rSlash - r/AITA "Give Me Your Vacation Home!"

Episode Date: February 16, 2024

0:00 Intro 0:21 Sharing my home 2:55 Topless dinner 6:10 Not sharing 8:52 Step kids 12:27 Inheritance now Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

WealthSimple is offering a 0.5% match when you transfer an account. When you transfer an account? That's what I said. That's what I said. Is WealthSimple's CEO Mike Ketchum copying me? Am I copying you? Seems like he's really into matching. Start an account transfer by February 29th, and WealthSimple will match it by 0.5%.

Visit wealthsimple.com slash matching for details. Offer available on eligible transfers. Additional terms apply. Do I have to say all that? Crypto is like the financial system, but different. It doesn't care where you come from, what you look like, your credit score, or your outrageous food delivery habits. Crypto is finance for everyone, everywhere, all the time. recording this from China where I'll be for about a

month for Chinese New Years. So just a heads up, over the next month or so, there might be a slight dip in audio quality, but hopefully it's not that bad. And eventually it'll go back to normal. Welcome to r slash am I the butthole where OP's in-laws tried to steal her vacation home. Am I the butthole for refusing to share my vacation home with my in-laws for six months after they sold their house without consulting me? I'm a 33-year-old woman and I've been married to my husband who's 35 for five years.

We own a beautiful vacation home on the beach that we built ourselves and we use throughout the year. My in-laws, who are in their 60s, have always been welcome guests, visiting for a few weeks here and there and contributing financially towards maintenance costs. Last month, my in-laws suddenly announced that they were selling their house to downsize and move into a tiny condo. Apparently, they've been secretly harboring this idea

for months, never mentioning it to me or my husband. They planned to close on the sale in two weeks and then move into our vacation home for six months while they figure things out. I was floored. This house is our sanctuary, not a retirement home extension. We use it frequently, have friends and family booked to visit throughout the year, and rely on the income it generates during peak season. My in-laws, on the other hand, haven't lifted a finger on the property themselves and contributed only minimally. My husband, plus his sweet heart, is more understanding.

He feels bad for his parents and believes that we can make it work. His in-laws, sensing my resistance, are now guilt-tripping us, claiming that they have nowhere else to go and are offering to pay significantly more than their usual contribution. Am I the butthole for refusing to let them move in? On one hand, I feel obligated to help family in need, but on the other, this feels like an outrageous imposition on our personal space and finances. Okay, sure, yeah, it's possible that they're just planning to downsize to a condo, but come on, on this channel we've read so many stories about terrible family members,

we know exactly where this is going. They're planning to move into your beach house and then drag their heels and then six months becomes nine months, then becomes a year, but then they find a place to buy and oh no, the sale fell through. Guess they gotta live there another year. You know what this reminds me of? You ever hear that phrase leap and a net will appear? It's supposed to be inspirational.

But the feeling that I'm getting from this is they're thinking they can leap and OP will be their net. OP, you're completely justified in shutting them down. If you feel blindsided, the reason is because they wanted to blindside you with this. That way you'd feel pressured into giving them a place to stay. OP, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving your in-laws 2.5 out of 5 buttholes.

Am I the butthole for coming to dinner basically topless? My parents-in-law and my brother-in-law came to visit and stay for a month with me and my husband after I had my baby. I'm 28 and my husband is 27. For context, if it makes any difference, I'm German and my husband and his family are Italian. The baby was three months old at the time and I breastfeed her. Usually, I would just nurse on the couch in the living room

but because company was staying, I went to my bedroom. After I nursed the baby, she'd fall asleep and take a nap and then I'd have some free time. Since family was visiting, I tried to plan the baby's naps around our meal time so I could spend time with the family uninterrupted. My mother-in-law has this thing that when food is on the table, you have to get there pronto. Sometimes I'd be late coming to a meal because babies can be unpredictable and she wouldn't

fall asleep right away or she nursed longer than normal. When this happened, my mother-in-law would barge into my room and announce that food was ready all impatient. This startled the baby and made the process last much longer than it should have. The result was that I had to eat much later than everyone else, alone, and my food was cold. It left me fuming. This happened several times. I asked my husband to talk to her

and explain that I can't always come on time. He talked to her, but she still did all this anyways. So I simply decided to stop being late to dinners. The next time she barged into my room and announced that food was ready, I came without hesitation. I came to the table exactly as I was. No shirt, half a bra, baby hanging onto one tit. To be clear, my baby's head was covering everything up, but still. Suddenly there's an uproar. My mother-in-law exclaims, What the hell are you doing at the table like this? You're indecent. There are men at the table. You should be ashamed. I yelled back, Why the hell do you keep calling me to the table if I'm not yet ready? I have no reason to be in my room alone with the baby while everyone else is out here having

a great time together. My brother-in-law and father-in-law are trying not to get into the argument. My husband ushers me back to the room and scolds me, taking his mother's side. He says that he understands that I'm frustrated, but that what I did didn't help anything. But after that, my mother-in-law no longer bothered me while I was busy with the baby. So what if I came to the meals a little late after everyone started eating? The roof didn't cave in. Anyways, everyone lived happily ever after. The end. Am I the butthole? Considering this is your house and your mother-in-law is bossing you around in your own home when you're trying to raise a baby, no, of course you're not the butthole.

The mother-in-law deserves a butthole score and you know who else? The husband. Not only does he not have his wife's back, but also he abandoned her during mealtime. I mean come on, your own husband can't just wait for you to get to the table. He HAS to eat right there. He's just gonna finish his entire plate. Leave the table and then let you eat cold food alone after you were nursing his own child? What a douchebag. Opie, you get 0 out of 5 buttholes. Your mother-in-law and your husband both get 2 out of 5 buttholes. I will agree that what you did was extreme, but sometimes drastic situations call for drastic measures. Am I the butthole for not

sharing your free meal with my anti-Instagram boyfriend? I post my food pictures from when I go out to eat on Instagram. It's just for fun. I spend like 30 minutes a week on it, tops. My boyfriend is a very sweet guy in many ways, but one thing that I'm not so much a fan of is that he often hops on the bandwagon of hating on innocent things. Not just not liking something, but making sure everyone knows that he doesn't like it even if nobody asks. I can't help but notice a theme. Pumpkin Spice lattes, poutyies, Taylor Swift, etc. As you can guess, he is not a fan of the food pictures and thinks that it's very annoying and cringe. He doesn't even follow my Instagram, even though he has an account. Even though I don't have many followers, I've started getting occasional offers and invitations from restaurants in my city to try their food for free in exchange for a review.

Nothing crazy, no steak dinner so far, but I've gotten a few sandwiches and several baked goods. Well, I just hit the big leagues, and I got invited to a new restaurant opening that includes a free appetizer and entree for me and one guest. I immediately invited one of my Instagram friends, who I've gone out to eat with on several occasions, and who also enjoys taking food photos. I told my boyfriend and he's pissed that I'm not taking him and says that I'm doing it out of spite. But really, I think I'm not.

If the restaurant is giving me free food in exchange for a post, I'm gonna put more effort into the post and spend a few extra minutes making sure I actually get very good shots and I'd rather do it with someone who isn't gonna sigh and roll their eyes throughout the entire thing. Also, I think it's pretty audacious of him to be actively unsupportive of an activity that hurts no one but then also expects to benefit when it's actually successful. You know OP when you said that he doesn't like innocent things it sounds like the innocent things that he doesn't like are all stereotypically related to women. The pumpkin spice latte, the selfies, Taylor Swift, typically those are girly things,

so maybe your boyfriend just doesn't like women. I can't say for sure whether or not he's a sexist, but he is definitely a hypocrite. Screw him OP, you have every right to go enjoy that meal with your friend who shares your interests. You know the dumb thing is even if OP's boyfriend was supportive it's still completely reasonable for OP to go to this meal with her friend who has a shared interest because that's what friends with shared interests do. OP you get zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving your dumb boyfriend one out of five buttholes. Maybe you should post a review about your lame boyfriend. One out of five stars.

I had to return him. Am I the butthole for dropping off my stepkids with my in-laws and saying they're not my problem anymore? My wife passed away just before last Thanksgiving. It came out of nowhere and I'm somewhat broken. To make it worse, my stepkids have decided that since I'm not their father, they don't have to obey me anymore.

They're teenagers and they've never been my biggest fan. They love their dad and I was only ever their mom's husband. However, when their mom was alive, they treated our home well and me with respect. After she died, they became buttholes. Yeah, I know their mom died. It sucks. But that was my wife and the mother of my kids as well. I'm also having a tough time dealing. Their paternal grandparents are also dumping on me for not being more understanding of everything they're going

through. I've tried. I've offered them counseling. I've given them space. I've been there for them. I'm at my wit's end. The last straw was when we were over at my in-laws for supper last week I said it was time to go so I could get the little ones to bed My step kids said that they didn't want to go and that I should leave them and come back for them It's a two-hour drive. I said no their grandparents said that I was being too hard on them and that I should let them stay. I'm having a hard time with two small kids, the loss of my wife and two teenage buttholes without having my in-laws pile on to make my life more difficult. So I did leave them. I also packed up their stuff when I got home. Instead of coming back for them,

I dropped off their stuff at their grandparents' house. I have two kids under the age of five to take care of. I don't really have time to baby two teenagers that are just making my life harder. Now, my house is clean for the first time in weeks. My kids are sleeping through the night. My stepkids are living with their uncle in the same city as me, so they can finish high school with their friends. Everyone on their dad's side is against me, but I don't really care. I was told by both of them, and by their father, that I am not to try to parent them, so I'm not. I actually don't have any parental rights

over them. Their dad wasn't even okay with me being a contact for them at school, so his parents bear the contact. My wife left behind a small life insurance policy, which I'll divide between the four kids. But I was the breadwinner in the house. I bought pretty much everything for the last eight years, so now everything's mine. My in-laws are calling me the butthole for abandoning the kids, but I have two kids that need me more. My stepkids have their biological dad, as well as grandparents to help them. My kids only have me and I want them to have a peaceful home. Alright, hold on. I'm confused. I feel like I'm missing something. Why don't the kids just go live with their dad? Especially if their

biological father is so hands-on and uptight about OP not being involved. Okay, then come get your kids. Like, huh? Why is this an issue? And it sounds like OP doesn't really like his step kids that much, and the step kids don't really like OP either, so why is everyone so focused on OP raising the kids? I think I know the answer.

I think you know the answer too. It's money. It's simply money. Everyone wants OP to raise these kids, because if they do it, that means they have to dish out some money. So I'm on your side, OP. It sounds like you tried to do everything you can

to be there with the kids, but you can't force someone to love you. If they don't want you in their life, then there's not a lot you can do about that. OP, I'm giving you zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving the step kids one out of five buttholes and I'm giving your in-laws 2.5 out of five buttholes Am I the butthole for telling my in-laws that if they want a grandchild they should get my wife her inheritance now?

Basically my in-laws want their only child my wife Diana to start pumping out grandkids My wife is 28 and just finishing her PhD Then she wants to get established in a career before she starts a family. My in-laws know how much money I make and they know that we could live comfortably off my earnings. That isn't what Diana wants. She's worked her butt off to get where she is and she wants to reap the rewards of her hard work. She also says that once she's working I can cut back on my hours as a welder and relax a little. I've been working since I was 15, so literally half my life. I make a very good living in return for a lot of fairly hard work.

I've supported Diana and her education. She'll graduate without student loans. We have a house and she has a good car. We have a good life. We want a few more years alone before we start our family. Over Christmas, the in-laws just wouldn't drop it. I finally snapped. I said that if they wanted grandkids,

then they could reimburse us for her education. Further, they could pay her the salary that she would be giving up. Then when she returned to work, they could pay her the difference between what she could be earning and her entry-level position. They could also pay for a nanny so my wife could work. Or they could

back off and wait for us to be ready. They said they couldn't afford all that. I asked them how they expected us to afford it. I said that if that's really what they wanted then they could just give her the inheritance that would be coming her way now instead of later. They got all offended and said that it's not hers until they don't need it anymore. Diana asked me to drop it. She's tried dozens of times to explain to her parents why we're waiting. They just ignore her.

They ignore what we want for our lives. They've been very cold since Christmas. They seem to think that I was a rude butthole for pointing out the cost of what they were asking for. A lot of her family agree with them that I went too far in asking them to pay if they went a grandchild now instead of later. So I will say that your blow-up was a bit harsh OP, however it feels deserved because your in-laws literally just won't mind their own business.

So if they're not going to shut up, then your only option is to make them shut up. I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes, I'm giving up. I'm giving you zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving your in-laws 1.5 out of five buttholes. That was R slash am I the butthole. And if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.