rSlash - r/AITA My Family Helped My Stalker Attack Me

Episode Date: September 13, 2024

0:00 Intro 0:08 Not my kid 4:16 Reproduction 7:04 Stalker 10:02 Weird kid 12:21 Comment 12:47 Vacation home Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to r slash am I the butthole where OP is expected to pay $40,000 for his cheating ex's baby. Am I the butthole for refusing to pay delivery and maternity expenses for the child? About 11 months ago, I, a 28-year-old guy, found out that my 24-year-old girlfriend was cheating on me. We'd been together for 4 years and lived together for almost 2. I thought that we had a great relationship. We got along well, regular weekly dates, traveled a lot together, and had tons of plans for our future together. We'd even talked about me proposing as soon as she got her finances in order. However, I found out that she was sleeping

with a guy who's friends with a best friend's boyfriend. I told her to kick rocks and that I never wanted to see her again. She moved out and moved in with her female best friend and her boyfriend. During that time, she never told her family that we broke up or no longer lived together. A few weeks after she moved out, she reached out and told me that she was pregnant and that she's certain that it's mine because the time she cheated, they used condoms. For context, my father passed away when I was a child and I have very few memories of him and as a result this affected me for a long time. I told her that when the kid is born and confirmed to be mine, I'll take care of everything. Until then, leave me alone. A few weeks later we met up and she swore that the baby is mine and she said

that I should help cover maternity and pregnancy stuff. I told her to keep receipts of everything you spend on pregnancy and maternity stuff. After the kid is born, if it's mine, I'll cut you a check and cover all expenses. If it's not, then we'll part ways. She agreed. She then proceeded to get a midwife and a doula for herself. Both of which are pretty expensive.

She decided on a home birth. Come time for the birth, the baby came early and there were complications. So she was rushed to the hospital for an emergency c-section. And the baby was kept in NICU. The day of the birth, I went to see her and a nurse took me to see the baby. Two weeks ago, she sent me receipts for everything. And it totaled over $40,000 and she asked for money to pay the doula and the midwife. I told her to wait for the DNA results. Well, turns out I am NOT the father.

I told her, I'm sorry, but you're on your own. She cried and said she and the child are ruined if I don't step up and help them and went on about how we can have a successful relationship together and raise the kid and how she's matured and she'll be a good partner. I told her I have no interest in raising someone else's child and to call on the real father. Well, the real father is broke and is a cashier at the local store. Now everyone in her family is trying to convince me to at least pay off the 40k before going our separate ways. I said no. Am I the butthole for refusing to

step up here? Then OP posted an update. I had to lawyer up. She's still pushing the did beat dad narrative and is painting me as the bad guy. Then OP posted another update. Since I had to get a lawyer, I blocked her and everyone in her circle. I shared the DNA results with my family and friends and they were all baffled by her brazenness. Some of them even had a good laugh, especially my mom who never liked her that much. My lawyer told my ex that she needs to fix what she's done and clear my name or we would sue her among other things. Last night she made a post on Facebook telling everyone that she and I haven't been together for nearly a year and that the child, in fact, is not mine. She made another post and

tagged the guy who's supposedly the father. She messaged me on WhatsApp. I hadn't blocked her there. She apologized and said that she was desperate and angry at herself for cheating. And she wished that she had never cheated on me. And she wished that I was the father and she said that she hoped that maybe we can be friends. I never answered her message and I don't plan on it. So let me get this straight. She cheated on you and now you're supposed to pay her $40,000? Yeah right. OP, you get 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving your cheating ex 3.5 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for not being on speaking terms with my wife after she divorced me 5 years after

making me get a vasectomy? I'm a 32 year old man and my ex wife is 32. We finalized our divorce proceedings last year. We had a kid when we were 21, got married at 25, and at 26 my wife made me get a vasectomy because she didn't want any more kids. I was hesitant because I always wanted more kids, but for the sake of our marriage, I decided to get a vasectomy and my wife was very happy about it. However, our marriage went through its ups and downs and we both amicably decided on a divorce because we weren't compatible. Even after the divorce, we were on good speaking terms and we were good friends.

However, a month after finalizing our divorce proceedings, I went to the doctor to check if my vasectomy could be reversed. And after evaluating everything, the doctor told me that it couldn't be reversed. I was devastated and really regretted listening to my wife many years ago who made me get this vasectomy and who also then divorced me later. I took a week off work because I was really struggling with this news and I built up a lot of resentment towards my ex-wife. But for the sake of our son, I acted like everything was normal. However, I decided a week later after speaking to my sister that I needed a clean break from

my ex-wife and to cut off all communication with her even though she was my son's mother. My sister let my ex-wife know this. The co-parenting arrangement would still be the same and I would drop by and pick off my son. But if my ex-wife attempted to even say anything or speak to me, I would go to the same and I would drop by and pick off my son. But if my ex-wife attempted to even say anything or speak to me, I would go to the courts and the co-parenting arrangement could then become extremely complicated. Any further communication with me would be via my sister. It's been almost a year since this arrangement and my son asks me occasionally why I don't speak

to his mom anymore. He told me that he's seen his mom crying many times, especially after I drop him off. And when he asks her about it, she says nothing. My sister tells me that my ex-wife is very remorseful about it. And if she could take it back, she would. And my ex-wife has asked multiple times if we could at least communicate normally because she misses talking to me. But I will never go back on that, especially since I've now been dating my current girlfriend for a few months and we're becoming serious.

Am I the butthole? OP, honestly, it sounds like you need therapy, man. You say your wife made you get a vasectomy, but I mean, she can't make you do it. It would have had to have been a joint decision at minimum. And it sounds like you both decided to get divorced, so you're just kind of blaming a lot of this on your wife. Yeah, it's a really sucky situation and you have a right to be upset about it. But not talking to your son's mother just because you're angry about her feels a little

extreme here, so I think you need therapy, dude. Am I the butthole for blaming my family for my stalker finding and sexually assaulting me? I'm a 26 year old woman and a few months ago, I married a wonderful man, Liam, who's 28. We bought a house together just after he proposed. He's kind and honest, compassionate, empathetic and the most genuine person I've ever met. He makes me feel safe.

Unfortunately, I have a dark past that I've tried to leave behind. Liam knows about it and he's been my rock. My ex was extremely abusive and manipulative. He hit me, threw things at me, and sexually assaulted me multiple times via coercion, stealing, and drugging me with sleeping pills. After I left him, I did everything I could to erase any trace of myself online, hoping to start fresh and protect myself. I still don't have any social media. Things were going well, until recently. My mother is very active on social media, particularly Facebook where she shares everything

about our lives. Without my permission, she posted multiple pictures of our new home, inside and out, publicly on her profile. I had specifically told her not to share these photos, but she insisted that it was her way of celebrating our new milestone. A few weeks later, which is two months ago currently, my ex found me. He started stalking me again in person and despite several restraining orders, things escalated. He eventually broke into our home and assaulted me physically and sexually.

I had a dislocated jaw, my femur was fractured and I had internal bleeding. He left behind DNA evidence and he'll likely go to jail. During the event, he told me that I was a ruined whore who deserved it and that I brought this all on myself because I was a stupid c-word. I've been in a horrible place since then and I've blamed my family, especially my mom for this. I believe that if she hadn't posted those photos, my ex would have never found me. My family, however, insists that I'm being unreasonable and that I'm just looking for someone to blame.

They said that my ex would have found me anyway and that I can't put this on them. I'm questioning everything. I feel like I'm losing my mind because deep down, I believe they're partially responsible for what happened. But I'm starting to think that they may be right, that I shouldn't blame anybody but him and myself. I think he's right and that I moved on too quick and too loudly. I feel like a mess and it feels like therapy isn't helping.

Am I the butthole? OP, you should absolutely cut your mother out of your life. What she did was bad enough, but on top of that she clearly has no remorse or guilt or she didn't even apologize which means more than likely she'll just do it again. OP, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving your stalker 5 out of 5 buttholes and your mother 3.5 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for telling a parent that their kid is weird when she pushed as to why my kid didn't want to be her friend?

My family and I moved to the States. It's been a hard move, especially for my oldest daughter, Cattie. She's in 6th grade. The area's school district has a Facebook account that parents are a part of. I introduced myself on there a while ago. We put Cattie on the cross-country team and she's been making friends over the summer. I got a message from a parent last week asking to meet up and let their kids meet. They would be in the same grade and I thought it'd be a good opportunity.

We met up yesterday at the local pool. I met the child, Melanie, and she wouldn't make eye contact, was very soft spoken, and overall didn't seem to be paying attention. The kids were playing while I talked to the mom. She's always lived in the area and was excited that her kid was getting a friend. Cady came up to me asking to leave since she wasn't feeling well. We left early and in the car, she admitted to just wanting to get away from Melanie. She explained that Melanie freaked her out, that she was very touchy, kept pushing her in the water and was whispering, as in saying things under her breath, that she would stare

at people and make comments, comparing people to bugs. I'm still confused about what that means. So, Caddy told me that she was uncomfortable and doesn't want to hang out with her again. The parent messaged me and asked when they could do it again. I told her that the girls didn't mesh well and that we'll have to decline. She then called me asking me what I meant by that. I told her that Catty wasn't interested in hanging out since they don't mesh together. I was trying to be polite about it. This went on for a while and she told me that kids just need to be around each other.

I told her no. Eventually, she asked to talk to my husband which is when I snapped. I told her no and that I was trying to be polite but your kid is weird. That Melanie makes my kid uncomfortable and I don't know what the hell is up with her but we will not have another playdate. She went on Facebook and it's now going around that how the new family in town are jerks. Her post seems to not be going anywhere, but I'm wondering if I was a dick. I'm gonna read this top reply from Floating Pencil because they echo pretty much exactly what I was thinking.

She asked to speak to your husband? As in, she thought that was the social equivalent of asking for the manager? Let me speak to the person in charge of you, basically. Nope, absolutely not. Not the butthole. My guess would be that there's a reason why her daughter evidently doesn't have any friends, and at least some of it originates with the mother. OP, you get 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving the other mom 1.5 out of 5 buttholes.

Am I the butthole for kicking my sister's boyfriend out of my vacation home? My husband Kai and I own a vacation home on Lake Michigan. We both own it, technically, but it was his before we got married. This becomes relevant later. My sister, Leah, has been using our vacation home since Kai and I started dating. We don't mind. She's always clean and courteous and leaves it better than she found it. However, she started dating her boyfriend Al about a year ago and I can't say the same for him.

Al is a total slop. He leaves dirty dishes and empty bottles everywhere and expects Leah to clean up. He has split custody of two young kids from his ex who he just lets run free, expecting Leah to do the work even though they're his kids. On top of that, he's told Leah to get him a beer while she's busy and he's watching TV a few times in front of Kai and me. So I can't imagine how he treats her when we're not around. Their house is always a mess because Leah works 60 hours a week and doesn't have the

time to take care of two small kids and Al clean and work long hours a week and doesn't have the time to take care of two small kids and Al clean and work long hours. Yet somehow, Leah really loves Al. She looks at him like he's the only man in the world. When she talks about him, her eyes light up and her voice is sweet and melodic. That's why when Leah asked if she and Al could use the vacation home this week, I said yes. I figured, what's

the worst that could happen? Plus, Kai and I already planned on going three days after them, so we'd overlap. When my husband and I got there, the vacation house was a pigsty. It smelled like rotting food. There was a mountain of dirty dishes in the sink. The floor was sticky and there were drawings on the walls with crayons. We got to the living room where, lo and behold, Leah was scrambling to pick up toys and Al was drinking a beer in a rocking chair. I immediately snatched the beer from his hand and asked him why he wasn't cleaning the mess that he made. He asked, why do you assume that I made the mess and not Leah? I said that it's because I'm not an

idiot. He just chuckled and said Leah was doing the cleaning and there didn't need to be two people cleaning. His nonchalance really ticked me off. So I told him that he and his sticky kids had an hour to pack up their things and leave before I called the cops. Al looked at Kai and Kai was like, what are you looking at me for? Go pack! At this point, Leah was really upset with me. They said they were looking forward to unwinding and I walked in and ruined it in 5 minutes, not even considering other resolutions to the conflict.

Plus that I had no claim to the house since I didn't buy it myself. I told her there is no conflict. Al is dead, Wade, and that's that. And as for the house, Kai owns it and he's with me. She said, well, if Al's leaving, I'm leaving too. That night, I got a call from my mom asking why I kicked Leah out. I told her I kicked Al out and Leah followed. My mom told me that I need to be more accepting of new members of the family and that not everyone has the same living style as me. Now she's mad and Leah won't talk to me.

Was I the butthole in this situation? Yo, how can you bring kids into someone's house and have them draw on the walls and then just sit around and act like it's not your problem? Like it's not a big deal and then get mad at them when you get kicked out? What the actual entitlement with these people? I wouldn't just kick them out, OP. I would permanently ban them from your vacation home. I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving Al 2.5 out of 5 buttholes and your sister 1.5 out of 5 buttholes. That was r slash am I the butthole and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new reddit podcast