rSlash - r/AITA For Becoming a Karen to Treat Mexicans a Lesson?

Episode Date: July 31, 2023

0:00 Intro 0:06 Forced hair cut 6:45 200 dollar steak 9:29 Karen behavior 12:06 Owe me mentality Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Holt Renfrew is sharing joy for the holidays with gifts for everyone on your list, and maybe even a special treat for yourself, too. Discover the new collection for Burberry by Daniel Lee. Add some ambiance with Louis V. Home. Give Gorpkora try and Solomon Sneakers, and so much more. Whatever presence you pick, we know they're going to love them. Visit a store today or shop at HoltRenfrew.com. Welcome to R-Slash.

Am I the butthole? Where OP emotionally abuses her stepdaughter? Am I the butthole for forcing my stepdaughter to cut her hair? I'm a 31-year-old woman, and I met my husband, who's 34, 8 years ago. We've been married for 6 years. He has an 11-year-old daughter from a previous relationship. I work from home, so I mainly end up taking care of her. I have since she was young. We have a generally good relationship. She stays at her mother's for

most weekends. She has incredibly long blonde, wavy hair just past her bottom. It's a nightmare to take care of. It frequently tangles, and she always needs help brushing and styling it before school. I'm not a morning person, and I don't like having to wake up early to do a kid's hair. It's expensive to maintain,

as she requires more products. She insists on using hair oils, which can cost around $11, and only last a few weeks. She also insists that she has to use curly hair shampoo instead of regular shampoo and conditioner which is often over $10 per bottle. Also she goes through it at a fast rate. She won't use a regular brush on it and she insists that it breaks her hair and hurts

her so she uses a wide tooth comb which takes a long time to brush. When she could be doing other more productive things such as homework or helping me with chores. I decided that she's become obsessed with her hair and I don't want her to become vain, so I decided that it needs to be cut. I don't see it as a big deal as I've always had shoulder length hair as my hair doesn't grow very fast and I get frequent trims. It's a lot more practical.

I took her to the hairdressers as normal. In the car on the way down, she said that she wants to make sure the hairdresser doesn't cut too much. I politely explained that I would like her to cut her hair to shoulder length because her hairs become a burden. At first she thought that I was joking, but when she realized I wasn't, she started to cry. When we got to the salon, the hairdresser was reluctant to cut her hair due to the tears. But I explained the trouble that we have maintaining it, and I assured that cutting it would be best for her. In the end, the stylist agreed and cut her hair. The stylist braided her hair, then cut it.

My stepdaughter kept the lock of braided hair that was cut off. Her hair is now just past shoulder length and looks a lot darker. The car journey home was silent. I offered her McDonald's, but she refused. She went straight to her room when we got back. My husband went up to see her when he got home, and apparently found her on her bed sobbing holding her old hair. My husband immediately called her mother to come and collect her and as soon as my stepdaughter was out the door he started yelling. Her mother also came in and gave me a mouthful.

I explained my reasoning but my husband wouldn't budge. He said that if I had an issue he would have done her hair in the morning and that he doesn't mind paying for the products. He was so furious and said that he no longer trust me around his daughter, and he doesn't know if he can be with a woman who he doesn't trust with her. This broke my heart. I didn't mean or any harm, I was just so tired and I'm trying to reduce stress. I've always been the one to raise her and her brother, and I'm just exhausted. Am I the butthole? Yeah, you're super, super clearly the butthole here.

Opie, I'm just so tired and I'm trying to reduce stress. Reduce who stress exactly? Reduce your step-daughter stress? Because it sounds like you increased her stress. Reduce your husband's stress because again, he seems more stressed in the beginning of this story. Reduce your stress? Ah, I think that's what's going on here. You just want to reduce your stress OP. You said you're so tired and exhausted. Honestly OP, how much time and energy can possibly go into taking care of a girl's hair? I have a girl. I have a two-year-old girl. we have to brush her hair and put her hair up into ponytails and bathe her and it's not that big of a deal, it's really not OP.

The real red flag in this post is it's super, super clear. Just how much this 11 year old girl absolutely loves her hair. And your response is, yeah, but it's a burden, so let's secretly cut it off without consulting either one of her parents. Super super rude super rude OP oh man this is oh okay it's so wild to me that the random woman at the salon who cuts the girl's hair is more concerned about this girl's well-being than her own stepmother.

OP, you're kind of given Disney evil stepmother vibes if I'm being honest with you. Okay, so personally, I'm not sure if everyone else will agree with me. Personally I consider this emotional abuse. To tell a young girl that part of her body is a burden and it has to be removed, I think that's emotional abuse. So you guys might think that my rating here is a little bit harsh, but personally I'm giving her a 4 out of 5 butthole score because this is super toxic. OP, you DO deserve your husband divorcing you, and if I was in his position, I wouldn't

trust you around my daughter either. I know, I actually have a similar experience myself. When my daughter was born, she had a full head of hair. It was fairly long for a baby. And so when she was really young, just like, I don't know, six or seven months old, my wife cut her hair a little bit, just like, while she was watching the baby and I was doing work. And when I saw my child, my precious baby, getting a haircut. And so when I saw my precious child

who had gotten a haircut without me knowing about it, it was like an instant dagger to the heart. And my wife immediately read my facial expression. She was like, oh no, I should have asked you before I did this, shouldn't I? And I was like, yeah, I really wish you had. And I don't really blame her. I wasn't really upset with her because, you know,

she's just a six month old baby. So we're still learning like what our boundaries and expectations are with how we treat the baby. That's just a, but that's just a six month old baby. And that's the mother of the child who got the hair. And I was so wounded when she did it in that like very minor circumstance. So this is an 11 year old, not a six month old,

which makes it twice as worse. And then the 11 year old, not a six month old, which makes it twice as worse. And then the 11 year old cried and begged you not to do it, which makes it twice as worse. And then you didn't consult either of the parents, which makes it twice as worse. And then it's all about you, about you, instead of about what the kid ones, which again makes it twice as worse. And it just, it's so bad. Okay, calm down. Sorry. I think I'm a little bit protective of little girls if I'm being honest with you. So I think this post got me a little bit fired up. Opie, you get four out of five buttholes. I hope he leaves you. Am I the butthole for making my brother-in-law pay for his son's meal after I said that it was my treat?

I don't see my sister and her family very often. So when I do, I tend to splurge on them. I'm child-free for now in the foreseeable future, but probably not forever. I took her family out to dinner and I said that it was my treat. So it was my sister, her husband, his mom who lives with them, myself, and three kids aged 15, 12, and 10. I took them out to a stake place in their city that I've always wanted to try. My 15-year-old nephew looks at the menu and says that he wants the Tomahawk steak.

I said that's 3 pounds of meat plus 3 full sides and he should probably pick something smaller. My brother-in-law said, don't worry, my Kate can eat it all and you said that it was your treat so are you trying to cheap out? By the way, the Tomahawk steak is 190 bucks. I said fine, but if he doesn't eat it all, then you have to pay for it. He agreed. We order, and the waiter tells us that the Tomahawk steak is usually shared between several

people since it comes with three shareable portions of sides as well. I ask my brother-in-law, are you sure? He looks at the kid, smiles, and says, no problem." We ordered, and when the food came out, the Tomahawk and sides took up half the table. The kid finishes less than a quarter of the steak and only a little bit of the sides. When the bill came, I asked to pay for the seven meals, all the drinks, and the tip. I asked for the Tomahawk steak to be on a separate bill for my brother-in-law. He paid angrily.

My sister said that he used the budget that they had earmarked to take the family to see the new Spider-Man movie. I felt bad, but I think that he was the butthole for trying to waste my money. He thinks that I'm the butthole for following through and making him pay for something that mostly went to waste. Yes, they took the leftovers home. Okay, so basically what happened here, this is a, okay, here's a parallel. The parallel is you go and you pay for all their meals and then after the meal, the brother

and the law is like, hey, can I get like $150 worth of extra meals to go? OPs paying for them by the way. And OPs like, no, no I'm not. I said I'd pay for your meals, not $150 worth of leftovers. Also even then, even if the kid could finish $190 worth of food, which obviously he can't. He shouldn't have ordered that in the first place. This brother-in-law, instead of receiving O's generosity with grace, thought to himself, awesome! How can I exploit OP to the maximum dollar value?

What a dumb jerk, man! OP, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving your brother-in-law 1.5 out of 5 buttholes. Holt Renfrew is sharing joy for the holidays with gifts for everyone on your list, and maybe even a special treat for yourself, too. Discover the new collection for Burberry by Daniel Lee. Add some ambiance with Louis V. Home. Give Gorpkora a try in Solomon's sneakers, and so much more.

Whatever presence you pick, we know they're going to love them. Visit a store today or shop at HoltRenFrew.com So you think you know sports? Visit a store today or shop at HoltRenfrew.com. So you think you know sports? Points vet is the sportsbook for you because we've got the features for true competitors. Like live, same game parlays. Use your sportsmarts to make pics live on the players and teams you're watching. And qualified bets can use our early cashout feature.

So you can take your winnings to play live blackjack on the same points bet at. The platform that gives you everything you need. You know what to do. Bet on it. Point Spets Sportsbook and Casino. Am I the butthole for ruining a child's birthday party and getting the parents in trouble? I'm a 32 year old man and I live in an apartment complex with a pool. There's no active lifeguard or anyone really monitoring it like most apartment pools.

On Saturday, my boyfriend and I went to hang out at the pool around 2pm. We get there and it's packed like way too packed. I knew this couldn't all be residents. There were maybe 25 to 30 Hispanic people with beer. They had glass bottles of Madelo, which is a double rule break for both the alcohol and the glass. They had loud music and they were also using both of the grills on the patio. After investigating further, it looked like one of the small families that I've seen

around the complex was having a birthday party for their kid. Our complex technically has a rule that all non-residents must be checked in at the office to use the pool, but there's no way they enforce this, and nobody really pays attention to that rule. But a whole birthday party, the entire pool was filled with kids. It doesn't specifically say no parties, but it says be respectful of other spaces and not to hog items like the grills, hot tubs, and umbrella tables. My boyfriend and I tried to lay out in the corner, but it wasn't working.

After another couple told us how displeased they were with this party too, my boyfriend suggested we say something. We left and stopped by the front office and told them about the party. About an hour later, we started seeing all of them leaving the pool. It looked like the party was shut down. This morning, we got a note on our door from the host of the party. I don't know how they knew it was us or what unit we lived in, but that's besides the points. The note called us buttholes for what we did, and they said they're under lease review where the office could decide to evict them if they wanted to. So, they thanked us for potentially getting a poor, small family kicked out. I said that we weren't the only ones who had a problem, and if we didn't do it, then

they would have eventually gotten caught. I also told them that whatever happens is their own fault for blatantly breaking the rules. Am I the butthole? Opie, you sound like a major Karen. What's the real issue here? That a community member was using a communal space for their party, just like you could have if you wanted to? Using two grills isn't hogging the grills, it's using the grills.

This is just super-carron behavior, OP. I'm giving you two out of five buttholes. I'm giving the other family zero out of five buttholes. I don't understand how you can say that everyone ignores these rules, but then when they break the rules, suddenly it has to be stopped. Am I the butthole for expecting to meet my grandchild? I'm a 42 year old man and my 18 year old son, Jay, is having a baby with his girlfriend Kate, who's also 18. I'll be honest in saying that I don't think they're ready for this. They've been together for less than a year, but she's

doing July. Obviously, I know that this kind of thing happens, so we're doing our best to embrace it. I'm excited to meet this new little person. Anyways, Kate's family is uninvolved. They honestly weren't great parents to begin with. But when they found out about the pregnancy, they kicked their 17 year old daughter onto the streets. My son and her were living with me until two weeks ago when they got their first apartment. I'm extremely proud of them. We had a room set up for the baby, but since they got their own place, I let them take all the baby items I purchased.

I mean a fully furnished nursery, so that baby isn't going to be wanting for much. Well, the baby was breach. They tried everything to get that baby to turn, but nothing. So they had a C-section scheduled for July 3rd, assuming the baby doesn't flip and she goes into labor. I requested this day off work, and then I asked my son and Kate if they would like me to pick them up or if they planned to have my son drive them. My son was confused and told me that he would drive them. Why would I drive them? I told him I was just offering, and I told him I'd be in the waiting room waiting for her

to get out of surgery. Then Kate jumped in and said they weren't having any visitors at the hospital. She said she needed time to heal, and they wanted to bond with the baby. She said that it would just be the two of them and her sister. I'll admit, I was pretty taken aback. I mean, I feel like as the grandparent, I'm closer than the aunt, but whatever. I said okay, but I didn't want to fight, and I said that I'd be waiting at their house. Kate jumped back in and said the only visitor they would be having was her older sister.

She said that she would be in pain, bleeding, and trying to breastfeed, and that she wanted privacy to do that. She also said that I never got my TDAP booster shot, so I couldn't come until the baby had its first shots or I got the shot. I pointed out to her that if she didn't have a vaginal birth then she wouldn't be bleeding. And it would just be a surgery recovery and she could stay in the bedroom and relax and my son could bring her the baby when it's hungry. She told me, nobody is taking my newborn from me. Lots of other things were said and I

feel extremely taken advantage of. I sheltered and provided for her and my son when I didn't have to. Plus, I gifted them a lot. I now see a lot of other narcissistic tendencies from her and I feel like it's World War III with my poor boy caught in the middle. I don't feel like a butthole, but she and my son are saying that I am.

Am I the butthole? Opie, the vibe that I'm getting from this post is I bought things from my son, therefore they owe me. And the simple reality is that that's not the case. I mean, it's great that you're involved and that you care about everyone and you're helping out with the finances, but fundamentally at the end of the day, this is not your baby and it's super important that you understand that.

And okay, you feel like a grandparent is closer than the aunt, but the thing is, that's not up to you to decide. That's up to those two to decide. If they decide they don't want you there, then they don't want you there, man. Just respect that choice. So, Opie, I think you need to just take a step back and remind yourself, this is not your life,

this is not your family, this is not your kid. It's your job to be a grandparent, which means you step in when needed, but not whenever you want to. Still, I think that OP is really well-intentioned here. He just needs, you know, a reality check. So I'm going to go easy on him. I'm going to give him one out of five buttholes. I'm giving everyone else zero out of five buttholes. That was our slash of my The Butthole. And if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.

That was our slash of my The Butthole, and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.