rSlash - r/AITA My Wife Wants to Exploit Our Kids on YouTube

Episode Date: September 21, 2023

0:00 Intro 0:09 No niece 3:33 Kicked out 7:50 Don't care 11:55 The bill 13:46 End of life Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Tis the season for making memories with family and friends, so celebrate with Swiss Shalai's festive special, their famous quarter chicken dinner, now with cranberry sauce, stuffing, linda chocolates, plus a scratch and win card, or everyone's a winner. It's a tradition truly worth sharing. The festive special, only at Swiss Shalai, visit SwissShalai.ca for contest details, while supplies last. Welcome to R-slash Am I the Butthole? Where a homophobic girl learns that going around calling gay people the Epsilon has consequences. Am I the Butthole for letting my brother and family stay with me after flooding, but not my niece? I'm a 37 year old man, and I've been married to my husband who's 41 for 4 years.

I came out to my family as by when I was 16, and from the very beginning, they were nothing but supportive. And to this day, almost my entire family accepts me as who I am. My niece, who's 20, is the only exception. She's my brother's daughter, and despite her parents showing no prejudice against the LGBTQ community, she doesn't make a secret of her homophobia. I don't know where her belief stem from, but from the day that I first introduced my husband to her family, she's been very hostile towards us.

She was only 14 at the time. She refuses to speak to my husband. Barely acknowledges us at family gatherings, and despite her father constantly chastising her, frequently uses the F's to refer to members of the LGBTQ community and calls same-sex relationships disgusting. Due to severe flooding, my brother and his family have been forced to evacuate their house. My husband and I have a guest room and a sofa bed in our living room. So, when my brother asked me whether his family could stay at our place for a while, I told him that him, his wife, and their younger kids were very welcome to stay as long as they needed to. But,

that we weren't comfortable letting his oldest daughter stay with us. He seemed to have been expecting that answer and told me that he understood my reasons. When he broke the news to his daughter, she was furious, asking where else she was going to stay and that she had nowhere else to go. From what I know, my brother offered to help repay for a cheap hotel, but she doesn't want to dip into her savings because she doesn't work, and she's been living with my brother rent-free. Apparently, she's been staying with a friend for a few days now, and she's been telling her mother how awful it is there. My brother is still supporting my decision, but his wife has started trying to convince me to let her eldest daughter move into.

She's been pushing me to get over her comments because my niece is still young and naive, and that she couldn't have known her actions would have major consequences. She's advised me to be the bigger person and not let my hard feelings for her daughter stop me from helping a family member because that would be a buttold thing to do. I don't get it. Why does she even want to live with you? If she hates gay people, why would she want to live with gay people? This isn't you, you know, getting retaliation, getting revenge, this is just giving this homophobic girl exactly what she wants. She doesn't like gay people? Fine, go pay for a motel then. I mean, what do

people expect you to do to invite someone into your home who's gonna disrespect you, your husband, and your marriage? Are you nuts? Yeah, I get the 20-year-olds aren't the most wise-and-experience people on planet Earth, but 20 is definitely old enough to understand the consequences of your actions. The mom says that she's young and naive. Okay, well, maybe this is exactly the lesson that she needs to learn, that actions have consequences. In fact, if OP buckled and invited her into his home, wouldn't this encourage her to be young and naive because she doesn't face consequences? Maybe the mother is the reason why the daughter is so homophobic, because she just lets her kid get away with whatever she wants. OP, you could zero out of five buttholes. Stand strong

and do not buckle. Am I the butthole for kicking out only my sister-in-law which meant that she had to fly home early from her vacation? I'm a 29-year-old woman and I have a half-brother, James who's 37. James is married to Lindsay who's 35 and they have two kids, a four-year-old girl and a two-year-old boy. I invited James, Lindsay, and the kids to visit me this past week and they were meant to stay until next Friday. Lindsay and I have always gotten on fine, except for the fact that she's always had a weird attitude to me being a stay-at-home mom. She always asked me if I'm going to ask my husband before making non-essential purchases,

or ask me if I feel bad relaxing while he's working, or suggest I do things for him as a thank you to him since I'm apparently not doing anything else. I know that James and Lindsay are big on splitting costs, and while James pays for everything for both the kids, he won't pay for Lindsay, despite making almost 25 times her salary. Yo, what? Hold on, 25 times her salary? Hold on.

If she's making, I don't know, 50k times 25. That's 1.25 million dollars? Hold on, okay. Let's suppose she's not making, let's just say, I don't know, 20k. Let's just say she's making 20k times 25. That's 500k. So dude is loaded. Being that that's the relationship they're happy with, I just roll with the comments because my marriage must look weird to Lindsay. However, there is a line. A few days ago, we were sitting on our rooftop drinking wine after the kids went to bed. Lindsay was admiring the view and made a comment about how much our apartment costs.

James must have told her, and she asked if my name was on the deed. She then said, Half of an ex amount pinhouse just for lying on your back, sex work is way more lucrative than I thought. Both my husband and James laid into her for that comment. I was obviously furious and told Lindsey first thing in the morning that she had to get out. She was not staying here after speaking to me like that, especially when she wasn't even

apologetic. I felt bad for ruining James and the kid's trip, but both my husband and I were too angry to have Lindsay stay there. The next morning, Lindsay asked if she could stay. She said that James wasn't willing to end the trip early and wanted to stay, but she couldn't afford to stay in a local hotel. She blamed her comment on the wine, but her apology slash explanations seemed so insincere. And she was clearly only apologizing because she had no other choice. I told her this, and I said that even if she did mean it, I just needed some space from her and didn't want her around after what she said. Because when put on top of what she's been saying for

years, it's obvious that's what she thinks. James then said that he wasn't paying for her hotel because it was her own actions that got her kicked out. And she would have to fly home early and he'd fly back with the kids' plan, which is what happened. Lindsay has since laid into me over texts and social media for forcing her to go home early without her kids. Both my mother and James have said that I was wrong for kicking Lindsay out. James's mother said that I should have just let her stay for James's sake and not invited them back. My mother says that I should have kicked everyone out.

I don't think that I'm the butthole for kicking out only the person who made the comment and not kicking out the person who defended me and the innocent kids. Did I handle it like a butthole? Okay, Opie, let's be super clear. If you kick out only one person, that's completely fine. What everyone else does is up to them.

You know, if James doesn't want to fly home with his wife, that's up to him. They can't put that decision on you and be like, how dare you make me choose between flying home early and flying home later with my kids. What do you mean how dare I make you choose? This is literally your wife, so if you wanna go home with her, go home with her. If you wanna stay with your kids and fly home later, then do that.

I mean, that's up to you. So their argument is just stupid OP. Also, I would have definitely kicked Lindsay out after that comment. What she said to you is super sexist. OP, you get zero out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving Lindsay 2 out of 5 buttholes. I'm also giving James 0.5 out of 5 buttholes

because even though he did defend you, which was the right thing to do, it's not right for him to then turn around and blame you for kicking her out, which is what you should have done. Am I the butthole for telling my wife that I don't care about her dreams? My wife wants to be an influencer on TikTok and YouTube. She's been creating mommy content

and content about her day to day life. When she told me this is something she wanted to do, I didn't have her problem with it, and I only said that I don't want our children, a four-year-old boy and a two-year-old girl in any of her content. I didn't monitor her channel because it didn't really seem necessary. I recently watched her channel because I thought that it would be cute to see what she does in her day-to-day life. I found our kids' faces in almost all of her content. I told her straight up that she needs to remove all of her content.

She said she knew that I wouldn't agree, but she doesn't think this is a big deal. I do not like children-based content. I feel like a lot of the time when you see that kids make profit, they become less of your kids, and more of a product. Your interactions with them become more performative, and I can see the same thing has happened with my wife, because she posted a video of her getting our 2-year-old out of a tantrum and how she deals with it. But how is your first instinct to record and hold a camera while your baby is crying?

She started crying, saying that she built this up and this is her dream, and deleting her content will ruin it, and I said that I simply don't give an f. If you don't delete it, I'll consider divorce. I know a lot of people have children on social media, and I don't mind an Instagram or Facebook post, but to make videos seems too intimate to share. She told her friends, and even hinted on her social media accounts that she has an over-controlling and narcissistic husband who doesn't want her on social media. I'm currently being ridiculed by her friends.

Am I being over-controlling or narcissistic? Oh my god, a post that I'm actually qualified to give my opinion on. Finally, a post where I don't just have to talk out of my butt on the commentary. Okay, OP, this is super, super simple. Putting your kids in social media is a two yeses one no scenario. If either parent doesn't want to have their kid on social media, then the kid doesn't get to be on social media. It's really that simple. Also from an ethical standpoint, if you're going to make content with your kids and use

your kids as the content, then I firmly believe that your kids deserve a cut of that content. They deserve at least half, probably even more than that. So I don't know if your wife is making money off of this, but if she's making money and just pocketing all that money and using it for whatever she wants instead of setting it aside in a trust fund or an account specifically for the kit, which I'm guessing she's not doing since OP doesn't know about it, then that is extremely unethical in my opinion. Also, the fact that she did this when you specifically told her not to is a pretty bad red flag. And then when you confront her about this, the way that a calm rational

adult should, just by talking to her, she responds by lying about you on social media and making you be the bad guy. Is she doing this on the YouTube and the TikTok account where she's growing this big following? Or is she just doing this on her personal Facebook to her friends? Both are pretty bad, obviously. But if you've got a family vlog, and you're complaining to your 100,000 subscribers about how bad and toxic and narcissistic your husband is, that's a whole other level of red flag territory. I do honestly believe that we've interdivorced territory here O.P. Your wife is a liar, a manipulator, and she clearly doesn't respect you as a husband

or a father. So, I'm giving you 0 out of five buttholes and I'm giving your wife four out of five buttholes. And keep in mind this is someone whose job is social media. I've been doing this for like six years. I'm super, super biased in favor of influencers and making a living on social media. But even for me, your wife has gone way too far here. If I were in your shoes, I'd be shopping for a divorce attorney. Also, OP, I don't know if you know this, but you can actually just take down the videos. Even if you don't have access to your wife's credentials, if she's posting footage of your kids

without your consent, you can 100% contact TikTok, contact YouTube, say, these are my kids, here's the proof, I don't give consent, flag the videos, get them taken down, that is 100% within your power. Because if she's not gonna cooperate, this means war. Your business has grown fast, from opening your first location to planning an expansion in no time. And with your business platinum card from American Express, you can access spending power and payment

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Gold tenders no, but chicken tenders yes, because those are groceries, and we deliver those too. Along with your favorite restaurant food, alcohol, and other everyday essentials. Order Uber Eats now. For alcohol, you must be legal drinking age. Please enjoy responsibly. Product availability varies by region. See out for details. Am I the butthole for only paying for my wife and I at a restaurant?

I'm a 24 year old man and my wife is 24. We're a newlywed couple. My wife has four friends who she's been really close with since high school. For a celebration, my wife decided to go to an expensive stayhouse. The day comes and we drive there in separate cars. We all eat, and my wife slides me the bill, which is over $700 and proceeds to say, the man should always pay for his wife and her friends. I laugh awkwardly saying, why? She says because I'm the man.

I tell her that the only person I would pay for would be you and me. Her friends proceeded to laugh at me, calling me a broke husband. I stood up, put down two $100 bills for me and my wife's food, and left. My wife gets home and starts screaming at me, saying that I made her feel embarrassed. How she promised her friends that I'd pay, and that her friends made fun of her on the right home for marrying a man who can't pay the bill. I decided to pack a bag and head to my friend's house. I talked to my parents and my friends,

and they said that I should have just paid for it. Now I'm having second thoughts if I overreacted. Am I the butthole? Hmm. I have to wonder how many times OP's wipe has been bought a $150 meal from one of her friends, boyfriend slash husbands. You think the answer is zero? No, it couldn't be zero, because that would make her a hypocrite, wouldn't it? And surely she's not a hypocrite. Trying to saddle you with a $700 bill is nuts! Also OP does add in an edit that he realizes he should have put down more than $200 because

he forgot the tip, but he was emotional, he wasn't thinking clearly, but he acknowledges he made a mistake. So with that in mind, I'm giving OP 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving everyone else in this story 1 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole? I have stage 4 cancer, and I said no shit to what I thought was my in-laws weird and insensitive comments. I have stage 4 cancer and I have young kids and a wife. I'm probably gonna die within one or two years, so my fuse is short and with certain people. My in-laws says to me,

It must be so hard for your family and what your family is going through. I want you to know that it's not your fault. They've said something similar to me before and I just said, I know and moved on. This time I couldn't take it and said, no shit! It's pretty obvious I didn't deserve cancer, and I know that it's not my fault for getting it. She became upset and told a few people that I was rude to her. Should I apologize?

Am I misunderstanding what point she was trying to make? The only way I can think of taking this is that there could be a thought in people's minds that it is my fault for getting cancer and making things so hard for my young family. I'm young and live to healthy lives, so I don't get it. Am I being overly sensitive? Was she just looking for a goodwill hunting moment? I honestly don't get her point. So I think one of the really important lessons to understand about trying to comfort people is it's not enough to comfort someone. You have to comfort them the way that works for that person. Otherwise, you're not really comforting them. You're just comforting yourself to make you feel like

you're a good person by doing the right thing. If she's trying to make you feel better, but accidentally insult you, then in my opinion, it's on her to fix that. I don't think she was really being malicious. She just seems to not really understand who you are and what you're like. So since she's your in-law, she should really take the time to understand you and give you the comfort that you think that you need. So I understand your frustration OP, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. I think also I'm giving her 0 out of 5 buttholes because she's well intentioned, she's just going about this the wrong way. That was our slash of my the butthole, and if you like this content be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new reddit podcast episodes every single day.

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