rSlash - r/AITA I Slept with My Bully on My Wedding Day

Episode Date: April 9, 2024

0:00 Intro 0:06 Frenemy 3:10 Insensitive 8:58 Get a job 10:51 Stuarta 12:35 Comment 12:55 Prenup Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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I do. Enjoy the number one feeling, winning, in an exciting live dealer studio, exclusively on FanDuel Casino, Welcome to r slash Am I the Butthole where OP sleeps with her bully on her wedding day. Am I the butthole for sleeping with my frenemy on my wedding day? For reference, this happened about five years ago, but I was confronted about it recently. I'm a very boring person, and this was literally the only dramatic thing that's ever happened to me in my life. Six years ago, my fiancee proposed to me. I was thrilled.

We planned a beautiful, intimate wedding. I've always gotten along with his friends and family. His mother adores me. We've disagreed, but we never argued. We found ways to resolve our problems. Inside and out, we were a great couple. I never thought that he would literally leave me at the altar. Our families, friends, and even the officiator kept trying to reassure me, but almost two hours after the ceremony was supposed to start, I got a call saying that he got cold feet and he didn't want to get married. He wanted to get more out of life before being tied down. I did some things that I'm not proud of. I begged my mom to get me out of the dress, and I tore the stupid thing. I left the wedding after everyone kept looking at me with pitying eyes. I fended off a lot of calls from family and friends telling them

I was fine and I didn't want to talk. Here's the thing that I was called a butthole for. I have a frenemy. We've known each other since middle school. He's always been a class clown bully. I was not attractive growing up, and he would jokingly flirt with me and try to annoy me as much as possible. He never really grew out of either of those things. So when he called up to check on me, or really, to rub it in my face that I was dating a loser who dumped me on my wedding day, he asked if I wanted to hook up with him. I said, yeah, because my life was ruined anyways, so what could be worse? He picked me up, and we slept together.

He's the second person I've ever been with, the first being my fiancé. I'm not religious, I just saw it as special that we were each other's first and only. My fiancé evidently didn't feel the same. I blocked my fian fiance, as did the rest of my family. His mom profusely apologized to me, and said that his late father would never have approved of what he did. My now ex-fiance contacted me recently. He wanted closure, he said. He apologized for ghosting me, but he immediately said that it didn't justify me sleeping with someone else the night of our wedding.

I told him that it wasn't a healthy thing to do, but I've gotten comments from his friends that I acted badly, and they would have left me too. I don't even know if what I did was wrong. Am I the butthole? Yo, hold on, hold on, hold on, wait a second, wait a second. He's angry at you because you slept with someone else on your wedding day? What exactly does he mean, wedding day? Because you didn't get married. He didn't get married. Nobody got married. The reason you didn't get married is because he dumped you. So the second he dumped you, you can do whatever the hell you want. OP, you get zero out of five buttholes. Your ex-fiance is a double butthole. He gets two out of five buttholes for Your ex-fiancee is a double butthole. He gets two out of five buttholes for

abandoning you at the altar and another one out of five buttholes for calling you afterward to complain about what you did. Am I the butthole for kicking my girlfriend out after she called me a crybaby for crying over my dead niece? I met my now ex-girlfriend four years ago in college. Until recently, she seemed like the type of woman that I would want to marry. Extremely kind, genuine, and generally a joy to be around. My big sister and her husband had a daughter at the beginning of our relationship. I couldn't be more happy to be an uncle. She was the cutest thing in the world to me. I tried to be that cool uncle to her and would always try to find time for her. My sister would regularly bring her over to my place for me to babysit when she had something going on. My girlfriend, to my knowledge,

also seemed to get along fine with her and wouldn't be against babysitting her with me. The best moment I shared with her was when my sister showed me a drawing my niece made about me in kindergarten. I was literally on the verge of tears seeing that. A year ago, my world turned upside down when my sister gave me a call, crying. That one sentence still rings in my head from time to time. She told me that my niece was diagnosed with leukemia. To say that I was devastated would be an understatement. This past year was really tough for all of us.

I spent most of my free time with my sister and brother-in-law in the hospital. Seeing that poor girl with all those tubes attached to her really broke my heart. I would regularly bring over balloons and make those balloon animals for her. As a result, I spent less time with my girlfriend. My girlfriend seemed like she understood until my niece's cancer grew worse. From Saturday to Sunday, I was either in the hospital or was drinking myself to sleep. One day, my girlfriend seemed to ignore me

on our three-year anniversary. I bought her flowers, a cake, and made her a card. My girlfriend, on the other hand, didn't get me anything. I pressed her about it, and that's when she said something that probably was a sign of what was to come. She told me, Well, it doesn't seem like you care, so why should I get something for someone who cares more about a child who's gonna die anyways? I don't know what she was expecting me to do, but I threatened to kick her out and tell everyone what she told me,

including my sister, who's a close friend of hers. She apologized and told me that she wasn't thinking straight, and something like this would never happen again. I eventually forgave her and we moved on. My niece passed away last week, and it's been the worst period of my life. I've basically been crying myself to sleep every day, and I've been spending a lot of time with my sister to console her. Something that caught me off guard, though, is that my girlfriend seemed a bit too happy at the news of my niece's passing. She just smiled and said, I'm so happy she isn't suffering anymore and is in a much better place now, with the big grin on her face. Yesterday, I overheard my girlfriend talking with one of her friends

over the phone. I had just come home from work and I guess she didn't hear me walk in. I just heard, a real man wouldn't cry unless it's his child dying. That caught me off guard and I kept listening. She said some awful things about me being a crybaby and how I shouldn't be so attached to a kid that isn't mine and so on. I loudly coughed to get her attention

and just saw the life draining from her face. She tried the whole, let me explain BS and I just told her to pack what's needed and I'll get her dad to come pick her up. After a solid hour of begging, she finally gave up and packed her things into a suitcase. Before leaving, she tried spitting at me but just ended up spitting on herself. Her mom called me a few hours later begging me to give her a second chance. I know that I shouldn't have said this, but I just told her to go f herself and her mentally unstable daughter.

I basically emptied half a bottle of Jack Daniels, then went to bed. I woke up today with texts from my sister. She told me my ex told her everything that happened and understood me kicking her out, but I should consider giving her a second chance. She told me that my ex seemed sincere in her apology to her. She asked what would- oh my god. Earlier in the story, I got to a part where I almost cried, because the idea of a little girl tied up in tubes kind of gets to me as a dad,

and now I find out that the girl's name is Lily. This is... Alright, okay. She asked what Lily would want. Lily is my niece. I'm not going to lie, that kind of broke me. My niece loved my girlfriend and would always run to her and ask her to play Barbie with her.

I feel like I shouldn't be upset if my sister forgave her, but at the same time, I feel hurt by her calling me a crybaby. Before the diagnosis, I've never really cried in front of her and her comments hurt me deeply. I feel like I can never open up to anyone again, let alone her. Am I being irrational here? Alright, something that sticks out to me as really odd is that both your girlfriend OP and your girlfriend's mother and your sister are all saying that you should give this woman a second chance But you did already give her a second chance

Remember when she said that absolutely disgusting thing to you during your anniversary about how you shouldn't care about a kid Who's gonna die anyways, then you forgave her that is the second chance I don't even know why you would want this girl in your life in any capacity because she's clearly deeply disinterested in supporting you through a low point in your life. So if she's not going to stand by you during these troubled times, how can you possibly expect her to stand by you if you get cancer or if your kid gets cancer or if your sister dies or if you lose your job or any other number of terrible things that can happen in a person's life.

OP, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving your girlfriend 4 out of 5 buttholes. Someone who lightly jokes and criticizes the death of a child is subhuman. Am I the butthole for telling my girlfriend that I'm going to break up with her if she doesn't find a job? I'm a 27-year-old man, telling my girlfriend that I'm gonna break up with her if she doesn't find a job? I'm a 27 year old man and my girlfriend is 25. We've been living together for two years. We also have no kids.

I'm currently working, however, my girlfriend just quit her job three months ago. She said the people she worked with were toxic. Thankfully, I make enough to keep the lights on, but it's been hard with her not working. Hard to buy food and other needs when I'm throwing my entire check at the bills. I brought this up multiple times to her that it's time for a new job, and she says no good jobs are hiring at the moment. She says this every time. I've been frustrated recently because I'm having to work overtime because of this, so

I sternly brought this up to her. That she needs to find a job, because I can't keep working overtime just because she isn't working. It's hard to support her and myself like this. We went back and forth, and she said that I could take up a second job. That dealing with toxic people at her work was mentally draining her and she didn't want it to happen again. She said she wanted to be a stay-at-home girlfriend. I told her she's insane for saying that, and that if she doesn't find a job, then I would break up with her. She lost her mind, told me men are the ones that take care of their partner.

We haven't spoken much since, and she's very pissed off at me. I don't know if it was too harsh to say that to her. Yo, OP, you're supposed to go work TWO jobs so that she can stay home by herself and do nothing? Like you wouldn't even see her at that point! Eight hours followed by another eight hour shift, then you go to sleep? Your whole life would be dedicated to just paying this woman's bills. It's funny that she doesn't want to work with toxic people, but then she herself is toxic towards you and expects you to just suck it up.

OP, please get out of there. You're young, you've got a good hit on your shoulders, just move on man. I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes, your girlfriend gets 2 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for rejecting the worst name ever for our offspring? So my husband and I are expecting our first child, a bouncing baby girl due in a few months. We were both over the moon when we found out the gender, but now things have gotten complicated to say the least. See, when we first started talking about names, the boy name was immediately decided.

Stuart Jr. after my husband. No problem there. It's a classic name and carries family meaning. But for a girl, things got murky. My husband suggested Stu- Stuarta. No, you're not having a stroke. Apparently, his logic is that since Stuart ends in a T, then we can just add an A to

make it feminine. I tried explaining why that doesn't quite work, how it sounds more like a furniture brand than a human name, how she'd be endlessly correcting people and explaining its origin. He's adamant though, says it honors him while giving our daughter a unique name. I've suggested alternatives, feminine names that maybe share a similar sound or meaning to Stuart, names he's mentioned liking in the past, even just going back to the drawing board entirely. But he's fixated on Stuarta. Stuartta. Stuartta? Stuartta. Stuartta. I think it's Stuartta. Now, I love

my husband dearly, and I understand wanting to honor family, but I can't imagine subjecting our daughter to a lifetime of awkward stares and endless questions about her unusual name. I also worry about potential bullying and the impact that it could have on her self-esteem. So am I the jerk for refusing to budge on Stuartta? I love this top comment from Tempting Penguin. Not the butthole. Stuartta sounds like a pharmaceutical product. I can hear the commercials now. In some cases, Stewarta can cause headaches, rashes, and even death. I just go for Stewart as a middle name. Yeah, I agree, OP. I'm

giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving your husband 1 out of 5 buttholes. But he's a stupid idiot. Am I the butthole for waiting out my prenup before divorcing my cheating wife? My wife settled for me. I didn't know it when I married her, but I do now. She was in love with her high school boyfriend whom her parents hated. She was with him all through university. Her parents finally told her that they would cut her off financially if she stayed with him. We met soon afterwards and I fell in love. She did not. Once again, I didn't know this at the time. We had a prenup that our parents insisted on.

I was in it for the long haul, so I had no problem with it. I would basically get nothing if we divorced before we were married for ten years. After that, everything would be evenly split, as long as I was not the cause of the divorce. She was banging her old boyfriend our entire marriage. I found out after we were married for eight years. I was angry and depressed. I'd spent eight years supporting her and her career. She has a much better paying job than I do.

It's high profile and she deals with our government a lot. I decided that I could handle two years of infidelity. I'd already done eight unknowingly. I filed for divorce on the day after our tenth anniversary. I let her parents pay for our vacation. I didn't do anything dirty like send the evidence I had to her parents. I just had a lawyer draft a claim for a divorce. Included was the evidence that the prenup had lapsed and our holdings were to be split. She said that I blindsided her after our holiday away.

She doesn't understand why I would do that. I said that I just don't think we're compatible anymore. I'm prepared to go nuclear if I have to. But I don't want our kids. Yeah, they're my kids. I checked, knowing why. I'm keeping the evidence I have on her boyfriend in my pocket. I can blow up his marriage and make her parents pissed at her if I absolutely must.

I just prefer to end things with me in a decent financial position to take care of the kids. Am I the butthole for what I did? OP, not only are you not a butthole here, but even if you used the evidence to completely destroy her life and dismantle her relationships, you still wouldn't be the butthole. I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes, I'm giving your wife 4 out of 5 buttholes. That was r slash mi the butthole and if you like this content be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new reddit podcast episodes every single day.