rSlash - r/AITA for Attacking a Disabled Woman?

Episode Date: November 3, 2023

0:00 Intro 0:08 Injured 6:10 Burned it down 7:40 Too personal 10:41 Money 14:35 Tip money Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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by March 29, 2024. Choose one of the eight eligible charities of $500,000 in total contributions. Welcome to R-Slash. Am I the butthole? Where OPs family completely ignores her after she suffers a traumatic accident? Am I the butthole for not letting my mother-in-law and father-in-law help me with the baby after the reaction to me being injured? I'm a 21-year-old woman, and I have a seven-month month old son with my boyfriend. My family lives abroad and they're coming over to stay and help during Christmas time. For now, my mother-in-law and father-in-law are helping me with the household stuff in the baby. They're both in their 60s named Deborah and Bob.

So far, we haven't had any real issues and they've been a massive help. About three weeks ago, I fell down the stairs. I wasn't holding the baby and the baby was safe. However, instead of helping me, Deborah and Bob both jumped up to comfort the baby who was crying and left me at the bottom of the stairs. My legs were fine, but I was wobbly because of the shock and I asked one of them to help me up. After nearly 10 whole minutes of being ignored, I managed to stand up on my own and hobble through to the living room.

I sit down and Deborah says, what happened to you? Are you okay? I'll admit, I saw red. I just said, I fell down the stairs. Didn't you hear me calling for help? Deborah's eyes widened and she said that she was too busy fussing over the baby.

After an hour, my arm was swelling up and I had to be taken to the hospital. Luckily, it was nothing serious and recovery time would be quick. After my boyfriend got home and his parents left, I told him that I no longer want their help after today's events. I can manage on my own, even though it'll be hard. He was taken a bag and said that they've done a lot for us. I said that I appreciated that, but they ignored me crying and calling them for 10 minutes after I fell down the stairs.

They don't care about me, only the baby, and I was embarrassed that I didn't see it sooner. My husband called his parents to let them know that we don't need their help anymore, and his dad said, is it about today? We really didn't hear her. He just told them they're invited to Sunday roast this week, and that's all. I could tell that he was unhappy about my decision, but he said that he went along with it because I'm the mother. Fast forward to Sunday, and my brother-in-law and sister-in-law are guests as well.

My sister-in-law has a three-year-old, and she's totally on my side, but my brother-in-law is not. He told me to be grateful for his parent's support because they're significantly more well-off than my parents are, and they paid for many of the baby expenses and planned to pay for many more as the baby grows. Since then, Debra keeps calling asking if we need any help and says that she feels awful not seeing the both of you and that she misses the baby. Am I the butthole for not wanting them helping me in my day to day life? Okay, let's put on our Sherlock Holmes hat here and get our pipe, an inter-detective mode for a moment, and if we eliminate everything that is impossible, then whatever's left

no matter how improbable must be the truth. Your in-laws say that they didn't hear you fall and they didn't hear you cry out for help. And yet, your baby did. We know this because the baby was crying inconsolably. So then, would it not stand to reason that if the baby could hear you falling and screaming, then could not also your in-laws as well? Would that not lead us to conclude that they did hear you fall?

They did hear you cry, but they just chose to ignore you because they're selfish people. You know, this makes me think, I feel like every single person on Earth has like probably eight to 10 TikToks or Reddit clips or whatever in their brain that they just think about every now and then.

And those TikToks change your perspective of reality, or they represent some formative foundational way that you think about the world. And every time that situation comes up, you just go back to that TikTok, and you're like, wow, exactly like the TikTok. This reminds me of one of my foundational TikToks. It's this clip that security home footage inside of the house,

so it's facing the family room and the kitchen. And somehow, I don't know how. The father falls through the ceiling of the kitchen and lands on the kitchen floor. It's painful, it's loud, and in the foreground, there's obviously the wife and the baby. So the wife and the toddler rush over to see what happens, and then the baby starts crying. And the wife, oh my god, this f**king wife fucking wife you guys the wife picks up the baby and goes over to the sofa and comforts the crying baby instead of going to comfort her husband who just fell through the roof into the kitchen lady where there's pots and knives and sharp corners everywhere that's really your priority, comforting tier. Oh, boo, who I'm scared.

Rather than you're potentially dying, you're potentially paralyzed, you're potentially life-endangered husband. Lady, there's a thing called triage. If there's multiple emergencies, you deal with the biggest emergency first. And the biggest emergency is, did my husband fall onto a knife and he's bleeding out on the kitchen floor. Not, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, is not my wife. So OP, I guess all that is just to say that I am super super on your side. I am more on your side than normal because people who put crying babies over the general well-being and safety of someone who's gone through a potentially life-destroying injury is just unforgivably selfish. If I were you OP, I would never feel safe around my in-laws again.

I would honestly be asking myself, do they want me to die? Did they actually think this was their chance to be rid of you? That maybe if they just let you bleed out on the stairs for long enough, then finally 10 hours later when they come to you, they're like, oh no, she's dead. We didn't even know.

We were just caring for the baby. Oh, sad, we're so sad. We're so sad. Oh, I guess we'll have to be here all the time to care the baby. We're so sad about that. So, OP, I'm giving you zero out of five buttolls. I'm giving your in-laws honest to God. I'm giving them 4.5 out of five buttolls. Am I the buttoll for telling my son that the village you wanted doesn't exist because you burnt it to the ground? This is a bit complicated. I'm a stepmom to five wonderful kids. I became their stepmom when the oldest was 9 years old.

I adopted all of them except for one, Nick. He never wanted me to be his mom, which is fine. The moment he turned 18, he made it very clear that he doesn't care about me at all. I wasn't invited to his wedding or any holidays if he was hosting. My last straw was when he told me that he would come to Christmas that I was hosting if I left. So we're now very low contact. Along with that, he's blown up every relationship he has with his siblings.

He now has two daughters and he called me up. This was a surprise and we started talking. After a while, he started complaining about not getting any help to raise the kids. He asked me to watch them on Sunday and to step up as a grandparent. He said that it takes a village to raise a kid. I told him the reason the village doesn't exist to raise his kids is due to him burning that village down. He called me a jerk and hung up.

My husband is iffy on the situation, but told me that it's my call since I'd be the one to watch the kids most of the time since he travels often for work. So I'm posting this here to Reddit. Now, Opie, I'm on your side. This post is the definition of your reap what you sow. You get 0 out of 5 buttholes and I'm giving your steps on 2.5 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole? A woman demanded info on my condition, so I asked her extremely personal questions. I'm a 49 year old woman and I was at the state fair yesterday. This woman near me came over and demanded info about my medical condition. Long story short, I'm

paralyzed from roughly the braw band down. I use a power wheelchair and have a service dog. I normally don't mind educating people about paralysis, access issues, and chatting about my dog. But this woman, my dudes, she was rude, abrasive, and demanding. She acted like she was entitled to my personal medical history. She didn't even ask politely, she just demanded to know how it happened, what the results were, if I tried X, Y, and Z treatments, you name it. What? She even wanted to know about my love life? Seriously? Who asked this

stuff of a literal stranger who's just eating delicious fair food at the table area? So I smiled as politely as I could manage, and this is where I may have been the butthole. I started to ask her about her most recent OB-GYN visit. Were the stirrups too high? Did she have to do that awkward, shimmy slash scoot down the table? Was the Speculum cold? Did the pap smear hurt?

The usual. If she felt entitled to my answers, I should be entitled to hers, right? Well, she threw an absolute effing fit. Started screaming and yelling that I was gross and a pervert and on and on and on. A group tried to calmer down and one of them told me that I should have just been polite and answered her questions. As far as I could tell, the angry Karen wasn't mentally disabled in any way. She didn't have a carer or a minder. She had been with a group of friends who had been carrying on normally until she saw me. I had approached their table, asked if the space was free, and set up at the end of their table because my chair fits neatly on the end of one of these picnic benches. I told the group that if that woman went

in my personal and private medical information, then she should trade info for info. Two of the people called me buttolls when they left, trying to calm down their nearly hysterical friend. She was still screaming and shouting that I was a pervert, slash cruel, slash mean. People were staring at me and I hated it. At the time, I felt good for finally finding a shiny, new, but still broken spine and standing up for myself.

So to speak, I was talking to friends last night, and they said that I was the butthole that I could have politely told her that I wasn't going to tell her. I tried to tell my friends that she came over demanding answers, not even asking for them. So Reddit, am I the butthole here? Opie, I'm a big fan of returning energy, so if she approaches you with aggressive, rude, demanding energy, then you basically have a free pass to also approach her with aggressive, rude, demanding energy. Like, if someone's being rude to you, why are you obligated to be polite to them? Opie, you get zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving the weird lady here two out of five buttholes.

Am I the butthole for telling my parents that if they give my brother money, I'll stop giving them money? I'm a 32 year old woman and my 35 year old older brother is trash. He has multiple baby mamas and is a deadbeat. He's also the apple of my mom's eye. He can do no wrong and is just misunderstood. My parents are retired and are on a fixed budget. I do well for myself

and I help them out. I give them maybe 500 bucks a month to help with groceries and bills. Every once in a while I'll give them extra money for an unexpected expense. No questions asked. Recently my mom asked me for $2,000 and I sent it to her. Strangely enough, I ran into my brother at a family wedding that I had been told that he couldn't afford to attend because it was a destination wedding. Weird. But funny story, he actually missed the wedding itself because he hooked up with some random woman on an excursion and went to their resort. It was our cousin's wedding and my aunt was pissed.

She had to make special arrangements to get him included to the wedding since he only got the money last minute. She said that my mom shouldn't have given him the money if he wasn't even going to show up. Then she shut up after she saw the look on my face. I enjoyed the wedding and had a great time. When I got home, I went to see my parents. I asked my mom why she asked me for the $2,000.

She lied and said something for the house. I asked what for the house, but she couldn't say. I told her what my aunt said. I told her and my father that from now on, I wouldn't have received for any money I gave them. I said that I have no problem helping them, but I'll be damned if I worked my butt off for her to give my money to my piece of garbage brother. My mom started crying, and my dad said that I'm not a child, so I don't answer to him.

I agreed and walked out. I didn't talk to my parents for two months. My aunt called me yesterday and told me that my parents were thinking of going to the food banks since they didn't have any money. I said that I gave them $2,000 a couple of months ago, and that was more than my family of three spent on food during that time. She said that I knew damn well they'd given that money to my brother. I told her, well, then my brother should pay them back, and my aunt said that I was being a B word. Yo, what? Yo, the-ah! Guys, this pisses me off so

much. Every once in a while, you'll read that story where OP either gives money to a family member or they let a family member live in their house, and then some other family member calls them and say, how dare you withdraw that support? Well then you do it! Then you do it! Then why don't you do it? Hey, aunt, are you really worried that your sister has to go to the food bank? Then you do it! These people pissed me off.

It's hard for me to relate to this because I literally don't have a toxic relationship with any family member. I don't have a toxic relationship with any friends.. I don't have a toxic relationship with any friends. I just, like, we all just get along, fine. So it's so weird to me that people can act like this, the people you love. I can't imagine my mom manipulating me like this,

or just, I don't know, I'm just, I guess I'm just lucky when it comes to family. So I have a really hard time sympathizing with these people. So, Opie, I'm on your side and all, but I do have to warn you that your receipt strategy is really dumb, because if you get them $500 and you say, hey, give me receipts for those $500 and they show you $500 or groceries or whatever, then they can still just use their other money

to spend on your brother. So, OP, I think the ship has sailed. I just really don't know how you could support them without the money, somehow in one form or another trickling down to your older brother. OP, you could zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving the rest of your family 2.5 out of five buttholes. I'd be pissed too many. You basically spent $2,000 for your brother to go get his dick wet at some exotic location. Am I the butthole for firing our family therapist after she asked for tips? My ex and I have a 12 year old boy who's going through some issues. We found a therapist and we've been seeing

her for a couple of years. It hasn't been life changing for me in any way. In fact, it felt more like a pointless chore like making your bid or folding your underwear. I might have gotten a few things out of it, but I would not do it again. A few weeks ago, I told our therapist that it's bizarre to not have to worry about money for the first time in my life. I make good money, and I don't have many bills. I'm saving like a thousand dollars a month. Last week, the therapist asked me if I could start making a co-payment. I don't have a co-payment because my insurance covers 100% of therapy sessions. I explained that to her. She said that that was true, but that maybe I could start paying like 20 bucks cash because

she's not making a lot with what my insurance pays her, so like a tip. I was at a loss for words. I said, and I suppose this has no relation to my telling you that I had disposable income a few weeks ago, and she said, of course not. It was like she was asking for a raise, lol. I said that I'd think about it. I found nothing online about tipping your therapist. I talked to my ex and said that I was firing the therapist.

She told me not to throw away two years of work, and I said the therapist tried to take advantage of me. My ex offered to pay, and I said that I'm not stopping you, but I'm not doing the sessions anymore and neither is our son. The trust I had in our therapist is forever broken. I left a voicemail and text message explaining that we weren't in need of services anymore. I haven't heard back. And guess what, our lives didn't fall apart and the therapist replied that I totally misunderstood

this whole tip thing. Did you, did you misunderstand? It sounds pretty straightforward to me. She found out that you had extra money and she thought, oh, maybe I could get some of that extra money. It's scummy, unprofessional, and I think firing her is fully justifiable. Opie, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 butoles, and I'm giving her, I don't know, I guess 0.5 out of five buttholes,

what she did wasn't really a jerk move, it's just unprofessional. That was our slash in my The Butthole, and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day. single day.