rSlash - r/AITA My In-Laws Want to Use Piss Jugs in My House

Episode Date: September 3, 2025

0:00 Intro 0:07 Toilet 2:36 Dirty kids 6:03 Flaunting it 9:51 Wedding venue 12:52 Dinner Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When you're with Amex Platinum, you get access to exclusive dining experiences and an annual travel credit. So the best tapas in town might be in a new town altogether. That's the powerful backing of Amex. Terms and conditions apply. Learn more at Amex.ca. Welcome to R slash am I the butthole where O.P's in-laws want to pee into jugs. Am I the butthole for forcing my in-laws to use the toilet instead of piss jugs in my home?

You know, every once in a while you come across a post where just from the title alone, I feel like I can pass judgment, and I feel like this is going to be a pretty solid, not the but let's see. My in-laws are visiting my wife and I this week. The trip was short notice, so they'll be staying at our home. Our guest bedroom that they'll be staying in is in the basement of our house. It's spacious, clean, and dry. The only issue is that it doesn't have a bathroom associated with it. You have to walk up the basement stairs and halfway across the house to get to our guest bathroom.

Before arriving, my in-laws were complaining that it was too far of a walk to get to the bathroom from the basement. We're offering them free lodging, so I figured they would just have to deal with it. However, yesterday we got an unexpected Amazon package. My wife opened it and pulled out a strange plastic container. I joked that it looked like one of those medical device piss jugs. The joke was on me because it was exactly that. My in-laws had ordered a device for them to urinate into instead of going to the bathroom upstairs. I told my wife, absolutely not, and that they had to use a toilet.

My in-laws are very healthy and able-bodied people, and there is zero reason other than laziness for them to use a device like this. My in-laws arrived later yesterday night, and we confronted them about their plan to piss in the jug. They joked about the device and asked what else they were supposed to do, use a litter box. No, go upstairs and use the friggin' toilet! Now they're complaining about having to go all the way upstairs, and I'm pretty sure they're secretly, using the piss jug. I am going to flip if I find out that they're using it down there. Am I the butthole

for asking them to use a toilet like a normal human being? So clearly you're not the bottle here. I don't think anyone's going to argue with that. But you are a little bit dumb if you expect them to just go downstairs and not piss in a Coke bottle at this point. O.P., kick them out

and make them stay at a hotel where they can piss wherever they want, I guess. Isn't this a stupid thing to even speculate about? We all know they're pissing in jars down there. I'm amazed you even let them in the house. O.P., you get zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving your in-laws, gosh, what's fair?

Two out of five buttholes, 2.5 maybe? Am I the butthole for telling my girlfriend she's going to have to get over dirt if she wants kids? I'm a 25-year-old woman, and my girlfriend, Amy, who's 27, is a wonderful person. She's very smart. She works

in a clean room with computer chips and stuff. But she's also something of a germaphobe, to the point that she keeps her toothbrush in the hallway outside the bathroom in a Ziploced bag. Her apartment is always spotless. She showers two to three times a day. Even her car somehow never has any dirt on the floor. She hand washes all of her clothes as soon as she's done wearing them. It's both impressive and intimidating. I'm not the messiest person on the planet by any means. I don't have massive piles of unwashed dishes or a leaning tower of used pizza boxes or anything, but I'm not as clean as she is. I'm not against making some adjustments, but we've

been talking more about the future now that we're getting serious, and I've come across a problem. Amy wants kids, desperately wants kids. I'd like kids too, but she's never been around babies or little kids before in her life, and she seems to think that she'll be able to keep the house just as clean as it is now, and keep the baby spotless too. I'm the oldest of four and the oldest cousin of nine. I grew up around kids. I've been babysitting since I was 10. There's no such thing as a clean toddler, not for longer than 10 minutes at the very most. She thinks that if we just work at it, we'll have a spotless house and a spotless kid. I told her gently that that's just not possible and asked how she plans on handling diapers, vomit, frog smuggled into the house, jammed,

going everywhere, soup bowls tipped over for fun, spilled grape juice, nail polish on the walls, and the like. She insisted that the kids who do that are just poorly trained and don't have good boundaries. I told her that they're kids without fine motor control or impulse regulation, and accidents will always happen. And even if she wants to have kids, she's going to have to accept that they're going to get messy, and our house will get messy. Amy accused me of not being supportive and trying to find excuses not to have kids with her and trying to guilt her into being sloppier. This is dissolving into an actual fight instead of a discussion and I'm starting to second guess myself. Maybe my family was just excessively messy because we were rural and poor.

Maybe my standards are too low and we really haven't tried hard enough. It's very frustrating and I want some outside perspective, parental perspective especially. About a month ago, I was visiting a school that my daughter is going to attend this upcoming year and they had baby chicks and I asked the teacher if I could hold the chick and the teacher warned me you know be careful or might poop in your hand and I looked at her and I said you know in front of all the other parents who were there too I have a four year old we all already have poop on our hands so I think that should give you a pretty good estimate of what it's like to have a one two three four year old it's a world of bodily fluids. Let me just put it that way. O.P., your girlfriend is dumb. She just doesn't understand

reality. I don't know. She thinks she's going to have a tidy two-year-old. Is she nuts? O.P., I'm on your side. You get zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving your girlfriend two out of five buttholes because yelling at someone and starting a fight with them because they're like, hey, just so you know kids are messy, is just stupid. It sounds like your girlfriend needs therapy. Am I the butthole for letting my daughter flaunt her expensive items? I'm a 50-year-old woman and my husband is 48. We have a daughter, Danica, who's 21, who's been extremely independent her whole life. Danica began working when she was 15, and now she works part-time for a large corporation while pursuing her studies. We're extremely proud of her and how hard she's worked. We generally

allow her to manage her own finances, and she insists on contributing monthly to family expenses with the money she earns. Danica occasionally likes to make pricier purchases, which I don't have any concern over, as I think they're sensible financial choices. Like last year, she decided to purchase the newest MacBook as her old laptop was on its last leg, and she wanted something reliable and long-lasting, or when she bought a Mark Jacobs bag for work and university. We recently went on a family trip with my brother and his family, who have two kids of their own, Tammy who's 20 and Nick who's 23. His kids and Danica aren't exactly close, but they get along fine for the most part. I know that Tammy and Nick don't have any source of income besides my brother, and they haven't worked a day in

their life. During the trip, Danica would occasionally pay for the three of them for small things like drinks or food. When we were shopping, Danica bought a few items for herself and picked up gifts she wanted to bring back to her friends. During dinner that night, my sister-in-law, my brother's wife, told my husband and me that were spoiling Danica too much with her purchases. We explained that Danica earned her own money, and every cent came from her job. My sister-in-law then proceeded to point at Danica and tell her that if that was the case, she shouldn't be flaunting her purchases and items in front of her cousins, who don't have a cushy little office job, and parents who spoiled her into the person she is.

Danica apologized politely, saying that she didn't mean to flaunt her things, but I could tell that she was upset and embarrassed. My husband stood up and shot back, saying that Danica shouldn't have to apologize for her own hard work. I also pointed out that Danica has been financially independent since she was 15, and we've always done our best not to spoil her. My sister-in-law then told us that we weren't teaching her how to manage her finances correctly, and that all this money had turned her into a little brat. Danica excused herself to the bathroom and texted that she had gone back to the hotel. We had a tense back and forth for the rest of dinner, and we came back to finding Danica crying in her hotel room. I call my brother, hoping that he's able to talk to his wife,

but he explained that for the past few days, Tammy's been crying to her parents about not having what Danica had. She's been whining to her mom that she wanted the newest MacBook as well, but she refused to get it for her. Myself, Danica, and my husband have been getting calls from the rest of the family, some calling us A-holes, and some who are willing to hear us out and understand where we were coming from. So am I the butthole? It's super ironic that the sister-in-law calls Danica the spoiled brat when it's her own daughter who's saying,

Mommy, buy me a MacBook, Mommy, buy me a Mark Jacobs bag. I can sort of understand that behavior out of like a 14-year-old girl, but Tammy's 20. Old enough to get a job. Girl, if you want a MacBook, go get a job. make money, and buy a MacBook. It's not complicated. Also, I can tell O.P. is very proud of Danica, but I honestly don't think Danica is particularly ahead of the curve here. No offense. I would expect 21-year-olds to have a job and be purchasing their own things. So Danica's not exceptional.

She's normal. It's Tammy. It's the sister-in-law's kids that are behind the curve. Am I the butthole for not changing my daughter's wedding venue, even though my sister's husband proposed to his 22-year-old mistress there last month. I'm a 51-year-old woman, and I put down a $20,000 non-refundable deposit on this gorgeous beachfront estate for my daughter, Amy, who's 26, this September. We booked it 18 months out. For context, and without revealing too much, it is the venue in our area, and it's been Amy's dream wedding spot in all of her Pinterest boards. Last month, my sister Carol, who's 53, found out that her cheating ex-husband, Mark, who's 55, proposed to his coworker, who's 28, though she was 22 when they started having

an affair. The woman posted engagement photos from the same venue, specifically the beautiful beach area where Amy plans to have her ceremony. Carol is obviously destroyed. She called me sobbing, begging me to change venues. She says she can't watch Amy get married where Mark proposed to a girl younger than his own daughter. Can't smile for photos on that beach. I feel sick for her. I do, but one, this is a $20,000 non-refundable deposit. Two, save the dates have already been sent.

Three, Amy's dreamed of this venue since high school. Four, everything else is now booked for three times the price. I told Carol that I can't lose $20,000 and crush Amy's dreams because Mark is trash. Carol says that I'm choosing money over her mental health, that I'm forcing her to relive the worst betrayal of her life for pretty pictures. I also told my daughter about it, and she doesn't want a venue change. That it's not her fault that Mark, who's been out of all of our lives for the past five years, ruined that place for Carol. Carol called Amy a spoiled brat who wouldn't understand real pain. Now Carol's skipping Thanksgiving.

My and Carol's side of the family say that I'm heartless. The place is cursed anyway. Why should we host Amy's big day there? My husband's side of the family says that Carol doesn't get to hijack Amy's wedding because her husband is a cheater. Am I the butthole for not switching venues? So I think everyone can pretty much agree that OP has every right to shut down the sister. But if I'm being extremely generous to the sister,

at minimum, she should offer to pay the 20K. non-refundable deposit so that O.P. doesn't have to eat the cost, right? You can't just demand that someone give up 20K and not offer to replace it and then be surprised when they shoot you down. Of course they're going to shoot you down. It's $20,000. Also, O.P. says that this guy's been out of their lives for five years, which presumably means that Carol has had five years to process the betrayal and move on. Yeah, it sucks to get cheated on. I do sympathize with Carol, but her reaction is stupid. you get zero out of five buttholes. Am I the butthole for taking my daughter out for a nice dinner and leaving everyone else to fend for themselves? Me and my daughter, who's 16, love eating at

authentic Asian restaurants. We had to pick my 12-year-old son up at a Korean barbecue about 40 minutes from our house. It was a party with another family. I suggested to my husband of 25 years that he and the two other kids can have whatever they wanted for dinner and my daughter and I would get Korean barbecue at this restaurant. He said, no, we should all go as a family. I reminded him that he and the other kids aren't big fans of Korean barbecue, and it'd be cheaper to eat separately. He insisted on everyone going. When we get to the restaurant and he sees the menu, he complains he doesn't know what to order and complains about the price. The other kids followed suit.

I suggested they'd go eat in another restaurant in the plaza, and my daughter and I would get Korean food. It smelled so amazing, by the way. We waited 20 minutes for a table, and he continued to me. make comments about the price. Even told me, you better not order anything fancy. That was the last straw. I got up and went to the van. Everyone followed. I said that I was taking everyone home, and my daughter and I would go on our own to a local Korean barbecue. We did exactly that. Everyone else had McDonald's and played Roblox. I get home and my husband is fuming saying that I owe everyone an apology. I refused. I said that I had zero remorse. It seems,

seemed like everyone was happy but him and went to bid. I slept perfectly fine. He's still mad. So, am I the butthole for taking my daughter out for dinner and leaving everyone else to do their own thing? O.B., you should take your daughter out on a solo mother-daughter date. That's how bonding happens, just like how your husband should also take his daughter out on a father-daughter, you know, eating date. It's normal, healthy behavior to have one-on-one time with a kid.

And yo, what's wrong with Korean barbecue food? Korean barbecue is delicious. A lot of the dishes are literally just meat plus fire. Unless he's a vegetarian, who's got an issue with meat plus fire? That was our slash am I the butthole. And if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.