Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - YKWD #590 | Mike Cannon, Mike Feeney, Brendan Sagalow | The Boys Return

Episode Date: June 8, 2025

They boys return and watch a gay scene from an indie film Sagalow was in. Get the EXTRA YKWD, Watch LIVE and UNEDITED AT https://www.patreon.com/robertkelly LIVE FROM THE SHED AND MORE ON PATREON DUDE!!! https://twitter.com/robertkelly https://twitter.com/YKWDpodcast http://instagram.com/ykwdudepodcast https://www.facebook.com/YkwdPodcast/Support the show and get 40% off your Ridge order. Head tohttps://www.ridge.com/DUDE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Yeah, baby, we're starting the podcast right now. We're back. You know what, dude? Live. Welcome, everybody to the show. YKWD. I started a social media podcast. The YKWD podcast. YKWD is back again. Old school, back in the day where it all started before them all. YKWD.

This podcast is so fun and crazy. It has no rules. God, how are you I'm ruining this. Where's the bar banner, man? Sorry, it's a comedy podcast. This isn't NPR. That's what this podcast does. Is there any better show?

This is the original. Original. If your dad is still walking around with a wall that as thick as a paperback, it's time to get him an upgrade. Right now, this Father's Day, snag him a Ridge Wallet. The Ridge Wallet is the sleek, minimalistic wallet that holds up to 12 cards and cash without adding an ounce of unnecessary bulk. His back pocket will thank you man. I'm telling you,

crafted from premium materials like carbon fiber, titanium, and stainless steel. God bless America. It even comes with a lifetime warranty. So it's truly, it lasts forever. It's the last forever wallet. It is awesome because it keeps your cards, it keeps everything in a slim, tiny pocket and you don't have to deal with it. And that little money case, I can throw like 20s in there. Always like to have a couple bucks on me, a couple double berries along with my wallet. They come in and out nice and easy with over 50 colors and styles available. No matter dad's style, there's a Ridge wallet for him right now

just in time for father's day this is a perfect gift right now just in time his father's day Ridge is having a huge sale get 40% off your order at ridge.com dude just head to ridge.com dude to find the perfect gift for dad or yourself. Support the show and tell them we sent ya. Give Dad the upgrade he deserves this year. Come on, yeah, what's up everybody? It's Robert Kelly, we're back at the Comedy Cellar studios above the world famous Comedy Cellar with another episode of Wide KWD.

And this is an episode that I haven't had in a long time. I miss these three fucking pieces of shit and I feel like they haven't been, yep, you, that's right, that's how it would term, it's term of endearment, you fucking. Yeah, I took it that way. Of course you did. And haven't spoken yet.

Thank you. Yeah, but you did, you did, you feeny. I'm adding to the show. I'm the guy with the head shakes, that's how I punctuate on a flight. Oh, I apologize, that's your thing. Yeah, that is his thing. Yeah, but he's got a little frip.

I'm all eyebrows and head bobs he's got a little flippy hair things if I'm gonna I'm an over-exaggerated by exaggerate this is the podcast somebody used to be the my fucking I leave the rate wake early what was it called I by Irish goodbye podcast do that I leave the wake early Then we had another podcast that is now a popular segment on your podcast What is it? It was called? Here's the scenario where we posed Hypotheticals to each other and now that's just something guys do on the reg You bring hypotheticals that I bet everybody hates it too. What is it? It's the internet's least favorite game.

I'll be honest with you. I don't even fucking listen to the regs when I'm on it. It's just Louis going, you're fat, you're fuc- what do we got now? What do we do? I don't even know. What is it? You know, you pose a hypothetical. I understand what that is, but we do that? You do. Yeah. yeah or you have at least I'm a fan I listen every episode we'll send it to each other every time you do so it's definitely been a cloud let's just get to it yeah let's just girlfriend in her mom's body what's your favorite fish? If you were an igloo. Oh yeah. And the sun came out, would you be scared? Who came up with that? Who brought it up on the regs? That can't be. I don't know. You guys did make it a clip though. It has to be Lewis. Lewis probably. I think it was Joe probably. Joe? Maybe Joe Lewis. maybe or you I think we're getting away wasn't yeah yeah you're

getting we're getting into the weed section your honor not crime so you guys part that you guys are bringing the podcast back yeah this is the announcement Mike's from laugh button walks out trips fall Look at this pie chart I Check my wallet. I've lost money. I loved pie. He's like guys We got to get you back on the network and no I won't answer a single email There was a pandemic when everybody was in front of their computer. When 100% of work was done digitally. Wow. It's like in shots.

Guys, how have you been, man? I haven't seen you guys together. I mean, you got your own thing going on. You have a podcast with Andy. I sure do. You have, well, you guys have stuff going on He was the first one stuff. Yeah, he's right into it. Yeah, you know what's talking about you her pants You get a good one on him. You always get a stick up

But I turn on yeah, sorry watching it hit by a truck, but we got friends here I don't want you and nobody told. Yeah. Wait a minute. Isn't that that show where you do it and it blows you up? Yeah. It changes everybody's life. Anytime we do anything. Why? Why do you have to be in on this? Because I was on the same taping and it's also as soon as I enter into anybody's domain, it's like, do you want this to just go down? Yeah. You really didn't kill my network. I mean, there's not a show left on this down? Yeah, you really didn't kill my network. I

Mean there's not a show left on this thing. Yeah, dude. Good luck with your new walls that works a strong word for you guys Yeah, it's over. I mean laugh, but I don't know if they're around no Or at least that's what they told us Dated you made them go back to music. Yeah Hey, we're gonna go back to music. Yeah. Hey, we're going to go back to indie bands. So you did this Don't Tell thing. Yeah. Both of you guys did it. It's supposed to you do it and they put it out there. You own it.

Yeah. They give it to you, but they put it out there and they have so many fans that it's... They have a big platform. I mean, you're just famous. You could be, yeah. You could be. Yeah. What do you think? Or you could be me who did it and nobody saw it. Nobody saw it. Aw. People saw it. They liked it. Yeah

they did like it. I thought it was a very solid set. I'm a slow build. I'm a slow build. You're a slow build? I remember watching. I'm a slow build. I'm a slow walk. I'm a slow learner. Slow metabolism. Slow yeah. Slow metabolism is person. Yeah. A metabolism. I'm just slow, yeah. I saw metabolism as a go-in. That's not coming from you, but it was a go-in. Red did try to say metabolism in a crunch. Oh, it made me laugh. He goes, oh, I'm a tattin'.

What? What did he do? I went, oh, I'm a tattin'. I'm a tattin'. Metabolism. You're such a fuck. Thank you, buddy. Yeah.

Appreciate it. What's that? Power bars to get you through. No, I haven't. I've been going all day. I've been going since six. No kidding. What are you just going off to the tiny house for four months? You just your batch recording. Yeah. Get the fuck out of here. It's going to do is woods reset. Don't get mad at me because you don't have a wood. I would love a wood reset.

I love a wood reset. Yeah, you would. And you don't have a. reset. I have a woods reset. I love a woods reset. Yeah, you would and you don't have one. Maybe I would have invited you to the woods, you would have had a reset this summer, but now you're not coming. I might walk out into the woods and give my wife a reset. Wow. Yeah, I might walk into the woods, give my life a reset and just keep going. Wait, I guess that doesn't make any sense. That's what I meant.

Jesus Christ. Sorry. When we record, I'll be funny. Buddy, it's been off for... Now I'll do my big Feeny react. Dude, I do not love Sagalow. Let me ask you a question. Did you guys ever think of doing a Three Stooges reenactment movie?

You think so? Yes. You be Mo. I know you want to be Mo, but you can so yes yeah you be mo you be I know you want to be mo but you can't you're Larry and you're curly I always saw myself more as a shamp nope what are you gonna do we were just talking about how we could write a really good mafia movie yeah I feel like anybody everybody's are in you and that works well what were you guys being it though not Italian no I wait we're just writing it yeah. No, we're just writing it

Yeah, we're more we're more writing it. We're more Cohen brother. Yeah, we're thinking. Oh, we're not in it I don't I've maybe a small bit probably like I'm a good act. Yeah What about fucking Mike he's good at and he's a great actor. Yeah. Yeah, they're they're good actors. What are you? You great actors what do you you great great short where he plays he's in a he's in a gay relationship he lays in bed with a guy he makes out with him and it's never seen the light of day wait a minute what the fuck just said you made out with a dude on a short He made out with a dude and then they started taping and then they did it. Did you say taping or dating? Taping. He was taping up my body to sexually...

Where is this? It's somewhere, but I don't know where it is. Where is it? It's on his lap, Kyle. You motherfucker. I know you have it. I don't have it. Yeah, you did, because we were going to watch it together.

I forgot the dude's name. We were going to watch it and he ended a podcast first. I mean, I could look for it. Yes. Find it. Anyways. Vapap vape. What do they call it? Vam. Vam. Vam. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. Vap. that is? FAP, FAP, FAP. Is that real? That's how I've come to. FAP, FAP, FAP by the way, sounds like the driest of working on. That's what it means, right?

FAP, FAP, FAP. FAP, FAP, FAP. Yeah. Well that's because the FAP-ening, the great FAP-ening, which I still remember where I was. I was down in fucking Maryland Ocean City and the Jennifer Lawrence video.

Is that lube? Lube? FAP, there it is. That's a sponsor, I suppose. Brendan's now a part of. I love when Danny gets inspired. He just ran over and, oh, they said FAP. I've seen this. He put it to... So FAP. I found it. You found it? Yeah.

Please send it to Danny. Okay. How do I do this? Send it to Danny. What's Danny's email? Danny, say your phone number. Give the phone to Danny. Okay. phone the phone to Danny, okay? I'll send it to the group chat. Oh my god. I'm fucking excited about this ding Don't have a touch the bell

You were like a sassy hotel manager The other way I'm the I'm the angry patient. What if I signed an NDA the guests I go hello Ding ding. That's not a good ding well. What if I signed an NDA and I'm going to get in trouble for this? What? Did you sign an NDA? I don't know. No, it's online, you said.

It's a short film. No, I mean it's password protected in this thing. Is it short film? It was years ago. Yeah, dude. They're going to be happy. It was a student too. Oh, fuck them.

You signed an NDA with a student? Yeah, dude, you're not they're gonna be it was student too. Like it was like You signed it any day with a student Who is the student His name was Marty Scorsese Scorsese Scorsese No, I don't know he hit me up cuz he saw me doing stand-up or something right and he's right make out with you He liked Brendan in the Drew Perry show he didn't know I was a woman until he got my name I mean a man fuck I did want to say this here's me what what we gonna say you wanted to say

you said you wanted to say it no I was trying to get past the bomb. You were about to come out and you were like, I forgot what I was gonna say. You can have that. Don't even think about putting it in your pocket. Take it home. It's too much lube. For who? For Diddy. It's too much for anybody. I'll take that.

No, I'm taking it. We're not gonna watch.... How long is it? Hey look, I'm one of the top credits. That's pretty sweet. Of course you are. That is cool. How long is it? I don't know.

We can just go to my scenes and stuff. That's what I'm saying. Is it three minutes or is it 40 minutes? I can't believe you got the room sheltered with Cassandra Portillo. The whole thing's 15 minutes. It's 15 minutes. Okay. It's a little long.

You can go to my scenes. Well let's go to his scenes. You can go to my scene. Well, let's go to his. You go to my scene. Skim to Brendan's scene. Let's go to your. It looks pretty good, though. That way. Also, you're better. I'm better. I've watched it. Yeah. All right. This is the first time you've watched.

Yeah, you are. There he is. There he is. Wow. What an actor you are. You are. Oh, Brendan, look at this. You look great. You lost weight for this. You got hair. I was probably skin way skinnier here, too. So that's going to be a little shock. This is post pandemic. Yeah, great. You lost weight. You got probably skin way skinnier here, too So that's gonna remember what you did a little shock. This is post-pandemic. Yeah, we did it in Boston areas Is that him? Oh, yeah, I'm in this little sweet boy. Where where where where is that? That's his silhouette

Yeah, it's a silhouette. Can't see shit here. Oh Shut up. I look good. You do look Let's hear it. Why is Danny in the scene with you? Why do you have to kiss that? I wasn't kissing any guy. Oh, no. I didn't kiss a guy. I thought you kissed a guy. Yo, Brendan naturally having his hand like this. Wait, go back. Doing a hard list. What did I do? Your little mannerisms. You really got into it. Are you blowing him in that? Look, look at your hands. Oh yeah, I'm a good actor, you fucker. You're a good gay guy. Now wait a minute, you said you made out with a guy. I didn't make out with any guy.

It's somewhere in the end when they're in bed. Did you make out with somebody? I am in bed with a guy. Do you sleep with him? Well no. Fake mimic sex. He wanted me to take my shirt off and I said no. Is this your boyfriend?

Yeah, I'm supposed to be this guy's boyfriend. Oh, really? You really do look like a young James Corden though. Is this a horror movie? Like a sweet boy. It's kind of like this weird thing that I think actually happened to the director. Why why is he like a silly? I go, go, go, go. The lighting, the lighting is fucking nuts, dude. But unless it's supposed

to be on purpose, like it's a horror movie. Like he does full silhouette. It's a good choice. His family was also very, wait a minute. Did you say maybe? Do you know what the fuck you did? What is it a horror movie? It's like a thrillery Independent, do you die movie? I mean it does have that green tone like seven does how many thrills can you have in 15? It's not even supposed to be a thriller. It's just like an independent thing that I really wish you suck his dick right here Man, this is bad acting here Hold on run it back on it you gotta run back I'm like oh yeah okay they like me

What? That picture of you? That's weird. That's a weird shot. David by Jasmine. Okay. Who's that? Oh. Whoa. He was with a chick. Look at that little rolls in the back of your head. I know. I really do look like a fucking dog. I have a pug's head. Your mom comes over, picks you up with her mouth.

Is that a scruff? Yeah, I'm scruff. Are you going to lie next to this guy? Yeah, dude. I got to pug's head. Your mom comes over, picks you up with her mouth. Is that a scruff? Yeah, I'm scruff. Are you going to lie next to this guy? Yeah, dude, I got to cuddle him. Oh, did you put your dog? Oh! Oh! Oh!

Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop! He's racing us back! Stop, stop, stop! He's racing us! Go back, go back, go back, go back, go back, go back. Oh my god, wait, wait, wait, wait. Oh! Oh!

Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh back oh my god this little piggy went to the things I would do for art this is such an amazing insight into what you think is intimate also I'm like yeah I'm like doing the Brittany Murphy I'll never tell you're you're almost homophobically touching I know did you see that little coy smile look at his coat ready well that's acting buddy hang on one second ready watch during the watch this little smoke look watch here comes no listen listen Listen. He he he he. He he he he. Dude, you gotta pause that and put that image on a t-shirt. That is unreal. Can we have sound on that?

I wanna hear. What is he saying that I'm falling so in love with? Here we go, ready, here we go. He he. Oh my. Oh my God. Shut up homophobes. We're not homophobes, this a homophobes love. I love this

I'm not homophobic, but I am like anti you too as a couple No, I actually yes, I do he's throwing me off. Yeah, he's throwing this is a good actor No, you're adorable. He's too hairy for you. Mm-hmm, right? He's got different. Oh wait. Yeah Please make out never happened boy did you kiss him no oh god um so what do you is this a story of his life do you want to know what the story is? Nope. Don't spoil it. Wait, wait, wait. That mocking voice. I love how this is just so clear. Look at him.

Look at him just turn straight. Look at just his eyebrows. I'm like, what am I doing? I go, I hope I never showed up. I hate to see that. Fuck. I'm so gay. At least your co-star spent the month

leading up to this not sleeping. Why does he look like the guy from Ghost on the train platform picking the fucking Pepsi can? He does look rather sick. She's actually pretty. Yeah, she's good looking. Wow. I feel like I'm at the movies now with you eating that fucking chocolate bar

I don't throw this in my face cuz I haven't eaten. I'm gonna pass out chew it on Mike. Everyone loves it. Okay So you think we'll see more so this guy's having this guy's having a crisis of sexuality where he's well I'll tell you what the story is once it's done Well, we're gonna watch the rest of this Wait for the after credit. Yeah. credits. Samuel Jackson turns me into a superhero. Gay man! With the power of his finger to correct! He shows up in married guys' houses. You're not wearing that. You're wearing this.

That doesn't match. Game in! Is that you touching his upper thigh? I fucking wish. I wish that was me. Would you remember your last scene in the movie? That might have been it, I think. The bed scene? So you want to know the story of this thing? Yeah more than anything we do so apparently

You were desperate for a part Yeah, suck this guy's dick I actually did pretty well in that I should I should look good, but it would be awesome. You know what? It was that I should uh I should uh it look good but it would be awesome you know what it was very good I just came so the story goes this is the story were you guys wearing mics yeah it sounded very low I don't know there was like a boom there's a yeah it was a big boom right in the guy's ass. Boom goes the dynamite. This guy was thinking of dead babies the whole time. You know, fill it up and stick it into his hairy ass. Yeah, finish your chocolate bar.

Well, that's a thing. Oh! Wow. Now he can't even rebut. Yeah. This entire. Yeah, dude, you need water to rebut? Somebody's getting sassy.

This entire thing of lube wouldn't even get you through that brier patch of ass hair that guy had like a fucking pure protective knot they put a sailor rope so the story is he this guy gay guy is bringing his boyfriend mm-hmm your boy your boy, home to meet his parents. They're going through old photos, and he recognizes something that this girl

that he dated when he was in high school drew for him, and he goes back and he remembers a time where... He was not gay and life was easier. It was something, no, it was something about him being more in love with this guy that was at the party or something. And then I actually forgot the ending of this, so... What? It's only a ten minute movie.

And you're in it. You're one of the stars. You're on the main credits. You just wanted to gay off on film. This is what I want. Brendan wanted to stretch himself when he's never acted as a normal person. He certainly did stretch himself. He wanted me to take my shirt, like have my shirt off in that scene. And you also just realized I said act as a normal person. Act like a normal boy.

You put your foot down. Yeah, I went, no. It was the first time I said no to that. Isn't it weird they always want fat dudes to take their shirts off? I don't, it's like a fetish for them. It's a thing, it's like a black median in a dress. They're trying to get you shirtless. It's a thing it's a vulnerability. It's like a black comedian in a dress. Yeah, they're trying to get you shirtless. It's true. Same thing. They always want that. Same thing. Keep you down. That's some deep shit right there.

So he remembers this old thing that's giving him anxiety as he... AIDS? I'm definitely gonna call him. Dude, you you take that down man fuck that guy called me up he's really angry fuck you know fucking way dude looks like a great movie yeah yeah this will be copyright struck immediately so I don't think that's seen the light of day. You're right about the no light. Hey, you started the fist bump. Don't fucking act like I reached out. I was doing your fucking head bump. And they're calling me ba ba ba.

What? That's the Nicki Minaj song. The OB said they're calling you ba ba ba. So they go to a party and you remember You didn't love this scene. How many I didn't know they were filming I want to do it again. I don't this didn't work for me. I gotta go. I gotta go more Did you try like different techniques to try out by the third time? I was like, oh, so it was finger the whole time I was doing it made that creative choice on the train ride up.

In the cat-sentiment. Yeah, wait a minute. I got to know. I got to know, because we've all acted. We've all been in stuff. But there are things that you're like, I'm going to try this. I'm a little business.

They call it the business, right? Yeah. What made you choose that for your business? Did they tell you to do that, or did that come from inside of you? I think the director told me to do something like that. The director said what? Either he said, can you caress him or something or he said, can you give him a thing? A what? They called it a thing? They went, mm, give him, he was going, stop trying to jerk him off. And I went, okay,

I'll do this. And he went, no, no, no. No, no, no. And he's like, yes, hold it. Were you went no no no. No no no. He's like yes hold it like this. Were you body against body or were you TP'd out? We were pretty much cuddling. Did you get hurt? No kidding. No. You didn't put a lot of the op. You had a pillow buffer. You felt it. Buddy when I did Law and Order they had me with this smoke and my wife was a black chick she was a hot black chick and I forgot to wear like tidy

whiteies under my boxers. I said boxers with the little slice dude. I was on a blackjack and I forgot to wear like tighty-whities under my boxers. I said boxers with the little slice. Dude, I was feeling, I was so, and I had to get up and like jump out of the bed and get a gun. Like something happens, I jump up. But I'm like, dude, I'm gonna get up, my fucking stomach is gonna just stick out through my thing.

So I rolled, I just rolled over. I went, I'm just gonna go this way. He goes, no, you guys are cuddling. It was like a French, you love each other. I go, we're married? He goes, yes. I go, we're not fucking cuddling. I score, she hates me, I'm this way, she's that way.

That's love. You know, oh, this makes sense. I was like, thank God, because I got a six and a half inch that was gonna stick out of that, disappoint everybody. With loose boxers. Yeah, oh.

The scene happens, he goes, that's cut, that was great. And for the next one, put the penis away. Okay, there we go again. We only need to wind the gun, not do a lot. Cacosa with the penis, cacosa. Anywho, so, cacosa. Cacosa. Cacosa.

What does that mean in Italian, like what the fuck or something? Means Bateo Lane. Cacosa, cacosa. So. I love that he means but a lane so I didn't know what it meant I just I wasn't making fun of it I just didn't know I hate new dad supportive of all my friends it makes me sick you potted I forgot about you there's a empathy using through. I hope you choke on empathy Speaking of oozing through somebody. I so my what my movie. Yeah, how many times you do this before it got weird?

It was weird of almost instantly really I mean you look like you got your it was a very tangled in his arm hair Did he it was a very supportive? Group of people you know what I mean? It was a very supportive crew. No one was like, it's not like you guys were there being like, oh, oh. Were they? Were they gay? The director was gay. The guy who created this is gay.

Okay. Cosa means muscles. Wait, so he hired two non- The cosa. Hold on, he hired two non-gay guys to be a gay couple in his movie. Wow. Do you think part of that was kind of like

just something he'd like to see? Yes. Tarantino right now I do. A foot scene in every movie. You know what though? And they got, that's his type right there. Oh you think so? Yeah, a little Suzuki Dyke looking guy. No way, dude. Little Suzuki Jeep guy.

If I was gay I'd be way more shallow. No, not gay. I don't think you're gay, dude, but you definitely, you could pull it off. Dude, you did this stuff, your hand stuff, was fucking brilliant. As someone who acts, was that good acting? Yeah. I thought it was good. Oh, wait a minute, wait a minute. It was a substantial pause.

Well, I think he was thinking about whether or not to make fun of me, and then he saw, well, let me give him a real answer. That's exactly what I was doing. No, I was doing a lot to make that work. I Know that's good acting Hit it for me. Holy shit. I mean, yeah that guy was that's a tender touch that dude It's what sucks about that as a guy did it and you filmed it and it's never out there I'm gonna be a good thing to have like a little real piece there. Imagine shooting like a fucking horror movie

in the winter in Baltimore. And then never seeing the light of day. I couldn't imagine what that feels like. We did. Oh yeah. Wait a minute. It premiered though. No, no, no, no.

He actually. They're finishing, they're doing an anthology So they're filming multiple they shot the last one towards yeah I'm there it's there they're editing and they're gonna put it on and they're gonna put it out And you know what who the fuck knows happens with that? I don't know what I just said, but no it could be anything Yeah, if this came back I mean, it's not gonna be gayer than that. No, certainly not. Here's the thing, will you have? We have some very good, I was very excited to like,

use some of those things in a reel because there's some scenes of us, the ones of us in the car are very, very fun. I've played gay before. We have a good like back and forth. When? In a, also a short film by Zach Drummer. Zach?

Do you remember Zach? He worked at Apostle. I've not even fucked up. I have no idea. Fuck that is. I think you actually do know him. But he... Zach Drummer? Yeah.

But he... And then there was Fred Joe Guitar. I was just about to do that. Yeah, but you... Tony Bassist. Goddamn it, I wanted the bassist. Quick, think of another instrument. Hurry.

Gary Keyboards. Gary Keyboards. Gary Keyboards. Gary Keyboards. The Scott Bandza, we opened it up for this band. We opened it up for this band. We opened it up for this band. We opened it up for this band. We opened it up for this band. We opened it up for this band. We opened it up for this band. Quick, think of another instrument, hurry! There's only two, Tommy Trumpets! Gary Keyboards!

Gary Keyboards! Gary Keyboards! We open it up for this more instrument. Michael Xylophone! Tommy Trumpets? I just said that. You just said Tommy Trumpets? That buffed the fucking earworm right into you.

Wow, did you hear that? I didn't hear it either. I heard it. I mean, we don't know, he's high all the time. What? Wow. Wow. Wow Wow, they're both high

Yeah, a hundred percent I am do you want to get you guys want to know the end of the movie yes What happened? Yeah, we know what you did This is what are you such a dickhead? I'm a dickhead! He's a dickhead! We moved on to all of our gay movies we were about to hear about his queer I'm done with it I want to hear your movie. No because I had one too. Alright let's just finish. I actually have a movie you can you can watch like mine was a movie movie. What is it on? It was your cell phone. No, it's on. It's on euros.me. Oh, you

can movie. I'm making good core plus you can actually you can you can probably find this movie rented on like AOL or something like that or something What's it called? I'm not gonna tell you till you're done with your gay thing Well, how's it end? Okay, the longest summation of a 15-minute movie I'm enjoying it though. Yeah. Yeah, I'm trying to share my life. Oh it happened once Really that's like a new thing people are like Noticing about you noticing about fat people in general.

What? Uh, that we pull our shirts out a lot. No, I do it too. I'm just saying you don't have to. You're fat. I know. Whoa. Wow. I mean, I'm not as fat as you. Just in case you thought for a second you weren't. Just in case you'd been working hard.

I thought you were saying... You're the fattest guy here. I know. I thought you were saying like no I do that You buddy that's I do it too big guy. I used to be the biggest guy I know and you've in every year's well look at it like you know I'm just saying he's on his way back I am on his way back. He's going to the gym the store Well, dude listen all right, whatever dude. Yeah, it's big

So uh-huh okay in come on Well, dude, listen, alright, whatever, dude. Yeah, it's big. So, okay, in conclusion. Indian knuckle. I have fucking eczema. From you never calling him back. Yeah. He's never called me. I never called you back. You never called me.

Yeah, we don't have. You don't call me. Don't do that to us. What? Don't do that to him. I was saying for all three of us I got to him all the time. Yeah you sometimes yeah sometimes Bobby will go through a real hot streak like

He'll hit me a couple times in in like a month, and then I won't hear from him for a season You did yeah, you're very scared and I called you when you got a car when you got a dejected from Chris Because you can't sell things Good We'll edit that out I can't. You're goddamn right. I can't. Hang on. That's my son. That'll be where that ends. Hang on. We'll edit that out. Hello?

I don't want to ruin your chances of getting back with him. Hello? Max? Can I have another water? Max, I'm on the phone. I'm on the podcast right now. Yeah, we got you another water, dude. Say hi to everybody.

Hi. Oh, never mind. All right. Take that one. That's new. I touched that one. All right. I love you, kid. I'll see you in the morning. All right Yeah, I'm just gonna I'm gonna sleep soon. All right kid. I love you Started a workout from like 933 and I did like two minutes. Oh, do you like the new gym the little dumbbells?

I said, yeah looks good, right? Yeah, I did a bicep workout Let's go nice buddy. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, Max. Youp workout. Let's go. Nice buddy. You still doing jujitsu? Oh yeah, five years. That's awesome man. Adult class. They moved him to the adult class. Nice.

Just bodying kids. Well if he's anything like his father, he has shocking strength that he wields. On vacation. I love you buddy. I'll talk to you tomorrow morning alright? Wake me up tomorrow. Bye.

Alright bye kid. Love that kid. He's got a fucking man's voice. Yeah. Dude his, his, he's my height right now and his hands are bigger than mine. That's awesome. And he's got a problem dude. Yeah.

I mean a fucking serious problem. We were coming, we took the trash out, and it's nighttime, so I went down with him, and he's coming back, he goes, hang on one second. And he puts me over in the grass, I'm like, what's up? He goes, just come here for a second. I go, what? And he goes, and he just went, huh.

And I was like, no, no, no, no, no. He's like a dog. Dude, he was like, and I was like, ah, this motherfucker, and he tried to just throw him, and I had to grab him and fucking, and he- Wow. Oh, the Bobby. Went on his back, and he went, uh, and I went, dude, not yet.

Yeah. Not yet. But soon. Whoa. But soon. No, I've felt that before. I know that exact move that you pulled on him. Wow, I thought you were-

Pre-Calta Cruz, I just told that story downstairs. I grabbed him. I go, I want to feel it. Yeah. Bobby, out of nowhere, Bobby got me confused with Mike Vecchione and thought I was a fucking Penn State wrestler. Somebody told me that you were a wrestler. I'm the most front-facing failed basketball player you know.

This was also pre-surgery, Bobby. So you were a real know. This was also, you know, pre-surgery Bobby. So you were a real bear. It was a real bear. And you were in a towel. It was just so little cloth in between you and I. It was like his movie. Yeah. Yeah, so Bobby comes behind me.

We're getting ready for the Calta cruise. We're in Calta's giant mansion in one of the corridors. And Bobby comes behind me, bear hugs me, whispers in my ear, I wanna feel your strength. And then I tried to get wrist, I tried to actually do a wrestling thing where I grabbed wrists and tried to push back my hip to gain separation.

That's what I thought. And when he thrust it into you. And like Harambe, you just picked me up over your head and spiked me face first into my camera equipment. I know who Harambe is. Who is it? He's a fucking gorilla that was shot to death. Unjustly gunned down.

Yeah, yeah. By a cop. I apologize. I know pop culture, my friend. If anybody does, it's- Is that pop culture? Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

I apologize, Michael. It's okay. I was leaking blood heading into an international cruise. I don't remember much of that. We bled together. We did. Well, I opened my mouth with you. Yeah, that's cool. What are you going to do? You should have fought back. You should have went like this and just fucking rubbed it on his face.

Yeah. I was too sick. I went, huh, like BJ Trang. And then me and Feeny are holding our bags like... And then Michael would have thrown up. Michael would be like, huh? I went, huh? Like, DJ time? Yeah. And then me and Finnear holding our bags. And then Mike would have thrown up. And I'd be like, uh, we'll wait downstairs. Awkward. Yeah, and we'd go, I think we'll need a hotel. Uh, bell keep?

You suck at it. It don't work with bell keep. It sucks. It's great that bells. Your fingers are too pointy for it. He wants us to work so bad. I've never wanted a bell to stop. How are you touching it?

You're stabbing it. Yeah, because your little thin fingers can't hit it squarely. Now I got the touch. You guys are all fucked. Mike's fucking Irish alcoholic fingers can't hit it. He has the Nosferatu digits. He has Mad Dog 2020

knuckles. Now that I don't know what that is. You've never drank Mad Dog 2020? No. Like energy drink with alcohol? Now that I don't know what that is. You've never drank Mad Dog 2020? No. Like energy drink with alcohol? No, no it's not. It's actually, it's a runoff.

It's the runoff wine from when they're making it and bottling it and it's the garbage that they then put into this one thing. And they mix it with whiskey. Yeah, it's the only booze I cried. Oh, I thought it was like a upright. No, no, no, no. It's like two, it's only 250 for like a pint. It was like, it's only 250 for like a pint yeah like it's

good called bum juice yeah they get it to stay alive in the winter and it got him fucked up and kept him warm yeah and I used to drink that when I was 13 because it was cheap it was so fucking nuts so I was in a gay movie I was not a YKWD. So, I was just letting him get it up. Brokeback Mountain, you played the mountain. Go back in. So, it was called Dating Game, I believe, or Dating Games. What the Y? Either I believe, or Dating Games. With a Y? Either Dating Games or Dating Game.

Was it spelled G-A-Y-M-S? It's literally the joke I just said. Oh. Tommy Trumpet's over here. Right, you guys? So. You said a different thing, though. I made the other one.

I said game and I said with a Y, and then he goes, with a G-A-Y-M-E? I think I said it different thing though. I mean game and I said with a Y and then he goes to GAY I think I said it better than you Why is like what does that mean? Everybody got it Listener got it. Did you get it? I did not get it He's on his third power bar He's not even paying attention. Bobby's on his third power bar. Bobby's staring at a picture of his old self.

What infuriates me is this. This is infuriating. This is hilarious. Holy shit. You get the shot? That looks like you're yelling at the guy for taking your picture. When I shot this, Refuse the stock photo, dude!

I'm going to have to send this to Zach. When I shot this, Just use a stock photo dude. I'm gonna have to send this to Zach, when I shot this I was fucking shredded. I was maybe a month into New York. Yeah shredded cheese. This is why he does it because you keep doing it. You do what you need to do. I also almost had that.

It would shut him down. This is why he's where he's at, because of you. Listen, I was a month into New York, this is the second audition I got, I booked the first three auditions I got in New York, I booked this movie, and it was her gay, see the Samantha who's smoking hot back there, I was her gay roommate.

And I had to do a dance in a gold, who's smoking hot. Yeah, she's cute. I was her gay roommate. That's crazy. And I had to do a dance in a gold G-string panties. What? What? Can you please find that? Yeah, hold this up. That's what we gotta get up. Wait, why did they use a picture of one of the sand worms from Dune?

You look like Shades of Santa. Why do they put glasses on that bowling ball? I want to go to Sagan and be like, you have to use the photo from the movie. You can't just randomly. You can easily just update your IMDB. That's because that's your IMDB pro picture. Just update that. You're like holding a merch shirt. 30 bucks dude. Just update that. You're like holding a merch shirt. No, man. No, that's my...

30 bucks, dude. Two for 40. That's my dinner napkin. I used to carry my own dinner napkin. They don't have it, do they? Danny, but look at Sexy Bobby at Lice Night at Eddie's over there. Let's see that.

And look at Eight Guys. Do you ever see Eight Guys? No. Wow, Lice Night at Eddie's. That was Dan Cook's first movie he made, independent film independent. So I could see the black white leader from here Oh, yeah, what's the right click on eight guys? Did he go straight from his half hour right to that? Same photo Why are you going to WrestleMania?

All right, click on that, make that big. Danny's doing the best. Oh, Jay Davis was in this. Yeah, Jay, I mean everybody. Alonzo Bowden, Gary Gullman. That's everybody. What's his name was in that too, the- John DeResta.

John DeResta was in it. Who else? Rusty Dooley. Rusty Dooley, who was a comic in L.A. Can you zoom in on that poster because Bobby on the poster? Did your picture in this one sucks, too? Oh, there you are. That's a good. Oh, that's that's Dominican, Bobby.

That's yeah. Yeah. That's back in the day. Your girlfriend with a line down with the soul patch connector. You really look like you should have been on temptation island Yeah, you know like you had a total look you would have been yeah, but I don't empty He's the now I've never seen the dating game movie. I don't know where it is. I can't find it, but in that I My ass is out What is this and I'm dancing around by myself doing gay dances? I've never seen the movie

It's there's a fucking synopsis right there. Go ahead and read it eight guys a short film They'll stop filled with Dane cook and a few of his fellow comic buddies To chat GPT write this Alonzo Bowden Jay Davis Robert Kelly Rusty Dooley John de rest Is it they name us all the guys? Yeah? Eight guys living in a shoebox sized apartment make a bet to see who gets to keep the apartment And who has to leave how the last person to receive a phone call wins a dump of an apartment How about the Vegas has eight guys underneath it says that's 16 balls Where's that say all right underneath eight guys on the poster. And were these all your like headshots

that you put together? No, that's a poster for the movie. That's a poster for the movie, you fucking idiot. That's 16 balls, who the fuck is responsible for that? Who do you think? Who do you think? They should be fucking shot into the sun. In that movie, me and Alonzo were fucking improving

a scene where we kind of fight. And he starts calling me names. I go, go fuck you you Brownie he went did you just call me a brownie I can't do this no It was Alonzo Bowden not fucking Samuel Jackson Alonzo Bowden was in the girl next door as like a porn producer And he was so fucking jacked in that movie. I had no idea. He was a comic Yeah, I remember we were great story Mike

Jack really good guy He was jacked really good guy. Well, I don't know It was but then you shit your self-esteem I shovel shit on the last second and I flew out about I did not I had I had it I was about to tell you that he we were on tour with him in Canada me him and Ornie Adams, you know And Brendan. Oh, yeah I opened for him one. He wanted to have Choconut, Ornie Adams on TV. Not on TV, after a TV segment. They did a news thing.

He would write topical stuff about news. Like that day he'd write a joke about Obama or something. So he had this joke about Obama he was talking about. Ornie went on the TV show and just took it and used it and it killed and Alonzo you see him on the show he's just like this he grabbed him by the neck he goes you took mine yeah wow and I've never seen him like that he was gonna murder I fucking love that fucking crazy yeah what a crazy thing to take someone's bit and then do it in front of them on

television like sitting next to them. Yeah. Fucking wild. Hey, is there, can you watch, where is that other film? Is that on something? Cause I wouldn't mind watching it. I looked for dating games. I couldn't find it anywhere.

Is it on, it's nowhere. You can't find it anywhere. I, what, I, was it VHS? Was that where it would have been released? I mean, I guess I'm that old. Yes. Yeah. I'm going to. This was Yeah. This was 1998, this was

for sure VHS. It's gotta be. It's definitely not streaming anywhere. But the fact that it hasn't even been digitized, it hasn't even, it's still before the internet? No. I don't even think they printed it on a VHS. Yeah, but why would you not digitize something? Go back to the producers, go back to that thing. It's not on like, yeah it's not on movies on video on demand or anything. It's on this and all the people. Go back to that thing. It's not on like, yeah, it's not on movies. It's on this and all the people in it. Maybe if you Google something like dirty games stream full. Stream where? I do that with so many things.

Oh, you did that already? Dirty games? What's dirty games? Whatever game, whatever movie we're talking about. That's what you were doing. Dating games, Robert Kelly. Dirty games. Watch now for the live. With a Y, right, you guys?

Dating games. Dirty games. Watch now for the why, right, you guys? Dating games. There it is. Dating games. Isn't there a movie called Dirty Games, though? All right, Samantha. We'll go to Samantha. Wait, Cole Suddath is in this?

Bobby's head shot is from the side. It's a deuce. Oh, he's a... Wait, then he a Prince Charming. Wait a minute. Who's Perfect Tommy? He plays trumpet. It's a snake sabo. There's no way that he a prince charming who's perfect Tommy's he plays trumpets a snake sabo There's no way that guy's alive still dude. He's got to be alive the snakes. He's in rock of ages Oh, he is cool. Wow couldn't be doing better

Snake I mean, where is this? Movie why are we not we're looking up Dave right now, but. All right, go back, go back, go back. Go back, go to what's her name? Samantha LaMalle. Right there, yeah. Samantha LaMalle. She was so adorable. Hold on, can you go back to your picture?

She casted me right there. That's the one who casted me. This actress? Yep, she was her movie. Oh, okay. This is her movie. An actress and producer. Yeah, she made this movie. Yeah, what is that? her movie producer. Yeah, she she made this movie

Yeah, what is that? Is that the chick? Is that the chick for it? That's the chick We at least see the trailer what he she's a gray isn't it? So I'm trying to think no That's not no she's kind of cute still the one that was doing those back. She's like 40 shades of gray That's how many he has that's how many you have in your beard. Fucking old asshole. I love it. You're when you just laugh like he thinks he's supposed to laugh like a robot. Yeah, I go, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah So goddamn funny man. Hey man. Why you be funny? I where we now Nowhere are you Danny? No, no trailer. We gotta find that Okay, dating game. Oh, wait what film no, it's not a short film. It was an actual movie the dating game killer

It's crazy. Um, so there you go. So I played a gay guy too. I bet it was great If it has what you do like in terms of what how I was just a gay roommate and then she catches me Were you put into any gay situations like no no no you're just I was just I was just a confidant I was like a trope back then yeah, you I mean you were in love. I was just gay what yeah I had you just whip out fighting what vitamin what kind of vitamin No, no, what is it? Dude? Don't ever go. I won't understand vitamins. What is it? You fucking hippie.

It's for my joints. What is wrong with you? Are you all right? Yeah. Why are you chewing on a- My body's in pain all the time, so I take- Why? What happened? It's a vitamin.

You know, yeah. As a former elite athlete, my body is breaking down, so I have to take things to lube up the joints. Can I see it? What was it? No, you might relapse. Is it weed? It's a little bit of a lot of things.

Why are you so, are you fucking eating heroin? It's a kratom candy. Is it really? No, no, not at all. Yeah, it's inedible. It's weed? Yeah. So what the fuck you worried about? It's a cratum candy. Is it really? No, no, not at all. It's a, yeah, it's inedible. It's a, it's weed? Yeah. So what the fuck you worried about?

It's legal. I don't know, you just have cornered me. Take some more weed, you paranoid fuck. I just didn't understand. Great idea. You took out a fucking ball of something and took a bite and then shoot it and then went no, we're good, keep going. I thought you guys were talking, that's why.

To you, you fucking pothead. I'm sorry. Damn, I wish we could've watched your scene, dude. I know. I love when you turn into skateboard, Ricky. Remember when in the pandemic I made those videos for YKWD and we said that I was like a sponsored skater? I wanted to do those forever.

I wanted to literally- I made two and I was like, what, nothing's, what are we doing? I literally wanted to sponsor him as a skateboarder. I wanted to do those forever. I wanted to do when I was like, what nothing's I literally wanted to sponsor him as a skater. I can see British going, I don't want to do this anymore. So I won't. That's exactly what happened. It's exactly what happened. You're like, I'm done. You never did it again. Well, there was no payoff. I was going to give you $100 an episode. Well, you should have told me that while I was doing them. I don't know No, because I wanted you to do it for the love of the game I want to see I didn't want to fucking taint you're like Willy Wonka you win Charlie

Did he say you lose No, he does say you win. He goes. No, he didn't say he didn't scream that he goes She's all there black as white clear as crystal you drank the fizzy lifting drink You touch the ventilation which now needs to be washed and scrubbed you lose Good day, sir And then and then he goes mr. Wonka and he gives him back the let me do that part. Okay, mr. Wonka Now he puts him on the thing And he only sees back

Charlie What that's how he says it you know, I don't want it now Fine, whatever good. There's a lot of kids. I would want good Sincere anger that you didn't want to make the thing. I'm out of here. I get in my elevator and I go left. I go left.

You go, I don't want it anymore. Brendan broke character. It was fine. I didn't break character. That was fine. You know what I realized about Sagalow? He has rage. It's bubbling like a volcano. It's lava. And everyone's going to go, poof.

We've been trying to tell everybody this for a long time. He's the cuddly bear. Everybody loves him. He's the sweet pie. He's got red little cheeks. And that's where this conversation ends. Thank you, Mike. But he's a fucking bubbling teapot. He really is not It's time fucking louder. He will take out Hawaii with his anger. Yeah, I love that what Pompeii Mount Fatsuva

I'll do myself. Yeah, put this in your mouth, fat sous-vide. No way. It's really good. No way. That's got protein in it. Cookies and caramel protein bar. That's one of the healthier ones.

Yeah, right healthy. Cookies and caramel, naturally and artificially flavored. Yep. 20 grams of protein, no added sugar. That's fine. I'll try this can I try this I guess I already opened it. Okay. We'll eat it actually. I mean it's not fully open you take it in your face Try it try it try it. I think you're gonna like it Pretty good right That is actually very good. I told you means there's no way this is good for you. Why not?

Oh, I can find out right now. Well, in the long run, that's probably got a lot of cancer causing chemicals. Don't let this thin fucking ass overrun this moment. This is an 18 out of 100 bad. This has got four high

risk ingredients. It's got sucralose in it, so it's a sweetener. Increases type 2 diabetes, chronic inflammation in the digestive tract, and metabolic disorders. What does it do? It's also got thickeners, flavors, emulsification. This is a great app, dude. Why can't I see out of my eye?

It's also a bit too fatty and a bit too caloric. You're talking about him? But it is. Oh wait, I skinned Sagal. I'm sorry. Let me start again. He's sent that, he's, he caused that. Will you send me that app? Yeah, I'll cause all y'all to die. Send me that app. What? What's wrong with you dude? No. Why do you get so fucking mad so fast? I'm not mad. I'm actually less mad than I used to be. What made you happy? You got a girlfriend now?

He does. She's the best, dude. Yep. I love her. She is cool. Yeah? Better than the last one, right? Yeah.

Last one was a nightmare. Last one was a nightmare. Is she a comedian? Yes, she is. Yeah, she is a comic, yeah. The new one? Yeah. Oh, God.

Why? Because you can't date a girl with a headshot. She doesn't have a headshot. Whoa. She's fucking lazy. She doesn't have a whoa fucking She's not that good Say headshot like it's the fucking 90s Promo pics out there. I went to I was thinking about getting him after the pandemic. And then he's stupid. I was like, no, but it's just sick. Oh,

it really makes me sick. I was about to have my own lava over here. That second sentence came in. I don't know that that fucking flashed me. Yeah. I was like, Fucking flash me It's the one Yeah, he like knows to be the universal truth is that his hair is incredible So the fact that you said that just threw him It was just so in the middle of it your hair is stupid I meant the new kid stupid. Yeah, I was stupid. I don't know what I was saying Stupid but you were talking about the thing. Oh got it

Talking about that thing. Hey, what are you doing Tony? Yeah He was talking about a day Okay Love that you're doing Tony's voice saying his own name. He's looking in the mirror going you tea Okay He's looking in the mirror going Positive affirmation Tony's no, no doing positive. You're a very good-looking guy. You deserve to be alive I bet he did do that though positive affirmation of threes

Your wife in case they love you. What is he? There it is. You gotta be grateful. What is he in a fucking comedy classroom? You piece of shit. Why don't you cut the cord and let him fuck the other man. You fucking piece of shit.

Yeah, but you don't like to hear that. I let him deal with it. He's got a highlighted Judy Blume book for him. This fucking hippie's the problem with this kid. He would have been a success 10 years ago He's got a highlighted Judy Blume book for him Hippies the problem with this kid. He would have been a success ten years ago if this fucking picking any ten years ago I was eight But you aren't eight. I'm 18 now name not you know, you could do a really good Adam Sandler impression when he's screaming. Oh school, but do we do no no when he's like? Yeah, anybody could do that impression when he's screaming. Oh, scuba-duba-duba. No, no, when he's like, shut up!

Anybody could do that. You could do it. Go ahead. Shut up! No, your mouth is wrong. Shut up! Keep it on high. No, he does like a cross thing like, shut up! Stop looking at me, swan! Swan He does that he's what what What are you fucking doing right now are you exhausted I am don't eat any more of this I think it fucked with you I know I did four episodes of my podcast today So I know I did I did so much today and I have I think I have to two bonfires tomorrow I have to do something else more and then Thursday after three of these and then I go do a bone to pick and then I go home pack and they're gonna fly out well yeah Danny's first offer was are you guys available on Available on Wednesday that fucking 6 45 a.m.

I'm in studio. Yeah I just way. This is the perfect time for you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just want to commute with the rest of the people. Yeah, no parking, tired. How, how? Extra expensive. Now Feeny, how is it, how's everything going with you fam, dude? It's great. Kid's great. He's uh, plays guitar a lot. He's very... Really? Yeah, yeah. How old is he now? Two and a half. Every day. Playing guitar? Every day. I mean, he's like, you know, he, he doesn't, he knows his is where he's up to cause I show him so many music videos. He's up to like, he goes with his fingers up the thing. He's not making chords, but he moves his fingers up the thing. He obviously knows how to strum.

But now he started adding the foot tap beat to the nice. And you know what is, you know, what symbols on his knees, you know, it's his current favorite. Yeah. Yeah. Dick Van Dyke's brother. That wasn't Dick Van Dyke. Oh, it's a holly doll a day with Mary. And he has like the whole harmonica. I was talking about the Dick Van Dyke show when his brother came on and did that show. One man band. Um, you know what his favorite music video is right now though, that he's watching? Basket case. No, but he has seen green day. I watched it live. Walking contradiction isradiction is a good one too. In Too Deep by 741, which is a great kid-friendly music video because they're all jumping into the pool being silly. It's like the jocks versus the

the punks and then they're playing in an empty pool and then they all jump in the pool. It's very, he loves it. I just finished that guy's book, lead singer from 41. Yeah Yeah, he got like great lasted by his manager for many years. Oh, yeah What what? Yeah, how old was he? What why was he 17? Why did you turn into a fat? Boy, yeah, what happened? He his manager Greg Norrie basically groomed and Essentially sexually abused him from all those years like an all-killer-no-filler yeah yeah and the band didn't even know and they did that thing where they were like if you tell the members of the band you're

fucked yeah yeah are you fucked if you know if you don't said he just didn't want to do it he was like nobody knew I didn't want to tell anybody that I was and but he was like what are you doing he was like we never really had sex I was just we were just a lot of making out and jerking each other off. And that I was listening to and I'm like, yeah. Are you listening to that? I was listening to him say it. Is that how you got your motivation for that role?

Jerking him off. Hmm. Yeah. Hmm. Ha ha ha. I never thought of it like that. Dude, I'd love if Feeny's kid just fucking learns the stairway to heaven.

Do-de-we-do-de-we. I'm really glad that's where you took that sentence. I'd love if Feeny's kid just fucking learns the stairway to heaven I'm really glad that's where you took that sentence Post what you were talking about that was going off in a completely different area Now what if you have a prodigy what if you have a kid who's just fucking I mean by Sex is just killing it. Are you gonna? That's the thing. Are you gonna quit the business and make money off of him? Yes For him, yeah Perfect life travel with my kid. That's great Are you gonna quit the business and make money off of him? Yes! Absolutely! You'll open for him. Yeah! Perfect life!

Travel with my kid, that's great. But no, if he's a... That is the thing now, right? Where they go, if they are a prodigy, you have to think of, well, if you put them... If they want to be on the internet and have their own YouTube channel and they're like, little guitar thing, that's how all these people... That's like that Nina, that drummer, that little like, I think she's a British, that British drummer,

the little, she started as a little girl at four, with her YouTube age, and now she's playing with Foo Fighters on tour at like 17 or something. But it's also the thing of like, you're, you know, you're completely destroying your kids' lives. You know, it's the new Hollywood. It's YouTube. I mean, there's a way to do it.

Like I watch the Outdoor Boys. Yeah, I watch that too. I love that guy. You guys ever watch the Wild Adventure Girls? No. But we watch the Outdoor Boys. And that show, that guy makes millions, has no ads. And you know.

His teeth are holistic. How does he make millions, then? From views. From sponsorships and gear and shit like that. No, from views. Oh, like he's monetized. I thought all that gear was sponsored. Like, they send him that stuff. No, no, from views. Oh, like no sponsor. I thought all that gear was sponsored. Like they send them that stuff. No, he buys, he doesn't do any of that. He doesn't promote anything. He does because he doesn't want to have to do stuff for people. That's all his stuff. But he gets, he gets, you know,

he'll put a video up and in the first hour it's 4 million views. Yeah. Well, and me and everybody on Tik TOK, as soon as his videos come up in your algorithm, it's a running joke on TikTok that you must go to bed. Like as soon as that comes up, it's like you literally check the comments. It's like rules are rules. I just got to work going to bed. Good night. Yeah, it's great. But I mean, he does it well with his kids.

There's a couple of people that do all right with their kids. But if you have a prodigy, like if one of your kids is a prodigy at something, Justin Bieber, would you make, would you just get behind it? No, I mean I would hope that he would just... I sabotage him. Yeah, I would. You're not gonna get to the level I've never seen. You hit him with a pipe. No, I don't, I mean... You got too close, kid. You got too close. Yeah, why couldn't you just stop asking questions? Yeah, yeah, you couldn't just leave well enough alone. I'm a star. Come on, Brendan, let's go do a podcast.

Yeah. Get in, have fun. Jump in. Yeah, this was like a train crossing. You guys just both stopped. All the trains went by. The fun trains, I might add, went by and you guys were just. To be fair, it was only two lines we said, so.

Well, I'm one foot up before. You just fucking cock block the fun train. Yeah. Yeah you really. You just hit a steer. You just hit a steer. Yeah you really didn't like having fun on that train did you?

Yeah. There's too many hobos on that train. Okay. On that train there's too many hobos. I got it, I got it. Four, what is this thing? I'll tell you a thing or two. I'll tell you. As the mic pulls out and it's a while to edit. On that train I too many I got it I got it What are those called those guys that ride on trains hobos now there's a

car there's a there's a V word yeah This is just called Van van van vandals van vanguards no my god no they hot there Vagabond Vagabond no man Vagabond call me what you wear man you knew you were there you saw that concert Metallica you should know he just said remember we went to metallic he's not listening I was too busy in the riff you didn't join the show went to my job you guys I don't want to ruin your rip Join why do you keep saying we're not sure a join the fun? We're joining it would you just do fucking see That time yeah back

Two-finger day Kick it off. So let's end it. Yeah Are we ending I gotta add it's over end. It's over? It's over. Well, no, it's not over. That was so fun. We gotta go to Patreon. We got questions from the fans. I'm gonna pull it back on them.

But Danny usually just keeps this on the free episode anyway. What? I'm gonna probably just lighten the curtain. Go to robertkellylive.com. I'm in San Diego, then I'm in Ben Salem, PA, at Parks Casino and the Dojo of Comedy on the 6th and the 7th and then I shut it down for the winter. I got a Portland main gig and that's about it guys. So please

go to punchup.live slash Robert Kelly and When's this coming out? No, no, no, no, no, no. No, in May? Fourth of July, probably. I want this to come out, no, no, no, no. No. No, soon, no, no.

What's he saying? It's gonna be three, no, like, more than that. Three or four weeks. Well, don't tell them the truth. See, this is why you have to, this is why we have to shoot more of your very topical things. Don't tell them the truth. If it's before June 6th, I'm in Boston,

and I know a lot of you know Bobby and love Bobby, and he's from there as well. I'm going to promote you that weekend. Thank you. That would be lovely. Where are you at? I actually do okay at Laugh Boston.

Oh yeah. Yeah. But please come out. Come out. I'm very excited for that. I'm there the six through the seven, three shows. I'll be in Point Pleasant, New Jersey in June, Austin in July and you know when everybody loves going to Texas and Jersey and a bunch of other places.

MikeCannonComedy.com for all that. And Beautiful Boys. Check out Beautiful Boys podcast with him and Andy Haynes. What do you got there, Fien? While you're on Punch Up, go ahead and go on over to PunchUp.live slash Mike Fieny. And then I'll also be in Laugh Boston, but in July. But you can be there. That'll be fun.

It's enough of a gap to save up money for an extra for an extra ticket It's a couple tickets and there's no tariffs on a ticket And then 100% tariffs YouTube comms as Mike Feeney comedy Instagram to tell I am Mike That's it forget it I am Mike Feeney on social media. Thank you. You are Mike Feeney, I'm gonna talk to everybody else's plugs. Dude, stop. Don't let everybody's plugs in. That's it, forget it. I am Mike Feeney on social media, thank you. You are Mike Feeney.

Check him out, hilarious. Sag's, what do you got? Brendan Sagalow on everything, Instagram, I have Sag Daddy Pod. I mean, I want to talk to you about. My YouTube, and I will be in Long Island at Governors June 6th and June 7th. Please come out.

I would really like for people to see me and my act right now. And thank you very much. He's a great comedian, everybody. Check him out. Yeah. Long Island. Homecoming. Hero shows up home.

My son is a good boy. Baby. Boys, what do you got? Fast. Follow me on Instagram at Danny breath. Joe shows up home. My son is a good boy. My baby. Boys, what do you got? Fast. Follow me on Instagram, at Danny Braff. Everybody, check out Joe Russell's G Show on YouTube. What the fuck, what happened to Joe? This is his grandfather.

And then, wait, and then we'll go to this, ready? Go ahead. You can followe on Instagram What a dud you are what's your name again? Zack okay That sounded good though. All right guys. We're gonna go right now to patreon.com slash Robert Kelly We have questions from you the fans and I rather scenario It's a new it's a new segment called, What Would You Do?

In This Scenario. There goes the hypothetical. The internet really hates it. So make sure you go over there and join up if you want to ask questions and be part of that. And get the episode earlier than everybody else and also an extra episode a week called Extra Extra. If not, we'll see you guys next time.