rSlash - r/AITA My Husband Makes Me Soil My Pants

Episode Date: July 5, 2024

0:00 Intro 0:06 Humiliation 3:58 Diet 8:43 Wife's sister 10:30 Birth plan 13:32 Comment 13:45 Marriage stress Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Okay, you can do this. I know, I know. Carvana makes it so convenient to sell your car. It's just hard to let go. My car and I have been through so much together. But look, you already have a great offer from Carvana. That was fast. Well, I know my lessons played into my heart,

and those questions were easy. You're almost there. Now to just accept the offer and schedule a pick-up or drop-off. How'd you do it? How were you so strong in letting go of your car? Well, I already made up my mind, and Carvana's so easy. Oh yeah, true.

And sold. Go to carvana.com to sell your car the convenient way. Welcome to r slash am I the butthole, where OP's husband literally tortures her. Am I the butthole for telling my mom how my husband humiliated me? I'm a 24-year-old woman, and my husband is 34. So as I was leaving work, I called my husband and asked him to please fill up the Brita

water filter since he leaves it empty a lot of the time. My water bottle for the day was empty and I was thirsty, that's all. Well he had an attitude on the phone because apparently he had already done it and I was nagging. I told him it's not nagging when 99% of the time it's not full. So when I got home, I chugged some water and sat down for a while. About an hour later he got into the shower. I heard him taking a shower in there and I really had to pee. I knocked on the door, which is usually never a problem, but he wouldn't let me in, so I waited. Ten minutes, 20, 30, 40 minutes passed and he's still not out.

By that time, I was on the verge of wetting my pants so I banged on the door. He told me, Oh well, you made your bid by being rude over the water so now you have to lie in it. I was so angry that I said, Fine, F you and I stormed towards the door to go to the store and use their bathroom. My husband literally raced over to me and manhandled me into our bedroom. I don't like where this is going. He locked me in there for another two hours? What? I peed my pants in there because I had no choice. It was that bad. I was absolutely wailing when he finally let me out and I didn't even stop to change before I grabbed my keys and went to my mom's house. It's been 15 years since

I cried in my mom's arms like that. I was effing mortified, enraged, hurt, everything. I didn't go back that night and I haven't gone back since. It's been two days. My husband called me to apologize and has promised me a million and one ways's been two days. My husband called me to apologize and has promised me a million and one ways that he's gonna make it up to me. That was until he found out that I told my mom what happened. He yelled at me for it. I don't know what to do. I feel so bad for breaking our trust like that. But then again, he literally humiliated me over some argument about a Britta. Dude, what? You just called up your boyfriend and was like, hey, can you do me a favor? And his response was to try to torture you for over half an hour and then pick you up?

I guess either pick you up or drag you into your bedroom and lock you in there for more torture, extended torture. OP, you said, uh, am I the butthole for telling my mom how my husband humiliated me? Let's be super clear. This isn't humiliation. This is definitely abuse and borderline torture. I know torture is kind of a big word to throw out there, but I mean, what else do you call forcing someone

to endure two hours of pain, two hours and 40 minutes of pain actually, just to prove a point I guess to get revenge, that's pretty brutal. This is absolutely the end of the relationship OP. There is no coming back from this whatsoever. Girl, he tortured you! You get 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving your husband… gosh what's fair here you guys. I want to say 4.5 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving your husband… gosh, what's fair here you guys?

I want to say… 4.5 out of 5 buttholes? Also, OP posted an update. I'm so confused and so hurt to learn that literally the majority of people think that my husband abuses me. I don't think he does, but I've been doing a lot of reflecting. My mom is still with me, and my husband and I have had a long conversation at her home. He suggested therapy. I think I'm going to try. Thank you for all of your concern. Yo OP, I've been with my wife for like 13 years.

I have literally never manhandled her and locked her into a room. I've never forced her to endure pain. This is absolutely abuse. This is absolutely torture and you need to run, not walk away from this relationship. Am I the butthole for lying to my stepdaughter that the soup she loves is lactose and gluten free for 6 months? So I'm a 35 year old woman and my stepdaughter, who's 15, lives with us every other week.

For the past year, she's been a nightmare when it comes to food. First, she became vegan, which I have no problem with. I just make her food sans animal products, but that didn't stick with her and that's normal too. Now she's holistic and she started having allergies from everything. Salted nuts, lactose, processed foods, gluten, red meat, mustard, mushrooms, and anything else that loser Instagram influencers make money by telling people is dangerous. I had enough when she started demanding that I separate her cookware even in the dishwasher. I had to separate her food in the fridge and freezer.

I had to take out all my salted nuts and sugars and throw them in the trash because she complained about stomach pain that she attributed to contamination from the pantry. I told her that she could either eat outside or do her own cooking and cleaning from now on. She started raging, saying that I was treating her differently from the rest of the family and that I'm the evil stepmother. Wait, what? Hold on, isn't that literally what she wanted?

She wants to be treated differently, doesn't she? By getting special food? And she's complaining, huh? My husband started yelling at me. I asked him to take her to do an allergy screening and seek mental help for eating disorders. And surprise surprise, she had no allergies. But her answer was that this doesn't matter and what really matters is what she believed. That her stomach ache was actually a real thing. So yeah, I can't have anything in my house now and I have to make her food in an almost separate kitchen.

I had enough. I started putting gluten and lactose in almost everything that she ate, especially the chicken soup that she loves so much. She's been eating this for the past 6 months. Recently, her mom dropped her off one day and she stayed in for coffee. She mentioned that, actually, her daughter's health had been much better since these new kitchen rules. I just said, really? She feels better? The daughter yelled at me, yes, I don't have stomach issues anymore. I calmly said, great, I wonder what changed because you've been eating the same food as the rest of us over the past months, especially the chicken soup that you love so much.

She started yelling and throwing things off the shelves and her mother started yelling at me too and they left. My husband was angry at me and called what I did reckless because she's refusing to live with us now. And I said, great, if you want her to live with you then you can move the hell out too. They filed a lawsuit against me but it'll get dropped the minute the judge looks at the case. My husband is so angry at me but I will not change my mind. If he wants his daughter to live with him, then he should move out and be with her. And I would actually understand if he chose his daughter over me.

Now my stepdaughter demands that I apologize and divide the kitchen to two areas if she ever is to live with us again because she's been having stomach problems since I started feeding her normal food. I urged my husband and his ex to seek mental help for her, but I told them that she's not welcome in my home. I am a nurse and I work almost, wow, 60 hours a week. So setting aside time to make food and clean is a luxury for me. And I'll be damned if I start to abide by the rules of a superficial teenager with mental issues and delusions. While reading this, I was wondering in the back of my mind if OP also has a typical 40-hour job. And no, she's working 60 hours a week and she still does all the cooking?

Not just all the cooking, but she's expected to cook two versions of every meal and 60 hours? OP is literally supermom in this story. She's doing it all, making money, cooking, cleaning, and they're yelling at her? The husband yells at OP, the daughter yells at OP, the ex-wife yells at OP, and OP's like, what more do you people want from OP, man? And what I don't understand is, if the daughter is so stressed about her food, then why doesn't SHE cook? Why doesn doesn't she cook? Why doesn't your dad cook?

Why doesn't the ex-wife pre-packaged meals and do meal planning and send all the meals over to OP's place? Why is it entirely on OP's s- man, OK, I'm getting I'm getting really frustrated on behalf of OP. The story was already bad enough on its own. I was already on OP's side, but once I learned that she worked 60 hours a week, I'm like, OP, you gotta get out of this relationship. OP, you get zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving everyone else three out of five buttholes.

Am I the butthole? My pregnant wife's sister offered to sleep with me. So my wife and I have been together for about three years, married for six months now. We're both 24 years old. We found out that we're going to be parents and we're both very excited. We told our families over the weekend and everyone was happy for us. This morning I got a text from my wife's sister, who's 21, saying that she knows that women can get emotionally and physically abusive and can put a stop to intimacy during

pregnancy and she's willing to help me out anytime sexually or emotionally during and after the pregnancy. Obviously, I have no interest in anyone other than my wife. But how do I tell my wife what her sister offered? My wife has always been there for her sister and they've always been super close. Her sister was the maid of honor at our wedding. I don't want my wife to lose that bond and it would destroy her if she found out that her sister was willing to

betray her like that. At the same time, her sister is a snake and is willing to ruin our marriage and the life of her soon to be nephew or niece for what I'm guessing is a childish crush on me. How do I approach this situation? There's literally no good outcome. I could tell my wife tonight, but she'll be absolutely devastated. I'll always be there for her, and I know that her parents will be on her side. But losing a 20 year bond with her own sibling while in such a vulnerable state sounds terrible. OP, there literally isn't time to be concerned about this. You have to tell your wife as soon as possible because if the sister feels rejected, she

might try to spin this as this was your idea. So OP, you get 0 out of 5 buttholes. Don't waste time, just rip off the band-aid. I'm giving the sister-in-law 3.5 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for telling my brother-in-law and his wife that I don't want to follow their birth plan? So I'm a 34 year old woman and I'm the surrogate for my brother-in-law Simon who's 39 and his wife Michelle who's 38.

Simon and Michelle have struggled with infertility for years. They've tried IVF and even surrogacy before, but the person changed her mind at the last seconds. They've outwardly shown their jealousy of my husband James and me for having children, especially since only one of them was planned and our oldest was born when we were 16. They came to me last year and begged me to be their surrogate. I had doubts, as did my husband, but I felt bad for them and decided to go through with it.

James supported my decision and has acted like he did with my previous pregnancies, sweet and caring. Simon and Michelle, on the other hand, are very controlling. They made up meal plans for me and I'm taking all these supplements as well as attending multiple classes. When I told them that I knew what to do during pregnancy, they didn't listen and said to me that just because I was pregnant four times before doesn't mean that I'm an expert. I gave up trying to dissuade them as I knew that nothing would work. We started going over the birth plan earlier this week and it caused a huge argument. They wanted me to do an unmedicated water birth and I flat out refused.

For my second pregnancy, I didn't have enough time for any pain relief, and the pain was horrific. I have quite a high pain tolerance, but this experience was awful, and I never wanted to do that again. Kudos to anyone who has unmedicated births. And as for water birth, I didn't like the idea of being submerged in water with blood, other fluids, and possibly poop. They were not happy about this. They said this was their baby and they should decide how it was born. I retorted and said, this is my body and I should decide how I want to push out a human that I'm generously caring for them. A lot of shouting happened and I started to get overwhelmed very quickly. I started crying and Michelle rolled her eyes and told me to grow up.

My husband told her to shut up, which pissed off Simon and it was just a mess. James and I left the house and I was crying the whole way home and regretting ever agreeing to being their surrogate. It took James and me a few days to calm down and during those days, we didn't have any contact with Simon or Michelle. Simon and Michelle called James' parents and complained to them about what happened, so they called us and we explained our side of the story. His parents were shocked at what happened and said they were fully on our side and that they'd talk with Simon and Michelle.

I'm due in two weeks and I'm so nervous. A part of me doesn't want them there, but I know they have to be seeing as it's their child. James disagrees. He said that he'll have them kicked out if they do anything to upset or stress me out. I do sort of feel like a butthole, but I don't know, it's a hard time right now. I love this top comment, not the butthole. We want you to have an unmedicated birth, we know the pain will be hideous for you, but that's a sacrifice we're willing to make. OP, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. Your in-laws here are honestly nutso.

Am I the butthole for telling my wife that I won't be as stressed out next year because I won't be married to her? I'm a 32 year old guy, and I've been married to my wife, Jen, who's 32 for a little over 7 years now. Up until about 2 years ago, things were great. However, a disastrous move, a few family emergencies, and a totaled car have left us in a terrible financial situation. All of our savings are pretty much gone. Our 401ks are empty, and we're hemorrhaging money. Before we bought our house two years ago, things were amazing financially. We made the mistake of buying a nice three bedroom house because we planned on having kids. Those plans, thankfully, got put on the back burner

because adding a kid into this mess right now would kill us. It's not really a mystery why things are like this. Jen and I are both underpaid at our jobs. And we moved into a high cost of living area like morons. Last December, I told Jen that one of two things needed to happen. We either sell the house or start making more money. The latter would most definitely mean finding new jobs that would pay us a market rate. Jen pushed back on this because she loved the house and her current job. I told her she had to choose one and she couldn't have it both ways and after a week of arguing, she agreed that we would look for new jobs. It's been almost 6 months now.

Last Friday, I signed an offer for a new job. It's over a, wow, a $35,000 raise for me! Geez, congrats OP! Jen. Jen however has done nothing. In January, she asked for a raise to the market rate and was very disrespectfully told by her manager that she was not worth that. She was shown the door to leave if she wasn't happy. In Jen's eyes, she's done my requirement of putting in the effort and she's done nothing else ever since. I am not happy about this. When I came home Friday and told her that I got the job, she got pissy because I clarified

this doesn't mean that she can stay at her job. We fought AGAIN and I told her this would mean that we would only stop hemorrhaging money on the house. Even with my raise, we'd only be able to save a little bit, and we wouldn't be close to refilling our 401ks. And kids, the whole reason we got this damn house in the first place would be entirely off the table. We haven't talked much since then. Yesterday, her parents visited for dinner. Despite my best efforts to keep them out of it, Jen announced my new job to her parents by saying, maybe he'll stop complaining about money once I start.

I don't know why I said it, but I replied with, oh don't worry Jen, I won't have to worry about money a year from now because we'll be divorced by then. Things got quiet real quick after and I excused myself. Her parents left shortly after and she slept on the couch to avoid talking to me. I haven't talked to Jen or her parents since last night. Things are very cold between us right now and I genuinely wonder if I did something last night that probably ruined my marriage. Oooh, yeah, this feels like an everyone is a butthole situation here because yeah, Jin

is being super lazy and complacent, there's no argument there. OP is definitely carrying his own weight by getting a 35k raise. That is awesome. However, like Jen was venting, she was in a bad mood. Should she have done that during a family dinner? No. But OP, you way escalated things by jumping to divorce and embarrassing her in front of her parents. Every single person in a relationship has been in a situation where they have a little like lovers' quarrel in mixed company, but you don't resolve your lovers' spat by saying I'll just divorce you. That's just taking it too far, OP.

So I think everyone here gets 2 out of 5 buttholes. Your wife for being lazy and you for nuking the marriage in front of her parents just because you were in the middle of a fight. Also, clearly you guys need to sell the house because if a $35,000 raise still isn't enough to make you guys stop drowning, then you guys are way over your heads. 35k a year is a life-changing amount of money for a lot of people and for you it barely makes a dent, OP, so like, yo, you guys need a reality check. That was r slash amyethethebutthole and if you like this content, be sure to follow my barely makes a dent OP so like yo, you guys need a reality check.