rSlash - r/AITA I Called the Cops on My Sister

Episode Date: August 25, 2026

0:00 Intro 0:05 Police 1:42 Hot tub 6:55 Joke 8:43 Anniversary 11:37 Visitor 13:27 My Deck Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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You should have ordered from Wayfair. With Wayfair, there's no what-if. Just style you love and quality you can trust. Visit Wayfair.ca. Way fair, every style, every home. Welcome to R slash Am I the Butthole, where O.P. is the victim of revenge porn. Am I the butthole for going to the police on my sister? I'm a 26-year-old woman.

I accidentally left my iPad in my sister-in-law's car, and she went into it without my permission and sent explicit photos she found to my mother. I'm honestly mortified. Her and my brother tried to sit me down and have an interoperated, intervention with me about things that she saw on my iPad. For reference, there was nothing extremely wild on the iPad. I'm a 26-year-old single woman, so you can read between the lines there. I also used to be a midnight ballerina two years ago. I have never heard that phrase before. What does that mean? It is sling, okay, it's a stripper, I see. But I don't feel like she was right to go into

my personal device just because it was in her possession. It was definitely not right. right for her to send explicit pictures and videos to my mother. I want to press charges and file a restraining order or something, but I've never been through anything like this. Also, OP clarifies that the iPad was locked, but the woman guessed the passcode, which was the year her daughter was born. Yeah, doesn't this fall under revenge porn laws?

Even though it's not really revenge, you can't just send nudes out and about to random people or post them online. That's a criminal offense. So, if you want to press charges, go press charges. Because on top of that, what she did was nuts? What even went through her mind? Oh, look, titties. I'm going to send a picture of these titties to her mom.

Huh? What? Why? Am I the butthole for buying a hot tub after my brother's friends kept refusing to allow him or anyone else in their pool that my brother helped to buy? My brother Pete, who's 14, and his friends Carl and James, also 14, got the idea in the middle of June to buy a pool for the rough summer we usually have, because the local community pool is being shut down. When Pete or his friends couldn't convince anyone to buy it for

them, they got motivated to work for it. Pete mowed lawns and did other yard work around the county, and the other two did their own work, and after a few weeks, they pooled their money together and were able to buy a cheap above-ground pool. Me and Carl and James's parents were really impressed and thought they deserved it after working for it. We all agreed to set the pool up in Carl's backyard because their backyard is the biggest. They filled it up and did all the work for it. And the first weekend it was available,

Pete and his friends all hung out in the pool. The problem is that was the only time Pete or James have been in the pool. Carl, apparently, is allowed to go in whenever, but nobody else. His parents have been asked multiple times, but they're always shot down. One time, Pete ended up sneaking into the pool while I was at work, and when Carl's dad found him out there, he came out and yelled at him. Carl was in the water, too, according to Pete. He and James were obviously confused, so when I went to talk to Carl's parents about Pete sneaking into the pool, I asked why they weren't allowed in at all.

Carl's dad kept harping on the fact that Pete went in without permission, which I understand. But what I don't understand is why whenever they're asked, to come over and swim, they're never allowed to. Carl's parents both explained it's a liability reason, meaning if anything were to happen to anyone in their pool, like if someone drowned, they don't want to be responsible, and it's easier to just not allow anyone but their son in the water. But these are teenagers, not toddlers, they all know how to swim. At the end of the conversation, Carl's dad was like, the pool is on my property and we used our water to fill it up, so we decide what to do with it. I raised my voice a little bit by reminding them that they didn't buy that pool. It belongs to their son, my brother, and James.

I understand that it's on their property, but it's unfair to gatekeep it from people who helped to buy it. They wouldn't answer that, and threatened that Pete wouldn't be allowed at their house at all if they were asked again, which Pete would hate to hear since he loves their house. So I left it at that. Pete was pissed to say the least. And he loved to rant to anyone who listened while gaming with his friends about the situation. He asked if they could really do that, and we should call the cops.

But I told him let's not go that far, even though I agreed those people basically stole from him. But he and Carl had been friends for nearly 10 years, and they do everything together, so I'd hate to see them be separated over something petty like this. So I came up with another idea, and I went shopping online and found an inflatable hot tub. for about the same amount of money they spent on the pool. It might have been just as petty, and I dipped a bit into my savings, but I bought it. Could I have bought the pool myself?

Maybe, but at the same time, Pete wanted it bad, and I got other things to worry about, and he's learning to work for what he wants. And a hot tub is good for my back. Pete's been in the hot tub nearly every day since it's been set up. His friends are welcome inside it too. My only rule is that they got a shower at their own house. before or after they get in.

It's big enough for like five people. James and Carl have been over a lot to go in the hot tub, and their parents have noticed. James' dad is totally okay with it, and thinks that what Carl's parents are doing is BS too. But he agrees that the kids should all get their reward for all their work with the hot tub. Carl's parents, on the other hand, aren't too happy.

Carl told me himself that he prefers to be in the hot tub with his friends, rather than swimming alone in the pool. And his parents don't understand that. I haven't spoken to them directly about this, but Carl has heard rants from his mom about how everyone thinks there's some kind of child-hating monsters for not allowing anyone in their pool, which they didn't purchase.

It hasn't helped that Pete still loves to rant about it too, and he knows a lot of neighborhood kids who also come to dip in the hot tub. I do see Carl's mom at the store sometimes, but she doesn't make eye contact with me anymore. I know it was petty, but am I the butthole? I really hate that last line. I know it's petty.

There seems to be this unspoken sentiment that being petty is wrong or bad sometimes. Yo, sometimes pettiness is deserved and justified, righteous even. Carl's terrible parents basically stole from hardworking teenagers and taught them that hard work gets punished. And then we're supposed to, you know, listen to their sob story. Whatever, man. O.P., you're totally fine. Yes, it was petty, and I'm glad that it was petty. You get zero out of five buttholes. Am I the butthole for leaving a dinner party early after my friends made a joke about me?

I'm a 23-year-old woman, and I went out for dinner with four of my friends last weekend. We've all known each other for a while, so we're pretty comfortable making fun of each other. At some point, they started talking about how everyone in the group has changed since college. It was mostly harmless until one of them said that I was basically the backup friend of the group because I'm always available when everyone else is busy. Everyone laughed, including me at first, because I didn't want to make it awkward. Then another friend said, She's not even offended because she knows it's true.

They started bringing up random times when I'd been left out of plans and joke that I was basically the person they called when someone canceled. I laughed it off at the table, but honestly it really got to me. I ended up making an excuse that I wasn't feeling well and left early. Later that night, one of them tened. texted asking why I was being weird. I told her that the jokes actually hurt my feelings, especially because some of what they were joking about was true. She said that I was taking a joke way too seriously and that nobody actually thinks I'm a backup friend. I told her that if that's true,

they probably shouldn't joke about something they know I'm insecure about. She said she didn't even know I was insecure about it, and now everyone is apparently annoyed that I made the whole dinner awkward. I haven't talked to them much since. Part of me thinks I should have just laughed it off because they weren't trying to hurt me, but another part of me feels stupid for pretending I was fine when I wasn't. Why is it a problem for you leaving and making things awkward

when it's not a problem for them making fun of you and making it awkward for you? O.P., your friends, if you can call them that, have shown their true colors. So the best you can do is believe them. Am I the butthole for declining both of our parents' anniversary trips? because we don't think milestone anniversary should require $15,000 vacations? My husband and I have been together for almost 20 years.

One thing that's always been true is that both of our families seem to compete with each other over who's the better grandparent, who gives more gifts, who spends more money, and who gets more time with us. It's been exhausting enough, and we've intentionally limited contact with both sides. Recently, both sets of parents have had age-related health issues. Since then, every holiday or family event seems to come with comments like, this could be our last Christmas, our last vacation, our last chance to make memories. I understand where that's coming from, but it also feels like every invitation now comes with guilt attached.

The current issue started with my husband's parents' 50th wedding anniversary. The family decided to celebrate with a week-long cruise. For my husband, me, and our child, it would cost around $15,000. Everyone else immediately put down deposits. We quietly declined. It wasn't because we don't love them or don't want to celebrate. We just can't justify spending that much on one vacation. We suggested alternatives like a large anniversary party or family reunion that would let everyone celebrate together without such a huge financial commitment. But those ideas weren't well received. A short time later, my parents announced that for their 45th anniversary, they wanted everyone to go on an international all-inclusive vacation.

This wasn't something they'd mentioned before, and the timing made it feel like they heard about my in-laws trip and didn't want to be outdone. Their trip would cost less than the cruise, but it's still a significant expense. We declined that one too for the exact same reason. We don't think it makes sense to spend that kind of money on back-to-back family vacations. regardless of which side is asking. Now, both families think that we're selfish, don't value family, and we'll regret not making these memories if someone dies. We do understand our parents getting older, and we genuinely sympathize with that. But it feels like we're being pressured to spend tens of thousands of dollars because of guilt and fear rather than because it's something we'd actually choose to do.

We aren't refusing to celebrate. We just don't think milestone anniversary should come with the expectation that everyone else pays for luxury vacations when there's plenty of meaningful, less expensive ways to celebrate. I'm on your side, O.P., dropping $30,000 on vacations in one year is a luxury that very few people can realistically afford. This isn't about being right or wrong or being the butthole or not the butthole. This is just economics, man. If you don't have the money, you don't have the money. Am I the butthole for warning a visitor that they risk having the police called on them? So I work in a small museum in Italy. Yesterday, we had a couple from Northern Europe coming in to visit.

You need to know that in Scandinavia, it's common for parents to leave the children to sleep in their strollers outside of the house and various establishments, since it's extremely safe. This is absolutely not the case in Southern Europe, especially here in Italy. That counts as child abandonment, and I would very much not deem it safe for a child to be alone in a public space, especially one as trafficked as the specific area where I work. This couple decided to leave their sleeping 3-year-old in the space between the lifts and the bathroom, where we, the staff, do not pass through often. I only realized the child had been left there because I passed through two times in the span of 20 minutes. Thankfully, we were able to locate the parents really quick,

and they were really surprised when we told them that doing that was really dangerous. And in the best case scenario, it could result in having the pull, police called on them for child abandonment. My supervisors all agreed with me. But some other people just brushed it off and said, but it's normal for them. And nothing happens. So what's the problem? Isn't it just common knowledge, logic that if you go to a new country, you have to follow the local customs and laws? Because even though they're not your laws, they still apply to you. I mean, if I went to, what's the country that doesn't let you drink? Is it Iran, Iraq? If I go to Iran, I'm not going to crack open a cold one and drank in front of people and say, hey, I'm American, so your laws don't

apply to me. Nah, man, I would expect to end up in jail if I did that. So if anything, O.P., you did these people a favor by warning them, hey, don't do that because you will go to jail if you try that in Italy. Am I the butthole for using my own deck, even though it annoys my neighbors? I live in sort of a weird apartment complex, and my deck sits kitty corner to my neighbors. We're separated by two fences. My neighbor is a private, lady and is grumpy. Complains about everything. But I'm always friendly and say hello and I've never had a personal issue with her. I love my deck. It's in the sun with partial shade from a tree. I spend all my time out there when I can. If I come out and she's out on hers, she'll immediately

get up and go inside. She won't come back out unless I go inside. All I ever do out here is read, do a crossword, and sit. No music, no talking, no videos, nothing. Maybe I'll have a conversation with my husband if he comes outside. I also don't smoke or drink. Today, I was outside from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Throughout that time, my neighbor poked her head out multiple times. Every time I smiled and waved or said hi, and she just went back in without acknowledging me. I'm thinking that just my presence annoys her, and sometimes I feel bad, but then I remind myself this is my own space. She has her own space, and I'm not actually stopping her from using it. She's choosing to go in anytime I come out.

Am I the butthole just using my deck, even though it clearly annoys her for no apparent reason? This post is like an introvert cold war. O.P. is such an introvert that she will spend six hours by herself outside with no phones, no conversation, nothing, just, I don't know, looking at birds or doing crosswords. And yet, somehow, her neighbor is even more of an introvert than OP is. Regardless, OP, you get zero out of five buttholes. It's your deck so you can use it however you want to. That was R-slash-M-I-the-butthole. And if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast

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