rSlash - r/AmITheA--Hole for Standing Up to My Bully Father?

Episode Date: November 19, 2022

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Welcome to R-slash, am I the butthole where OP gets a liar fired? Am I the butthole for getting someone fired because they pretended to know the language? I'm a 27 year old woman and I decided to apply for my dream job. I met all the criteria and one of them was to be proficient in my native language, which is Russian. And I am since I've grown up in the country speaking and writing it, and I finished school and university, where obviously all the subjects are taught in Russian, except for English and French and German language classes. I ended up securing the interview with this place,

and I needed to demonstrate my knowledge of Russian. So the person who was giving the interview started asking me questions in Russian. However, I could barely understand her. Not only did her accent make it incredibly difficult, but the fact that she couldn't build a sentence, but also used incorrect forms of the words and the punctuation was totally wrong too. In short, it sounded like she had been randomly putting the words into Google Translate and was trying to repeat them over. I answered all

of her questions. However, I also noticed that she barely made any notes. I decided to let it pass and wait for a verdict. After about three months of chasing in silence, I got an email saying that I wasn't successful, and the reason was that they believe my knowledge of the Russian language was poor and insufficient for the job, and not up to their standards according to the interviewer. Of course, I was confused since the lady who interviewed me could barely speak the language herself.

So I decided to leave feedback about the experience on one of the job sites which was made to share info about working at the job in the interview process. My review received a fair amount of traction and last week on Monday I ended up getting a call from the higher ups who listened to my feedback and opened the investigation. On Friday, I found out the lady who interviewed me was dismissed. She and her friends were messaging me on social media, calling me a butthole because this job was her only source of income and she was struggling. I'm now feeling guilty about this, and I feel like I was a butthole

for writing about my experience. Am I the butthole? Okay, okay. So it's okay for this woman to steal your job, but it's not okay for you to steal her job? Not man. Okay, so obviously what happened here is that this woman lied during the interview,

told people that she knew Russian and somehow she managed to fake her way through. And since she's the only person at this company who pretends to speak Russian and no one else can speak Russian, her plan, I'm pretty sure, is to bomb every single interview where they have another Russian person comment and saw it the process so that she can keep billing a paycheck for as long as possible. Because inevitably, that plan is going to fail, right? She'll eventually meet someone else in the company who speaks Russian, or the company

can't keep delaying hiring a Russian speaker long enough, so they have to hire someone at which point her. Her house of cards collapses, so she was just stalling, and her stalling stopped at you. And besides, it sounds like all you did was write a review on Glassdoor, which hardly makes you the butthole. It sound like you knew that was gonna result in her getting fired, and even if you did know, so what? Opie, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 bliots. I'm giving your interviewer 1 out of 5 bliots. Am I the butthole for making a big deal about my birthday, and saying that I don't want it to be made all about my sister, I'm a 15 year old guy, and I'm turning 16 and less than a month,

and my parents had talked about throwing me a party with my friends and family that are celebrating, and I let myself get excited about it, which I'm starting to feel was dumb on my part. See, I have a little sister Ava and she's seven. She was a baby that my parents tried to have for a few years after I was born, but struggled, and then she was born premature and almost died. It meant that my parents had to put a lot of time into her when she was little. It meant that a lot of the time our world revolved around her. Back then, I would hear people say that when she was a little older, things would return to normal, but they never really did. My parents prioritized Ava over me. I know that she's a lot younger and it makes sense at times.

Some examples. Two years ago for Christmas, I really wanted to play station 5. I made a deal with my parents that if I saved up X amount of money, they would pay for the rest of it as a gift. A shipment arrived close by us and I had the money. Mom told me that Ava needed a haircut and they wanted to pamper her a little because she'd been to the developmental pediatrician which she hates. So the money that would have gotten the PS5 went to her and I never got the PS5.

Instead I got some clothes and food for Christmas. And the food I had to share with my sister, they weren't even my favorites. My high school didn't award ceremony and made us celebrate students who helped make the school better. I was given an award for helping others in school and acting as a mentor of sorts. Ava's school play was on the same day, and both of my parents chose to go to the school play instead of the award ceremony. They didn't even remember to ask me about it when I got home.

My birthdays have always been boring but something Ava will enjoy too. We do Chuckie cheese where I can bring her friend or they hire a bounce house for family to come over. But always a smaller one which means I don't get to enjoy it. The spotlight always goes to her at least once. She's blown out my birthday candle since she was two. This year I really thought that it would be different. All the plans were sounding really fun too.

Then my parents found out that Ava was being bullied in school and was having a rough time. They told me that she wasn't looking forward to anything, including my party, and that they thought it would be nice to do something she could enjoy and give her some of the spotlight on the day, where we could assure her that she's loved and wanted. I told them it was my birthday, and I thought they wanted me to enjoy it. They told me they do, but Ava needs this, and that as her big brother, I should be thinking about how to make her feel special. I told them I deserved to feel that way too. Then I told them that if they were going to do

this to me again, I was done. I told them not everything needs to be about Ava, that she might be their whole world, she might be their whole focus in life, but she's not mine. My parents got so mad at me. Am I the butthole? Oh my god, OP, your parents are repulsive. Where's the line that I just read? Where is that? You wrote, they told me Ava needs this and that as her big brother,

I should be thinking about how to make her feel special. Okay, let's take that exact same sentence that your parents just told you and change it around a little bit. But OP needs this and as her parents, you should be thinking about ways to make him feel special. OP, this is uh this is literally emotional abuse. They're neglecting you emotionally and they're treating their other kid as a golden child. Which is like messed up on so many levels because it teaches

you to resent your parents. It teaches you to resent your sister. It teaches your sister to become a spoiled brat who is going to become an awful person when she grows up. So literally, what your parents are doing is destroying your family by creating toxic relationships. Opie, I've read tons and tons of stories about this, and I would be shocked I tell you if they ever changed their minds about this. So if I were you, I would start making preparations to move out at 18 and never look back because stories like this usually don't end well. Like I hate to break it to you OP, but your parents made their choice. They chose your sister,

not you. You're 15 and she's seven so they've had seven years to change their behavior and they never have. So more than likely they never will. Opie, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. I'm giving your parents 4.5 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for telling my stepdad that I'll eat whatever I want in this house because I'm paying for it in front of my step sisters? I'm a 20 year old guy currently living with my mom full time since my dad is working out of the country. She has a husband who has two daughters from her previous marriage, ages 12 and 14, and my half sibling who's six. My mom's husband is unemployed because he was abruptly terminated, and both of them do gigs here and there while he looks for a job, but they barely bring

any money into the house. I'm in my second year of university, and between working and getting money from my dad every month, I've been paying for most of my stuff, clothes, hobbies, phone bill, etc. ever since I was 16, and when I turned 18, I began to pay rent and form my car. My mom's husband and his daughter are big eaters. On a mind, I just started to buy my own groceries and they knew they weren't allowed to have any. Though, I let my stepsisters take some of my snacks because I get that they're kids. But ever since like three or four months ago, my mom has been asking me to buy this, buy

that, buy this again. And I've been buying their groceries too, so I'm basically paying for all the food plus rent plus driving my stepsister to and from school, among other things. Yesterday we were having dinner together and I remember that I bought a watermelon a few days ago. My step-sister said that she wanted some too, and I said there was barely anything left, and she could have an apple or something, but she said that she wanted the watermelon, and I said, sorry, my mom's husband said that kids eat first, but I said that kids have

been eating watermelon for the past few days, and now it's my turn. He looked me dead in the eye and said, put it back son, you can eat something else. So I just said that I'll be eating whatever I want because I was paying for it. Nobody said anything after that, so I took the watermelon to my room to eat. Later my mom came and apologized for him, but said that I shouldn't have said anything in front of my sisters and it was rude because I was financially abusing my family. So I don't know.

Hold up, hold up, hold up. You financially abusing them? Uh-uh, nope, that's not exactly what's going on here. They're financially abusing you. You're paying for everything. They're gilting you into paying for everything. And then after you buy everything, they're gilting you for enjoying the things that you bought.

O.P., I think it's time to move out. If you can pay your own rent and groceries and hobbies, then you're perfectly self-sufficient, so you should move out of the house. It'll be better for you because you won't have to deal with your parents' hypocrisy or your siblings stealing your food. And it should also be better for your parents too because once you're gone, no one will be financially abusing them anymore and they can pay their own rent. OP, you get zero out of five buttholes. Your parents both get two out of five buttholes. Also, your mom coming into apologize on her husband's behalf as such a cop out move.

If he wants to apologize to you, then he can do it face to face. He's perfectly okay looking you did in the eye and bossing you around was something that you bought, but apparently he's not man enough to look you in the eye and apologize. Am I the butthole for telling my sister that she could have dated the guy she liked?

Had she not been such a Massageanistic pick me. I'm a 20 year old girl and my sister Kim and I are identical twins We were very different growing up and still are I hate to say this but Kim is the definition of a pick me girl Always viewing massage andistic nonsense about how women are weak and should abide by men How she's short and petite so she can't do anything on her own with that a big strong man around. How all the girls are trying to hard-by-wearing makeup while she's pretty naturally so they all hate her for it. You get the gist. Kim and I attend the same college, but we study in different departments. In one of my classes, there's this guy named Dave.

Dave is your typical handsome frat boy that most girls in our college have a crush on, including Kim. Over the summer, I started working in a small coffee shop near campus to earn some extra cash. During that time, Dave became a frequent customer there and was pretty friendly towards me since he recognized me from class. After a while, he admitted that he's attracted to me and asked me out so we can get to know each other. Knowing that Kim liked him, I decided to reject Dave and instead offered to set him up with her. Where identical twins, so if he asked me out based on attraction, then it really shouldn't matter. Dave agreed and I gave him my sister's number. Okay, I just got to stop right here and say, doesn't this sound like the plot to a rom com?

Guy has a crush on a twin, twin knows the other twin has a crush on him, so she tries to hook the sister up with him and then hygiene since soon. I knew that they met up for a date during the weekend, but I didn't have time to ask him how it went since I was sick. Today, during my shift, Dave approached me and asked if I could return to Kim the lip gloss that she left in his car since he knew the brand was expensive. I asked him why he didn't return it to her himself, and he said that he didn't want a seer after how the date went.

I was confused, so I asked him if the date was really that bad. He explained that they went to a nice restaurant where my sister didn't stop harassing and criticizing the waitress for wearing too much makeup and looking easy. After that fiasco was over, she proceeded to say some stuff that I can only imagine are usually said in an Andrew Tate podcast. Dave, who was apparently raised by a single mother and has five sisters, was horrified. So he excused himself to the bathroom, paid for their meal, Vinmoad came some cash for an Uber, and left her at the restaurant alone.

I was embarrassed for Kim, but totally understood why Dave walked out on her, so I apologize on her behalf and took the lip gloss with me. I returned it two or two hours ago, and she didn't stop complaining about how awful Dave was. How he wasn't a real man since real men usually like it when she brings up how women are inferior to them. At some point, I just cut her off and told her that she had a chance of a nice date with a guy that she liked, but she ruined it all because she couldn't stop being a misogynistic pick me even for one second. I'm now back at my apartment and Kim hasn't stopped texting me demanding I apologize, but I don't feel like it. Am I the butthole?

Uh, I mean, not really. If anything you're kind of coming from a place of like love and concern because she's the one who bombed the date by constantly criticizing the waitress, which is super unsexy. And then by saying a bunch of other stuff that obviously turned off Dave. So like pointing out that your behavior is the problem, isn't really mean, it's just tough love. Besides, if she really believes that women are inferior and need to be put in their place, then why is she being so upset that she's being put in her place?

I guess it would be okay if she heard her from a guy, but not from a girl. But no, because she was criticizing the waitress, so clearly that means she thinks it's okay for women to criticize other women for not doing things correctly. So, when that means it's okay for OP to criticize her for not doing things correctly? Yeah, this just doesn't make sense. Your sister's just a good old fashioned hypocrite. OP, you get 0 out of 5 buttholes. Dave gets 0 out of 5 buttholes. Your sister gets 2.5 out of 5 buttholes.

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