rSlash - r/AmITheA--Hole I Told My Daughter I Hate Her

Episode Date: December 19, 2022

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Welcome to R-slash, and my the Butthole, where OP stepdaughter tries to sleep with him. Am I the Butthole for telling my wife's little sister that I never liked her? I'm 30, my wife is 34, and her sister, Ali, is 19. We got married two years ago, but we've known each other for a long time. My wife's parents live abroad, and they have a business there. About 11 years ago, they sent Ali to the US to live with my wife and get her education. My wife is basically her only parent. She does everything for Ali. I'll be honest, Ali's a brat who gets on my nerves. It's like she exists just to make my wife's

life miserable. She's arrogant, rude, entitled, and nasty. She constantly broke rules, and none of her teachers ever liked her. She refused therapy. I'm amazed at the patience and kindness that my wife has because this girl is a nightmare. The second that Ali went to college, we got married. She came home for Thanksgiving, probably skipping classes, and came to me this weekend and confessed her feelings. Apparently, I treated her so much better than my wife did when she was growing up. I tried to be nice to her just because she's my wife's sister.

I would do things like take Allie out once in a while just to give my wife a break. When my wife would try to tutor Allie and Allie wouldn't even do her work and fail half her classes, I told my wife to just let it go. So I lost it and told her that I don't like her and I never liked her, that I was only being nice to her because it would make my wife happy. I told her that I only put up with her spoiled self so I could be with my wife and I was annoyed whenever she intruded. Ali started sobbing and ran out.

I told my wife everything and she said that I was right to turn her down, but I didn't have to be so harsh. She thanked me for being honest. Her parents are furious. I've gotten a bunch of weird text messages from what I suspect are Ali's friends. So am I the butthole? Wait, hold on, hold on. I- wait, what? Wait, what? Am I really this dumb? Am I really this dumb? I am actually this dumb. Wow, I totally misread this story! She came home for Thanksgiving, probably skipping classes, and came to me this weekend and confessed her feelings. Apparently, I treated her so much better than my wife when she was growing up.

When- okay. When I read that line about how she confessed her feelings, what I thought that OP meant was like, she came to him and was like, OP, I really respect you because you were a great father figure growing up and I just want you to know that I care about you. Apparently, everyone else in the comments is interpreting that as, OP, you are nice to me growing up so I want to be in a relationship with you. That can't be right. That can't be right.

Hold on. People have to be wrong here. There's no way this is right. Did OP reply? My wife said a weak spot. be right. That can't be right. Hold on. People have to be wrong here. There's no way this is right. Did OP reply? My wife's always had a weak spot. Hold on, info. Did she confess her feelings romantically or just state that you were a kinder parental figure than your wife? Romantically! OP says. She said it was clear that I liked her more and she wanted to let me know how she felt. She wanted to know if I felt the same way that she does, which is an absolute no. Not only do I hate this, but it pales in comparison to the fact that I knew her since she was a kid.

Woah. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, this story just got so much worse. She's 19, so 11 years ago, that means OP has been raising her since she was 8? Yo, this story got so much worse! Am I dumb or just innocent and naive? That I honestly thought that it didn't even cross my mind that she thought of OP romantically, because he's basically been her dad for the past decade. And she's like, what are you doing, stepdad?

Oh no, stepdad, come help. I've gotten caught in the dishwasher somehow. Please help me out of this incredibly compromising position while I'm wearing nothing but panties. Oh, stepdad, whatever will I do. Man. Man, I'm glad I read the comments. Can you imagine how much I would have been ripped to shreds

and gotten like, I don't know, exposed by other YouTubers? If I had given my commentary based on how I thought the story was going? You know, honestly, I think that what she did wasn't too bad. She's a little spoiled, a little entitled, but honestly, coming to your stepdad after 10 years and confessing your feelings, it's kind of sweet, actually.

I don't understand why everyone's so upset about it. So I'll give her one out of five butthole, she's a little spoiled, but I think that what she did is kinda sweet. You guys would have been ripping me to pieces if I said that. Our slash, you think it's okay for someone who's been raised for 10 years to come to their stepdad

and try and get to a relationship with them and break up their marriage? Man, I dodged a bullet. I'm sorry, I just got completely shocked. I was flabbergasted by this story. So onto what actually happened, her being raised by her stepdad for 10 years and then trying to break up her older sister's relationship so she can be with her stepdad of 10 years. Yeah, that's pretty messed up. That's pretty messed up. On top of being a spoiled entitled brat.

I think I'll give her, don't go for five out of five buttholes because not only is she a home wrecker, she's the home wrecker of her older sister and she also tormented her older sister for 10 years and she's a spoiled POS. Man, also her parents are furious. I'm gonna guess she didn't tell her parents the whole story.

That has to be the case, right? Mommy, daddy, my older sister won zero out of five buttholes. I'm very grateful that you recognize the red flag here that would have emerged out of entering a relationship with your stepdaughter. Thank you, OP, for being a normal sane person. I really appreciate it. Everyone in the comments appreciates this.

If you had actually started that relationship when you're twice her age and your stepfather, My God! This story is ridiculous! Am I the butthole for letting my mother have a copy of the key to our new home? Despite my wife's objection, I'm a 35-year-old man and I recently bought a one-story house. It's important to note that this house was solely purchased by me. My wife did not help save up for it, and it's in my name.

When my parents threw us a party for this happy occasion, my mom asked for a copy of the key in case of an emergency. I let her have it, which made my wife upset. She didn't say anything at the time, but she waited till we were alone and started arguing with me, saying that I shouldn't have let my mother have a copy of the key. I asked why since my mother is known to respect privacy and is a very trusted member of the family. My wife said that she doesn't feel comfortable with the idea of someone else who's not a resident to have a copy of the key. She also brought up how my mother didn't pay a penny towards the house, so this should just qualify her from getting the key. I said it wasn't a big deal, but she kept persisting,

saying that I had to take the key back. Quite frankly, this had me fuming. I pointed out that I'm the one who bought the house, so it's my decision to decide who gets to have a copy of the key, end of story. She screamed at me, saying that technically, she did contribute towards the house savings, back when she used to pay for the rent

and daily expenses while I saved money. I told her that she was acting as if I put my mom's name on the title, which is ridiculous, but she said that I have no respect for her opinions and kept undermining her input. We've been going back and forth on this since then. She's now letting me know that if I don't take the key back, then she'll do it herself. I think that she's being irrational and unreasonable action like that over a copy of a house key. This decision that I made could save us in case of an emergency, but she kept downplaying it. Also, I think it's crucial to mention that there's no conflict between my mother and my wife.

They're on near-perfect terms. All right, hold on a pee, hold on. Let me make sure I understood this correctly. For a period of time, you weren't paying rent or daily expenses so you could save money. Meanwhile your wife was covering the rent and the daily expenses all by herself. Uh, yeah Opie, I'm on your wife's side on this one. She definitely contributed to the house. You think that because she paid rent and you saved money, that that means that whatever you buy with that money is 100% yours because, oh, my wife was stupid enough to waste money on rent.

No, that's not how that works. As far as I'm concerned, every single penny that your wife spent on your half of the rent and your half of the daily expenses counts towards buying this house. And like, that's the thing. That's not even relevant to the story because your wife has a legitimate financial claim to this house. And like that's the thing, that's not even relevant to the story because your wife has a legitimate financial claim to this house. But even if she didn't, she would still be on the right.

Here's what a boy is down to. You and your wife are living in this house together. Your mother is not. You tour our partners, which means that you both need to consider each other's feelings. Your wife is deeply bothered by this. You keep saying it's not a big deal. Well, if it's not a big deal, then take the key back. Clearly, it's making your wife uncomfortable, so what's the issue? Like, you're calling her irrational and unreasonable, but it's you who's being irrational and unreasonable. So if this is your wife's boundary, then respect your boundary. And like, I don't want to hear the argument of like, well, I have a boundary too, and my boundary is to let them my mom into the house

Yeah, that doesn't really apply because boundaries are to be respected within the marriage itself, right? This is a husband wife problem if one of you has a boundary that says we can't let other people into the circle and you have a boundary That says we do have to let my mom into the circle then I'm sorry, but her boundary trumps your boundary. OP, I'm giving your wife zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving you one out of five buttholes. Am I the butthole for refusing to change a custody agreement because I'm not being offered anything in return? My ex and I share a 50-50 custody of our nine-year-old son. Basically, we have him every other week. She also has a 5 year old son from her second marriage. They're divorced and their custody agreement is like ours, except that she has the 5 year

old on the week that I have our 9 year old. Her second ex-husband refused to work around our custody agreement, so my ex asked me to change ours. This is a huge deal, and the reality is, I can't just sign off on it. If I just say okay, then she'll start asking for more accommodations at my expense. I told her to think about what she's going to offer me to go along with this plan. She got mad that I wouldn't just do it. Honestly, if she would have offered me something like an extra holiday, then I would have gone along with it. She even said that she wasn't going to pay my legal fees because a judge has to sign off on any custody changes in our state. Now she's pissed that I don't care.

Alright, I'm going to read this reply from MythRand or Gray because this person's a professional and they can say it way better than I could. I work in a family law office and dealing with buttholes like you are the worst part of my job by far. Instead of doing what's in the best interest of your children, like preserving a healthy co-parenting relationship that will make your children's lives materially better, you're choosing to be a major butthole. Worst of all, it's the kids who usually suffer the most when you have a parent being a great a butthole like you are. You're the butthole all the way.

You're, if f you got mine, attitude disgusts me. Yep, I'm giving the x-wife here zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving you three out of five buttholes. Please stop thinking about how you can screw over your x-wife and think about what's best for your kids. My god! Am I the butthole for accepting my family's Christmas invitation despite my husband being upset? I'm a 32 year old woman and I met this wonderful man, Philip, who's 36 two years ago. We got married four months ago.

For context, I have a 10 year old son, Billy, from my previous relationship, but my ex isn't in the picture. I have to admit that Philip's relationship with my family isn't so great. They disagree on a lot of things. For example, Philip had an argument with my dad when my dad said that Philip was keeping their grandson away from them. But Philip said that he wasn't doing that, that my dad just couldn't visit with Billy because he had to work. I was sick at the time. The latest argument has made things worse. My mom and sister were discussing natural remedies for my niece. They're into that kind of thing.

And Philip, who's a pediatrician, called both of them ignorant for not using medications instead, which caused a huge argument. And as a result, Philip is no longer welcome at my parents' house. Now, my parents have sent me and billion invitation for Christmas, but they didn't include Philip, which I expected given how strained their relationship has become. I called my mom to confirm that I would attend. But the minute Philip found out, he went off on me saying that he couldn't believe that I was fine with my family excluding him and then agreed to go and just leave him behind. I told him it's their celebration and I don't get to decide their guestless forum. And also, I'm not leaving him behind because we didn't have any plans for Christmas.

He said that he thought that we would automatically celebrate together with the three of us, but now I'm taking Billy away from him as well. I thought that was a bit melodramatic because it's literally just a few hours at my parents home, but he insisted it was about principle and respect. We had a big argument, and I said that he basically alienated himself by continually picking arguments with my family, but he started ranting, saying that it wasn't about the fact that they didn't invite him, but the fact that I was willing to let him spin Christmas alone without me and Billy. We went back and forth on the issue, but we haven't seen to reach a solution.

My parents are used to spending every major holiday with Billy, so you can see how much pressure I'm getting from both sides here. Opie, you have found yourself a man who is a doctor, a pediatrician, and who actively wants to spend time with your son from another relationship during the holidays. You have found what most people will consider a catch. The way that you're treating this catch is to not defend him in front of your parents, to abandon him to have Christmas by himself so that you can take your parents side over his side and to argue with him instead of working things out together as a family.

I don't know what to say this. I think that your husband might be a better person than you and you should be careful, OP, because you might just lose him. And I really want to reiterate, it sounds like you got a catch here because he's done nothing wrong. Not a thing. I literally can't find a single thing he did wrong here. He had to work. Of course he has to work. He's a freaking pediatrician. One of the most noble, demanding and honorable professions on planet Earth.

I will admit that he probably shouldn't have called your mom ignorance regarding the natural medicine. But, you know, maybe, know, maybe listen to a pediatrician when it comes to the health of children. Considering, you know, considering the job of a pediatrician is to understand the health of children. I mean, that's literally what they go to medical school for like eight years for. So I can understand his frustration there.

O.P., when I read the line, I called my mom to confirm that I would attend. I was thinking, wuh, why? That-that doesn't even make sense. Why would you choose your parents over your husband? Girl, you're married to the man. Stand by your man, please.

Like, yeah, you don't get to decide who your parents add to the guest list, but you do get to decide if you go or not. And if you actually go and take your son instead of spending the holiday with your husband, then that might be the last holiday you ever get with that husband, if I'm being honest. Opie, like, you've hit the jackpot girl. I don't want to make this about money, okay? I realize that pediatricians, they rake it in. I'm not saying she hit the jackpot in terms of like having a rich husband.

I'm saying this in terms of like, he's smart clearly because he's a doctor. He's a doctor, he's a PD attrition at that. He wants to spend time with you, he wants to spend time with your steps on, who's not even his, but he still loves him like a true father. And, OP, girl, come on, man girl come on man come on women would murder another human being to find a man like this and you're like yeah well I don't want to spend Christmas with you wait hold on you know what I just realized you got married four months ago which

means this is his first official Christmas with you as his wife and with Billy as his son and you are taking that away from him because he's having a minor fight with your parents. Man, man, okay, this is getting worse than what I think about it. OP, you are definitely, definitely the butthole here. I'm giving you 2.5 out of 5 buttholes, I'm giving your husband 0 out of 5 buttholes. That was our slash of my the butthole, and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.

That was our slash of my The Butthole, and if you like this content be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.