Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - YKWD #572 | Steve Byrne | I Got A Story

Episode Date: February 2, 2025

This week on YKWD Steve Byrne comes on to the pod to tell stories from their past. Support the show and start your free online Hims Hair visit at https://www.hims.com/YKWD Get the EXTRA YKWD, Watch LIVE and UNEDITED AT https://www.patreon.com/robertkelly LIVE FROM THE SHED AND MORE ON PATREON DUDE!!! https://twitter.com/robertkelly https://twitter.com/YKWDpodcast http://instagram.com/ykwdudepodcast https://www.facebook.com/YkwdPodcast/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Yeah, baby, we're starting the podcast right now. We're back. You know what, dude? Live. Welcome, everybody to the show. YKWD. I started a social media podcast. The YKWD podcast. YKWD is back again. Old school, back in the day where it all started before them all. YKWD.

This podcast is so fun and crazy. It has no rules. God, how are you I'm ruining this. Where's the bar banner, man? I'm sorry, it's a comedy podcast. This isn't NPR. That's what this podcast does. Is there any better show?

This is the original. Original. What's up, everybody? It's Robert Kelly. We're live above the world famous comedy cellar at the Comedy Cellar Studios with another episode of YKWD with probably one of my oldest friends in the business, Mr. Steve Byrne. Hi. Not Byrne's. No. Byrne. But this is, I think this might be the first time you ever called me Byrne. Hi. Not Byrne's. No. Byrne. But this, I think this might be the first time you ever called me Byrne.

Well, we're older now. Yeah, I mean the first, I think. It was Steve Byrne's. Byrne's, yeah. Byrne's. Dude, I was thinking about like, you know, we haven't hung out in a while. You're in Nashville, you're in LA, you're in Chicago.

You kind of went and did, you know, we went our separate ways and that happens with comedy, right? We go you do this, I do that, we all kind of, if you're doing what you're supposed to be doing, we, the sucky part about comedy, right, is that when we're middleers, openers, we're together every night. Right, and then I went off to be a headliner. Hahahaha! Hahahaha! Hahahaha! Hahahaha! Sorry!

Pinky up and... Passive-aggressive sip! Go and we're back! Yes! Well, dude, you went off to fucking direct and make movies and kind of you did all kinds of wild shit that, you know, yes, you went to be a headliner. So did you.

I mean, I know they know that. I'm a legend in this business. I'll never forget the time when you were, you, oh man, you were, you were, and I don't mean to interject, but we were in Tampa, you're at Tampa, you're headlining at SideSplitters. One of, both of us mutually can say one of our favorite clubs in the country. One of the best, and here's,

here's what I give us credit for. Everybody else was like, go over to that club, the other club, and I was like, fuck you. This is a comedy club. By the way, and other club, and I was like, fuck you, this is a comedy club. By the way, and since BT took it over, like one of the best. Yeah, I mean, I like Bobby Jewell. He was old school, but BT modernized it.

And yeah, yeah, yeah. Made it like a totally fun club. But you're headlining there, and my folks live down there, and I was in town visiting my folks and I'm like, oh, you know what, I'm gonna surprise Bobby and I go down. So I get in the car, I go down and I can tell you're wrapping up your set

and I was like, oh, I'm just gonna jump up and fuck with him before his closer, right? So I go up on stage. And that's good, you wanna build an act all the way to the end, get to the end where you get the, woo, yeah, thank you, good night, and that's when you should do it, good timing. Oh, that's that.

You go, oh, don't come up here and act like people know who you are, and I was like, what the fuck, dude? I mean, it's not like I'm barking outside, and I just think we're friends, like we're friends, what the fuck? So that was like typical Bobby. It's like, it doesn't matter how long it's been.

It just, you're still right there with the axe, ready to take me down a notch. Well, here's the thing, dude. Our relationship, let's not forget this. Your going away party, when you're moving away, I'm leaving New York. I'm moving to the big, bright lights of Hollywood, and you had a big party where.

I wouldn't say a big party. Because nobody showed up except for me, your only friend, nobody came, I was the only one, look at me, look at me, I was the only one, and I've never seen you sadder when you went, you opened the door and I was like, Hey, what's up? You're like, come on in. It was just me, your mom and your dad having Korean barbecue. My mom made Korean barbecue. Well, I only invited, well, I invited like you and my black friends and they, none of them showed up. Yeah. Nobody showed up

except for me. I was the only friend that you had. Know that. That should tell you something about me. It says a lot about me. Says more about me. I have no fucking friends. And how bad is it? You're my only friend. That's how bad it is.

God damn right. I remember, I remember. You have two friends in this world and one of them's dead. The other's right here. Yeah, the other one ones downstairs about to die Bro Keith's cane is gonna be right here in plexiglass in about six months I want the one with the suction cups that stays up.

Yeah, dude, we came up. Me, who, let's, because I'm kind of between groups. Because I came with Billy, Patrice, Dane, and then Norton and Voss and Keith. But then there was my generation, that's the way I was looking for, generation was you, Corielli, Godfrey, Dove. That was more my generation.

But then I kinda started hanging out with the younger guys, Joe List, Dan Soda, Lewis, Jay. So I had like, I always hung out in these different generations of comics. But my real generation of comedian, if I was to look back, was you, Dove, Corielli, DC. That was my generation of comics. Ben Bailey. Ben Bailey.

Yeah. Meneve. Russ Meneve. But you, I remember when I first passed there, everyone was like, oh, Bobby, Bobby, Bobby, Bobby, like kills, kills, kills. And you were very, very animated and physical. I think when you're younger, right,

you sell the joke more. I was definitely guilty of that. But you were a performer, like you totally, you performed the jokes. And I remember you would kill so hard and then you'd be gone. Everyone's like, where's Bobby? And you would go to the cooler to cool down.

And you would literally just go in that freezer and then I was like, wow, that's a smart thing to do because we would get so animated and stuff. Either I go in the cooler or I go in that closet down there and get a blow job for some chick. Yeah, dude, I, I used to fucking flip. I mean, really go nuts on stage. Really. I'm always sweating every set. But I think there was a time when I was getting older and I think this happens with certain

comedians where they don't adjust. Yes. Yeah. You don't adjust to your life, your age, where you're at, and what you're really doing. And if you don't adjust to it, you look silly. You know what I mean? You look a little silly. I remember, not to, look, I mean, the last time I did the Tonight Show, so I did the Tonight Show quite a few times,

and Jay Leno was always so outgoing and very kind when I was there. And I remember the last time he came to my, his dressing room, the dressing room I was in, and he said, he was just catching up and, you know, making small talk and then he goes, he goes, hey, just a piece of advice. I go, yeah, he goes, you know, those like, sex jokes,

you can do like sex jokes and then eventually you're gonna be like the creepy guy telling sex jokes. And I was like, oh yeah, and then as soon as you said it, like I backlogged like all the guys I'd seen at the store, the seller that were like a little older, talking about like, you know, banging chicks, and it was like, that's kinda creepy, and then once Jay planted that seed, I just shut it off.

And I was like, all right, I'm not doing that anymore. Well, I have to disagree. I think if you're talking about sex and banging and blah, blah, blah, but if you're talking about, like now, I talk about sex with my wife. But it's self-defer, you know what I mean though, right? Yeah, if you're talking about banging bras and blah, blah, blah, relax.

I'm not banging anything. My wife, I literally said to my wife over the vacation, I said, I go, are we ever gonna have sex again? She went, we will. And then walked away. And that's it. That's it. That's my sex life right now.

But back in the day, bro, let me tell you something. There's no better, I'm gonna say, there's no better wingman, there's no better dude out there than you. Because you were the guy who was like, yeah, you used my apartment. Always, yeah. Well, I always, I remember I used to get shredded

all the time by everybody downstairs, everybody downstairs like, she just hung out with her? I'm like, yeah. Like, you didn out with her? I'm like, yeah. Like you didn't bang her? I'm like, no. And I would like, I mean, we've seen some stone cold assassins downstairs.

I'll never forget, there was a comedian. Can I say, you wanna just leave it or? No. Oh, Dove? Dove was a killer. To this day, I've never seen it in my life where I was dating somebody way out of my league. Yeah, she was like a Ford model and she brought another Ford model with her.

Right. And just like what? And I bring him in. I sit him down and I'm like, what do you girls want to drink? I go, oh, and dove, as soon as he sees a beans line, guys, this dove. Hey, I get the drink order. I go to the bar. I get the drinks. I come back, her and the girl are gone. And then I go, I go, where'd she go? She goes, I don't know, she left with Dove. She just walked outside. And we sat there and waited and waited and waited. It was like two hours and she comes back, the mascara's

running, the hair's fucked up. It just looked like she got, she was like in a garbage can knocked over by a bunch of raccoons and ravaged her. And we all knew instantly and I was like, I've never seen anything like, it was, Bobby when I tell ya, seconds, it was under a minute, 100%. You was a killer man. You've never seen anything like that.

Buddy, I tell you what, I used to have Godfrey. Yeah, and already were my chick test. I Used to bring girls down. Yeah, and if and if they if they were into those guys I would Because they would try to fuck your mother oh, yeah, yeah, they would fucking they would finger fuck your sister in front of you They would they didn't give a shit They were assassins too. Yeah, and they would just try to bang and I remember I bring girls down and they'd be like, oh he's nice I'd be like guys not gonna work out And I remember when I brought my wife down one who is my wife now as my chick back then and she was like They're kind of annoying. I was like, yeah You get a buddy I remember me and Keith were out front one night

and we were talking to these two young Puerto Rican girls. They were smoking young, way out of our league at that point, you know what I mean? I'm hanging out with Keith. And we were fucking the shit, but I remember Dove, Godfrey, and you. We were out front talking and all of a sudden we felt the air change and we saw you guys were like this just sitting there

watching us Slay our horseshit game and you were just letting us And then I remember we looked at we were like, hi We just backed away. I was like bye girls and you guys stay in school you guys just Just started talking and we just left. We were like, god damn. The kid was like, god damn. It was like, the young lions coming to take out the old lions.

That was, well, I mean, I think it was, to your point, it was like everybody was young enough and single. And they come in. I remember when I first moved to, because I left and I went to the improv in the comedy store in LA. Yeah. Why did you do that? Because I felt like after nine years in the city,

I was like, I remember somebody had done Letterman for like the fourth time. It was like Geraldo or somebody. Somebody had done the, like Letterman. Yeah. And was like, that's as big as it gets, right? Right, at the time, yeah. Did the fourth time and it was like,

and I remember whoever it was came back and was just like, yeah, it was great. I was like, isn't that exciting? I was like, yeah, but I did it like so many times. It's like, and then I was just like, I guess that's it in New York, right? Like in New York, the best you could do is SNL or like Letterman.

Yeah. And that was it. And then I was like, well, I want more. So I was like, that's why I moved to LA. So that's why I kind of went because I was just I just it was like the old thing. It sounds stupid. But like if you can make it there, you can make it anywhere. And I was had that notion in my head of like New York City. And I was like, at the time I was doing every club

like you I mean, we're making the rounds at night. I mean, show after show after show after show you do like you do like seven or eight. That was the norm for us back then. Seven or eight shows a night. And it wasn't here doing just the three or four rooms. It was like, we were in cabs going this, although there was no standards, just like everything. And we were carpet bombing the whole city

and it was different, it was exciting. And it was like, how long am I gonna do this though? And that's when I was like, I just wanted more. I knew there was more and that's why I went to LA. Because I have so many, when I look back about stories with friends, there's so many things that I have with you that are some of the funniest. And worst?

And worst, but some of them, I'm going to say two of them. My two favorite Steve stories. Oh Jesus. Where you, there's three, but I'll tell two. One was when I did Carson Daly for the first time. And it was a big win for you. But my first late night type of show, especially I'm dirty, I was dirtier back then. And I'm like, people told me you'll never be on late night.

And I got on. And I'm like, this is fucking great. And I remember being there. And I remember, and I'm sitting there going, well, this is weird. He has no opener, there's no warm up. And he did like an hour, he's doing an hour with Sam Rockwell about acting, and it was like fucking just tedious,

and they just go, you're going on, and I'm like, okay, I'm so cocky, I kill all the time, I don't even think I'm gonna bomb, and I go out there and they give me a cordless mic, which I'm not used to. I'm used to having it. I have the mic and I have the little thing. Your timing, you know? And it sounds different too, like even these right here. Yeah. Whatever these things are called.

These like... Shure 58s. But these mic afros. Yeah. Like for somebody like you, you were very energetic. You'd bring it up close. And hear the timing. You could hear it all. It's so different when you have this. No monitors.

Yeah. And I didn't know any of that shit. And I went up there and I fucking took a hot one. And I'm bombing. But I'm bombing and I didn't know that I did this, but when I bombed, I would take the mic cord and kinda stretch it out and do this. All of a sudden, I start going like this.

If you watch it, I'm doing this. I come off. And there's no mic cord. There's no mic cord, I'm just doing this. I'm just jerking off a guy over here. I come off my agent, Matty Frost, he's like, what the fuck was this? And I go, what?

And he goes, you kept going like this. And I'm like, I don't know. He's like, let's get the fuck out of here. But I'm like, nobody watches Carson Daly. I'm fine. I come down here when it's playing and it's on the TVs. But we're all watching. You, you set it up.

You. Come on, we knew you were on. I was excited. I was excited to watch you. But I'm excited because there's no sound. So I'm like, thank God, no sound. Right, okay. But there was closed caption.

Yes. And the closed caption, you're like, how'd you do it? I'm like, yeah, it was good. And I wasn't gonna tell anybody, no sound. The closed caption guy on the first joke wrote, light laughter. I don't know if I've ever seen you happier. You bombed.

Well, I pointed, I go, light laughter. You're, ah, fuck you. Because you go, you bombed. I'm like, I bombed. I was so fucking hurt. I was so mad at fucking deaf people. Great. But the greatest part of that story was I think a year or something later I'm in a hotel in some shitty club, half full

late night, Friday night, and I turn on the old Carson Daly and fucking there you are and I put on the closed caption and this fucker hated you too because he wrote light laughter on it yeah and I'm like you my oh you got me right back I called you immediately yeah great and there's nothing worse than like that happening right but then I'm I'm on the road, I'm in a hotel, I'm like watching and I'm like, oh, that was awful, bring Robert Kelly, it's like, fuck, of all people, of course.

Worst part about that, I did it again and bombed again. Buddy, I bombed twice on Cars and Daily. I bombed so bad, I started just roasting the Bacon Brothers. I was just like yeah you know what I'm giving his brother good stuff right or whatever I don't know what I said. Yeah it was the worst. That was the worst late night show ever. It was the worst. I got remember he had when he did in he moved to LA for the last year he had a band there was a three-piece jazz band. Oh really? A guy playing piano. Ibed so hard, the guy playing piano started heckling me. I was like, are you fucking heckling me?

Fuck. I was so bad. Bad, but here's my other Steve Burns story. We used to do Beaches Madhouse. There was, I think, four people that could do that show. Me, you, Sherrod, and Dove. Dove, yeah. Were the only guys that consistently

could pull that show off. Yeah. 2,500 people in the theater. Strippers, hookers, famous people. You know, I mean. Everybody. Paris Elton, Britney Spears, Tarantino, they all came through there.

Worst fucking gig ever. Bachelorette, bachelor parties, they were there and they had fucking midgets and tits and jugglers and the seven foot gay Russian sword swallower. Lenin. Lenin, that's his name, Lenin. Who would go, and only us could do it. And I remember we were there a lot together because we, because, you know, we could do it.

We'd anchor it. Yeah. And I remember you would go out. You went up before me one night and you had this thing you did. This isn't the story, but I remember this. And you would go you had that, you know, because you had to pull. Right. Right. Bells and whistles. I don't give a fuck. It was survive.

You know, do it. Yeah. And I remember you had this thing that worked every time you would go. What about you guys? Ah, ah, what about you? Well, they're a little better. What about you? And you would, what about you? And the fucking, what about you? And then it worked every time.

One night you got so carried away, the crowd got so fucking hyped up. You left the stage and ran to the back. Yeah. Cause they were like, good night. You went all the way to the back. Yeah.

And didn't know you had to walk all the way back to the stage in silence. And I remember you just walking and it was like, it seemed like a 30 minute walk. Yeah. Cause then you walked in here to roll back up on stage. What's up guys? And it was, it just, you. What's up, guys? And it was it just you.

So Bruce Lee, I killed my own momentum. You poured water on your fire so fast. I was just I was upstairs going, fuck it. What's he doing? Awful. So I remember the next day. This is fucking one of the funniest things ever. I'm sitting there and we got to do the show Saturday night. We're going to do this fucking show. And I went I'm sitting there and I'm, we gotta do the show. Saturday night, we gotta go do this fucking show. And I went, I'm gambling. Just slots, I did slots. And I fucking put a 20 in and it was a nickel slot.

I was like, oh fuck me. And I just pushed the button immediately. And that's back when they gave you 400 nickels. Right, yeah. Four, I had a. You get the bucket. I had a bucket of 400 nickels, and I was Bullshit, so then I go to the cashier line. Yeah fucking a bunch of assholes. I gotta go I'm sitting there in line with 400 nickels, and you walk up, and this is the work look at with me

I'm a dick yeah with you hey, what's up, man? But dick is coming all right you like hey, what's up, man? But dick is coming. All right. You were like, hey, what's up, dude? I'm like, what's up, man? And I'm like, what's going on? And I'm like, dude, I went and I fucking put a thing in. I got 400, before I give 400 out, you just went fucking. You, you slapped the body of four, and you heard the sound it made was shooosh. It was magical.

The whole casino heard it and I went and you walked away. And I'm sitting there. I can feel my heart right now. And I went to walk away and the security guy went, no, no, no no, no gotta pick this shit up. Yeah, you're gonna pick it up now on my fucking knees Picking up four to Nichols embarrassed in front of everybody that's going to the show and then I look and there's a guy Squatting down in front of me. Yeah, yeah, and I'm like yo, dude. Did you take my Nichols? Yeah, and he went no What are you crazy? I went to cash in Did you take my nickels? Yeah.

And he went, no. What are you crazy? I went to cash in $19.90. This fucking piece of shit took two of my nickels. I walked around for an hour looking for this guy. I was so mad at you, dude. So mad at you. But one of the funniest things.

My favorite to this day was that day I played hockey know, I played hockey and you need a hockey stick when you're rollerblading. You, but you don't need to. Otherwise you look like you're rollerblading. Right. Okay. But you don't need to do S's. Okay.

I wrap up in central park. I'm coming back. I'm coming where that we used to live in Hell's Kitchen. So it's, I'm coming slightly downhill. Downhill. where that, we used to live in Hell's Kitchen, so I'm coming slightly downhill. Downhill. So you slalom. Night dive. You slalom down.

Or, or. To slow up. Or gayskate. Or gays. I mean, you gotta look at it from our perspective. Yeah. Me and Norton had just went to the Starbucks on 47th Street. Yeah.

We're going, we just got, I mean, summer night, beautiful. We both got latte, iced lattes. We're, it's like, we're talking, and then we see, we literally see this gay guy just coming down, night to night. Because my stick got snapped, and I'm in a tank top in shorts, S-curling down there. We were like, look at this fucking queer. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha at this fucking queer. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Well the worst is I'm, I'm, I'm slaloming, and as I am, I see you guys walking to, and I'm like, oh fuck, and as soon as I have like the recognition that's Bobby and Norton, I see you both dying laughing at me. Norton's literally pointing at me. Because we're looking at this gay guy coming down on roller skates. That's what we saw. And it's our friend Steve Byrne coming down. And you, dude, you skate up to us, do that

thing. Look at me. We're laughing at you, making fun of you. And you slap my latte out of my hand. I slapped both your lattes and then I skated on. And I heard you both dying laughing. I was like, all right, that was worth it. Buddy, it hurts. So we were, dude, I'm pretty sure we were both like, dude, this is great. Like we both were enjoying these lattes so much. Vente, Trente lattes by the way.

So fucking funny. This is my favorite seller story and involves Patrice and he was the ringleader behind, I don't know if I ever told you this one. What is that? But I'm maybe two weeks in, I pass at the seller, I'm 22 or 23, I don't even know what the seller means. I had no idea, no clue how big the seller was, right?

Keep my coffee away from you. I pass at the seller, I'm in, and as I'm performing there, in two or three weeks, it's all starting to dawn on me. I'm like, holy shit, like, I don't belong here, but she keeps booking me, and I'm watching everybody, and just eyes wide open, like, holy shit, it hits you, right? And within 24 to 48 hours of the realization

of how significant this opportunity is, and how desperate every comic in the world is to perform at this club, I'm like, okay, well, I got to earn my keep. I got to really dedicate myself and give it my all every show. So I go downstairs, Keith introduces me, I go on, and all of a sudden I see Patrice walk in, and he turns around and he nods. He doesn't say a word the whole time, he just nods. And he enters, and this is Tuesday.

This is in the cellar when nobody was here, right? So Patrice, Voss, Norton, Geraldo, and there were like two other comics. You might have been there, I don't know. I was. You guys all been there, I don't know. I was. You guys all sit in the front row, and now it's like somebody's pulling my spine at it, and I could feel the vertebra going,

boing, boing, boing. Like I'm literally losing all willpower, and I'm dying, dying a slow death. And I'm like, all right, well you know what, I'm dying, but at least death. And I'm like, all right, well, you know what? I'm dying, but at least I got this Bruce Lee bit. And that's gotten me out of every jam in the world. And so Patrice knows my closer. So I'm like, all right, you know, you win some,

you lose some. And I'm like, you know, I feel bad for Linda Lee, Bruce Lee. And then I just see Patrice lean forward and he looks at everybody and he does the second head nod and as I'm doing the thing One you guys like you you were synchronized like the Rockettes you all got up and and just followed him like mother duck and all the baby ducks and it took all the energy because everybody's seen every one of you guys and I ate it so fucking to this day. It's the biggest bomb I've ever had in my life.

Because it was so psychological. It stayed with me like permanent marker for days. And then I come upstairs, and every one of you fuckers ignored me. Everybody ignored me. So I'm like, oh fuck. So I go to the bar and I get a beer, and I'm like, well, I'm gonna get my stuff

and I'm gonna drink this beer. And then Patrice just goes. And I'm like, well, I'm gonna get my stuff and I'm gonna drink this beer. And then Patrice just goes. And I was like, you motherfuckers. And it was like one of the most devastating yet coolest kind of things. And I think that to me kind of like symbolizes like the table, the cellar, all of it. I think that.

Well, if we didn't like you, we wouldn't even talk to you. 100%, yeah. That's the one thing, if, look man, I've almost cried at that table. Like I've had. I've seen people cry at that table. Yeah, I've almost been in tears,

trying to be like, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I'm gay. And, yeah dude. It's fucked, it's weird because back then, there was so less comedy, like I was talking, I talk about this all the time, but comedy was a shit job and there was less, there was so many, you know, less, there was less comedians. So few of us doing it. So few of us doing it because it was such a fuck you job and then, you know, back then that crew of guys,

we elevated, we elevated each other all the time because you'd see somebody get better. And you'd see that switch that hit with Geraldo. I was like, what the fuck? Then you'd see Patrice and Norton. I remember Norton, I saw him when I'm like, fuck, I have to work better. I gotta work harder because he's fucking killing it.

And it happened with you, Dove, Godfrey. I remember Godfrey, Godfrey was a, I mean, dude. Still is. Still a murderer. I mean, just a fucking murderer. But I remember he would go up last. It was either me, you or him going up last. We always had the one to two slots, all of us.

But if you were on after Godfrey, it was like, if you were hosting with Godfrey, it was like, if you were hosting with Godfrey, it was a nightmare. Yeah. Because he was just gonna go on. Oh, he'll do 10 minutes in between fucking acts. Buddy, it was nuts. I mean, I used to light his money on fire.

I swear to God. He'd be on stage, I'd give him the light 15 fucking times. I gotta go home, I can hear birds. Oh my God. And I would sit there and light his money, and be like, dude, I'm lighting your money on fire to get him to fuck off stage, dude. That is so funny. It's fucked up.

Yeah, he would kill. I'll tell you, one of the hardest I've laughed in a long time, I saw him doing his subway thing where he, you know, he just gets into a character. And it doesn't even become a bit. It becomes like a character exploration. Like what is the stupidest things this character could say? And he was being a homeless guy on the subway. And he was a homeless guy hitting up black people.

King, king, yo, you my king, you my king. Queen, you my queen. And he just did this for 10, 15 minutes. And it was one of those things where I think we as comics know when you like drain the bit and it's over, but then you still commit and do it and then you know it's gonna boomerang back around again yeah he did that one night and it's I remember falling over like in the booth and I was like if he can if he says that cadence one more time like my organs yeah may shut down I was laughing so fucking hard he's one of the only guys

that like really just fucking he he really just stuck to what he does You know what I mean? He stuck to it because he should look at my eyes that guy was gonna be famous He would everybody said he was gonna be the next motherfucker. I don't know what the fuck happened. Yeah luck has to be luck Something but he did find his thing 100% yeah, which I'm happy, because he should have a fan base. He should have, you know. And you did the same thing, dude. You went to LA, I fucking hated LA.

Sure. But you seemed to adapt to it. Right. You seemed to, I don't know, I don't know, like, I talked to you out there. I don't know how you liked it. I don't know how you fucking did it. I, my personality could never fly out there,

especially at that time, because I was like, dude, I don't have time to fucking, yeah, I don't have time for phoniness. I don't have time for that shit. But you had a way, you could fucking kind of walk through the bullshit. Yeah, do you think it's, and I never thought about it this way until you said it, but do

you think you were a little too East Coast for the West Coast? Does that make sense? Sure. 100%. 100%. I just, I didn't understand it. I didn't know how, like I remember Soon Lee, I think Soonie, Soon, you know him? Some black comic.

I did a show with him. I did a college with him. And then I saw him. He's like, Hey, what's up, man? I did a, with him. I did a college with him. And then I saw him. He's like, hey, what's up, man? I did a, oh yeah, what's up? Oh yeah. We hit it off, and I was like, cool. To me, okay, great.

So then the next time I saw him. Was it Silly McCullough? Yeah. Something like that? Yeah, okay, yeah. Didn't know me. Yeah. And I was like, yeah, dude.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, cool, how you doing? We had to do the whole thing over again. Okay, yeah dude, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, oh cool, how you doin'? We had to do the whole thing over again. Okay, I get it. And then by the, I think the fourth time, we're at Dublin's, and he leaned over and goes, I'm just sittin' there, I'm not doin' it again.

And then he goes, did we do it? I go, dude, fuck off. He goes, what? I go, you know me. I know you, you know me. That's how fucking life works. If I know you, you know me. I'm not doing this scene with you again. He's like, what? And all the other comedians go like, mad at me? I was like, I'm not playing an acting role with you. We've done it fucking four times, this fucking bullshit. I was like,

fuck off. I remember everybody was mad at me and I was like you mad at me, but that's LA. That was LA to me. They get mad at you for being honest. For being honest, and sometimes it's too honest. Well I think LA's changed a lot. I think LA, that fucking horse shit is kind of gone. More than-

Yeah I agree with that. I think, you know, I went to the comedy store last time I was there right and I didn't see a lot of it. I saw a lot of funny guys right and everybody was cool and people were nice and and it might be where I'm at in the business too where. You're so a lot more established yeah. Maybe I guess you know what I mean but there was a lot I mean dude here's the thing too is hard for me I've always lived I've always been friends with people

that people weren't friends with. Right. You know. Enough about Dane. Jay Davis, sorry. Well I remember, if you're bringing it up, I mean, the whole Dane thing, that was a weird thing for me because I was kind of brokering for you

and brokering for him. Right, right, yeah. That's somebody you came up with. Somebody I came up with, dude. And I'm loyal to a fault. And I remember when you went through all that shit with him, I remember talking to you like, dude, you know, fucking whatever. Yeah. No, you have a great way of breaking things down. Again, to your point earlier of like, you

can be brutally honest and you just read the tea leaves a lot quicker. And the thing is that you do that I think, I think the difference between East Coast and West Coast is like, if we're talking, I just think you're not considerate of emotion. It's like, this is factual. There's no emotions involved. It's cut and dry. So you can bitch about it, but here's the fucking reality.

And so that's why I always called you, I reached out to you for advice. You were a great sounding board to me throughout my whole time in New York because I didn't have that. I would let my emotions get the best of me. Or I would get carried away by the emotion of something instead of like reading brass tacks.

And you had just this reflexive ability. So you lost your hair. Okay, we'll find it again with Himm's hair loss solution. With Himm's you get access to a range of hair loss treatments that work with doctors trusted options and clinical proven ingredients. You can regrow your damn hair in as little as three to six months.

You don't even need insurance to get started. That's awesome. You can do everything from comfort of your own, sorry, you can do everything from the comfort of your own home. Start your free online visit today, hims.com slash ykwd. That's h-i-m-s dot com slash ykwd for your personalized hair loss treatment options. Hims.com slash YKWD. Results vary based on studies of topical or oral,

minoxidil or finasteride. Prescription products require an online consultation with a healthcare provider who will determine if a prescription is appropriate. Restrictions apply, see websites for full details and important safety information. Well, it's funny because you You know, you are a nice guy you you are. Hey, what's up? How's it going? But you're a fucking psycho like Listen dude

Sure, I'm telling you. Yeah, you know if I was gonna go to battle I'd fucking take you. Mm-hmm Cuz you're fucking crazy. You know what I mean? People don't understand. You're a hockey fan. You like to fight. You're not. You're not. You come across as, hey, man, what's going on? But if shit goes down like that was one thing with Dana. I was like, in my head, I'm like, dude, you don't want to do this. You know, in my brain, I'm like, I know that you think that I'm, that don't, when it comes

down to brass tacks, this kid's a fucking, this kid will fight and he likes it. I'll fight your face. Yeah, he's not right. But I think that's also like, that's when you're younger too. Certainly, I mean, I learned to control my emotions and pacify it and understand, you know, it's just taking stock of everything, being like, all right, is this really fucking? Look, I was a psycho too, dude.

I was fucking mentally ill when I came here. I mean, me and you, we had a brother relationship. We would fight and argue and fucking be mad at each other. I mean, I remember, dude, when we went to Iraq, I got a bone to pick with you. I got a bone to pick with you that I've had for years. Oh, is this real right now? Yeah.

Oh, okay. This is not new. It's old. All right. And it's lived with me. And I don't know this, though. You don't. Okay.

What is it? Oh, this is a good one, too. More than Confederacy of Dunces? What was that one? That was the book that Colin recommended we read, and I brought it with me, because I was like, wow, you have an 18 hour flight,

and you were so angry, you're like, you said, dude, why are you trying to steal my friend? I was like, what are you, you said we should read this. He told everybody to read that fucking book. Yeah, it was horrible. It stunk. It stinks. You heard it right here, Quinn.

Yeah. The book sucks. Fucking boo. No, it's not that. OK, what is it? Here it is. Ready? Yeah. So we're in Iraq. Yeah. You going because you're going. My brother's stationed at Camp Victory North. Your brother, your brother was a fucking your brother's

September 11th school. Shit happened, joined the Army. Signed up, yeah, went. Signed up, went. Yeah. And you're like, I'd love to go because of this. Which is fucking crazy amazing, right? So we're going there, we're flying over. We do all these shows.

Okay. We're doing what, two or three shows a day. Yeah, this is the height of the war, 2000, peak war. This is peak. Yeah. Just started getting fucked up. Before we went, you could go to Baghdad, they loved Americans.

This is when the insurgents were coming in, and shit was going bad. And I remember one night, so many stories. So many stories. I remember one night, we're supposed to go to Fallujah. Sunni Triangle. We pull over in a Humvee, waiting for two hours. And they're like, guys, too hot, we can't bring you.

You're going to go to just your gig that you're going to after. You're supposed to go to this gig, but we're gonna bring you to this other gig, Marine Base. Okay. We're taking a Chinook helicopter. Yeah. Nighttime. Nobody... Remember the first day there? It's 120 during the day.

I remember this helicopter ride. I was freezing my ass off. Well, the thing is, Chinook helicopter, open windows, guys with 50 cows, right? Hundred feet over the fucking desert. Nighttime, it's like 30 below. Freezing, but nobody told us. But Quinn, if you look to Quinn, he had a triple fat to his knee, to his ankles.

Parker, like this the whole time. I got my socks tucked into my pants. I'm hugging myself, I'm putting everything over me. Yeah. But the only thing that made me happy is that you had a windbreaker on. It was it was the worst. It's like literally riding in the back of a pickup in Wisconsin in January. I changed. I've never been colder in my life. I changed God's four times.

I was thinking I'm going to Empire Strikes Back you. I was going I'm gonna Empire Strikes Back you I was gonna slice you open like go on the Tonton and like I gotta stay cool in the morning but we got there yeah I remember I'm getting off the plane and I broke my light sticks I had two of them yeah we're 20 miles off the Syrian border right right yeah at a Marine base that had maybe 200 Marines right and I snapped my light sticks and the Marine walked up to me and he goes, put those fucking lights out you fucking shit head with 20 miles off the Syrian border, snipers everywhere,

you wanna get fucking shot? And I just stuck them in my tits. And Quinn walks by and goes, you look like a plane landing a plane. And I remember you laughing and me just wanting to cry. But we went in and we did a show. They were waiting since eight o'clock. It was two in the morning. Plane landing. Plane. Yeah. I remember, remember we did that show. Yeah. Like maybe a hundred Marines sitting down on the floor, no microphone, no stage. We just did our acts and it was one of the best

fucking shows ever. We were doing two to three shows a day. It was like a bombed out kind of building. Bombed out building. And it was horrible. Horrible. It was literally like something you'd see in a horror film but we're like, there's bunked up like special forces guys

and us telling jokes which is fucking crazy. Well I got the crud. You remember that I got real sick? So what happened was in the air, I got a sinus infection, they call it the crud. And what happens, the dust, the sand in the air, and they shit and burn their trash and burn their shit. So that stuff, it's pollution,

all this shit gets in your nose and you get this massive infection. So we're staying at Uday's Palace. Yeah, I do remember you getting sick because you were smoking at the time, coughing constantly. I was dying. I remember that, yeah.

And I had this massive infection, sinus infection, and I remember we were in the Uday's Palace, his, the sun. The suns, in the water palace, where they had the boats and everything. And the two tigers's palace. His, the sun. The suns. Right. In the water palace where they had the boats and everything. Right. And the two tigers and one of them got loose. Well, we showed up.

Yeah. Remember they were like, hey guys, be careful. And we're like, what? And they threw us the vest and the helmets. They go, I don't know, like bullets and bombs. Like, no, no, no. They let the tigers out when we got here. We haven't found the tigers.

And me and you were like, what? What the fuck are you talking about? They let the Tigers out when we got here. We haven't found the Tigers. I mean, you were like, what? What the fuck are you talking about? But I but you remember now, I don't know if you remember this. Do you remember seeing a werewolf? Bobby, what the fuck? OK, we're in the now. We had to go from the plane to a van with curtains. OK, inside the palace.

All of a sudden we stopped short. We stopped short and an animal walked by the front of the thing. It had like a man chest but a wolf head. Do you remember this? And then we went, what the fuck was that? And the guy went, I don't know. I don't remember that.

You don't remember that? No. Buddy, you don't remember that? Colin remembers it. No. And we were like, that was a fucking werewolf. I was probably being ignored. Yeah.

Because I was trailing you guys. You did trail us a lot. Because Steve. It's the rule of threes. Anytime there's three, there's always gonna be the outcast. And as the thing went on, it was like you guys were very, very close.

100%, very close. And I was always kinda like weary, I wouldn't say weary, but like intimidated and insecure. So it just kinda kept my distance from Kong because I never wanted to feel like I was, I know. And he's totally not like that now that I know him. Not at all.

And I wish I was a different person at that time too because here we are in fucking Iraq during the war. And I remember when we met your brother. Which was. Spent the day with us. Was fucking awesome. And the stuff that we did was amazing. Yeah, yeah.

And so one of the last nights, now, you know, I'm a technology guy. Oh, I know. Well, I know, I have a story. All right, let's get to your story after. Okay. Yes, you're a technology guy, yeah. I had latest and greatest.

Yeah. And I had the latest and greatest. And I had this little camera, little thin camera, and it took videos and photos. Like one of the first ones with the screen on it, and it had the little card in it, and you could take these photos. And I was documenting this. I was taking photos and stuff like that.

We did a show in front of, I don't know, 400 soldiers. And, yep don't know, 400 soldiers. And. And. Yep, you know. You fucking know, you piece of shit. You piece of shit. I didn't even know that this would be the result. I want to get to the story. Let me finish the story.

Go ahead, finish the story. I didn't know this was the result. Okay, go ahead. I was taking photos. Right. And there was this beautiful shot. Gorgeous shot, yeah. I mean, 400 soldiers in Iraq during the war,

light coming down. Silhouetting. Silhouetting Colin Quinn on stage and I took this shot. It's like the Ali Ova Frazier shot. Right, right, yeah. That's the shot, like fucking, I got it. Yeah. I took this shot. It's like the Ali Ova Frazier shot. Right, right, yeah. That's the shot, like fucking, I got it. Yeah. I took it.

Yeah. Do you want me to finish it or? Yeah, you fuck, I can't. I can't. So I go, I go, what are you doing? You go, look at this shot, and then you show me the shot. I was like, oh, it's awesome. I had just gotten a digital camera.

Not to the extent of like you did. And I was like, oh, that's pretty cool. And I was like looking at it, I was like, oh, it's awesome. I had just gotten a digital camera, not to the extent of like you did. And I was like, oh, that's pretty cool. And I was like looking at it, I was like, oh, that is a good shot. And I'm snapping away, snapping away. And I just sat back there and I took pictures of everybody, you, Colin, the whole show, right? So why are you looking at me like that?

That's the look Lee Harvey Oswald had before he ripped off three shots from Dealey Plaza. Where's the fucking story? So then I come back. First off, I got you each Cartness cigarettes and I got you each nice lighters. You're fucking great. And I walked over to each of you before we went on our international flight while you guys were eating and ignoring me.

And I walked over by myself. I just said, I said, Hey, I just want to thank you guys very much. I had a great time. Here's a gift. And that was that right? Yep. So I come back, and we're going through all the pictures and I'm like, this is a really cool shot. I should I should just blow this up and frame it. And I'm going to give this as a gift to Colin. And that's that's

exactly what I did. You took my shot. And it's on, it's been on, and will remain on, Colin's wall behind him when I FaceTime him, and I talk to him, there it is, right there, this my shot, and he always goes, fucking, my favorite thing, I love, that's Steve Burns, what a great. Well, I'll do you one better.

You ready for this one? And I know I know you're going to know exactly. You come in one day. You had this awesome leather jacket. Yeah, you got up in a Republic. OK, fucking great. You look great in it, by the way. That's fucking great.

I go, where'd you get that? You go in a Republic. Three days later, I show up. Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!

Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!

Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!

Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! and stammering, the disbelief. And all I could muster up was, yeah, but this is a medium. You go, ah, fuck you, Vines. Buddy, it was, that photo has haunted me. For fucking years. I remember taking that shot going, I got it. I got the trip in a photo. And it's behind, and he praises you for that photo every time, he loves it.

And I'm like, I say to him, I go, that's my photo. He's like, no, no, no, Steve gave me that. Steve gave me that, it's my favorite, it's one of my favorite things I own. This is one of my favorite things of the trip. This is my favorite, OK? So we're in a C-130, which is essentially like you're in the back of eight trailers. OK? And it's literally me, you, Colin, Tracy, Theed and Chris Zimmerman.

OK? Just the five of us. I mean, this thing's fucking massive, huge pay deck. And before we take off, the captain comes comes up to us he goes, Hey, would anybody like to sit in the cockpit? Yep. And we're like, Yeah, that'd be cool. He goes, Why can I take two of you? And con goes, Steve, why don't you join me? I go, Okay. So I get up, get you curling. Like I farted in an elevator. So I go up in the front and Colin and I are sitting there

and the C-130 takes off and this is not a normal plane. I mean, it's a long runway and a long takeoff. And we're going off and all of a sudden, it's like the Millennium Falcon Bay windows. And you're just seeing, boosh, boosh, boosh, boosh, boosh. And I was like, whoa, what the fuck is that? And Colin's like, those are fireworks.

And in my stupid head, I was like, whoa, what the fuck is that? And Colin's like, those are fireworks. And in my stupid head, I'm going, oh my God, they're like celebrating us. They're like, thanks for coming and shooting off fireworks. And the guy goes, the guy goes, we have the headsets on. He goes, no, we're shooting off flares so that the rockets being shot at us don't get us, they go to the flares. And then Colin goes on the speaker and goes, how great would it be?

Colin goes on the thing, and it's only the five of us, only the cockpit can hear these things, right? And Colin's like, how great is it that if we did get shot with a rocket, we would know, but Bobby would be in the back like, what the fuck's going on, dude? And he'd die not knowing what that was happening. Well, I'm gonna tell you what I did. Yeah.

This is what I did. This is my story by myself with fucking Tracy Theed and the Marine next to me. I go, hey man. I go, wow, look at the sun. Dude, can you take a photo of me with the sunset behind me? He goes, that's not the sun. Those are rockets being shot at the plane. And he called me stupid. And

I went, Chris called you stupid. I go rockets. I go have an emotion. I was all by myself. I was going to die by myself. And then I finally did get up to the cocktail by myself. Yeah. We went just back. I was just up there like, I'm up there by myself just trying to ask questions. What's this for? He goes, hang on one sec. I'm like, fuck everybody. I remember though, I remember,

you remember we were outside at the airport doing a show and they were kind of, they were bombing us. Oh yeah. And then Colin was bombing on stage. I mean, you were like, there's two bombings at once. I remember that one time we were in the courtyard and we're performing on the back of a flatbed truck. Yeah.

And because I was the low guy on the totem pole and still would be by the way, if we were to do it today, I had to go first, right? So I went up first. And so they were telling me, it's like, okay, here's the stage and then here's where all the commanders and generals and lieutenants were gonna sit. And he's like, and over there we got that guy

and that guy and that guy. And I was just like, why are there like snipers all over the thing? He goes, well, those snipers are there to watch those snipers over there Because we have all the all the big brass here And I was like shouldn't we go inside like what the fuck are we outside? I'm gonna that was the only time in my life. I was literally performing thinking I'm gonna get fucking shoddy

I was on the roof with the snipers. We really looking he was letting me look through his scope at the other people No way, and I was like, oh, please shoot, Steve. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I mean think about that though. We went to Iraq one of the greatest. I don't know if there's ever been better shows And the the the thanks at the end of those shows were the best things ever I've never received look I love shows. I love the fans. Hey, that was awesome, but you know, I've never received a Stat emotion from those people at when we were done, right? that emotion from those people when we were done. Right. How glad they were to, I mean, do you remember the CD, the DVD I had made?

Full Metal Comedy? Oh yeah, yeah. You remember that? Yeah, I still have it. Do you remember like a bunch of them didn't work? I don't remember that, no. Well, I had, because we did it. I filmed a show at The Cellar,

and I told everybody, we're just gonna film a show at The Cellar, and I told everybody, we're just gonna film a show at The Cellar, I'm gonna edit it, and we're gonna make a full metal comedy, and we're gonna bring it to, I wanted 400 of them. So I remember I went to this company, and I said, hey, I would like this done, and the guy was like, cool, great,

but then he went to his fucking boss, his woke boss, some lady, and she was like, we can't do this. And I'm like, she goes, we don't believe in war. I go, listen, it's not war. I don't care what you buy, fine. I'm bringing this to the soldiers who don't have a choice to be there. It's for their entertainment.

We're going to do shows for them. And she was like, I can't, I can't do that. And good good whatever the bullshit was and I was so fucking hurt and mad by that yeah I want an open Anthony and I didn't say do anything mm-hmm Norton guided me through this he goes yeah don't say anything yeah just say if you don't believe in their views you know whatever you could call them and you know whatever sure well maybe you or maybe you believe in them,

you can let them know that you believe in them. This is their company. Buddy, I remember the lady called me, she goes, can you please stop it? Are you serious? Yeah, fuck them. Well, I mean, look, it's kind of like, you kind of deserve it, to be honest with you,

especially at that time when, especially in New York, post 9-11, like, it's kind of like, you kind of deserve it, to be honest with you, especially at that time when, you know, especially in New York, post 9-11, like we were all part of that. By the way, that was the single, like, seminal moment in my life in terms of my professional career, when 9-11 happened, and all of us, all of us are like, with the aftermath like what the fuck

was that right? The gauntlet of emotions but also like the reality for a bunch of us in our 20s gone. That was fun. I'm gonna have to find something else to do now because there's no fucking way in the world anybody's gonna come to a comedy club to fucking laugh when you can smell like the burning metal and plastic and paper and everything drifting up from lower Manhattan, who the fuck is gonna come? And I remember Estee opened, I think, what was it? Like a week. It was Thursday, that Thursday, that Thursday.

Like boom, we're back up. And we're all like, what? And everybody was tepid. Everybody was like so nervous. And the thing I loved was hearing everybody's perspectives of like, I remember Pete Corielli, like, you know, just like, yeah, my relatives, they want to go see 9-11, the like ground zero.

But it's like, I don't want to go all the way downtown. So it's like I just took to a construction site on 53rd. I'm like, there it is. I'm like, oh my God. You know that bit? He was scared to do that bit at the Boston. Yeah. And he go, I go, dude, I'll do it.

It's so good. I go, I'll do it. Yeah. You gotta do that. He goes, nah, nah, I go, I'll do it. Yeah. So I went up and did it. It fucking killed.

And then he saw it and he's like, you gotta do it. He goes, dude, that's my bit, that's my bit. Yeah. And even like, Meneve saw it and he's like, he's gotta do it. He goes, dude, that's my bit, that's my bit. Yeah. And even like, Manive had a great bit of like, you know, it'd been like five or six days since 9-11. And Russ is like, and now I'm getting calls like six days later from friends. It's like, you do it in the first 24, 49, six days later.

Like, oh, thank God you called. You're the only one, I'm stuck in the rubble. Like all these just thoughts. And every comic had something along the lines of like making that tragedy relatable. And once I saw that, once I was a part of that, I was just like, I'll never be out of work

because this is as bad as it ever gets, ever gets. And that was the greatest lesson I've ever had in comedy. And it was all thanks to Esti, it was all thanks to everybody on those lineups. Those, I mean. Well, the one person got shit. Who was that? One person got shit because they just went up

and did their act. Do you remember that? We were all fucking with them, giving him shit for it. You remember who it was? No. Is this me? No, it's not you, you fucking idiot. I was like, I don't know, because you're looking at me like, who was it? Little guy.

Was it Mitch? Mitch Fattel. Oh, you and Booty? Yeah, Booty. He just went up and did his thing. Oh, he just did his own thing. Didn't mention it, didn't say it, and we were all fucking like, go fuck yourself. Remember that?

And he was like, what? I have my act. Yeah, I remember. And we were like, dude, 3,000 people just died fucking down the street. You're not gonna say anything about it? Yeah. And we were all fucking with him.

Wasn't there the guy that wore the bomb vest under his? Oh no, no, that was Hood. No, because Manny, genius that Manny is, the week after it happened, he had not worked Hood anymore. Hood was like an Arab comic, Iranian, and he had a joke where he had dynamite under his chest, and he would do a joke and be like, ah, whatever. And you know, it would kill, he would kill.

And he actually stopped working the club. He didn't really use them anymore. Right. 9-11 happened that Saturday night. He didn't really use them anymore. Right. 9-11 happened. That Saturday night, he's like, get hood down here. Get him down here, yeah. And we were all like, no, dude, you can't. We all ran downstairs.

Crushed. Crushed it. Crushed it. That's when I knew comedy is the way out of this bullshit. Because if you laugh at it, this is a fucking Arab comic. In New York City, 15 blocks away? Days after talking about blowing the whole place up. And a testament to Manny, and also in some way, it saved comedy from the dry spell of the 80s.

And it made comedy relevant again. Because, I mean, we were, look, we were at The Cellar when it wasn't The Cellar. They were like, literally 50 people on a Friday night. Less sometimes, yeah. And it went from nine to three or two. It was one show. Remember that?

Remember they switched it? It was one show. That was it, you come in and out. People would come in and out, stay the whole night, One show, remember that? Remember they switched it? One, yep. It was one show. That was it, you come in and out. People would come in and out, stay the whole night, whatever the fuck they wanted to do. It was like eight to 11, and then 11 to two. Then they switched it up and made it two shows.

And we were all nervous about that. How are you gonna do that? And then they just did it. Now it's 17 shows on a Friday, crazy. But that was the greatest, I think, education a comic could have, especially back then, because she made us all MC for five to six hours straight. And then if Chappelle came in, you're there for seven, right?

And here's the thing, you had to be funny before or after Chappelle or after Chris Rock. That's why I hated hosting. And comics who bitch about hosting. I'm like, it's the best going up first, learning how to be funny out of the gate. Yeah. And then funny when somebody's really funny. Somebody's when they're not funny. Yeah. And keep that show going. You learn you're fucking battle-hearted. Right. Yeah. It's hosting, especially at the cellar. But it tells you, you gauge you, someone can't tell you the room's not right, someone can tell you the room's hot.

It's only through hosting throughout the course of years for hours and hours you go, okay, I don't need to do as much time or I need to do more time here. I need to, you know, whatever, I gotta give him a good intro. I can't fucking bring up a tell like this. Yeah, I remember when they went to three shows

on a Friday or Saturday, I would be hosting all three shows and I'd wind up, do you ever just wind up doing the same bit, because you forgot? Oh yeah. But I remember, I did that so many, I'd be like, and then just you look, and it would bomb, and I'd be like, I did that, and they're like, you did it. You already did it.

I'm like, all right, sorry. Yeah. I gotta ask you a question, we gotta wrap it up soon, but I gotta ask you a question, because, and I don't know where you're at now with this person in your life, but you connected with probably, I think, one of the funniest, funniest comedian actors to ever,

I don't think he gets enough credit, one of the funniest comedic actors ever, and one of the best actors ever Vince Vaughn sure who I think is as Good as it gets yeah as good as it gets there's nobody who is Can I mean as quick and funny and can go from this? Comedy and be just hilarious and then go over to some serious shit and just blow your fucking brain away

than Vince Vaughn. I think he's probably one of the best. And you became friends with him. Yeah, it's interesting, because I'll never forget this. I became friends with him, and I brought him to the improv one night. Where did you meet him?

I met him. How do you meet fucking Vince Vaughn? So this is what happened, I just moved to. I'm friends with Ryan Hamilton. Yeah. I talked to Danny. I talked to Danny, my producer, more than I talked to anybody. Fuck.

Well, I just moved to LA, and I just passed the store. And Vince was doing a New Year's show at Mandalay Bay. And Sebastian, Ernst, Ahmed Ahmed, they're all doing the show. And one of the guys got sick. I think John Caparola got sick. And Vince is like, well, just give me somebody cool. Get somebody fun and cool that you guys think would be fun to

have. They go, well, this guy, Byrne just moved here. One way asked him, so they reached out and they go, Hey, do you want to do New Year's Eve in Las Vegas? I'm like, yeah, they're like, but Vince, what the fuck? Yeah, fuck. Yeah. So I go. And because I did beat yours, because I did beat yours, I knew how to do a show in Vegas in front of 3000 people. Yeah, I did all those tricks. Yeah. They put me up first. Vince came out. Hello, everybody. Welcome to the Wild West Show. We're going to have a great time tonight. And then he maybe talked for three minutes. He's like, let's get it going. We're going to have a

good time. We're going to introduce first comic Steve Byrne. I go up and just like, pow, pow, pow, just lights out standing ovation. Jennifer Aniston's in the front row and I'm like this is fucking mental thank God for Beatrice right hang on hang on one say yeah can you stop moving stop moving sorry go ahead he uh fucking Christ so he it's like they're not right there But he uh, so then he sees me ever and he's like who the fuck is this guy, right? So I get a call a week later Ahmed and Vince are going to eat lunch And it's like why don't you call burn see if he wants to join us. So we got to lunch We're having a great time at lunch and Vince is exactly the guy in swingers.

He's the guy in crashers. He's exactly how you think he would be. That's how he is, right? And he's just ripping off the lines. And you're just like, god damn, I'd give anything to have that creative output. Like whatever is coming out, like a stock ticker tape, it's like, it's always gold.

It's fucking unbelievable. So we're all just sitting there talking. He's like, I need a fucking trip. I need a trip. Let's go to, it's like, I want to go to Costa Rica. You guys want to go to Costa Rica? Two weeks later, I'm in Costa Rica. And then a meds like getting high, and I don't smoke. And so Vince and I are just hanging out. We hung out for like, six hours that first day, just talking about our lives and bullshitting. And right after

that, we were just like joined at the hip after that. So we just became fast pals. And, and he's he's he's somebody who I never would have accomplished or even contemplated the fact that I'd be able to do any of the things I was able to do without him going 100% you could do this. I remember when he used to hike up the Hollywood sign and he'd ask me about my auditioning and I'm like, I don't know, I'm going out, nothing's working. He's like, you should write something for yourself.

He's like, you, your options are very limited. This is before diversity. Cause you're Asian. Yeah. He's like, he's like, you got no shot. He's like, you got to write something, dude. I was like, I was joking. I didn't know he really said that.

No, like literally. It's like, I mean, how, how, how many opportunities are you going to have? So he's like, you got to write something dude. I was like I was joking. I didn't know he really said no like literally It's like I mean how how many opportunities you're gonna have so he's like you got to write something I was like why never wrote anything before he's like you can do it I was like well, how do I he's like you can do it trust me you can do it if you want to do it I'll do it and so I was like alright, and then I was like, holy shit Vince one things I can write something That's what I'm thinking right right? I went out. I got Save the Cat, I got all these books. And for six months I studied, I learned foundation, and then two months after that, I wrote the script for Sullivan's Son. So about eight months later, I gave him a script,

and he goes, you actually wrote something. I go, yeah, he goes, I'm gonna read this, because I've had this conversation with so many friends that I believe in, that I wanna to support and nobody's ever done it. Wow. You did it. Fuck. And then it was decent enough. Like I go back to it and I'm like, it's fucking garbage.

But there was enough like there there was enough meat on the bone, but the foundation, it was sloppy. But but he he believed enough. And that's how Sullivan's son happened. And then because of Sullivan's son, I learned how to write. And I still like always studied and read everything I could. And then I wrote the opening act. And now I wrote this next one that we're going to make very shortly. And again, like I just would never be in a position looking back without having a friend that was that supportive and like giving that many tailwinds and it's so

interesting like he'll call me at one in the morning because we're both night owls and he's on set with you know great people or whatever and I'm just like well how's the shoot he's like yeah it's okay how are you and he'll just ask me for two hours about it's just like I've never asked you a question yeah has he has he ever mentioned me no I will have the script that I wrote just pass this off cuz I read I brought it I brought him to the cellar quite a few times when was that him I brought him here maybe two years ago god damn you never mentioned my name two nights in a row I brought him here and uh years ago. God damn it, you never mentioned my name? Two nights in a row I brought him here.

You ever like, oh, Bobby's here? Who's Bobby? Well, I was always hoping everybody would be here. And it was like- Well, here's what I love about you, is during all this bullshit, all this woke shit, all this fucking, you never, you fucking stuck to your guns. Yes.

You never fucking cratered. You never, you just stuck to your guns no matter what. And I follow you on Instagram and I watch your shit and I fucking, I love it. I love that you never ever fucking wavered from what you believe in and who you are no matter what the effects of it is. And I saw a lot of people do that shit.

And look, I don't really fucking hate social media. I don't really go on there and say shit. Every time I ever said something was when they were fucking with Brady, when he kissed his son. Right. And I was probably wrong about that because it was a little too long.

Three seconds is a long time to kiss your son. Yeah. But I didn't know I was wrong until I went on a radio show and the guy was like, all right, I'm going to kiss you on the lips as long as Brady kissed his son. And I was like, all right, stop, stop, stop, stop. I was wrong. I was wrong. That is so funny.

But you did, man. And you know, if you're going to step into it, go ahead, do it and you do it. But you do it in a funny way all the time. You're actually trying to be funny. Yeah. And you're fucking you're who you are. I love that you're not a fucking woke. Uh, you never did any of that horse shit when it could affect you in the business. But you, the reason why it's great is because you do, you are one of those guys.

And I'd tell you, you know, I've, you know, I've done certain things and are doing certain things finally in my life where, you know, I, you know, I, to see something through, dude, it's sometimes years, months, years where it's just like, fuck, and to see it through and get to the other side of it is really hard to do. And you've done that a bunch of times. You did it with the movie about Amazing Jonathan. Yeah. You did it with the, first thing you did it,

13, what was it, 13. Tune of Bust, yeah. 13, where you did 13 sets in one night. Yeah. Where I was like, oh, this guy's, you did this shit before anybody was kinda doing this vlogging or making their own content stuff. Yeah, to a degree, but it was also like, oh, this guy's, you did this shit before anybody was kind of doing this vlogging or making their own content stuff. Yeah, to a degree, but it was also like,

look, a lot of like the belief in myself or the truth and honesty in my voice. When I was younger, I definitely didn't have a voice and my voice only came through, I'd say the last maybe seven, eight years where I finally, it finally clicked. You know, it all came together I was serviceable all those years and I was I was good at but now I'm like

I studied writing monologue jokes for four years to do that special the special was the last late night Which was just like it was framed like a late night talk show, right? It got shelved and a lot of the jokes got pulled because of some woke executives at Amazon. It's the hardest, that's the thing that like, is so like dispiriting about the industry prior to the last few years. It's like, you're always, you know, at the beck and call of the gatekeepers.

And that was like one of the last moments. And they're at the beck and call of society, wherever that tends to go. They're like, well, we are this now. Yeah, yeah. Which is, if it's making money, they'll do it. If it's not, they'll back out of it. Right, right.

And that sucks too. Yeah, but I would say, my, the belief in myself only came to fruition because, and I mean this, and I've, I believe I've told you this, I've told Norton this, I've told Burr this, I've told Burr this, I've told Sebastian this. There's literally a handful of guys that I came up with

that I always admired because I was like, God damn, if I could be that honest, like if I could be that honest, it's one thing to be honest on stage, it's another thing to be honest and funny, that's the hardest thing to do. It's hard to do, it's easy to take your fucking shirt off, right, it's easy to be like a spectacle, right?

You know who you're talking about. But you know what I mean though? Like it's easy. Jesus Christ. But you really don't give a fuck. But I don't. Like I think people pay to see Burt. But people don't pay to listen to Burt.

Does that make sense? Like, and I'm not saying, and I love Burt, but Burt's a spectacle. Like he's, he's so unique. He's a Haley's Comet. But I just think that when you can get to that, like, God's honest truth of like, Norton saying stuff about transsexuals, like years ago, before it was like, even commonplace and saying he was attracted to it. And I was like, fuck it, I could be that honest, like, I mean, he was a little too honest, if he asked me, but he was attracted to it and all that. I was like, fuck, I could be that honest. I mean, he was a little too honest if you ask me.

A little too, but he was like, wow. But the fact of, one of my favorite bits of all time of yours was when your father said, I love you for the first time. It's like, that is brutally honest. And that's one of the best bits I've ever heard in my life, like how it affects you emotionally. Now, I don't have that relationship,

but I know exactly what that is, because I know what love is. And for you to communicate that, here's a fracture of love. And this is my definition of love. It's like, that's so brutally honest. That's diary shit. But you guys were able to thread the needle like Burr's been like that from day one. Sebastian's been like that from day one. So my aspiration was always as a comic to be Yeah, you want to be

successful you want to be but I was like, in the back of my head, my my heart, my soul was always like, if I can be that honest. And so it was only until like I started doubling down and doubling down on it that it kind of came. What is this new movie that's coming out? Well real quick I want to say that you introduced me to punchup.live which I it's funny to me because comics are like what is it but they are everybody wants to do what everybody else is doing right instead of going wait a minute this is a this is a company who's saying, I believe in comedy,

free speech, no censorship. You owning the stuff, you having the algorithm, you having the people, those are your people, you should have them, as opposed to Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, where we're just working for them. 100%, yeah, we're creating content and they're receiving the most valuable asset. They're getting it all. All the data.

All the data. And everything, right? And thanks to Danny Frankel and some folks that, you know, had a mutiny out of Facebook, they took some payouts, went over, huge comedy fans have said, this is absolutely an atrocity. We believe in these artists. And so we want to flip it. We want to create a business model where it's like,

you create the content, you get the most valuable asset, you get all the data. And so now it's like you're seeing an insurmountable amount of data. You could go to like, it's like metadata, it gets really granular. And so he's, and it's growing and it's growing. And it's always evolving.

They just come out with the app where you can send your emails out, find out who likes you, where they like you. I don't understand why comics are so scared of, they're so petrified of not being YouTube famous. It's like, buddy, it will happen, but you, you're gonna, it's gonna die. And they get to choose, there's somebody somewhere

is choosing what's good and what's bad. Well, YouTube is 100% suppressing speech. It's 100% suppressing jokes, levity. There's trigger words in there. And it's like, literally that person's like, that's not funny. But it's not, no, saying that, I don't even give a shit, that's YouTube, right?

My special, I just put kill, we had it on Punch-Up for a year. Right. And I got all the data and all that. And then I was like, all right, let's put it on YouTube. Right. And you could see it pop off and then somebody, something just shut the valve off.

Exactly. All you need is one person to complain about it. That's it. I lost my TikTok account because I'm like literally mentioning trigger words, but they're done under the guise of a joke, right? I mean, it's so apparent it's a joke, but they shut it down. But I think punch-Up is becoming,

there's like this middle ground. It's like, right? There's Netflix, which is like Tastemakers. It's Broadway and Park Place. And then there's YouTube is the other alternative. And then in between is like these other streamers that are serviceable, right? But they're not great.

And so the industry itself, because I've been privy to so many of these calls and you know, in on the information everything, they're looking for a new piece of real estate. And over the last year and a half, you got Larry David, Segura, you, all the comics and it's like, it's slowly building its own community. And what's happening is, is that if you're on any of these social sites, right? Great. OK. Well, they're coming to see you.

And then they're going to see their favorite band, and they're going to see people they follow. But if you get a punch up, it's like this hub, and there's all these spokes. And now because of punch, you're exposed to all the spokes. Literally, if you like X, you might like Y and Z. So it's becoming this symbiotic comedy environment where everybody's going to be able to help each other share data

eventually and then it's you're gonna be able to sell your own tickets by the way as well so I want to put a special up there I'm I believe I'm putting my new special up and I think what happened with Hulu where Hulu just announced like 12 comics 12 months months, whatever. They just had a big party, whatever. I think Punch-Up is gearing up to do the same. They're gonna find those comics that kind of fall through the cracks that have a lot of gravity

and glum them all together and go, okay, you, you, you, you, do you guys wanna form a super group and let's put together a bunch of our specials and we're gonna launch it in the same way, form, and fashion, but no restrictions. No restrictions. Nobody's saying, don't say this, as long as it's funny. Exactly. Trying to be funny. You say whatever the fuck you want and know some chick or some guy, whoever it is, choosing what the fuck is funny or not. And you get the data. And you get the data. You get the data which is to me is fucking key because everybody who goes on my punch up is a fan.

And I can fuck I can contact them. You have direct access. Because instead I'm coming to Cleveland fuck I gotta buy an ad I gotta take out a boost I gotta do this thing. And then you you put a little picture up that's gonna get no traction because it's gonna get lost in the algorithm. It's like, punch up. It's like, oh, I can see I have 133 bands in Cleveland.

I got 933 in California. It's like, I know exactly how many people, and I know exactly where they are. So I could get on the rabbit hole on it, but it is truly, I think, a disruptor in the industry. And there's some agents and managers that understand there's a future to be had with this. And there's others that are very, very scared.

Yeah, I don't know why. It's like you're fucking dumb because you're gonna, now you're gonna, like YouTube, the guys who blew it, you're gonna be one of those guys, you're like, I gotta do fucking, you know what I mean? And I'm one of those guys. Sure, yeah. I'm one of those guys, you know what I mean? But I think I'm taking my old special,

Life in the Village Underground, putting that on Punch-Up, and then I think my next special I wanna put on Punch-Up. I'd rather, hey, okay, not three million people see it, but 5,000 people see it. Those are my fans. The right 5,000 people. How many people do you need? I want you to come to my show. The right 5,000 people are gonna see it. How many people do you need?

I want you to come to my show. I want you to see me live. Right, you use Punch-Up to make a living, you use social media to grow, right? So you're gonna expose yourself, you're gonna expose yourself to new people through socials, but you're absolutely gonna get the exposure on Punch-Up as well.

And my new special, I believe, is gonna go there as well because- What's the new special? It's gonna be called Violent Moderate because I think I'm a centrist. I'm right down the middle. And for example, I'm talking about like the trans debate and I'm talking about as a father because my kids are 12 and 9 and they're right in the wheelhouse. They're like receiving information that's being permeated in schools and education and society and TikTok whatever and so like addressing something like that addressing Asian hate where it's like

why did Asian hate fall out of the zeitgeist why to fall out of the news cycle it's like because it's black people beating the shit out of Asians but you can't do that because Asian hate only exists because it dovetailed BLM right so it's like it's racist to say that they're doing it when it's like, it becomes this conundrum. So it's addressing all these topics. And I've had my reps going, I don't know where we're going to take this.

I'm like, well, I know where we're going to take it. It's someplace where it's going to be safe and can be seen because it's comedy and not worrying about executives going, OK, well, there's some trigger words in here. Or it's all that stuff. And that's what I dealt on the last one too. And I'm trying to be a centrist, by the way, I'm trying to be moderate.

I'm trying to like swing the pendulum back and forth. Because so many late night talk shows are so one side and that was the whole point of last late night was to be something right down the middle. I'll wet your beak here and I'll wet your beak there. And then they neutered the monologue section by taking out all the jokes that ridicule the left and kept the ones in that ridicule the left. Who did that? Amazon.

And by the way, they said, oh, we're gonna give you all this real estate, we're gonna launch it. As soon as it came out, it was completely buried. They wasn't even on a new release, not even on the homepage. They were so pissed off at me. And I didn't even do anything, I just wrote jokes. And they said, we don't like this. No, it's not. But they were contracted

to put it up, right? But there were 12 jokes that got taken out and it skewed, totally skewed it and then became exactly what's on late night talk shows. It was so infuriating. Yeah, that sucks. Well, dude, listen, we've been talking for a while. I got questions from the fans. We're going to go to the Patreon. Make sure you go to PunchUp.live slash Robert Kelly for all my dates. Of course, YouTube, I got all my standup up there and on PunchUp. Make sure... I'm going to be all over the place. Kansas City.

I'm everywhere. I love that club. Yeah, Kansas City Club, Batavia, Illinois. Comedy Vault. Yeah, Comedy Vault, I'm everywhere. Yeah, Kansas City Club, Batavia, Illinois, I'm gonna be. Comedy Vault. Yeah, Comedy Vault, Levittown, and then I'm going to Naples. I think Louie's opening for me in Naples.

Opening? Yeah. Can you, I don't even know the last time I run into Louie, except the one time we were on a sidewalk one time. Yeah. Could you just tell him I apologize? I should just apologize to him. But there was one time.

He's downstairs right now. Is he really? You're going to apologize. I will. For what? There was one. Just like you have these stupid grudges when you're younger, right?

Yeah. And I remember I was in DC doing the DC improv, and he was out jogging. He's like doing a theater. And he's running. And I go, hey, what's up, Louie? And he just kept running. And I go, Louie.

And he just ran past me. And I know he saw me. He saw me. And I've seen him all the time at the cellar. But whenever he'd come in the cellar, he was always kind of like standoffish at the time, whatever. And I was just like, fuck that guy.

And so I hadn't seen him since, because I was not in New York when all this stuff happened ever. And I ran into him out on the sidewalk with you. He was like, hey. And I was like, no, you ignored me. I'm going to fucking ignore you. So I was just like, hey, Bobby, good to see you, whatever. You ignored Louie?

I completely ignored Louie in stone face, just like I was looking at you, looking at you, and I walked away. And I was just like, it's really fucking immature Steve you're so stupid yeah it's like maybe he had to take a shit maybe he was on the phone maybe he's listened to something I don't know but I was like I'll tell you what it is I know what it is he doesn't think I'm telling you the story about this on a calm Derek was getting his haircut at the barber, and the guy was like, oh, I'm a big fan of Louis.

You know Louis? He's like, I brought him up, I know him, he brought him up as a host at the cellar one night. Right then, Louis walked in, and the guy was like, Louis! And the guy was like, hey Louis! Derek, the comic was like, hey Louis! Louis just walked out, just turned around and left. Because he gets, you never know.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And he's just, you know what I mean? There's so much on him, Louis, Louis, Louis, that he just fucking eliminates it, because he doesn't know it's you. 100%, he's running and it's just like, I get it, you're exercising. And I was just, it's something I took in

and burned in the hard drive in my 30s, late 30s, and it's like here I am 50, like no man, hey man, you were fucking around, fuck you dude, and it's like it's so stupid. And as soon as it happened I just felt so icky and gross and I was like you fucking dipshit, how old are you? Be funny if you tell him and then he goes and he just walks away. All right listen, Steve, where can people check you out?

Punch Up, Punch Up Steve, yeah, there I am. Punch Up Steve? Punch Up Live, Steve Byrne, there we go, there I am. There you go, you're gonna be in Brookfield. Milwaukee, Wisconsin at the Milwaukee Improv. I have a residency at Jimmy Kimmel's, I do a show every two weeks at Jimmy Kimmel's where we pretend it's New Year's Eve, So every show you come in.

That's cool. It's like we do. Funny that you're friends with Jimmy. I think that you wouldn't be. I'm not really friends with him. The club just books me. Okay. Yeah.

He's fucking left. He's very left, yeah. And I don't care if somebody's left or right. I just wanna do my shit, you know? Yeah. So. They do. Make sure you check out punchup.live

Steve Burr slash Steve Burr, what is it? Slash Steve Burns, right? Slash Steve Burns. Slash Steve Burns, you gotta see him. Check out his, he's got the Champagne of Comedy, the opening act, he's got Amazon, he's got the amazing Jonathan, great movie by the way. Which we're gonna feature.

Fucking loved it, great movie. And is he alive? Passed away. He's gone. You know, before he died, one of his favorite comics is Bill Burr, and he never met Bill. So I went over to see him maybe four days before he passed.

And I told Burr, hey, can I FaceTime you with Jonathan? He'd love to meet you. He's really kinda coming towards the end.. Where's like, of course, of course Sorry, I get bill on their facetime at each other and bill just goes Jonathan I can't tell you how awesome it is your big inspiration. I love watching your thing I just I just gotta say man. I just feel so sorry for you and Jonathan's don't feel sorry for me It's gonna happen us all and bills like no not that's like, here you are dying, and the last comic you're going to see is Steve Byrne.

Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. Ah, that's great. Yeah, check out all his, you got a podcast with Joe Gatto. You're also on the tour with them too, right? You do a show with him. Do you have to be clean? Joe wants you to be clean. But I, you know, there's times we go out together,

because we do the Too Cool Moms podcast together, probably hard, but every now and then, but not as much as we used to, yeah. Right, okay. All right, well check him out. One of the funniest guys in the biz, a friend of mine, and fucking great. I'm so glad you came on. No, thanks, Bobby. Guys, what do you got? You can follow me on Instagram at Danny Braff and see me at the Dojo of Comedy February 7th in Northland, New Jersey. Have you played the Dojo yet? No.

You got to play the Dojo. It's the fucking best club in Jersey. Best club in Jersey. I mean, just fucking murderous. So good. That one. It's funny because I got Vinny Brand right here. Yeah. Well, throw that number out and go to the dojo.

I'll go to Uncle Vinny's. Go ahead. What else you got? You like Swiss cheese, cheddar, feta guys. I got a cheese show on YouTube. Just type in cheese show. Joe Russell, that's the first thing that comes up. Check it out. Because it's the only one. Nobody else does a cheese show, Joe. What else you got? You can

follow me on Instagram at Zach Granlim and I'm headlining on Thursday the 30th 10 p.m. St. Mark's come see me be swell. Are you guys making clubs up by the way? No no okay that's what they work. The swell. The swell. OK. No, it's going to be swell. It's going to be it's it's going to be so when he says headlining last, he's going up last. Got you. All right, guys, you're the best fans of the world. Thank you for listening. Hope you enjoyed the podcast. Subscribe, review all that jazz.

And if you really want to support the show, Patreon dot com slash Robert Kelly, we'll see you guys next time on You Know What, we'll go to the questions now on patreon so if you want to listen to the questions or ask them go and join we'll see you guys next time bye