rSlash - r/AITA Oops! I Accidentally Slept with My Friend's Fiancé

Episode Date: August 24, 2024

0:00 Intro 0:08 Unfortunate accident 3:36 Crazy boy 5:26 Comment 7:02 Admit it 10:52 F yourself 14:10 Cheating Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mom, Dad, I humbly suggest you save some money and shop Amazon for back to school. It's for my growth, meaning my body's growing at an alarming rate. And clothes you buy me this year will be very small very soon. Plus, the clothes I love today will be out of style tomorrow. But at least your wallet doesn't have to be my fashion victim if you shop low prices for school at Amazon. Hopefully this is helpful. Amazon. Spend less, smile more.

Welcome to r slash am i the butthole where OP discovers that he has accidentally been sleeping with his friend's fiance. Am I the butthole for telling my friend that I've accidentally been sleeping with her fiance? Oh boy, this is a hell of a title, I'm aware. I don't really know how to start this, so I'll just get into it. I'll preface this by saying that I'm a 22 year old guy and very, very gay. I was in high school when I met this friend,

and she was the cool older kid the year above me. Her name is Sienna and she's 23. Now, after high school, I went to an out-of-state college while Sienna went to the local university. We kinda lost touch other than the obligatory Happy Birthday and Merry Christmas texts. So, you can imagine my surprise when I got a text from my mom a few months ago saying that a wedding invitation from Sienna had gotten delivered to my parents' house. Sure enough, a quick text to the lucky lady confirmed she's getting married! Her long time partner, Marcus, a 25 year old guy, had finally

proposed. A summer wedding right in my hometown, right when I, and some of our other friends, would be back in town from university. I was invited to one of the pre-wedding girls nights, because my life is basically a two-dimensional comic relief gay side character I guess. And we got wasted. Like the kind of drunk where logic isn't even in the same dimension. So when the topic of other people in the hashtag girl squads relationship came up, like the genius I was, I whipped out my phone to show them the hot guy I've been hooking up with as just a dumb summer fling. Who turned out to be Marcus. Kill me now to save me from this mortification. Rightfully so, Sienna lost her mind. Fair, no criticism from me. But

then she turned on me and started blaming me for ruining her wedding. For clarification, because I'm sure this will come up in the comments, no, the wedding invitation did not have any photos on it. It was one of those minimalist designs with over-the-top calligraphy. That's it. Her social media only features her. I had no way of knowing what Marcus looks like. I don't personally think that I was at fault here,

but here is where I think that I messed up. I very loudly and to the entire club drunkenly said, It's not my fault your cheating fiance likes getting his back blown out, Sienna. I feel absolutely awful. I don't want to be the other woman, technically guy, but you get it. And I certainly don't want to be the other woman, technically guy, but you get it. And I certainly don't want to hurt a friend like that. I've tried apologizing a thousand times, but she's not interested in talking to me, which I totally get. When Siena confronted Marcus, he confessed

to not only hooking up with me, but also eight different guys over the course of their four-year relationship. The wedding's been called off. Okay, let's just say that Marcus gets three out of five buttholes. That one's pretty easy. But as for you and Sienna, I think you both get zero out of five buttholes because first of all, you two were both absolutely wasted. So you can't really expect two people who are completely sloshed to be delicate and political and careful with their words. So Sienna lashed out at you because she was hurt and then you lashed out at her because you were defending yourself. So I'm

giving you both zero out of five buttholes. However, it looks like your friendship is pretty much dead. Honestly, OP, once things settle down, Sienna will hopefully come to realize that you did her a huge favor because it's better to find this out before the wedding than after. Am I the butthole regarding my ex-girlfriend and her 17-year-old adult son? I'm a 38-year-old guy and my ex-girlfriend is 39. I met this woman on Hinge. She's amazing on her own. Educated, hilarious, sexy, and great in bed.

She has a 17-year-old son and she's been divorced for 5 years. The baby daddy is local but not really involved in the dad role. We started dating and it's going great. Then, without warning, she starts bringing her son along on the dates without asking or an FYI. And this kid is a real school shooter type. He has no friends, only two gamer friends online, and he's never met them in real life. He stopped going to school and only has online classes. This kid is a real piece of garbage and has a massive attitude and gets his way 100% of the time. She just hovers over him and grants his every wish. So this happens infrequently for a couple of months, maybe like

1-2 dates a week max, and then they become more frequent. This kid is always along for the date. I spoke up and was ignored. So I slowly start backing away. I eventually stand my ground and break up with her on the obvious ground that she has no boundaries with her son. I informed her that her son was real close to needing a genuine butt kicking. Either it was going to be me or he was going to piss someone off in the real world. She says that I'm a piece of garbage and I have no idea what I'm talking about. Am I the butthole? And to be clear, the son was terrible to his mother too, openly and without issue. OP, you dated this girl for several months you say? Man, she must have really been good in this act because I would have been out of there a long time ago.

Down in the comments we had this story from True in Tone. My friend is the same with her son. We're all convinced that he'll kill her one day or go on a shooting spree. We don't live in the US, but he's had 24-7 unsupervised online time since really young. He's been raided by the police for the violent incel content he consumes. What? When they got to his PC, they found that he had watched the live-streamed massacre in New Zealand hundreds of times. He's a real worry and never has a single friend.

So our friend does what your ex did. She brings him to everything without letting us know until the last minute, then makes elaborate excuses as to why he had to come. $200 tickets to a musical for my birthday, we've planned dinner, the show, followed by girls night drunken shenanigans at my house afterwards. And two seconds before leaving home, she tells our friend group that she'll have a plus one. He doesn't have a ticket, he can just wait at my house or in the car during the show.

Then cramp our ability to talk freely for the rest of the night. Then the whole thing becomes about him! If he's in another room, she yells at him, haranguing him constantly, asking if he's okay or if he wants anything. He can't so much as pour himself a glass of water or make his own sandwich. He's 18. If he's in the room, she's constantly telling him how handsome he is, which is just uncomfortable for everyone, including her son.

Or she makes every conversation about his non-achievements. In every other aspect of her life, she's rational, intelligent, and a great friend. But her son is the deal-breaker. Am I the butthole for telling my mom that she and her husband need to admit that they screwed up and find a way to move on? I'm an 18-year-old guy, and my parents divorced when I was 6. My younger sister was 4 at the time and my younger brother was 3. My parents have shared 50-50 custody of us ever since, though now I don't have a custody thing set up because I'm adult now and I'm no longer part of any of that. I stay with my dad now.

My mom remarried when I was 11 and my siblings were 9 and 8. Her husband was divorced and had two kids who were 8 and 6. My stepdad had primary custody of them, but in the summer they'd get longer time with their mom. My mom and her husband moved in together a month before their wedding. From that point on, they created these really strict, really weird, and really crazy rules that basically made sure we were never a blended family and there was always animosity. These are the rules.

If you want permission for something, ask your new parent, not your regular one. No biological siblings only were allowed to play with each other. Everyone had to mix. No closed bedroom doors? What? They wanted to be able to see that we're mixing. Every day, you'll tell the people in the family one thing you love about them. You must give everyone hugs before leaving the house. Never use the term step or half in the house. There were other rules, but those were the most damaging ones. My mom told me that she wanted us to be a happy, blended family and she didn't want favoritism of parents or siblings.

She told me that I didn't just have a brother and sister anymore. I had two of each. I also had a second dad. They enforced these rules, or tried to. The hugging rule never took off, and I never ever told her husband or his kids stuff that I loved about them. I never loved them to begin with. The rules led to fighting, to us pretty much causing chaos if they took us places.

We were all grounded pretty much all the time when we were at their house. We also started doing stuff to make sure that family vacations couldn't happen together. Whenever we had a planned vacation coming up, my step-siblings would just spend that time at their mom's place. My mom and her husband would get so frustrated and they would try giving us these talks. My mom would come to me and say that I'm the oldest and I had to set an example. But now that I no longer go to my mom's house, I don't want to make a big deal out of it.

My mom called me yesterday and told me that I needed to help create the family unit they fought so hard for before it's too late. She mentioned me being the oldest again and how I should be there for a week when we can all be family. I told her, no, I there for a week when we can all be family. I told her, no, I don't want to. We're not a family. I told her they screwed up. They need to admit it and they need to find a way forward because none of the kids they

set so many rules for want to be a family. Mom started crying on the phone asking why I wanted to ruin her marriage and rejecting the family they were trying to be. She asked, how could I say they failed when we wouldn't even try? Am I the butthole? So I'm in an interracial marriage and it's important to me and my wife that our daughter learns to love both American food and Chinese food. And the way to do that is to present delicious food from both types. But if we tied her to a chair and forced her to eat Chinese food and said,

before you leave the house, you must eat a dumpling. And every single day you have to write something about how much you love rice. Then yeah, she would eventually learn to hate Chinese food. This is just really bizarre behavior out of your parents. Instead of actually creating a loving family environment, they just forced like the image of a happy family and hoped that was enough. Super dumb, super weird. I'm on your side OP.

You get zero out of five buttholes, I'm giving your parents… gosh what's fair here. I think three out of five buttholes. Am I the butthole for telling my sister-in-law to go eff herself at her baby's sip and see? My wife's sister, Jen, who's 33, and her husband Matt, who's 35, welcomed their first child about four months ago. Jen didn't want a baby shower, but decided on doing a sip and see for close relatives to meet the baby. This happened last Saturday. My wife has met the baby before this, but it was my first time seeing them since the birth.

About two months ago, my dad passed away unexpectedly in his sleep. It's been a really difficult time for me, but I'm in therapy and on antidepressants, both of which are helping. I wasn't really looking forward to attending this sip and see, but it meant a lot to my wife that I come with her and she kinda pressured me to come since I hadn't seen the baby yet. The event was just close family, about 15 of us in total, and very informal. About an hour into the event, Jen asked me if I wanted to hold the baby. I told her I didn't really want to, but she pretty much shoved the baby into my arms.

She then sat next to me and told me that she was sorry about my dad and that she regretted not being able to attend the funeral because of the baby. I thanked her and told her not to worry about the funeral. I understand. She then went on this weird tangent about new life springing from death and renewal of energy. I had no idea what she was talking about and just kinda nodded along. Then she said that she hopes seeing and holding a beautiful baby

will help me get over my loss. It was a weird comment and I looked at her and told her, no, this is not helping me get over the death of my dad. She got defensive and told me that it was supposed to be a joyous day to celebrate a new life and that I should be happy and not dwell on my dad's death. I didn't want to cause a scene in front of everyone, but I was pissed. I handed Jen her baby back, leaned in close to her and whispered, Go fuck yourself, Jen. I then got up and walked over to my wife and told her that I needed to leave. I told her she can stay if she wants, but I had to get out of there ASAP.

She asked me why and I told her I would talk to her about it on the drive home or later if she wants to stick around. By that time, Jen had gotten up and was on a warpath. She came up to me still holding the baby and poked her finger at me telling me that I have no right to talk to her like that. That got everyone's attention and now everyone was looking at us. Matt came over to ask what was going on, my wife was confused, Jin was basically yelling, the baby was starting to cry. It was a mess! I told my wife I need to leave and she needs to make a decision right then.

She ended up coming home with me. I explained what happened on the drive home and she said she understood why I was upset by Jin's comments and agreed that she was out of line, but I shouldn't have said that to her. My wife has been getting a lot of grief from Jen and her parents, basically calling me the biggest butthole they've ever met. I don't even know if an apology will help. I'm a little bit surprised by the number of people who are saying, not the butthole down below, because while I definitely will agree that Jane did step over the line here, hey, keep in mind, this is Jane's house,

Jane's party, she has a baby in her hands. Cussing her out isn't really appropriate either. She does deserve some kind of criticism, but I think OP escalated too far, personally. I'm giving OP 0.5 out of 5 buttholes and I'm giving Jane 1 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for lying to my wife that I'd forgive her cheating? When me and my wife first I'd forgive her cheating? When me and my wife first started dating, we had a talk about cheating. I straight up lied and said, if you ever cheat, I need to know straight away, and if you tell me, and it only happens once, I think I could forgive you. Fast forward five years and we're married.

A couple of nights ago, she came up to me and asked if I remembered our talk. I said which one, because we had a lot of talks like that. She then reminded me of the cheating talk and confessed that she slept with a coworker at a recent company party. I was mortified! I packed my stuff and left, and she begged me to stay! But I couldn't, I needed to cool down. We talked yesterday, and she again reminded us of our talk early on.

I laughed and said that I never intended to forgive her and I only said that at the time to make sure she confessed if it ever happened. I'm still planning on divorcing her. Nothing can change my mind about that. But my wife said that what I did was manipulation. Was I the butthole for lying about forgiving her? Ugh, classic cheater behavior. They cheat and then they try to make it your fault. It sounds like your wife viewed that conversation as effectively a get out of jail free card. However, OP clearly didn't mean it as a free hall pass. He specifically said, I think I could forgive you, which means even if it did happen, he

would be hurt by it. And she chose to do that anyways. OP, you get 0 out of 5 buttholes and your lying, manipulating wife gets 3 out of 5 buttholes. That was r slash amythebutthole and if you liked this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new reddit podcast episodes every single day.