rSlash - r/AITA My Teenage Son Poos in His Pants

Episode Date: February 27, 2023

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on the same points vet app. The platform that gives you everything you need. You know what to do. Bet on it. Point Spets Sportsbook and Casino. Welcome to R-Slasher M-I-The-B-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-H- absolutely filled to the brim with do-do. Am I the bad guy for moving to a hotel because my wife's family insisted I sleep on the couch? My wife and I got married last summer. Her family lives across the country from us, so until this point, I had never actually visited them, but I had met them a handful of times, and we've always gotten along fine. They invited us to come visit and stay with them for a few days, and we them up on the offer. We flew in yesterday and everything went well. Her dad and I watched

football while she caught up with her mom and sisters and then we had a really nice dinner. But things went south at the end of the night when it was made clear that they did not want me sharing a bid with my wife while in their home and that they expected me to sleep on the couch. I honestly thought that they were joking at first, but they insisted we sleep separately. I had a problem with the implication that I shouldn't be allowed to sleep next to my wife,

and I also have a bad back, and the couch didn't look the least bit comfortable. Unfortunately, they don't have a guest room. After arguing back and forth for a bit, I decided to leave and book a hotel. I told my wife she didn't have to come with me. She chose to stay, and I said that I'd come back the next day. I went off to a marry out about 10 minutes away and got a good night's sleep, trying not to let the whole situation bother me. This morning, I called my wife asking when I should come by. She told me her parents want me to apologize for leaving the way that I did.

I told her that I'm willing to apologize to keep the peace, but they need to acknowledge that it was not appropriate to insist that I can't share a bid with my own wife. She said that she'd talk to them and call me back. About 10 minutes later, I hear back from her, and she tells me that not only will they not apologize for it, they're now insisting I need to come back and stay on the couch for the rest of our visit and if I don't agree with this, I'm not welcome back in the house. I'm pretty livid at this point, so I told her there's absolutely no chance that I'll do that and I'm no longer willing to offer any sort of apology.

My wife's sisters are now bothering me saying that this is just the way their parents are, that my wife is very upset, and that I need to just give in and stay on the couch for the rest of the trip before this turns into some kind of family feud. From my perspective, I don't care what they think, and I'm willing to treat the rest of this trip as a solo vacation go sightseeing and meet my wife back at the airport at the end of the week. So am I the bad guy? This post started a little odd like I was like, huh, why do they care so much about this? And I was, you know, theorizing why they might care. The obvious one was like they're really religious and conservative and they don't like the idea

of hanky, panky under their roof. But then I thought, you know what, I wonder if this is about control. Is this about them just flexing their muscles and saying, or how's our rule? If you don't like it, hit the highway buddy. But I dismissed that thought because OP said that the other interactions with the parents had been like amicable. But then we get to the point where they have an ultimatum about how you have to sleep on the sofa and it's like,

okay, okay, I get it. This is about control. So I'm on your side OP, like yeah, this is their house, so it is their rules, but their rules are dumb. And if you don't wanna follow their rules, you can leave and that's what you did. Honestly, I think the way you handled the situation is pretty respectful.

If they just didn't want you to passionately hug your wife overnight, then they should have been perfectly fine with you going to the hotel, right? Because that guarantees there's no passionate hugging. But I think this was less about making you not sleep with the wife and more about forcing you to sleep on the sofa just because they could. And then OP posted an update.

I took the advice of one of the posters here to ask my wife and her sisters to meet me at a dinner apart from their parents. It was interesting to say the least. After we sat down, I leaned into them a bit about what happened. I asked my wife if she knew her dad was going to demand we sleep separately, and she said that she was surprised by it as well. She'd expect that if I were still just her boyfriend, but we're married now. I then asked them all if they thought it was okay for their parents to act the way they did.

They said it wasn't, but they know their father, and it's best to just let things like this go. This led to a somewhat uncomfortable conversation about how controlling he can get, ah, I knew it! How he angered easily when he doesn't get his way, and that he was already throwing a fit over me disrespecting him by leaving. The reason they were all trying to get me to come back and apologize was because he would find some way to make them all miserable for the rest of the week if I didn't. I told my wife that I was really disappointed that she wouldn't side with her husband when I was

clearly in the right, and she sort of went quiet. I then asked if they thought this was even about the house rules at all, because it seemed more like their dad was just trying to show me who was in charge. They agreed. Up to this point, I had really done everything I could to not escalate the situation, but I started to get really mad that they were all so afraid of how their dad would react. I decided I needed to push back a bit. I know my wife was mainly here to spend time with her sisters, who she rarely gets to see. So I told them all that I was going to move to a hotel by the beach about an hour away in San Diego for the rest of the week, and I would book a second room for them if they wanted to join. They don't get to go on trips much, so I figured they'd

be excited to get a free vacation away from their parents. They know their dad is probably going to freak out when they leave, but I think they realize this situation had gone too far, and they decided they would come and deal with the fallout afterwards. So that's where all this stands for now. I'm about to check out of my hotel and hit the road for San Diego. My wife and her sisters are coming down in a separate car after their parents leave for work.

I fully expect their dad to throw a conibption fit when he finds out they left without telling him, but I don't really care at this point. I tried to be the bigger person at every turn, but he pushed this way too far. I feel so vindicated, I knew it, I knew it. Also OP, you scolded your wife for not having your back during this conflict, and you said she got quiet, and like I agree with you she should have had your back I say many many times on this channel that you should support your partner. However, however I will say that in this specific instance I feel like we

should give your wife a little bit of slack because clearly she's been growing up in a controlling abusive household and she's scared to fight back against her father. I think most people would be scared to fight back against her father in that situation. So yes, she did the incorrect thing by not having your back, but I hope that you give her some leniency and that you forgive her OP because I sense that she's just starting

to spread her wings and like resist her father's control starting with honestly an incredible reaction to this story. I think you handled the situation perfectly OP. The idea to get a hotel on the beach is masterfully done. So I hope you, your wife and your sisters in law all have a really good time on the beach. Just you know, cut your wife some slack. She grew up in an abusive household so we can't be too mad at her here.

OP I'm giving you 0 out of five bad guys. I'm giving the dad, I guess three out of five bad guys, maybe 2.5. I'm giving your wife a gentle zero point five out of five bad guys. Am I the bad guy for taking my kids to my parents' house to sleep because my husband will not enforce the rules when his parents visit? We live three blocks away from my parents.

And they see our kids almost every day. My husband's parents live a couple of states away, and only see the kids a few times a year. It's easy when we go see them because we only visit when the kids are off school. When they come to see us, it's at random intervals throughout the year. It's not a problem really, they're excellent grandparents, with one small exception. They think that our rules go out the window when they visit. They think it's mean that we don't make their kids favorite food every day. Why can't the kids watch TV with them

before they do their chores and homework? Why do the kids have to be in bed so early? It drives me crazy that I'm the bad guy because my husband won't put his foot down, so I have to do it. They came last week. On Monday, as soon as dinner was over, they wanted the kids to pay attention to them. They wanted to take the kids to see Avatar on a school night.

My husband allowed it. That was the last straw. I told him that he knew that throwing the kids off their schedule screwed me over, so I gave him the choice of either enforcing our rules or I would. He said that he would take care of it. The second night there was a hockey game on. He wanted to watch it with our son, who loves hockey. I reminded my husband that our son has chores to do and homework. He said it was just a hockey game. I told the kids to get their stuff. I took them a change of clothes and their homework to my parents house. My mom and

dad will watch them and then take them to school in the morning. I went back home and the three of them were waiting for me. They said that I'm being a controlling and abusive person by denying them time with the kids. They said that I'm not the only person allowed to make decisions regarding the kids. They said they came all this way to see them, and I'm being a jerk by keeping them on schedule. Fine. They're visiting for a couple of weeks. Wednesday after I picked up the kids from school, I dropped them off at home with my

in-laws. Then, I went out for the first time in ages. I told my husband that I would be out late and I didn't want to wake anyone so I'd be at my parent's house. I did the same thing Thursday and Thursday night. My husband's been calling and texting and coming over to tell me that I need to come home because the house is a disaster because his parents won't do anything. They're here on vacation, and they're there to see the kids, not clean up. The kids are having a fun time with no rules, and he's been contacted by the school

because no homework was turned in on Thursday or Friday. I didn't answer his texts. I said that I would be back after his parents left, or after he enforced the rules. He said that I was taking it too far and that this was affecting his work. Honestly, tough luck. You are super, super not the bad guy here, OP. The fact that three adults can't get these kids to do homework, go to sleep on time, they can't clean the house, they can't do chores, they can't do any of this stuff because they're not actually adults apparently. Like why does that have to fall on your shoulders?

I'm guessing that OP is a stay at home mom and that's why they talk so much about how this is on OP shoulders because they see it as her job. The thing is, they're sabotaging her work. Like the audacity of this guy to say, this is affecting my work. Meanwhile, they're actively sabotaging O.P.'s work. Yeah O.P. you get 0 out of 5 bad guys. I'm giving your husband 2.5 out of 5 bad guys and your in-laws 2 out of 5 bad guys. Am I the bad guy for forcing my son to use a bidet and threatening to talk to his friends or take him to the doctor about his underwear? For some reason, my 14 year old son can't wipe properly.

This was never a concern to me because his mom did the laundry. Unfortunately, she's sick right now, so I've taken over the household chores that she used to handle. My son is still responsible for his chores, and I do my chores as well as hers. The first day I did laundry, I gagged and almost pukeed from his underwear. If he were three and not fully potty trained, I might understand how they ended up like this. But he's a healthy young man, he should not be leaving his butt this unwhiped. I talked to him about it, and he said that he would make an effort to do a better job.

Nope, no change in the situation, so I went to the hardware store and installed a one-bede in the bathroom he uses. We already have one in ours. I told him that he has a choice of either using the bede or washing his own underwear. He doesn't know how to use the washing machine and he refuses to do them by hand. He started going commando, which just meant that now the problem is in his jeans. Oh my god! So I said that we might need to take him to the doctor to see what was wrong with him, to see if it's physical or psychological. I also said that the next time his friends were over, I was going to ask them if they left

their underwear in the same condition. Now to be clear, I would never actually embarrass him like that. He said that I was being a bad guy and he called his mom to tell her what I was doing. She said that he was just like that and I could deal with it until she was better. I don't think that's a great plan. If this kid never learns to wipe his butt, he'll never have a partner who doesn't have a poop fetish. I'm not kink shaming him, this is his thing. It could never learn to wipe his butt, he'll never have a partner who doesn't have a poop fetish. I'm not kink shaming him, this is his thing.

He started using the bidet, but he says it's gross and weird. I said it was grosser and weirder for a 14 year old boy to mess his pants every day. We're both stressed out about his mom, but this situation is not because of her. I asked her, what did I just read? How does this guy see a clean butthole as being gross and weird but dropping hot loads in his pants? Isn't? What? O.P., your son straight up needs a diaper. If anything, you're being too understanding. Like you said, I'm not kinkshaming him if that's his thing. Okay, but if that is his thing, he doesn't need to be walking around with a fresh load in his drawers, because at that point he's imposing his fetish on everyone else around

him. I mean, that's probably not what's going on here. He probably just, he probably just has run of the mill bad hygiene if I had to guess, but still, this guy needs, he needs intervention OP and clearly you're the man for the job because your wife for some reason isn't interested in it. Maybe she likes cleaning it? Maybe she's the one with the weird poop fetish?

I don't know OP but I am 100% on your side here. I'm giving you 0 out of 5 bad guys. You have got to do something to fix this situation. I'm giving your wife, gosh. I guess I'll say two out of five bad guys for enabling deeply disturbing and inappropriate behavior from her son. And I'm giving your son two point five out of five bad guys because he's definitely old enough to learn better.

But at the same time, I guess his mom is enabling him, so he's only but so much responsible. I don't know. Just please fix it, Opie, please, I'm begging you. enabling him, so he's only but so much responsible, I don't know. Just please fix it, OP, please, I'm begging you. That was our slash in my D.A., and if you liked this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.