rSlash - r/AITA My Brother Stole My Engagement Ring

Episode Date: October 18, 2023

0:00 Intro 0:05 Engagement ring 3:31 Helping out 8:45 Giving birth 10:57 Take back 14:42 Implications Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

These side marios all you can eat is all you can munch a soup salad and garlic home Me Shopped Amazon for last minute gifts great deals for everyone on your list if store moment If store dad even for you sister and your brother chat Ah shoot, we didn't realize you're supposed to get a gift for our dog, what her guy. We almost forgot about her that disbarked a curve. We didn't expect to get a gift from her. Or our cousin might forget his name.

He got us something nice, better as it pertains. For last minute deals I give some people you forgot. Get faster, free shipping at Amazon. Welcome to R-Slash. Am I the butthole where OP's brother steals his engagement ring. Am I the butthole for forcing my brother to buy me a new engagement ring? I'm a 26 year old man and I'm proposing to my 24 year old girlfriend on our fourth anniversary. I've been planning this for about a month and I picked the ring a couple of weeks ago. The one I got was on sale, so I managed to get it at a surprisingly low price.

Last weekend, I showed my 33-year-old brother about my plans and I showed him the ring. He told me that he was proposing to his girlfriend as well. The next day, my brother came to my apartment while my girlfriend was out. He asked me if he could borrow my ring to propose to his girlfriend. I thought that he was joking at first, but no. His plan was to propose to his girlfriend, explain that he was using my ring as a placeholder and then take her to pick out her own ring later. His reasoning was that he didn't want to spend too much money right away in case she didn't say yes. I have never heard of placeholder

rings, so I said no and the conversation moved on. On Tuesday, he proposed to his girlfriend with my ring. He had taken it before leaving my apartment. I got distracted at work and didn't notice that it was gone until his fiancee sent a picture of herself wearing the ring to our family group chat. I called him to ask about the ring and he immediately apologized instead that he'd keep his promise and give it back to me. But at this point, my girlfriend had seen the ring and his fiancee had posted about it

on social media, so it was pointless for me to propose using that same ring. We fought about it, and he confessed that while he told his fiancee the ring was a placeholder, he didn't tell her where he'd gotten it from. I felt more angry and betrayed about him going behind my back and taking the ring after I said no than the fact that he stole it. I also know as fiance enough to know that she wouldn't like to learn that her engagement ring had been stolen from me. So I told my brother I tell her the truth if he didn't buy me a new engagement ring. He fought against it for hours but finally

gave up and agreed. We went to a different jewelry store yesterday and I picked a new engagement ring. He fought against it for hours, but finally gave up and agreed. We went to a different jewelry store yesterday and I picked a new ring. I managed to stay in the price range, but the new one was still a hundred dollars more expensive. My brother bought the ring, but it's still accusing me of being inconsiderate and childish. He's insistent that he would have given me the ring back had I given him the opportunity and I didn't need to threaten him to spend so much money on me. He's now refusing to talk to me. I don't know how I feel about this anymore. I'd usually talk to my brother about these things and it's a real that he's the one that

I'm fighting. I can't tell my fiancee and many of our friends overlap. The only other person who knows about this is our mom, who's divided. She thinks what my brother did was wrong and I'm right to be pissed at him, but I didn't have to stoop as low as I did by threatening his relationship. Am I the butthole? Yo OP, your brother literally stole the ring, so why was he fighting with you saying, well I don't want to replace the ring, So what's the alternative? That he just keeps it forever for free?

Your brother created this mess by lying to you, stealing from you, and lying to his fiance. So he's the one who needs to clean it up. I'm 100% on your side OP. You get zero out of five buttles. I'm giving your brother 2.5 out of five buttles. My guess is that his original plan was to propose with your ring and then basically just

sweep it under the rug and hope that you would never mention it again and that way he would get a free engagement ring. Am I the butthole for not helping my brother with his daughters when his wife left him? I'm a 30 year old woman and I'm single and child free by choice. I date occasionally but I have no long term relationships. This is due to many reasons, like I love my freedom, I want to enjoy my life unencumbered with responsibilities, and I want to really focus on my career. My older brother, who's 34, got married when he was 26.

He has two daughters, ages 7 and 4. They had a traditional household. He wanted a partner who stayed home and looked out for the family while he earned money. His wife had apparently dreamed of being a homemaker and taking care of the kids. But during the last couple of years, she showed signs of hating it. She wanted to study more and work outside, build something of her own. But my brother refused to step up or help. I warned him once, but he told me it's none of my business how he runs his household.

I've kept my mouth shut since. His wife left him a month ago. She just wrote him a letter saying she can't do this and she wants to explore her life. She left the kids with him and basically vanished. We have no idea where she is. The thing is, my brother doesn't know how to do even the most basic things. He's the kind of guy who never changed a diaper or toasted bread. The moment that my brother found out that his wife left, he called my mother who rushed

in to save the day. She thought that it was short-term and my sister-in-law would be back, but so far she hasn't. My father is unwell and needs his wife home soon. They live hours away. My brother suggested that she take the kids home with her. My dad said no. He's retired and they're both getting old. He doesn't want to have kids in the house full time taking up their time and energy.

Since that was a no-go, my brother asked me to either move in with them to help out or take the kids in with me. I refused. From where I stand, he's a grown adult and these kids are his responsibility. I made a choice to live the way I do and I don't want to sacrifice my life for his choices. My family is pressuring me, saying stuff like how my brother doesn't know how to take care of the kids, the little girls need a woman in their life, how family helps family, et cetera. My brother is calling me cold-hearted

for not even trying to help him. Am I the butthole? All right, let's be super, super clear. Your brother doesn't want you to help him. He wants you to be a full-time mom-slash-made-slash-nanny. He wants you to literally take his children and raise them so he can just do whatever he wants, I guess. Your brother is hilariously incompetent. Also, OP posted a pretty long

update to see where this is going. A lot of comments are asking OP why nobody filed a missing person's report and OP was basically like, you're right, maybe I should have, so the post continues. I called my sister-in-law's mom. She didn't sound worried or sad, so I was even more suspicious. I asked if she knew where my sister-in-law was. She said that they didn't know that my sister-in-law didn't say anything to them. I told her that I'd be filing a missing person's report today then, so that we know she's safe.

Her mom panicked and told me not to do that. That my sister-in-law will come home when she's ready. I told her that I have to file a report unless I know that she's safe. She kept insisting that I don't have to. It was very suspicious. Five minutes after my call, I got a call from an unknown number. It was my sister-in-law. She was panicking and more or less begged me not to file a report.

Turns out she was in another state crashing with distant family. She really did just when I go to college and my brother wasn't letting her. She had a huge fight with him about all this the week before she left. She was really depressed and feeling stuck. Her parents loamed her some cash through a church friend who also helped her get away. She begged me not to file a report, saying that he'll sue her for child support, and she can barely support herself and to go to college. I told her that abandoning her kids was wrong. She was crying when she said that she knows that, and she hopes they can forgive her.

She really couldn't live this life anymore. Leaving them was the hardest decision she ever made, but she felt that it was better than taking them and letting them starve with her. At least here, they have home and family. I did ask her why she didn't just divorce my brother then. She said that she didn't have money for a lawyer or anything. No home to return to. She's not proud of it, but she just couldn't stay in fight. I did tell her kids a situation. My sister-in-law said that my brother will figure it out, that she can't help in any way right now. She'll come back to her babies when she can. Okay OP, I'm giving you 0 out of 5

buttholes, I think you did pretty much everything right here. I'm giving the husband 3.5 out of 5 buttholes because he's a terrible father and even worse husband. Also, you guys might think this is too harsh, but I'm giving the wife 3.5 out of 5 buttholes too. While I can definitely sympathize with wanting to change her life, the way she did it is not appropriate at all. You can't just vanish on your family. It's not safe, it's disrespectful, and it can cause some major trauma for the

kids. Am I the butthole for not taking my youngest children on their weekend because my oldest daughter had a baby? I'm a 40-year-old man, and I've been married to my wife Cindy off and on. We had a child together who's now 17. We had a rocky spot in our marriage, and we split up for a few years, where I met a woman named Stacey. Me and Stacey were together for a while, having twins together who are currently 12 years old. Stacey and I split up because she ended up being unfaithful. Two years later, I reconciled with Cindy and I now get my twins every weekend due to our work schedules. This past weekend, my oldest daughter went into early labor. It was also my weekend with the twins.

I told Stacey on the way to the hospital that because of the labor, I wouldn't be able to take the twins this weekend. I put my phone on silent and away due to a lot going on. When I returned to my phone, I had a bunch of texts from Stacey saying how I needed to go home and be with my twins and how Cindy could handle the situation.

I told her absolutely not that I wasn't missing the birth of my grandchild. She then responded angrily, saying that I was picking my oldest daughter over my youngest, and how wrong that was since they can only see me on the weekends anyways. I tried texting and calling multiple times throughout the weekend, getting no responses. Am I the butthole? Alright, this one's pretty easy. The birth of your first grandchild is a potentially once-in-a-lifetime event. Also, OP specified that this is early labor. We don't know how early, so potentially this could be extremely

dangerous. In any event, we have definitely shifted over into emergency territory. So, for the most part, OP, I am definitely on your side that you should have been there for your grandkids birth. I could understand the argument that because it's your weekend, you're responsible for them, so you should have arranged some kind of babysitter or alternative care. But the problem is, like you said, this is early labor so it was completely unexpected. And any event OP, you get a pass on this one. Sometimes emergencies happen, and it's very unreasonable for your ex to not understand that.

I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving your ex 1 out of 5 buttholes for being unreasonable, and another 2 out of 5 buttholes for being a cheater. Am I the butthole for taking back a shawl that my wife made for a bride to be after she was uninvited from the wedding. My wife, Lena, crocheted, and she often gives them to friends and family. When her second oldest brother got married, she made a bride shawl to wear over her dress in the evening.

The bride loved it, and ever since, Lena has made shawls for everyone in her family getting married. Now Lena's oldest brother, George, is getting married again. Lena doesn't have a relationship with George because he was abusive to her as a child, but if she has to see him, then she's polite, but distant with him. She doesn't want to cut off the rest of the family because of George. I work with George, and while we aren't friends, we're friendly at work. Lena encouraged this. When George got moved to my team, I was going to request to transfer not wanting to expose Lena to George because my team does a lot of get-togethers

with our significant others. Because this is a family wedding, Lena's mom asked her if she could crochet a shawl for George's fiance and Lena agreed. It was arranged that once Lena finished it, I would take it to work to give to George so that Lena didn't have to see him. Earlier this week, the Shaw was completed and I emailed George at work to let him know that I would bring it by today because the wedding was tomorrow. When I got into work this morning, I gave George the Shaw and let him know that Lena and I were looking forward to the wedding. At lunchtime, Lena called me to let her know that George's fiancee had called her and told her that she was no longer invited to the wedding, saying that the venue was too small for the number of people they had coming, so they had to make cutbacks. However, I was still invited to the wedding.

I was mad at this because they clearly only invited Lena to get a shawl, which to me is just rude. If they had just outright asked Lena to make one, she probably would have because she loves to crochet. On my way out of work, I noticed George wasn't at his desk, but the shawl was. I was still mad they had used Lena to get a shawl so I just shoved it in my work back. I left a note on George's desk telling him that since Lena was no longer invited, the shawl and I would no longer be attending either. On my way home, I called Lena and told her what I did, and she was upset that I had taken the shawl because it was causing an uproar in her family group chat where people were calling her petty because I took it back.

Lena wants me to give it back, but I don't think I should. They don't deserve Lena's kindness. However, at the same time, I don't want Lena to be upset with me over George and Ashaal. Am I the butthole for taking back the shawl? Alright, I don't want to be too critical of Lena in this situation because Lena is kind of a victim here and she sounds like a sweetie pie, but Lena has no backbones. She is acting like a complete doormat here. So I'm not going to give Lena a butthole score, but she definitely does need to toughen up.

Even ignoring the fact that she was kicked out of the wedding, her making a shawl for her abuser is nuts! I can't understand her telling you not to transfer out of your team because that could affect your career, and that's like a really selfless caring thing for both you and her to do. It was very sweet of you to offer, and it was very sweet of her to say, no, you can stay at your current job. And as for your Butthole score OP, I'm giving you an easy zero out of five buttholes. All you're doing here is standing up for your partner, which is what everyone should do. You're right. Obviously, they only invited Lena as a scheme to get a free shawl and then uninvited her immediately after getting the shawl. Super scummy behavior.

I'm giving George's wife two out of five buttholes, and I'm giving George at least two out of five buttholes, possibly up to five out of five buttholes, because we don't know what kind of abuse he inflicted upon Lena when they were kids. So, I don't know, he's definitely a butthole. It's just not super clear how much of a butthole he is. Am I the butthole for implying to my co-worker that I please myself when my husband is away?

I've been at this company for about 2 years now, and one of my co-workers, John and I have become pretty good friends, and we get along well. We're both happily married and just friends, though we do catch up on life during work hours. My husband has been away on a business trip for 2 weeks now. John and I were chatting in the office this morning, and I mentioned to him that I've been at my house alone for the past week, and I'm pretty bored without my husband. He asked me what I do to pass the time, and that I must be a bit panned up with my husband gone for that long. I was surprised he said that, but I feel comfortable enough around him that

it didn't bother me, so I chalked it up to playful banter. I jokingly told him that I know exactly how to please myself when my husband is away. He got really awkward and uncomfortable and we've been distant since. I just checked my inbox and there was a meeting on my calendar from HR. I tried to message John, but he's not responding, and my manager came by my desk and told me that my behavior is ridiculous and to not speak to John until I'm told otherwise. Am I the butthole? All right, the comments on this one are a bit divided. There is quite a few not the buttholes and quite a few you are the buttholes. I'm confident that there's going to be some disagreement here.

So there's two issues here. One, are you the butthole and two are you being unprofessional? The unprofessional question is super easy, we'll tackle that first, you're both being unprofessional. He shouldn't have implied that you're horny and pent up and you shouldn't have implied that you pleasure yourself. So I think an HR meeting is somewhat understandable because yeah, you guys are unprofessional. Now as for the butthole score, you are absolutely not the butthole because all you did was return John's energy. He's the one who started it by implying that you're horny, so you completed the joke by implying that you play with yourself.

OP's response is very logical and normal. This just feels like playful banter between friends. But apparently in John's world, he can imply sexual things, but you can't, I guess, because you're a woman, and woman must be chased and virginal at all times. So for that, I'm giving Jon one out of five buttholes for being a hypocrite, and I'm giving you zero out of five buttholes,

because even though you were unprofessional, he started it. You just returned the same energy. Also, OP posted an update, which is very dry, but basically, OP went to the HR meeting. She OP posted an update which is very dry, but basically OP went to the HR meeting, she convinced him that it was just a misunderstanding, and that's basically it. OP is just going to avoid John from here on out. That was our slash of my The Butthole, and if you liked this content be sure to follow

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