Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Zang Tics and Toenails

Episode Date: August 27, 2012

Matt Kleinschmidt and Chris Elles from Laughbutton join Robert, Dan, Kelly and Joe List. RiotCast.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hoy es un día de eso de no saber cómo va a acabar el día. Donde nadie pregunta a dónde viene, sino por qué no te viene. Y una ronda es el tiempo que pasa entre no conocernos, y no creer olvidarnos. Hoy es un día de eso que Madrid nos vía. Hoy es un día de eso que Madrid nos encuentra. Maú, la vida es más vida cuando nos encontramos. Encuentra los bares de Madrid la dicción especial de Madrid nos liga. Un duvena que de Maú, a Madrid. You're listening to Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude on the Riotcast Network Riotcast.com

Hey everybody it's Monster Voice from Shut Up Lewis shut up Lewis September 6th through the ninth Bobby Kelly is gonna be at side splitters Tampa good strip clubs. That's what I've heard This is what I've heard and then West Nyak at levity live the 13th 14th and 15th. I'm gonna be there open it for Bobby So you should come get a little double dip Shut up Lewis and then he's gonna be at the laughout loud comedy club in San Antonio, Texas, starting September 20th through the 23rd. So go see Bobby Kelly live and listen to the,

you know what, did podcast on riotcast.com. Hey gang, this is Colin Quinn. This is Jim Norton. This is Dennis Lerie. This is Opie from a lot of things. This is Jim Norton. This is Dennis Leroy. This is Opie from a lot of things. This is Bert Kreiser. Staying cookin' you are listening to Robert Kelly's, you know what dude?

You know what dude? I know what dude! But this is Robert Kelly's, you know what dude? You know what dude? I'm stuck in the stinking stinking stinking stinking You know what I need I'm stuck in the stinking stinking stinking I'm stuck in the water, I'm stuck in the water You know what I need

I'm stuck in the water, I'm stuck in the water What did that say? What's your name? What's your name? What's your name? What's your name? What's your name? What's your name? What's your name? What's your name?

What's your name? What's your name? What's your name? What's your name? What's your name? It should start in the middle anyway. I don't know why it started on it. It should always start with Kelly Just because she's a woman And women ain't funny Cuz laugh button live wrote that now I'm joking. I'm Funny Robert I'm kidding. You're very funny

You don't have to say that we should do a whole show or just act like stupid zoo. Yeah, you're very funny. Looking. Ah! Wanko, wanko, wanko. You got to be really big in the waist. Ah! Oh! Oh!

Oh! Oh! Oh! Boing. You could only, your mother so small, I can only suck baby dicks. No! No!

No, just say that. I'm sorry. Is that bend down, buddy? Too far. Wait. Can I suck baby dicks? No. You can't, you can't suck. I, uh, can I suck baby dicks? No. You can't, you can't suck. I, uh, can I suck baby dicks? No.

You can't suck. You can't suck. I, uh, can I suck baby dicks? No. You can't, you can't suck. I, uh, can I suck baby dicks? No. You can't, you can't suck.

I, uh, can I suck baby dicks? No. I, uh, can I suck baby dicks? No. I, uh, can I suck baby dicks? No. I, uh, can I suck baby dicks? No. I, uh, can I suck baby nickname to the fucking wars literally the coolest nickname you can Fucking bad teeth Tyler Norco called your tiny mouth

Love it if I got monster boys. He got a tiny mouth. All right now. Let's now I was a topic of his mouth real quick when I was editing that video Yes, I'm probably sinking the audio because I couldn't see his mouth You're like fucking auto and George Well, I want to welcome two of my favorite people in the world My world is very small there's only eight there's only eight people in my world. And Dan, you're one of them. Kelly, you're three of them.

It sounded like a fetcher, but I don't know what it meant. She put it on a little bit of white. No, she did not shut up. She is beautiful. I told today she was actually leaning over to put the coax in and her boot. She was covering her tit from popping out and I go, go look you wear that shirt. I get to see the tit It's a flops out. Those are the fucking rules of the game honey Look it here's a deal mom's to running a restaurant. There's a deal Danny rules into restaurant

You kids come out. I run a restaurant Technically I'm doing you shift those are my tits. Get pops out. Fuck you pay me doing you shift those my tits. Hit pops out, fuck you, pay me. Yeah. What's your tip? Well, it's like when a girl wears a sundress with no panties on. She's a whore. What a girl.

They are down here all the time. Really? And the skirt comes up. Yeah, we used to stand in front of the Boston because anytime they open the fire, there used to be a fire department over there. Anytime they open the door, the wind would just come out and fucking kind of swoop up

These girl skirts all the time. Chicks would have no panties on you see a hot box hot box Oh, it's great seeing fucking box through the ass crack. You can see the little bump the little bump lips I like that anyways, let's introduce. I'm gonna fart hang on Yep, I'm gonna explain that, hang on. Yep, there we go. Careful. I'm going to explain that. There's a reason why I did that. I did that. I did that to save lives. Okay, I'm here to save lives.

First of all, I'm back. Let me. Yeah, he's back. Is it? Sorry, is it? I was like, let your back. We have, I have a phone call coming in tonight too. Let me just make sure on Twitter. I'm back, let your back. We have, I have a phone call coming in tonight too. Let me just make sure on Twitter.

I'm back, which I have been. You guys did the podcast without me. Dan, good. Talk about last week. It was, it was an enthralling experience. We had the bird face rob sprants running the ship. It's just, you know what? I thought that was going to be me again.

No, you're tiny mouth. You're tiny mouth, you're on out. Tiny mouth, tiny mouth was all weird. We are not fucking changing tiny mouth. I will never come back. Kelly kept trying to bring up the fact that she had a two year anniversary that no one gave a shit about.

I heard. He's so sad. Did I heard the show? First of all, it was brilliant without me, but it really made me sad. Just to hear, try to constantly bring it It's my anniversary Don't have anyone eyes for everything to use guys no one gives a phone and then Joe brings up

Yeah, dude, I haven't I haven't had a cigarette in a day So going and no one knew who the fuck I was that really made me happy she I felt so bad for Kelly You really just blew her off? You know, what are we supposed to do? Who gives a shit? Going and no one knew who the fuck I was. That really made me happy. I felt so bad for Kelly. You really just blew her off. You know, fucking savages. What are we supposed to do? Who gives this shit? I don't know.

She's here every week making sure the place is nice. And I thank her for that. I don't give a shit that she's been in this country two years. Two years she's been taking work away from Americans. I don't know. I don't know about that. Yeah, it's what they didn't want. I'm trying to find someone's calling it. Keep going, Dan. Take the show over. I ran it yesterday. I am't know. I don't know about that. Yeah, it's what they didn't want. I'm trying to find someone's calling it keep going Dan

Take the show over. I ran yesterday. I am for tea yesterday. Yes. Well last week It was longer than that. It's two weeks ago. You did a good job, Dan. Thank you Kelly And I'm sorry I blew off your anniversary that no one did about the fuck, dude That's not how you say sorry Kelly. I'm sorry that I did not Appreciate the fact that no one gives a shit Thanks, Dan I fucking hate your sayings Fucking hey a poke in the back

Licking the fucking qualabers belly And then Look me out Anyways, let's let's go through let me let me introduce I usually do it piecemeal. I got a phone call coming in First of all, we're not gonna do this whole talk and over people shit that you guys did last week. You guys were very fucking yappy and you're a big culprit of it. You don't listen through your fucking headphones. I want you to turn those up

and I want you to pay attention. Yeah. The fuck was that Olympic shit? It was. Oh. All right, you fucking want yourself, big boy. I know you're the star of the show. I won.

Yeah. But you make sure that other of the show. Oh. Yeah, but you key. You make sure that other people could talk. Except for Kelly. You talk over her anytime you want. Thank you. No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. We got the boys from laugh, bud.

That reminds me, Bobby. That reminds me, Bobby. Fuck. I'm going to be known as tiny mouth. I'm going to have to fucking. I don't know. I didn't know. That was perfect. It was the one. Tell the children. That was comedic kind of.

Yeah. We love you, Jack. We got the boys from Aldon. Oh, fuck me. Laugh button. Laugh button. Laugh button. Laugh button is here. Hi, Chris Matt. Hey, you guys are here. Hi.

Hey, you know, we promote you guys if you... I mean, first applause in this One of the I don't we call you the unofficial sponsor of the show You guys we love you guys you guys really love comedy the syndicate and laugh button you guys are really behind Creative people People who need to be exposed you guys are the shit you guys are the ones who help us put on our first show, our live show that Dan wasn't at, unfortunately. So you guys are here and you guys, there's a bunch of shit we're gonna get to

tonight, but... Where did you aim? It's the fucking soda. I'm gonna... So anyways, you guys here, I'm glad you're here, excited to see you guys. Chris, your face is still in, just a little angelic face look at you I want to bite your bottom lip. I do I just want to suck on it I want to suck on your bottom lip and then I want to take your nose on a broomstick

He's got a witch nose, but he's got a sexy bottom lip. He's a little twink cat him Look at his little beard Look at his little beard Look at his little beard Refer to us a twink every time you see him. Oh, he is he is And you're just a big old bear But anyways, we got Joe the truth. Yeah Baby mouth list Talk about time and I still got

And we got we got Dan soda AKA fucking Voice And then we got Kelly for stuka AKA fucking fun tits again. I can't wait I'm gonna I tell you what she fucking punch my wife in the face and raped her one night. Oh, no. Why?

Rape's not funny. Rape? Not that kind of rape. Oh, the funny cop. Yeah, the fun rape. You know, where I hold her down is tickler. I just want to apologize for the YKWD podcast for that joke. That's what everyone's doing now when you make a joke, you have to apologize.

Oh, really? I'm not going to do it. really yeah come on when you have a win on that popular you know yeah it's not you know you got a we're not fucking burrs podcast not that many people listening we have a lot of people but not that many um so we have a lot of shit to get to you tonight one first of all I was away last week I was uh there we go filming a pilot. Yeah. Hollywood. Hollywood. Hollywood. Well, it was you guys don't know because I take the four train to Hollywood.

It's actually it's actually the G-Drain. The four train. What is that? Well, it's a Brock. It's his Brock. He's right. Yeah, but there's no studios in the Bronx well, I didn't know they're all in Brooklyn industry industry speaking actually Filming locations happen not in the act exactly I've perved four times already Do you know piss somebody is right now going dude with the fuck with the barbed-up and I hate when he drinks Here's the old you guys didn't know for like three weeks Here's the deal. You guys didn't know for like three weeks, I was going through fucking torture with this

because I found out about it. Almost a month, I found about the script, I read it, I fucking loved it. It's a half-hour comedy written by Dean Laurie, arrest the development of my wife and kids. It was being directed by Scott Ellis, Weeds, and 30 Rock, produced by Apostle, fucking rescue me, the job, blah blah blah, someone and so forth. And I had

to fucking, I had to, that's it. I had to audition for it. You want a role. I had to fucking get, I mean, it was crazy. The shit I had to go through for this. I had audition for it once twice then writer then director Pass pass pass and then network test and Wait and then get passed by them just the poop in front of a focus group Dude it was fucking so stressful the whole because at any point somebody could have said no fuck him and a couple I know I tried it in the calls. I love the podcast. Some people are just not shaking.

I know I hated that. I hated that corningness of it, but it was really good. Like you did it perfectly. But there was actually some names too. I mean, I can't, I don't want to tell you who, but there was some. All Giamani. No. Kevin Spacey. No, no, what's

like a fat ball, guys, like guys who look like me. Kevin James, the guy who played Kojak, he is bald, Michael Trickless. No, not that big. But there was some people that were, you know, actor, actor guys. And then I got it. And then when I got it, it was a whole fucking another story. Maybe some guests on the show made sure that those actors didn't make it into the audition. Really? To say it. Joe bite their fucking Achilles.

No, no, no, no, no. Took one little fucking rat bite out of it. Sorry. Peter, Joe, I'm sorry. I'm sorry about that. I apologize. Joe, hey. Joe, I'm sorry about that. I apologize. Joe, if we were all animals, you'd be a cute mouse that would cook for all of us. I wish that the boil. So anyways, the show fucking Bronx warrants crazy.

We did it, we filmed it in five days mostly in four days God free is one of the guys He was kind of in the process too when he booked it. It was kind of crazy The first day if do we shot it all in Brooklyn it was fucking The there was the first time in my life if you ever read in a call sheet When you do a show there's you know one two three four, you know your your number one in a call sheet, when you do a show, there's one, two, three, four, you're number one on a call sheet, you're kind of the guy. And then number two, and it was the first time in my life I've been number one on a call sheet.

And it was fucking crazy though, but like it was no, we had dressing room to the ship, but we filmed the apostles so bad ass, they fucking 10 to 12 pages a day we were fucking You didn't have time to sit down rest you filmed eight and then filmed and then you're done for the day It was fucking nuts, but it was one of the funniest things I've ever been a part of I mean people crying Like I've done shows. I've I've done it. I've seen comedy, I've done all the people fucking crying laughing at some of the shit. And to get people to laugh on the 15th take, people don't know that you know, you know, it's

not like a three camera shoot, sitcom where it's like a play, you kind of go through the scene and then you're right and you go through, there's no laugh track, people don't have to laugh. And then you kind of film it sometimes from the middle of it or the egg, and then to get people to laugh, it's really hard, but this fucking Dean Laurie is so fucking funny, but he also lets you fuck off and come up with ideas.

And Scott Ellis is fucking, whoa, I learned so much this week, but we did some of the funniest shit ever. This show is fucking off the chain. Like, I'm talking fucked up funny. Like, you're gonna be like, I couldn't believe we were doing it. Like, some of the shit we were saying, I was like,

oh, are you sure I can say this? Are you sure, like, I can do this? And then there was some of the stuff I was like, you can't do that. Like, don't do that. And we can't do that. This is a studio audience? No, dude, it's a half hour show. It's like, you can't do that. Like, don't do that. No, we can't do that. This is a studio audience? No, dude, it's a half hour show.

It's like, shot like rescue me. Oh, that's what I thought. Yeah, it's, well, the pilots for FX. The first day was a little sketchy, though, man. The first guy, cos, man, there was some, there was some fucking, you know, fucked up takes, where I was like, you know, caught, fuck, dude, try it. And, oh, we just had to get your feet under you.

Yeah, but dude, let me tell you something, people have been fired, you know what I mean? You know, a table reads for Christ's sex. I mean, I know guys who have been fired at table reads walked off the set by literally got the gig was at the table and then they fucking, it's security comes in, okay, you have to leave. What? And then they walk them up, walk up so fucking literally dude this is money if you don't if

you're fucking off they'll fucking they'll still kill you in that episode they'll be a writer that goes to shoot him shoot him by this next scene some guy waiting in the corner with a pen above paper like I'll do it here's the thing in the opposite way though I did one where I was supposed to get shot in the first episode. The producer and the writer liked me so much. They fucking just made me get injured and they left me in. The thing never got picked up because it was garbage. But it was from one and done.

It was, yeah, you can, but it was fucking brilliant. So now it's in fucking editor's hands. Hopefully in a few weeks You know we'll find out some fucking grass man. Yeah It was it was the best thing I've ever done ever fucking done the actors were fucking amazing like fucking crazy good hilarious every single thing and Apostle said it's one of the best things they've ever done Yeah, so and they're they're not optimists at all. They're not, they're not, those guys are like, fucking now it stinks.

And we'll say, you know what I mean, that they're not guys who are like, they were like, dude, this is fucking good. You know what I'm, which is like, you'd never get that out of them. So that's done all the way back to this, now on to fucking, I, but on the thing I lost my voice. So I've been on Pregnazone, okay. And around six months ago I went to

the Hampshire and I got fucked up. I found a tick on me, okay. Hang on. Hang on with the fucking sound of eggs. Let's try this again. I just look pregnant. I found a tick on me. Let's try this again. I thought it'd take on me. No, not cut, fired. Can I be the guy that shoots Kelly? The stink of the tail. The fucking truth is back. No more baby mouth. Don't do. That he earns it again.

Talks second, just open his mouth, a tablespoon. Oh, shit. So anyways, yeah, I wound up, yesterday, I mean, I literally was sitting on set like, I'm wearing, I used to pray, and this is going to sound fucking corny, I know. I used to visualize and pray that I would have a show in New York, a cop show in New York, where I get to be, I got to eat donuts in the scenes. Like my whole, the whole thing is me being too fat. You know what I mean? Yeah. And wanting to get my wife pregnant, right? I got to wear the badge, the chain badge. That's pretty awesome. You know what I mean? They had, they were trying to put it on my belt, but they

wouldn't be able to see it. So they, I swear to God, they were like, man, we really can't see it. So, but you're gonna see it in the, it's four cops. And the three, it's God-free, who is a fucking adonis. Yeah, it's Jack. Dude, this motherfucker on film is no joke. He's pumpin' nickel black. Like, he's fucking fucking like fucking African. Like we picked up the fact. The godfrey is dark. But gorgeous man, gorgeous. And then fucking the girl is fucking Spanish,

smoke and the kid, the other kid is Spanish and they're all fucking gorgeous. And then there's me, which I think is hilarious. If you see the poster I put out, the little photo we took, it's just good looking and tic. And so, what about the tic? Okay, so now we're going to the tic. See, I'm teaching you how to be a good fucking host, then. But I'm an idiot, so I'm just like, talk about the two. He wants you to get to the Pregnant Zone.

Good. Good. I want you to have that bandana. I want you to take it because you deserve it, but just know that I did like that. Because it was so corny and your fucking stupid fucking, you fucking 1920s face. I have a Pregnant Zone, see?

Yeah, I got that. Oh have a pregnant child, see? Yeah, that's what you're doing. Oh god damn it Chris. There you go, for you, single knot. Okay, here we go. So, I, I wound up taking this, I lost my voice and I had to take these steroids. I had to take all this fucked up shit for the last couple of weeks.

And this stuff that I took fucking kills you. Like it's bad for you like it stops It's what the fuck are you laughing at funny me dying away I missed I missed how dysfunctional the fucking people that come on the show off. Especially the regulars. You just, this the dysfunctional person, Joe. I concur. One of my favorite words.

I can be on something for the drugs myself. All right, you go ahead, keep going. So fucking head's gonna explode. If you don't talk about a check in the next 30 seconds. I wanna know where it's going. I wanna know where it's going. I wanna know where it's going. I want to know where it's going. I want to know where it's going. I want to know where the Ticks come in from. I want to know what love is. I mean, dude, we're doing country. I want you to do. We're doing country rock. Yeah, you can do it. I was doing fucking good music. No were doing fucking ballads, okay?

We're at the beginning of our career when we're rocking yeah, we're still doing the chain link fence covered stage Yeah, we didn't have our fucking manager come up dude. You need to do a ballot. We need a number one We need a third single. Yeah We want to know what love was The money runs out Leave Fictitious we're doing like a fictitious I'm lost we're doing some weird music show the tick So the tick I'm back to the pregnant

Taking steroids A baby I don't know. I'm taking steroids. Fuck me. All right, so here's your favorite baby. Um, I don't like how you just listen to my pilot story. There's no question. You guys are just listening like I came to school one day to teach you what a pilot is. Joe Liste is losing interest. So here's a deal. Robert, tell us what you do. Losing interest So here's a deal Robert tell us what you do so So we

Okay, I was so happy to come and talk about it you guys wanted you're literally wanting me a speed ball through that Your tips I'm kidding so here's a deal. What are you doing? Shut your tits I'm kidding. So here's a deal. What are you doing? Dude, what is the god both he is? You fucking standing over and looking at her tits. No you work. All right Kelly fucking no more of these shirts, okay? You're gonna wear White and I don't want you wearing shirts anymore on the show you show the boys your tits Listen, I told you when I put on white that my tits get bigger and that's what's happening. I'm telling you, I mean, I don't want you wearing shirts anymore on the show. You show the boys your tits. Listen, I told you when I put on white, my tits get bigger and nothing's happening.

So happy. I want to fucking. What? Nothing. Listen, so here's it. You still do nothing for me because of your asshole. All right. So anyways, I got very sick. I got fucked up this weekend and I literally lost blurry vision in one eye. My right eye, I usually wake up and I look at the clock on the cable box in the room to, you know, you've been in my room both of you guys. And that's how I tell when you wake up. When I wake up, I couldn't

see it. I'm literally looking and it's all blurry. So you're like an old dog, my one eye. Is this fucking going? No, I'm not like a fucking old dog. I'm saying that home hoping that it's the shit. But anyways, around three months ago, in April or wherever the fuck it was, I had a tick on it. I went to the hamster fly fishing. I found a couple ticks. You know, I found one that brushed it off. I found another one that brushed it off, but I'm in the woods.

Anyways, a week later, I come home, I get the flu-like symptoms, and then my neck is fucking stiff. That's usually in the first trimester. I'm so glad that you're wearing that fucking lower, buddy first trimester I like that you wear that I actually like the joke too but if he didn't I didn't like that he looked down at his fucking phone yeah he's he's he got his secure about it his fucking confidence fell out he went he'd be he's still learning I listen so Listen, so how do you good, mate? Thank you. You have As long as no no high fives Who is your round buddy you wear the bandana?

That's normally mine, but you can have it I'm gonna keep it. I'm gonna keep it. I'm gonna get some cans that she's got some Kelly just told the president the president of fucking the syndicate to go fuck himself Put the evidence in the car junior, but I put the goddamn evidence in the car Five y'all I shouldn't look at hanging I don't like your confidence. She really look how she's sitting I just I run hair now. Oh, the fucking Joe and Jetpants that used to fit. Listen. So I got, I, I, I went to the doctors today because I've been falling apart.

Okay. I don't know if you guys know about my dead toenails. Yeah. Let's just save that. Let's save that. Let's talk about that. I'm so happy. That's your funny.

My dead toenails moving on. So anyways, I, I, I man. It's so funny. I'm so happy. My dad's 10 else moving on. So anyways, I go in today and I got checked out. I'm going to check out for everything. For long. Well, because I'm withdrawing off the Pregna zone, it's fucking nuts. It's like coming off a heroin. This steroid I've been taking for my voice

to get through the last couple of weeks. And then now my eye is fucked up and and then I don't know I don't know I don't know what you know I don't know I'm really a thing I me. I'm a hyperconjure every search line Where's the deal is that I don't know if when it happened Like you would have felt it or yeah, but I'm really I really don't notice things like that a big fucking Yeah, I don't want to lie. I literally try not to look below my neck He said on your mic

I was at the park on the kettle fat Jesus Christ Hang on can you untie that and hand it over to this fucking Wow, it's going what I still solid it to you I'm so full a bunch of weird joe. You know so You know so mean about me and I heard and I made her say I made her take that fucking bandana I am so anyways there you go.'ve fucking it's been a crazy couple weeks you guys filled in for me which was one of the funniest podcast ever that's coming that came out last week

uh... the last is on fire yeah i was i'm sure that i'm sure that you i felt bad for you you're a little sad there was a two-week in a year two year anniversary welcome to the country honey and you and you got me you got me I'm gonna open it The show just stopped for some reason I don't know what the fuck that was The show stopped Kelly got me a gift that's editing on the show The show just stop where were we kind of Kelly got me a gift. Okay. Thank you. What is this for?

Thank you. Thank you Kelly. That's very nice. That is very nice. Kelly, thank you. Text me. Let me do it. It's really silly. It's really silly. It's really silly. It's a little elephant. It brings good luck when you have a picture of an elephant. It's a trunks up. And the trunks up. So it brings good luck. That's really nice to Kelly You know, it's really nice that she didn't fucking let Joe and I know she's gonna do that

You know why she says you brought the apple to the teacher you fucking talk. Let's go with your trunk up You know the fucking elephant at me Those you at home Bobby threw something at me. I thought it was the elephant. I was like that was me Jesus Who's going to hell? Jesus. That's really sweet. That was really sweet of you, Kelly. I would get you guys something individual. I'm not going to get anything in my story. I really, honestly appreciate that. That is very sweet of you to actually know how much it meant to me last week to actually have the pretty much the show.

My dreams happen and actually be part of it and fought for it and won it and filmed it. I'm going to be a part of it. know how much it meant to me last week to actually have the pretty much to show my dreams happen and actually be part of it and fought for it and won it and filmed it and it was beautiful when it was a and you actually give a shit about me I appreciate that. That means a lot to me. That means a lot to me. I got you. Jonah, I got something. What is that? Let's pass that over Kelly. Oh my god. These are cute tips. But they're not there's not all the cute tips I forgot I got you not all the cute tips to hear

Try not to you know what I meant to get you to you see that when I went to Australia when I went to Ireland Right Guinness I brought you back a some Guinness a little little bubble of Guinness from the Guinness factory I don't I don't think I've been to the Guinness factory and actually give them out for factory. I don't, I don't, I don't drink and I'm drunk. But that's also celebrating your sobriety. I actually gave me a Trojan. I did the condom in Qtips back actually. I'm pretty broke to be honest. Okay.

Can I have one Qtip? Yeah, I can take a Qtip. I can take one. That's right. I'm really, actually. I don't take a Qtip. Thank you very much. I appreciate it.

Here's your Qtips back. And I can have a little bit of a little bit of a actually. Alright, I'll take a Q-tip. Thank you very much. I appreciate it. Here's your Q-tips back, and I can have this, do you need this? Yeah, absolutely. Hey, thank you.

You've had a beer before, right? I've been sober for 20 years. That's celebrating a sobriety for 20 years. I think I'm just like a chip. Thank you. That's good. Yeah, I can, and if I fucking lose my mind, because I get limed as he's all fucking know that open

and suck it out and go on a fucking binge. Nice dry Irish Guinness. Can I have the bandanda please? I'll give it to myself on the old side, did a sound effect and I think I deserve it. He's a little animal lector there. Good, you hear. So anyways, we're here and you guys, you guys, let's talk about more important things.

Let's talk about where you guys were. Okay. You all four of you were at Montreal together. You guys, you're kind of being Kelly up by saying all four of you. Yeah, but because she wasn't. I know, but you didn't say all four. You could say four of the five of you. This is to get to your gift.

It means the fuck did you give fucking nice? Well, I mean just say it doesn't mean all four and it is five people in the room. I said four you went to Montreal. You said all four of you don't like all of us. Yeah, all four are you men? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Joe? Yes? Dan. Dan? Hi, Dan. I Joe yes

Dan Dan You guys you guys You guys that fucking tick is killing you I don't know that man dude. Do a foot. The fuck don't say that I can be happening I can't fucking see out of my right eye right now two weeks like rath I'm here. Oh, yeah, right nice talking to you. Um, hey, good to see you. How you doing, kid? Well, here's a deal. Um, you guys went to Montreal.

You went as, uh, small faces. No! Hey! That was a good one. Great back! They just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they, they just, they just, they just, they, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they just, they smaller Mike Well Demo is called the list I mean The truth just keep saying everyone's back

Someone makes a joke No, don't pick on Kelly come on she shows up here looking delicious. She does look delicious Don't don't pick on Kelly. We are all talking All four so we We We think on Bobby not you you guys went to Montreal and you guys went to Montreal as as a laugh button life Just laugh button. It's not laugh button life. That one live is just when we do a live event.

Yeah, well, yeah, we're live. We're live. All right, it's good. We'll go with it. No, I'm kidding. There's going to be some truck driver going, this isn't live, is it? I thought I downloaded this.

Brooklyn truck driver. Dude, all truck drivers that I do are from Brooklyn. The middle of the country. Methodically. Let's slow things down. That's pretty, that's pretty, that's pretty, that's pretty, Kelly? Yo.

You have a ton of photoshoot. I'll take your photos. Oh. It's like when you are this. What happened? Ziggin' someone who's unaware they just got Zung is really the fuck top. Zung! Zung!

That fucked his Zung! That's Zung is really the fuck Top zung Fuck this song Zung I think it's zinc I think it's zinc me what do you think? Zung What a Boy I got a nervous tick so anyways Stop saying fucking tick I might have fucking line disease you Cocks I got play tick tech. So let's play tick tech dead toenails I'll take the bandana or I'll take that might have been the best joke for the time

I don't have no idea where that joke registers. I think you're actually funnier on water So anyways you guys went up there and the funny thing is we went up last year That's what we kind of bonded became friends and drove home with you guys. Yep, and not you Who said yep? Oh I'm telling you yes. Oh, I thought it was him I'm aware I didn't drive to Montreal last year What am I afraid? I don't blame you because if you said it you wouldn't see his mouth Jesus Christ

We're getting sung by guys that have never sung you before that I don't know what a song I don't like sung at all fuck off. I love song quick try to high five Kelly Man, I'm getting kicked off Oh man, I'm getting ticked off. Dude. You know, that should have been a choice on fly, Chad. Like it, Roman Coke? No Lime's disease? Ah!

Joe's on fire! Joe's on fire! Joe's on fire! Joe's on fire! Joe, you finally go on! Oh, I love him. Joe goes on fire, and he peed them up, two cogs That's his excitement thing Too tiny hooks All right, so anyways you guys went up there and you took a photo you took a life-size cutout Carpool cutout of me up to Montreal. We had a spot save for you

But you were filming I was filming two weeks ago. Let's call the pilot. It was a pilot. Do you want to tell us about the pilot? Well, what it is is it was I Took me so long to get this pilot and it was amazing Because I beat out certain people for it Who did you know I was on Not give it trickless. No, not my take less. No, no, but anyways I was number one on the ball sheet I don't know if you know what that means, but we were

It's godfrey on that show you godfrey is gorgeous gorgeous like Dr. the light you fucking look at son Corporate and in all like that. He's the opposite of a flashlight Robert. Could they have you back? Don't like this territory Okay, he yeah, so you guys took a photo of me last last year And you actually made a cardboard cut because you couldn't make it this year Hey, cuz you guys are so sweet you took because I couldn't make it to my love fucking Montreal I love it. I don't give a fuck. I know it was just people better. Fuck me never pick me. Fuck off. When they do, you'll have a blast.

It's awesome. I missed it this year. You guys took me up there in spirit. That's right. Yeah. And you took me all over Montreal though. We did. You guys were posting these fucking. They didn't take it as super sex. So here we go. All right, so I'm gonna go through this We'll send you the pictures to post yeah, so we you took me to a dog walking I went dog walking apparently well those if there and then we were We were having a conversation. Yes, you and I yeah, we were just sitting out by a car just a little break was that yeah We're waiting for we're waiting for our third person as part of the ride. Oh, let's go. But we are she talking about right here. We were talking about physics Are you sure?

Okay, and then and then we have me With Ellis. Yeah, yeah, we just had a park talking about giving each other hand jobs That looks nice. Yeah, we're talking about how geese turn us on. And you needed some words of wisdom. I just helping you out there. Yeah, and I love that story you told me about the footprints in the sand. They don't always last. Only in your mind. There's Javu Jackvon there he is from Comedy Central Records. Superstar. Do you know him, Dan? Yes, I do. Madam at Southwest, lovely gentleman. Great guy. Do you know him? I do do met him itself by south west lovely gentlemen great guy do you know him i do not he runs comedy center records if you one day get an hour and record it

he might actually i have an album on a different record label what's that i wrote anyways we we he has look at greatest hair is right there check on in person looks like person looks like he's sick, but in on photos, God damn he looks good. Just that nice, sickly, composing. I thought Joe's gonna make a tick reference.

He looks great, so that's me taking my Jack Von, and then here I am with the boys right here. Yeah, that looks pretty handsome right now. Yeah, he looks great. My head looks huge. Yeah, you got a big fucking head and no calves. None. No, you look like someone healed me in a tent

and I just started walking. You're just fucking, like I just, the Lord, let me fight out of my wheelchair. Yeah, you guys look like they made you for spare part bodies. Okay. Okay. I kind of see where you're going.

Yeah, like your forearms are a smaller guy a little Italian man Yeah, your calves are from a lesbian swimming champ So this is where we film the the unofficial 10 minute tell people about this. You know what dude podcasts That was it. Yeah, we grabbed Joe we grabbed Dan And then we said let's let's go do it with fake Robert. Yep, and we performed and you guys did how long is it? We got it down a little so we got this video. I watch it. It was actually very funny Yep, and it's Joe and Dan sit down with me the fake Robert fake Robert outside at Montreal the hotel That's right and you do an impromptu. Yeah podcast right on spot Joe and I very hung over very hungover

Just on the roof and here's another photo of you guys I like it. I like it. We're gonna hang that one up. Okay, and then Put it on the fridge. We have Joe about to either spit on me or kiss me his mouth is so small. We don't know what it is Joe was the first to have his way with you. Yeah, would you do it? I blew you? Yeah, he did you really did Again, but not at it like the real time. That's me in bed with Chris. Yeah, we're watching the Olympics Yeah, well, I remember that that was good. I can actually see what fake rubber You know that right I saw what he saw of course as there's a camera in his his eyes Well, you stayed in my hotel room, so you saw some things I did I saw you fucking rating a double dogs box

This devil dogs a great. Here's the thing that right there that photos creepy I actually retweeted that one and people were like, dude, what the fuck is that? It looks like it goes from three men in a baby. Yeah! It's exactly what it's like over there. It's like a reference, yeah. And then you have me at the Pepsi machine.

Get them in nice snack. Yep, get them in nice snack. I actually got a sprite. And then there's me back at the same spot. That's funny. That's really funny. Yeah. We just happened to stop at the same spot.

That's fucking very they put me literally where they got the photo people was gonna like what the fuck is that? What it was awkward. It was awkward, but the stories was going around Your buddy Ryan Hamilton emailed the PR people it just for laughs He heard that there was a Fake Robert Kelly going around wanted to get a photo shoot with you We just we couldn't end up meeting up while we were there. Yeah, there was a few robber Kelly going around wanted to get a photo shoot with you. We just couldn't end up meeting up while we were there. Yeah, there was a few people that were looking for you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's great. That was fucking awesome.

It was really funny. I had a blast in Montreal and I was filming a pilot. Yeah, that's right. I was doing both. Hey. That Mike's on. Go ahead. That Mike's on.

Don't fucking come up and not say nothing. Hi, Robert. that michael go ahead that michael that don't fucking come up and not say nothing i have a rarber that's no the uh... the owner of the company sell the uh... man who uh... let us have the studio appear that you know what to studio you even photoshopped the weight of the of the of the dummy i mean like of the thing the dummy you're just going to be able to talk to you smaller than you but thinner what you photoshopped

that picture. They did it. Oh, it's last year. Oh, it's last year. Oh, it's last year. Oh, it's last year. Oh, it's last year. Oh, it's last year. Oh, it's last year. Oh, it's last year. But he got those, those ghetto earpieces. They're called headphones. No, no, no, what are the ghetto earpieces? That earpieces are something. Well, the beats by Dre, that's our, I don't think it was you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You got the beats by Dre, exactly. So that was the fear. I'm about to take one of your oods and smash it over your head.

Okay. All right, I gotta go. All right, what are you going? Number two, number one. I know, I got you saying the bedroom. What? What are you getting the bedroom? That's weird.

I want to know what happened to your chinails. What? She wants to stay on that. No, seriously though. I'm stuck on that. I'm a fool what happened to your chinails She wants Seriously though Yeah, we yeah, I I'll tell you what happened you want to know what happened You know those fucking I'll tell you you know those Asian pedicure places. Yeah, okay You know they don't wash that fucking water and they don't wash those tubs And they don't have a one and they don't fucking watch the fucking fingernails. They don't watch the tub

So they yeah, she I got a fungus on one toe. Oh like three years ago little tiny fucking fungi Yeah, and then it spread And then it touched the other toe okay, it went to the other toenail Okay, and now the toenail is a fucking like dying. Okay. Can you do it? Are you yellow?

Yeah. Yeah, I have those. Total. I have gross feet. You go fucking fungi. And if you don't take care of it, your toes will fall the fuck off. What? My toenail.

Your toenail. What? I love you fucking. I got come in my mouth. You guys, you guys see when I said totally? You guys just get in here. I You guys you guys you guys you want to sit totally Assuming it that was just a bunch of lots of Great audience

Allie You guys audience members. I'm trying to come up with the truth from all the tiny mouth jokes. Well, there's still tiny mouth. There's still time. I'm just trying to make sure that tiny mouth catches on more than a truth. The truth is dead to me now. I want to make sure, I want to make sure tiny mouth takes over. I think you need to fuck Joe. Teach him a lesson.

What do you think, Joe? I should be teaching her the lessons. Yeah, why do you teach me? Hey, what the fuck? I'll teach her how to get her piece. That's the lesson I can do. Hey, my don't have herpes right now. Yeah, but I don't want to edit it. Hey, no, no, not the curtains great. Everything's great, but you know what? What? Kelly took her pants up. Kelly, but it sure why? Stop juggling your boobs Kelly where

Yeah, that'd be fucking terrible it would be like a half a studio you cut everybody off Yeah Yeah, but that thing is Talking to the microphone the curtain would be like, no, it would be fucking, it would be disgusting. You wanted me talking to microphones so you could come you off, and everybody would hear it, is that what?

No, I would never do that. Go ahead, I'm sorry, go ahead. The curtain would be, The thing is, go ahead, I would never do that, go ahead. No, go ahead. You're the owner of the place, tell me. The thing is, what was that? What was that?

Oh, really? Is that you or did you fucking own the market on that? Listen go ahead No, it's your it's your mother fucking house if you want the curtain I'll have a to go rent an apartment rather I think you're sarcastic right now. No, no, I'm being serious I told her I'd have to check where Robert look at we're gonna put the curtain But kid though. He didn't you get the curtain the currency can move them so you can just put it there You know actually it's fine. It will make it work. We'll make it work. Yeah, we'll make it work in there. All right All right, you do whatever you gotta do I know

Good bye drunk podcast when you least expect it. We're doing the drunk podcast in two weeks. I got a breathalyzer Oh, yeah, and I want to I want to As we drink during the blood the drunk podcast I want to breathalyze and then I want to do also actually maybe do a contest That point oh seven hit me pretty hard the other night. I have a super human liver I've been going head to head with everybody around the bar the Irish guys and everything Oh, is that a challenge? I'm just saying that we were drinking all night. My blood alcohol was .07 and the guy who was going drink for drink with me was .13. Fuck. Really? Shit. Yeah, but he was in that like a 13-year-old.

That's like that. No, he was a 35-year-old Irishman. Really? Yeah. You're proud of this. I am. I metabolize quickly. Really? Yeah. You're proud of this. I am. I'm metabolized quickly. Really? Yeah. That's why I can hold my liquor. Are you throwing down the gauntlet for the drunk episode? That's right. So you think you can outdrink this jolless me out of retirement? You think you can outdrink jolless and fucking dance soda? Our forces combined. Because I only way 135 pounds So so we're looking at you probably you probably should handy whenever No handy cap you just talking about how you got the bow

Yeah, you just fucking bragged and then you threw it out there and then they took you def you defamated on Irish people I defamated I don't know Damn you're the lawyer Okay, you know what you're good. I got I'll go drink for drink with you You win nobody's gonna you really can't brag about it Like you really you drank him under the table big deal you weighs 130 pounds, right? Look at you and say that I'm a hundred miles of muscle rope

I can do 60 push-ups when I You know in one right now now of course you can I can I can I can now you can't like woman push-ups on your knees No, no real push-ups. No, you can't you can't do 60 in a row. I can do 60 in a row. You can't I can I can I can I can I can't like woman push ups on your knees. No, no real push ups. No, you can't you can't do 60 in a row I can do 60 in a row. You can't I can no you can't No, you can't I'm just doing anything better than you can do anything better than you I get the fuck out of here The owner of I can do probably 60 you can do 60 look at my shoulders. You fucking Gotta really repeat everything

Listen it's better tough podcast for me so far. Why you've been doing great. I think it's fun. We're using back into it I mean, you know, this funny is chill, but you'd be like, I'm never claimed to be. Easy with the real shit. I'm fine. I don't get real. That makes everybody uncomfortable. I never claimed to be, man. Hey, man.

Hey, I do some voices. I do like that. That's cool. I play my part. You know, I'm not Joe. I'm not the truth. I'll drink way more than that guy. Of course you will.

You'd kill that guy. What's your spanish drunk podcast in two weeks? We're gonna have oh Jesus Christ now She's gonna be up my con as a Bunker got cat dead get cast. I'm out of town two weeks But then you're not on it It's all the fun shows. Well, you know what stop fucking getting successful Okay, how's that why you you slow down, you fucking roll. Dan, we got an offer.

Where are you going? No. Where are you going? We're going to be in Seattle. For what? Bumbar shoot. What's that? That's a music festival.

You really are just with all these fucking fest- They're a festival comic. A festival, that's what I'm- That's what I'm- It's a good, I know. It's probably a great fest. It's the biggest one, right? I don't know if it's the biggest one.

It's the second biggest one, right? One of these. Big one of the biggest. Big, big one of the big stage. Big, big one of the- I don't know it's the biggest one. It's the second biggest one right? One of these big one of these big Lots of comedy I can't wait for your fall from grace till you fall from grace till you fall right on your face from grace Black face my name's Dan and it was all in my hand and I blew it away with some beer My friend Joe took me down like a clown beer. A friend Joe took me down like a clown. I don't like that you're making it real. Joe, I'm defending myself. Don't defend yourself. Don't defend yourself. Don't earn the baby. Can you buy some stuff? Don't defend yourself. Take it. Listen, let's talk about this real quick.

You guys brought this book in. First of all, where's my stuff? Buy them all your stuff? Maybe it's at the all. Shut up, damn. Tyler from Blue Microphone, who's a very, we are big fans of, by the way, because Blue Microphone has hooked us us up and we're gonna be doing

Tech Talk today on two of blue microphones little fucking gadget ethos. I'm speaking of what is that? Nice oz. Let's talk about this. Very in America. But one thing I want to talk about right now that Chris has brought to my attention. And both of you guys actually. Yes. We came together. It's not a fleshlight. We drove in together. I want a fleshlight. When is the clock so go as opposed to hook us up. Oh yeah, I'll ask him. Thanks. But until then we have a book. Until we have something we can fuck we have we actually have this book And a tunnel right so Tyler helped us out with the microphones and he also sent books for everybody Yeah, he actually sent us all these these books field guide to chicks of the United States by Joe

Bavino love as this fucking guys name. What a great name? Hey, I'm Joe Bavino. You want to know about a lady? Ace me And Joe Joe, what are you Joe tell me a thing to do about a lady? Ask me. Joe, Joe, what do you, Joe, tell me you think it do about a chick. What, what chick you want to kind of, you got the different chicks? What kind of chick you want to know about? I don't know.

Tell me about blond chicks. I'll tell you about what we call transformers. Thank you. They're Cuban Americans, right? Behaviour, normally extroverted, friendly, and fun-loving, but headstrong and dominant. Tends to be reasonably well-educated, but overly contentious and bubbash that's a made-up word.

At comics. Especially if she's young and low-a-class. Family, war, in it, and religious, mainly Catholic, but savvy, street, smart, and as a city of war, I don't know. Naturally musical. I think we've got to convince the audience that Joe Bavino is in. And I see a word I don't know naturally musical I think we've got to convince the audience that Joe Bavino is in the studio Bobby didn't interview Joe Bavino as Joe Bavino also

Hey, a Joe list. Yes. What do you think about this book? I'll tell you what I think you wouldn't hear when I start on it There's a thing about your her highness about girls from denver what pages that uh... thirty six thirty six i opened it up i was stunned this girl looks just like my ex-girlfriend who is from denver get the five out of here almost to a tea really and mentions the town that the girls from do me a favor please read the

description i want to hear what your actual this. This is Joe lists AK the truth AK T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T- Joe's on fire Fucking back surgery from carrying the cut Give him that fucking bad data fuck you you went to the well too much on that one Shut up get some fucking That's like the third time he's done a joke as well. Oh Really Kelly Kelly kicks him when he's down. That's why I like this thing. I'm carrying a lot of podcasts then.

Wow. I wish he tied that right in your neck. Yeah, hang yourself. You're going to do fucking curtains. All right, so we're going to Joe's girl. Joe's. I want to hear Joe's ex girl. What?

I want to hear the, the, the, the, the, the, the, you want to hear my description of the book's description. I want to hear the book's description. Oh, it does look Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca. Espectacularismos, monumentos, rincones de película y un sincindia aventuras te esperan. ¡Fliparás! Vuelades de madrida murcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros. Volotea. Parifa sujetas a disponibilidad, consulta las condiciones en volotea.com. Kelly, ¿por qué lo sé?

¡Deficionado! Este múltiplo de princess, también known as the mile highness chick, tendra a ser un poco de un poco de la sensación con una sensación muy pesa de la posibilidad also known as the Mile Hines Chick tends to be a healthy looking, with conspicuous absence of plastic or cosmetic surgery, but relatively plain, with little or no makeup or fashion sense. I'd go for a number of makeup and had terrible fashion sense. Her comfortable style sometimes referred to as lesbian, cheek, or girl next door with a touch of country often includes kitten heels, I don't know what that is.

Old, Levi, or seven for all mankind, jeans, I don't know what a lot of the stuff means There's a bunch more stuff She's oh hi, I'll sit low out down to earth pleasant and welcoming as a rule But occasionally snobbish towards folks who aren't from her pot of fire Oh snobby towards me because I'm from the poor part. Yeah, that was true. She very stabby. She hated me very much. She was from Creek. I'm from Aurora. She was from Creek. I'm from Aurora.

I'm from the poor part. She is from the rich part. She is from the rich part. I'm from the poor part. I'm part. I'm part. I'm part. That was like a really bad episode of like a sitcom. When they died, let the white dead trust a rap. Am I the fucking dead? There we go. She just called you a fucking dead.

Listen, Bovino. Hey guys. And this is coming from Joe Bovino. I know women. Let me tell you about the bloody asshole Australia. Oh, oh. When the weight comes, they hit Skitbigger They kick men when they're down

Here's a thing with this book too that's pretty interesting then when we did our book cheat That hasn't it's coming out. It's great October 7. Have you read it? Yeah, read it while pooping. How was it? It's great. You know you laughing funny, right? It's a the poop of the book the poop, but the book was there laughing. Funny right? It's the poop of the book. The poop. But the book was there in the room. No, the book's really fucking funny. But it's the difference between this book and that book. Your book is just straight up. Straight up. Straight up fucking. But it's fucking hilarious. But it's like there's some even as a guy you're like, what? Here's the thing with this book, which is you can leave this around your house and you check it. Yeah, crack this all But it's not me. Not me. This is not me. I'm looking like you don't know why you would you

Yeah, she's crying. Why would you read this? I don't know. You had to put it down. I couldn't read it anymore really It was funny and it was great, but I was like this is giving me it's too much You could just spin her too hot But this. You haven't quite explained what this book is. I'm well getting to that right now. That's the honor of this chair, Joe, is that I get around to it.

So what's for the past? You're going to be the boss? You're going to be the boss? You've got one, Joe's on fire. You want to be the boss? The fat choke. Why are you being mean to me? Well, you just called me a fat fuck round.

Yeah, you called me round. You called me a fat fuck. You can never say why is somebody being mean to me? You just called me a fat fuck round. Yeah, you called me round. You can never say why is somebody being mean to me. You're meaner than anybody. Yeah. What? I want to take a poll of the meanest people. But she's slightly mean. I throw out Zung's and she just sounds a little hot.

It's under a breath like he's used that before. He thinks he's better than everyone. I'm like, no, I don't. He doesn't wait. He is a zunger. If Kelly was a professional wrestling manager, she'd be the wrestling manager that throws salt in her own wrestler's eyes,

and then the guy pins him for the belt, and then she gets in the ring with the opponent. She's like, yeah, he's the hero to arm. And he's a new into continental champion. And the guests who come in for the first second. Hang on, let's get a point. I'm going one second hang on let's get Point I'm gonna hold it. Let's get dry mouth on that fucking long-winded speech He's the guy with the belt and then the manager who goes in the ring excellent analogy Wow don't even start untiring that I got thirsty on that one go ahead there fucking baby mouth

I'm I'm getting I'm getting called the meanest Kelly refers to two guests as the audience. No but not the audience. The quote unquote audience has done nothing but jokes about my physical features and I can't even change. I don't even have I'm not gonna have jaw surgery. We're taking all the donations in August. Joe a normal month. Oh, get Joe a normal month. Get Joe a normal month. Get Joe a normal month. Oh, he can choose. I want Joe to be serial like the rest of the kids.

Can I count that? I'll tell you about that. I'll tell a quick funny story about my girlfriend, featured from Colorado. Denver, one time we were dating for a while. We were in love, whatever. And she goes to whatever. I was in love. she just sat there. That's a Woody Allen joke We fell in love I fell in love she just sat there

All right, what do you Allen just bummed? Anyways, oh she was looking at my mouth and she was like hey, I have a real bad Oh, she was like what you guys haven't even mentioned my over bite so I'm overbiting so I'm a lot of luck. We can't just... We can't just... We can't just... We can't even shoot it. Yeah! Yeah! We... We're looking through a mouse hole.

Yeah, that's the... The hobble telescope, and we're looking in the mouth. Alright! Alright! Now, I'll take your word. The hobble telescope, it's kind of like... ...spre-seeing things far away. We're...

I mean, stars are not smaller. Huge. They're just far away. Can I have that? Yeah, yeah. huge I am that thank you Anyway, she looked at my over bite Wait a minute. Oh boy. Sorry. Go ahead My over bite. I'm glad she was like a she goes. Hey. Oh, wow first you want like this Oh, which is not a reaction you want from someone who's in love with you looking at your face Yeah, and then she went to are you gonna? So you gonna get like braces or something?

Jesus like braces or something? She says, I was like, braces wouldn't help and over, but I already had braces. Anyway, and she goes, we're gonna have surgery. And I was like, I don't even think that's a surgery.

I don't have health insurance. What? And then she said, this is a quote from my ex-girlfriend, love of my life. So you're just gonna look like that, like forever? Oh my God. You were still, you dated after you said that to you.

Yeah, and I was like, I never thought of it that way, but I mean, I could get worse. It might look worse than this at some point. How? And another quick stirrup you want to hit this one? I searched her Gmail account. I searched my name on her Gmail account and we first started dating to see her talking

about how much she loved me, like two months in. Oh no. And I found a thing describing me to her best friend. Oh no. And it was just, it was like this. Just met this guy in love with them. Gonna marry him. Funniest guy I've ever met. So nice. Unattractive. But a great guy. Fuckin' hell. Yeah, so let me ask you a question. I'm describing. what where she off Joe Joe Joe Joe Joe Joe Joe Joe Joe

Unattractive at all. What's beautiful? Wow? Really is Kelly's doing that thing like she's the little girl that like like pulls his hair She's got a crush on him. No, or I'll take that. I got it. I got it. I think this man Dan is flying around around. There we go. I think Joe, I think you're a good looking guy. Thanks, buddy. I think you definitely, you definitely a type. You know what I mean? You're a type. Yeah, hilarious charming, very funny. Yeah, yeah. Big penis. Yeah, he's got a thick member. And you know what I bet? I bet.

I mean, he's a... He stayed with me for two. Oh, this is a fun story. For two days in Montreal, he stayed with me. I met my laptop one morning. Yeah. And he just comes out of the shower every day. He'd come out of the shower naked.

And he's back. Hey, what's up, dude? Hey, it is... We're talking about Dero. So you're talking about list. List. Okay. So I met my laptop in the hotel room. And I was, Hey, what's up, dude? And he's like, we're talking about Dero. So you're talking about list list. Okay. So I'm at my laptop, right in the hotel room. And I was gonna hear Jugga. Hey, Hey, soda. Hey, soda. And I look over.

And he's like half plumped up. And I'm super hung over. I was gonna fucking thick piece, bro. I didn't know you were a thick cut. Oh, I'm a big dick. Well, God bless you with a big dick in the small mouth. We're good to know. You know what?

So you don't blow yourself. You can't. It's nature's way of stopping. I was trying to, I thought it would be funny to get a bone. I wanted to get a big boner and walk out into the gym's room with it. And I tried for like nine minutes. You were looking at the fucking his head and you just do it. I wasn't, I was trying to get it while I was in the shower going.

So anyways, I've been handed the nice us section of the book. All right, we're gonna read this, then we're gonna take a break. I wanna go on and then we're gonna come back and we got a bunch of stuff we gotta do. So I want to, this book right now is called Field Guide to Chicks of the United States. It's actually, It's for me, Joe Bovino.

It's for me, no. I mean, a lair is if you actually talk like that. Joe's gonna go into this right now, but it's actually a very interesting book. It has all, it's very colorful. It's got these really slamming, hard fucking graphics is what they call it in the industry. All right, we get it.

It's like a bird watching book. It's like a bird watching before women. But what, what did you say, we get it? Yeah. What do you mean we get? Yeah, isn't your industry terms? You come off set, you're just throwing your industry terms around, you got it. You know what, you know we get it? Yeah, what do you mean you get what in your industry terms you come off set? You're throwing your industry terms around

Out make it change Bobby Hollywood Hollywood I'm like, yeah! Hollywood! But I had a woo! Yeah, there you go! Is it coming with those stars sunglasses? Yeah. Is it going to have an assistant?

Are you getting an assistant? Yeah. Where is my sunglasses? Kelly? I think they want to hear. Hollywood! Maybe you should. You better read it.

I'm scared I'm going to get a... Not so. This is yours being mean. Australian American, authentication, road metro, rarely opts for play, American, authentication, roll measure out, rarely opts for play, accessory,

fit, healthy looking. Since they have a simply style, standing blonde or brown hair, we're a little of no makeup. Often talks in a rewind voice. Every minute, every minute, every behavior is vocariously independent, adventurous, out to Aussie.

I'll kick a man when he's there. LAUGHTER Hey, man. I used to be a fanly independent, adventurous. At Jersey, I'll kick him in when he's there. Hey man. I used to be good. Hey man. Oh gross. One second man. Bobby Woods. Hey, that is Bobby Woods.

Is there any blistaxe? Guys, hey. Hey, you guys listen, this is weird. I learned this when I was on set, Dennis Larry. I just call him Larry. Hey D come I call him. Yeah, you know what's so funny when we were shooting the first day I I'm literally I put my I put my fucking Larry was there. Yeah and I put my drink down my coffee down inside the van we were shooting that yeah he lands in the one he goes don't put you fucking coffee there somebody's

gonna slip on that and like yell that, and I was like, sorry, dude! I was like, okay, I know. You mad at me? I don't know, I got so fucking shell shocked. I got yelled at by the fucking boss on the first day, and I think he did it just to fucking yell at me too, this motherfucker.

Sure, and this is a pretty good one for Kelly. All right. Maiding. This is the nice, awesome Australian American. Okay, good. Australian American. Relatively promiscuous. What page is this?

What page is this? Let's put questions on it. 95. 95. 95. I would say, I would say yes. I would say yes. Relatively promiscuous?

Yes. Yes. Relatively. Sexually open. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, And our asshole hangs out of those jeans often comfortable with nudity and uninhibited in bed This is where we lose her yeah low maintenance low drama And high energy as a rule. I am

I'm hygiene and I'm low maintenance low drama. Yeah, but you lost her at fucking confident being naked We also lose her at remarkably raw sense of humor. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I love being back to we're gonna take a quick break. We're gonna talk about this book by what's his name? Joe. Jovino. We're gonna talk to the boys at laugh button and- No, they know. That was just because I was describing the joke. And I wanna fuck with some of our sponsors right now.

So hang on tight. Dang it. All right, we're back. We're not back. We're doing sponsors. We're gonna thank some of our sponsors right now. Listen, first of all, Dan, you can help me out with this and Kelly, you can help too. Absolutely. Absolutely. We have official sponsors this show right now. If you buy anything on the

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don't go to another fucking podcast on the site, go to our site, hit the Amazon button and buy from there. And what that does, it helps you, it helps Amazon, it helps us. We get a small percentage, but here's a spread the word, have other people do it Whatever you do whatever you buy get it off of our site Amazon dot com There's new sponsor the show. I got the first check

13 dollars Here's the one little Baby step also the bigger things you buy the more money you get off that's true if you're gonna buy a boat yeah you know maybe maybe a fucking that is a great call back dance maybe a 25 foot Boston fucking well uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh Amazon.com but buy from our page. Do you know what dude podcast page on right cast.com? Make sure you buy it. Don't go to anybody else's fuck every Listen to their shows, but you don't buy Amazon fucking great network But just don't buy don't buy it. Don't do it. You buy it all from us us We siphon because if we don't fucking survive they don't fucking survive

We are what they call the host So is we are in another sponsor is game fly Game fly if you like Netflix, which I do love it love it It's the video game Netflix You just remembered some of the stuff that they wrote it is if you like Netflix and you love video games You'll love Gamefly. I'm a member you can go right now to Gamefly dot com slash YKWD Gamefly dot com slash YKW d join up you're gonna get two

three weeks which is a twenty two ninety five dollar value. All right two three weeks of or anything whatever games you want the best part of it you don't have to fucking pay for this sixty dollar game and then and then and then and then you done playing it and you're gonna go back you get four dollars for it, you know It stinks get the games rent them play them and send them back at another game And then if you don't like that game get another game go back to the game you like you can I think I think two games at a time And it's very cheap and for right now if you go to gamefly.com slash ykwd join up through that You're helping us you you're helping yourself,

and you can cancel anytime you want. That's the best part. No nothing. You can cancel anytime you want, but if you get it, you're not gonna want to cancel it. If you're a fucking nerd like me, you like video games, you like experimenting with new games that you probably wouldn't buy,

because there's still $50, $40 at the end. You can just get them, and it's cheap. You save yourself money, you're giving us money, and you're giving a big corporation like Gamefly a lot of money. So that's good. He sold me. It pays for itself.

It's awesome. It's awesome. Stop fucking around with stupid $60 games that are just gonna sit there and collect dust. Go to Gamefly.com, YKWD, slash YKWD, and join right now, two free free weeks and it's the best thing you're going to do for yourself. That's it. And we have unofficial sponsors of course laugh button. Yes button dot com. The laugh button you guys. You got any stuff coming up

that you want to promote real quick? Goodness. What do we have coming up? We're looking for something for the CMJ marathon in October. Yeah, we're putting a show together to be to be determined. Yep. We just redesigned the website and relaunched it, and hold new layout, look to it. Awesome. We've got a lot of our interviews on from just for laugh still. We had a lot of interviews with some comics that were put up there. Yeah.

Talked to a bunch of great people. Awesome. Yeah, just check out the website and if you like it, tell a friend and share some stories. Yeah, man, spread the word. You guys, I go to a few website, Gizmodo, CNN CNN, laugh button those are the websites I go to to check out my shit when I wake up I get my phone I check out these websites of course I go to Twitter and all that shit but these are the websites that I check out on my phone. Are you guys get the app coming out soon? No we don't have an app

coming out soon but we gotta get on that we gotta get the fuck on that. We just relaunched the site and hopefully we'll be able to launch an app or the site comes up pretty cool on the iPhone anyways yeah it's launched it's optimized for mobile all that kind of yeah so you're good to go make sure you check out them out check out laughs bin another fan and cream shema great guys anyone on the club the new clubs are the stand it's I heard end of August by end of August yeah I'm still thinking y'all's a fitness. No. No. Not right now, but you can. But I really do want to thank a cringe humor and the stand Patrick. They came on the show. I want to get Patrick back on. He's a good guy.

He's a good guy. I we have a lot of fucking history in me in that big motherfucker. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, I don't tell you what happened. He sent me out with someone really Oh, no You didn't fuck him. No, not yeah hang on. We're in the fucking promos. Let's get to that Talking to Dan yeah, and also I've got the address for a fans want to send through some I got the first thing Somebody sent us a pencil drawing of Petri Sonia.

Oh, wow, where is it? It's at my house. I'm going to get a frame we're going to bring it in. So a fan did, Kelly's elephant. We got the life size. Faker, Kelly. Faker, Robert Kelly, from you guys. I got the bubble machines up there that you gave me

and Dan at day. So this room is starting to fill up. I met a fan in Syracuse, came out to a show Alex. You got me in Dan and I. So this room is starting to fill up. I met a fan in Syracuse, came out to a show, Alex. He wanted to send in a picture as well. So what's the address? The address is 676A 9th Avenue, 424, New York, New York, 10036. Something that's in there.

I think I just lost sight in my left eye. I don't think it's live disease. I think it's fucking Australian disease. I think my body's shutting down because I'm around Kelly. Yeah. That was a very long winded brawbitt. It was. I called you brawbitt. A brawbitt. Very long winded brawbitt. Those are our sponsors.

All right, we're back. We're about to find out if Dan has a dance. Dan's got it. Dan's got it. Ah, I ain't a wolf. What if, oh my God. What if we're joking about you having a dance and then you find out that you have it. And that's why your armpits were so so long.

Jesus Christ Kelly. Oh my god, that almost stopped my heart That's probably the limes disease actually Oh my god, I almost stopped my heart I was taking advantage of that was so fun You have fucking armpit aids. It was funny See it's not funny at all. It was funny. You have lymph nodes Our fed aids would be funnier if you did if there wasn't such thing as armpit cancer. Yeah, thank you Now I'm really freaked out. What is it? Oh, yeah, that's true. He could have that

Why you guys fucking you guys? You don't really have armpit cancer. It's more like in lymph nodes Yeah, the lymph nodes are in your armpits Yeah, you have cancer in your armpits. Oh What okay, what is it? Yeah, you have cancer in your armpits. Oh What okay, what is it yeah, he wrote He wrote she didn't he wrote did she give you any diseases and I wrote no Why and then he wrote thinking about fucking her? Oh, okay, okay cool. Oh, they're okay I hope she has that that's like the head bird joke. That's a very roundabout STD testing system.

That didn't get a laugh, but I have a plethora of STDs. So take that shit serious. This wasn't listening, Jack. Here's a deal. It was much head bird joke. So let's go back. Are you on the phone? Oh.

Are you on the phone? Do I look like I'm on the phone? OK. Well, anyways, this book is, this book we were talking about before is actually pretty funny. It's actually really cool if you, uh, it's actually, I would, I would read this, what's wrong? What happened? What did I do? Cool. It just seemed like you were definitely thinking about something other than the book.

I'll agree, I'll admit it. You don't know what it was? It was my sandwich sandwich It was my sandwich You're like this, this book is good You're like a teacher that's trying to lead class while thinking about his bills Like yeah I don't mean to interrupt the host but I'm gonna read the book on the train right now Because I gotta run to a whiplash Whiplash if you guys want to see me at whiplash

three weeks ago. I will be at whiplash three weeks ago. That's fun buddy. I like to for ignoring me saying goodbye. But I'm going to have a good luck. You got some good material tonight. Appreciate you. I'm so sorry. Yeah. The ticsuff was on file. You were killing today. I'll hear about it on Twitter. I'm sure people will say hey tiny mouth you douche Funny you say I said that what's that who said you should die? Well, I don't want to get into that. I do I want to get into that I'm scared to death of what no, did you see what he wrote me? Yeah, I didn't see what he wrote you he wrote this guy wrote like I don't know which one who I want to piss on more you were joeless and then I wrote back and see what he wrote you he wrote uh... this guy wrote like uh...

i don't know which one who i want to piss on more you are joe listen to and i wrote back what can we both p on you and then he wrote uh... no that's not the same guy no that was a same guy and then the guy wrote uh... he wrote a shit i think i did something wrong joe list blocked me and i wrote yeah you know the rules smiley face or let them know you're joking and uh... the little while ago he was given shit to Joe no that was a different guy now say hi I don't know and I message him because he was like

this is his guy and I'm a team and I went why you giving Joe less time back off he was writing die I want you to die yeah i'm gonna kill you in time he's like i remember the little nerve-racking cuz it's very easy in this day now you should find me i'm publicly say where i'm gonna be yeah i'm gonna get shot in the fucking face nobody goes to Brooklyn listen ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Little act, okay? I'm sorry Dan was that apologize? It kind of close to home, Bobby. You made him choke now. We made me choke on tune.

Oh, wow. Dude, it hurts. It's things. Apologize. So here's a deal. You're fine, dude. First of all, nobody wants you to really die. We don't want you to die, dude. I want you to find die. Nobody wants you to die, dude.

Oh, what's fine. These, here's the deal. He's fucking, look at, I get it, too, dude. You know what I mean? You know, you know, you put something out there. I get so fucking envious of these people who can actually say, wow, I had a really great day today. This, I did that, and this, and I really want to thank these people.

Because if I do that, I get fucking nine, you know, nine fucking fat, fat fucking fucking, fucking really good for you. Nobody cares, you fucking cunt. Die, fuck, it's like what the fuck? I gotta say thank it. That's just the fans, that's why I haven't put the smiley face because at least then you know, I'm kidding, I'm fucking joking.

This guy didn't do that, he said fucking die, but I knew I could see, I read his other stuff and he was kinda like, I fucked kidding. I'm fucking joking. This guy didn't do that. He said fucking die But I knew I could see I read his other stuff and he was kind of like I fucked up Look at some of these guys don't know any fucking better, okay? Really they don't fucking know it's some idiot Who it's just fucking you know has a thing in his hand that he can just try to be bust balls And it doesn't know how to fucking do it. He's probably in the woods He probably catches alligators for fucking alligators lives in Bushwick for uh, what you really fucking both just stepped on the end of that I was just saying and let's

He looks the most notoriously dangerous neighborhood in the city You know what I was gonna catch a hot bandander on the end of that one I saved you from a bandam I tried to I just tried to enhance alligators It's big and elegant You know the hunt alligators he lives in the murder capital of New York. Where's that pushwake? Oh the guy lives in bushwick Oh, do that guy? Oh Shit, you know what dude?

But he this night emailed me a few times. I would try to smile bigger so he doesn't know what you Damn, but he email if you don't put a diamond you mouth Bigger let's stand that's the picture you next to the cut-out from last year Oh, it's too fucking Yes First of all, the audience is laughing. Pregnazone makes you retain water. Pregnazone. Pregnazone.

All right, Kelly. What were you up to go? No, we just silly. I mean, Joe, I don't think so. Are you sure? Ha ha. I really don't think so. I responded to both saying when I was out here, but I appreciate David and then he wrote back. He said, when I had nothing, he said, just leave the lane, shut up. So pendant your right, you said, right.

I've heard of the ad symbol in front of his name, so I didn't want to be here. I've got to roll me fucking enough with the fucking Kelly action. It's getting dark. Oh fuck yourself I don't get it. It's like I got tuna on my mic Anyway, this guy was like give me a chance give me a chance to the point where I was like fuck I think I'm gonna give this guy a chance and then what we like but then when he's in the show When he did the thing to Joe, I was like never gonna happen now you fuck with Joe when he did the thing with Joe, when he did the thing with Joe, I was like, never gonna happen now. You fuck with Joe.

We should have killed him. No, K. Hang on, what's up? You don't make a killer horny, are you? Sally, Kelly, go ahead, say what you say, right? You fuck with Joe what? You fuck with Joe, you fuck with me. Yeah, if you want to-

If you want to- If you want to- If you want to- If you want to be loyal to my friends, and no one fucks with my friends. You fuck with Joe, you're never getting to your pussy. But now we're gonna get murdered. Seriously, can we cut this out?

This guy's gonna fuck with me. Now we're sorry, now we're gonna fuck Kelly. Kelly, come with me. You're never getting the up pushing Nobody's gonna fucking touch you Joe this kid likes you Say that to you on the show This is your solution But then list as a big listening I'm not Think of the story that laugh button could do about Life and death Death that he wanted to be proud Sometimes I shit on Joe list. He actually blocked me. I feel bad. I'm a hater

That's it Listen to me I feel bad I'm a hater. Yeah, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh I thought it was a thick dick joke, because you're gonna think dick apparently. I mean, I said it was a killing joke. I'm gonna have to do it. I just, I just, I could, he easily defended Joe just then, and who he did was get angry at me, and I'm like, Joe, like. Yeah, you defended me. Joe, you got to go.

You have to go. I know, I'm gonna miss my fucking fight. You're gonna miss your fight. It's not that I don't appreciate your defending. You could have saved your own life, but you know, you run into a competition. You're defending me in a way. You'd rather not die, and not thank me. Your way of defending me is telling a person

who wants me dead. And now I was nice. I'm the reason. I'm the reason. But then you went in fact with Joe Litz, and now I'm gonna make sure you never get this. Let's push these guys to show opening a fucking knife listening to this podcast.

Now he's gonna rape me and call me Kelly the whole time. It's not going for your mouth. Now I'll take that. Now you're in on the show, Joe. So, Joe, you're gonna get out of here, man. Yeah, you're gonna go, Joe. Hey, everybody, Joe List, Agile List. What's your Twitter?

Joe List, comedy. This is like Quinn's joke. You, I'm just gonna start shooting at him. What's the fucking leaving? I? This is like Quinn's joke Acho list on at your list right? At your list comedy on Twitter fucking could you god damn it? Just come on the woodwork and be nice to Joe say some nice things to him let somebody you know what it feels good When somebody says nice shit it really I want you to show me we just also asked if Joe lets that would be good to you. Yeah, Joe. Oh, you don't follow stuka. You don't follow stuka Twitter. I don't know. Just like to rise up. You follow you. Follow everybody. What the

follow you? What the fuck? See you later. That's fucked up though. We do we look at in here. We have a bond. Okay, the apocalypse happens. We are all fucking helping each other survive Talk to you later Joe see you later Joe. Bye Joe Joe don't leave don't leave. Don't leave, Joe. Don't leave. Hang on. Hey, Jeff, we can hear you fake walking. I just...

No wonder you haven't booked anything. You can't even fake walk. Get out of here so I can talk about you. Oh, all right. Wow, Kelly, you showed us your tits. Guys, you got big my boobs have gotten. Kelly. Oh, we're all going to love it. Kelly, why are you showed us your tips Guys, I think I think my boobs have gotten Kelly We're all going up

Kelly, why are you sucking everybody's cock? All right, why'd you have to do that? I just took it too far. That's what I do, Ace I'm a clown with you So that's a very joj de roza thing, not to follow someone back Joj de roza doesn't follow anybody Oh, we got to give List, go get him What? What? Go get him, we've got to give list go get him go get him. What what go get him. We forgot to give him his gift

The guys the guys gave him his um is getty mic. Have go get him Bring him back up here. She's yelling in the hallway. It's alright. Go get him Joe So anyways we Hope she gets fucking elbowed by Ava Ha this fucking podcast has been crazy. Who are you waiting to call? Who are you waiting to call? Well, somebody who's gonna call.

Joe DeRosa? This fucking twat was gonna call. Oh, I'll call her. Oh, is it Kathy K? Who? Is it Kathy K? Is that who it is? Why?

That's just really funer. Why is it Kathy K? I don't know. I want to be Kathy. I was putting money really fun. Why is it Cathy Kay? I don't know. I want to be Cathy. I was putting money on it. Why would it be here though? Because? Because you what?

Turned out. Oh shit. Get in here. Is that better? Yeah. Here you get the Cathy. I nailed it. I fucking knew it. Here's go. I'm down there.

I fucking knew it. Here's the deal. Yeah, she was pissed at you. Yeah, because I stopped following her. Yeah. On Twitter. Why did you stop following her? I was in a bad mood, and it was just annoying to shit.

She only puts positive things out there. Literally, like, you know, what was she like, life is what you make. It didn't make sense. It didn't make sense. It made me fucking angry, and it didn't make sense. And I was sense it made me fucking angry and it didn't make sense and I was in a really bad mood and I didn't want to hear that I just upset me I was on the train coming back from Syracuse and I read her tweet it it fucking hurt me it hurt you but she's just

I think Kathy's all right I don't have a problem with Kathy right okay I'll Kathy that was on the show that time yeah but I stopped following her on Twitter and she got upset I knew she was gonna know too she cuz there's a 171 followers say when you got 1700 oh you're 50 yeah but so here's the thing it's why do really it's nothing personal against her you just later to it's it's just fucking annoyed me there's people you know annoyed you have to be to unfollow somebody it it was like what was the tweet It was like your life won't change until changes in your life

I'm like what the fuck does that mean I was just and I had this family behind me that were just these fucking poster for every reason that terrorists hate us. They were just like loud on the amp track He's like, is this New York? Is this New York? Honey! Oh my god! I was trying to sleep and they were just fucking being shit faces then I get on Twitter and I got to know it. At a moment a week I'll follow her again if it makes her feel better.

There was fat listeners of the show were given Joe Liss shit on Friday because I were at the show going, Joe you know follow, follow me, come on, make my day. And they were all like, Joe, what's wrong with you? What's wrong with you? Any still didn't do it. I'll follow Rickent. I mean, I don't care. Dude, I see you stick to your guns.

No, fucking don't follow it. It's just big goddamn man. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, she was mad though. I don't care. She was mom. She was gonna call up and fucking curse you out. Curse me out.

Oh, right tweets that don't sound like you're a fucking coming out of surgery And you're just speaking gibberish. Yeah, let her call him out when you wake up someone when you wake up I know we we got it when you wake someone up from surgery Can we explain you what a pilot is? Hold on real quick Fuck it with Danco to all of that. It's good. I'm like, let her call him out on it, cause he'll fuckin' crush it.

She won't be able to fight back, and she might cry at the end. No, no, no, no, she won't. No, she won't. I've seen Kathy fight. She fights like a goddamn gator. God damn no, motherfucker. I missed that.

She go slapin' and clapin' and God damn gator fight. I fuckin' missed the goddamn galea The Joe the Rosa coming to the play to the goddamn I'm in the bar and I saw the Rosa on his birthday. He was covered in a swamp a whiskey and it was like I got damn Galea fight I got my backpack taking it Joe the Rosa's birthday party. What happened? I have my backpack at the Rosa's birthday party which one I know one of those many of them is sweet the 16s Yeah, it's every year would you would you go to the you go to the industry one of the industry friend one I went to the the post industry No, but I went to the one at the bar. I went to both of them, but I went to the bar and

I put my bag down and Music from outside that That's OK. Keep going. I put my bag down. I'm having a drink with another comic. And then I go to the bathroom and look to see where my bag is. And it's gone. And the bouncer's like, yes, I'll two teenage kids in here.

He's like, they snuck in. And I saw him high step under their bag. Here's the crazy shit. One Patrick from the Creek in the Cave is outside smoking a cigarette with me. And he goes, you know what happened? He goes, is there anything in there? I go, no, I'm a joke book and a novel that I'm reading.

And he goes, you know what? Guarantee they threw it in the trash. We walked down, it's on 14th Street. We're in between 7th and 8th. We walked towards 7th. I don't see it. I'm like, dude, fuck it, man. It was a book.

I'll buy it. It's an old joke book. I go back inside, have a drink, come come back out Patrick comes around the corner from eighth avenue Fucking boom bag in hand. Oh, I was like I found it around the corner Yeah, not another one mega fucking kid throws something stole away the shitty jokes Well, he doesn't understand I do them in voices Yeah, and that's what makes them better god damn get a bad one. I get a corn dog What the fuck this me man?

God damn data fight. They don't mean nothing So the kids are so the kids are so little white Yeah Oh Curse him out Dan do it please Get a girl. I'm ready Hello it please. I'm fine with this. I'm gonna get a go bone. Hello. Okay, I got it down. I got it down. Go ahead. Oh my god, you're still on. Hang on, Kathy. We need to spend. Hang on. We need to lower you. We need to put it on Kathy. Oh my god, talk. You got to lower the volume. Yeah, we have to put it on

Kathy voice. I'll try not to laugh. I'll try not to give my listeners that's a renders laugh okay Kathy we were just talking about it that Dan Dan knows why you're calling why you told him I thought we were gonna like you guys were an ambush me Bobby how do you plan on doing you kind of of figured that out. I fucking I did that. Yeah, I called I'm not CNN. I'm just it's a fucking dumb podcast and this fucking cookie broad is mad at you You got two good points. You have two very solid rocks all points. Yeah, I'm not fucking she you know It's not this chick you banged in high school when your kids on the other line dad What so so so Dan in high school and your kids on the other line. That would have been a bad, a hell of a creeper. So Dan, you got to explain to Dan why you mad.

Everybody, if you don't know who this is, then you're not a fan of the show. You're a American listener. You're the greatest episode ever. Yeah, this is Kathy Kaye. She went on a date with former lover of droto. Yes. She went on a date with Joe D. Dangerous Joe. And it didn't go

too well, right, Kathy? I mean, Joe thought it wouldn't work tonight. I thought it was fun, but he was pretty tough. Yeah, but you fucking did crack addicts before, so. And then you went on a date with Dan Dan. You had you had a great time. You had a great time. Yeah, I thought so. Mm-hmm. I liked Dan. And then you looked on your Twitter and you saw that Dan. I can't follow each other that night.

Yeah. And then we just, he just broke up with me. I didn't break up with you. I just stopped following you. I was in a very, I was on the Amtrak coming back from Syracuse. I explained to you what you, because it's on the show. She's trying to hear it. Yeah, yeah. So I can't hear Dan. Could you like could you give Dan the phone cuz you so muffled?

Yeah, sorry, go ahead. Can you hear me? Yeah, now people are how about now? Yeah, she's got you. Okay, so I was irritated on the Amtrak and just one of your tweets. I didn't think made sense and I was feeling friskyky so I unfollowed you. Okay, that's how like, you know, that makes sense. I get it. I was like, I mean, I was calling Robert for something else, but I decided to just tell him like, oh, could I do the who unfollowed me on Twitter thing?

You know, dot com. What the fuck, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what What the fuck? Wait a minute you fucking cock fucking sucka What you said to me you you were pissed at the time now you're not But you were pissed at the time and you like I want to talk to him I go call him a show be funny and now you like that mad. I got it I'm out of the piece of lens for 20 minutes. It's just like whatever I got mad at you. Oh fuck I told her I said I was irritated the tweet. I read it. I didn't make sense

So I unfollowed it you said it was stupid. I said it didn't make sense you said was stupid I'm sure it was that's cool. That's fine Bobby your whole little plot unfoyiling right in front of you. Well, guess who's fucking hanging up on your face? Wait, but no, I mean, did I never really read your Thank you. Wow That's great. Just like that boom. That's how this fucking show works. Yeah, she fucking one and done right one No, she'll be back on she's a crazy bitch. She I mean she is I want so much self-confidence

I want to get to this first of all Joe walked out without a fucking beautiful gift gift that the boys brought from Laugh button you guys are so good to us man. We are we really are you fucking Unbelievable to us you've you've hooked us up with microphones and another thing too that helps the show you give us yeti mics each individual person on the show cat Kelly Last name for stucco. Yeah, yeah, you know that I was fucked up a couple months And then she's got some weight in her blouse and it's changing the way your It's called a blouse. I don't know Jesus Christ her fucking top 90 Her top 90 It's like what you wear on that's what you should wear on your anniversary with your husband

Well, she gave me a present. She gave you an elephant that she bought from the fucking bodega I sorry buy it four bucks trunks up. It's a trunks up man Fucking trunks up kid. I know it is she cares about my fucking show and what my Guinness Pubble nothing I know it is she cares about my fucking show and what my Guinness Pubble nothing I brought that back from overseas I what I said before I'm like you get those three I want to talk about this you guys you give us now here's the thing I get this all the time about fucking I want to start a podcast How do you use how do you start it get a yeti

microphone it's your new at fucking podcasting you want a podcast you don't want to spend fucking a thousand three thousand five thousand dollars get a yeti microphone it's a hundred something bucks get them off of Amazon dot fucking calm go to riot cast Slash robber Kelly you know what And get yourself a yeti microphone dude yeti mics are fucking awesome. We had so much fun when I was in that hotel and Philly Yeah, cutting promos when we're skyping. Yeah, I'm fucking believeable I'm a long luscious here. Here's the thing with the yeti microphone too is that it has four different settings You can have one person two people you can get people four people back in my long, luscious hair. Here's the thing with the Eddie microphone too, is that it has four different settings. You can have one person, two people,

you can get the whole. Great people, four people, five people, six. You can make it into a condenser mic where it picks up everybody. If you're starting out a podcast, you wanna just fuck around and not spend the money. And you know, you start out on a high level, but a low level as far as easy to use,

but on a very high level as far as audio goes, Vos and Bonnie used one for their first fucking 50 episodes of their podcast. I used one Yeti microphone. We did. We used the Yeti mic for the ghost episode. Yeah, because you carry yours around with you, because you do a lot of promos for the show. Kelly has one when she does promos for the show. You plug it right in. you put on garage band And you got a fucking sick ass mic that's crystal clear and you could do whatever you want with it We brought one for Joe And you brought now Joe Joe list has one and I mean, you know the mic is a little big for his mouth But here's a thing right they they're coming up with an adapter. It's called baby Mike

That's actually bringing me to this next thing we're gonna do a little tech talk with you guys. Yeah please. And then we're gonna what's that? We're gonna do a song. Yeah we're gonna know. Okay but hang on. We're gonna I'm here by against doctors orders by the way. Robert Kelly is performing against Dr. as orders. Robert Kelly is performing against Dr. as orders. We can name this episode zone, right? Yeah.

I was going to name it. I was going to name it. I was going to write the toenails. There's a lot of names. Take the tick in the toenails. Bobby would.

Bobby would. I like Bobby would zone. If you read the card I put onto the bag. I said I like grads Bobby would There's a car. Yeah, wow, my mom was think bad though. It is that's not abandoned. I know it's just pointing out a fact I'll leave you a little bit more fun. You're ruthless with the bandana She's so sweet you're a very genuine person.. I really mean that. You're a very sweet person. You're very genuine. Klinging to her citizenship here. And if you're if your comedy could ever become as genuine as you are I'm kidding Kelly. You're fucking beautiful really. Thank you for that. That means a lot and Dan. Thank you for

Guinness Bevel. I was gonna gonna I was gonna call it trunks up oh wow zone is I want to talk I want to talk to you guys when you let her watch your apartment you fucked her and my first while I said no fucking I we've never been at your apartment at the same time. Why could you say apartment? Why didn't that come out? You've been enough fuck people in my place, especially this fucking monster I was a guy when I was house sitting and he wanted to come over and I said no You try When I was house sitting and he wanted to come over and I said no

Dick You fucked everywhere else That doesn't count I got you a fucking dude you fucking We do you gotta take it off somewhere and I did it it's your cool what did you do in the kitchen how many were you doing the

kitchen was being I know you have just a thumping vein on the top of your car to do I have a nice thick blue vein uh I bet you dick looks like you forum does little Harry yeah it's just as hair on the shaft

sparse hair on the shaft it does yeah listen she didn't fuck anybody in my shoe. Did you beat off? Yes. You didn't flick the bean on the bench in the shower? Yeah. You don't know how to live life. I watched Monday Night Football while jerking off, while sitting down. You fucking jerked off in my shower. Yeah, why don't you go check every

episode that we talked about that? Oh yeah.. I am I think I probably try to never The calm down the drain. Yeah, the cool. Yeah, the cool. I had a few times. Chris you jerk off. Do you Yeah, I've always wanted a man. I always always wanted to ask like the head of something very important. The might cry for a question. Well, dirt on me. Yeah, I know. I know he jerks off.

I know he jerks off. What's the joke from the 4-year-old version? I've dirted off twice since I've been here. Really? Yeah. When was the last time you cranked one out? No, it's okay. Wait, are you actually mere questions?

No, I'm an asking Chris. When you were eating your sandwich. Wow! The Lexi's men. He did call for the bathroom break. Oh my god, you guys are failing. Are you sure you should have done a comedy website? Maybe you could do a quip website.

You could never claim to be funny. Maybe you should do, you had to be a funny bartender website. Ha ha ha ha ha. I did it. What are you staring at? You fucking low blood sugar and cocksuckers. Why you gotta bring bartenders into this?

What, you're not a bartender? Maybe I know a lot of them. And maybe they're good people. Yeah, really? I'm gonna mix a drink and hit you with it. It sounds delicious. Yeah. Ah.

Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. All right, listen, we're gonna get the fuck out of here. You guys, thank you so much for coming by. You have fun. You guys are the best. You like the new studio? It's the right kids. It's fucking cool, right? It's a little more comfortable hang.

That's what we're on. It's in your house. Yeah, which was fun, but this is the shit. It's going to get bigger. We're getting even bigger. We got a big announcement coming out on the riot cast network. The riot cast. You're in the riot.

You're in the riot. But we're going to do a little tech talk right now and get the fuck out of it. We need to videotape this. Yep. Do you want a video tape it? Oh, who's you videotape it? Here we go. This is the new thing on tech talk.

We videotape it. We put it in with the video. We're actually going to give you, you're going to do the video this week. Do you take video at all? No, because you said. Right. You have a video, right? You're going to put it out it out we were gonna give it to

you if you wanted to we do we're gonna so you put it out and we're gonna put it out on the actual right cast you put it out and then we're gonna add this on the end of it okay yeah all right so so here we go we're gonna do a little uh uh Bobby and friends hang on you guys didn't do it right it's okay really what do you think we're we're an avenue cue Not a fucking you you think we're in wicked there you go ready you think we're in Lion King Hey you think we're in fucking morals Are you guys ready we're gonna do it all? We're gonna do a little tech talk with Bobby and friends.

Keep it. Today we're gonna be talking about the, this is, this, I, man, I've had my eye on this. It's called, I'm getting to it. Fucking teasing you, fucking ass. I punch up All right, here we go. No, you don't this is from blue microphone This is called the teaky it's and fucking no now, you know, I go to gizmodo I go to engage and I got all these sites all the time and this fucking thing is Not only this is what I love about technology and when somebody does a gadget right is they make it sexy

They make it sleek they condense it they fucking micro this thing Is this thing all those things you just said all those things and more And more This this is this is basically from blue microphone. It's a new USB mic slides right in. It can't be any bigger than fucking maybe three inches long an inch across and maybe an inch wide. Okay, but it's fucking badass. It's a mic that goes into USB and it is pretty impressive. First of all, it has a VoIP, okay, which is- What was it? What is a VoIP? A VoIP.

VoIP is over internet protocol? Yes. And here's the deal, too. It hasn't been released yet. There you go, buddy. Here's the thing, too. It cancels the background noise. So now when you're doing Skype, which I do a lot of interviews for, I do a lot of

podcasting. When I call to a podcast and I taught you this you can use that yeti microphone It sounds like you're in the room. You use your computer microphone to Skype you're you're fucking idiot Okay, cuz you're gonna sound like shit on the other end You're gonna sound like a little bitty microphone You put one of these blue microphones a USB microphone into your computer You're gonna sound like you're on a phone But a house phone not a cell phone and you're gonna sound like you're on a phone, but a house phone, not a cell phone,

and you're gonna sound like you're in the studio with the people you're calling into. And this, this new one, this teaky is the fucking shit. Okay? I love you doing this. What else? Which one is this? I can't stand you. I really hate you.

I fucking hate you. How's this? I'm going to read a little bit. Okay, here's this. As we increasingly rely on our computers for online calls, both for work and fun. It becomes obvious how easy background noise in poor intelligible can ruin your conversation. Okay, Tiki was designed with noise cancelling technology. What noise cancelling technology. Never before used in a microphone to ensure that your message, not your surroundings, is delivered loud and clear.

Wow, duh! And clear. How? I don't say that. to the forefront while it's patented pending technology that's patented pending technology reduces background noise. Uh-huh. Computer fans, keyboard typing and other unwanted sounds like. Tell me about it.

Tell me about it. Oh, how many times. what are you doing? Nothing? Doesn't sound like nothing. Just a dog drinking out of a bowl. And here's the best part about this. No cables, motherfucker. Cable free. No, there's no line from it going into the computer it goes right into the fucking USB BOOM! You got your fucking tiki dude you got your fucking sound kids surrounded Get your bovino!

I don't know why I wanted to say that and as well just to the bovino This fucking tiki thing right now is CD quality sound That's the best part about it. If you use Skype if you use your computer This thing and it fits in your pocket it fits in your pocket I can plug in anywhere plug it in anywhere any USB this mo fucka plugs into and I say mo fuck. I mean mo fucka Teaky blue microphone boom this I'm gonna I'm gonna actually use it this week I'm gonna come back with another review on this next week let you let you know the thumbs up all the thumbs way up Because I know it's not gonna be a thumbs down. It can't be it's gonna be a thumbs. It's gonna be all those features

Right here, so I'm gonna actually and I get a few other things coming up in tech doc that is very interesting No presence But soon soon soon we love to give presents. Yeah, there's one thing the fucking these guys love it. There's nothing better They're the swag kings Get back greatest gift bag of ever received. Ever, ever, ever. And you know what? South by Southwest, almost unbelievable. We need to do another live show.

Yeah, it's brilliant. Yeah. We need to know, oh, you know what, do show. Yeah. We need to do another one in Cali, we'll be on it. Yeah. And we need to fucking, you know, we need to do that again. That was a lot of fun, except for the fucking one-eyed,

fucking, shingle sound guy. One arm, one arm, dude. Oh, god. You know, I get angry, I get angry quick, but it's for good reasons in this cuck-sucker. The best, I mean, literally, we all work so hard. One hand, too. One hand, one eye, didn't fucking hear record. What?

You do. It's stressful two hours a month. Yeah, it's very stressful. No. Not for you, you had to bend through it enough. You called me and I rolled over and I was like, yeah, it's Bobby. He's not calling me with bad news That's a great outlook on life. You're gonna love both these guys very positive people Seriously, because we're not comedians. Nah, well you work with us, which is fucking harder But that's it right there Tiki Tiki from blue from Blue microphone, brand fucking new, check it out.

You use USB, get this. Boom. Bang. That was Tech Talk with Bobby and Finn. And that is the podcast for this week. Let's go around the room. I'm Chris Ellis. What?

Promote something. Promote your shit, motherfucker. All right, so I do listen to the show. I got, check out. I got. Back. Go. All right, so, I think you can listen to the show. I got this. I got this. I got this. All right, check out the left button.com. Like this is the law.

On Facebook and World Flare. What are you pointing at me? Both of the left button, the left button.com, go to the website. There are a lot of interviews coming up. A lot of interviews. Adam Krola. Adam Krola. Godfrey.

Godfrey. Paul of Tompkins. What did you do Godfrey for? Did you do a tour up in Canada? We did a little Q&A with him about it. Oh good, that's for you? Oh, you're not too open Canada. We did a little little Q and A with them. Oh, good. That's a great tour. Yeah. Yeah. I love I love I was in October. I fucking love those guys. I did it too.

The you'll do it someday. Kelly. Maybe you too. You go up to just for last. Fucking awesome tour. I love just for laughs. I love all those. Be Robby. So Robby is unbelievable. So what's your do you do in the city get to? What's the syndic's Twitter? The syndicate com T H E S Y and I like following you guys you put a lot of good stuff out there

The syndicate is loads of and and laugh button does too. Yeah, the left button dot com We're on Twitter at the left button. We're on Facebook at the left Yeah, make sure you fucking follow these guys guys are really supporters of funny funny people Kelly, what do you got? of funny, funny people. Kelly, what do you got? I'm following me on Twitter, K-L-O-I-F-E-S-T-U-C-A, and I've got a show twice a month, first and third of every month,

Tuesday, in that Queens at the Courtyard A-L House, 9 o'clock, off the floor, you're still. I'm in the middle. Dan, get off your phone. Dan, we're going to my calendar. I don't give a fuck what you lookin' at. How's the show? There's no fucking phones.

Fine. Don't find me. Don't you get that fuckin' face off. Yeah, Dan gives me shit that I give the big-eyed looks when I want to get in trouble. Look at him. He does every time I see him. Look at that dumb face.

I can't yell at him. Look at him. When he puts his arms in between his dumb face. I can't I had him look at him when he does the thing when he puts his arms between his legs like that Yeah, he does age himself 20 years too look at the squinty eyes Oh, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, let me make shut up. Good. What else you got? So that's off the 40th stop with the seven at the courtyard and hearts and queens I host a show every person third Could you fucking Jesus Christ speed it up? What else you got? The show is a stand-up is a stand-up I host the show. Oh cool. Yeah

Thanks, we have great people and not me. I would be embarrassed asking you Okay, good just making sure you're on point. Okay, Dan. What do you got besides fucking Go Bobby do it. What do you got? August 29th what show do you want to promote that why don't you put on a show? I know got ahead August 29th Nashville Zaini's gonna be with the sniper Nate Bargazzi. Yeah, really? Yeah He's gonna be back this weekend. Awesome. And then September?

Yeah. Fucking, come on son. 13th through the 15th, what's going to levity live and see me open up for a ball. Gabby Coway! Oh, we there? Yeah, shit. Yep.

All right, we'll check it out. I'm gonna be away for a while. I'm gonna be a way for a while. I'm going away for leaving Wednesday and going, but the show will be out after that. So they'll be in the past, so they won't even know that. But getting some, hopefully I don't have Lyme disease. No, I don't, I hate knock on wood. Knock on wood. I don't think you do. And hopefully my tall fungus goes away.

Just peeing on your feet in the shower. That's how I got it I got a from fucking some Asian lady peeing in a fucking bucket at a better place. This is sterile Your wife does that doesn't she doesn't do I might have doesn't do feet She's not fucking Asian I didn't marry a Korean legend. Hey, what hey? Accurate what Dance getting tired. We're all tired. We went to wait for you now.

I'm going to go do a spot. I got to fucking go home. I got to fucking do all the way to. I got to do a real radio show tomorrow. Thanks. I'm sorry. All right, right, right. So here's the deal.

Absolutely correct. God fucking bless America. God bless you. Go to robbercallylive.com. Go to iTunes, get my app, my award winning app. Make sure you go to iTunes and subscribe to this fucking show. And review it. Just fucking take two minutes out of your time and do that.

Use Amazon on our page, GameFly.com. Support all those people that support us. You guys are fucking fantastic. For listening to this damn show that we put on every week for you, you guys are the best. Thank you for spreading the word and we'll see you next time. You know what I'm getting? I'm stuck in the block, stuck in the block, the block You know what I'm getting? I'm just prox, I'm just prox, I'm just prox You know what I'm getting?

Really, really, really, really You know what I'm getting? Don't stop filming my face. Don't stop filming my face. Don't stop. Don't stop.