rSlash - r/AITA My Nightmare Daughter is Ruining My Life

Episode Date: June 19, 2023

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on the same points vet app. The platform that gives you everything you need. You know what to do bet on it. Point Spets Sportsbook and Casino. Welcome to R-Slash. Am I the bad guy where OP absolutely hates his daughter? Am I the bad guy for counting down the days until my daughter turns 18 so I can stop being legally responsible for her?

I married my wife about two years ago, and she has a daughter from a previous relationship. Early on in our relationship, my wife made it clear that her daughter has a father, and she's not looking for another father for her. My wife set the ground rules that I would be an adult figure, but not a parental one. I'll have no say in how she's brought up and I can't punish her in any way. Considering she was 14 when her mom and I met and 15 when we married, I agreed to her rules. My thinking was that she's already too old for me to make any difference in her life, so why make that an issue? Fast forward a couple of years, and my life has been a nightmare. This girl constantly gets into trouble

and has been kicked out of several schools. She lived with her father during this time. She had to move in with us so that she could attend a new high school in order to graduate. She's been suspended several times at this high school, but it looks like she'll graduate on time. While living with us,

she's gotten into two car accidents, once when she was drunk, and we had to remorgge our house to pay her attorney fees and legal bills. The judge dressed us down in court for not being better parents. I'm not a legal expert, but I do think the judges can put you in jail for arguing, so I bit my tongue and took it. It was humiliating. The girl is a couple of months away from being an adult,

and this weekend I was out with the guys and she came up in conversation. I complained about how much money I've spent bailing her out of trouble and that I can't wait until she turns 18 so that she can face her own consequences. Word got back to my wife and she blew up at me. I still don't think that I said anything wrong, but I'm staying at a motel tonight. I want to be clear that we're not kicking her out, and considering that she doesn't

work, she'll be living with us for a while. I'm just waiting for the day that she's an adult, so I won't be yelled at by any more judges. Opie, so your wife tells you that you have no control over your daughter, but then expects you to be financially accountable for that daughter. So basically, you're not allowed to stop your daughter from making messes, but you are responsible for cleaning up those messes. I don't blame you, OP.

I'd also be marking the days off a calendar. Big fan of this comment from Jan's guy. Dude, why are you so worried about being jailed? Trust me, you're already in a prison of your own making. Not the bad guy. Opie, I'm giving you zero out of five bad guys. I'm giving these two ladies in your life, 3.5 out of five bad guys. Am I the bad guy for checking our nanny cam footage to prove that I was being lied to?

This is gonna sound ridiculous, but just stick it out. Recently, my spouse and five-year-old daughter were having dinner together. My husband took some food off of our daughter's plate to try a bite, and she responded by shaking her finger and saying, you need to ask! He said, I'm sorry, you're right, I should ask. And then, a few minutes later, reached over to my play setting and took some food without asking. I didn't think that this was a great example for our daughter, considering it happened moments earlier, so I said, you didn't ask. You just did the same thing to our daughter.

He said, I assumed you were done eating, and I said, you assumed, but just ask me. So he handed the food back to me and said, can I have some of your garlic bread, and I shared. It was a very calm, normal exchange because this was a non-issue and I wasn't upset about the situation. We tried to bring it up in marriage counseling as an example of how to communicate in certain situations. Mainly, when I say that something hurt me

and my spouse wants to explain how he experienced the event instead of just apologizing, it became an issue when he only wanted to give his side of the food story and counseling. Later that day, I calmly asked him again if he would like to share his side of the story to see if it changed my perspective. I said, I can't argue with your experience since we both agreed on what happened. And to my surprise, he indicated that he didn't agree with what happened. And to my surprise, he indicated that he didn't agree with what happened. He told me that he took the garlic bread from my plate because I got it for both of us.

I knew that this was nonsense because I order from this restaurant frequently and I know how much garlic bread comes with the dish. I got insanely angry because we argue constantly about how things happen so I stormed off. Later, he came to me and said, I'm sorry, I thought the garlic bread was mine and I was wrong. So by this point, he had been telling me that he got garlic bread for both of us, and then that he thought the garlic bread was his. I felt crazy, like I usually do when I have these conversations with him, so I thought to check that nanny cam to see what really happened. It turns out he handed me my food and said, and there's Gorlick bread on top for you.

And later when I called him out for taking it from my plate, he didn't say, isn't that bread mine? Or, I got this bread to share, he said, okay, can I have some of your Gorlick bread? I took these clips from our nanny cam and sent them to him, asking why would he lie about something so small and turn it into a massive thing? He immediately got mad at me and said, I can't believe you would do something as ridiculous as checking the camera. You are so out of line and he stormed off.

So Reddit, am I the bad guy or out of line for using our nanny cam to call my spouse out for lying? You're not the bad guy here, but this story has absolutely nothing to do with garlic bread. This story has to do with the fact that he is constantly gaslighting you and manipulating you so constantly that you're doubting your own brain, your own version of events, so you have to rely on a camera to see, wait, am I wrong? Am I crazy here? That's the damage of gaslighting. Is once someone gaslight you so consistently, you start to just, am I memory wrong? It's really insidious. And the fact that you have these reoccurring fights and you have to bring it up and counseling means that this is an

ongoing reoccurring constant problem. Opie, to put it simply, your husband is mentally abusing you. Gaslighting is mental abuse, and this is classic gaslighting behavior. It's kind of hard to give him a butthole score here because if we just take this as like the surface level of he gaslighted you about a piece of garlic bread, that's not that bad, that's like 0.5 out of five bad guys. However, it's

difficult to evaluate just how deep and pervasive this gaslighting is. My hunch is that he deserves somewhere around like 3 out of 5 bad guys, but I want to be clear that's just a guess. So I think I'll just say this guy gets a butthole score of 0.5 minimum, but more than likely it's a lot higher than that. Opie, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 bad guys. I think it's time for you to start evaluating if you really want to be married to someone who mentally abuses you.

Am I the bad guy for refusing to pay for my boyfriend's food after he ruined my food photos? I have an Instagram account dedicated to photos and short videos of food from local restaurants in my city. I don't turn meals into a whole photo shoot production when I go out, but I do like to snap a few photos of everything as it comes out. I've got about a thousand followers, it's just a hobby for me, but I've made friends with some other bloggers and we like to go out and get pictures together and try new restaurants.

I prefer doing this with my foodie girlfriends because my boyfriend hates it and he will go out of his way to take a big bite of food or mess up his plate with his fork before I snap my pictures. And he rolls his eyes when I take pictures of my own food so I pretty much stop bothering when we went out together. Money's been tight lately because of some medical bills, so I haven't been able to go out to eat with my foodie girlfriends, and the infrequent date with my boyfriend is the only chance I get to eat out. I had

to sit him down and have a look, just let me enjoy things conversation with him, and I told him I was going to take pictures of my own food when we went out and could he please just not be immature about it. And since we alternate who pays for dates, I told him I would appreciate it if he could spare the 30 seconds for me to snap a picture of the appetizer and his meal on nights that I was paying. And I got a sort of half-hearted, do whatever you want, confirmation. Sunday was my turn to pay, and he let me take a picture of the appetizer with minimal fussing. But then, when the entrees came out, I went to snap a picture of his food and he messed

it up with his fork. Then he reached over and stirred up my pasta and also ruined the photo of my own meal. I was so pissed off by that that I refused to pay his half at the end of the meal, which pissed him off because he said that he wouldn't have ordered a cocktail if he knew that I was going to skip my turn. He says that I owe him because I don't get to just decide not to pay according to our agreement after we already ordered. OP, my wife also likes to take pictures of her food, and I also get annoyed and frustrated by it. But do I turn it into a big deal? Do I fight about it?

Do I mess up her meal to ruin her photos? No, I just let her do her thing because she enjoys doing it. I could kinda understand where he was coming from if he ordered the food himself, paid for the food himself, and he messed up his own plate because, you know, it's his meal, so he gets to enjoy it or take photos or not take photos as he so pleases. But since he agreed to it beforehand, and you're paying, and he messed up your meal, that's just, he's just mean. Why are you dating someone so mean, OP? I hate to say that you should break up with this guy over something as minor as food pictures,

but really, this guy's just a jerk. OP, you get zero out of five bad guys. I'm giving him 1.5 out of five bad guys. These side marios all you can eat is all you can maja soup, salad, and garlic homo. bad guys. Craving a delicious and comforting holiday meal but don't feel like cooking? Swiss Chalets got you covered with their iconic festive special. Enjoy their famous quarter chicken dinner! Now with cranberry sauce, stuffing, linda chocolates, plus a scratch and win card

where everyone's a winner. Download the Swiss Chalet app to place an order for delivery today. Visit Swisschalet.ca for contest details while supplies last. Am I the bad guy for showing text to my roommate that his girlfriend sent me? I rent a room in a house with my boyfriend and his best friend, Eric.

We're all in our 30s and have lived in the same home since college. Eric's had a girlfriend, Amanda, for the past 6 months who stays over. Technically, she doesn't live with us. We're all Star Wars fans, so last night, we decided to binge watch some episodes and get pizza. Amanda wanted to use her Disney Plus account, but mine was already logged into the TV in the living room. We got our pizza, snacks, wine, and beer. I left my phone in the bedroom because I like to unplug after work.

After moving night, I checked my phone before bed, and there are pages of text messages about how Amanda wants me to stop doing things for her man, including start using her Disney Plus account on RTV. She says that I'm not allowed to cook or grab him things. The list goes on to where she accuses me of flirting with her man. This thing is a ridiculous wall of text and I'm showing this to my boyfriend before we go to sleep. He said, Eric needs to see this, so I screenshot page after page that Amanda sent while he watched the new trilogy. I can hear Eric and Amanda arguing, and Amanda slams the door to leave around 3 a.m. I told my co-workers about it today, and a few people thought that I was being petty

about it because Amanda has insecurities that she needs to work through. Apparently I bullied her about them by sharing her text with her boyfriend. Alright, I just ran to the comments on this one because I knew people were going to be fired up. And I want to read this reply from Tootsie0 who says, not the bad guy. The only thing crazier than Amanda is your co-workers' ridiculous take on the matter. I mean, I could understand if you and Eric were cuddling under the same blanket, okay, that's a reasonable insecurity.

I could sort of understand if you were drinking out of the same wine glass. Again, that's a reasonable thing to be insecure about. If he's massaging your shoulders or your massaging his shoulders during a movie, like these are normal things to get fired up about. But that he's using your Disney Plus account? It doesn't even make sense because by that logic, by that logic, if Eric watching your Disney Plus account is you flirting with him, then doesn't that mean that your boyfriend watching Amanda's Disney Plus account

is her flirting with your boyfriend? If you're thinking to yourself, yeah, you're right. That doesn't make any sense. That's because it doesn't make any sense. Is her flirting with your boyfriend? If you're thinking to yourself, yeah, you're right. That doesn't make any sense. That's because it doesn't make any sense. Like literally who in this scenario could log into their Disney Plus account and not flirt with anyone else? Did she want you to wheel in for separate TVs

with four separate Disney Plus accounts? Yo, this girl is a red flag. Huge red flag. If she gets this triggered over Disney Plus, then this relationship is destined for failure. Opie, I'm giving you zero out of five bad guys. I'm giving Amanda 0.5 out of five bad guys, but I'm also giving her like three out of five crazies.

Am I the bad guy for refusing to listen to my mother-in-law's speech on my wedding? So I hate speeches. I never understood the appeal. I think they're boring, exhausting, and very, very forced. But having said that, this is just my opinion, and I never force it on anyone. I've sat through long, excruciating speeches without complaining like any other decent human being.

When it was my turn to get married, however, I requested no speeches. We wrote that we loved everyone and that we knew they loved us, so if you want to say something, say it to us directly, in private. My husband thought that it was funny, but he knows my feelings about speeches. We had a small wedding with only loved ones that was one weekend long. My husband loves games, so the wedding planner did a really great taskmaster type of game that everyone appreciated. Dinner came, and my mother-in-law stood up and started by saying, I know that we're forbidden to make speeches by the bride, but this is my only son getting married, so I'll do what I want to do. I didn't hear the rest of her speech because I was seeing red. My sisters and bridesmaids were shocked.

I pretended like she wasn't talking and continued my conversations with my girls. They did the same. My mother-in-law was furious. Both my sister-in-law's were furious and my husband was very angry, so he refused to look at me. The rest of the night was awkward. My husband's side of the family soaked in their seats. I wanted to make sure that it wasn't ruined for the rest of us, and we ended up having a blast. I spent the next day with my family and friends.

My husband said that it was very wrong to do what I did. He said that I couldn't force my mother and law to shut up, and he knew that she wouldn't no matter how much we told her to. He said that I shouldn't have disrespected and humiliated her like this. Her marriage started off on the wrong foot it seems. Am I the bad guy? I don't get it. Why is it okay for your mother-in-law to disrespect you and humiliate you at your wedding, but you can't do the same to her?

Huh? Unfortunately, OP, your wedding is a terrible day to find out that your husband is going to always pick his mom's side over your side. OP, I'm giving you zero out of five bad guys. You were very clear about your boundaries and they chose to disrespect them. I'm giving your mother-in-law two out of five bad guys for disrespecting you on your wedding day and your husband two point five out of five bad guys for not having your back on your wedding day, and your husband 2.5 out of 5 bad guys for not having your back on your wedding day. That was our Slash of Myda, and if you liked this content, be sure to follow my podcast

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