rSlash - r/AITA for Washing My Butt?

Episode Date: July 19, 2023

0:00 Intro 0:06 Bidet 5:23 Saying I love you 8:35 Granddaughter's clothes 12:03 Birthday dinner Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Holt Renfrew is sharing joy for the holidays with gifts for everyone on your list, and maybe even a special treat for yourself, too. Discover the new collection for Burberry by Daniel Lee. Add some ambiance with Louis V. Home. Give Gorpkora try and Solomon Sneakers, and so much more. Whatever presence you pick, we know they're going to love them. Visit a store today or shop at HoltRenfru.com Welcome to R-Slashe, Am I the Butthole, where a house guest washes her feet in a bidet.

Am I the Butthole for not telling strangers that I wash my butt? The title sounds like clickbait, but it's not. I'm a 30-year-old woman, and I come from a country where it's customary to wash your butt after you go number two. It's a standard practice like in many other countries, and every household has bathrooms with bidets. I currently live in a European country where it's not that common, but you can still find a few houses that do have a bidet, and some people hear wash and others wipe, but neither choice is strange to the other group. I happen to live in a bathroom with two houses, a small one with a toilet and a sink,

and a large one that also has a bathtub and a bidet. When I have guests, I usually point them to the small bathroom, but only because it's closer to the area that we usually hang out in. Last weekend, my wife and I had a bunch of friends over for a barbecue. One of my friends brought Kelly, a woman in her 30s who's from the US and who I've never met before. Everything was going well and I thought that Kelly was nice. I was grilling sausages, and at one point I take one out to give it to someone, and I dropped it on Kelly's feet who was wearing flip flops. I apologized profusely and handed Kelly a napkin.

She said not to worry, but she preferred to wash off, so she left while I stayed in the terrace cleaning the floor. She comes back a moment later and comments, how cute that your bathroom has a little feet washer. My wife and I were like, what? And when she repeats I say, oh, you mean the bidet? Kelly didn't know what a bidet was. And when I explained it to her, she was shocked and asked if we actually used it to wash after going to the toilet. And I said that my wife doesn't, but I do. And that's when Kelly lost it. She got agitated and furious asking how come we didn't tell her? To which I said, I've never had to explain to anyone what a bad day was before.

She said that we should have warned her, that we need to warn our guests that I wash my behind there because it's not normal and I was a butthole. I started naming some of the many, many countries that do wash as a cultural norm while also stating that here, even if people don't have one, everyone knows what a bidet is. But she completely went nuts when she realized that little towel hanging next to it was for drying my bottom. Seems like she used it to dry her feet and hands.

She left shortly after, along with my friend. I don't think I did anything wrong. My wife thinks the same, but my friend said that I should apologize and another friend said that she understood Kelly's point. Am I the butthole? I wanna point out that the bidet was clean. Also, OP clarifies that the butt wiping towel

is down at the level of the bidet. It's not up high at like waist level where you would expect a hand towel to be. OP also clarifies that everyone has their own individual butt towel. the bidet, it's not up high at like waste level where you would expect a hand towel to be. OP also clarifies that everyone has their own individual butt towel. Here's what I want to know. Putting the butt hole scores aside. What on earth went through this woman's mind where she comes into a bathroom?

She comes into a bathroom. She sees a little like you know, strange looking toilet device and her first thought first thought is oh a foot washer. I'll stick my feet in there. What? How is that her first thought as opposed to a bad day because bad days are a thing but like built in installed foot washers are not a thing. I know of no place on planet earth that has built in installed foot washers. So my guess as to what happened here is this woman was so incredibly embarrassed by both her stupidity and the fact that she got poo poo water on her feet that she lashed out at you as a way to like I don't know make herself feel better I guess. So I don't know if she really you know is truly angry at you or if she's just embarrassed.

I think she's probably just embarrassed. Nonetheless, I'm gonna give her, oh gosh, let's say 0.5 out of 5 buttholes. Cause she's more dumb than a butthole. OP, um, I think I'm gonna give you 0 out of 5 buttholes. However, I will say, I don't know about your poop towel situation. I have badays in my household. We got like five bidets installed across our five toys or something like that.

And we don't use poo-poo butt wiping towels. We use toilet paper afterwards to dry off. So I do kind of think that if you have poopy towels hanging around, I don't know how poopy they are, and someone could potentially mistake them for a hand towel. Then maybe you put up, you know, a little sign or a heads up would be nice. Because even though I use badays,

and I know what bad days are, my first thought seeing that probably wouldn't be that it's a butt wiping towel because a butt wiping towel is kind of gross, in my opinion. Why not just use toilet paper? That way you don't have a poopy towel. I'm hanging on your wall. You know what I mean?

You know, I'll point out that in the edit, OP says that the poop towel is pretty much poop-free, because you know, the Bade does its job, but still, that thing comes in direct contact with OP's butthole, so Julie, what are you just hanging out? I don't know. This is weird to me. But hey, I guess I can't complain too much because at least it's not a poop knife, like that one legendary reddit post about the family poop knife. Am I the butthole for embarrassing my father by offering to stop telling my kids that I love

them? I call my kids boy and girl, they're 15 and 16. I love the Simpsons, and I always thought that it was funny that Homer referred to Bart as boy and Bart called him Homer. With my father, everything was yes sir, no sir. I also constantly tell my kids that I love them and I'm proud of them. For some reason, the name thing puts a wild hair up my dad's butt. He was over last weekend, and he was loud about how I'm hurting my grandkids by not calling

them by their names. I told him that my kids were happy and to leave it alone, but he just wouldn't drop it. So I called my kids over to where we were talking, and I asked him if they wanted to be called by their names instead of boy and girl. I said, in return, they would have to call me Sir, not Daddy or Dad. I said that I would accept Father and emotional conversations, but that I would no longer remind them every day that I loved them and that I was proud of them. They both said that they were happy with the status quo. They know

what my relationship with my father is like. My father got all pissed off and said that's not what he wanted at all. So I asked him how often he told my sisters and I that he loved us or was proud of our accomplishments or just proud of us in general. He said that it was a different time, that his father was worse with him. So I asked him if he thought that my kids were happier than me and my sisters were growing up. I pointed out that my kids are happy, they're reasonably well adjusted. Now he's being pissy, and my mom says that he's upset that I think that he's a bad father,

but he wasn't a bad father, he was just emotionally distant. I hated it. My sisters both had to go through therapy to help them choose better men. They both fell in love with any guy who gave them attention. My daughter knows her worth and won't settle for anything but the best. My son has no problem hugging me and telling me or his mom about his life. They're teenagers. I know I don't know everything going on with them, but I'm doing my best to be there and give them the support that I never had. My kids know they're loved. I don't just say it, I try my best to show it.

My dad thinks that I'm being a butthole for pointing out where he didn't do great as a father when he tried to criticize my parenting. Wait, hold on, OP. So your dad had a flaw as a father where he wasn't really meeting your emotional needs and validating you, and by you pointing that out in a really kind, not really critical way. You're the butthole for pointing out that he wasn't a great father. So in general, I'm saying you're not the butthole, but I don't really know if the best way to convey

this lesson to your dad was to use your kids as like props and to threaten to tell them that you won't love them anymore. You're kind of, yeah, I'm not really a big fan of that interaction, but for the most part I'm on your side OP. I think I'll give you 0 out of 5 buttholes. Sounds like you're doing your best. I'm also giving your dad, you know, a really soft 0.5 out of 5 buttholes. It kind of sounds like he's going through something where he regrets how he was as a dad, but he doesn't really know how to be a modern man, I guess. So I'm kind of going easy on him.

Whole Threnfrew is sharing joy for the holidays with gifts for everyone on your list. man, I guess, so I know they're going to love them. Visit a store today or shop at HoltRenfru.com. Am I the butthole for being upset with the clothes my granddaughter wore on her way out of the maternity ward? I know it sounds silly, but I would like an outside opinion and accept any judgment. I have four kids, five grandkids. For each of my grandkids, I made a knitted outfit and hat for them to come out of the maternity ward.

It started with my first grandkids, and for each of the one that followed, my kids asked me to do it again. It's customary in my country for clothing to be a certain color to represent something good, like health, peace, and protection. I don't knit professionally, and I work, so this is something I do in my spare time, and it takes months because I do it with love and care. Also, I don't force my kids to accept the outfits. Most of them asked

me right after they announced the pregnancy if I can make them close. My oldest daughter, Pam, announced that she was pregnant and asked me to make an outfit for her daughter. Clearly, I did. She chose the color red, and honestly, it was one of the prettiest jobs I've ever done, and I finished within seven months of her pregnancy. She gave birth about 20 days ago. My granddaughter was born healthy, perfect, and bright. I was heartbroken on the way out of the maternity ward when I found out that my granddaughter didn't wear the clothes I made. But instead, clothing that Pam got from her in-laws from a very expensive brand, like Gucci.

I didn't say anything to her, but in a conversation with my son, I just vented that I was heartbroken about it, and that I wouldn't have any problems if she didn't ask, and I didn't do it in the sense of exposing my daughter or anything. But after my son insisted that I talk, he realized that I was a little down. The word spread among my other kids, until it reached Pam. She angrily called me and said that she couldn't believe that I was a little down. The word spread among my other kids until it reached Pam. She angrily called me and said that she couldn't believe that I was jealous of clothing and that her daughter could wear the knitted outfit whenever. But that I decided to make this moment about me and not celebrate my granddaughter's life. I'm lost. I'm just heartbroken that I've been making something so

lovingly for months for a specific moment and not been told at any point that she wouldn't use it. My family is divided, some criticizing me and others on my side. This is the most grand motherly post I've ever read in my life. A swathe, gosh it hurts my heart to think about. A sweet old lady is sad and asking the internet if she was wrong because she made a cute little outfit for her granddaughter and it didn't get worn. That's so sweet, OP.

And no, you're not the butthole. It is very, very clear from the family dynamics in your family history that everyone would expect the granddaughter to wear this knitted outfit, especially since your daughter literally asked you to make it. So the fact that they didn't… yeah, it is kind of insulting. Obviously, Pam has every right to dress her daughter however she wants to. But I don't know if she was like leading you on or just being entitled or what, but she was definitely in the wrong here.

Opie, I'm on your side. You sound like an awesome grandma. I'm giving you zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving Pam one out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving Pam 1 out of 5 buttholes. I think I'm also giving your son who you can fight it in 1 out of 5 buttholes as well, because it sounds like you were, you know, venting to him in a very private moment. You weren't trying to make drama, you were just hurt, and you were trying to process it with another person, and then he spread that to everyone else in the family and that caused drama, he should have respected your privacy there.

So for that, I think I have to give him 0.5 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for posting videos of my niece and nephew misbehaving in response to my sister's complaints that I didn't want them at my birthday dinner? My sister, Angel, claims to use hands-off parenting with my niece Sophia and my nephew Parker. In actuality, Angel is extremely permissive and refuses to discipline them. She expects other adults to step in when Sophia and Parker's behavior is getting out of hand. For this reason, I asked Angel to get a babysitter for Sophia and Parker if she wanted

to attend my 27th birthday. I love Sophia and Parker as they're on, but at the same time, I want a peaceful evening to celebrate my birthday instead of dealing with Sophia and Parker's behavior, because I know Angel is not going to discipline them herself. Angel acted understanding when I made this request and explained my reasons to her in person, but then she went online and made a Facebook post accusing me of hating Sophia and Parker, and trying to punish Angel by only inviting our sister Jessica's kid, Megan, to my birthday dinner.

Never mind that Megan is 17 and practically an adult herself. Several of our relatives in mutual acquaintances called me out and said that I was a butthole and that I was excluding a 10 and 7 year old. I responded to Angel's post by sharing two videos of Sophia and Parker misbehaving while Angel did nothing. The first video was a recording taken by Megan, where Sophia and Parker were throwing tantrums and yelling at her. Megan was trying to calm Sophia and Parker down while Angel was on her tablet, ignoring

the situation. The other video was one that Angel took. Sophia and Parker were yelling, throwing toys at each other, and Parker even called a sister a bad word. Angel was laughing as if it were funny and was doing nothing to discipline Sophia or Parker. I wrote alongside the videos that I love Sophia and Parker as they're on, But at the same time, I went a peaceful evening to celebrate my birthday, and I don't want to be stuck disciplining Sophia and Parker because clearly Angel won't. Angel ended up not coming to my birthday at all.

My parents told me that I was wrong for sharing those videos because everyone's kids have acted up, and posting those videos didn't accomplish anything besides embarrassing Angel. They also said that I should have compromised by having a no-one under 18 role for my birthday dinner. Megan wouldn't have been able to attend, but then Sophia and Parker wouldn't be excluded. I don't see why that would be fair to myself, or Megan. Am I the butthole for not wanting to make compromises for my birthday dinner? So I do agree that posting videos of someone else's kids on social media is a bit of a faux pas. The thing is, she's the one who opened that up, right?

If you had just posted them on Facebook saying, hey everyone look at my bratty niece and nephew. They need a huge butthole. But she's the one who started it. She embarrassed you on social media so you can't turn around and embarrass her on social media. Huh? So, uh, you stooped to her level, OP.

That being said, I'm on your side because honestly, she was asking for it. OP, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. You could have taken the high road, but you didn't, so I can't blame you. I'm giving Angel 1 out of five buttholes. That was our slash of my The Butthole, and if you liked this content, be sure to follow my podcast, because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.