rSlash - r/AITA I Got Stalked by a Crazy Gym Lady

Episode Date: June 19, 2025

0:00 Intro 0:07 Gym lady 7:12 Sleepover boundaries 10:05 Vacation 13:50 House Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to r slash am I the butthole where OP gets stalked by a crazy lady from the gym. Am I the butthole for telling a woman at the gym that she's embarrassing herself? I go to the gym a lot. About six months ago, I noticed a woman, Andrea. Full disclosure, I spoke to her first, but I had no way of knowing what the result would be. A lot of the machines at this gym have little entertainment systems attached to them that can access local channels. I got on a treadmill and realized the TV on the treadmill wasn't working. Andrea was walking past and I said, hey, do you know if there's an issue with the cable? This TV isn't working, but I don't know if it's just this one or all of them. She said the same thing happened to her on a different

machine. I thanked her and that was the whole interaction. A week later, she asked me for some electrolyte powder for her water. I said I didn't have any. She was cool with that and asked me how long I'd been coming to the gym and what I did for work. I answered and returned her questions. She said she was new to the area and worked in private security. We had a few more chill conversations after that. Six weeks ago, she asked me out. For reasons I won't get into here, I wasn't interested. I declined. She said not to worry about things being awkward at the gym if we don't work out.

I said that wasn't the issue. I'm just not looking to date right now. She kept talking to me, and at first, I kept talking to her. But I started to think that something might be wrong and I started avoiding her. Two weeks ago, she walked up to me while I was on the machine with only one way to properly dismount that involved stepping into where she was standing. She asked me if I was avoiding her.

I said I was and apologized. I said that I don't want to date right now. She said I don't have to avoid her to not date her. I said Okay, and kept avoiding her though tonight while I was working out. She confronted me again about avoiding her I had a bad day and told her to leave me alone She asked why I was being such a prick and I said that I wanted her to leave me alone I said that she was embarrassing herself and needs to stop. She put her foot on top of the weights that I was using, and I thought that she was going to press down on them, so I let go of the bar very quickly, causing

the weights to slam and make a loud noise. Several people looked over. She said, now who's embarrassing himself? And walked away. Did I go too far by saying that? Do I owe her an apology? Also, I went in early this morning for a run, and I told the front desk staff about Andrea putting her foot on the weights. They said they would talk to her. Then, after work, I went in for a regular workout. I was working on my legs when Andrea walked up to my machine. The first thing she did was apologize about the weights. I don't know if someone talked to her or if it was her own initiative. I accepted her apology and apologized for saying she was embarrassing herself. She said she forgave me, but if I really wanted to make it up to her, I could buy her a drink and she would buy me one too to make up for the weights.

I said maybe we could buy our own drinks, meaning separately at different places and times, and she misunderstood me and asked when and where. I told her that I didn't want to go out with her. She said this wouldn't be a date, but a reset for our friendship. I said I don't want to be friends. She said I was being a douche and asked what my problem was. I said the weight incident made me uncomfortable and I would rather us just give each other space. She then asked me if my problem with her is that she's Hispanic. I was so taken aback. I didn't even know she was Hispanic until she said that. I said no, you just make me uncomfortable. She wanted me to explain what about her made me uncomfortable, and I tried to do so, but

she argued with every point I made. I got frustrated and told her to just stay away from me. She said fine and that I have a lot of maturing to do. Then she walked away. I'm hoping that's the end of it. Then four days later, OP posted an update. Andrea is banned from the gym. I was running on the treadmill watching TV. She came up to talk to me and I ignored her staring at the TV.

She raised her voice and I continued to ignore her. She reached out and pulled the safety tab out of the treadmill. The one that you connect to your wrist so the treadmill stops if you fall, causing the treadmill to come to a sudden stop. I tripped and fell onto the controls and TV, scratching my chin on the top of the screen. I went to the front desk with Andrea following me. I told them what she did. Andrea kept trying to interrupt me and talk over me, but the woman at the front desk told her to be quiet and wait her turn.

I told her Andrea pulled out my safety tab while I was running and injured me. The woman at the front desk then asked Andrea what happened. Andrea said that I was staring into the middle distance like I was in some sort of fugue state, and she thought that I was having a medical episode, so she pulled the tab. The woman at the front desk asked for

Andrea's membership card. Andrea didn't want to give it to her, but the woman at the front desk said that if she didn't, she would ban her. Andrea gave her the card, and the woman at the front desk said to leave and that she was suspended for a month. Andrea objected and got into an argument with the woman at the front desk, which escalated into Andrea calling the woman an N-word and the B-word. So Andrea was banned permanently. I hesitate to call it a happy ending because the poor gym employee had to put up

with racial harassment, but I won't deny that watching the woman cut up Andrea's membership card felt good. Then four days after that, OP posted an update. Last night, I went to a bar near my apartment to meet up with some friends. The three of us were drinking and having a good time. When Andrea walked up, I never saw her enter the bar. I only noticed her when she was in front of us.

She greeted me and said that it was good to see me and then leaned in to try to kiss me. I pushed her away from me and she fell, but one of my friends caught her. She started yelling and asking what the F is wrong with me. I told her to stay away from me and not come any closer. She asked if I was embarrassed of her and didn't want my friends to see her. I said, this is the third time you've tried to assault me and I want you to stay away from me. At this point, the bouncer showed up to ask what was going on. Andrea said I pushed her. I tried to explain that she tried to kiss me and she's stalking me,

but I was drunk and not doing a great job. My friends also tried to explain that I was innocent, but they were also drunk. Security kicked me out of the bar. My friends walked me home. I am definitely going to try to get a restraining order. This has gone way too far. Yo, this is just straight up sexual harassment, getting into stalker, illegal, crime-committing territory. If the genders were reversed, people in the comments

would be absolutely seething over Andrea's behavior. OP, you get an easy 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving Andrea a 3.5 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for enforcing basic boundaries on my daughter's sleepover? I'm a 42 year old man and I have two kids living with me. My daughter Anya who's 17 and my stepson Noah who's 14. Noah's mom passed a few years ago and I've had full custody since. He's had a rough go of it but he's a good kid with

his quirks. He's not anti-social or shy but he does not appreciate having his space invaded and when very upset he can kind of shut down. Anya is much more outgoing and has a lot of friends. She asked to have a sleepover this weekend with four of them. I said yes, of course, but given that the friends who were coming were pretty loud and have a tendency to crowd Noah, I told her to make sure they don't go into her brother's room. Also, to keep things down after 11 so the house can sleep. In my opinion, these are NOT strict rules.

To my surprise, I came upstairs to check on them at about 10pm. They're 17 years old, I didn't think I needed to check on them every hour or something, and they were in Noah's room. And they looked like they'd been in there for a while. Two were literally sitting on his bed, with him there, one of them flipping through a sketchbook, another was messing with his stuff, and they were all kind of giggling in this weird way. Noah was clearly upset. He didn't say anything or move,

but there were tears in his eyes, and he didn't respond when I tried to talk to him. I told the girls to get out right then, and that I was calling every single one of their parents. Anya was pretty upset with me, but I told her I gave them two rules, and they failed spectacularly. I did actually call all of their parents and sent them home as soon as possible.

Anya blew up, saying I embarrassed her. I told her to go to her room and that we would speak on this in the morning. I spent about 20 minutes with Noah before he decided he wanted to cool down on his own, and I went back to my daughter, who chose not to speak to me. It's late, and both of my kids are hopefully asleep, and I'm left not knowing if I handled things right. Am I the butthole?

I was a 14-year-old boy once, and at that age, the most desirable and also most terrifying thing on earth were crowds of girls. So I fortunately slash unfortunately never had an experience where four to five seventeen year old girls were all hanging out in my room when I was 14, but I have to imagine it would have been a very uncomfortable and awkward situation. And it seems to me like that was Anya and her friend's intention to tease and to, I guess, manipulate and just toy with him somehow. Which was mean even without the boundaries in place. But with the boundaries in place, it becomes so much more cruel.

OP, I definitely think you did the right thing by enforcing your boundaries here. I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving Anya 1.5 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving Anya 1.5 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for telling my girlfriend that she can't force me to cancel my vacation and lose $2500 just because she hates Harry Potter? I'm a 27-year-old guy, and I've been with my girlfriend, who's 27, for 4 years now. I've always wanted to visit Universal Orlando to see the wizarding world of Harry Potter, but I've never been able to justify it financially. My dad died recently and I got an inheritance in his will. Not life-changing money, but enough to pay off my debts and have something left over.

So I decided to book a trip for Universal, and I was lucky enough to get tickets for their new park as well. My best friend loves Star Wars, and so do I, so we decided we'd go together and split time between Universal and Disney World because we probably wouldn't have the chance to go again anytime soon. I told my girlfriend this up front, and she said that she was excited for us, but didn't want us to go because she doesn't support Harry Potter because of Rowling and her views on LGBT people. She was fine with it until she found out Rowling, it might be pronounced Rowling, I actually don't know how to pronounce this woman's name, she found out Rowling is apparently using her fortune to fund anti-trans campaigns and she started screaming at me about supporting

transphobia. Her younger brother is trans, so trans rights are extremely important to her, which makes sense. Early in our relationship, we basically agreed that I could go whenever I wanted regarding Harry Potter, but she wouldn't join in. It's never been a problem until now. During the discussion, she tells me I'm not allowed to go because it'd be supporting Rowling, which is supporting anti-trans people, and not supporting her brother. I said, honey, I understand what you're saying, but if I cancel, I can't get my money back. When I booked the trip, I booked with a trip planner and they said explicitly my tickets

are non-refundable. I can change the dates if I need to cancel my initial trip, but I won't be refunded if I cancel and don't show up. My plane tickets, hotel, and park tickets are all non-refundable. I spent about $2,500 on this trip. I can't justify wasting that kind of money, and she knows that, but she says it doesn't matter, it's not about the money, it's about the principal, and I'm not allowed to go. I respect what she's saying and where she's coming from, but I'm not throwing away that

kind of money. And she can't just ban me from going somewhere. I'm an adult just like she is, and I can make my own decisions. I feel bad because I see both sides. On my end, I'm not willing to just lose almost three grand. On her end, she wants to support her brother. I want to be considerate and respect her wishes, but that would make me lose thousands of dollars. And I'm not sure if I'm just hung up on the money part instead of how she feels. Am I the butthole?

Okay, I'm going to put aside the whole Harry Potter trans-ethical thing because I don't actually think that's relevant to the post here. Because even if the girlfriend is 100 hundred percent justified, OP can still go on the trip and visit Orlando and hang out with his friend and go see Star Wars, can't he? So why does he have to cancel the entire trip? That's just stupid. Plus she flip-flopped on him and didn't tell him that she flip-flopped because she initially gave him permission to go to the park and then after he bought the non-refundable tickets suddenly she's changed her mind. If that was a strict

boundary for her she really should have told OP before he bought the tickets. So I think she's being overly strict and controlling here. Even if you agreed with her you could just go to Star Wars and spend the entire time you know shooting space lasers and playing with lightsabers and everything. So I'm on your side, OP. I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for moving into the house I inherited even though the lodger doesn't feel comfortable around men? I inherited a house that came with a lodger with a 6-year-old that's renting one of the rooms. She's upset because I have, in her words, made it terrifying to live here since I've

moved in. She doesn't feel safe with her and her daughter living with a man that she just met, and that she wants to stay away from men because of issues with her ex. That's why living with an old woman felt so safe. By the way, this is all being communicated through notes that she's been leaving around the house because she avoids me. I've already wrote back that she can move out whenever. She left another note saying she will, but she really doesn't want to have to because the reason she moved in here was so that her daughter could go to the school district here and the only way she was able to afford to live here is because her lease is just 150 bucks, utilities, and also housework, and they might have to move back is because her lease is just 150 bucks, utilities.

And also housework. And they might have to move back in with her ex. So basically, she wants ME to move out. I don't want to because the house still has a mortgage that I would have to continue to pay in addition to paying for rent somewhere else. There technically is the option to get a female tenant. However, the prices for renting a single bedroom won't cover the mortgage, and I can't afford to make up the difference.

Plus, I would have to deal with my grandma's things faster than I'd want to. Another big thing is that I can avoid tax reassessment on the house if I move in within a year, which is also why selling is definitely off the table. You know, on one hand, I can sympathize with the lodger. She didn't expect this to happen. You know, she signed the lease with the old lady, and the old lady died. It's an uncomfortable position to be in for sure. But to expect the new owner to just move out and let you live there basically for free is just stupid. It sounds like the old woman was okay with the lodger staying there because she was old

and she needed help with housework, I'm guessing. But the situation's changed, lady! Either deal with it or move out! OP, you get 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving the lodger 2 out of 5 buttholes. Classic choosing beggar behavior. That was r slash amythebutthole and if you liked this content be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.