Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - YKWD #645 | Janet McNamara & Greg Giraldo Jr.

Episode Date: June 28, 2026

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You know what dude live. Welcome everybody to the show. I started a social media podcast. The fact. The YKWD podcast. YKWD is back again. Old school, back in the day, where it all started before them all. This podcast is so fun and crazy.

What's up, everybody? We're back. You know what, dude podcast. One of the original podcasts on the East Coast. We're still doing it every week. I have comedians, old ones, new ones. And that's how the show goes. It's a comic hang.

So if you're here for the first time, welcome. If you're watching on YouTube, but listen and make sure you hit the like, make sure you subscribe because it helps the show. Don't just listen to it and then not subscribe, you weirdo. And if you really want to support the show and get an extra episode every week or ask questions to the fan, go to patreon.com slash Robert Kelly. And you can join up right there. And it's pretty cool. Joe, who do we got? Today we have Greg Gerardo Jr.

A lot of people just got excited. And we have Janet McNamara. I'm sorry, I stepped up. I thought you were not knowing how to say it. No, I do it with, I just do it with pizzazz. I do it again. Do it little, I never hear pizzazz out of you. Greg Geraldo Jr.

And Janet McNamara. Nope, you fucked it up. It sounded right to me. Macnamara. Not Mac Mamara. Damn. Yep. I know you fucked it up.

I know you didn't know. You have no pizzazz ever. Yeah, welcome. What's up? First of all, first time you're on my show. First time you, this is two firsts on my show. I've been following you. I found you on Instagram.

Number one, you're from Massachusetts. Yep. Which I fucking could tell right away. Just your fucking energy. I didn't even hear, I was usually from Boston. I've met this fucking girl my whole life. Every fucking barbecue my family has a fucking McNamara or Affinity or a Donlin or something. As soon as I heard her.

And then fell in love with your stuff. And of course you, I've known who you are for a long time, which is funny because I knew your dad. Yeah. I mean, we used to hang out of the cellar every fucking night almost. for years, and then I found out you were doing stand-up, and I was like, what? And I was like, holy shit.

I was getting nervous. His father was Greg D'Raldo. I caught that. Yeah. Yeah, everyone always gets so scared when they see me for the first time. Everyone thinks I'm going to be bad. Well, dude, because Richard Pryor's son

ruined it for all you guys. I know, you really did. He went on the Apollo and fucking just ate his ass. We're all like, fucking, yeah, and then boo. They fucking, the whole crowd booed him off. We were like, God damn it. He's such a nice guy, too. It's such a shame.

He is a nice guy, but it's funny. It wasn't that night. No, no, he was not. What a weird place to make your debut. Yeah. On the Apollo. Because he also did it, I think he was six months in a comedy. And, like, six months in a comedy, I'm bombing anywhere.

You know what I mean? So, like, throw me up with the Apollo. It's a disaster. Well, because I had to, I got to, I got to, I had to go host a couple. And I've always seen them around, blah, blah, blah, blah. But I needed a host a couple weeks ago. And I hit you up.

I was like, do you want to come host? He's like, fuck yeah. And I was nervous. I was like, please. Please don't ruin your father for me. But you fucking, you were great, dude. Thanks, man. Your own thing.

I think so. I tried to be my dad when I first started comedy. Really? Everyone, everyone hated it. Because I went up there and I, like, you know, your first couple of months, you're trying to find out who you are. Yeah. And I remember, like, I went up there and I tried to be my dad.

That didn't work. I went up there and I tried to be like the I get no girls guy. So I got on stage and was like, I get absolutely no pussy. And I was like, dude, you clearly don't get no pussy. And then I was like, no, okay. And then I went up the next day and was like, I get all the pussy. And they're like, that's way worse. Don't ever do that.

We hate that. You all? I get all the pussy guy? I was for two days. Nobody likes I get all the pussy guy. No one did. No one did. No one liked I get no pussy guy either.

I would like him more than I get all the people. Yeah, yeah, that's what I was thinking, but overcorrected. So when you said you were being your dad, I don't understand what you're doing like. Because your dad was probably the best at rants. Yes. His rants were, I mean, one of the funniest guys ever. And it's weird because I knew your father. I was there.

But we never really, we would hang out at the table downstairs. We never really went down and watched each other. You've got to say it's Colin. It's Norton. It's Patrice. your dad, me, burr. You know what I mean? It's like these murder a row.

That was the comedy seller. It was one show, nine to fucking two, every night. And the weekends, they had two shows. They had one show on the weekends. And then they switched it up as it started getting popular. The seller was dead a lot of the times. But then, you know, we would just sit at the table,

fuck with each other. And then you'd go down and do your spot and come back up and fuck with each other. and that was it but I actually started to listen to your dad later and I was like

oh fuck man I wish I watched him more when he was right fucking there yeah he's my favorite comic ever and I'm obviously very biased when I say that

but he was unbelievable he was highly intelligent guy but also uh fucking hilariously funny you know

when you get the two smart and funny, Louis, same thing. Highly intelligent. I mean, Billy Burr's highly intelligent. They're probably, you know, when a fucking comic says, yeah, I fly helicopters, I'm like, what?

Your dad was a lawyer. He was. He was really bad lawyer, though. I don't know if you know these stories. No, what do you mean he's a bad lawyer? He like, because he went to Harvard, so everyone thought he was going to be this brilliant guy, but he was also just like a, like a,

I don't want to say a fuck-up, but he liked to go out and party and drink and have a good time. I mean, he was fun. Yeah, he was fun. We called that fun in the 80s. The 70s day that was like a really cool guy. I don't know if my grandmother called it fun. Wow.

Yeah, she's not supposed to. She's not supposed to. But she had her fun, too. She did. So he was a fuck up. He was parted and shit? He parted like crazy. And he actually, because he worked at a Scatnin'Anon Arps, he got fired in like three, four months.

And then he worked pro bono and got fired from that, too. You got fired from free? He got fired from free, which is crazy to have a Harvard degree and get fired for. fired from free. There was one time he told me this story where he would like, showed up to court one day. He showed up to the courtroom. And he opened up his briefcase and it was just all blank sheets of paper

in there. That's fucked up, man. Now, your dad was kind of cool as shit, though, because I remember he used to have the leather on. Yeah. And I worked with him at JFL. We did the nasty show together. And I remember he would just go out and

fucking murder. Murder. Like murder. Like, like even down at the cellar it was like never a bad show and then he started doing the roast and that's where people were like, holy shit viciously mean guy in a hilarious way. Yeah man

he's he's it's crazy to hear that you're right he wasn't absolutely sure it's it's funny you say that he was cool because he was but that came later and that's such an interesting especially for me when we talk about finding your voice in comedy like he was I don't want to say a loser but he was a

Harvard lawyer so there's clips of him like nine months in a comedy and he had like his like shitty white uniron shirt like tucked in his like horrible khakis and overalls and I don't know if you did you know my mom ever I know of course I know you might you knew my mom my mom was a waitress at carolines but she also was like a fashion designer and did some modeling and did all that um your mom's smoking hot well I mean your words not mine I'm just gonna say it's gonna come out and say it well yeah because they used to bring you guys down but your mom was like really beautiful woman that's what that's that better no no it's felt more respectable for sure

Absolutely. I really just shot that out of a piece of shit I am. Your mom was smoking. To be honest with you, I've always wanted to hear that in a Boston accent. Thanks, Bobby. Yeah, no, that's what everyone says. It's so funny. My mom has stories of like every, because all the, like you guys are, of course, I look up to your generation so much. And my mom is like, oh, yeah, I shut that guy down back in the day.

Oh, really? Yeah, it's like all of you. Not me. Not me. Not me. Not me. Never did that. I never did that.

Thank God. That would be weird. this would be a very uncomfortable podcast yeah yeah my mom told me a couple things about you yeah she has a couple nicknames for you i pull up his dick pick irish guy um yeah dude it was uh it was really i think uh the generation of all of i remember one night me me and dad and norton and patrice was sitting at the table and the original owner manny we're all just sitting around and we all just you know they took We talked politics.

We made each other laugh. We told, I mean, one night we had molestation stories. Perfect. We would just all just, fuck it. We would just talk about everything at that table. And it was just us. It wasn't like, you know, it was just one show. It wasn't five clubs.

It wasn't fucking the world of comedy that it is now. It was us. And one night, Patrice, you know Patrice. Yeah. And he was, nobody was talking to him. I think your father was talking to Ava and Esty. I was talking to Norton and, and, uh, and Maine. And Pishu's just sitting there, and I think he just got uncomfortable with the silence.

And he just looked at Manny, who was an older guy, and Nome's father. He's like, yo, man, man, you're teeth real. They made a wood. Buddy, we were all like, what did you just say? Like, what? Mani went, you motherfucker. You insult me in front of my fucking friends. Fuck you, you piece of shit.

And people's like, no, no, no. I was just... Me and dad was just like, ah, man. What the fuck? We have such a good night. And he kicked Patrice out. He's like, get the fuck out of it. Oh, my God.

And I remember Norton tried to defend Patrice. He's like, fuck you too. And they got to a fight. It was just me and Geraldo. Me and your dad just left to do shows. So we had to like go back on it. Oh, my God. It was fucking crazy, man.

That was so funny, man. I was laughing. Why would you, dummy, just say that to a guy? Just insult an old guy. What is he? George Washington? And you, you know, it's weird because I saw you doing comedy, but you're so fucking different.

It's so, your comedy, it hit me, it hit me sideways. Anybody, because you're 100% you. Yeah. And you talk about how you are. You have this joke about being diagnosed, trying to get diagnosed with autism. Yep. But you didn't meet. I didn't meet their criteria.

You didn't meet the criteria. Yeah. Well, how of... I don't know. It's complicated. It's like, I've said it a bunch of times, but it's like you kind of, I didn't realize until very recently you have to study for the test. What?

Yeah. What do you mean you have to study? You have to, like, you have to come prepared with reasons why you think you're autistic and, like, understand, and you can't say things that, like, would bring you out of, like... Can you just walk in with a train and they'd be like, doing? Yeah. I think it's like, they ask you like, do you have special interests? And it's like, no.

But then they get me to start talking about Excel, then I'll go off. That's autistic. It's very autistic. Yeah. If Excel is your thing, wouldn't that be autistic? Yeah, but it's weird to just say, do you have any special interests? It's like, I don't have any special interest. It's not special to just be really into Excel.

For what it is worth, I clocked you the second you walked in. Excel is not I've never in my life heard anybody say Excel is my speciality Yeah that's very autistic Yeah dude what Is Excel even around still?

It is It's a dying breed Unfortunately They're replacing Excel With like dashboards and sequel Which is part of why I'm doing comedy full time now Because of Excel's dying

Yeah my skill set Oh my God What was it what do you do I mean I know Excel is just like spreadsheets or something It's like spreadsheets and templates and you basically, you can automate a lot of things with Excel. But SQL is, it is, SQL is better.

It's better. Yeah, I just don't know SQL as well. But couldn't you learn it? I could, but I'm 43. That's done? It's like, it's one of those things that it took me 20 years to get it really good at Excel. And yeah, I could work really hard and get really good at SQL. But I'll be, if I work my ass off, I'll be as good at SQL as I was at Excel when I was 28.

Right. So it's like, at some point, you kind of have to. Become a stand-up. Yeah, and SQL, you don't really need to know SQL because this chat, GBT. You just have to understand the... This whole conversation is autistic. Am I the only one? She suck me in.

Yeah, yeah, I can tell. I'll suck you in. I'll talk about Excel for the rest of this. Let's do a whole podcast about Excel. Done. I would love to get on it. You're an accountant or something, right? Yeah, I was a controller.

A what? It's called a controller. like middle management. So, but you grew up, did you grow up in Boston? I grew up in Randolph. Randolph. So South of Boston? Yeah. I was in, I was in Juvenile Hall and Randolph. Oh, yeah. Yeah, they had a juvenile hall in Randolph. Oh, nice. Yeah, it was

kind of a shitty one. Yeah, Blue Hills. I think so. I don't know exactly where it is, because it's been so many years. Yeah. Yeah, they had, uh, they had, all the juvenile halls are like in weird, weird places like Randolph, uh, Bill Rica, Halifax. They just had these little things that they would put us in and just put you in jail in some weird. Randolph town that they know even if you ran away you'd be stuck Yeah there's no yeah there's no

There's like one There's two buses in Randolph But it goes like it takes like 45 minutes to get to Quincy And Quincy's the next town over Yeah it's fucking nuts too Yeah But then you you have family Big Irish Catholic family

Big Irish Catholic family Yeah my dad was one of seven Yeah that back in the day they just had kids Yeah My grandparents had eight Yeah And one died Yeah.

So they had nine, but that one didn't make it. And yeah, it's like a Boston Irish Catholic thing. You couldn't wrap it, couldn't kill it. You had to keep it. Yeah, it's crazy. It's like now it's like the craziest thing ever when people don't use birth control. And I'm like, welcome to Boston in the 70s and 80s. 70s and 80s.

Like nobody used birth control. No, you couldn't. It was against Jesus. Yeah, of course. Yeah. Everyone went to church back then too. Yeah. Sunday church.

Go to Sunday church. I did until I did until I was probably like 12 and then I got my confirmation when I was 15. So I went again for a year because my mom wanted me to get married in a Catholic church before the scandal happened. And it was hard to get married in the Catholic Church. Now it's now because the guy sucked off a bunch of kids. You can do whatever you want in the Catholic Church. You can do whatever you want.

Yeah, you can be gay. You can marry a fucking dude. It's crazy. And people are like, oh, the Catholic Church got, yeah, I don't. It was the best thing that ever happened. For progressives? Oh, yeah, absolutely. Yeah, those priests, they should be, I'm not honored.

But at least remembered? I couldn't imagine how the Catholic Church would react to some of the things that are happening now. Oh, from the 70s and 80s? Yeah, or even like if Boston from Catholic Boston saw, what's banana ball? Have you ever seen that? The banana baseball? Yeah. Base baseball.

Like, it's extremely gay. Is it? It's so, it's so gay. It's gay? Yeah, it's like, corny and gay. I shouldn't say corny and gay in the same sentence, but it's, it's so, and the Catholic, like, you know how Boston is when it comes to baseball. Yeah. And they're like, baseball is pure.

Like, I remember my dad flipped out at the idea of after the baseball strike, and they started handing out balls to little kids. My dad lost his mind. Because you're supposed to get it. Because you're supposed to get it from a bat. You know, I'm supposed to... My dad lost his mind over that, and he said it was ruining baseball. I couldn't imagine what he would think. And I blame the...

I don't blame the priest, but the priests, they changed the entire culture of Boston. Because of what they did. Because of what they did. So it's like no longer... You can't do it because Jesus, they just... All the world's changed. Yeah. Because we found out they're a bunch of idiots.

Yeah, they fucked it all up. There was a... My cousin goes to a very progressive church when her family in Western. Jester. And there was like, it was a time, like the priest got on stage with his husband. And I was like, all right, this is chill. And they kissed in front of everyone. And there

was, there was a part of me that was like, that wasn't a Catholic church. I don't want to, I don't want to be here. It was a, it was a progressive. Listen, the, that was a progressive flag in the back. It was a progressive denomination. Yeah, dude, that's not. It wasn't Catholic. I agree. We made some, we made some progressive movement. We didn't go that far.

No, it was, it was like, and it was like that, you can come, but keep the part. They kissed. And then they, looked over at the audience, like, someone going to say something? My grandfather would have. Yeah, probably. Yeah, Catholic Church, I used to go to St.

Raphael's all the time, and it was every Sunday, and it was the most boring. Catholic Church fucking killed me. And I just was waiting for that little biscuit at the end, just to get that little jolt of food. This is very

autistic, but I liked it because it was the same thing every time. Oh. It was so... It was like Excel. Yeah, it was like you knew, like, at 12 past, they were going to do the little bell thing. Lingling, ling. Yeah, like, it was so consistent.

Yeah, Catholic Church is like, let's go. Yeah. It's like Vegas. Yeah. It's like doing a show in Vegas. We want to show over by eight. I don't care. Yeah, we went to four o'clock mass on Saturdays.

It was over at 4.45. Yeah. Like on the dot. Yeah. On the fucking dot, outside, shaking hands back, where you're going. Yeah. Yeah, Catholic Church was good like that. But that 45 minutes seems like three hours something.

Yeah. I remember just, remember the little, in the pews, they had the little coat or hat holder. Yes. And you could flick it. I remember just flick it. Oh, yeah. And I would go kink, pink, and I'd get slapped upon my grandmother.

I'd get in trouble for flipping up the, the Neil thing. Oh, the Neil thing, yeah. I used to play with that a lot. Yeah. I used to get in trouble for that. I used to love the deal thing, because you could just put your head down and pretend like you were praying. I know.

And take a little quick nap, a little power nap for a second, on Jesus. Yeah, church. Nobody goes to church. Nobody goes to church anymore. It's kind of sad. I think church, for me,

I know a lot of bad shit happened. We can't ever recover from it because everybody who hates church or thinks church is bad always goes, yeah, but they fuck kids. It's like, yes, they did. But not all of them. Not all of them.

A lot of them. Not all them. The people that, like, didn't get fucked, though, are the best people in the world. Like, my family that's ultra-religious. and they're like small town, they like sing in the church choir, whatever.

Yeah. Just that sense of community that gives you. Are you talking about Protestants or Catholics, though? You keep talking about Protestants. No, these are Catholics. Catholic? Catholic, is that crazy? Catholic, is that crazy?

No choir in a Catholic. No choir? No. Maybe Protestant. No. Alt of boy, that was it. No, all the girls. Yeah, you have like one lady

that sits at a podium and sings. Maybe that might be Protestant does. That's what they should have done to fix the church. Instead of all the boys have altar girls. Yeah. They're getting the back back. I want nothing to do with that. It's easy to get overwhelmed when it comes to supplements.

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effectiveness or quality prescription required see website for full details restriction and important safety information individual results may vary based on the study of topical or oral monocidal and finaster stride um yeah i remember yeah going to church i want to start taking my kid to church i think it's not a bad my my mom literally like we weren't religious we just went to church um And she told me that the reason why she took us to church was to get us prepared for school. And she wanted to teach us how to sit there for an hour. That's why she took us to church is literally so that we could sit there for an hour. And then, like, she met her friends in church.

Well, also it gives a kid a moral compass. You will pick something up. You will pick up, hey, don't fuck your neighbor's wife. Yeah. You know what I mean? Don't kill anybody. There's a couple things you will pick up. Yeah.

Hold the door. Say please. Say thank you. Yeah, maybe. I'm not positive that I, like, I'm not positive I picked up on, like, CCD. I remember thinking, I remember in college, I didn't really realize Jesus was like somebody, a person, like, I thought it was like almost a children's book character. What, like, like, like, I didn't really. Like, I didn't really. Like, I didn't, like, never really picked up on, like, the church wasn't just like, I just, I literally never thought about it.

Um, outside of going. Oh, you never thought about. J.C. or any of his things? I didn't think about it and then in college. Even with that smoking hot statue they had in there? I know. I know. It's distracting. You ever see the, I forget what it was. Oh, it's Seguera, his new show, which is nuts. Have you seen it? No. It's bad thoughts. It's so out there. It's nuts. They have one episode where this lady lived her whole life for Jesus. She did no bad. She never sinned. She did everything right. She had Jesus all over her.

you know, the sexy Jesus, you know, looking down and prayed every day and did the right thing all the time. And then she dies, has a heart attack and dies. And she gets up there and he gets up to the gates. And he's like, looking, he's like, oh, my God, you are so good. St. Peter's like, you are, wow, you get to, I'm like, he wants to meet you. Jesus wants to meet. You. You were going right in and she went in and Jesus came down and he was fat. And he had like, acne and he had like he was balding and she's like who's that he's like I'm Jesus Christ no no no no who are you really because all the Jesus things are sexy she fell in love with Jesus she thought she wanted me to you she liked hot Jesus she's like yeah I'm good but she just leaves

was it a white guy yeah was white guy yeah that makes this historically isn't white but yeah wow he was tan yeah sure yeah what was he was like... He was like Arab. Yeah, he was Arab. Yeah, but you're not going to get a bunch of fucking white people in America. No, absolutely not. Absolutely not.

Yeah, we're not going to... Not in Boston. Yeah, we're not going to... We're not going to a preto guy who has, like, a beard that connects to his eyebrows. Yeah. They really did make him hot. They make the cross smell. They really did.

They really did make them hot. Smoking hot. They gave him a six-pack. Yeah. Amazingly hot. Yeah. And you know Jesus was not shredded. No.

There was no... There was no working out back then. You were probably just a thin dude. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that Seguro show was funny. He just had a dude shows up. He's like, what's up? Hey, you doing?

And he's just a fat pot-belly Jesus. Yeah, but growing up in Boston. Dude, I miss old Boston. Yeah, I miss it too. Because you lived in Somerville, too. Yeah, I live in Somerville. Boston's funny. It's like, it's almost not common that I meet somebody from Boston.

Unless I hang out with people I went to high school with. Yeah. I don't really see people. from Boston anymore. Everybody's from... Somewhere else. They went to college here. They stayed here.

They came here for work. Or came here. I'm in New York, but they came to Boston for work. Like, everybody... Yeah, it's all... Like, the Boston accent's leaving. Yeah. I don't have as sick of an accent as I used to.

Yeah. I mean, it's still there. Yeah. But, yeah, mine comes out when I'm angry or fucking tired. Yeah, if I'm hanging out with people from Boston, it comes out. It's so sad. I love the accent.

Yeah. I do, too. It's my favorite. Yeah. I love going home and hanging out with my brother and his friends and my sister. And they all got the fucking, come here, fucking kid. Oh, it's the best. Yeah, come here.

What the fuck you're doing, dude? Get over here. Yeah. I'm like, where you go, you fucking go, I love going back to Boston because it just comes right back to me. Yeah. I think Boston is, Boston people are the fucking best. Agreed. They're the best.

Agreed. I know you're a New Yorker. I've never been. I've never been, I've been, my brother went to college there, but I've like never explored the city much. Where are you in the... Because your dad had a bunch of kids. Where are you in that? Yes, I'm the first one.

You're the first. Because Greg Drellda Jr., people usually... But you said, did you have an older brother, you said? I did not. No, I'm the oldest one. You're the oldest one? You're younger brother? Younger brothers, yes.

He's going to school there? Just graduated. They went to... He went to Tufts, so... Oh, yeah. My uncle was a cop there. He probably knows about it. Hey, baby.

First time I got arrested was Tufts. Oh, well. What'd you do? Me and my friend, Frankie, they have that big Spicer field where they practice by the college. And we used to go there

and rip down the fences, like the baseball fences. And the soccer poles, we used to let him on fire. That's awesome. And they had a beautiful wooden fence for the baseball team. We were just ripping it down

because we were just shithead. Boston fucking idiots. And I remember seeing the cops coming down. I go, yo, cops. And he went, just chill out. I was like, what? Run.

He goes, no, don't run. And they came, drove right on the field, grabbed my friend Frankie. Wow. threw him in the back seat. and then was talking to me and then I looked in the backseat

and the dumb cop left his hat his little fucking hat in the backseat and Frankie just started fucking ripping it apart and he was holding up the window going fuck you and he's like put my hat down he just became a human

put my hat down and he was like fuck you and it was just all shredded it was so funny because my uncle became a cop there later and he was a cop there for 40 years but he had me do a benefit for those cops for the Tufts beliefs one time

and that cop was there. Whoa. Oh, you remembered it? I remembered it. And I brought him and I sat him in the middle and I just trashed him. Oh, so you recognized him? When my uncle was like, that's the guy.

My uncle, he goes, that's the guy who arrested you. And I was like, all right, and I fucking put him in the middle in the chair. And I found out all the other cops hated this guy, too. What a revenge to him. Nobody liked this guy. They still have the hat? No, you had a new hat.

Yeah, Somerville now, I mean, when I grew up, dude, it's so gingerfine. See, Boston, people don't know this about Boston. Boston was segregated. It's super sorry. It's still segregated. But back then it was like segregated. Way war, by.

Like Medford was, the town of Medford was segregated. The Italians lived here. The Irish lived here. The Brazilians lived there. We didn't have Brazilians. Now we have Brazil. Oh, it was blacks. Yeah.

We had blacks. They lived over here. And then I remember when the Asians came, the town was panicking. Yeah. We were like, what are they going to go? Yeah, what are they? Wow. And they lived up above the pharmacy.

And there was like a, like 30 of them. And we didn't know. that because we went over there to fuck with them one day and they 30 of them just came out of the house and chased me and my friends down the street. We didn't understand what was happened. There was little fucking Chinese dudes were like, fuck-a-la-da. And we're like, what are they saying? I don't know, kid.

Just keep fucking running. There's a lot of them. And like, even like Somerville. Because if you were from Medford, you couldn't go to Somerville. I wasn't allowed in Somerville. Yeah, they were fucking up. Yeah. They were fucking up. Where are you from? As soon as you go, they were away from, Medford and they just start fucking hitting you. Wow. Yeah. We just, towns didn't like it.

other yeah and then parts of towns didn't like other like we didn't like the north uh like car park was where the irish hung out i hung out at tufts park where the italians hung out and if we ever met somebody from car park we'd fight it was just crazy stupid yeah 1970s 80 shit that it just it was just the way it was back then the sports games had to be crazy then right wow that was the thing that united us whoa but like the we're like a town football game or something I didn't play football The town sports weren't a big Aren't a big thing

You didn't have We didn't we had like We weren't a professional sports But went on to college A little bit when Doug Flutie was around Okay A little bit But we don't care about college

Or high school sports at all We don't give a shit about that And you didn't have a football team In high school Yeah We didn't have Like every school has a football team Now lacrosse team

Hockey team Hockey team wrestling team That's like movie shit Yeah We didn't have that If you wanted to play hockey You had to go fucking go and play hockey on some team at the rink. Or if you, there was, or go to college.

Like, they didn't have high school football. We had Pop Warner. Yeah. Which was like, you know, like a month or so in the summer, you could join it if you wanted to play. Well, a place like Medford, they had nowhere to put the field. No, they had no, yeah, we had no field. We had no, we had no sports at all. It's urban.

Like, there's nowhere to put stuff. Yeah, it was like, yeah, exactly. Boston, it's not like New York where it's like kind of planned. Like Boston, they just stuck things places. Yeah. That's right. And if you wanted to make a football field, you have to knock down houses. Yeah, the only ones that had football fields were, like, colleges.

Wow. The super rich towns and suburbs. Yeah, like West, Winchester. Yeah. Winchester was a rich town. Yeah. I dated a girl from Winchester. Yeah, you're on the north side, I don't know the south side.

But yeah. Right, yeah, yeah, yeah. Boston was fucking awesome, awesome. 70s, 80s, 90s was a great place to live. Yeah. Those sports store, like, I'm a big basketball guy. And those days at the Boston Garden just seems. So electric.

I remember that. I remember Larry Bird. Oh, my God. We were big into the Celtics, big into the Red Sox. We were, holy shit, the Bruins. Bork. Remember Bork? Neely and all that.

Yeah, the Patriots, we really run into. Well, the Patriots, when the Patriots come in 1976. Yeah, 76. I remember my dad, we grew up Giants fans until the Giants fucked us. And what year was it that the Giants beat us? that was uh was a 2007

talking about recently or it was yeah it was like 2007 and uh I think 11 yeah I think it was 2007 they did it twice you don't have to yeah oh my god damn god damn new yorker with the helmet the helmet catch yeah the fucking bullshit catch yeah it was garbage yeah yeah yeah is that

was that catchy legal no you guys are ruining my best childhood memory right now it was fucking 18 and no yeah it would have been the perfect season would have wiped out the Miami's fucking dumb perfect 16 and 0 whatever they had which was garbage and we would have the perfect season

and another Super Bowl we were the best team ever that year and the dumb stupid giants and the retarded Eli brother yeah ugh yeah and then you all the favor oh fuck off all the favor you're only a

Hall of Fame because of us 100 yeah yeah yeah that's exactly why you're a hall of famer I'm okay totally okay with that we should have two Super Bowls two more Brady would have two more. At least one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. At least the first one.

And we supported the Giants until you guys did that to us. Really? Yeah, we hated the Yankees. Yeah. Okay. We, like, the Giants were, like, my dad grew up a Giants fan. He brought us up Giants fans because the Patriots sucked. They sucked.

And then the Giants were always our second favorite team until you guys. Wow. Fucked us. Yeah. Because I have, like, my brother has stories of, like, people would wear like Eli Manning jerseys in Boston and, like, everyone would try to to fight them. Not before 2007. Not before 2007. After 2007, yes.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, the thing was too is that it was the Yankees Red Sox and the Lakers Celtics. We hated Lakers fans. Fuck you. Oh, my God. I hate it. But Yankees' Red Sox has to be the great at least growing up was the greatest

fucking rival with. See a Yankee fan, oh, I just hated your faces. You know what I mean? They all look gray. To me, a Yankee fan all looked the same. Pinstripe thing? Yeah, the pinstripe, but the, they always had that little grave,

that little beard, that little five o'clock shadow, some stupid mustache. We hated you guys. Yeah. And if you came to Fenway Park, you'd be fucked up. Those days are gone.

Yeah. I miss it a little. I'm sad I wasn't around. Because back then there wasn't social media so you couldn't humanize each other. So it was just like, I would just imagine like, oh,

it's there the other, right? Yeah. You just hate them for everything they stand for. Well, they're fucking Yankees. They beat us every year. Yeah.

Never could win anything. Anytime we got close, you'd fucking do some stupid shit. And you guys had fucking 3,000 fucking championships. Hated you. Yeah. Yeah, Boston, we've eased up as a city on the Yankees.

Yeah, we just kind of like friendly. Well, you know why. Yeah, to 9-11. Because we had the Boston bombing. Well, no, that's that would do it? Yeah. No. That's my turning point.

No, it was because we won. Yeah, that too. We beat them. Yeah. We won 2025. Yeah. 2000, what was it, 2004? Yeah, 2004.

We won, and it was no... Yeah. We weren't the fucking loser. And then we won everything. And then we won it. The Celtics won. The Bruins won. The fucking Patriot.

We became a... We were always the losers. Yep. Boston was a blue-collar fucking loser town. And we had hate. Our road sucked. Everybody sucked. We were fucking segregated.

We fucking... The only thing we came together on was the fucking Celtics and the Red Sox. And then all of a sudden we won every. We won the World Series, the big dig got finished. Like, everything just kind of happened in all, yeah. Now it's just a bunch of fucking happy people. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. A bunch of Scottish people. Oh, that was great. I know. It was so awesome. I'm so sad. I wasn't there. Yeah. I want them all to move to Boston.

I do too. Maybe we'll all become Boston from the 70s and 80s again. I know. It would be wild. We're just racist. I want it to all be Scottish people again. I like these immigrants. I don't know what.

Well, there's a reason why we like those immigrants. Like, this is Boston. Yeah. And did you grew up in Manhattan? I did. We had a lot of immigrants. Yeah. Did you have to go to like a P-17 school?

A P-S? Yeah. P-S school? I did. I did. How was it? It was great. I loved it.

You did? It's bullshit, though. You want to hear, oh, you don't talk about segregation. This is some fuck shit. They don't do this anymore. But you had to, like, test in to get to my middle school and high school. and it ended up being like all predominantly like Jewish and Asian kids in the good school

and black kids in the not good school because you had to take tests? Yeah. Okay. And we were... Because you're elementary schools. What? Because you're elementary schools. Well, elementary schools were the same.

Oh, okay. It was just elementary school was by district, but middle schools were by test. Like you could test it. Well, I mean you had a shitty elementary school and you're going to test. Oh, yeah, yeah. No, yeah, for sure. And, you have a socioeconomic, blah, blah, blah.

But yeah, it was, it was, we were terrified of each other. It was so sad. Well, did you test into the... I tested the Jewish one, yeah. You did? I did. Are you Jewish? I'm not.

I'm Latin Catholic. Latin Catholic. Latin, not that Catholic. Gay priest Catholic. Right. Did you get molested? I did not. Oh, yet.

God damn. There's still time. No. No. Well. Yeah, I guess not. Nobody's India anymore. Yeah, that's true.

I've aged out. Yeah, you'd rat them out. I got a big mouth down. You bring it on stage and do a joke about it. Oh, my God. That would, yeah, that'd be great. Man, I wish I was molested. My son was born in Manhattan, too, which I love that he was born in Manhattan.

So, I mean, you grew up on the train. You grew up taking the train. You grew up as a New Yorker. Yeah, and that, I loved it. Because I think you would, I have this theory about suburban life that I think Manhattan life is a lot better until you're like 16. And then 16 years old, once you get cars that I think suburban life takes off. Yeah. But I was independent from like 12 years old on.

Right. Yeah. So I can go wherever I want. It was great. You could just get it at Metro Card and just go. Yeah, exactly. And your mother let you do it. No, but who cares? Wow. All right.

Well, you are lucky dad. Maybe. Yeah, no, I think kids, like, I bring my kid to the city all the time. I think kids growing up in the city, you learn, you get so much more education of people in life that you're not afraid. You know, growing up in Boston, I didn't know there was another world. Like, it didn't even compute to me. I remember when we take a drive to Hampton, Beach and it felt like seven days.

And I recently just did it. I think it's 45 minutes or an hour. Yeah, it's like 45 minutes or an hour. So I remember just being in the car going, are we there? I know. And now it's like, it's like that was the world to me. Going to Hampton Beach or going to like, you know, Gloucester. Yeah, Cape Cod.

Oh my God. Cape Cod was a fucking nine, a mind-numbing drive over the bridge. The bridge. Yeah, we never went anywhere. You went to the park. Like when we, 70s and 80s, you didn't do shit. Say 70s, 80s 90s, you didn't, there was no vacation to another country. There was no fucking, you know, getting on a plane or going somewhere.

We went to Nantasket in Quincy. Nantucket or Nantasket? Oh, Nantazkitt. It's in Quincy. It's in Quincy. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Because I grew up on the south side. We used to go to the beach in East Boston. Yeah. We would watch. It was right across you from the airport. His glass. So you just see fucking. fucking jumbo jets going

Vrrr Yeah, the Nantask it though The airport is it On the other side of it Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We didn't go anywhere We didn't, you didn't do shit You didn't see the world Yeah, you didn't, you just, you went to school

Summer vacation, you went to the park You had Park League, they had one fucking dude that'd be sitting there with a bag of shit, a basketball, a fucking bat And then, speaking of fucking Oh, it's Rich Voss Rich Voss You know I'm on my podcast

I keep forgetting I always you know what I leave my meeting on Tuesday and I guess subconsciously I'm subconscious Yeah whatever the word is I have I guess my subconscious

Yeah Me a favor Sunday I have Greg Giroaldo Jr. Greg Darylado's son is on And Janet McNamara She's from Boston very funny comedian. Yes.

This is like talking to my mother. What's happening? What do you want? I saw a great Jargo's son's clip where the blind guy in the audience thought he was a very funny clip

and it brought me back to you know, good memories. Good memories. Thank you. Are you having a stroke right now? What the fuck is happening? No. You say something mean, but then I go in something.

Just be you, Voss. Nobody expects you to become a better person. When I was barking on the street every time I would, I would nervously be like, hi, hi, Voss, then Voss would just turn over and scream, get funny. Keep going. You know? And the girl from Boston. Yeah.

What brings her to New York? What brings her to New York? I moved here. That's a good reason. Yeah. Damn, Bob. You're just, Bobby, you're just running out of guests. Honey, what are you talking about?

I'm a big fan. Shut up, those dog trainer. It's his son, you piece of shit. It's his son. This is generational fucking comedy. And Janet is a very funny comedian. I'm a big fan. Yeah, I heard you are great, which.

She said... I heard you crushed like a month ago. She said she heard you crush like a month ago. Every time to thank you. I like her. That's all it takes. That's all it takes. Go ahead.

I like it. I've heard you. I bought this little... I bought this, you know, like surveillance camera. You know, a little thing. Wait a minute. You bought a surveillance camera. Wait a minute.

Stop. Yeah. Why would you buy a... What is it? 87? Did you just get done watching risky business? But surveillance camera Everybody has a fucking

A motion detector A little thing that you see if somebody's breaking in You mean the ring camera Oh God I wish I didn't have a ring on my phone I wish you had a ring around your neck My fucking hands What I'm saying is

Hurry up Shannon has autism I'm losing her dude I'm losing her right now. I'm going to have to bring out a computer with Excel sheet on it just to get her back. I had to hook those up to your phone. Yes, I do.

You're invited me to a barbecue to help you hook up a fucking ring camera? Put together a nice set of clubs for your show. All right. Who are you surveilling, Bonnie? She cheats. She guys, I hope she tells me about it in detail. From size,

from size to color. All right. All right. I'll help you hook her. I'll help you hook her. I need to get hard again. A little Giravo,

keep up to good work. Good work. And tell the skirt, I'm a big fan of her. I don't think she's ever worn her skirt, but yes. I will tell Janet. Yeah.

And the little kid, whatever his fucking name is. I mean, Giroldo? I mean, it's fucking our friend. You piece of. of shit. All right, goodbye.

I'm surprised he didn't change his name to Rock and be the 7th Rock. What? Shut up. It cut out. I didn't hear you. You surprised it. Oh, the Rock. One of the Rock. Oh, okay. What a fucking asshole.

Oh, man. He knows I'm doing the podcast, and he just calls. I got to shut my phone. Well, let's not get carried away, okay? Your father was one of the best. Voss is good. He took a long time to get to a very simple point. I mean, dude, it's funny to see your friend just get old and stammer. He used to be fast as lightning.

Really? That's good. Really? Yeah, in my day. Back in my day. It is, we were talking about the 70s, 80s, and 90s. I feel bad for kids because we didn't have to care about any of the shit they have to care about. Like, we didn't know even the fucking, we didn't, the news was.

boring. Could you? I used punishment for me. My grandfather would make me watch the news. Like the 5 o'clock news. Get over and I've just sit next to him and today. And I'm like, ugh, I fucking want to kill myself. Now every kid is like in the news

all the time. You know everything about everything. Yeah? How do you feel about Palestine? How do I feel about Palestine? No, is his boss on the phone or is he not on the phone? He's not on the phone. That's funny. So you, did you go to call I did go to college, yes. I went to Lafayette College in Easton, Pennsylvania. For what? For finance and government. And why did you, how did it, why comedy? Did your mother try to you to say don't do this?

Uh, yeah, sort of. I think I just like, yeah, so I was, I, I think she was just happy that I had something to put my energy to. I was kind of like a listless kid. Yeah? Just kind of do what, like, and I was, you know, I was pretty committed early on and that, like, I was just always doing it. Right. She got on board. She was very supportive. She gave me some, like, it's so funny seeing it because my mom obviously grew up around it and she gave you, she had advice.

Yes. Don't have sex with a waitress at a club. Well, she told me the opposite. She was, Marrier. If you have sex with that waitress, don't cheat. No, but she was like, she didn't understand that, you know, I started.

When you start coffee, you don't know what the hell you're doing. So she would be like, I did like, I did like, like four mics. My mom is like, you have a lot of angst. And I was like, what? She said, you have a lot of angst. If you have angst, use it. Yeah. And four, no one wants to see that. If you're a new comic, angst. Yeah. I don't

even know what angst is. Yeah, I was about, I felt like I was stupid. It's like sad emo energy. What, like anger? Yeah, well, it's like, it's like self-hatred and anger for the world. Right. Yeah. Yeah. But it's not, it's not like, it's just sad, but it's like a sad anger. Boston's a more aggressive anger. Well, we get aggressive because we're fucking alcoholics.

Yeah, that's fun. We start drinking at like 10. That's great. Yeah. That's funny. My kid has the accent once in a while. That's awesome. Every once in a while I go, Dad, Camilla.

But I know he's doing it just to do it, but I love hearing my son. He grew up in New York, though, right? Grew up in New York, but Pat's. Yeah. I gave him one year to like Tampa Bay. He was like, make a choice right now, but you can't come back. You go one year with Tampa Bay while he's on the team And then when he leaves

You either come back or you stay But I said if I ever see you with a Yankee head on You might as well find another fucking place to live Oh absolutely It's not gonna happen No It's the Red Sox you son of a bitch But yeah he's uh

He's uh I don't know if he has angst I don't know what fucking angst is Yeah I think angst is a Gen Z term Maybe Do you guys do you guys have like emo bands I guess not? What? Do you have emo?

I didn't hear about emo And, like, emo wasn't... When we grew up, emo was with a gays. Yeah, no, emo means, like, emotional. Oh. Yeah, it means that, like, I can see that you're sad. Yeah, like I said, it was the gays. Yeah.

If you were a sad kid when we were growing up, like, fucking pussy. Yeah, dude, we didn't have time to be sad. The gays don't have angst anymore. They're the opposite of angsty. No, no, no. No, gazing. Yeah, you just, when you were sad, you just ripped down fences. at Tufts University.

I just drank. I did when you were sad. Yeah, we've, Boston, it was just like, I don't think. Yeah, it just came out as anger. You can't be, yeah, you can't be sad.

You know, if I went home and said, Mom, I'm sad. She'd be like, toughen up. Yeah. Get your shit together. I remember my mom saying to me one night, uh, listen,

just bury it. Wow. Just bury it. Just push it down. Yeah. I was brought up like that. Yeah. Just push it.

I don't understand why you have to say it. Yeah. Why do you say it all. I remember I was asking my mom of helping my homework one night, and she got so fresh. She goes, I already did this. I don't know what the hell I'm doing. Just do it. Get it done.

And just left me at a table alone, not knowing how to do division. And I just sat there like, I have nobody. And I just fucking wrote shit down and failed. Yeah. And I didn't take the hit. Yeah. I mean, fucking crazy. When were you, how old were you in your father passed?

It's 10 years old. Shit. Yeah. Speaking of angst. Thanks. Okay. That sucks, man. That sucks.

It probably didn't affect me. The way that I think of that now is way different than I probably thought of it. I mean, I probably fucking sucked back then, but now having a 13-year-old, it's just like, fuck, I couldn't have mad. Yeah, when I, I guess I got the invite to do a show at the cellar,

I told a couple of my friends, and they were all like, oh, Bobby's getting sentimental. I know. It was like the same day he posted a clip. He's like, I'm so proud to be a dad. And then, of course, two hours later, he's like, you want to come to the cellar? No, it wasn't that at all.

You piece of shit. Liz told me about you. And then I knew. But also, I was kind of interested to see if you fucking sucked or not. You know what I mean? Like, did the apple fall way away from the tree? Oh, man.

And is, like, this is going to be interesting to see, like, is he funny? Does he have his own thing? Is he up there? You know, what are you doing? And I was so, I was sitting with Liz. I'm like, he's fucking, he's good. He's actually good.

I was like so pleasantly surprised that you didn't eat your own dick and you had your own thing going on. You have that little fucking smile. You're likeable. Well, thank you. I got told me. You're an acquired taste. I'm likable to some people.

A demographic. Yeah. I have a specific demographic that really likes me. I got told that I smile like I just saw tits for the first time. Oh, yeah. That's not true. That's exactly. I hate it.

He does. You do. I hate how great it is. Yeah, it's 100% when you're on stage. It's like you just saw tits for the first. I'm so happy. I'm just happy to be there. Are you really this happy?

Yeah, I'm a pretty happy guy, I think. You still live at home? Still live at home. Yeah? Oh, that's good. Your mom's fucking let you stay home. She's good. How old are you know?

25. 25. Oh, wow. That's good that your mom lets you live at home. It is, it is good. Fuck yeah, dude. Yeah. You got a leg up.

Yeah. You get to go home and fucking have the fridge fairy. down and like sit like recliner. A leg up means that you, like I moved to the city, I had nothing. Oh, yeah. Imagine if your mom lived in Manhattan. I'd kill myself. Yeah, that's a good point.

If I had a live up my, I moved out of my mom's house when I was 16 and a half. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Me and my mom, because we, you know, she, she grew up with me as a fucking asshole. So when I got my shit together, she still kind of treated me like I was the asshole. And I was, I was so,

I couldn't live with her. I couldn't be told. That's angst. That's angst. I don't have fucking angst. Yeah, that's angst. I don't have angst. Don't tell me I'm angst.

Are you going to cry? No, I would ever cry. See, but if you tried to fight me, that's not angst. Okay, I'm not going to fight you either. I mean, what the fuck? I want the ghost of your father to want me. Fucking make me bomb every weekend. Get them off my back, please.

Are any of your other siblings going to do it? Do they jealous that you're doing it? Or they like, what the fuck are you doing? Dude, I have one brother. He's so smart. He full ride to med school, all that. Really? Oh, yeah. So you're that one? I'm that one. He's doing great. He did it once and he was good

and I told him he sucked. You did just to get him out of your fucking way. What a piece of shit you are. No, I told me he was good after. I let him know. I was kidding, obviously. But he's going to be a doctor? He's going to be a doctor. Wow. A doctor? A doctor? A doctor? Your other brother's graduating in college? He just graduated.

he's got a job at Deloitte now. He actually also didn't, he didn't wait tables, but he like worked the door here for a summer. Oh, did he? Yeah, he did. And so he's, he's going to go off to do a good job?

He's making money. And what about what? You got another one? Or is that it? No, that's it. That's it. So you three. So one's a comedian.

Yes. One's going to be a doctor. Yes. And the other one's going to work. I don't know fucking DeWite is. Thanks. Yeah. It's like a consultant company.

Yeah. She's in. Do you want me to talk about Delight? I'll talk about To wait. Yeah, tell me about Dwight. It's like, basically you know everybody's getting laid off when they bring in Deloitte. Yeah. Oh, really?

It's a bunch of consultants that come in and they, like, we structure companies. But it's basically a way, it's like a consulting firm that, like, they all make a million dollars. But you know that movie where it's like, my job is to just fire people and I go across. That's basically what your brother does. So your brother's going to be a fucking asshole. Is he me a prick? Yeah, sure. Yeah, if you hear Deloitte's coming to your company.

you update your resume. You update your resume? Yeah. And you fucking... They're going to be like, oh, she doesn't... This job could actually be two jobs. So then now your workload either doubles or you get laid off. So you fucking... Jesus Christ.

Oh, my God. My brother. I didn't know. I knew the vague. Interesting hearing it from your perspective. Oh, yeah. They're nice until they leave. And then once they leave...

Did you ever get the whited? I got my job doubled. You got your job double. Yeah. So the person, me and another person did the same job. And then she got fired and I had to take over all of her work because they decided that. But you were excited about that because you got more Excel. Honestly, kind of.

You were? I was like. I was like, I don't know, it was, I don't know, it was, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, like, it's, like, have made the cut. but like I don't know I just I worked I worked a lot of hours and I kind of liked

the challenge of like taking on new templates and like making them better and trying to like do the double the work in half the time I was I'm like I'm crazy this is like impressively autistic yeah

yeah like I like honestly like they did give really good some of the suggestions were really like not even close to reality. But some of them were like, oh, I'd never, like, that's actually a thing I could do.

But it would, like, you end up, like, working your ass off for, like, three months and then realizing that you just made something way easier so that somebody dumber than you can now do it. Yeah. And that's ultimately what happened to me. And you got fired?

I kind of. I ended up, I, like, got overworked and I lost my mind, and then I got fired. You lost your mind? Yeah. How'd you lose? Like, what happened? It was a whole thing.

What happens when you lose your mind? Huh? Like, I thought Spotify was trying to kill me at one point. Whoa. It was pretty, it was pretty, it was pretty fucking, How would Spotify kill you? They had like an off, they had like a satellite office across the street from me.

And they were they trying to kill you? It was like, they had these, like, concerts and I, at one point, I thought they were, like, spying on me. I made all my friends deleted from their phones. It was a whole. Oh, so you lost? It was a whole, like, I literally lost my mind. Did you tell the odds?

doctor this huh yeah you would have got right in no they gave me bipolar oh okay are you bipolar too i don't know um i keep getting like diagnosed and not diagnosed right with everything really like my psychiatrist just told me the one that um i had in boston at the very end on our last day she was like um she was like maybe when you moved to new york like you could think about like getting off like getting off a lot of these meds because like they have a really bad side of vaccine i was like yeah i gained 60 pounds and she was like, yeah, I feel bad about that. What the fuck? That's literally what she said.

And I was like, because she was like, I don't know if you're bipolar. I think you're just very anxious and probably autistic. But for whatever reason, you're not autistic because you keep failing the test. I don't know how you could be so smart at your job, but not pass this autistic test. The autistic test, I'm telling you, I'm going to pass. I have some not autistic friends that have passed this test. Yeah, I'm going to pat, because I didn't, I didn't know until very recently that you have to study for it. What do you study?

You have to, like, tell them, yes, I have a special interest. I like Excel, and then you have to talk about Excel for 20 minutes. Right. That's the test? Yeah. What the, really? Yeah. That's the best we have.

So, like, what they do to me is there like, is there anything that you're really, really interested in? And I'm like, no, not really. You shouldn't say that. I think you. Now I know that. You should just say, yes. And I'd like to talk about it for the next three hours. That I know now that that's what I have to do.

So next time, are you going back in for it? Yeah. And you're going to pass it? I'm going to pass it. What are you going to do? Go, hey, you guys ever hear about Excel and just start talking about it? I'm going to tell them that I wore a life jacket when I was a little kid. What?

I'm going to tell them. I'm going to give them a lot of things. Wait, stop real quick. I have a joke about it, but yeah. You wore a life jacket for how many years? Like, I don't, a couple years. Why? Because I liked it.

It looked cool. What the fuck? Hey guys, you want to vet these guests a little? Yeah, what the fuck? She's on medication. It's my album cover. It's me wearing a life jacket, like, just in my backyard. But what?

But this is why I like her. I'll tell you, dude, she's one of the weirdest clues fucking comics. Because I've seen so many comics over the years. I get it. Usually a girl comic, usually like, guys, and I saw her, and I was this fucking jake out of her. bye. Oh yeah.

I'm, I'm nuts. Yeah, but it's so great for comedy, dude. Was there a party that, like, hoped there was a flood? A flood? Yes. Oh, so I could use a life jacket?

I don't know. I was a little kid. Like, I don't even know if it comprehended to me on why I was even wearing it. If my kid was like, I'm going to wear a life jacket, I'd be like, no, you're not. And he'd be like, no, I want to wear it.

It makes me feel good. I'd be like, yeah? Well, get a vest. How I wear a vest most of the time now. But, like. Oh, you still, does it Does it have like replaced the... That's like what people say.

I think it... I just like it. You like a vest? Yeah. Would you like the vest more if it made you float? Did you... I don't think a lot of it has to... Did you go to school with a life jacket?

I did. Whoa. What the fuck? They didn't let... They said I couldn't bring it back. To school. You couldn't bring it back? Like you went for a day and then...

I went for a day and then they told me I couldn't bring it to school anymore. Yeah, they were trying to save your life. But I remember. being so upset because I wore it for like an entire summer. And then on the first day, like, first day school or at some point, like the teacher was like, you can't bring the life jacket to school. How did you fail this test? Yeah. I didn't mention that.

You have any photos? It's my album covers. Why don't you, why, you should open with, I wore a life jacket for three years. Yeah. I know. That's, I'm telling you, you have to be prepared for these tests and you have to have the examples because during the test you panic and you just say no. So that's what I kept doing Is every time on the test

They asked me like Do you have sensory issues And I'd say no Do you have sensory issues? Now I know I do What is it? Like clothing wise I like I wear like clothes

That are too big And stuff like that And I don't like people touching my arms Whoa Who the fuck likes people touching their arms I know it's weird Except if they're these Yeah

I have decent issues with like Century stuff But like at the time I No I would just say no. Because I grew up in Boston in the 90s. If the fucking tags in my shirt

bothered me, my mom would be like, get over it. Yeah, get over. Like, I wasn't allowed to have issues. Yeah. So it was like I moved on. Well, that's like a waitresser came up to me my wife last week in a rest. She goes, anybody have food allergies?

You're like, yeah, we're from the 70s and 80s. It doesn't matter. We'll deal with the rash. Yeah. And we'll fuck it. We'll blow off the swelling. Just give us the food. That's what's confusing.

They're like, did you have meltdowns and stuff as a kid? I was like, I wasn't allowed to have a meltdown. You can't. No. No, get your shit together. Exactly. Like, there was no, none of the, none of that was allowed. No.

Like, yeah. But don't you think we should go back to that? I kind of like it now. How about this? Kids can't, I just feel like now everybody has an excuse. Okay. Right? Yep.

Your autism, your fucking ADHD, your DDD, your D, D.D.H. you did, did, did, da, da, da, da, b, b, b, b, b, and I think kids will find their way into what they will survive their shit, they'll never lean on a crutch, and you'll find your fucking way. And the ones that are supposed to die will die. We could probably live in a world with less PTSD, is all I'm saying. Why do you have PTSD for me? Well, the 90s just caused PTSD.

I know. Like, there's no way you don't have PTSD either. Oh, I 100%. Yeah. Like, the 90s, that's what, like, 80s and, that's. That's what growing up in that time. Well, they say that I believe it's our generation grew up with depression. Yeah.

And this generation grows up with anxiety because they're afraid of everything. We are. We're not afraid of anything. Yeah. We're not afraid of it, but we're depressed because we take our fear and buried in our stomachs. Yeah. And just never deal with it. Well, you're a generation above me.

Like, you're Gen X. I'm a millennial. You're Gen Z. Like, we're three different. I hate that we even have that. Really? I think that's just a way to classify ages Yeah, fuck that You're a fucking kid

You got problems You're fucking nuts You wears a life jacket Your father passed away My father beat the shit I meant if I really had one And here we are To see how like doctors

Can't use this Like classify people Once they get involved It's like who cares Like who gives the shit You're just a weird bra That fucking doesn't like collars You know what I mean

You were just a weird chick Yeah yeah That's what I was I was I was a weird chicken school Right did you have boyfriends A little bit A little bit

Were they weird too? You ever did you ever did a regular dude Where they just kind of end up your weirdness Some Italian guy Listen I know you're a fucking weird broad But I heard you guys give great head I don't I think they're regular people

Regular dudes Has it affected your relationships I don't do relationships What? I know Wow I've been in relationships since Why

freshman year in college. No shit. Yeah. Why is this? I just like, I'm over it. I think life is simpler without it. It's just, it's a lot of work. It's a lot of energy.

I'm just. So you don't want to ever be with somebody? No. You're going to be alone? Yeah. Do you have an animal? I did. To kill it?

When you got off your meds? When I moved to New York. You got rid of it? What was it? I had two cats. Oh, you lost your cats. Yeah, I gave him away the neighbors. I gave my cat away, Bomas.

I know. It was a huge, yeah, I'm not going to cry, but this is 0% chance I'm going to cry, but yeah. Because you don't feel it. It was sad. I know. I gave my, I had a cat Bomas and I gave it to a transvestite cook that my friend worked with. And before I left, I was like, take care of Bomas.

He was like, don't worry, Daddy, I will. Like that. And I haven't seen him since. Yeah. Well, that's fucking weird. I mean, that's crazy that you don't want to... No, I don't say the point. Are you married?

I'm married with a child. Oh, okay. Yeah. I got a 13-year-old son. And I'm very... I love it. Yep. I love going home, sitting down for dinner.

I make, you know, we have... I like to be a little old school. We have breakfast in the morning. I wake up with him, even though I don't have to. Have breakfast. I walk him to the fucking bus. Yep. And you give him a kiss.

I make him give me a kiss before he leaves, even though he's 13. You're Italian. Yeah. Yeah. He gives me a kiss on either side of the cheek now. Yeah. Before he leaves. And then I make him sick about it.

Yeah, I love all that shit. I love, I love, I mean, I just grew up with it a little bit. And then it was kind of fucked up a little bit for a while. But now that I have it, I'm so happy. But that's, I mean, don't, do you, do you, you like, you have a girlfriend? I did. She actually lived right across the street from here. Really?

Yeah. How convenient was it? Oh, it was the best. I used to bang a brought across the street, too. I hope it wasn't the same ones. Well, she'd be old now. All right, wasn't the same one. Now, it was not.

I was my favorite thing, right across the street. I would do sets and then go over there. I'd take nap. She'd feed me. We'd have sex. I'd come back and do a late-night spot at the cellar. It's the best, right? It was awesome.

Yeah, now it's not that. But I do, I do want to have kids and a family and all that at some point. Yeah, you do. Which is hard, because I, like, when I grew up around is it being, really hard to do this life and have kids at the same. I'm sure, as you will know. Yeah. Like it's, I don't want to say they're incompatible, but it's really difficult. It's, well,

you have to, you have to sacrifice. Well, I had kids late. You know what I mean? If you have kids early in your career, it's tough because in the early in your career is when all the craziness is happening. When you kind of want, I enjoyed all the nutty, crazy shit, hanging out all night. I didn't really have a responsibility. Even when I was with my chick,

I could come home at 5 in the morning. She didn't get to fuck. And I had a kid at 42, kind of when I was done. I had all, and look, I've been sober for 40 years. So I wasn't really partying,

but I was definitely acting like I was partying with all the shit. But so I kind of had kids. I started a family later after I went through all the crazy shit, you know. So, I mean,

if you're going to do this business, I think it's, It is, you got to enjoy that ride up is fun. And if you, if your wife's like, when are you going to be home, you're going to fuck it. It's going to suck because you're going to hurt. You know what I mean? I didn't have that.

I had nobody, you know? And so now I love going home. I can't wait to get the fuck home. I love taking weekends. I love, if I had a weekend off back in the day, I would panic. Like my career is dying. Now I'm like, nah, I'm good. Take a weekend off.

Stay home. Fuck him with the family. you know, do stupid shit around the house. I love all that shit now. I love, I love family life. I love having a family. I love going home and, you know, I mean, it's the toughest thing ever, especially 13 of 13-year-old boy is tough. But what are you going to do?

I mean, I'm going to fucking deal with it. Every day is a different person and all that shit. But, you know, I flip out. I fucking say sorry because I'm a psycho, you know, and, you know, you do it. But, I mean, not having somebody. I don't know if I'd make it. If I didn't have something. If I didn't have a family, I'd be, I'd have AIDS.

I'd 100% have AIDS. I'd have something. I'd have something. I'd have something. I mean, that was a piece of shit, dude. I was fine. I would have. Oh, God, did I have a good time?

Oh, my Lord, did I have a good time. Do you regret any way that you did it? Not one fucking second. I don't regret anything. No, not at all. Fuck that. Why? But, I mean, it's weird, like, that you already know that you don't.

What if you mean? fucking other autistic funny guy. Are you into guys? I don't know. Okay, there you go. That's a fucking, so you haven't figured to know yet. Yeah. What if you mean an autistic girl guy?

I don't know. Have you been with a girl? You don't need to answer that. I don't know. It's like, it just, I don't know. I've been by myself for so long that I'm like, I just don't, I don't want somebody asking where I am. I don't like the answer.

Like, yeah. I mean, I tell you what. I like to do what I want to do. Yeah, I mean, that's better for your comedy. Yeah. Yeah. Because she's going to go home tonight and probably write something. I'm going to go home tonight and try to get to sleep with a snoring wife.

Then I'm going to wake up tomorrow. Yeah, you don't have to worry about whether or not you're staying, like, you're, like, there's a lot of things that it's just, you don't have to worry about. Yeah, anything. Yeah, when you're not trying to date, like, there's so many things you don't have to worry about. Like you meet somebody and you're not having that thing of like, are we attracted to each other? We're not attracted to each other. It's like, nope, it's never going to happen. Well, when you do get married, you learn that she's not.

I don't think at all to me. Yeah. Yeah, no. She's never walked by the bathroom while I was in the shower going, ooh. What? I haven't heard that in a long time. It's just two naked middle-aged people. Do you miss it?

What? Like someone being that into you or like that primal? Listen, dude, you just got to cheat. all right no i'm kidding uh no i it it uh do i miss passion i mean i don't know dude once you don't have it it's like if you don't have fucking meat for a while you probably would you know what i mean but then if i had it there was some smoking hot chick after the show that walked up and went i want to suck your face that's why she was here no oh me and her definitely we're fucking yeah

I'm going to fuck you so hard. I'll show you a spreadsheet. I'm going to X look up you all over. How funny would be if you just saw me and her hook it up. Oh, my God. I wouldn't know what to do. We're just in Washington Square Park. Tag you on my story.

Just jerking me off while she's on her phone. So I hear you have nobody. I will listen, man. I want to, I appreciate you guys coming on. I've told you, I was, I like, I like when I find somebody that I, I watched your thing, something hit me and then I just went through all your stuff. And I think you're, you know, it's very rare to you get a, you know, a comic that doesn't exist. And you're definitely, you're a comic that doesn't exist.

You remind me a Stephen Wright a little bit. You remind me, you know, it's like, but you're your own thing. You're very funny, you know, and unique, which I love. And I was so happy when I saw you at the cellar. I'm like, get the fuck out of here. She's now, says, and I'm happy for you, too, kid, that you're actually, you're in it. And you're doing it. Thank you.

Yeah, dude. You fucking, the other, I'm telling you, man, you fucking, you, um, you got your own thing. You know, you're not your dad. You're actually who you are. And, you know, having that name is not a, that's a great badge of honor that you have. and you're not fucking it up. Thank you. Well, it means a lot coming from you.

Yeah, I mean, we'll wait to see what happens with it. But around five years, we'll see if you're not. We'll see. But, no, you're doing good. I'm very excited that when I saw you actually be funny and you be yourself. It really, I told Liz, I was like, he's fucking good, man. That's so happy that you weren't some, you know what I mean? That you're doing it.

And you love it. You're not, you're you're you. 100% you. You're funny, you smile, you're having a good time on stage, you're enjoying yourself, and you're likable as fuck on stage. I love it, dude. I'm so happy you're doing it. I'm so happy you came on, and we'll definitely have you guys back on again.

So where are you going to be? We got our website up here. All right, bring it up, you a piece of shit. Talk about autism. That's all I have working for me. I'm going to be in Illinois, Urbana, August 11th, Chicago, August 12th. Cleveland in November And then

Canton, Ohio New Jersey, Austin, Texas in December. You're all over the play. You got a punchup. Yeah. Punchup. Live, baby.

Yeah, punchup. Jenna MacMachma.com. How excited to you? Do you go on the app and just fucking go through all the stuff? Huh? No, my manager does it all. I'm sorry.

I'm very, like, I'm not super involved, to be honest in this part. Dude, you should get into it. You'd love it. Really? Oh, if you've gotten to the app, dude? Oh, you can do

so many things in the punch-up app. The problem is, is that I don't like Google Sheets. Oh, I apologize. I'm sorry. I didn't know there was a Google. Is that what that is? Because you have to export the data into Google Sheets. I would have fucked with it if I still had a job when I had Excel, but I don't want to spend the money on an Excel subscription. The fuck.

A lot of sheets talk. And then I have an Apple now and the shortcuts aren't the same, so it's like harder. like my fingers don't do what this book to do it's very upsetting that you actually even brought that up the idea of doing an analysis I'm just saying if you get into the app there's a lot of functionality you can get into yeah maybe you can help Danny the owner of punch up with some flaws probably yeah get in there baby yeah I should probably figure out what data they have in there I honestly I don't even have the password to it well get it from your manager you got to do

tonight you got nobody back at the house yeah you're right yeah i don't even have cats anymore what do you got coming up buddy what are i got i have a couple headlining dates this summer uh i'm gonna post them to my instagram in the very very near future um honestly we're still finalizing a couple of dates that's why i'm post them i also truth be told uh this is the first summer i am earnestly headlining and touring and doing all that stuff really i did it a little bit last year and a little bit two years ago but like it was kind of here and there whereas this summer i like sincerely have a decent amount of dates lined up. I'm like, all right, I should actually promote this.

All right, well, I got dates coming up. Maybe I'll bring you on one. I love that. If you want to host or feature, whatever you need. Yeah? I mean, I'm not going to pay you gabbage, but that's fine. Yeah. No.

Your mother's going to be like, he paid you what? All right, well, check that out. I'm only with the mothership on July 4th weekend. God bless America. I'm excited to be working in Austin on this country's birthday, baby. 250. I'm going to be there. And then, of course, I take the summer off, but I am doing the 25th in Portsmouth, New Hampshire. I got two shows up there, September 11th. I'm in Saratoga and the 12th. And then September, I'm in the Brooklyn Improv. Maybe you pop over there with me. Sure. I love that.

And I'm all over the place. So make sure I'm going to Boston, back Laugh, Boston. I'm going to Lafayette, punchup.com. Live slash Robert Kelly. If you follow me or on this podcast, make sure you're on that, because whenever I'm going to be there, I'm going to send an email out to you from me. I write it. Now, send it out to you and you'll get it so you'll know how to buy tickets and get your asses to the show. And of course, patreon.com slash Robert Kelly, we're going to go over there and ask your questions to these lovely people. Guys, what do you got? Hey, this is Joe Russell.

Joe, how does it feel to not be the most autistic person on the show? I'm not autistic. You will be. Well, yeah, I'm about to be. You're about to. She's been graduated. It's close. She's going to get her fun.

She's going to go in and just be like, I love Excel. I wore a fucker. You should go in with the life jacket. Oh, no, I have a list. I have a list of things to talk about. You should wear the life jacket. I don't, I was like eight. I don't have the life jacket anymore.

I would actually, I would legitimately wear a life jacket. Still? I would. I am actually, I feel like they could be fashionable. Like, if it wasn't like, if it didn't like, orange and bulky. Yeah. If it didn't come off as like a bit, I would do it.

The only reason why I wouldn't do it is like the self-conscious of people being like, oh, she's doing it as a bit. I would wear one around my house. Okay, around your house, but let me ask you a question. Couldn't you make a fashionable life jacket? It's not a terrible idea. Could happen. Yeah.

I would make one. Merch. Yeah. Oh, my God. Life jacket. You should have a life jacket key chain. That's really expensive merch. That would be like a $100 life jacket for people to,

to people like to me to make any type of profit off of a custom-made life jacket. If that was her merch and you looked out in her audience and it looked like the end of the Titanic. Oh, that would be incredible. I'm sorry, Joe. Did I cut you off? I forget. No, that's fine. You just asked me how it felt.

Go ahead. Okay. Go to Instagram and just type in Jokes Russell. That's my Instagram. You should subscribe. Well, that was fucking enthusiastic. Cody, what do you got, buddy? Good to have you back.

How is Japan? Japan was great. Was it awesome? Did you get any karaoke in? I got some yokey in. You got some, uh, you got any massages? I got a massagey. You did?

I did, I got a couple of massages. I got a couple of massages. I got chased down the street by a couple ladies. I folded. You got chased? I got chased. Really, did you do, do let me? They're very aggressive, Bob.

You ever do any jihitsu or anything on them? I did. I did. Did you get me my axe? Uh, I have a surprise for you. Right now? Do you want it right now? Yes, on the show!

Oh, right. Oh, my God. Well, first of all, follow me on Instagram at Cody the Comic and come to my show at New York Comedy Club on the 28th of this month, please, for the love of fucking God. Buddy, do we have a show soon, me and you, that I can't talk about it? This Friday.

Okay, good. I'm glad you told me because I made plans. I'm going to cancel them. So we'll be hanging out Friday. Yes. All right. First of all, a little backstory. He's going to Japan. I am a huge, I love Japan. I love the Japanese people. I love the culture. I love the history. just everything about them.

They're just the best people. And I, uh, they, when they make stuff, it's like very traditional. Like I have a Japanese pocket knife. It's like one guy that can make it in Japan.

So if I, you have one, this guy, it says who made it. They like that. Like samurai swords, you know, all that stuff.

And I wanted a Japanese hatchet for the longest time. And for bushcrafting. Like I, well, not bushcraft, but I go up. It's not like I'm going up building shelters and shit. But I like to go up in,

in the woods and camp, and stuff like that. And I said, please, if you go there, find me a Japanese hatchet. Come over here, my friend. All right. So before I give it to, this one, I looked everywhere for this fucking thing for two weeks. If you got me like a lulls, if it says loles on it? This is what I'm, no, this is what I'm saying.

I went, like, the only ones I could find were from, like, Japanese lows. And I couldn't find anything. The last day I walked into a second-hand store, and you won't believe what the fuck I found. Shut the fuck up. I was walking around. Shut the fuck up. No way. There's a full box of just shit.

And here we go. Oh my God. And come over here. Oh. Oh my God. Oh, my God. So it needs to be like sharpened and reworked. Oh, my.

That's a real one. This is, oh my God. This was been used by an old Japanese man. Look at that. Oh, my God. You could see the, see that right there. That means, I have no idea. But it means something.

And it's a wooden sheath. Buddy, this, I've wanted one of these for so long. Look at that. Can you hold it without hurting yourself? I'm not going to hurt myself. I please. Oh, yeah. It's heavy.

It's a, isn't it? It's really heavy. Oh, my God. Isn't that, I mean. The last fucking day, I walk into a random store. This is exactly what I wanted. It's got to be sharpened and cleaned. I don't want to clean it.

I'm just going to sharpen it. I want, you're going to understand that somebody used this for probably a lifetime. And this is like, you know, you want to hold it? Sure. Yeah, go ahead and check it out. Bobby, I got to say, I think you talking about this axe was the most autistic. Thank you. What do you say?

I'm not autistic. But look at the detail. It's a spectrum. Am I the spectrum? It's just like how you're a little gay. You're a little autistic. Am I a little gay? Yeah, you're a little gay.

You think I'm gay? Yeah. Why does everybody say I'm gay? Everybody's a little gay. What a minute? Is he a little gay? Am I little gay? She laughed.

Everybody's a little gay. I'm apparently very gay. I said, I'm a little gay. I said, yeah, fuck it. Of course he's like. And anybody who's like under 25 is. Is gay. Yeah.

That's just part of being a Gen Z kid. I wish you told me I was a little gay back when I could have been a lot gay. and I wouldn't be married right now and then I'd be hanging out with you. It's a spectrum, everybody. Look at this. I can't tell you how awesome this is. The same way you're into bleeds.

Oh, my God. All right, well, we're going to do a little research on this during the Patreon edition. So if you want to find out the details, it might have been like a historic, like a Hokohua, hewah made this. You know what I mean?

Like a famous Japanese, Hatchet, man. This could be like worth money. It could. Yeah, it's probably not. But listen, the thing is, it could be. I'm very excited. All right, well, listen, guys,

we're going to patreon.com slash right now. I really did just bring this show down with my gift. All right. We'll see you guys next time on. You know what, dude?