. Oh, that doesn't count. They didn't like me by the end. They were trying to stand up to make room for you to get in the room. That wasn't bad. Not bad.

Not bad. Not bad. You see no adults. No adults. Try to get running class. He's practicing in the mirror. They're making room for you. Come on.

All right, so we're done with it, right? No, back in the go, but I can go. You know, we can't. No, no, no, no. I was making my crazy. I swear to God, if you pull them into this game, I will. God, I can't. I can't do it.

I got an eye headache. So much comedy came from this. The game, you see? The game is just the through one. You want an apple? What? It's made a horrible joke. I got an eye headache so much comedy came from this the game Apple what's me the horrible joke? What did you say? I had a guy said is that by apple? You should do more puns I don't know if Let's put it a second. I don't I think I like that That's good you don't like I have an headache and he goes, is that my apple?

You get it? He was full. If he was more confident and faster, and he wanted to fuck up. There was a beat on him. Let's try it one more time. I'm going to say it again. Do it better than way.

Just try. Say it again. So dude, I had an eye headache. Samsung. What? Anyways, what are you on about? My back. All right, so here we go. What? Oh, anyways, what are you on about my back? All right, so here we go.

Apple's making products, ladies products now, for when they have their period, the iPad. I don't like Tony more. Yeah. That's my thorn. Maybe 4,000 on the publicist. This is why. All right, let's get to the gifts, guys.

All right, let's get to the gifts guys In a hat numbers in a hat numbers in a hat better than numbers in a hat numbers in a hat because they'll come out you can see it's we're gonna start the thing oh it's fine everyone be cool you guys didn't do the numbers one two three four five six are you seven a Zack eight thank you bro oh yeah right night brought one right night night not night, the video game made by EA Sports, which is a lot of fun. One of my favorite free entrances.

There's 10 of us. Right now it was a great movie. I didn't take it. No, fight night. I love EA Sports Boxing. Great show. It was a video. Awesome video game.

What are we doing? This is dead air. Come on, keep a cook it. Lewis, you suck. Are you fucking watching? So are you gonna big head? I'm gonna watch you? I'm sorry. Are you watching Escape from wherever they were?

Are you chewing on trees? Is that a cinnamon stick? What the fuck are you chewing on? What are you chewing on? This is your original toothbrush. This is what your making's use to brush your... So when you don't want to smoke or whatever. You've never seen these?

I saw this thing to a dumb guy. Back to him, drawlies. He's the fuck good to end on it. Whatever you never seen me I saw this thing to a dumb guy This guy look like a lumberjack fat oh I I'm gonna stick boss come down guys sold the two of the park Why there be a re re tied walking around buying trees from yeah Boy you can't say retard. I mean in a voice you can Voice law dude now Lewis will cheat what Lewis will cheat. That's my I brought that no, I'm not trying to be mean You're gonna cheat I got a peak. Can I pee? What dude you remember the last time we did this I was on I was coming off drugs and I pissed like 30 times

Yeah, yeah fucking eat up. Yeah, I was on I think it was Whatever whenever I'm in that gigantic disgusting pig animal porn star that you brought in here Then attacked me when I was on the show Did she die of age yet? No, she goes on Jim and Sam show a lot. She goes on Jim and Sam show a lot still No, she they would never have her own They're not really friends with her. Well, whatever it is. They have like a fucking piggy discussing porn star on there because I get How it's kind of funny to like have her there to mom that happened Joe Joe you call their hookers.

Yeah, I said, man. I said something, then she got mad at me. And then I was nervous. I don't like to hurt people's feelings because I care about people. And then I was out of like competition. And then you're a wonderful friend who just quintupled down.

She was like, what'd you call me? And then you were like, you fucking mad at me. And then when I said, I was like, oh, I mean, you sell sex for money? I mean, why? He's not being crazy. It's not a reach to say that you're a hooker. Yeah, Lewis actually bench appeared her about,

he was like, no, you're actually, this is what you do for work. And it was what I was like. But I wasn't being disrespectful. I was legitimately saying like, I was explaining your perspective. I was just saying like, why you would make this happen. And she just got fucking crazy ghetto. Got on my face and, yeah, that was that. I was like, hey why you would make this a bit and she just got fucking crazy ghetto got on my face and

Yeah, that was that video wasn't it? Yeah, it was a video. Yeah, it went viral. Okay now before we do this We have enough we have enough numbers in here correct because last year we didn't have enough numbers Am I right? Yeah, well, let's go to Mary Jean put herself in there Okay, so you're gonna have to go around should I pick first? No, you pick whatever you want you show. What do you think should I pick first? I'll pick first it's mine your show. So what what? I'm saying like I'll pick first all right. Keep it secret though. Everyone keep your number a secret Because that's part of the thing

Okay, Liz is on her way you want number one right? Yeah, yes number one's the best number 10 is the second Number two is the worst number. Fuck. There's a big white bag bag. Can I go again? No, we are not going again. Fucking Billy. Not going to say it after. All right, fucking mammoth. Did you put a line that's six or nine so we don't have a confusion? I read them differently. Okay. Which one's which? Chill now. All right. Don't chill. I need that back You're actually the holidays. I can see you're acting. I feel like you're upset season two acting This is season three acting, yeah, yeah, why did get freezing in here?

We we I don't know it's a fucking pre-war building feels like the door is a fucking kidding me. No way Lewis got to let's got one no No way Lewis got to Lewis got one no That's lives can we go away about it back? No Zack, Zack you got Zack how you got yours fuck this game about this fuck everyone Please don't have a present. I got a little present. You got a number. You got one didn't't you no? I got the worst number you can get would you two no? six six six Hey, yeah, I blow by who's next?

All right, who is number one? Don't show your number. Please. Don't show your number. Please number one. Who you got your number Becky She's not in it. This isn't in it. Yes, she is. Did you get a present? Yes, you did Your present is we got it enough. All right, Liz everybody Liz is here The second is here oh You only get what's from you did my show. Hey member Lewis when you did my show do you guys remember? Bobby don't open it Bobby do you remember the American rattlesnake the real nice dude? Yeah con volotea la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca. Spectacularismos, lincones de película y un sincindia aventuras desesperan. ¡Fliparás!

Vuelades de Madrid, Amurcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros. Volotea. Parifa sujetas a disponibilidad, consulta las condiciones en volotea.com. I told you we should bring rich in on this. All right, let's go. Who goes first? Who has number one? Number one. Number one. Number one. Louis, you got it, you fuck.

No, Becky. Fuck, Becky. That's fucking hard. She doesn't do anything. But are you mad? That's crazy. Her jumping up and down right now was enough. Becky, Becky.

Becky, I didn't see that. Jesus Christ. Her jumping up and down right now was enough Becky I didn't see that Jesus Christ Becky Can you get excited again? Oh my god, what's that? Gifts. I don't know. Listen, okay pick your gift. Should we explain it? Oh wait wait? It works really quick for people. Yeah Joe All right, so The everyone's got a number. Yeah whoever picks first opens their gift. That's their gift

Okay, the person that goes second. Yeah gets their gift or they have the option to take number one right so on and so forth So number six and take any of the five gift the first five gifts. Yes, however seven eight nine ten can take one Oh, also so you can get fucked. But at the end, number one gets to go again, picks the final gift. So Becky has the best number. Oh, she has to pick the gift she wants at the end of the night. She gets to pick the gifts she wants at the end of the night. Is this blocking the camera, any of this?

No, OK, great. It's blocking half of you. I just want to say this is so exciting. OK, let's go. What gift are you going to pick? It's just so great to be back. What gift are you going to pick? Oh, this one.

All right, pick it up. Yeah, that's the rule. That's your dance. That's a double gift. Yeah. Just the fact that Dan touched it is enough. Walkie-talkie. Walkie-talkie.

What's that, talkie-talkies? That's all that's in there? That's the way man. That's a stretcher and straw. Whoa. We're not kids. That looks like soda a little bit. Yeah, that's a dance order stretch Armstrong

Yeah, I'm a walkie talkies for look at that you and a friend to have fun with That why wouldn't you have a walkie talkies? I'm really hoping to get him back so Becky on it. I can talk while we lay in bed You guys didn't take shits All right Lewis you're all right Lewis is up you two right good pick Becky I can talk while we lay in bed. You guys didn't take shits. Yeah, you got it. That's great. All right, Lewis, you're right. All right, Lewis is up. You two, right?

Good pick, Becky. Yeah, Lewis sucks. Oh. Lewis sucks. Lewis sucks. Lewis sucks. Ladies and gentlemen, Mary Jean. That's all right.

What's that? Who's that from? That's from me. I brought that. You brought that, OK. No, it's not. It's from me I brought that you brought that okay suck dick no It's not a dick unless you want me to you should have picked mine What is it? Nice to guard the judge

In the description on the gift card He was gay is $25 gift card to Chipotle What's the envelope saybalobs say though? The Vembalobs with the Vembalobs. The fucking card, the thing the card came in. The card? I love Tuesdays with stories. That's it, you've read it.

Yeah, they gave that for more. More kids fans sent that. You're welcome. Hang on, read it, read it. Two mark from Susan values, $25 for the last best part on Earth. And I gave him that cigar. That's nice. I gave him that cigar.

You're a new piece of shit. You're a new piece of shit. You're a new piece of shit. $25 for a gift card. I gave him that cigar that's nice. I gave him that's a guy 25-year-old gift card gift but actually pretty good 25 to pull you Really good cigar I gave you that gave it to you You asked you said dude. I'm going away. I need some cigars. Bring me and I brought that for you now a fan gave it to me It is a regift but not from you. All right. Let's go who's next? Who's three? That's like a $50 value. Becky gets to choose if she wants to keep her gift or take my

gift. No, she doesn't. She doesn't at the end. If you want her, it's not done. Oh, I can choose if I want her. If you want to stretch her, I'm sorry. You want her to get a gift for your children. What?

Here you go. I have Aaron Burden in your house all day long. Come up then. All right, I'm three. I'm three. I'm three. They're not good. Okay, I can't get a pick, right? I bet your gifts. I'm three. I'm three. I'm three. They're not good.

Okay, I can't. I got a pick, right? I bet your gifts are stupid. That's Liz. But can I know who it's from? I bet your gift is... Can I ask you the gifts are from? Yes.

So this is from Liz. Yeah. Yeah. And this is from Lewis. And that one's from Susan and Rishi. That's the other way I've also... I know tours they bring get best gifts every year. I'm gonna take, I'm gonna take,

that's a pretty good gift. That's a pretty good gift. I mean, I'm not gonna lie, Lewis has had probably the best gifts. I bring gifts, I bring, I bring, I bring them all through. I'm gonna throw seed, he throws seed. Can I just say something?

I should have, do, D-Pu, do this once here because he's brought the worst gifts ever. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. D-Pu had the, I got it. who do this once here because he's brought the worst gifts ever. I got a belt on. I got a belt on. I got a belt on. I got a belt on. I got a belt on.

One way, bust again, the whole of the world. The next day. The next day. The best gift ever. So deep room. Yeah. We should have him next. He was a con, but you know.

Hold on, you're not on Mike. Pick up the mic. It's your show. I know. Pick up Mike. Some of the people like you. You're going to a gym a bunch first. I'm going to go. I'm going go on you're not on Mike pick up the mic. Yeah, it's your show. I know it's got Mike some of the people like you You're a gym a bunch first. I Can tell that's liquor. I'm gonna go with I'm gonna go with I'm gonna tell it's liquor all right go with Liz what dummy I'm not gonna be pressured

I'm gonna be crazy. Oha. This is the fucking worst Oka polka 100% regift I mean that would look great on the walkway up to the shed. Oh that'll I'm I'm changing with fucking Lewis. Oh I'm changing. Yeah. Yeah. Louis being a baby. Give me that fucking cigar back. Michael homers. I'm breaking it in the street. No. Come on. Do you hear me? I'm gonna throw that guy with the gun. Throw it on myself so the guy that's going for the guard in it. Heeey.

The card out loud again. Gas usual. Mark. That's great. Okay, who's next for Mike's for Mike Suarez. Mike Suarez. Come on, Mike. Come on, Mike. Go get him, buddy. Here we go. Stop looking at your watch. What do you got? I got to meet somebody.

Who? What the? What are you going to meet? You got nobody. Rich is cheating. Rich is cheating. Rich is cheating. How is going to get him in this?

He's on here. All right, what are you going to do? What are you picking? What is this? Is this a gift? It's actually a seven, the bear. Who's going for? I'm for. Oh, for right now! Why would you say anything?

Which one do you want? I'm not on the show. Just which one? Oh, yeah! I brought a great gift. I fucked up. I had a great gift. Your full time. I would say I'm going mean open whichever one first there's two gifts there

I fucked up What is it Mike sit down you're in the way What is it what is it Is it okay, so this is the auto blow-to it is the world The world's first below job machine. It's not just a regular section We got a jerk itself all of that what it is it actually has multiple motors that Recreates the a blowjob better than a woman can suck your fucking dick hands free They lay back here just suck your fucking dude. I will fucking take this and

And a 50 And Lewis will come and clean it up after. It's $200. Why did I say that? How do you call it? And then what do you do after you pull out your wallet? Oh, that's not all. Ladies and gentlemen, you call your wife in the room

and go clean this up. Also, to come with that, there is 28 blue chew pills. I got to accentuate your sense. Why did you get to do the biggest bowner you could ever fucking have fuck your Check better you could or fucking or steer check use the blue to let the auto blow to suck your cock dry Over and over and over you know that the talk to your check. Can he just whisper a joke? No, no, no I don't want to say it on it. Okay, okay. He uh, he pressured you into not taking that gift I wanted you to take the gift

Yeah, the boss got bullied you out of it. No, I just said it's probably alcohol. He's not even part of the show Attractive guy he can get his own He's got his dick sucked and the only one that needs those pills in this room. So the blue shoes are fucking retarded. They're so good. So mad. It makes you feel like you feel like his nine inches long. This is the fucking phone right here. I like you know what I like it. I never get a good What number was you? I'm sorry. I'll love you. I'm five. But he knows Five what he doesn't get five. I got an ace in the hole, baby. Oh, yeah, number five. I'm gonna be your friend. She's gonna be a blowjob machine. Do you? Do you? Please? Please grab that alpaca and give it to Lewis. I involved it. What is that?

Oh, really? No, it's full of a bunch of stuff. Oh God. What is that? Oh, really? No, it's full of a bunch of stuff. Oh, God. What is it? Voss? What is it? What is it? It's a fucking sample. Cool, cool, cool, old sample.

Is that you? You brought your fucking album? No, it's short. Are I going to? At least foot? Wee! Is that you fucking Sundry's kid? It is so good.

I can't read. Sundry's. Do I can't breathe. Do you like this? He's traded it up! Oh for now. Let's just suck on a clip of that. It better. Hope to God.

That I don't feel like a beach tonight. I can't wait to take that home Max will be playing with it tomorrow. Robot Beach sticking his arm in it. You kidding me? Vecchio is gonna see it. One mouth sleeve. Vecchio is gonna see it in the fucking dishwasher. There's no way you're getting that Come on you fuck you have everything You didn't have a fucking thorn this year. Yes, I did You didn't get it? You had no thorns. You had all roses and seeds. I'm not sure at all, but I'll take that. We all had fucking thorns. I doubled my father's gone.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I how sad is right night though. He is a vast shirt to see the Look he's fucking bum like a yeah, who's next?

This is town by what number we have must be becks six oh me oh you're six. Yeah, six. What do you want? Which one here we go? Just look like we brought a homeless guy in for Christmas. Is that a present we go hey buddy? You want that a present work bitch? You want to give that's for this is Gary Veter? Wow that looks great What is that? I don't know I like are you a card? I don't know you're gonna take that a nod He's gonna take it because it's the biggest one. That's why you took it You take your mind to feel this, this is the shit.

Wow, you take that, feel this. The box is cool, shit. Feel that, before you take it. The box is the shit, but it might be a disguise. Feel mine, feel that. But this is the shit. Don't know, you're taking that? No, no, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel.

Are you gonna take mine? That's mine. Oh, it's on it's on it. No, you don't. You got it. All right, that's it. That's a pick. And you should have this in your old age. Just help you with your anxiety.

What is it? Oh my god. Oh a painting, sir. It's a painting, sir. You can take that out. Why does everyone suck so much dick this year? Oh my god! No!

I'm giving you this for you. Oh. Dude. Wait, no, no, no. You don't own that yet. You don't own this yet. Boss, you don't own that yet. Yeah,'t own that yet. Yeah, dance get to go He wants he wants those fucking blue cheese so bad boss

Swar is you're not here. We go sure. Yeah, this is the seven by the way. It's just I have no idea what it was all right Well shut up. Yeah, good bit. Good bit, Lars. Take the headphones off of your fucking monkey. We gotta do play by play or something. This is like some dead air. So Rich Frost got watercolors. Would you get a paint set?

That's a paint set for his daughter. Okay, Mike took the big one. Motherfucker. For my mother. Oh, what is this? Here we go. Here it goes. We're starting to open big giant box. That dog. Wow, look at this thing. What is it? Oh, it's what it was. What is it? What is it? Move. It's a big. I have a

book bag. I love that and it comes with gloves. Oh, that's all I want. Where's Becky? Where's Becky? I think she would just use a good... You're gonna get taken anyhow. I want that. That's cool. What the fuck? You design that? The backpack is shake proof. If you shake, it'll keep your soda still.

That's fucking great. Or your baby. That's a great joke. You design that? That's a great joke, Joe. That's amazing.. That's a great joke. Thank you. You design that great joke Joe. That's amazing That's like a great gift Wow, I want that gift I want that I want things wait I had a bad fucking see gear For Wow, all right who's next

At a back door I love the ones wow all right who's next? Exactly Exactly I did this one to great gift pass this action you want this I don't know what that is that's an action figure Zach trying to play it cool So what is that? What's on the back? Yeah, no, no, no, that's a picture by Becky. She actually made this She took this picture and framed it herself. Oh wow. What's in the how do you hang it up?

I like that. That's pretty nice That's very nice. We guys all found out that she took the picture. Yeah, I You get it by the way, do you really the spot, guess you can hear me change mainstream I got you. Yes. What the fuck is that? Fucking day picture, Vaggett I am going Open the one with Santa's I'm not should we wait out we're gonna wait are you a night? So she she so who's 10?

That's one so there's only nine. No 10. Who's 10? I haven't gone yet. Thank you I forgot I forgot you were here I'm not he's 10 10 what the fucking you That you have a choice though do you get that backpack? You take the blowjob. He's gonna take the backpack, but I don't think so Play video. Play video. What are you born?

Oh, stop, stop. It's a cameo video. Cameo is a website where you can book personalize chat asks from your favorite people. Use this skip to get a shout out from a football player. XWWE wrestler. What's that? A drag queen. Or this catafere a faggot.

Or maybe a humorous message from one of the many comedians on Amio like this dirty old lady or this fucker or Christus Deffido what is that you got your cameo all right listen to the cameo from some of the I need to play that again did we randomly talk about how cameo stinks and you happen to get a macamiot yeah he bought you bought a McCamio Get to cameo Shit You have you have all these gifts which one do you want the paint?

This is like a deep Do you want the backpack do you want the Machine with 28 blue shoes? the backpack do you want the uh... uh... blue jubber jubber you want to take his paint is dot is no

but it wants a okay that back uh... you dad has it all has it all everybody so there

but yeah uh... god Has it all everybody so there boom by yeah Oh God You want me I'll carry that down All right, where's Becky? I got ten so where is Becky? She's coming back. Where is I'm hoping this is the last gift? Oh, the last gift right there somebody's getting up. That's from Zach. That's from Zach. I hope it's a bloody switchplay that he killed somebody with There you're the witness Finger print your all over it American eye care what you get Those are the originals acting eyed glasses as seen on like a WD. Yeah, these are glasses. Yeah, those are his original

Somebody your original that he thinks that somebody gives a fuck about him being a thing on this That we open up we all like oh I Who's Jack? I didn't even know who Jack was. What is the best part about him though? It's literally the shittiest gift. What? It's the shittiest gift ever.

It beats the Alpaca. I think that's up there with the fucking Mustang at Baltimore. So great. I don't know, or whatever. A piece of whatever history. Oh, $25 value. Hey Joe. Joe, my original gift was going to by mta receipts from four weeks ago

Wow that's sad that dams got to go home with those I was gonna give Chris Scopus pen that he used to use What a book stuff on the show and he wrote the names down for the podcast Split the blue chewing blowjob body you gifts still you can still get Hey split the blue chewing blow job. How do you give still you can still get I want to Yes, I want to understand how cringy this is Nobody knows about your glasses. Nobody knows about So fucking bad the fans don't care

Bobby barely is the reference. I know. Bobby Barely is the reference. It sucks. You know what it is? It's bad. It's either because on YankeeSwap, you either want to have a gift that everyone fights for, or one you get stuck with where you hate a person a little bit. I hope that.

The way that I hate D-Poo, for giving me that vegetable burrito one year, and I need it. It's the way I hope everyone feels about Zach for giving his fucking dumb glasses to Joe. With the reveal of like, ha ha! Can you? This is Zach, the new guy.

Honestly, I blocked it on the hashtag, but on the eye I did one time. I blocked out how bad it was and thought it might have been Joe's old glasses. My fucking glasses are fucking out You know victims of trauma make the trauma into a different thing so they can survive That gift was so bad. I pretended it was Joe's glasses that Zach gave him Shit, I love it. They are Sean John

That's something right. It's even the best thing with the last gift. It's so good on so many lives. Who has the cigar chipotle? Cause I gotta give that back to Mark. You got that? No, no, no. What do you do? You can't get this. No, you're focused.

Maybe I'm thinking we'll save you. No, I'm not giving you that that Where is it by the way? It's dark, you can't keep the cigar in the blue If they show in the fuck you I don't have it He doesn't have the blue job I don't have it Glizz has it I have this

Glizz is a blue job I will give him the fucking Chipotle back You have to give him everything I will give him everything That's how Yankees want more Oh he wants this Yeah he wants your shiver on the fish I'm getting fucking Zach's glasses

I'm number three I'm not number fucking two You're fucking This shit Fuck him on the back I don't want it. I'll get that to your wife. He wants a cigar I got it. I brought a cigar for you. I know but I want that one also I'm gonna take the glasses.

You know how funny would be to make the M-take the glasses? Then I would have an help with a planter. You have a demo switch after I'll take the help agger. Take the bag. Tell you I'm going to show up, Mike. Take the bag! No, I want the Chipotle. Fuckin' stuff.

It doesn't even belong to me. Yeah, I get the glasses. Oh, that's nice. I get the fucking Z-classes! It's not over glasses. Oh, that's nice. I get the fucking Jack glasses. Oh, yeah, Becky still has a choice. Becky, Becky, Becky, Becky didn't see the bag. Did you see the bag? Show the bag. Who has the bag? Yeah, Becky, you can take, listen, Becky, you can take, look at this. Show the bag. Oh, let let's just I know it's nice because Chris made it you can take it You can have it. So whatever your gift is you can take that

She's never wanted you're talking about she's a retarded child That's fucking gorgeous Right? Look at this I'll pack a planner though. How cool is this? What is your gift that I get if you take my Becky be sure our look at these someday Becky some days on a knee antique road show if you open these up Yeah, you're gonna go are those original exact the new guys Mr. Hill killer Wow That you bet if you don't give that up your nuts

Hey Can I get a walkie talkies I mean this is fucking... I'm literally gonna break this. I'm f- I swear. When you do, what about you walk your talkies? I'm gonna smash this into pieces. That's worked out great. Celebrate the guard of a real.

Time for a fight. Why would you bring a shitty gift to a game like this? That's the point. Dude, it's got Morse code on here. I guess that's like what this? First of all, that's a collector's item. That's the last one I've ever made. Never with more Asian.

That's the last one I've ever made. Okay, here's the deal. And the CD. Zach is the blindest fucking cocksucker I've ever met in my life. I'm gonna throw up, I can't see. Wait, I'm literally gonna throw up. I'm gonna tape down the side.

Yeah, that was, yeah. Somehow, you know what's peace on it, either? I'm not saying cocket. Really bring the pedophilia. Yeah, that was yeah, I know this piece on it either Let's all take a blue shoe and turn off the lights Take a blue to and see if we can tell what's machine and what's not oh At least this one ended Last year we didn't get to actually end oh, yeah, we didn't. We had to shut it down. Lewis fucking sure great reflexes.

I love your reaction. You can see it right here. Your reaction when this happened. You fucking smack my face. Yeah. Damn. Damn. That's you Lewis.

This is all in a second. We're dead. Look at that. I'm dead. I'm dead. I'm dead. I'm dead. I'm dead. What a fat pig she is look we're gonna face the day you Lewis I'm dead Let's just head down Guys

Zach separator Low the party all right over Yankee swap Yankee swap Christmas Those are the original glasses. You're the same. You want these, you can have these. You mail me at YKWD, or be a RyanGas.com, to be on the walkie channel six.

Maybe we should raise five bucks for charity. I want to say that I just raised over $2,000 for the kids in the hospital. We got over 300 activity kids for the Children's Hospital is up in Westchester, local chosen hospitals. Me and Donna dropping them off Thursday, I want to thank every single one of you that donated five bucks, 10 bucks, a hundred bucks

you guys came through. We're gonna be dropping all these gifts off for the kids and it's not just for the kids that are sick up there, but the kids that have to go visit family members and are in the hospital for hours. That was the one thing when I was in my dad was in the hospital. You sit in these ICU waiting rooms with families with these people that are, it's sad to shit and these little kids are just sitting there like this staring at their fucking mom

crying or whatever. These activity kids go to them too. So it's helping all these kids that have to go to the hospital whether they're in it or have to visit people there. We, over 300 of them, well exceeded what we were gonna do. I would love an activity kid. I'll bring you one. I would love one.

I'll give one for James. I'll save one. I'll put one aside for him. This way. So, thank you for doing that you guys are the best. I'm gonna put a list out of all the people that donated. All James have a birthday party. Max come yes oh it's cool same place maybe what's summer 28th uh his birthday is 29th four years after the week after I want to thank

everybody for going to Voshrostow's house you still plugging that shit no I just hope that it was great I did it so dude I love the Voshrost that was great it was awesome that's the best ever it doesn't make sense to me that it didn't sell a billion units It's crazy, you know, that doesn't make sense to you. No, I'll tell you why I'm not a billion maybe a maybe a thousand a couple thousand why because our fans your fans and they all bought we we never got Outside of our fan base how come? The podcast we did and the promote we did. She took a date.

I know. Oh, you gotta do a roast, man. You're gonna be on top. I'm telling you now. You can get on a foul and half him hold that up, man. That thing sells out now. Have you considered it's not diverse enough? Whoa.

Very diverse. Very diverse. What was that on it? There's a lesbian on it. There's a lesbian. There's a lesbian. That's not a lesbian. This is Joe to Rosy. They're saying hello How Those are good. It's a lot of old people. Yeah Remember when Judy bombed

She bought the knife. I got you. She bought Shut up. You should bomb a knife. Now, here's the deal deal with you that's super ghost face all the way to the right. Yeah, it's cervical right Kenny is right above them club So the Kenny yeah club so the Kenny and the cervical that's why I didn't some more copies why cuz a club I can't look so to Kenny and super ghost faces of a promo what's wrong with you? So all right, that's all you got? No, I'm not plucking anything today. Christmas. Christmas. Why, you got listen to my wife, Higgs. Christmas time. No.

That's all you got? And I want to thank the kids for being such a good husband. Maybe I should go home. Thank you for being part of this gang, Lish. Thank you, Lish. Maybe I should pull out your titties. Maybe you're right. Maybe you touched it, so now you have to fuck.

I want to thank all you guys for a patreon dot com slash robber cally Being a member of my page you guys are the best if you don't another member now go join Patreon plugs dog. I got yeah, but you're a plug it on what patreon huh? They're doing a thing or something I got I got big show this weekend Philadelphia December 27 28 29 Helium Philadelphia. We have a huge conglomerate with the word that's not a big show That's a bad weekend. That's between two holidays No, everybody shopping Shopping after Christmas

shopping after Christmas 27.29 You're doing a shit, man. It's like, hold on. Where am I? Where am I? I'm trying, but it's too fucking easy, man. I have to come, where am I? Go on in the middle of my head. Go on, go, go, go. Where is it? I'm going to be spoke in. I'll spoke in the coma for new years.

So make sure you check me out that weekend. Yep. You have to play the cup of spoken in the coma. I have to come. I have to spoke in. It's good, right? Class today. Do you like it?

It's good, it's great. I like your spoken. Have you done spoken? Yes. I love it. I like that town. I like it. We're talking about it. Have you done spoken? Yes. I like that town Oh cool. I love it. I can't so I'm doing new years up there make sure you go check me out Anyway up there. Lou, what do you got? Yeah, New York City. Maybe it's cold outside I love the baby. I want to go on this. Maybe we'll just step on him. Jesus, the story's January 29th, village underground.

Yeah. Legion's Thanksgiving's live, New Year's Eve, and we at the Cricking Cave with Legion's Thanksgiving party going on. Cricking Cave? Where's it really? Where's it really? The first 10 people get in.

And you get to basically be with a fucking girl. Where are you? Are you doing the big room? Alright, I'm serious. You're doing fucking Spokane, Washington, on fucking New Year's Eve. He's put on the top room to the country, Tommy. I hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope that's all by hope They're good. We're gonna put this in the back. Okay, it's good. Tacomas are fucking killer rooms. Tacomas are bunch of the whole town's full of fucking gays and blacks. To great fucking rooms.

No, it's not at the very liberal town's blacks. Every single one of them. There's a lot of little trucks and... Two great rooms, right? No, we're doing legions. Gangs and fry, we're doing black swatges. Look at the fact that you have fucking have an eight person show on New Year's. First of all, first of all, we're gonna sell the fuck out. We'll have 200 people a fucking do Mike

Can sell out the freaking Sell out some Mike Suarez. Yeah, nothing We're gonna fucking talk over it What couldn't he sell out why couldn't he sell the Mike Suarez family reunion, but that was pretty good was family reunion but that was pretty good. That's funny. There's a right. Because like, you know, it's have big families. So we got it.

If they don't get stabbed to death. You're gonna stay in the front. Are you guys the... And Big Cage, don't it, too? We're just gonna stay on some friends. Yeah, that's a good one. Nobody's gonna show up. That was fun because I thought it was just a joke, but then you explained it and it made

it even better. Sold out around the country, the drill, real ass print, incredible. PJ was in there. Sold out. Yeah. Yeah, sold out. All right, this is getting too passive a question. You guys started your first game.

You guys started your first game. Lewis can't tell, fuck it, maybe I'll change that up. Lewis can't say it. He gets, all right, we saw the photos. Good job. We can ask Hank's live. I've hit the Creeky Cave New Year's Eve. Woo!

A bunch of amazing comics, three live podcasts. Standup shows all night from 9 p.m. to 4 a.m. We're partying all night. Oh, nice. All right, good. No, you're saying? It's cool. Oh, no.

It's cool. It's also cold in the creek. They didn't pay their electricity. They gotta keep the doors open. They're using heat. Diction. The wind went up too high. Stammering.

I even considered that Amazon. That's gonna be a issue. They got shut down by the department. The food is a little. They ran a, cat. The camp is so cute. No, it's a rat. Was this special canoe?

I don't know yet. It's gonna be March or April. How to go? Incredible, really fun. Really amazing. Are you April 1 April first your birthday Oh Are you putting it online or you can try to sell to a network? I my agent is gonna say we're gonna try to sell to a network put the not gonna buy it

So it'll be on Amazon and iTunes and they just get on tell a moondow or something Tell him moondow What was it? Why would you end on that one? Oh It's pretty good. I think we have one getting tired. That was decent. Oh, I don't know. Oh, damn.

There's some wall. Dan's got everything. Why do you say that? That is not true. He does not belong. What don't you have? He's got everything, including one of the worst headshots I've ever seen. Where?

Right there. It didn't. You shouldn't be in fucking hell. I actually liked that headshot. Thank you, Bobby. You shouldn't be in a fire. Looks like he just got punched by Lewis. Thank you right on the right side Or yeah, but you guys being punched in the face might bring that up. I mean what an idiot. He's just

The new Mike is great. This guy listens. I'll be Atlanta at the end of July at the Atlanta punchline January at the Atlanta punchline. And January, I'm stoked. You know what color my play did? What's the other one? The laughing skull. Laughing skull, dude. What a fuck. A great room.

I mean, I'm the least one. I'm the worst the board. He's never, he only plays fucking, he only plays a little shit venues around the country. Oh really? Oh, like the DC improv. Oh, did you hear that? Earbob?

Bobby Kelly called you a shit venue. I did. I just did. Yeah, listen to a Fump. I don't work there. They never fuck them. You heard me saying all these places. Fuck them. I've never worked there. Fuck them. D.C. and Braw. Dan Soder also known as corporate. Yeah. Fuck her. You heard me. All right. Why can't you do that? But I can't do do that I'm just gonna do it You shit you fucking drunk I fuck I I'm not a true spirit Bobby's I'm Bob

Robber my mom Robber Robber Robber Robber Robber Robber Robber

Robber Robber Jack's glasses Jack's glasses Jack's glasses Jack's glasses Jack's Jack's

Jack's Jack's Jack's Jack's Jack's Jack's Jack's Jack's Jack's Jack's for a new year's Albee in San Antonio at Lafayette Loud featuring that weekend but the Thursday before hand you gotta say who you're featuring for? Leon Morgan who's that? exactly um just who knows if you I hope she's fired from the weekend

no no she's she is so it's right she's one of the t-ass for me so I think she lost she's fucking great good for you who I think I like Leon Morgan she's really funny she's really great down like that area so Becky what do you got well Let me finish my thing hurry up Where else before I'll be headlining a door deals if you come out to any of the shots where that one laugh out loud oh good Go see Mike Mushy Mike Bushy Mike go see him laugh all loud and Santana. Yes. Can I say a thing for my dog real quick? Like my literal dog. Remember last year my dog was sick? He still is. Is he sick? Yeah, he has a girl with that

His neck. Your dog's been sick for a year. He had like gross in his eyes. Oh Please. Sorry, buddy. What's up? What do you want to do? There's a canine. Oh, you oh, Baba. Oh, man. I'm sorry, Mike. Oh, what happened? He's crying. No, he's not. He And I'm sorry Mike. Oh what happened? He's crying. No he's not. He. Lewis please. Alright stop.

No no. Mike alright buddy. I love you kid. So you do it, you gotta go find me? Yeah. You gotta go find me what's the go find me do? Go find me to get the, I'm sorry buddy, you don't want it,

it's okay, you can cry, don't worry about it. Dude, get your dog. Yeah, we'll plug it though. Go find me. Go find me what? For surgery, for his eye It's like a fucked up game of charade How much is it go fun? I need he needs a surgery on this. He looks like a growth. How much is the man? How much surgery Mike? It's like a thousand dollars

Stop crying I'm not doing a fucking point of words. Stop crying, you'll give me the thousand dollars. Yeah, if I don't, I'm gonna listen to voice fine. I'm not giving it to my walkie talkies. It's all, it's a thousand bucks. Yeah, that's easy. 800 from Bobby and I. What if you're the money for your dog surgery?

Stop being on in public. What if... Stop being uncomfortable. Let him fuck the crowd. What is the money for your dog surgery stop being what is on in public? What is We're gonna make fun for being such a fucking Just starts barking when he feels uncomfortable You're tears are gonna get side me? You're not, you're tears are gonna get signed me. You're tears make me dirty. Do you ever find it? Hey, you know what? Leigh Sharon touched with your emotions.

Dice big dad on our scene, Neil. Ruin his career. What are you doing on that? What are you doing on that? I'm not saying no. Okay, there it is. I said I'm not saying it. By listen, does the thing that is next thing

that the thing on Lewis is next? I'm gonna give you some money right? We'll give him 100 bucks right now. 100? Dude, we'll just give us the go find. We'll take care of it. What's the go find me please? The thing on Lewis is Give him a hundred bucks right now Now We're doing it you just cried We can just all give him the money man do it now Dude no, we're gonna give him the money and other people no

I think we should delete all this out of the episode because that's the one. It's gonna be more than a bill. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, Stead you don't know the go for me. You don't even know your own go for me. Mother. You're all emotional. Yeah Directly this and I've the you'll cut That's not believe bring it back up get on your marks Lewis. Let's fucking do that stupid thing again Still rolling Mike don't give it to him. He'll spend that on food. Oh Wait, man don't dogs have nine lives. No, that's cast. Oh, you did that joke last night. I know what it killed What is it?

Oh my god, thank you very much. Oh my god. Wept the tears out of you. Jesus Christ Speed it up or your dogs are not Jesus Christ Speed it up or your dogs are not gonna make it We have a second growth of the year Here's your turning in a gravy let's go Did I look George Lewis being rattled by emotion? What is this? What are you doing the Puerto Rican rattled by emotion? Yeah, boy, that was a oh no. Why is the I came I knew glasses Bobby

I hate that I got those fucking glasses I thought that exact thought it was gonna kill to like you thought I couldn't be happier with my walk Okay, here it is right here It's $1,500 first of all you need you more than a thousand, so please go to this and donate. He needs a thousand, but he's been a scumbag. The truth is he needs a thousand, he's taking that 500 to go in a fucking Tijuana. I don't know, I think that's the little guy,

little tiny dog, is in front of the camera, Zach. Aw, all right, little look at that, man. Is it two heads? No, that's the two, my man. That's the growth. What? That's his body. Oh my man. That's the growth. What? That's his body. Oh my Christ.

That's his body. Oh, get it removed, fuck. Okay. Look, just don't show it. Lewis is walking on punching a lawnmower. He's carrying it. Oh, he's your red dog. Let me see.

Hang on a second. He's a bum, dad. He's deleting the go find me. Where's the bum? Okay. Bobby's siphoning it into his own umbrella. So it's a fundraiser byfun me. Where's it? Uh-uh. Bobby Siphoning it in New Zealand. Oh, good. So, it's fundraiser by Michael V. Shores. That's S-U-A-R-E-Z.

Um, you can they Google that? Because there's no link here. We're gonna put the link up on all the stuff tonight, even my thing tonight. I mean, but we're gonna say we would pay the entire go-fun me. Oh, you said that. Mike, come here. We'll text me on the link. We'll be on $1,000. We'll be on $1,000. We We'll give a thousand of it right now.

We'll give a thousand of it right now. We'll help you with this. I mean, I will always to Lewis it helps you first. I'll put you 50 right now. Give it to me right now. I'll donate right now, Bobby. You fucking cheap fuck. I'm not a cheap guy.

I just raised $3,000 for children. What about the bull? Those dogs, those kids are great artists. He said two. He said two. I donated two to my hundred to the kid. No, I didn't. I'm not giving, I'm not, you're not taking the money out of you from him, fucking losing

a fight. If you owe me a hundred, what should you give us? When it's going to. I'm not doing that. That's weird shit. I'll just give you the hundred. I don't want the money We'll do another bet if the patrons go to the Super Bowl or something. They're not going. Yeah, give it to Lewis Not after this. It's gonna donate right now

I'll donate right now. They might go. Are we all gonna put 250? Yeah, I'll put it here in it. I were all gonna put 250 and then you guys it's it's 15 at all. She's not there yet So donate to 52 52 52 that's 1250 See these 200 more. Yeah, it's alright. So just go there and donate because it's probably gonna be more than that I was just supposed to be here You guys All right you guys Merry Christmas As soon as we walk out here Joe none of us are giving anything Dog is been alive for five years

Joe and neither would Nate. Oh, no. Oh, shit. Vos is back. Vos is back. Vos is back. Vos is back. Vos. Tell you what, if I hit a, a, a bonus in Philly, I'll give 40 bucks. So you're not, not happening. So, uh, Joe Vos Dan, Lewis, Michael, Becky, Liz, Oscar, Rover, we got Frightknight, we got Zach. If each one puts in, that's less than 250, I'm saying.

No, I just wanna say, I really, I just wanna say this, really quick, I really love you guys so much. I'm so fucking proud of, we do this every year and it's so much fun, I look forward to it, I love you guys, you guys from back when we started this every year and it's so much fun, I look forward to it. I love you guys. You guys, from back when we started this, and for you guys who are now, it's fucking incredible to me how insane you guys

have done it, except for Vos. But, no, of course Vos too, but Lewis, he's in the middle of a plateau. It's, you guys are amazing, and I'm so glad you keep coming back and doing this. I love you guys so much. Mike, we're gonna raise the money for you, dog don't worry about you keep coming back and doing this. I love you guys so much. Mike, we're gonna raise the money for you, dog don't worry about it. Liz, I love you.

I love you, Becky. I love all of you guys. I love you fans. Thanks for listening to this. You know what, dude, podcast, Yankee Swap, Merry Christmas, Happy New Years. And we'll see you guys next year. Bye. Thank you.

Thank you. You've been listening to the YKWD podcast. Thanks for listening. Now go back to your shitty jobs. Shitty jobs. Shitty jobs. Check out riotcast.com for all of the best podcasts on the internet. And they're all free. And they're all free and they're all free. you you