rSlash - r/AITA For Crashing Out over Donuts?

Episode Date: August 29, 2026

0:00 Intro 0:05 Donuts 2:32 Wedding reception 6:09 Dress code 8:22 Tea 12:22 Allergy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Two and five Canadians will hear the words you have cancer. That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation Walk. Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at pmcfwalk.ca.ca. Welcome to R slash Am I the Butthole, where we have a justifiable murder situation. Am I the butthole for refusing to buy more donuts?

I was out early last Sunday morning and decided to grab some donuts from this fancy spot that I don't get to go to very often. I asked everyone what donuts they wanted, and I was willing to buy two for everyone. I grabbed all the donuts, eight total, and it was almost 40 bucks. I drove an hour home, put the donuts on the counter, and was exhausted from working. all night, so I went to bed. When I woke up that evening, I was so excited to have my donuts, only to open the box and find the two I picked out were gone. The ones that were left over were ones that other people in the household specifically requested. I didn't get angry. I was

mostly just disappointed, but it ruined my appetite for a donut. So I took them and put them in a Tupperware for later. I got ready and went to work. When I got home, I wanted something sweet, so I went for a donut only to find my Tupperware empty in the sink. So not only did I not get a donut that I wanted, I didn't get a donut at all. And I was left dishes to wash. I asked everyone and was told, Sorry, I thought because you left that you didn't want them. I was beyond disappointed.

This Sunday, I was out working and decided to stop and get myself a donut at the same shop. I got myself two donuts and ate them both on the ride home. I threw my trash into the trash can before I went inside and went to bed. When I woke up in the evening, I was questioned about where the rest of the donuts were because someone saw the packaging in the trash outside. I explained that I just grabbed some for myself this morning because I didn't get one last week. And I was called selfish and a butthole because if I was by the shop, I could have gotten some for everyone.

So am I the butthole for not dropping another 40 bucks on donuts for everyone? Oh, and I didn't even receive one thank you for getting the donuts the first time. O.P. Mass murder. This is the only justifiable outcome to the situation. You need to murder your three roommates, or whatever they are, and mount their heads on pikes for stealing your donuts and being ungrateful about the donuts you did give them. And then giving you dishes on top of that? Who are these people that you live with? Are they roommates, family members? This is an infuriating post.

Definitely justifiable homicide. In the comments, O.P. clarifies that everyone involved in this story is over the age of 25. Am I the butthole for leaving a wedding reception after the bride and groom had us drive to four different locations, over 30 miles through LA traffic in a hundred degree Fahrenheit heat? We went to a wedding on Saturday, and after the ceremony, which ended around noon, we were all given an address for the reception. We get there, and after we finished eating, the bride and grooms stand up and ask the guest to accompany them to the next location for the rest of the reception 12 miles away. Mind you, we're about 75 to 100 guests. We hit over where another meal was served, a main course of Mexican food, which was okay. After we finished eating, again, they stood up and

asked us to accompany them to the next location for the rest of the party. No dancing, no speeches, we just sat and ate. I expected it to be a hall with a dance. dance floor in the same building or something, but no, eight miles further taking us into downtown L.A. By now, it's 4 p.m. We've paid 12 bucks valet at Restaurant 1 and 18 bucks valet at Restaurant 2. Some of the guests were a little pissed off, but we all hit out and went. Took about 40 minutes to get there in traffic, and it was almost 100 degrees that day. We get to Restaurant 3. This time, desserts were served. 20 bucks for parking. The same thing happened. They got up and asked us to go to location 4 for the remainder of the evening,

and they didn't say what will be there. It was 30 miles away, like 30 miles further out from the main wedding ceremony and my home. At this point, I'm almost 60 miles away from home. I found out later that there was an open bar and a dance floor, and that was where the party was. At this point, I said my congrats and went home. It was. already 7 p.m., and we were sweaty from the extreme heat, overworked, and exhausted from all the driving. I found out yesterday that almost half the guests went home. Now I'm wondering if I did the wrong thing by leaving. I feel bad that they had to go to the main party without almost half their guests. I also understand that they wanted to do something different and memorable with their wedding,

but the driving around was just hectic. It felt inconsiderate to have almost a hundred guests driving from place to place, in L.A. traffic, just to eat at each location rather than actually celebrate together. And that's not even thinking about the $50 in ballet that we spent at the three places. I asked, and venue number four also had an $18 valet. Maybe I should have just sucked it up, driven the extra 30 miles, and stayed for the actual party. At the time, it was already 7 p.m., and we'd been doing this for basically the entire day. I would have just sat on a chair fanning myself with my feet up. O.P., I don't think you skipped out on a wedding.

I think you skipped out on a terrible scavenger hunt. Also, in the comments, people were asking my first question, which is, was this communicated beforehand? Did they say that this was going to be over four venues, or was it on the invitation? And O.P. says, not at all. They gave the address for the first venue only. When they announced the second location, they were both giggling and were intending it as a fun surprise for everyone.

God, I feel so bad, but if it was communicated, my friends and I would have carpooled and maybe continued the night. Yeah, okay, I'm definitely on your side, O.P. I don't know what they were thinking, I don't know how this is supposed to be fun, this just sounds exhausting. You get zero out of five buttholes. Am I the butthole for being upset that my wife forgot to tell me the wedding dress code? My wife was a bridesmaid in one of her close friends' weddings this weekend. She had been involved in the planning for months with dress fittings, rehearsals, group chats, and everything. else. I wasn't involved at all. I figured if there was anything important I needed to know, she would let me know. I got dressed in what I thought was appropriate and we hit it to the wedding. But as soon as we got there, I realized something was wrong. Every single man there was wearing a

black tuxedo with a bow tie. Not just the groom and groomsman. Every male guest. I was the only guy in a regular suit. I felt totally out of place. A couple of people joke that I must have missed the memo. They probably didn't mean anything by it, but it was still embarrassing. I stood out like a sore thumb. I asked my wife if she knew everyone was supposed to be in tuxedos. She just said, Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you, I was busy helping with the wedding prep. That honestly made me feel even worse. She had known about the dress code for a long time because she was in the bridal party and had been talking to the bride the whole time. If she had mentioned it, I would have rented a tux. Instead, I spent the whole night feeling self-conscious.

we got home, I told her I was upset. She said I was making a big deal out of nothing because nobody cared what I was wearing and that I should just laugh it off. I told her it wasn't really about the tucks. It was about the fact that she knew, I did not, and she never thought to tell me. It would have taken five seconds to mention it and it would have saved me from feeling embarrassed. Now she thinks I'm overreacting, but I feel like my frustration is justified. You know, O.P., you are right. It would have taken her five seconds to tell you. It also would have taken you five seconds to ask, Hey, is there a dress code? Has that crossed your mind? You're an adult, O.P. Before you go to a wedding, you're supposed to check, you know, the invitation, what day is it, what time is it? What's

the dress code? Do you need to bring a gift? These are detailed you're supposed to figure out, you dofus? So I guess they both deserve one out of five buttholes. Yeah, the wife should have told him, but also he should have asked. Am I the butthole for not getting my daughter-in-law coffee because she hates tea? This feels really stupid, and I need to know if I'm the problem here or not. My son seems to think that I'm the problem. My daughter-in-law loves coffee. She's the type of person who will go get coffee every morning.

It's not uncommon that if she goes out to get coffee, she'll pick up coffee for other people as well. The issue is that she will never get me tea or any tea lattes. As she puts it, it's leaf water, and she doesn't want to waste her money on it. I'm asking her to get a $5 cup of tea if she's already picking up everyone else $8 fancy coffees. I'm just asking for a tea latte or an iced tea that I literally can't make at the time. So she comes back with everyone's drink, but mine. It's really frustrating on trips because I'll be driving most of the time. She'll take everyone's orders and goes in while I'm either getting gas,

or snacks for the trip and come back without any caffeine for me. Then I have to go into the shop to get my own drink. There have been so many times she asked in the chat if anyone wants something at Starbucks. I tell her what I want and then she comes back with everyone's drink but mine. Talking to her doesn't help. She just claims I can make tea at home. So as for the issue, I was going over to babysit the grandkids from my son and daughter, so four adults.

I sent a text saying that I was a text saying that I was stopping at Starbucks and ask if they wanted anything. This is the exact same thing she does. They gave me their orders and I decided that I wouldn't get my daughter-in-law her drink to make a point, basically. I get to where everyone was and gave everyone there a drink besides my daughter-in-law. She was pissed and I pointed out this is the same thing she does with me all the time. She told me it wasn't the same and I can make tea at home. I told her to make her coffee. I told her to make her coffee at home and the pot was right there. We got into a fight and my son told me to apologize and get her drink. I told him, no, I'm tired of this. I've spoken to them multiple times.

And if she doesn't change what she does, I'll never get her drink when I get drinks for others. They left, but after babysitting, I'm still hearing about it. I need your opinion. Oh, I like this idea. O.P. Next time, order a coffee and see what happens. Yeah, I don't. think this is a coffee versus tea thing. I think she's just snubbing you because she wants to snub you. It's honestly surprising to me that O.P.'s son doesn't understand that what his wife is doing is wrong. I mean, the wife obviously understands it because she's intentionally being mean. But this is just the clearest example of hypocrisy I've ever read in a Reddit post. Ooh, I like this line from affectionate tie. If someone doesn't like to be treated the same way they treat you, you can always be

confident that you're not the butthole. Yeah, that's basically the golden rule, but the way they phrased it here is quite interesting. Then, Opie posted an update. Well, I just got off the phone with my daughter-in-law and son. Yeah, they've seen this post. I sent it to them. My daughter-in-law apologized. This issue has nothing to do with me. I thought she just hated me, but this has to do with her own mother. They have a bad relationship, and when they married, she didn't wish for that type of relationship to happen again with me. It also didn't help that her sister has a horrible mother-in-law, so she thought she needed to be distant and cold off the start. So yeah, she was being rude on purpose. This post kind of opened her eyes that she was acting like her mother acts. My son also

apologized and realized he went too far in the direction of support your spouse. He admits he did the easy thing because we don't live together. I informed them that I won't put up with being disrespected anymore and hopefully nothing backtracks. We seem good now, but I have a feeling more talks will happen. Am I the butthole for refusing to move after my new roommate told me she's allergic to dogs? I'm a 21-year-old woman living in an on-campus apartment with three roommates. I'm legally blind and have a guide dog. Housing has known about my guide dog for years, and this will be my third year living in these apartments with her. Earlier this year, Housing moved me from one apartment building to another because my old building was being renovated. I didn't ask to move, and I was actually out of state

at a guide dog training when it happened. So my friends had to pack and move everything I owned. I've now been living in the new apartment for about two months. Everything is unpacked, including my mini-fridge, my guide dog's crate, and all of her supplies. I've also learned the new route to campus from this building. One of my roommates moved in a few days ago. I'd planned to go back and clean before she arrived, but I got a high fever and couldn't make it back. I emailed her, apologized, explained that I was sick, and asked her to leave my belongings where they were until I could return. She replied saying she's severely allergic to dogs.

I completely understand that allergies are serious, and I don't blame her for bringing it up. She suggested that I switch apartments with one of her friends in another building. The problem is, I'd already moved once this summer. Everything was unpacked, and I have a lot to move, including a mini-fridge, my guide dog's crate, and all of her supplies. Since I'm visually impaired, I'd also have to learn a completely new route to campus again. I also don't have the people available to help me move a second time.

I told her I honestly didn't think housing would move me again since they'd already relocated me once, but I would ask. She then emailed housing saying that she, her friend and I, had all voluntarily agreed to switch room assignments. The problem is, I never agreed to move. I only said that I didn't think housing would approve another move for me. I contacted both my area coordinator and housing to explain that I had not agreed to move, and I wasn't comfortable moving again after already being relocated this summer. Housing later told me that I don't have to move, and that because my guide dog accommodation was already on file, it would be up to my roommate to request a room reassignment if she wanted one.

I'm currently waiting for housing to let me know when everything's resolved before I return to my apartment. I feel sad because I know severe allergies are a legitimate issue, and I don't think my roommate is wrong for needing accommodations. At the same time, I don't think it's fair that I was expected to move a second time after already being relocated, unpacking everything, and getting settled. So am I the butthole for refusing to move? Well, we already know that your roommate lied about you saying you're okay to move, so I wouldn't be surprised if she also lied about the dog allergy, and she just either doesn't like dogs or she wants you out so that she can move her friend in, which is my personal theory. But regardless, even if she is allergic to dogs, I still think you're in the clear, OP. I'm giving you zero out of five buttholes. That was our slash am I the butthole. And if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast. podcast episodes every single day.

Two and five Canadians will hear the words you have cancer. That's why every step and dollar raised matters. On September 19th, join thousands in Toronto for the Princess Margaret Cancer Foundation walk. Challenge yourself, friends, and family to walk 21 kilometers in support of life-saving research. Together, we can carry the fire and help create a world free from the fear of cancer. Register today at PMC. F.walk.ca.