Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - YKWD #656 | Jim Florentine, Drew Dunn, & Reggie Conquest

Episode Date: September 13, 2026

This week on YKWD Reggie takes a beating from Bobby, Jim, and Drew after they learn about his new hobby Get the EXTRA YKWD, Watch LIVE and UNEDITED AT https://www.patreon.com/robertkelly LIVE FROM THE SHED AND MORE ON PATREON DUDE!!! https://twitter.com/robertkelly https://twitter.com/YKWDpodcast http://instagram.com/ykwdudepodcast https://www.facebook.com/YkwdPodcast/Download Cash App Today: https://click.cash.app/ui6m/y0k6ofda #CashAppPod.Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. See terms and conditions at https://cash.app/legal/us/en-us/card-agreement. Direct Deposit, Overdraft Coverage and Discounts provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit http://cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures.Don’t sleep on @ultrapouches. New customers get 15% off with code DUDE at http://takeultra.com #UltraPouches #ad Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Yeah, baby. We're starting the podcast right now. We're back. You know what dude live. Welcome everybody to the show. YKWD. I started a social media podcast. The fact.

The YKWD podcast. YKWD is back again. Old school, back in the day, where it all started before fun and crazy. This isn't NPR. That's the original. What's up, everybody? It's Robert Kelly. We're back doing the YKWD podcast at the Comedy Cellar Studio.

Thanks for tuning in. If you're new here, please subscribe on YouTube. And if you're listening to the audio, hit that like and subscribe button on there too. And if you really want to be a superfan, go to patreon.com slash Robert Kelly. You get the asked questions in the show. You get to get the extra show every week

and be in the chat and fuck around in there. And it's a lot of fun. And you support the show by going to patreon.com slash Robert Kelly. But if not, you can get free. Just click that subscribe button. and don't be stingy with it. Also,

December 12th, I'm filming my special. My next special in Rhode Island at the fucking... What is it getting in? Uptown theater.

Because it had an old... It was an old theater. Corey from the Comedy Connection bought it, redid it, refurbished the whole thing. It's amazing. And now it's called the Uptown Theater.

You can get the tickets where, Danny? Punchup. Punchup. dot live slash Robert Kelly. You can get them right there and you're not going to get gouged. We got a bunch of different, someone was like, dude, dude, no, it's not. I didn't do that.

There's cheap seats, there's good seats and there's fucking fantastic seats. And there's a VIP thing if you want to get it. Hang at the after party. We have a little after party in the lobby. You get a T-shirt, a poster, all that stuff. Anyways, I want you to show up. So make sure you spread the word and get there December 12th, Rhode Island. We got a great show today.

I'm excited. One person is late. And when he shows up, you can figure out why. That's my stomach, fucking, my racist stomach rolling. Danny, who do we got? We have making his headlining debut at the Wilbur Theater on November 7th. Drew Dunn is in the house. Hey, what's up?

Fucking Boston boy. Yeah, fuck, yeah, dude. Headlining the fucking Wilburne. First fucking time, kid. Fucking, dude, is it sold out? No, there's a lot of fucking blue dots on that. Dude, the blue dots fucking hurt. Why the fuck would they invent that?

Yeah, just to make me check it. every day and go crazy every time I don't see another one sold. The blue dot. The blue dots suck. And with his new special Jersey Trash coming out September 18th, also the same day, volume 8 of terrorizing telemarketers, Jim Florentine is in the house. So you're releasing two specials on the same day? Yeah.

That's so Jersey of you. You only have to do press once. Smart. Why do it three months later? Smart run, yeah. Yeah, dude. Listen, dude, dude, you're Florentine. You can do whatever you want. no it's just it's easier that way and i film this thing at december i need time to come up with new

material and i still only have like 15 minutes yeah it's in nine months i know dude because we're old school we actually build material we live we live life have shit affect us we bring it on stage working for a few months get it going you know and then some it takes along but now everybody writes a fucking uh uh god damn fucking knock knock joke and they throw it on tic-tok and they're fucking out theaters. Do I sound like an old fucking doucheback? A little bit. I'm sorry.

You guys are doing great. It's fine. None of them are writing jokes. What do you mean? I think a lot of it's crowd work. That's the people that are jumping that fast. Speaking of crowdwork, dude, I, tonight I do the lounge. I run my hour over there.

And I went over there tonight. I go up to Danny before I'm going on. He's like, that's the best I've ever done. I said best I've ever done here. I know. That's the unfunny way. I did it the funny way. Fucking idiot. What are you? My aunt? No, I didn't say that. I said, actually. I said, I said here. No, but he was real. Dude, he was so, he was like, he literally was looking down.

Are they good? Dude, that's the best I've ever done. Oh my God. And I was like, what the fuck, dude? It's great. It's a fucking 80 seed or not full. It's the best thing that's ever Happened in my life. And wait, what did you say to him when he told you that? I just had a comment. You said something. No, he said, why did you not like them?

He said to me, I go, I said, you said about the crowd, crowd stuff. Yeah, I said, how's the crowd? And I said, I'm going to talk about it on the show. And Danny literally assumed, why did you not like them? Danny, if you had the best show ever, I just did Richard Pryor's live in concert, Eddie Murphy's Raw, and all of them. George Carlin's shows. No, they were fucking, here's the thing.

I go up on stage. We gotta, dude, we gotta get clips of this. It was all, I didn't get one joke. I got one joke I got to at the very end. I got, this guy, I always go up and fucking rat. I got to talk to you. I got a vibe with you. I got to know where you're at.

I kind of, the barometer of the room. Right. And then I, you know, I go, I'll do some stuff, crowdwork, but then I go into, I'll try to have something that comes out of it to go into my my joke, hopefully about that and then do a whole chunk. And then I'll, you know, so you don't know what my crowdwork is or what my jokes are. I like to do that, right? So I go into this, talking to this dude and he's just, you know, the mustache that everybody has now,

just fucking, I don't know if he's a serial killer or if he, you know, a duck hunter or a fucking a nerd, you know. Back of the day, you knew who everybody was by their tattoos. Yeah. If you had a sleeve, stay away. You know, but now if a guy has a sleeve and a ponytail and a fucking long beard, you got to look at the tattoos and make sure it's not of cupcakes and fucking, you know, twinkies.

Yeah. Usually it means he makes a mean cup of coffee now. Yeah. Dude, I know how to fucking get that brevet going. Yeah. But I just, this guy, just, sometimes the crowd doesn't. understand that they don't have to be honest. They can lie.

I'm not going to check it. I'm not going to investigate your answers. I'm going to just go with it. So if I ask you, you know, have you ever been with a woman? You can say, yes, and I'm not going to go forward. I'm going to go, cool. You know, that's cool. If we say no, and you're a man with a mustache in your fucking 30s,

I'm going to want to know a little more about you. And then when you say that you paid a stripper $20 to eat her pussy, when I say, have you ever gone down on a girl? Yes. When? I went down on a stripper. I want to know a little more about that. Of course.

And then when you say, when I say, is it at a strip club? And you say, no, a bachelor party. I want to know at what point were you first, will you last? I want to know a little more information about it. That costs more or less? Yeah. You get a little more. You get a little more slushy in there.

And then he winds up telling him. He's gay. He likes guys. He's been, he likes, he, the strip of pegged him. At the,

at the, at the, at the bachelor party. At the bachelor party, he got pegged. And I was like, how much is that? He's like,

100. I'm like, you don't have to be, you don't have to tell me this. Like, you can, you can just say, you know what I mean?

Like, you can say, yeah, You can just lie. You don't have to tell me you got pegged and the exact amount of costs. Who's dildo? I guess if you're a...

She probably brought a... I think it's a bring your own situation. She probably brings a bag of props. This is another question I would have loved to ask. It just opens up a preth... Of course. Could carrot top stripper showing up with the... A plethora...

I almost said prefora. Plethora of more things at my brain... Because we're up there as comics. You know, what you say to me, I'm in a second trying to figure this out. Because I'm around other comics all the time. You have to be very careful what you say. Right, right. Because they're going to attack you very fast, you know?

You're a fucking mean person. You're viciously mean. You're too very mean. We are. I am. You've said so, you're very, in a good way, in a funny way. He's fucking, he's a mean bastard. I guess so.

Yeah. But in a good way. Who's meaner? out of you two? You're very, but you're more, you've been around longer. Right. You know what I mean?

Like you've been around longer. And things that make you laugh are fucking vile. Yeah. You don't, you don't, Jim, you don't have empathy.

I don't have empathy. I know. He's saying that the other day, I was telling this girl, she's like, oh, you look good. I go, so you said last time I look fat,

I got to hurt my feelings. And he's yell, he doesn't have feelings. He just happened me out of day. He goes, he doesn't have feelings. I've never seen you feel. I've never seen you feel.

I've never. I need to feel. I don't know, dude. I don't know something. I've never seen you sad. I've never seen you mad. I've never seen you fully happy. Really?

With no emotion. Case closed. Case closed. I've been mad plenty of times. Me and Bobby have fought over the phone plenty of times. We fought? Yeah. What did we fought?

thought about. I remember when we first started doing the Creaser Kids tour. Yeah. I don't know. For some reason, it was a couple of issues. Like within the first... Boss? Yeah, probably. Within the first two weeks, we're on the phone screaming. I go, I had a girlfriend for eight years and we didn't fight this much. Right. We're two weeks into this. Can I say something?

We're fighting more. No, no, no. We were fighting because I was asking him questions if he cared or not, and he doesn't care. So we were... He was mad... You're still fighting about the same thing. He's mad at me that I'm asking him, what do you think about this t-shirt? I don't care. I don't. It doesn't matter.

It's good. It's good. It doesn't matter. When's the gig? How much am I getting paid? It doesn't matter. Yeah, I mean, it's like, you know. But I was just trying to include him in it because Voss would fucking lose his shit

because Voss had all kinds of ideas. We should get bumper stickers. Okay, dude, it's not 1978. People don't have bumpers. And no one's going to write, put crease with kids on the back of her bumper. Yeah, that's. Yeah, not with kids. Yeah.

It was a bad name. It was a bad name. I love the name. It was a great name, but it was a bad name to promote. Our shirts, you can't see some dad going to a park and with a shirt that says creeps with kids with four creeps on it, just going. It's crazy. Yeah, it was crazy.

And this was around the Me Too movement, too. So it was like 2019. Dude, we lucked out. We got out right before. Yeah, because the pandemic hit and everything got washed away. Everything got tightened up, yeah. I remember we were at a theater and we had 14 shows left. Yeah.

Wow. This tour was taking off so much. We did one show, and it fucking murdered, sold it out, and then they got us so many more. Yeah. I mean, we were kind of like these middle-aged rock stars at one point. It's great that I went away before the Epstein list came out. Nah, dude, I wouldn't mind getting fucking canceled.

That would have been. For that? Do you have any followers I'd have if I got fucking canceled? What you do with mustache is going, don't fucking love you, man. Dude. No, he's not. yes. Don't apologize.

And then the other creeps that are like, love is love. We stand with you guys. It was just a weird, like, Florentine is the simplest fucking dude ever. Where's the gig? Yep. Just show up. Show up.

Figure it the fuck out. You don't have to worry about him not being there. You don't have to worry about him. He's where he's supposed to be. Right. And then he leaves. He goes out of him out of here. And he's gone.

He's gone. But for most people, that's like the desired traits. For most human beings. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, yeah, show up on time. Be decent. Go away.

But you have a real problem with him. Don't cause any problems. Go do your job. Don't go over your time. You know, don't be a dick to everybody. And that's what I do. That's what you do. Yeah.

And then there was Voss. Right. Was on the show. I don't, I said headline. All right, you can headline. I don't want a headline. I'm not going up after you. Oh, shit.

All right. Well, you can go after Ron. I'm not going up after Ron. I'll host. All right, you can host. But I'm not a host. But you are, okay. All right, dude.

I don't know what the fuck to tell you, dude. Yeah, yeah. I don't know what the fuck. Just do what you want, I guess. Is that what you want? But do you want more of that energy and less of Jim's energy? Or do you want something in the middle, it seems like? It was just a juxtaposition for me.

Right. Because I was trying. It's like talking to a fucking flip flop or fucking talking to somebody who's just like, ha, ha, ha, ha. You're juggling an orange and an an envelope. Yeah, like, I wanted, I should have just known he's fine with everything. But it's Laurentine. I was like, well, we're thinking about doing this. I was just trying to run it by him, but he's like, fine.

It's fine. Yeah. Fine. We don't need to make a big deal of all that stuff. Right. I'm with you. Right? It's pretty simple.

Whatever you want. Yeah. But it's not because I was producing it. I was getting it together with Deb. We had to get the theaters. We had to get a writer. We had to get merch. We had to ship who's going to bring them.

There's a lot of the logo. There's a lot of things that I was, I built this show from the ground up at the village underground. Right. And now it's going to tour and it's doing well. Showtime was coming down to look at us for a TV show, maybe switch people out all the time. So you're feeling like you had the stress of all that.

You need to make sure the shows go off and you just wanted Jim to hear you. He would ask me, what do you want in the bottle of water? A bottle of water is fine. I love that I've become a gay marriage counselor. But that's it. That's all I need it. Like I don't need frigging, you know, organic meat or any.

It just flongs his water back. And Jim, when he asks you for more, how does that make you feel? Do you feel heard? Or do you feel like he's pushing you too hard? Let's, you know. Jim is a... We're over-complicating this.

Jim is one of the comics that I know is just a fucking actual man. Right. You know what I mean? Yeah. Most of the comics I know are drama-mamas. Yeah. I guess I'm a drama mama.

I'll put me in there. Yeah, with those glasses on, yeah. That's what I call my son. I told you he's mean. I told you he's a mean person. Yeah. You know, I'm divorced. Does this make me feel better?

I can't read. without it. Less drama. And I wanted to peacock a little bit. That's fine. Peacock all you want, but I'm going to say something. No, I'm taking them off. Now that's what you got until I have to read again. For all the parents out there with teenagers, we know you're already trying to keep a million different things under control. Cash app is here to help make sure your teens' money and their spending isn't adding to that craziness. It's never too early for your kids to start saving. Small steps today

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prepaid card, Sutton Debit Flex Card, and Bank Corp Debit Flex Card. Savings provided by Cash App, a Block Inc. brand. Visit Cash.app slash legal slash podcast for full disclosure. I tell my son, like, you know, because I got him half a week. My ex does. I said, you're in the gay. Well, I already told him that. He's at his girlfriends tonight, which I'm excited.

I go, this is the Com House. We call my house to Com House. There's no problems ever. There's no screaming, there's no doors slamming. So when you're mad at him, what do you do? He's a good kid. I rarely get mad at him. Okay, but when you do.

Listen. Nothing annoys me when a fucking dad goes, my kid doesn't do anything bad ever. Dude, you're wrong? He was trying to tell me about, I was telling him this girl's messing with him. You know, she's posted pictures some other dude. And I go, she's doing that on purpose to get to you. She knows that bothers you. Yeah, no, you don't know.

You don't know what you're talking about. I go, yeah, I don't know. I go, this the first girl you've had in your life. And I've been around a long time around women. I know, but you're right, and I'm wrong. You're a piece of shit, and you know. I know. I know what she's doing.

She's trying to get under her skin. She wants to create drama going, he wants to get him jealous. I go, that's what she's doing. No, you don't know what you talk about. Yeah, I know. I don't know what I'm talking about. You do.

Yeah. See, to me, I'd rather be yelled that than talk to like that. I'd rather be like, hey, listen, you fuck face. Yeah. I called my son of cock suckerer last week. Really? Yeah. Yeah.

I got so mad. I go, I was a car, it was a dickhead. I go, dude, stop being a dickhead. And he went,

what, do you just call me a dickhead? I was like, I shouldn't have called you that. It's just what we call, you know what I mean? When you're from boss? You do have a good kid,

though, because like, we were down at the table a couple weeks ago, and he was probably the first person ever in the history of time to ask for permission to curse while he was at that table.

He goes, Dad, can I say it? Shits and giggles. Yeah. He's a good kid. Well, no, let's not,

I shouldn't have to fuck. And he's 13. He's going, can I swear? It's like, that's funny. No, you know what? He's not supposed to, but he, look, what are you going to do? What are you going to do? I mean, yeah, I'm a yellow though.

I came from a fucking yelling family. Yeah. My mother, you know, Bobby! Right. Robert Patrick Kelly, get down here. Yeah. Stop being an asshole. You know, that's the family I came from.

I'm the same way. I'm one of seven kids, so it was just chaos. I'm one of seven, too. Yeah, yeah, messing up the names, fucking nonstop chaos all the time. Yeah, my mother called. Andro, Michael. Get your fucking ass in the kitchen now. Yeah.

That's what I came from. So I don't, I don't hit my kid, but I yell, you know what I'm? Plus I'm fucking, my guinea comes out. What the fuck you, fucking asshole. You know, I just, I feel like, my therapist tells me I'm wrong, but I feel like it helps him. Yeah. Well, it's better to be called a dickhead for the first time from your dad than to hear it from a stranger first. You got to hear everything at home first.

I shouldn't call him dickhead. That was just a slip up. Sure. Because we were hanging. Right, you got two casual. What did he do that you call, you remember? It's being a fucking dickhead. I don't know.

I was fucking being a dickhead. You know what I mean? How's the fuck? All right. I mean, I'm from the 80s. I don't know fucking, you're dickhead. You get called the dickhead. You know what I mean?

I don't know. But I did have to say sorry. I was like, listen, I shouldn't have called you that. I'm sorry. He said, yeah, don't call me that again. But he was kind of like, yeah, dude, don't do that. Yeah. As a third-year-old, that's not right.

You shouldn't be calling me a dickhead. Right. All right. Fucking missed the dickhead. You're being a dickhead again. Now you're being a cock-sunk. No, but we, I was doing the show and it's just, it's crazy to me that I love, I love when they fucking just go with it. I love that this guy was there tonight and just being honest.

But in my brain, I'm like, dude, you don't have to do any. Any of these questions I ask, you don't have to tell you. Yeah, you can vouch you. plead the fifth. Yeah. That's amazing that he admitted he got pegged for a hundred bucks. With the crowd going nuts when he said that.

Dude, it was nuts. Danny, it was fucking nuts. It was the best show I've ever had. Really? Wow. Better than Danny's? Is that?

13 times better. And there was these two smoking. There was a Hawaiian and a Filipino in the front of. Oh, yeah. And you're prime? You think you could have? In my prime?

Yeah. Do it now. They're downstairs waiting for it. Dude, if they don't mind me not taking my shirt off. That's how you cheat. It's like a fat guy in a pool. I'll put my glasses back on. Doesn't count.

Doesn't count if my shirts on. Well, yeah, I mean, look. Yeah, if they don't mind me fucking just making them come a bunch of times where they feel guilty. Right, right. All right. Well, suck you, Jake. Hold your stomach. up.

I don't know. No, I would be, they were fucking, I mean, this, this Hawaiian dude, she was, you know,

when you think of Hawaiians, right, you think of smoking hot Hawaii 5-0, you think of, you know, fucking the movie, Hawaiian, but when you go to Hawaii,

it mostly looks like fucking, you know, Danny or Stavros. Yeah, right. Just, just, hallah.

Yeah, the thick-nex Hawaiian. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, Yeah, they're fucking indigenous, you know. Right. You know, it's not the chick on the butter.

You know what I mean? Or whatever. It's not, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So why, she was the chick. She was that, you know, she was the one Captain Cook was like, I'll fucking pay you seven nails for her.

I'll give you seven nails for that one. That's double what we normally do. Yeah, King Camaya, Maya wife. You know what I mean? She was so pretty. And the Filipino, God, do I love a Filipino. And the little tiny boy nipples they have, even the girls, they have a little round. Glad you clarified for the girls, too.

I told the story, I go, you get a little tiny nipples, right? And her friend goes, she does. Really? Yeah. And then she goes, I go, you guys fool around? She goes, yeah. I go, but you like guys? She's like, yeah, we just flew around.

I was like, fucking, I just felt it go bump. Yeah, a little bonc, boncose, like, fuck. Give me fucking one night with you two. I swear to God, I'll, I'll, fucking, I'll be a machine. Machine, fucking, you really think you're going to last. I wouldn't last at all. I wouldn't, I wouldn't, dude, I know how to roll. Dude, first of all, I, I was a fast comer back in the day when in my prime.

Sure. Fuck yeah. Tough, yeah. You can't. I could never, if the chick was smoking, you got to let me do my stuff. Sure. I got to get you going. I got to make sure you are, I need you to feel, like I said, feel, I want, I needed a girl to go,

I fucking let me grip for that. You know what I mean? And then it would be over. I needed, I would always, because I had this one girl when I was in, I used to do, I don't want to give times because I'm married. I'm going to make sure the times, right. Yeah, you say one wrong year and you're done for it.

2008. Oh, wait. No, no. No, no. Rewine. 2013. No, my son. Okay.

It was before we're married when I was a piece of shit. and uh yeah the small was a remember the hard rock gig we did yeah there's this gig it was nuts it was jeff beecher was a fucking i don't he's just he's just this guy who's fat at the time he wore a tuxedo and he ran this show at night on saturday in Vegas okay but he flew you in on wednesday at the hard rock gave you a sweet until monday and he'd have all celebrities come down like Paris Hilton at the time and all those that whole crew Britney Spears

Britney Spears Quentin Tarantee celebrities come to show and all all hot girls smoking well because everyone once you know celebrities are there everyone else's showing us to be a part of it The hard rock at that time was the hottest casino

for hot chicks and young people in Vegas the pool at the rehab they called it Sundays was the hot spot so I mean dude I was hanging out with fucking the Osborne kids I mean it was

nuts. Yeah, wild. And we did the show and you only had to do 15 minutes. I mean, it was after a gay Russian 7 foot sword swaddler that used to go standing O every time. And they were like, give it up for Bob Kelly. You're like, yeah. But

you would do it, but after the after party was, it was fucking maniacal. I mean, it's insane. It's just maniacal. Like, I remember, I was with fucking, who's that chick that chick that was in America Pie? The blonde.

Oh, the blonde. Oh, I forget her name, but I know you're talking about. What was her name? Something T. Smoking hot blonde. Yeah. Sitting next to heroin in the fucking after party. We just in each other's ears.

Tara Reid. Tara Reid. Yeah. And her prime. Yeah. You were so funny. Thank you so much. You look great tonight.

Oh, shut up. No, I don't. You fucking. That shit. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. I'm not saying it was going to go down.

She might have probably, you know, if anybody more famous came, but I was right in her ear. I have it all the fucking, oh. And then Chuck Knoblock walked by and I went, Chuck Knoblock. Damn. And he's like, hey, what's up? And I was like, dude, I'm a fucking Red Sox fan, you piece of shit. And he was like, get the fuck.

When I'm talking for like 30 minutes, I look over, Tarrish gone. I fucking blew up with Chuck Knobloch. But you know, I'm fucking Boston. It was way better. Of course. But, yeah, it was crazy. But that night, there was another girl. I mean, fucking 12.

such, I mean, smoke abs, beautiful tits, perfect body, gorgeous face, smoking hot, and she was all over me and she was drunk though and I go, I don't know, I just left. I was like, I'll see you later. I got, I'll be right back and I left. I went back to my room. I was like, I'm out because it was a crazy weekend already. Yeah, yeah. Good for you.

Two in the morning. I opened the door. It's her. She hunted me down. How did she get your room? She fucking got her from Beecher. Ah. She hunted me.

She was like, I found you. She came in. I was like, I don't know if I got it. I just don't know if I got it. Probably already jerk off too. I didn't jerk off yet, but that's the problem. If I already jerked off, I would have been fine. But I was, you know, I mean, I was in bedtime mode.

I was like, you know, I was going to about to turn the TV on, maybe get a little snacky poo. Right. Put some crumbs in the bed. Yeah. I think I had a little sleeve of cookies or something. I was like, fucking all excited about. You're locked in on that. Pussy was so far from your mind.

Oh, so far. I was like, I don't know, there was a nice movie on. I think it was like some type of Slice Stallone film or something. And I had these little cookies. And I was like, hmm. And she came in and she was all over me. And I was just like, I was like, let me do some stuff. I want to do my thing.

Yeah, yeah. I want to do so. I want you to be like, this was a great night. But I'm not, if you put this in you, it's going to come out of your ears. It's over now. Yeah. I got to do some Tai Chi. And then she fucking, she just nod.

And she put it in, I was like, ah. I was like, slow down, slow down. I think she got two. Two, one. I'm just looking at her perfect everything. And she's like, boom. And I was like, oh. I remember going, I'm sorry.

When you last, when you only do two pumps, you should just keep going until it just gets soft. Don't make any noises so you can last like four and a half minutes. Right. It did. It got soft right away. And then you just go, hey, let's, let's take a little break. So I got a lot of my mind right now. Yeah, yeah.

I got some drinks. It got soft, so fast. And she kept starting. Oh, it did. Okay. She was like, I'll take care of that. And I was like, no, you're not. It's going to be a few minutes later.

I know you're hot, but I know me. We got a reboot protocol. We got to go through here. You're just going to be stuffing a water balloon in your pussy for the next 20 minutes. Yeah, it was bad. But anyway, how do we go on that fucking thing? It was crazy. That was crazy.

But these girls tonight, of course not. I love my wife. Oh, that's good to know. After 20 minutes. That's good. No, I do. I do. Yeah, of course.

You know, you can reminisce the old days. I'm finished. Yeah. If they were like, we want you to, we're big fans, the only way would happen, they'd have to be into this. And if you're into this, there's something around we have. Yeah.

No, if they were like, I want to, we want you to fucking blah, blah, blah, blah. It would be hard to be like, I can't. But I'd still want to go do my podcast. I'd be like, yeah, when I'm done.

Yeah. I would have waited. You would have waited for the podcast? Yeah. You would have bailed on the podcast. No, I would have waited until you were done. Yeah, fuck yeah. I would have waited.

Yeah, I'm here anyway. So one thing about comics that I love will never blow off a show for pussy. Yeah. Ever. If you're doing it. Right, Jim? Oh, no, never.

Okay. You do it afterwards. We have no emotions. I didn't know which way you were going with that. No, you don't afterwards. Well, usually you can't get pussy until after the show for most comments. Yeah. They need to see you do what you do first.

Of course. And then you become a train. Everything out of the way. If you go chasing pussy before, you're just fucking creep with kids. Yeah. I mean, there was a time where I got chicks. Yeah. Look, you're in the Hall of Fame.

Huh? You're in the Hall. What do you mean? In the Hall of Fame of Women. I mean, maybe you weren't a first ballot. I don't know. But I'd say he definitely. he definitely got in by the second or third year.

Oh, yeah. I was in first round. Maybe I, I wasn't around for all of it, but you're in, is what I'm saying. I was a yellow jacket, first round. People were mad when I got in. There he is. I'm just saying I might have been one sports writer that you might have pissed off that didn't vote for you. So he had to wait to this.

Come over here, stupid. What are you doing? What are you going to fucking watch us do a podcast, you asshole? What's up, man? I'm Reggie. Whatever, bro. Just sit out and put the headphones on, you late bastard. Where were you?

What? Where were you? I was doing a show, man. All right. You told me 907. 907. Danny, who's late? Reggie Conquest.

Bingo. You forgot my name? No, I know your name. No, you forgot my last name. Stupid. He does the fucking announcement of the show with the comics. Stop being paranoid. I don't know.

He was saying before. He's like, I can't remember Reggie's name. Dude, how do I... How do I forget Conquest? It's Conquest, right? No. What's up? What's up?

What's that? Keith said he coming up here. Well, we'll be done by the time he gets up here. Unless they got a fucking ice crane out the window. For 40 minutes on the clock. You can hear him for a half hour. We were talking about, we were talking about, we were talking about, chicks at shows, but you're single, right?

No, you're not. No, no, no. You got a girl. Yeah. I forgot, you sew now. I knew this was coming. Can you, wait, can you finish what you was saying? I just want, I just want him to hear it.

I don't know if you heard it. Jim, you can call me gay. Nope. I just want to hear him say. Reggie, he's one of his, is it a hobby? Or a side career? It's just a hobby, bro. Is it going to be a side career?

Well, you know what I did? I sold something, and then I started posting my dates. underneath on Instagram. Yeah? And it worked. I mean, people were, it's like all these fat chicks that sew and they're following me and they're like, I should have called them fat.

Can we cut that out? No, we can't. You fat sower? Yeah, the sewing communities, a lot of fat people. So it was like they've been hitting me up. What did they buy? What did you show that they bought? Nothing.

They're not buying it. I'm not there yet where I'm selling anything. I'm just sowing shit on Instagram and posting dates. and their comments are saying I like the way your comments like they're like I don't know what happened I don't know how it works

I don't know how comedy works They're like you put a stand-up clip up And then they go I like you stand-up No no that's new Apparently the new thing to do is put your hobby up No no I mean it's no more rules You can put anything up

It's true Fucking rules me and Jim have rules Well yeah y'all came up With a time where it was rules And our generation There's no more fucking rules It's over And I blame your generation

We gave you all the tools you need not to be a fucking clear sewer. Y'all stop being, y'all stop being mean. Y'all stop. We're being old and nice. We never stop being needed. No, no, no. Listen. You never stop. Y'all never stop. But you let the generation

ahead of you kind of calm it down a little bit. I'll tell you something. We gave you all the tools you fucking losers needed. And you know what you did? You know what you did? You picked up a sewing needle in a table. No, no, no, no. No, no. Because, I mean, it's too funny motherfuckers right. Drew funny as shit. Funny as shit. Yeah, so it's

Yeah, doesn't sew. He don't sew, but he do some gay shit on the low. What do you do? I don't sew. He don't sew. What do you do on the low? On the low? I mean, I don't post.

I just play video games, hang with my kid. That's basically my life right now. What's gay about that? I thought he did something. You just made it up? Golf is probably the gay thing I do. Does your kid need anything sewed? Actually, I was coming.

I was hoping you'd be here. Why don't you make him a binkie? Actually, you've wonsies. Actually, that's what I will do. Because when I learned how to actually make shit, that's a nice thing to do. Can I just say something too, dude? You fucking shouldn't post anything until you learn it.

No, that's the thing, because we live in this time now where people like to see. Stop saying this time. Like, I don't know what fucking time we live in. Bobby. Stop saying that time changed. Okay. Men have not changed. No, no, no.

Men have changed. We got a little soft that we have because it's not as hard. You guys came up when you're getting $5 a spot. What the fuck does that have to do it anymore? I mean, it's just, at times it's changed. But anyway, people like seeing you learn shit. So the start of it, people, I'm telling you this. They want to think that they could learn it.

They never will. They're going to sit there and keep scrolling on their room. They go, oh, wow, it is easy to learn. I'm going to give you this. I'm going to, no, it's all right. I apologize. I want to give you this. Okay.

But why couldn't, like, why couldn't you pick, I don't know? I play video games too. Why don't you do fishing? I do that. That's cool, but we live in New York. It's not a lot of places you can fish. There's a fucking river on either size of the city. It's an island.

It's a, it's a lot. It's surrounded by water. It's so far from where I live at. It's literally surrounded by what. It's not even a peninsula. I don't have a kid, but I play a lot of video games also. That's cool. What video games?

Madden Live, 2K, Call of Duty, all the games. What are you playing? Yeah, NHL for me. Same shit. What you do, Jim? Jim, you don't do nothing like a little game? No, I was thinking, well, I was thinking because I like do my lawn and shit, do all those landscape itself.

I did a thing about putting mulch down. Oh, yeah. Could I go crazy? No more blue dots on the Am I doing it? That was going crazy. Rich Voss already did it. Oh, that's right.

He did this whole thing. He's ahead of the game. He's ahead of the game. His landscaping with Voss. I'm putting bushes in today. And then it just shows the bushes up. He doesn't show you doing it. Is he really doing that?

He quit. He quit. Some dude off camera that's going to come in. I put the bushes. Now he's talking about the fucking Israel. Do you know the Jews made fucking light? The Jews invented sewing. Did you do you?

know that? We gotta get it back to mowing lawns. Look at it, dude, I'm just saying I'm just saying when I know you for a while. Yeah. And I know you're a mean, vicious

I'm not, hang on. I mean this is a compliment. You're a mean vicious. Oh, here it is right here. I'll play this real quick. Season four. Season four. Say words like that. This is a landscaper's dream.

Tons and tons of stuff. I'm buying some more trees, some bushes. I mean, I'm loading up. I am loading up for season four in our new house. I'm going to pick the stuff up, and you're going to be with me step by step as we put everything in. And you'll see the transition at my new house. Call it episode.

There you have it. So look, this is a good. going to be a good season. This is it. I got to go. That's, you know, that's where I'd rather show. That's good. I'd rather kill myself. If he had different shots, like different camera angles, that might go, you know. Production, quick shot of the bushes he's going to put in. Yeah, you go. Before and after cut back. Different angles. If sewing goes for you. Oh, man. If sewing is the thing that pops you off on the fucking thing and you're on some.

morning show and hey no I don't want to be on a morning show and you have like a little fashion show with all your little baby outfit you made and Drew sitting there with this kid as long as I can still say what favorite words what's your favorite word

I mean you can say that because people will be saying it to you what's they say it to you it's your word we raised him right yeah yeah So like if you did like Fallon he would say hey I hear you got an interesting hobby Oh yeah that's what I'm planning so you would probably talk about that Yeah I'm sewing I got a let's do a little I'm Fallon

Hey what's up man hey what's up father Hey it's good to have you man what a great set So I heard you have an interesting hobby yeah man I started sewing back in the summer Yeah what a fucking clear you are Jesus Christ I'm sorry did I say that on fucking I didn't know to say that But that's some gay shit right guys Want to look badass while you're getting your neutropics and your adaptogens? Ultra pouches are the best lip pouches in the game.

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After you purchase, they're going to ask you, where you heard about them. Support the show and tell them why KWD sent you. Oh my God. Listen, you're not having fun. It's relaxing. It is relaxing.

It's not fun. It's therapeutic. It's fun when you make something. You haven't made anything. I have. What did you make? I made a pin cushion. I made a bag.

Oh, stop. Stop, stop. Wait, wait. You made a what? I made a pin cushion for the pen. Buddy, anybody in the fucking. world can make a pin cushion. You sound like, no, they can.

Yeah, you do. Dude, you get cloth, you sew it together in a fucking pattern, and then you fucking stick pins in it. You sound like you don't know shit about sewing. Thank God. That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me. Yeah, let me ask you this. What stitch would you even start with? Oh, there I go.

Look at me. That's the pants. You start with a cross hitch. That's the pants that I'm, uh. Okay. You make it. Maybe you could do it. Look at those comments, man.

I don't even get that much comments when I do stand-up. Can I just say something? If you, as fat as you are right now, we're a collar. pants, I will laugh my fucking face off. No, no, no, they're practice pants. They're just, they're just. Please wear those pants. Is that girl coming in calling you a fucking sissy?

No, no, no, she's helping me. You ain't never getting in my pants. Go to another video, man. Oh, there you are. Cutting out your pattern. Yeah, baby. You got a singer, you get your own singer, huh? Yeah, I got a brother machine.

You got a what? It's called a brother. A brother. Is it a black machine? Yeah, it's the black sewing machine. Yo, brother. Yo, man, we got a singer. So I was doing voiceover and yeah, that's the pants that I started. I'm finishing them up.

And then I'm going to start posting the shit that I said, don't put the volume on. Oh, you hit your finger. Yeah, I did. I fucked my finger up. Okay, let me ask you a question because I know that people sew. And you showed me that a month ago. No, it wasn't. Yeah, it was a month ago.

It was not a month ago. Look at me. Look at me. It was two weeks ago. Okay, two weeks. You haven't finished pants in two weeks? You know how hard this shit? I'm learning, Bobby.

I'm telling you in the video, I'm learning. Learning. Learning from who? YouTube. And I, yeah. Who's teaching you on YouTube? What's his name? His name is, uh, fucking... Gertrude?

No, uh, fuck. Something glorious. His name's Bondi. He's a 13-year-old boy in Bangladesh. Yeah. Next a hundred pairs of pants and day. So this is how Bobby even found this out. I was having a genuine conversation with him.

And I asked him like, hey, man, what do you do outside of comedy or something like that? Or did you ever quit? and he went on the rambling and I was like I was rambling I was rambling I was monologing and I liked a monologue and I asked him and then I just told him my soul

not thinking that he would turn on me immediately slept up yeah I did how yeah but it was a genuine he was the nicest he ever been that day he was trying to get information yeah and then and I needed the

I needed the Wi-Fi for the for the VU because I was going to show him and then he he found out that I didn't need whatever he didn't give me the Wi-Fi But he was so nice that day And then I fell into it I shared with him And now I'm on here talking to him

And you're teasing me We were at the comedy cell at table I'm with him He's from Philly Yeah I only know him as a Trying to be a mean person No

I'm trying to be mean Funny funny mean Not in a bad way I take that He's a vicious One of those All those Philly guys He came

Yeah He's a fucking He's a fucking Heath robins and protege I mean just a fucking piece of shit Yeah In a good way I mean that in a compliment

You're a fucking hunk of shit And that's how I know you And we're at the table And this guy I expect him, Lev, all these guys When they're at the table I'll walk over once in a while And I see these new people

Yeah, so anyway, it's the other one. And oh my God, is that? And I'll walk over and go, you guys suck. Whatever the fuck you talk about It's the most boring fucking Horshit comment And I guarantee none of you Will listen to each other.

I'll do that. Every once in, I'll come back in and inject a And he's there and I expect more out of him And then he breaks out with that. Well. And he set me up. He goes, you do other stuff. stuff. I was like, yeah, dude, I fly fish, manly. I shoot guns, manly. I hang out with my son,

manly. You, but we were being nice for the first time. It was the first real conversation I had with Bobby, and he turned on me immediately. If I didn't turn on you, and we had a conversation about sewing and the interest of your sewing, and I was really interested in it, would you have respect for me? Look at me. What? If I was like, well, that's interesting, man. Bob, you know when I first moved here, Bobby Kelly gave me a pocket pussy. That's my, First year in New York. I'm a man. I've already.

You know what you did with that? You put it inside your body. You started sewing. He sewed it into a pair of pants. I can wear it all the time. You're the first person to give me a pocket pussy when I moved here. This studio changed so much. Now this studio, you're going to talk about someone.

This is a gay-ass studio now you got. It's studio used to be cool. Why is it gay? Because you used to have memorabilia up and all this shit. It was like the thing. Atrece's hats right there. This is from first gangbeth. That's Alan the Monkeys.

That's a first. Changed a lot. You mean, how, but you said it's not. Whatever. How you doing, Drew? Oh, my God, you were fucking faking. You were bluffing. When?

You were bluffing there. No, wasn't. Yeah, you were. You're trying to get out of this sewing conversation. I am a little bit. So, Bobby, what would you do if your wife, you go on to your wife and said, listen, I'm thinking about taking up sewing as a hobby? My wife doesn't like when I get sick.

She thinks I'm a pussy. She doesn't like, my wife doesn't like weak men. If I get sick, she's like, come on, dear with it. Really? If I said, I was thinking about getting a. singer. Bobby. She would be like, yeah, you could think about

fucking leaving this house because I'm going to fuck a plumber. I'm going to fuck a man with a fucking interesting man hobby. Bobby, can you text her right now, say you're taking up sewing, see what she says? She's going to support him because he's secretly gay at home by itself with his wife.

First of all. Why you got to scroll that low for your wife? Do you all text? Because I'm married, dude. I don't fucking talk to that broad. All right, you ready? Let's see. I guarantee. Let me just call her. Let me call her.

Just say, Hey, I know, I know how to do this. I've been, I've been doing a comedy for a while. Fucking asshole. You fucking,

give me tips on a fucking crosshatch. Dawn. Yes. Hey, Mom, I'm on my podcast live with some boys here. I was thinking about taking up sewing.

How would you feel about that? What are you going to be sewing? I don't know. I was going to learn how to do like maybe pants and, you know, shirts and get in like a sewing machine and learning how to sew. How would you feel about that? Would you be okay with that? Sure. You can sew me up some new outfits. Really? Would that, you'd be fine with that? Yeah. And then I'll take knitting.

And I'll make some of my... I love you. Goodbye. I love you so much. You fucking Boston Broad. I love you. Bye. You fucking. She knew it was coming. What do you think I married a fucking asshole? She would dump me in five minutes. If I was like, ow, she'd be like, yeah, I'm out.

Wait, wait, would your lady do the same? No, she would support me. Yeah, because we're in two different generations here. The generations have changed. It definitely, you're absolutely right, dude. The generations have changed. You can do. You do mad shit.

No, dude, that's what scares me. I look at these videos of Chinese kids getting hit with sticks and boards. You look at the military, the Russian military is doing push-ups in the snow with no shirts. And then you see fucking our generation just... Ooh, fuck. It's just a hobby. Well, I mean, Voss is into his lawn, so it's the same thing. I think I could be wrong.

lawns are more manly than sewing. Yeah, that's like a man's job to do lawn. Can I be honest? I'd rather get a pillow. You'd rather get a pillow. If he made me a pillow, like a, I don't know, YKWD pillow.

So you could think about every time you sleep on it. Yeah, I'd think about what a fucking wussy is. That'll make you sleep. I'd put it on the arch of my back when I jerk off. Why don't you do that? Why don't you come up with a back? A jerking archback pillow. Yeah, the lumbar support.

A pillow you put under your stomachs and when you present your assholes of other guys. I'm going to keep doing this, and I can't wait. Buddy, it's going to, it's something. I hope it blows up for you. I really do. Listen, I really do. Bobby, I'm still doing a comedy.

I'm still a comic, baby. Come on, baby. I ain't leaving stand up. I'm just doing a hobby, baby. When you call me, baby, it has a different meaning. before it was like black kind of pimpy and it was cool now it's like baby come on baby i feel like your girlfriend when you call it now like you're trying to hit on me baby you like you like a pillow baby but no yo tell me it's gonna be it's gonna be good i ain't gonna stop man i'm gonna make a whole

fucking fit watch god i wish keith was here i wish he could have he is coming he Keith does he knows know about he he must know because he sees it right he he yeah he hates it of course he because he cares about it again it would be be shocking if he loved it. I know. He'd lose respect. I think that's right. God damn it. I like my pillow. He made me a left, he made me a right on pillow.

Hold my arm up. So I left Luke fucking retarded on a plane. When he found out, he called me him and Marina over the phone and they called me gay for 45 minutes. They did? Yeah. I mean, look, if you take

sewing in high school as one of the those classes, like the cooking, I think the hate I'm getting is making me do it more. Yeah, I get that. Yeah, it's like, And I'm only getting it from y'all. Like, everybody else has been like, oh. Who? Huh?

Who's been like, oh. I'm just saying. I'm getting internet brain from the comments. Yeah. They're hyper-neutral. The fat women he was talking about. Can I read him? You edit that out for him.

Can I read some of his comments? I'd love to read these happy horseshy. It's all supportive shit. You want to be supported. What? What? You, we all want to be supported. Look, I get the fact that you like to read a comment that's supporting.

I understand. No, no, no. Here's the thing. It's something new. You've never. deleted any of the comments? On the someone videos? Yeah. Yeah, like some guy calling you gay or

fag or anything like that. No, because nobody's done that. They called me gay and that underneath. That's all in the DMs. You're about to, by the way. After this episode comes out, I want you all every last one of you. No. No, don't you. Come on to my

comments. Oh, fuck. No, no, I don't want nobody listening. Listen to me. I'm saying this really. Do not go into his comments and make fun of his sower. Don't do it. I know it. You think it's funny.

Right. And we're all going to laugh. And everybody's going to fucking think it's hilarious like me. No. Laurentine, Drew, Keith, Norton, Voss, Colin. I mean, every comic I know is going to be like, but don't do it. Look, it's a supportive thing. I had to block some family members because they would stand up here.

Your father? God damn pussy. No, no. No, no. My dad was very supportive because my dad. Dad sold in the military or the arm for the airman. Yeah, he sewed people's legs up from wounds. He's not making pincushion just sissy.

My dad was actually supportive, and I learned something about him, too. Dad doesn't like you. He does now. Yeah, because he has a daughter. He has a daughter he's always wanted. I wonder what he said as soon as he hung the phone up after he told him. You know what he said. God damn kids.

He's a sissy. You got brothers? Yeah, I got brother. What'd your brother say? I didn't talk to him about it. You know, I don't talk to my brother. He's 10 years older than me. Oh, really?

He does his own shit. Do you talk to him at all? What he said? What he said? What? What he said? What? He said with him?

Yeah. Has he seen the videos? You think so? Really? I don't think so. He's in his own world. My brother's a former addict, so he's in his own world. Oh, okay.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But he's sober. I got five sisters, though. They love it. Of course they love it. You know? Why they love it? Yeah, I know.

Because they have vaginas. They love it. They're supportive. My younger sister wants to help me with the graphic design and all this shit. Really? Yeah. So you want to start a sewing business on the side? No, man, it's a fucking hobby, man.

What if it takes off, though? Then I got to think about that. I ain't thought about that. Yeah, what if it takes off? What if that's... I literally just started... I posted a clip today and I posted my dates underneath. That was my first time doing that.

It's selling us merch. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Once I learn how to make a hat or something small, I'll settle on his merch. You're going to make your own merch. That'll be fired. Look, you're thinking of... Yeah, but then you can sell one pair of pants and just charge $1,000. You don't have to bring a whole thing of...

You can set your own price. He's an artist now. I want to look at him. Yes. I want to see... Do you think his fans have $1,000 to buy a pair of pants? Maybe if all of them group up together. Anything's possible.

They're not going to fit in it. Sisterhood of the traveling pants. They can share it once a month and share their stuff. Sorry. You gotta back me up against these guys. I think this is a good idea for you, dude. Do you think it's his way of meeting women? It's going to be all women in the comments.

No, I think it's his way of transitioning into a woman. Showing a sensitive side. It is a lot of women in the comments. Yeah. So maybe that's the angle. Do you have a girlfriend? Yeah. Okay, does she like it?

She loves it. She loves it. She loves it. I'm not in the house bitching about comedy. I'm just doing. And I'm enjoying. Comedy, like, more, like, I don't give a fuck. It's like, oh, I give a fuck, but it's taking my brain off the...

Well, a crowd can't hurt you when the people that love you call you a gay bitch. Yeah. How could a crowd ever hurt your feeling? Does she get mad if you're so in too much, like not paying attention to her, you know, a part of your hobby? No. You know, you're in a couple hours. You're trying to put that pants like that. Somebody go hoist keys up into the window, please.

Just get him up here, dude. Yeah, he's coming. She was... He's not coming. He's coming. He said he was. was. She got more...

He's on the eighth stare right now. She got more... Keith also told me he was going to make it in the business. She... My girl would get more annoyed about me bitching about stand-up. Yeah. Now that I'm like, you know, sitting there playing the game, sewing, doing whatever. Yeah.

Paying more attention to her. You say that you said that you're not around playing video games and being an asshole. Do you have a sewing spot? In my building is the second floor. It's like a lounge. And it's for sewing? It's for whoever. Some people throw parties down there.

It's a creative space. Is that what you guys call it? I guess you can call it though. It's a TV that can, people in fridge, throw people throw parties down there. So you bring the machine down there? I bring my machine down there.

I got it during the day by myself on the weekends. It's done because people are in there doing whatever they do. Right. But during the day, I'm just in there by myself, sewing right. Oh, so you're sewing right? Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

It's helped me do that shit more. I'll take a break from sewing and I'm writing. I'm listening to my set. What is it writing? I'm straight, right? Over and over. I do not like talk. I'm straight.

No, I get that, though, because you're forcing yourself to sit down and do something. So now you're halfway to doing the writing anyway. Absolutely. Drew does not get it. No, I get that it forces you to write more. The hardest part about writing is starting to do it. Don't get macho now. Yeah, dudes on the same team.

So you'd sell? No. Why? No, because I don't got the fingers for it. What? Mine are all calloused up. No, no, no. No, no, you know what.

He's back on my side, stupid. You know, it made me start doing it. I was just angry. I was just getting angry. Yeah. I was just. Dude, I'm so sorry, Reggie. Reggie, listen, man.

Listen to, no, no, dude, I'm trying. I know. I'm trying. I was just... You know, it's like these old guys when they get older, they start painting. Just to get their mind off shit. Yeah. All these guys start doing it.

I'm just there a little earlier. So he's just doing it in another way. So, Bobby, I was getting very angry at shit that is out of my control. And then, you know what the title of it was? What? It's called So What? So what? What's the title of what?

My sewing series. You have a series, a sewing series. on season four. That's literally one series Voss could never have it's sowing it's selling stories

season it has to get a new iPhone every fucking episode that's what it started out of anger So what? So what?

So what? Like I was kind of like fuck this shit I was angry and I was like I was like I'm just I posted the first video straight out of anger

like fuck this shit fuck the algorithm fuck the internet fuck comedy right now now and that's how I started. Fuck my manhood. Fuck all things my father taught me. That's literally how I felt when I posted it.

Now I like it. That's great. Right. Yeah. And it's got the most, nope. It's got the most views of anything. Of it what?

Like, is it really blown up to where it's... No, it's not blowing up, but it's doing pretty good. It's like, oh shit. Are you afraid? Because I know your stand-up.

And I'm going to say this. I saw you perform a few weeks ago. I was at the Village Underground. Oh, wow. And a comic one up. two comics went up or three comics went up they were good

everybody was killing you know but it's um but then he went up and there's just something different when he went up because he's just I'm black no wasn't that what wasn't that was you were being

you were being you like he's he just went up and was for me personally I like when I don't feel like like somebody's telling me jokes right I like when I'm just watching somebody talk to me and it's funny you know what I mean

and he yeah he is I think everybody is you know but he really, he fucking was murdering and his jokes were coming. I just, I was like, ah, shit, he's, that's fucking funny. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah.

That was fucking great. So, what was you about to ask before all that shit? Ugh, that was gay. I'm gonna talk about sewing. All that complimenting? Buddy, I'm gonna, we might have to get the sewing machine up here. You're getting a little angry. Calm up down, get the brother machine.

Somebody get a fucking machine up here, staff. We need thread! Wait, what was you about to say, though? You're worried about, I was worried about what? You said all. but you started off saying, you're worried about his crowd, his audience knowing that he sews.

I'm worried about seeing your stand-up. You're creating a community that knows you from, I can't believe what I'm saying. Sowing, sorry about that. My fucking stomach hates you sewing. So you're creating this positive community of sowers.

My stomach is going nuts. And then they're going to come and, oh, he does stand-up, and then can see you, and you're a piece of shit on stage. You know what I mean? Like your comedy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I get it. And they're going to be like, oh, my God.

Yeah. Yeah, well, I mean, he just said something about my fat pussy. I haven't really. Waiting for the pincushion jokes. Yeah. I haven't really. Oh, yes, a little. I haven't thought of that.

Well, that's one thing you're creating. Was that a pro? Is that something I should? I don't know. Well, when you look out in a bunch of tubbies with fucking scarfs on and they're waiting for you to be nice and you come out and go, I am nice though. I fuck that bitch

and they're gonna be like, huh? That's not so what? Uh, right? Well, that's why I talk in the videos though. I'm saying, I'm talking shit. I'm cursing. I'm fucking. W.B.

It's nice. Uh, yeah, I guess I see what you're saying. I don't know. So what I'm saying is maybe you should have a little edge to you sewing. How do you do that? I don't know. I sew a fucking, uh, sew a pair of pants that you can undo the pussy and get in there quicker and be like this

so you can get in there and finger fuck a bitch, nice. Oh, okay. I'll keep that. Something like that. I think that. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. I didn't think about the crowds.

Yeah, I just put an asshole flap on these pants. When I posted my dates today after I post a clip, I said, come to the show and make me a hat. What did you say? I'm just trying to promote my different ways to promote. So I posted, I did a sewing clip. Jim, where are you going to be? I'm ending this fucking podcast because I don't. Yeah.

I'm going to fucking end. I don't even know what to do. Jim's got a special coming out when? Yeah, September 18. Jersey trash on Amazon Prime and terrorizing telemarketers volume 8 September 18. Make sure you check it out. Telemarketing things fucking nuts. Fucking hilarious.

I can't wait to see the special. Make sure you get that and go to what's your website? Jim Florentine.com. Jim Florentine.com. I love it. You still have an old school website. Is that punch up too or is that just what? No, it's not just regular.

Oh, it's fucking great. You're going to be all over the place. Make sure you go check them out. I can't see it because I have my glasses on. You oldish. I got to put my sewing glasses on. I'll go Vinny's comedy works. Oh, there's Keith.

Oh, shit. Keith's coming up. So if you want to fucking be here for this pounding he's about to get, go to patreon.com slash Robert Kelly because that's where we're going. Very shortly, you're not done yet, kid. I'm chilling. I'm chilling.

I ain't going to. I can't wait for Keith to come out. Drew's got to leave, but we got questions for you. All right. Listen, Drew, what do you got? Drew Duncomedy.com. Doing the Wilburth for the first time, November 7th. Pack it out, people.

Boston, show up. Very excited for that. What is it? November 7th. November 7th. Saturday, November 7th. Saturday, November 7th. Make sure you pack it out. Yeah, I got Vancouver,

hyenas and Fort Worth, a bunch of other stuff. Drewdoncomedy. Check out the YouTube. Fucking hilarious. And you're opening for Louie, too, on Sundays now, right? On Sundays, yeah.

Perfect. You want to come see him open up on Louis, the pussycat on Sundays? Drew's there. What do you got, Reg besides fucking swollen thumbs? I don't even, don't have a, I'm not good. What are you working on?

What outfit? With outfit? I'll be in the seller. I'll be at a flyout fest in November. October, I'll be at the Comedy Seller Vegas. All right. Make sure you go check out. Yeah, I don't have a website.

My shit is all over the place. Hobby Lobby, picking up supplies. Yeah, getting some fabric. Yeah. Make sure you go to Robert Kelly, Punchup.com. Live slash Robert Kelly. And my special, make sure you go check it out. It's at Punchup.

Punch Up. What is it? Punchup live? Punchup. Punchup.com.com. Live slash Robert Kelly. I'm just thinking about him knitting. Punchup.com. Love slash Robert Kelly. Sorry. Sorry, sewing. December 12th. I'm going to Saratoga this weekend. Port Charlotte. I'm going down there all over the place. Make sure you check it out. Danny, what do you got? See me in Philly at Claude's Comedy Club on September 10th. And then I'm also headlining in Syracuse, New York, October 3rd. Joe, what do you got? Go to Jokes Russell on Instagram. Give me a follow. Thanks.

Cody, what do you got? Follow me on Instagram at Cody the comic, and you can see me open up for Bobby in Port Charlotte on October 2nd and 3rd. That's going to be fun, man. Do you guys, any of you guys sew? No. I know somebody that listens to it.

Oh, shit. Is it a comic? Are you going to out somebody on the show? No, my sister does listen to the show. We're on a Patreon.com slash Robert Kelly. And if you want to see, we're going to ask these questions real quick to everybody. and Keith's going to be on.

So go there and sign up. And I think it's five bucks a month. That's about it. And we'll see you guys next time on. You know what, dude?