Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - YKWD #615 | Pimpin' | Keith Robinson & Dante Nero

Episode Date: November 30, 2025

This week on YKWD Dante Nero and Keith Robinson join the pod to discuss what's it like to be a pimp & their time as a male stripper.Get the EXTRA YKWD, Watch LIVE and UNEDITED AT https://www.patreon.c...om/robertkelly LIVE FROM THE SHED AND MORE ON PATREON DUDE!!! https://twitter.com/robertkelly https://twitter.com/YKWDpodcast http://instagram.com/ykwdudepodcast https://www.facebook.com/YkwdPodcast/Support the show and get 30% off your first Cornbread Hemp order.Use code DUDE at https://www.cornbreadhemp.com/DUDESupport the show and start your free online Hims Hair visit athttps://www.hims.com/YKWD Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:01:28 and important safety information. Yeah, baby. We're starting the podcast right now. We're back. You know what, dude, live. Welcome everybody to the show. YKWI. I started a social media podcast.
Starting point is 00:01:42 The fact. The YKWD podcast. YKWD is back again. Old school, back in the day, where it all started before them all. This podcast is so fun and crazy. It has no rules. God, to help you're ruining this.
Starting point is 00:01:57 Bruce of Bargana, man. Sorry, it's a comedy podcast. This isn't NPR. That's what this podcast does. Is there any better show? This is the original. Original. What's up, everybody?
Starting point is 00:02:16 We're live from the Comedy Cellar Studios above the Comedy Cellar. We're back again, YKWD. We've got a lot of new followers on here. Welcome to the podcast. If you're new here, subscribe. hit that button for me make sure you like it in those comments tell us how much you love it and how much you hate it doesn't matter uh also we got patreon dot com slash robert kelly i had one guy say why you got a patreon if you got the fuck it's because it helps the show pay the producers pay for
Starting point is 00:02:46 all the shit it's not a lot it's five bucks so do it if you can if you can't here it is free every sunday when you do the patreon you get the show first free you get an extra episode every week, and you get unedadda-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. So today we got a great show. We have somebody who's late, but it's not by their fault. What is their fault? I mean, technically, it is their fault. Danny, who do we got? Right now, we have Dante Niro from the M. Godfrey-Wee Trust podcast. And mine. And the D'Neum. Man School 202 is mine. Man-School 202, which I'm familiar with. Yeah. The other one is Godfrey and You. Yeah, me and Godfrey and Trust. I co-host with him.
Starting point is 00:03:26 God, three inch. I like that. And then, of course, we have who else, Danny? Coming in in a little bit is going to be Keith Robinson. Slow. I mean, he's downstairs eating a Caesar salad like it's his last meal. This motherfucker takes 10 minutes to chew. I thought he was done.
Starting point is 00:03:42 No, he keeps chewing. God damn it. So, this is why, Keith, I mean, he's the worst, he's the worst person. I mean, we shouldn't be. friends with him he's a bad person he is a bad person he's not yeah he's really like like really a bad we've gotten closer because all of my friends are dumb and uh might might no no okay no i mean you just not around but my friends are dumb and uh he does read some politics and so you know who reads i read you do keith doesn't no but he watches videos though he doesn't no but he watches videos though
Starting point is 00:04:26 And he, he, barely. Yeah, no. But the, slim, the pickings is slim, my friend. Keith, his opinion is based on your opinion. Whatever your opinion is, he's going against it. A lot of times. I've actually got him where he doesn't really go against me. I know that sounds crazy, right?
Starting point is 00:04:43 God, I don't know how you do that. It's been a lot of work. Yeah. A lot of work. I've had to show him he was wrong every time. So he doesn't really go against me. In fact, when he's going against other people, and he can't handle it he'll call me on a three-way
Starting point is 00:04:58 like he'll sick me on people I remember when I used to do three-ways when he was a fucking rock star You and I both Oh God what happened Yeah you still can do it No I can't I mean you can't
Starting point is 00:05:08 You're because you're married but yeah Yeah you can't I had a three-way About three months ago Fuck off Really Yeah Okay now a three-way
Starting point is 00:05:18 Yeah With you Yeah Women Yes I'm kidding I don't throw nothing I'm joking
Starting point is 00:05:26 I've seen you looked out you looked out I was like What the fuck I'm interested So Okay You meet
Starting point is 00:05:36 Is this a A spontaneous thing Um They're hanging out You So I don't have That thing where chicks Would like
Starting point is 00:05:47 You know I used to be buff Where they would go Oh I'll do that But I just Now you force them No I just talk I just talk
Starting point is 00:05:55 And just people are dumb Oh don't say that What if they're listening They just are I mean no I'm not talking about them They're just used to people Not having opinions and not Reading and not
Starting point is 00:06:09 Having Not more like I think that people are Purposely Stupid Can I say something about reading Because you've mentioned it twice now And it's bugging me
Starting point is 00:06:20 Okay You asked me though I know I know. But I was talking my wife about this. Reading back in the day was something you had to do. Right. You got a new whatever, a new toaster.
Starting point is 00:06:39 You had to read the direction. Yeah. You got a new car. You had to read this. You had to read that. But now YouTube is our new encyclopedia. Yes. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:48 And I, instead of reading something, we'll just go to YouTube. And it will teach me everything I need to know. Fair enough. I've learned so much off of YouTube. I mean, in the middle of the night, fix my heating off of YouTube. Sure. Would it cost me thousands.
Starting point is 00:07:05 Sure. I made a pirate ship in the backyard from Max off of some guy on YouTube. And he just walked you through it. He just did it. I watched it twice. I bought the wood. And I made it. Oh, you made the pirate from scratch?
Starting point is 00:07:19 Yes. You didn't even, it wasn't a hit. You know the pirate shit in the back of the house? Of course I know. I made that. With the, uh... Yeah, with the sale. With the line.
Starting point is 00:07:27 It was chalkboard. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that was my wife. I mean, she had the details. She had the, she has the creativity to it. Yeah, yeah. But I mean, yeah. You know that fence in my backyard?
Starting point is 00:07:37 Yes. Put that up. YouTube. All YouTube. How about the bowling alley desk? That was YouTube. Oh, that was so funny. You almost died that day.
Starting point is 00:07:47 Oh. People don't, I have... Oh, yeah, because you were just going to do it by yourself. Well, I did the first. by myself. Yeah, yeah. I called you a stand. I called you an emergency.
Starting point is 00:07:57 Yeah. Because I got this idea. I wanted a 10 foot by 25 foot table like Apple. Yeah. I just wanted a long table. Me and Don to sit at and she does her work over there and I do my work over here. Never happened. The dreams you have when you fucking move it with a shit are fucking wild.
Starting point is 00:08:16 She was going to make her jewelry. I was going to do my jokes. Never sat there. No, I watched porn there. She just put shit on top of it But anyways I go So I look on
Starting point is 00:08:29 Whatever the fuck I looked on Again I think it was eBay And I went I found a bowling alley I remember this And a truck tipped over And it broke the
Starting point is 00:08:40 Broke the bowling alley in halves This guy had Like you know 75 pieces of a bowling alley 10 foot By different sizes Yeah In this container
Starting point is 00:08:52 In his backyard over where you live in Brooklyn. Yeah. He goes, it's in the backyard. I'm not helping you. You can sift through whatever you want. I had to go through. I so had the stack of bowling alley.
Starting point is 00:09:04 In a dumpster. It was in like a container unit. Dude, each piece weighs fucking 500 pounds. Right. So as I'm going... It's about five inches. You know what a bowling alley is? It's two by fours glued together.
Starting point is 00:09:18 Okay. That's all a bullet. And then sand it down and then, you know, varnished over and over and over and over. It was four inches. It's that, exactly. And then just wrote, dude. You just did the math?
Starting point is 00:09:29 The whole stack. I don't read. And I don't do math. Dude, I had to like take off. The stack almost fell on me. I almost fucking died. Yeah. And then I found my piece and I immediately called you.
Starting point is 00:09:41 Right. I was like, the only person I know that could help me out of all my friends. I went, no. No. Rich Fox. Mm-hmm. Call it, no. Oh, was at Keith?
Starting point is 00:09:51 Absolutely not. Nobody, the only person I know with muscles is you. And you fucking help me so much. You came over, helped me put it in my car, drove to my house. And then you get ready to take it home. No, and you, yeah, you're like, dude, you ain't going to get that in your house, stupid. You ain't getting that out of you. I wouldn't have, I would have had to leave it in my car just sticking out the back.
Starting point is 00:10:12 And you followed me all the way to fucking Westchester and help me take it out. And you didn't ask for anything. You just asked, I was like, you want some food? And you were like, yes. and then Don fed you. A lot of food. You know how I met Voss? How? Patrice was picking up a treadmill that he never used.
Starting point is 00:10:31 And when Voss was living in Jersey in the attic, you remember he was living in the attic of something, like the ghost of Mrs. Mewer house at the top in the clock tower? I didn't know that. And we had to go get the treadmill. Really? And Patrice was, I was like, He's picking it up.
Starting point is 00:10:53 Now, that's the first time I met Vos. Because who, Patrice lived over there. Yeah, he lived over there. Will. Communapar. Right. Yeah. And I don't know, Voss lived there. Norton lived in Jersey, too.
Starting point is 00:11:08 I didn't know that. Everybody lived in Jersey City for a week. And I was like, this sucks. No, it was too fucking New York. You wanted some grass. You wanted some grass. You wanted some grass I moved to the city to a doorman building
Starting point is 00:11:23 I remember the, well So I remember the other apartment that you fixed The duplex Oh you got you went to the one I bought Yes Yeah that one was the shit That was the shit That was down the block from my job
Starting point is 00:11:34 Was it? Oh yeah The phone company was down the block Verizon's right down the street I remember you drive by Yeah I would see you on the streets in a while Yeah you hooked that up That shit was dope nice duplex real cozy
Starting point is 00:11:45 Yeah my dream was to keep that Rented Buy and I just couldn't Stop it. I'm doing jokes. I look like a landlord. Are you still working at Verizon? Sort of.
Starting point is 00:11:59 Let's not go there. Did I ever tell you you look like my father? No. Let me show me a picture. I'm going to show you a picture, my dad. You have the same mouth. Is that gay? I mean, guys got a nice mouth.
Starting point is 00:12:14 What do you want? Dude, when I look at you... You see your dad? I see my dad. I never told you that? No, never. Buddy, you look like my fucking dad. It's so weird.
Starting point is 00:12:23 I look at you, and let me see if I get the picture. The fucking new iPhone. God damn. What gadgets do you got? I'm on 17, but I'm not, well, you know, mics and shit. I've been doing a lot of those little mics and shit. I know the best mics to get. Which?
Starting point is 00:12:39 Is the Hollyland? I got them. You knew that when you said, when it came out of your mouth, didn't you know? I already had it. Do you get the DGIs? I got those two. All right. And the roads.
Starting point is 00:12:51 You got the roads? I got them all too. But do you see the new Holly Monk, the little button? That's what I got. Not the button button, the hook button. The hook button is the fucking one to get. So fucking. Holleyland has the best.
Starting point is 00:13:04 They fucking that little hook thing is just boop. The other one that's a, I hate the other thing. The magnet on the ice. Yeah. The button one and you can't even see it. It looks like part of your shirt. Me and you are, we should do it. Always.
Starting point is 00:13:18 We should do a tech podcast. We should do a tech podcast. We absolutely good. Once a month, I already know what it's going to be called. You don't need it. Because that's what my wife says to me. That's a good. Every time I buy one of these stupid things, you don't need it.
Starting point is 00:13:33 But some of them you do. I just got, did you get the displays? No, I didn't. You know why? Because I don't have a studio no more. I told you what my studio. I'm talking about the meta display glasses. No, I think, how do you like them?
Starting point is 00:13:46 I love them. really do they look do they look weird on your face no they look like these really they look just like these okay they look awesome and there's a display in them and do you need them no no you don't need them it's the dumbest thing to have but dude to be sitting on the train listening to my music scrolling through fucking instagram walking down the street reading messages live translate it's cool it's the best all right i'd fuck with that if you're a tech nerd and you don't have the displays if you're a gadget geek like me and you don't have the displays,
Starting point is 00:14:18 then you're not a gadget geek. Because it's hard to get. You've got to go in for an appointment. You've got to go in and get fitted. It's all bullshit, too. Do you want the big ones or the small ones? Because is your head big or is it small? And do you have, do you want the one?
Starting point is 00:14:32 You've got to go in and have an appointment? You've got to have an appointment. They don't just give them to you. Because they don't have a lot of them. They don't have them. So you've got to go on the website. You've got to pick an appointment and show up that day within 30 minutes.
Starting point is 00:14:44 So you missed your point. How much today? What it costs? $800. And I got him and I immediately got him and she was like, why the fuck did you buy these? I was so like, because I don't need them, but I fucking want them. I got to find this photo for you right now. You don't have them on you.
Starting point is 00:14:59 Huh? You don't have them on you. No, I didn't bring him tonight. You know why? Why? Because Max took him and hooked him up to his phone. Oh. And I got to unhook him from his phone.
Starting point is 00:15:08 Where is this photo? Hey, guys, can you scroll through? I'll tell you this fucking thing. This picture right here. Anything. how about that fucking picture oh shit oh that's our friend coming up right now
Starting point is 00:15:20 oh what a goofball this is the problem with Keith he thinks he's such a badass he's just a goofball are you ready let me see holy shit he's kind of got my mouth
Starting point is 00:15:32 he's got your mouth he's got his mouth am I right yeah he's got my mom you look like my dad you look like my sister you got Sicilian or something in you I got I actually
Starting point is 00:15:43 Yeah, my grandfather's 100% Sue. Smile. You look like my fucking dad, dude. Danny, I'm sending you. You're going to put this up. Listen, I'm proud of you. Proud of you. Buddy, don't do that.
Starting point is 00:15:57 Don't do that. Don't do it. I'm in the middle of this shit in therapy right now. Don't do it. Don't fucking say you're proud of me because that's what I wanted all my life. I'm telling you. I'm proud of you. Not as my dad or Dante.
Starting point is 00:16:09 Both. Oh, no. Don't do it. Don't do it. You dig. Danny, don't laugh at this. You did good. No, no, did I?
Starting point is 00:16:18 You did I do good. You did good. I did good, how? You all the time, you did good. Am I doing good now? Yes. Am I a good dad? The son loves you, a good husband.
Starting point is 00:16:29 Why aren't you around? Why can't you be his grandfather? What? Things happened, Bobby. What happened? But I knew you would be strong enough. I knew you would be strong enough to do it. I wasn't. I wasn't strong enough.
Starting point is 00:16:41 But you were. I was. You're here now. I am not. Yeah, you're here. Right now you're here. I love you so much. I love you too.
Starting point is 00:16:48 I fucking love you. I love you. I love you too. I love you. I always thought you was a special boy. You didn't. And I didn't always know how to say it. Are you going to just, you could have me?
Starting point is 00:17:04 I should. I just didn't know how. You could just help me? I didn't know how. My dad didn't get to me. I'm sorry. And I didn't know how, but I would. I'm giving you hugs now
Starting point is 00:17:16 You're a fucking piece of shit But thank you so much Dude I want that so bad I just went through all this stuff In therapy Bobby I'm proud of you too Fuck you, Danny You're not his dad
Starting point is 00:17:33 Mind your business Leave my son alone You don't have my dad's mouth Leave my son alone Thank you dad for protecting me Finally You never stuck up for me I'm here now.
Starting point is 00:17:44 Yeah, but you weren't there then with the second stepdad. We can't go in the back. We can't go back. But I won't let Dan fucking say shit to you. Thank you. Beat the shit out. Can you go hit him for me? I will choke him.
Starting point is 00:17:56 Soon as we get off, I'll choke him. No, do it on the air so I can give fucking likes and follows because that's what I like, Dad. Bobby, I'm proud of you, too, buddy. Is that Joe? Yeah. Can you beat up Joe, too? Sure. Whoever you, listen, son, whoever you, whoever you, whoever,
Starting point is 00:18:13 bothering you. When Keith comes up, can you punch him right? I definitely can punch right in the... On the side he feels it. No, no. I don't want him to see it coming. Where's your dad? He's dead. Did you... Were you friends with him? That's complicated. Why?
Starting point is 00:18:31 So my dad was born 1920. Holy. He was one of 16. Black guys like to bang late life. Eight. Eight boys, eight girls. So my aunt, my aunt was, uh, what the fuck? My aunt was born 19, 1896. One wife?
Starting point is 00:18:51 One wife. One wife. How many kids? 16. 16 kids. Your mom's vagina. My grandmother. Your, what?
Starting point is 00:19:00 Your dad fucked your grandmother? No, my grandmother. Wait a second. My dad's, my dad's mom. He was one of 16. Your father didn't have 16 kids. No, my dad had, we had four. Four.
Starting point is 00:19:12 Okay. Okay. Okay. Three girls with me. Because that was back in the day when you had to fucking. And my dad was a, my grandfather was a bootlegger during the, during the, so like, there was a time when black dude. Like bumpy? Like bumpy? Well, my uncle actually was bumpy's, uh, muscle.
Starting point is 00:19:33 Is that why you're dressed like bumpy right now? I don't know. Well, that's what we can get into that. But the, um, my, my, my, my, my dad's. older brother was very tight with Bumpy in Harlem. Really? Yeah, he was muscle for bumpy. So your dad was muscle?
Starting point is 00:19:51 No, my dad was the little brother. He was the baby boy. What does that mean? Like, so it was 16. So your uncle was the muscle? Yeah. I'm not listening to anything you're saying. I mean, you're saying it, and I'm not even hearing it. It's coming out of your dad's mouth. Because I'm just seeing my dad.
Starting point is 00:20:07 I just want to fucking run. Yes, Dad. We're doing three hours today So let me ask a question So your dad You had 16 Your mom your grandparents had 16 kids On my dad's side Yeah
Starting point is 00:20:24 Because they couldn't have They didn't You just had the babies back then Yeah well it mean You know my How did they afford that? Because they all worked They all
Starting point is 00:20:32 Everybody worked And contributed Right Right Right So my dad was the youngest You had kids To help the family
Starting point is 00:20:38 Yeah that's why you You know That's why you did it And So my old my dad's oldest sister she was born 1896 Jesus Christ dude
Starting point is 00:20:48 Hey that was the old West Yeah That was when they had gun fights Fuck yeah That's crazy My dad and my dad was My dad had rickets That's how old we talk
Starting point is 00:21:00 But it was no milk What's a ricket You know what a ricket I don't know what a ricket So when you have a lack of calcium And like during the depression And you didn't get enough milk Right
Starting point is 00:21:10 So the bones didn't like your bones don't develop. Is that where they got rickety from? Yeah, of course. Rickety. Yeah. And you know that because you read. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:22 Read it, Danny. Ricketts is a condition that causes bones to soften and weaken in children. Most commonly due to a deficiency in vitamin D, calcium, or another word that I don't know. Phosphorus, you fucking idiot. How do you not know that word? I know that word, and I'm the dumbest person in this. room. It sucks when your producer goes, and a word I don't know.
Starting point is 00:21:47 And he's reading it. But he didn't even take a shot. He's reading it. He didn't go sound it out, Danny. What the fuck? You didn't watch Sesame Street. I was scared if I signed it out. Foss?
Starting point is 00:21:56 Foss. For us. You don't think you're stupid if we're going on a word I don't know. You read it perfectly and then a word I don't know that I'm not going to try. Foss? For us. For us. For us.
Starting point is 00:22:07 Foss. For us. Foss. For us. I remember Electica? company um so so your dad your dad was not muscle but he was yeah he was the smallest too but he ended up fucking diesel he used to work out and shit right yeah but my uncle was uh muscle for bumpy and my aunt so you asked me why do i dress like bumpy so my aunt her husband
Starting point is 00:22:33 died in uh probably like 1910 and she uh so she she was a caterer for the nuns and when you couldn't be gay, I'd do a joke about this, when you couldn't be gay, like if you were gay, you got thrown out of the house. Right. And my aunt used to take gay men in and give them a place to stay. Like the Underground Railroad for black people? Well, for gay dudes, anyway. You had the underground gay railroad?
Starting point is 00:22:58 And I had a whole bunch of art. My joke is that I was the only fourth grader with a velvet smoking jacket and a pink ascot. They used to do that. dress me. Of course they did. And they were all, like, and they used to have, like, we weren't around, but, like, they would have these huge gay party, because once they got on their feet, like, gay people, they make money.
Starting point is 00:23:22 What do you mean on their feet? Like, so my aunt picked them up when they were kids, homeless. Oh, okay, okay. And my aunt had three houses, and every one of the houses had a white baby grand piano in it with a chandelier. Was that, because you had to have that if you had
Starting point is 00:23:37 a bunch of gay kids. When the AIDS epidemic happened, oh my God. A lot of them died, and they all bequeathed their houses. My aunt had, like, three houses. Bequeathed? I didn't know gay guys quefed. Oh, they quefe. Oh, they quefe. It's a smoky creakish.
Starting point is 00:23:52 They stayed quefeing. That's a smelly quefe. It don't even stink because it's so... Anyway, no matter. But, yeah, so that... So you lived in it like a gay house. No, I mean, my aunt, when I was going to see my... It was all gay uncles.
Starting point is 00:24:06 Gay uncles? Yeah, that's what they would call you. You know, that's my uncle. And my godfather was gay. Were they flamboyant? Oh, yeah. I mean, I'm looking at you. They had the scarf.
Starting point is 00:24:15 You know, the, remember Scooby-Doo? What was the, the neckerchief? You know, the, you know, the knot, like, old, uh, old porn where they were wearing the neckerchief on the side? Yeah, yeah. Scooby-Doo, was he gay? Probably. So, so is that, and that's where you got your, your style, sense of style, yeah. Your style is from your gay uncles.
Starting point is 00:24:37 Yeah, I had fucking two-tone cowboy boots. Well, let me show a picture. I'll show you a picture of me, like, with all the goofy kids around me, and I got on a blue double-breasted jacket and a knit tie. Really? Oh, yeah. I'm like... Now, how...
Starting point is 00:24:57 Because that's... Because you're pretty... You're one of my, I would say, alpha male friends. You know, I'm weird with that. But, yeah, well, I'll take it. But there's a thing I talk about alpha male, which is not a real thing. What do you mean? So alpha male is this thing where they, you know, it's not a real thing.
Starting point is 00:25:17 When they talked about alpha wolves, it was really the female wolf that was the head of the family. Right. But they thought it was alpha male because she was dominant over everybody. So that doesn't exist. But when they talk about alpha males, you know what they talk about that, the guy who's, but it's, I feel like alpha males are insecure. So there's something called a Sigma Mail, right? Right. So Alpha males, they're always got to be in the front, aggressive, always.
Starting point is 00:25:48 But if you're always aggressive, it's usually because you're insecure about not being in control. Right. Where a Sigma Mail can take the situation and step back and let, so if you are better at building stuff. Yeah. And we're stranded on, I let you do what you do, and I'm not threatened by the fact that you do something. that I don't do. Right. Whereas an alpha male would be like,
Starting point is 00:26:12 I got a, you know. Right. Or they micromanage. Right. When they do stuff. Right. Okay. So I'm, I can.
Starting point is 00:26:20 So there's no alpha wolf. No. It's a myth. I mean, there's the dominant wolf, yes. But when they did that study, there's a whole thing with it. We were studying the wolves with what they saw was really the mother that was running.
Starting point is 00:26:34 There's a lot of ass in here. Show me the. Yes, before you show me your gay pictures. Yeah, there's a nice little set of nice. Wow, those are nice. They are really nice. Wow, I wish I had those on my phone. I wish I had a friend that would send me pictures.
Starting point is 00:26:53 I know you can't. Sure I can. I know you can. Sure I can. I want you to. How many tities do you have on your phone? A lot. A lot.
Starting point is 00:27:04 What do you do with it? They're just there from years. Oh, here it is. Look at this. What are you in the middle? I should send it to Danny. Oh, my God, dude. You were a good-looking young boy.
Starting point is 00:27:18 But you see the knit tie and the... You have the little handkerchief. Yeah, little... And all these other dudes are just dressed up regular. They have like a regular uniform. And you are pimping at that age. Yeah. Look at dude.
Starting point is 00:27:33 Look at you, a fro. You are a good-looking young dude. Thank you, bro. And they never, ever try. tried to uh fucking uh no no not once you know who tries to you always said you did you went to catholic school right yep didn't they have a fruity priest in there a fruit pop i'll tell you what i didn't have one in school when i went to i got kicked out of catholic school okay twice all right uh no once in fifth grade um they had speaking of beta males here's a beta male's here's a beta male
Starting point is 00:28:05 showing up. What up, Beta Mail? Is he a Beta Mail or a Sigma? He's definitely not a Sigma. He's not a Sigma. He's a fucking question mark. He's, is he the wolf
Starting point is 00:28:19 in the back of the pack that waits for everybody to eat? Donta, can he send me that picture so I can put him in post? Yeah, yeah. Everybody, Keith Robinson is here. I eat. You what? I eat. I eat first.
Starting point is 00:28:34 Yeah, you're eating downstairs. forever, you son of a bitch. I had two strokes, man. What the fuck? You're going to stop relying on that. I had two strokes. I know you did. This is college.
Starting point is 00:28:45 Oh, my God. Let me see that. Dante was a fucking... He was jamming, dude. I'm a better pimp to Dante. Shut up. You always bought shit for women. I always know.
Starting point is 00:28:57 Ha, ha. Ha, ha, beta male. You were a what? A pimp. You weren't a pimp. You weren't a pimp. I was a pimp. You were a pimp when it was easy to be a pimp? Two weeks.
Starting point is 00:29:09 When you were a pimp for two weeks? No. Nobody's a pimp for two weeks. No, I... Would you make 60 bucks? 32, 75. No, what I would do, I try to be a pimp. With who?
Starting point is 00:29:25 I was 16. You can't be a pimp in 16? Yes, you can. You'll tell you that. It could happen. Now, what it didn't happen. Well, I was a fit for like, you know, I try to, I ain't know how to become a fence. I thought that you did chores.
Starting point is 00:29:44 And that's the problem. You did what? The chores for the prostitutes first. What? Chores. You would do the laundry? Would you make their beds? You want me to go to the store?
Starting point is 00:29:55 You want to Dr. Pepper? Hey, bitch, I just made your bed with hospital corners, and I cleaned up your room with a sweeper. She's like, I don't sell some pussy for you. Go get that pussy. No. I did the dishes, motherfucker. That's how you get that confidence. What?
Starting point is 00:30:09 You get that confidence first. Then you turn on them. But you never turned on them. You just did the source for... We had a huge argument because I said, I told him... It was a whole bunch of people arguing, and I was like, pimps get turned out by hoes. What?
Starting point is 00:30:28 So you don't get made... You don't decide you want to be a pimp. I decide. That's why it didn't work. Oh, the motherfucker? You don't know. Fuck this asshole, tell me. If I'm not offended.
Starting point is 00:30:41 He sounds like an alpha male. I don't know. He talked about that, right? He sounds very alpha. Oh, let me see this. You never had this shit going on, Keith. Oh, shit. This guy's, Dante's wearing a cowboy hat.
Starting point is 00:30:56 It looks like... In Brooklyn. He looks like Black Holiday. This motherfucker's... Not there was a soap opera. I mean, dude, you got no photos of that. What? I got a picture of me spacking a bitch.
Starting point is 00:31:15 Oh, is that what a bit does? With my stroke hand. Someone on the live is saying, did Keith say he's a simp? No. Oh, that makes sense. You're a sim. I'm sorry. I misunderstood you, Keith.
Starting point is 00:31:28 Fuck whoever's online. Whoever's online, fuck him. Now, what I'll do, I got that confidence. I go to the store, I go to the store for them, get them chocolates. You know, and I help energy. The chocolate will help to get the energy. Then you switch it up. And I gave my grandmom's peanut frontal.
Starting point is 00:31:54 I got a hook on. What was this in the 30s? When did you give bitches peanut butter? She was like 23 skidoo. I made her a pie and I let it sit out on the window. Hill. He's like, now you send him in Jackson? You want to play some hot scotch bitch.
Starting point is 00:32:09 They got hooked on my gram. They love my gram. Who wouldn't? You hooked them like crack? Was that the original crack? Peanut brittles? They love peanut brittles. Homemade peanut brittal.
Starting point is 00:32:23 They love them. What, do you have a lot of fat? And I go, do you want to take? How'd that work out, though? How'd that work? Is it yes, Daddy? Before I give you enough to taste, you got to sell something, you know what I mean? No, what do you mean, Daddy?
Starting point is 00:32:43 Like what? Like fruit? Your grandmother's peanut brittles? That's why I turned to the pen that I... And then what did you do? I said, do you want peanut or not? I want peanut brittle or not. I want peanut brittle, Daddy.
Starting point is 00:33:00 What do I got to do? Spit it out. That's right before my stroke. He said, you got to have relations. He couldn't say sex then. He couldn't say that. You want to have relations. You got to go out and have relations with the governor.
Starting point is 00:33:20 I want you to get Randy with the mayor and the chief of police. I got to run my moonshine and my grandma with his peanut bittle down to Texarkana. Well, that's what it was, man You stop acting You would never They knew I was dangerous They knew I was dangerous I was the most dangerous
Starting point is 00:33:44 Pimp ever You did the same moves Pedophiles This guy never had Peanut brittles He never had no peanut brittal I tell you what he had He had abs
Starting point is 00:33:53 I had abs You had not You had never I've had abs You had abs when you were two No I had ass man When you were doing the peanut brittal How'd you have abs eating all that peanut brittal?
Starting point is 00:34:05 No, my grandmother's special. You didn't get high in your own supply? Yeah. I tried to give them a little piece. Yeah. Yeah, let me send my abs to that. And they went to, they went and they sold it for you. Did you get anybody?
Starting point is 00:34:22 Did you make any money? No. I got a hooked on. I got a hooked on a peanut bread. So all you do is give a bunch of whores diabetes. They lost a foot. And then he had to discount the pussy because he ain't have one foot. You want to fuck a bitch with one foot?
Starting point is 00:34:40 No. No. 10.50. And I'll give you some peanut. That way, he couldn't run away. Yeah, I do know what you mean. And die when I get to. That don't make no sense.
Starting point is 00:34:54 It does make sense, man. Here's what I was saying. I was saying to him that they turn you out. Who turned them out? The girl will turn you out. Well, how? So, like, you know how, like, you can't imagine being a pimp. Like, you could never imagine, like, how you ask somebody to sell pussy.
Starting point is 00:35:10 You don't. It's somebody who already is selling pussy. And then they'll go. Okay. I'll be like, oh, my car is fucked up. And then they go, oh, what's, what's wrong? And then I need this money for this new turbo. And they was like, I'll get you the money.
Starting point is 00:35:30 Turbo, what is it, 85? It was 83 At least it wasn't Peter Biddle that Oh I would have something wrong In my car I need money or whatever And there we go
Starting point is 00:35:41 He would pull up on a horse and buggy They would like You know bitch You want some peanut brittle Daddy you need some oats But they They offer to Buy your shit
Starting point is 00:35:56 For some change Strange for some change Yeah Okay so wait a Well, those are girls that can be turned out. What do you mean? No, no, no. They're already there.
Starting point is 00:36:06 A real pen. Like, I'll get a, I'll turn a, I'll turn a nun out. What? He's for the. Why would you say? Why would you want to turn a nun out? Them holes win it. They got to have it.
Starting point is 00:36:23 Is the peanut brittle? Them holes got to have it. But that's a real pen. Are you saying that his girl? A real pin. His one. They were going to sell that pussy. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:36:34 You're a talking girl who made a vow to Jesus Christ. For our Lord and Savior. And she wasn't even thinking about selling a business. She was like, that's a real pimp. I got to get this. It ain't no real pimp. Right, yeah, that's a pimp. She had to have that peanut brothel.
Starting point is 00:36:51 That bitch, that nun, she never had peanut bitter before. Wait did she get my grandmother's peanut bittle. But you never made money as a pimp. I made, I made a little money. How much you make? Wow. Talking to the microphone, stupid. I'm about 760.
Starting point is 00:37:11 No, I made about 400. 400 is good. For what? We're buying a Honda Civic? And in 70. A gremlin. He bought a huge gremlin. He bought a BMX bike.
Starting point is 00:37:26 He bought a Huffy. Yeah, man, I need that new Huffy. He bought an Apollo 5. Speed. I got to go buy some corn syrup for my grandmother's peanut bread. You made $400 bucks off a girl selling her body for you. Yeah. Now, why did you get out?
Starting point is 00:37:43 He doesn't want to say that because he wants to be friends with Amy. Oh, yeah, that's right. Yeah, you better shut your mouth. Because there ain't nobody listens to this. You got a middle-aged guy in England going, I heard Kaythe. Cah. Kave? Amy, I need to talk to you. Amy, I don't know if you hope.
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Starting point is 00:39:06 That's cornbread That's cornbread hemp.com slash dude And use code dude. I got girls to do stuff But I never, I would never even dream Patrice used to talk about that shit Yeah, Patrice wasn't a pimp. No, Patrice
Starting point is 00:39:21 The girls. Tris was a John. He was a trick. He was a trick. If you buy pussy, you're a trick. Oh, watch your mouth. No offense. I mean no offense. Watch your mouth. You're a trick. He's a trick. No, that's right. I have a John name. I'm so good with mine.
Starting point is 00:39:41 What? Keith. My John name is Patrick. Ewing. Dean Marcus. What? D. Markis. Patrick Dean Watkins. Patrick Dean Watkins. De Marcus. De Marcus. Your That's my John name. Is that your John name or your pimp? What's your pimp? What's your pimp name? K doll Anytime he pauses he's lying I'm not lying He pauses a lot Yeah
Starting point is 00:40:10 They call me Kay Delicious You know I was actually Under surveillance What This is real shit I was under surveillance For the FBI
Starting point is 00:40:25 For what I had a friend for doing drugs selling drugs across state lines and all that and they start getting torn as friends RICO
Starting point is 00:40:40 trying to get the RICO when they got them going to take across state line and all that and they put surveillance on me but at the same time I was on FBI surveillance my kid's mom was surveillance
Starting point is 00:40:54 because you're a piece of shit and she did a way way better job She knew everything Was your wife on you back? Who is on? She was on me Oh my God
Starting point is 00:41:10 She loved everything Women are investigators She did She knew everything You ever watch a like a crime show With a woman And they know They solve it in the first five minutes
Starting point is 00:41:22 Because they have to have a different Intuitiveness for patterns What? Like, anytime a woman gets a guy's number, right? Anytime you get the guy's numbers. It's hard to, listen, you talk, and it's very sophisticated and internet. But you're dressed like a Black Panthers soldier, and it fucks me up. I'm just saying, like my eelskin.
Starting point is 00:41:43 I do love it a lot. I like it a lot. A little eel skin, you know. If you can zip it, I'd give you $100,000. It might be able. I don't know. Been a while. Nah.
Starting point is 00:41:51 Yeah, yeah, I can get it. I can get it. He did that to me on stage one night. I was feeling good. I had a jacket on and I brought him up he goes Bob
Starting point is 00:42:00 he goes if you can zip your jacket I'll give you 400 cash and you took out the money and I tried to zip it I was a button and I got three buttons and the crowd was like oh
Starting point is 00:42:11 oh oh oh no what were you saying I don't remember that you were saying go ahead I didn't tell you about my surveillance they they thought
Starting point is 00:42:27 Because we got cheese steaks from the same place. Cheese steaks, brittle, peanut brittles, and chocolate. They say, y'all both want to overbrook pizza. What was that? Yeah. He said, and the guy, you know, he said, no, it's a cheesecake place. Look, let us know. What let you go, let us know is he Mr. Big.
Starting point is 00:42:54 That's without Mr. Big. You were Mr. Big? Yeah, they thought that I was missing. I'm driving a 72 Pullman's skin. I'm not Mr. Bing. No, you were K-Dog. C-Doh, because he was called K-Dog because he gave the whores hot dogs. Yo, bitch, you want a hot dog from K-Dog?
Starting point is 00:43:16 Or you used to rob prostit. What? Wrong. Why? Money? Yeah, but why? But why would you run? Why do you rob it?
Starting point is 00:43:28 Because when you can't talk them out of the money, you got to, you got to rough them up, steal it from the property. I don't understand any of this. Yeah, you do. No, I don't. You've been a lot of prostities. Yeah, but here's the problem with you, and I've been to prostitutes with you. And this is the one thing about black people that I love. Well, stop the black people.
Starting point is 00:43:47 Why are we got to put a color toy? Because you're black? You know what I love about white people? What? Nothing. I was about to just make it. You can tell me if I'm right or wrong. Okay, go.
Starting point is 00:44:08 White people will just pay. You go up. Black people will bargain. They negotiate. Why not? They like to negotiate. The price is not the price until you say it's the price. But when I, I knew this when I went into.
Starting point is 00:44:22 Ben's pizza with Patrice one night and I got a slice of pizza and he went to the guy he goes how much is a slice of pizza and he said two bucks he goes how much for a meat patty he said 250 he goes how much for a meat patty and a slice of pizza
Starting point is 00:44:37 and the guy went huh it's $4.50 he goes I give you $4 he goes what if I give you what if I get a half a slice of pizza and a half of meat patty I'm like he's like I can't do that and he goes now he's already confused
Starting point is 00:44:52 So you can get anything from him now. He got a half of meat patty and a half a size of pizza for three bucks. I don't know. He did it. That's not, man with the cooch. But he did the same thing. We went to a massage paula because he was one of the pieces of shit that got me into massage paullers, one of them. And he went in and I walked out and I was like, man, $120 is a lot.
Starting point is 00:45:13 He goes, I paid $60. The lady hated him. Hated. We walked out. Go, go, go, go, go, go. My girl. love me. She made it actually.
Starting point is 00:45:24 And you tipped her too, right? Yeah, it was 60 bucks for the massage and I gave her 120. Because, you know, I won a good karma. This guy was in there going, nah. You're getting 60 and you like it. Well, that's a, you know, you got to treat them, you know. I'm a pimp. What?
Starting point is 00:45:43 I'm a pimp. At the end of the day, I'm a pimp. It's just in you. When they ask more, I get mad. You get mad. Yeah. Right. So if you go to a massage parlor and they want 70 bucks, you're getting it down to 50. 50.
Starting point is 00:46:01 50 bucks. Maybe 45. Why 45? You know, pimping is a really conservative business. What? Three parts. Okay. You got the pimp who gets the money from the hoe.
Starting point is 00:46:12 Right. You got the hoe that sells the pussy. And the trick. Stop calling it's a trick. It pays the money. You have the trick. Or the job. You're the John.
Starting point is 00:46:22 All right. The client. How about that? I like John. All right. So the John. So, but you can't, you can't dabble between. Right.
Starting point is 00:46:34 You have to be the pimp or the John. You got to be one of the other wives to tell Patrice all the time. Like, you can't, like, you can't say you're a pimp if you pay for pussy. And he paid for pussy. Wait, wait, one, whoa, whoa, whoa. Have you ever paid for pussy? Me? No.
Starting point is 00:46:48 You're a lying. Like out and out, exchange your pussy. And I. No, no. Have you ever exchanged money? No, never. Never. Never. Never. Wait a minute. Hold up. I was a male stripper for 10 years. I don't give a damn. I was a male stripper.
Starting point is 00:47:04 You have everything. How come I didn't see you? You were never. You was everything that I was. You were never a male. Would you show up? Was you your little thing peanut brittle? I was a male stripper for 22 years. Daddy, did I say you? It was 22, yeah.
Starting point is 00:47:23 Look at that. Stop playing. Look at, where's your photos and when you were a male stripper like that? What were you, what was your name in that? Mandingo. Man dingo. You were a man, little dingo.
Starting point is 00:47:36 What was your name? Mighty Mouse? Where I called? They were said mud bone. No, but it is. Talking to the microphone, dumb, dump. I'll take the mic to you. Fuck the mic.
Starting point is 00:47:49 You need the mic. We're recording this. I don't need no. Let me ask you a question. You were a pimp. He's a trick. You're a trick. You don't like that, do you?
Starting point is 00:47:59 Don't want to call it. Dante, please stop calling him a trick. Stop calling me a trick. But a trick is a trick. You're a trick. You're a trick. Call me a trick one more time, man. Trick and trick.
Starting point is 00:48:16 And you got peanut brittle? Any peanut brittle, chicken treat. So you're a male stripper? I'm not 22 years. What town were you a male stripper in? Huh? You heard me, motherfucker. Stop stalling.
Starting point is 00:48:32 What's shit? Paris, Pennsylvania. What's that? Venezuela, Connecticut. Allentown, PA. He used to strip for the clan. Rome, New York. Hey, make that color god dance.
Starting point is 00:48:52 He did a little soft shoe. Hey, he took a little time step. He took all his clothes off except his tap shoes. And his dress socks. He got one of a little sand. Buddy, he had sand in his pocket. He put it down. Hey, boys.
Starting point is 00:49:13 I drew a line. You drew a line? No dance for men. You didn't dance for men. Dante dance for men. No, he didn't. He never danced for men. He never danced for men.
Starting point is 00:49:24 Ask him. What? Whoa. What? So it was a dude. He's a piece of shit. So it was a dude, this doctor had this doctor convention. He booked a bunch of strippers.
Starting point is 00:49:38 And they were all like professional doctors. Right? And I booked the dancers. And I, but I didn't let nobody touch me. Like I would stay in the middle. Bullshit. And they didn't like me. Bullshit.
Starting point is 00:49:55 They didn't like me because I was, I was homophobic and I wouldn't let them, I wouldn't go close to them. And they were trying to tip me. I was like, mm-mm. Let's break this down. Let's break this gay. Come on a trick, tell me. Let's break this gay doctor festival down. Donne was a tease.
Starting point is 00:50:18 I was a tease. Which is, I was a tease. I will give you that. I wasn't teased. Bobby, we found a picture of Keith back in the day when he was a male stripper. Oh, no, shit. Let's see it. Let's look on the TV.
Starting point is 00:50:30 That is Keith. Is that K-Dog? That's K-Dog in the house. A Jerry girl. There you go. There you go. So. What Dante was dancing for Donald Crom.
Starting point is 00:50:45 What'd you say? You don't think Dante, you think Dante was just a tease that night? I was a tease. Oh, that must have bummed them out. They were pissed. When he came out and he came out with that big swang? I stayed right in the middle. Right in the middle?
Starting point is 00:51:00 I just kept my head down. It was like, wow, he dances good. Come on. I was like. Did they try to come over? I was in the middle of the floor. So they would, like, hold it up. Right?
Starting point is 00:51:13 And you were supposed to go get it. I wouldn't go get it. You wouldn't go get it? Dante got it. You think a big, a nice white neurosurgeon stuck with a little pecker in his butt? Let me just hold it for a second, mandingo. So you did guys one time and they didn't. And I used to just book it and send other dudes.
Starting point is 00:51:39 Did they let them touch it? Some of them, yeah. They would drag them, them gay dudes on the floor, hump them from behind. Had some relief. Dante, what? Release the files, Donda. Release the balls. We got Dante files.
Starting point is 00:52:00 Dante? Dante's got... They've been redacted arrest. We need to protect the victims. So these guys, you go dance. So the guys that were dancing were gay? Yeah. But, no, the guys that didn't.
Starting point is 00:52:13 No, they were actually straight, but they needed money. So these guys would let guys do things to them for, for money? No, like they would dance and they would, you know, they would hump the dudes and, like, hump them with their clothes on. There's some gaining going on. Stop that.
Starting point is 00:52:27 There's got to be some gainers in that. Look, there was some guys that would make a shitload of money. And you didn't know how? Oh, I knew how. They used to pull a dick out and fucking beat the dudes with the dick and all kinds of crazy shit. I couldn't...
Starting point is 00:52:41 That's gay. I couldn't hit a guy with my dick. I'd have to get mushed in his cheek. You'd have to thumb it in like gum You know, I used to stick gum Under the table I couldn't beat a guy with anything God damn it
Starting point is 00:52:59 There's no way So I would just book it And they would do it every year I don't think Keith I don't give him a fuck about I don't give a fuck about Keith Did you know that? No, no no no
Starting point is 00:53:11 Whenever he's destined to be giving it so much I got a little history on Dante He grew up and he had had five gay uncles. Oh. His mom, his mom, his aunt, his aunt had a, uh, a refuge for
Starting point is 00:53:24 gay men back in the day when it was hard to be gay. In the 70s. He had the underground railroad for gay people. And he was raised by a gay. It was a carriage. He was raised by gay dudes. That's why, wait a minute, look at his clothes. I don't want to know his
Starting point is 00:53:40 aunt's name for him. His aunt's name? Dorsey, DePyster. Nero. De Pist. The Pais. What a good middle name. No, no, no. What?
Starting point is 00:53:50 No, no. What? What's the gay name you gave me? Yeah. What was your little... What was your... Gay guys always give a nickname. My name is Dante.
Starting point is 00:53:59 That's gay enough. Keith, that's pretty gay. Dante. My godfather was gay. His name was Richard Boone. He used to laugh like this. Wait a minute. I was to laugh like that.
Starting point is 00:54:14 How do he laugh? Mm-hmm. That's a godfather My godfather That's the way Norton laughs now Oh my god That was funny So you don't
Starting point is 00:54:26 You've never had a problem with gay guys You grew up with him Nah I just didn't bother me And then And then it just wasn't You know like you know Like oh I'm I'm afraid to Keith
Starting point is 00:54:37 He's afraid of gay guys I'm not afraid of gay guys Talking to the microphone Dumb Dumb Can you bring Can you give him I'm not afraid of gay guys You're not
Starting point is 00:54:47 No Have you Have you ever the gay guy hit on you? Yeah I bet you did Tell that No no no Tell that story
Starting point is 00:54:55 Well Tell that story Yeah K dog K delicious Ha Did he give you that nickname You're delicious
Starting point is 00:55:04 Daddy Delicious You taste like You taste like licorice Why do Why is your dick Why's your dick Why's your dick
Starting point is 00:55:11 You know my Why Why did Big got bumps on like peanut brittle I couldn't get it out your dick tastes like peanut like peanut brittle
Starting point is 00:55:23 you rub your dick and peanut pillow to get me all wowed up my teacher can you give him you want to hold the mic you guys slide the chair up can you help Keith please one of you fucks get up slide the chair
Starting point is 00:55:38 man man Joe Help him you fuck Jesus my guests are helping these people Right at the table. All right. I don't spill your milk. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:51 Don't dump your peanut butter on the ground. I bet he still uses peanut butter to get pussy. He got a sippy cup. You go over his house, she's like, there's some peanut butter on the table when you're done. I wasn't going to graduate. We knew that. We knew that, you dumbed up.
Starting point is 00:56:07 That ain't news. Yeah. We never thought you graduated. I skipped that part. Let me take that back. I didn't graduate. We know. My teacher said he asked me to sit on his lap.
Starting point is 00:56:23 Oh, to go. Is that where you got your Peter Piddle technique? He said he could do something. He could do something for you, really. And you love a bargain. And I, you know, I sat on his lap and hooded around a little bit. No, no, no. You were a stripper.
Starting point is 00:56:45 You mushed it in? Did you, and you never saw summer school. No. He says, he said, psych. No. What do he say? What do you do? No, I didn't do that, but I said, no, I can't do that.
Starting point is 00:57:05 How much joy would it give you to know that Keith was just moving around on some teachers? My God. With plaid pants. It had to be 71. Some plaid bell bottom. Just see a little goofy keys mushing a peaches cock into his butt butt
Starting point is 00:57:20 That's the only way you can come now If he sits on a hot dog on a chair I mean that's a pretty amazing story though That you had all these gay uncles And your family Was so None of them to touch you?
Starting point is 00:57:41 Nah No I got lucky, bro I ain't gonna lie Yeah, but gay guys The gay guys are gay The gay guy in my Catholic school Was the brother
Starting point is 00:57:51 Brother James And he You stick Like he was the wrestling coach Oh boy That's not And how you know how he got you He would be like
Starting point is 00:58:00 Who wants to help me Put the mats away And you had to be like I got him I got homework Like get the fuck out Keith would have And just sat on his lap
Starting point is 00:58:09 And bushed in You need a little help And the guy would be like I'm not that gay I remember the gay preacher? Who? Which one? Which one?
Starting point is 00:58:21 Yeah, Bishop Long. Eddie Long. Like, once you went up on an airplane, when you got like 20, 30, 30. He'd be like, they'd be like, I'm not gay. He'd be like, well, you get, I hope you can fly. We're a cruising altitude right now,
Starting point is 00:58:38 and it's okay for you guys to get up and suck each other's car. But they're like, I'm not doing it. So, well. Oh, my god He was He was grooming them He bought them bentleys and all kinds
Starting point is 00:58:52 Oh, I'd suck a dick for a Bentley I'd suck a dick for a belly You'd pull up in front of my house Where's your truck? I'll tell you later Don Look at the roof Look at the roof of the car Don'll be like
Starting point is 00:59:05 Can I get one? Like fuck that I'd be like, no You suck dick lousy They might take my back. She came back with a Hyundai. He gave me a Hyundai. A steady bike. You don't just go up and down. You got to look at it and suck it and look at them in the eyes. Spit on it, you dumb dumb. He can't store it. You can't suck it to your mouth goes dry.
Starting point is 00:59:32 Have you, now, let me ask you question. Is that the only time you've ever, I had one time when I was my sister when we were, when my father, my mother finally divorced the first stepdad who was kind of abusive and she was all for i was all fucked up she was all fucked up uh but i was young he's three years younger than her and she wound up hanging out with the uh goth before before it was god it was uh the rocky horror pitcher yeah yeah and there was you know gay guys and weird chicks corsets and yeah weird stuff and she hung out with all these people and they had a they had a car they had a four-door Chevy big one of those big Chevy and they named it massingale and that was the name of the car massingale I don't know what the fuck that was and there was one guy with like black hair and he they used to sing the rocky
Starting point is 01:00:22 heart pitch of stuff and they knew the whole thing they knew the whole thing and they would go to it and stuff like that and there was a house around the corner from our apartment where we lived and there was a gay guy that lived there and uh and that's where they would all kind of hang out and congregate around the corner and he had a little sister that was a little younger than me and she was cute and i would go over there she would have to bring me over there once in a while and i would go over there and hang out with the sister and stuff like that and one day my mother was like go get your sister over whatever the whole and i went over there and she wasn't there but he was there it was a little skinny white gay guy and he was like hey scarf no no scarf and he came and he was
Starting point is 01:01:05 like come on in and i was like hey what's up And his little sister wasn't there. I was like, hey, he, blah, blah, blah. No, come on in, blah, blah, blah. And I went into the room. There was a room with all mattresses. And I'm young, so I was like, this looks fun. So I just went in and started jumping.
Starting point is 01:01:20 Jumping around. Yeah, jumping on mattresses. And I jumped and I was lying down on the mattresses and he jumped down on with me. Not knowing that I just jumped into some jizz orgy pit that was there last night. I was like, why do you have all the mattresses here? And he lied down next to me.
Starting point is 01:01:35 He's like, we had a little party here. He's like nose to nose and me Crazy. Yeah, he was like, you know, we had fun. You know, just a bunch of him. And you go, what kind of fun? I like fun. I made it out of that room.
Starting point is 01:01:55 I was like, I think I have to go. I got his vibe. He's like, you can stay. I was like, I want to go. I'm going to go. Huh? Did you touch his? No.
Starting point is 01:02:05 I ran home. I ratted my sister out like a piece. piece of shit. I was like, he has mattresses. And my mother, like, what the fuck does he have? She's just Boston. Where the, you're not going over there anymore. I didn't go back over. I really like that mattress room, though. It's cool. Oh, wow.
Starting point is 01:02:20 And I lived, I used to work with retarded, mentally retarded people. And on the weekends, I would What? Special Ed. Special Ed. Why did you wish for that and show them? He said it like, he didn't say retardant. Well, because I went through the gamut of it. Yeah, yeah, I remember. It was retarded.
Starting point is 01:02:37 And it was meant MR. It was mentally retarded, then it was MR, and it was special. Now it's most, what is it now? Well, it's all supposed to, it mostly was disturbed. This was different. So I worked with them. I loved it. It was a great job.
Starting point is 01:02:50 One of my best jobs ever. And I would work weekends at the other house. And the guy that was me at that house, I lived in the house with him. And I had your primary house parent. Exactly. What do you wear for D.F.Y? I forget what it was, but something like that in Boston. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:03:05 And I was there. I had to work five days a week. I had Friday and Saturdays off to do comedy. And I only had to be there from 11 to 8 in the morning. You work two days. I worked five days. I just had to wake them up and make sure they were out. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 01:03:18 But they were high functioning. So they got up by themselves. It was an easiest job ever, but the guys were great. I loved the guy. I did that in Poughkeepsie. Yeah, it was great. I loved it. And I made very little money, but they paid for all my food and blah, blah, blah.
Starting point is 01:03:30 But I would do overnights at the other house for the guy that was me. So Friday nights, he worked weekend. I would work a Friday night or if I didn't have a gig. And I remember he was a little zesty, a lot zesty. I remember one night I was, I didn't understand, I didn't understand like gay guys until this point where I was looking for the remote one night and I had a couple of my friends over and I was like, I sometimes he has it in the room. So I went in his room and I'm looking around for the remote and for the TV.
Starting point is 01:04:06 and I found a duffel bag, a big duffel bag, and I opened it up, and it was full of just huge dicks. But like big ones and a can of lard, like a tupperware thing of lard. And I just picked it up. I shouldn't have. Yeah. And it slipped. It slipped out my hand.
Starting point is 01:04:27 But I was so immature. I went in the other room, I go, dude, look at this. And I just had like two fucking huge gildos of, uh, Now, you got to be clear, just because you're gay, doesn't make you a pedophile. No. Being a pedophile. But it's like, but you don't, in fact, most gay men are not. Well, let's talk about, Bob, holding the dildos, juggling dildos.
Starting point is 01:04:53 Dude, it wasn't gay. I was holding it in my mouth. I was like, guy. One in each hand and one. Where was the law that? I was like, where was the law? all the scoop of it was in my butt cheeks. The guy came home, we just saw three finger scoops in it.
Starting point is 01:05:12 Those aren't mine. But they had, I remember, I lived with, I had a gay rumor for a while, too. He tried to get me to fucking sleep with him all the time. I would just wake up and he would, just a silhouette into my door. And he would be like, no, he would just be like, Bobby. And I'd be like, what's up, man? What's up, Brian? He was the coolest guy.
Starting point is 01:05:36 He was starting to be a weatherman And he's the one who told me that most weathermen are gay I never knew that but now Look at weathermen Yeah, yeah All gay Gerald champion And he was in my door
Starting point is 01:05:47 He was Bobby Can I snuggle with you? I was like, no, bro, you can't He's like I just want to snuggle I feel sad tonight And I just want to snuggle And I was like, brie
Starting point is 01:05:57 You can't snuggle with me, bro I'm sorry He's like, why not I don't have sex with you I just want to snuggle Snuggling's not gay I'm like, bro, it's gay Because if you lie next to him
Starting point is 01:06:11 I'm going to fuck the shit out of you I'm going to put it deep in your ass, son He's like, woo, Yeah, gay He was like I know Keith has some stories Can I snuggle with you?
Starting point is 01:06:29 He wanted to snuggle. Nobody wants to snuggle with Not even gay dudes Like this guy, Brider did he was feminine He wouldn't snuggled Nobody wants to Nobody wants to
Starting point is 01:06:38 Nobody wants to snuggle Gay guys don't want to They just want to fuck him and leave Nobody does Snuggle You're gone You want to leave Guys where you go
Starting point is 01:06:50 I have peanut prittle I have a whole stack of peanut brittle From the 70s I didn't lose From my pimping days For my two weeks of pimping I don't know man
Starting point is 01:07:00 That's wild That you grew up in that world and then you Now you don't You don't pimp You don't do shit like that Now you have a show On teaching men
Starting point is 01:07:11 How to be a man Yes sir Right Yeah Now does Keith ever Can we get him Like a seminar Keith
Starting point is 01:07:18 Keith is a pussy Whoa Whoa Keith Keith be trying to be tough But he ain't tough He's He will
Starting point is 01:07:27 I'm gonna have to fight Don Hey What is true He's He's nicer than he would like That he wants him to people and know Yeah, Keith is a nice person You are a nice person
Starting point is 01:07:39 Now watch him get quiet He pieces of shit Now What about the dildos? I never held two dildos In your mouth In my hand See how you get so uncomfortable
Starting point is 01:07:55 When you start telling him he's a good person Oh it makes him weird He can't look at him You fuck it No no no no Keith you're a good guy You twerk He called you a trick
Starting point is 01:08:04 You can't even You're a trick corp Take it No Why can't you take it man Because he can't Look at Dante Me and Keith
Starting point is 01:08:12 Me and Keith Best of French Look at Keith Watch him Keith Look at him Why are you afraid Because he can't
Starting point is 01:08:18 He can't I don't I don't say What I have a lot of Enron It's pronounce it A lot of
Starting point is 01:08:27 What's that word again Intimacy Intimacy It's not uncomfortable he is. He's so intimidated. Why can't you take it, Keith? Because I'm not a faggot. I knew that was it.
Starting point is 01:08:42 This is Patreon only. God damn it. Let me ask you questions. I want to show you a video. I don't know what you'd take is on this, but I saw all the stuff because we have, I feel like we've got over gay.
Starting point is 01:09:00 stuff a long time ago. Nobody gives a fuck anymore. You'd be gay. Nobody can't... Like, the hardest of guys don't give a shit anymore. Yeah. Really? Sure.
Starting point is 01:09:10 It's like... Nobody care about them. The hardest of guys care about them getting shit. What do you mean? What do you say? What's going on now
Starting point is 01:09:22 when people talk about you know, bombing that knew nothing from black folks. But they did something for the LNG. He means he killed people. Right. They're on that now. The right and all that on.
Starting point is 01:09:41 They're getting stuff that they're not supposed to get. What are they getting? What are they getting that they're not supposed to get? That's what they're saying. Right, yeah, yeah, yeah. They're saying, you know, the health coverage, the sex change stuff, which is not true. And it's such a small percentage. It's ridiculous.
Starting point is 01:09:56 Well, this, like, this men and women's sports, though, do you get, I mean, I mean, I get it, but you're never going to get a guy who, on the elite level, is going to have the respect if they make that transition. This, this right here, man wins women's strongest, world's strongest woman. Is this worlds? This is worlds. Are you sure it's worlds? It says it right there. I don't think so.
Starting point is 01:10:22 It's world's strongest women. And I want you to look to the left that this black woman. She's pissed. She's so mad. Watch. Now, look, that, that dude looks like Big J.O.O.C. Look at that. Now, watch her.
Starting point is 01:10:37 She's like, fuck. Look, she's like, I'm out. She's pissed. She should be. Why? Because it's just, the other one was a, was biologically born a man? Yeah. And, that's why.
Starting point is 01:10:57 Well, look, here's the thing. Yeah. You, one of the reasons why they get, why people, you know, people who get sex change get it early is because they want to get it before the secondary pubescent phase. Right. Because the secondary pubescent is when your bones get thicker, your jaw lying, so you get pubic hair and stuff like that. Okay. So that's why they do the blockers early so that they don't, they don't, because once you become a dude, right? And physically you go through your second phase of pubescent, secondary pubescent phase.
Starting point is 01:11:35 You can't do nothing with that. You have big shoulders, big feet, big hands. So that's why they do the blockers early. They don't want them to go into that. Being a man. Yeah, like physically, chemically becoming a man. Right, but it's what? I think you should know.
Starting point is 01:11:56 There are certain rules in the game. if you want to become a man and it doesn't mean you can get to participate in female sports. Right. And that...
Starting point is 01:12:13 It's going to be... You've got a different... My thing is, you have to think about this what the objective is. Remember when everybody was talking about bathrooms? Yeah. Now, what do you have? You have a bathroom that's all gender bathrooms,
Starting point is 01:12:26 single stalls with bathrooms, if it's a lot of bathrooms, it'd be single-stores, and then there'll be a communal sink. Right. So they found a way to accommodate people that they would have never thought, do you know what I mean? Because before we were like, oh, these are men bathrooms. And they just changed that.
Starting point is 01:12:44 And so now every place has all gender bathrooms, and it's solved. Do you know what I mean? Like, I'm not saying what the solution is, but there could be a solution. There could be... Well, giving the solution to a man, Well, it's the same way.
Starting point is 01:13:00 If you have people competing in boxing, how many different weight classes you have in boxing? It's like 10? Danny, I just sent you a clip. Bring that up. Fly, but here's the thing, though. This woman over here is never going to beat that trans woman. No, but it might be. But she worked her ass off.
Starting point is 01:13:21 She would have been the woman's, the world's strongest woman. She would have won first place. Yeah. If it wasn't for that trans woman, that's what she's, it's like, and she's mad because she put in all the effort, all the work to get to where she's at. And it's like, fuck, I think it's fucked up. I'm just saying this is the early portion of it. Right.
Starting point is 01:13:44 The pendulum swings and then it finds the sense. But why don't they, look it, I would watch transports only. I bet you would. All. With no pants. I would love to see a wing-wang flip out in a fucking, football game. I would look that I really would. I would watch a trans sports
Starting point is 01:14:01 if that might be that might be something later. Why don't they do it now and let the trans women have their community? How long did it take for us to figure out the bathroom? Two thousand years. So are you going to figure out sports?
Starting point is 01:14:16 Sports don't need to be figuring out. What do you mean? I don't think men who think they who transitioned to new women.
Starting point is 01:14:32 Here's what I would say. Men fight other men in boxing. And when you had one guy that's 200-pound, another guy, 160 pounds, you created categories. That was a way of us solving the fact that there's different muscle mass, different size. All right. How about this, though?
Starting point is 01:14:54 Nobody's going to say anything to our, lower guy, I'm fighting a big guy, and that's what it is. That's not true. You never, and professionally. They have weight classes. They have weight classes. No, I'm talking about on street. No, that's not the same thing.
Starting point is 01:15:08 Are you fighting trans people on the street? No, no, no. I would love to see you get your ass with by a trans. That chick right there, I want them to wrestle teeth. No, what, you know, I'm saying, sometimes it's like, It's spelled out We don't need to go on no further We said there's never that situation
Starting point is 01:15:32 But the trans bathroom thing is not solved Sure it is now Look at this right here Play this clip Now, hey stop, before you play it I just think that if you're going to transition I want you to try That's all I'm saying
Starting point is 01:15:47 You don't want a beard and a I just want you to get the voice I want you to try the voice And I want you to try your best I want you to watch this clip and tell me about if the bathroom thing is, if your daughter was in the bathroom here, play this.
Starting point is 01:16:05 They're confronted her for using the women's bathroom at a public library and an internal investigation has now been launched. So here's what Sasha Swinson says happened. He says, it looked like Andrejohn. Listen, you're not a word. That's obvious.
Starting point is 01:16:22 It's like, dude, just Fake the voice. You're on the news. Just be like, I said, I was like, I'm on doing the giant. This guy.
Starting point is 01:16:31 This guy just talked like he talked when he was a mechanic. Like, you know what I'm saying? Do you know that there's, you know what I'm saying? It's like, dude, he's not, you should be trying a little bit more. I think they're putting those out there.
Starting point is 01:16:48 Oh. Yeah, it's trying to. So you can. They're trying to get distracted from them fucking them kids. That's what they're doing. I just learned about that, too. Jesus. You just learned about this?
Starting point is 01:17:01 Well, dude, I just watched this dude on Sean Ryan's show. The Hacker Kid, that nerdy dude? Oh, yeah. About 7-6-4 or something? How this is he, like, a cult out there, and all they try to do. I'm talking about Epstein and the motherfuckers we know. They didn't fuck kids. Yeah, they did.
Starting point is 01:17:22 Really? 14, 13, 12. Let me ask you a question about this. I don't like how that's... Let me take devil's advocate on this. Say that. It's fucked up that they... It's going down and...
Starting point is 01:17:39 But they're doing stuff on the internet now where they're getting kids and they're signing on as girls or boys. And they're trapping dudes. They're trapping dudes. And they're getting them to send photos. And body slams. ramming them in the Walmart.
Starting point is 01:17:57 Oh, you never seen this. What? There's regular creators. Their whole content is trapping... Oh, no, the pedophiles. Yeah, and then they smack them in the Walmart. I just got arrested for that, though. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:18:08 One of the guys just went to jail because he would go and beat the fuck out of these people, and he's going to jail now. But he's happy. Yeah. He's like, I'm good with it. And he'll probably be the best in prison. Okay, pedophiles scary as shit.
Starting point is 01:18:24 The other thing where they're just snatching kids and selling them to fucking things is scary to me. But they're selling them for pedophilia, you know. Oh, man, it's fucking frightening. Yeah, that's what the, but they, talk, the history of this country is that. Right. They would, what do you think they were doing with? What do you mean the history? I thought the history of this country.
Starting point is 01:18:44 It's Thanksgiving tomorrow. Can you please not ruin Thanksgiving? Well, you asked me. Now I'm just going to be eating turkey. Do you want to know or no? Tell about the Israel. History. Ah, here we go.
Starting point is 01:18:54 the history of things you ever. But yeah, they raped the fucking Indian kids and snatched them and cut their hair. But they were doing that with the children of slaves. They were buying slaves and fucking them. And eating them. They were cooking them and eating them. You white motherfucking. This is turning into a thing that I...
Starting point is 01:19:15 You know, you're not... There's this book called Edible, Edible, Delectable Negro. Is there a video? watch it probably is but you know many do you know how many porns will come up if I Google delectable they'll be like gay
Starting point is 01:19:32 you know we're just be Dante dancing in the middle of doctors get it get it get it what is it called delectable black people
Starting point is 01:19:45 delectable negroes really what is it about it's about cannibalism slave owner cannibalism during the antebellum era Who is he?
Starting point is 01:19:55 As, what a delectable, Negro? What is that? What is that about? I mean, I've seen very pretty girls in my life. So they would, why would they, who would eat them? What, what, because you saw these people. Hang on one second, you didn't read the book. You don't know what he's talking about.
Starting point is 01:20:10 He don't read. Do you read? Sometimes. They would, they would, because they own people. Slave owners would eat them. Eat them something. Yes. barbecue, like, slow-
Starting point is 01:20:25 Is that where barbecue came from? No, I don't know about that, but I know that way you guys are so good at it? Well, we would be good on the inside. Just to add it, it's a question. I'm being curious. I'm not being racist. I'm just asking questions. Wait a minute, his problem is he got fox on.
Starting point is 01:20:39 That's what it is. Take Fox off. No, I don't watch news. I don't watch news. Bob's a don't. I don't watch news. Don't my dead toenow. I agree with that
Starting point is 01:20:55 I can't watch news I flip-flop too much I watch CNN I'd be like God damn it And then I watch Fox I'm like these motherfuckers Now you gotta watch
Starting point is 01:21:07 Watch everything No I think it's all I think at this point right now Even the internet It's all It's just to fucking confuse us Because I think we're
Starting point is 01:21:20 you know, you've got to, I think you have to, your circle, your world has to be very small. And your world is your world. My world is Don and Max. That's it. That's all I care about. And all the other shit is bullshit. It's not, I, whatever I do, whatever I think, whatever I say is not going to have effect or have any change. What will change is how I raise my son and how I put him out in the world.
Starting point is 01:21:46 That's not true. That's not true. How do you think people found out about? about global warming. It's bullshit. I'm telling you, Bob, and that was my dad's tone. Cigarettes are fucking fine.
Starting point is 01:22:00 It doesn't cause cancer. And there's no cancer. And there's an alien craft. Lizard people and mermaids. You're going for the trifecta? No moon landing, flat earth. I talked to Kurt Metsker for eight hours in a pool one night. And there were Jew lasers.
Starting point is 01:22:15 Why? I was stuck. He doesn't blink. You had a cramp. He was just staring at me. Do you hear about the Jewelazers? I was like, yeah. Oh, that's modern telegrams and that.
Starting point is 01:22:27 Oh, crazy. I mean, there's so many things, though. We didn't go to the moon. But it is. It's so easy to discern between the fake shit and the... You just got to do a little bit of research. I don't have... I get it.
Starting point is 01:22:40 That's the problem. I do have time. I do have time. I don't have time. I have 75 podcasts. But don't you want to know. this stuff to talk about it? You don't go to shit.
Starting point is 01:22:52 No, because I, when I... You'd rather talk about peanut brittle. I'll tell you why. I'd rather goof around, have fun and learn about it from somebody. I'll listen to people. I listen to people. I like, I'll watch debates. They're your research.
Starting point is 01:23:05 You don't watch debates. I do watch debates. We're not talking about boss and... Joe de Rosa? Well, then your debates are different than mine. Smart people. But I don't... Here's the thing I think.
Starting point is 01:23:20 think in life. You need to find out what you're smart at and focus on that. I don't agree with that. I do. I think if you figure out how you're smart, you could be smart at everything. I could, but I would rather be smart at what I like to do and what I like to be smart at. You know what you tell him is lazy. Yeah. No, I look. Let me tell us you're lazy. On stage, there are subtleties on stage that you have a, you understand. I don't know if you would actually be able to articulate it, like, why certain things work and why. But if you saw a young comic and they were doing a, you could go, eh, change, don't put that, you don't need that.
Starting point is 01:24:00 Yeah. That same wisdom that you have from that, if you boil it down to what I call the root, to the basics of it, you can use that wisdom in everything that you do. I understand that, but I don't, I don't want. He's lazy. Yeah, that's lazy. I don't want to. I get it.
Starting point is 01:24:18 I mean, I'm not. I want to stay in the matrix. I don't want to research. I don't want to be on the never-connection like YouTube. I want to know as much true shit as I can possibly. But how do you know it's true? You do the research. Okay.
Starting point is 01:24:32 Remember when your teacher said, show me to work? When you do a math problem? No. No. Okay. Sorry. I told you. Bob is dumb.
Starting point is 01:24:40 Danny. You remember when they would tell you asked you to do the work? You do a word problem. You can't remember to speak it to the microphone. Danny, you know what I'm talking about? Yeah, I remember the teacher would say, show me to work. Yeah. Like, sometimes you could get the answer, but you wouldn't have the stages.
Starting point is 01:24:57 Yeah, that always bugged to me. The reason why they tell you show you to work is so you understand the concepts. So you just got to go through, it's what you call it. But I don't, I would rather fucking go. Be lazy. It's lazy. I'd rather go for a walk with my wife or take my kid out and go get an ice cream or shoot the shit with him. I'd rather do other things.
Starting point is 01:25:17 I'd rather go hiking. I'd rather go camping I'd rather go fly fishing I know how to tie a blood knot I know how what fly to use on a certain river I know how to what fly rod to use
Starting point is 01:25:28 I know how to start a fire I know how to stay out all night I know to be in the woods I like that shit I'm smart in things that you don't know if I took you fly fishing you'd be like
Starting point is 01:25:39 I don't I've never been you'd be right I could I could learn I you know I was a fencer you're a gay fencer I was a fencer. I had two years of college.
Starting point is 01:25:51 You mean with the thing? Or you put up fences? I won a bronze medal in the junior Olympics. Let's hear of a picture. Yeah, you don't have a picture of you fencing. You mean putting up like fences? No, I had fenced. With the sword?
Starting point is 01:26:06 I competed, yeah. You competed in fencing? Yeah. Dante is coming out for. Dante was a gay musketeer. Don Tannian. Dante done the gay shit I've ever heard
Starting point is 01:26:21 Not be gay He lived with gay uncles He had gay outfits I wasn't worried about I wasn't worried about What nobody's caught This cockat was a He was a sword fighter
Starting point is 01:26:30 He was You kill my father A petto die I just I But there's so much I get it But I just
Starting point is 01:26:41 I if I'm interested In something I go deep dive I'm all in Right But I would love To fly fishing is something I would love to learn. I'll take you fly fishing.
Starting point is 01:26:50 I'll take you this summer. It's not easy. Right up by my house. It's not easy. You have to have a lot of patience and it's all about knowing what, but when I find interest in, like I was telling you before, my wife said, I need a bookshelf for Max. We went, it was like $1,100 for the bookshelf. It was like, it's so expensive. I was like, I'll just make it. And I went on the internet. I learned what type of wood. I learned how to make it. I bought a saw I did all the stuff I made
Starting point is 01:27:19 he still has it today he has his bookshelf in his room I built from scratch the one I was going to buy was 1100 bucks The one I built been broke already No it's solid and the other one would have been bought one Exactly the I bought Particle board and the one I bought
Starting point is 01:27:35 We were going to buy was 1100 bucks the one I built Was $13,000 So After you put the store It's so expensive Yeah it was but no I I can enjoy doing it. What I like, I invest in it.
Starting point is 01:27:52 And I feel like if you, like all this stuff about trans and gay and black and white and all this stuff, it's so intricate. There's so many nuances to it. Everybody has so many different sides in the pen. It's not black or white. It's so many different sides to it. It's only sides you don't know. I know trans people that are so mad at trans people for what they're doing. And I know gay people that are like mad at the trans community
Starting point is 01:28:20 You don't find that interesting to have those conversations I just don't know and it's like I I have trans friends that I love I I don't give a fuck about trans people My son has been to a drag show I don't care I I live my life and I don't my My son it's important to me that it doesn't go up A racist against anybody You know
Starting point is 01:28:43 That he accepts people who they are not what they do or what hole they put shit in that he you know if good people are good people and if you're a good person you're a good person if you're a crazy fucking person stay away from them and there's crazy white people
Starting point is 01:28:57 that's crazy black people there's crazy whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa crazy motherfucking black people I'm sitting with one of them right now well you say you don't care of people do no well yeah you can care about them big trans ones
Starting point is 01:29:13 I just want him to try so that he doesn't So when they enter them to go, when they go, why were you in the girls' bath? And he's not like, listen, I had to go pick up my truck. I had to build a bookcase. Women should participate in female sports. I do not. I think they should have, but I also think we should do our best to get them their own league to their should be.
Starting point is 01:29:42 I don't think it's enough of them to do it. Well, I think there's enough of them doing it that maybe that, maybe that, there will be they don't have a place they don't have a place to go so if if you had there's a women sports there's men's sports women had no place to play and they just buy the wmba and they create it because of but look how long it took for us to get but we accustomed to that it's AI it's fucking the world it's the internet we can come up with a trans league in five seconds and let them compete and we now trans kids can have a goal to play football play uh do something sports, whatever they want to do. Yeah, but it's got to be able to make money.
Starting point is 01:30:20 Nobody's, it's got to be able to make money. They have trans groups in Mike Scun's High School now. Okay. Yeah, but how many is in there? I don't know. Five? Three? I don't know, but three is more than none and them hiding. Yeah, but you look. And next year, there might be five. And look, people are into the WNBA now, but look how long. Because of a white chick. What up?
Starting point is 01:30:43 But, but how long before that? Years of years where people, and it still doesn't make a profit. Well, it's starting to. No, it doesn't make, it still doesn't make a profit. When they started that fucking Caitlin, they started that. Because they started making people hate each other. Yeah. And they started controversy watching and people were talking.
Starting point is 01:31:02 People was bitching about that and riding for Caitlin. And if you asked them, name two teams, they wouldn't even be able to tell you two teams that they played. Why does it start? What? It's a start It's a start Yeah No matter what you're saying
Starting point is 01:31:20 Well little girls are growing up I remember when W.A You had some chick With straight stud with cornrows And she had a handle And then you had chicks That couldn't even bounce the ball Right but now it's actually a good game
Starting point is 01:31:33 Yeah So it does take time But you have to invent it And make it In order to grow They have to load a court I mean The same woman
Starting point is 01:31:43 Dunk the ball man And they don't dunk I'm not interested Why do they Why do they not lower If you lower it then it's not the same Lower to a little bit A little bit
Starting point is 01:31:54 So like where you could dunk it Yeah no What I'm saying You don't put it A garbage can You have a step ladder Why are you Come man
Starting point is 01:32:03 You have a fuck bad No I'm saying Lower a little bit Yeah And they gave them And they give them a smaller ball Already They do they have a smaller ball
Starting point is 01:32:10 Let them WMBH Yeah I agree It comes more I would watch women's sports. I have no problem with it. I don't give a shit.
Starting point is 01:32:20 I love watching volleyball. I mean, you pervert. That's the problem is guys, we talk like this, but we're still just massagistic pieces of shit on a s. You like the female form. I do. So? I do.
Starting point is 01:32:31 I can't. You wouldn't watch trans sports if there was a trans basketball league? Trans. Just whatever. I don't even watch regular basketball. So, I would watch it. I don't give a shit. You're gay.
Starting point is 01:32:45 that's not the point to understand what a piece of shit I don't know I don't know I don't know there's so many like we did Skank Fest this year there's trans people all over the place now
Starting point is 01:32:59 where before they would be terrified to go to a place like that now they're welcome with open arms how many did you see because of Joe de Rosa that's right yeah we need we need gay guys like Joe de Rosa
Starting point is 01:33:12 to start but that but even how many did you see three take how many people was at skank fest thousands thousands okay but it's okay to go you get two one right but i'm saying you have joe listen you got jodoroso blow one trans person at skank fest and more will come wide open if you build if you suck it it will they will come think of how many people there's guys that we know that are into trans guys out in the open in the common in the comment There's a lot out open now. Right, which is great.
Starting point is 01:33:46 It's fine, whatever, but I'm just saying it ain't that many. Not that many. Like, okay, there's more than there was. You had the three that was at Skangfest. Now you're going to say, you've got to pay basketball. What if they don't want to play basketball? Then you can't have a league. So if it's such a small percentage and one of them plays basketball.
Starting point is 01:34:07 But they've got to create it and for them to have it. Fair enough. on these things. What do you mean? One trans on each woman team? Yeah. See? Now you're thinking of,
Starting point is 01:34:19 you're thinking out the box. Everybody gets a trans. To make it fair? Yeah. And you just got to stick that trance. Got to D-Up. It's so funny that we have such a, like Europe doesn't give a fuck about tities and dick.
Starting point is 01:34:39 They don't care about tithies and dicks. We have such a Puritan. thing about titties and dicks and what you fuck. It's a religion. It's the, it's the, it's the Christian dumb shit. Right, dumb shit. Yeah, who cares? I don't care. I don't
Starting point is 01:34:55 care that you were fucking gay Jetson. You got to say that you can't. I don't care what you don't want to, look at this and you go I don't, I don't think it's up unfair that this black women bust that ass to do since she got beat out from it. It's just but it's a sense of fair. What'd you say?
Starting point is 01:35:11 Hey, he's black. uh Robert Kelly hates black there's only one black person I hate oh you
Starting point is 01:35:20 and it's not see that coming it's like when you asked you know what I hate about white people you were like what he's like
Starting point is 01:35:30 all that up that was the same joke but it's so funny that we're don't you think that we're and I'm gonna ask Dante
Starting point is 01:35:39 because you're smarter than Keith is that where the America is changing every day and it's slowly getting better and better and we're not that old either this country's not that old was it how old 400?
Starting point is 01:35:54 400 years? 400 years? Yeah. What? We're getting worse. You think we're getting... No. We're not going back.
Starting point is 01:36:01 We're not going back. Well, racially we're going back. But it's not going to turn around. Yeah, we're not going back. We always go back and go forward. We're not, how are we going to? back. Well, as soon as they say, make America great again,
Starting point is 01:36:16 that's informed me. Oh, this guy with the fucking... You're crazy. They're trying to go back. Definitely trying to go back. Are you talking to the microphone? Now, bring it back... Will you make this podcast great again?
Starting point is 01:36:32 It can't be resurrected. It's all right. I'm going to make that hat, a red hat that says, make this podcast great again. But soon as they make America great again And inform you That we're looking for something that was great Back in the day
Starting point is 01:36:51 Yeah And it wasn't And it wasn't good for us But not everything They're not saying let's go back to slavery Yeah they are Yeah they are Yeah they are
Starting point is 01:37:00 Look at us Because look at the I mean you Black culture has Nobody wants slaves They got slaves I can't wait until everybody has And you're going to get your own slave robot to jerk you off in your apartment.
Starting point is 01:37:13 And they're going to turn against us. And then we're going to have to go back to the future. Now we have to really go out, make America a great again. You know, so they make all robots like a gray? I would go back to peace before stroke. I'm like, come with me if you want to live. This is going to be a racist tech company that makes all their robots black. You know, they did that with a fucking, you couldn't read black people under the census in the airport.
Starting point is 01:37:39 What? You know how you get the water? Yeah. Well, the samples that they used for the hand, the water wouldn't work with black skin. Really? Yeah. They had to fix. They had to change the AI on it.
Starting point is 01:37:51 Really? Yeah, because it was a bunch of white guys that used white guy hands. They drink water. And they were white. And they would, so when you were black, you couldn't get the. You couldn't get water? Danny, I know this is, this was in the paper about this. They had to change it.
Starting point is 01:38:05 You couldn't get the soap or the water, any of the hand thing. Would open that for you? he can't get water now they made the cap too tight give me give you to Dante stupid you're out of your mind you're out of your motherfucking mind
Starting point is 01:38:20 but you now let me ask do you think that's racist or just a mistake on their part it's it is racist but not in a malicious way right so there's racism not maliciously listen there's I know white stuff you don't know no black stuff I know black stuff
Starting point is 01:38:36 no test me uh name uh name the Three fat boys. Fat one, fat two, fat three. I'll tell you right now, dead. All of them, yeah, the last one just died. Diabetes one, diabetes two, and diabetes three. And I think I only remember two of them.
Starting point is 01:38:57 You would test him on something you didn't know? Mark E. Mark E. F. Buffy. And I don't remember the other one. Cello. You made. His name's Jello. It was cello.
Starting point is 01:39:08 All right, we've got to wrap this up before I get fucking the time. attacked by you too um no listen are you smoking weed no no shut up keef yeah you're a rat you can't fucking why you're a rat i'm not no rat you can't peer pressure me fucking i has a way 50 you piece of shit yeah 50 yeah he's not he's not he's 60 something i know yeah he's still trying to peer pressure you yeah you still he's trying to he's trying to pimp people
Starting point is 01:39:40 still he's still you got any peanut nobody wants you peanut brittles I bet he has peanut pruddle in his pocket he still travels with it he always
Starting point is 01:39:50 he always carries a little piece of peanut brittal you can't smoke the weed right and shut up you don't even smoke bitch all right listen Dante where are you going to be
Starting point is 01:40:02 I'm being in London a top secret all next week oh that's cool I've never been to London yeah and I'm doing a backyard comment Comedy, Top Secret, and Angel Comedy Club. What's Top Secret? Top Secret is, they're actually getting ready to open one in New York.
Starting point is 01:40:19 Really? Yeah. What is it? It's Top Secret Comedy Club. He has the guy owns two comedy clubs. One in London? He owns two in London, and he's opening one here. Is it a black room or is it a room?
Starting point is 01:40:30 No. I want to play London. But they do the, they do it. You know, they do like an intermission. I love that. So they go to, they do a host, two comics, and intermission. But no way. Like you go to the bar, you get your drink, and you take your drink back.
Starting point is 01:40:43 And they do a host, two comics, and two comics, and they do one more. Sometimes they'll do two intermissions. Really? It's a long show. Yeah, but you can leave and that people come in. Okay. I can't fucking printing money. I want to do that, man. What about you?
Starting point is 01:40:56 Where are you going to be besides the cellar? I'm at the cellar. You had the cellar a lot. I've been on tour with Juana. All right, where's Wanda going to be? No. I mean, I'm going to be at a mother ship. the second through the fourth of january are you doing the headline spot of course what the fuck else i don't know
Starting point is 01:41:16 dude i'm just asking you disrespect me one more time man disrespect me one more motherfucking time i don't mean to watch what happened i don't mean to disrespect you i'm just asking questions what's my name k dog k dog k delish no i'm second through the four and then we're back on tour again all over and dates oh that's good one all right cool uh i'm gonna be all over the place two point pleasant beach in december january sarah soda florida and mccurities uh on this i can't read it because he's going past it too much can you go down and let me read the date please uh the 16th through in the 17th and then bekipsy the 23rd and the 24th and then of course uh i'm going to be in
Starting point is 01:42:05 i'm all over the place greenwood village i don't know oh i'm going to be at the uh Denver comedy works which i love in february i got dates all through the years all you're going to do is go to punchup dot live slash robert kelly do you have punch up yet you gotta get a punch up dude you have punch up no is that punch up is a new it's a new app it's a new website that you go on and you send people and they you you collect their they just put in an email and then you can they'll know where you're going to be you can put whatever video up like patreon up there you can charge money for a video if you want to uh they take a lower percentage than patreon you can a special up there. Oh, is it like Patreon? It's like
Starting point is 01:42:42 Patreon, but it's also, you get the emails. So they actually have a whole app where you can go and be like oh, where am I playing? I got 300 people on my email list from there and you can send an email just to them for that date. And it's the best new thing
Starting point is 01:42:58 for comedians out there. You should definitely get one. And then, of course, guys, what are you going to be? Follow me on Instagram at Danny Braff and come see me at Comedy at Verve in Somervu, New Jersey, the third Thursday every month. This is Joe Russell. out the cheese show on YouTube, just type in cheese show. It's the first goddamn thing that
Starting point is 01:43:14 comes up. Danny. I want to do that professionally like him. Okay, go ahead. As being in. Where are you going to be, Keith? Well, I'll tell you what. Hey. Well, I want to plug my podcast to. What's your podcast? Man School 202, and I do consultations at
Starting point is 01:43:32 Dante Niro.com, click on consult. How much is a consultation? Depends. How long? An hour? If you do an hour, it's like $350. 350? No, no. How do you give your friend the discount? Yeah, can we get a discount code? I would do it for you free. All right, but can you get discount from my listeners?
Starting point is 01:43:48 Uh, yeah, I'll tell you what I'll do. If they do an hour, if they do a half hour, I'll give them an hour. This way I don't have to change the... Okay. So the half hour is $2.25. $2.25, so you'll give them an hour. Each amount they pick up girls... Look at that right now.
Starting point is 01:44:08 Where do they go to do that? Pinheiro.com, click on consult. Check that out, man. How about my stroke people that I know? What do you want them to do? I want a couple of free ones. I'm going to tell them. Anybody with a stroke is it free.
Starting point is 01:44:24 I'm going to tell them. Here's your advice. Don't talk to Keith. Come on, man. Give a brother with a stroke. Free confidence. They got enough problems. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:44:38 Well, I mean, they need confidence. It's stroke people call me. I'll do the same thing. How about that? All my stroke guys out there. You get a half hour. You get an hour for a half hour. 45 minutes free.
Starting point is 01:44:54 Anything after that, you pay a little bit. $5. All right. We're going to go to patreon.com, answer all your questions. If you want to be part of this live, watch it live, and you want to see, get the extra episode, and you want to ask questions to the people on my show. Go to patreon.com.
Starting point is 01:45:10 Robert Kelly. It supports the show and helps us keep doing this. It's not a lot of money and I don't make any money off of it. It's to keep it going. So appreciate you guys. We'll see you next time on. You know what, dude?

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