rSlash - r/AmITheA**hole for Accidentally Giving My Cousin $50,000?

Episode Date: February 22, 2022

r/AmITheA**hole In today's episode, OP has a tradition with his family where he gives them lottery tickets every Christmas. This year, his cousin's ticket was a winner and he won an whopping $50,000. As soon as OP's wife found out about this, she immediately told OP to ask for the winning ticket back, saying that they need $50,000 more than the cousin does. OP refuses, so she calls flips out and gives him the silent treatment as punishment. Is OP the butthole here? Get Honey for FREE at joinhoney.com/rslash Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to our slash, Am I the Butthole, where OP accidentally gives us Cousin $50,000? Am I the Butthole for giving my Cousin $50,000 against my wife's wishes? I had a belated Christmas gathering last week with my extended family. The custom for this event is that we exchange stocking stuffers, nothing over 10 bucks. Ever since we've had this gathering, I've always bought scratch-off lottery tickets for all the adults. As you would expect, they're almost always trash. But every year we have a few hit for an extra ticket, $2, $5, or even $10. One year my uncle's ticket hit for 50 bucks and everyone went crazy. It's always a good time. So this year, my 23 year old cousin goes nuts. He holds up his ticket and claims it had just hit for the max jackpot.

$50,000. Everyone rushes over. A couple of my uncles verify, and yep, this kid just won $50,000. I was effing a lady. I scooped him up in a big bear hug and said, Mary Christmas, you lucky a-hole. He was screaming and his mom was actually in tears and the whole room was excited. It was literally one of the top 10 experiences of my life. I feel my phone vibrating my pocket and I pull it out to see my wife as it me a text message that says, come out

to the car. I go outside and I can tell by her body language that she's pissed. She told me there's no way that we're giving my cousin $50,000. Then starts fussing at me about buying the lotto tickets to begin with. Two things to explain. I'm not saying that 50K isn't a lot of money. It's a ton, but I'm in my mid-40s. I have a two-decade professional career. My wife is a stay-at-home mom by choice. We drive later model cars that are paid for.

Our retirements and the kids' college accounts are fully funded. Our only debt is the house. I'm saying all this to show that, while 50k would be nice to have, it's not life-changing money for us. My cousin, on the other hand, just graduated from college. His mom is single, and she's one of those fiercely independent women who refuse charity. She took on extra jobs to help them pay for school. He worked at least two jobs himself while going to school full-time and still managed to get on the dean's list.

But nonetheless, he had to take out loans. He landed a job, but he can't afford a car yet or to live close to the office, so he's looking at nearly a two-hour commute. He's also saving up for an engagement ring for his sweet girlfriend of three years. This money would literally change this kid's life, and frankly, I think that it couldn't have gone to a better member of my family. I explained to my wife that we're not giving my cousin $50,000. We're giving him a ticket that I spend five bucks on. She's not buying it and she won't let it go. She's now demanding that I go

back in there and that I take the ticket back from him, saying maybe that we'll give him some of the winnings. We argue a little bit, and I can't get her to explain why she wants this money so bad other than it's ours and you're not giving this away. We fought all the way home, and she hasn't spoken more than a couple of words to me since. Am I the butthole? Okay, so children, when they're like five years old, learn that there's no tasty backststays. They're just aren't because that's not how the rules work. You can't give someone a gift and then when you find out that his value will be like, oh, actually, I'd like that back, please. Also, I'm quite confident that there have been many,

many cases exactly like this where someone gives someone else a ticket and then they get salty about it because it's a winning ticket and they won it back. And I would bet you that in 99% of those cases, if it ever goes to court, then the person who received the ticket absolutely owns the ticket. Because that's how gifts work. Okay, so don't get me wrong here. The wife is absolutely a butthole. But I think that I'm going to deviate from the norm here and say that O P you do deserve a slight butthole score. Because very clearly obviously your wife is not okay with you giving away a $50,000 ticket. So if you're going to give your friends and family members tickets that could be worth that much, you really should have double checked with your wife beforehand.

I mean, if you want to get your cousin a box of chocolates, fine, you don't need permission. If you want to give him a gift card, sure no permission needed. But with lot of tickets since the ticket could be a huge winner which could lead to hurt feelings which could lead to jealousy, I would really really think that the smart move would be to double check with your partner beforehand and make sure that they're okay with you giving away tickets as a gift. So for that reason, OP, I think I have to give you like 0.5 out of five buttholes, a very, very weak score, just because, to be honest, you kind of put yourself in this situation. Because like, even if it wasn't your wife,

it could have just as easily been, you know, another family member who got upset because this type of situation is kind of a powder keg for hurt feelings. Now luckily, it does seem like your family, like your blood family, this related to your cousin, is really, really happy for your cousin genuinely and that there isn't any jealousy,

but unfortunately your wife doesn't feel that way. Your wife is clearly being a jealous, bitter butthole. I'm giving her a three out of five buttholes. That is absolutely not your money. Am I the butthole for believing the housekeeper over my son? We hired a housekeeper that comes over several times a week to get the house clean since my husband and I are busy with work. We have two kids, Jeremy who's 16 and Raya who's 14.

So Jeremy is a jokester and he likes pulling pranks on everyone in the house. And that includes the housekeeper. He's done stuff like throw her purse, hide her wallet, and then he gets punished for it, then told to not do it again. Because our housekeeper almost quit, and we didn't want that. Now onto the current situation.

Some days ago, I got a call from Jeremy while he was having friends over, telling me that he saw the housekeeper sneak some of my jewelry into her purse, and he asked me to come home immediately. I freaked out and tried to call my husband, but he didn't pick up. I went home and I was mad. I talked to the housekeeper, and she denied putting anything in her purse. I demanded to see her purse, and my jewelry was there. The housekeeper started swearing on her children that she didn't put it in there, and she had no idea how it got there. I believed her, and I figured out that Jeremy had something to

do with this given his history. I switched my attention towards him, and I had him explain to me exactly how he saw our housekeeper do it. He told me what he saw, but a friend of his came forward, and said that he saw Jeremy put the jewelry inside the lady's purse and was trying to get her in trouble. Jeremy yelled at his friend and then told me that it was just one of his pranks, but I was furious. I kicked the rest of his friends who covered form out of the house and I pushed him hard and apologized to the housekeeper.

My husband reacted unexpectedly after he heard this and said that I was in the wrong for choosing to believe the housekeeper over our son, even though there was a witness. But he said that Jeremy's friend must have said this to get him in trouble, or because the housekeeper paid that friend aside with her, which was shockingly absurd of him to say. He said that I'm not a good mother, and that my first instinct as a mother should be to always believe my son, whatever he says, and never question him in front of his friends like that. I'm confused. Did I mess up?

Okay, hold on. So first of all, you did believe your son. He called you up, he said the housekeeper was dealing, so you were like, oh my god, the housekeeper is stealing and you rushed home and you confronted her. And you looked inside the purse and saw that there was your jewelry. So the thing that he wants you to do, you did. And he says that you shouldn't question your son in front of your friends, but you didn't.

All you did was ask him to explain what he saw, which even if you did believe is a very reasonable question to ask. And that's when the friend came forward. So, your husband wants you to give your son the benefit of the doubt, but you did. You did time and time again. And this guy's saying that the housekeeper paid off a friend to be on her side, oh my god, give me a break. This is just, this guy is sticking his head in the sand to put it simply.

He's choosing the outcome that he wants, and then just imagining evidence to support that claim. Also, let's not forget that this is a very serious accusation. If you had backed up your son on this, and the friend hadn't come forward, and all of Jeremy's friend had also backed this up, then you could have called the cops, she could have ended up literally in jail for something that she didn't even do. So, no OP, what you did was very reasonable, logical, and honestly, you're being a good parent. Your husband however is not being a parent. I'm giving you zero out of five buttholes, I'm giving your husband

three out of five buttholes, I'm giving Jeremy four out of five buttholes. At this point he's not a prankster, he's just a mean bully. Today's episode is sponsored by Honey. I don't know about you but I do literally 100% of my shopping online. Because of COVID I pretty much have to shop online because yeah I don't know about you, but I do literally 100% of my shopping online. Because of COVID, I pretty much have to shop online because, yeah, I don't want to catch COVID and die. But on top of that, I read stories for a living, so I can't afford to sound like this for three weeks straight. Don't you hate it when you get to check out and you don't have a code to put in that little

promo code box? With honey, you never have to leave that box empty. Honey is a free shopping tool that scours the internet for promo codes and automatically applies them to your cart. For example, I buy a lot of audio equipment and I just saved 15 bucks on a microphone with Honey at checkout. If you don't already have Honey, you could be straight up missing out. It's literally free and installs in a few seconds. And by getting it, you'll be doing yourself a solid and supporting this podcast. I'd never recommend something that I don't use. Get Honey for Free at joinhoney.com slash r slash. That's joinhoney.com slash r slash.

Am I the butthole for siding with a home wrecker? My sister Annie is 30 years old and she's obsessed with a girl. Let's call her Jane who's in her 20s. My sister thinks that her husband cheated on her with Jane in mid 2020. I don't know why. Jane's not the first girl that she's been obsessed with or the last. She was actually a decent girl. She didn't realize that he was married and she broke it off when she found out. Then she sent the proof of his cheating to his wife. Somehow, he spun this as she's trying to break us up and my sister fell for it. Which is stupid because Jane already blocked him on everything. He's the one who basically stalked her for months after that. Anyway, Annie's been stalking Jane's socials.

Anytime Jane posts about something bad happening, Annie calls me up to gloat. Anytime Jane posts about something good that happened, Annie starts crying about how it's not fair. In the last few months, Jane apparently got a high paying new job, got engaged, and is pregnant. Annie had a full blown milk down over it. Jane is all she ever wants to talk about. She calls me at least twice a week to talk about this, and she texts me multiple times a day. She doesn't want advice, she doesn't want to leave her husband, she just wants to vent endlessly. My other sister is also tired of this, but my mom says that we need to be gentle because it's hard for Annie. I just wanted to stop. I've tried sympathy, tough love, changing the subject, suggesting

counseling, nothing works. It's non-stop. Jainted this, jainted that. I hit my boiling point this morning when she was going on about how Jane's fiance would cheat because she's too fat. For clarity, she's pregnant, and that would make her baby a bastard. Then she said, I don't care because I won and she lost. She had him for a week, but I have him for a lifetime. For some reason, this made me snap. I told Annie that she won a slimy cereal cheater who likes to creep on barely legal teens, who's never supported her through illness or depression, who never lifts a finger around the house, sulks about having to babysit his own kids, constantly makes mean jokes about her, and criticizes

her appearance harshly even though he's below average in looks. I said something like, maybe you're obsessed with Jane's life because your life is a massive dumpster fire. Since then, I had to deactivate my socials because I'm getting non-stop hate from Annie, her friends, and extended family for being cruel. Apparently I have no morals and I condone cheating. But none of them are going for the actual cheater though, just me for pointing out that he's a cheater. My other sister says

that I wasn't wrong, but I was a butthole for saying it harshly, and that Annie is a victim too. I don't know, Reddit. Am I? Opie. It sounds like your sister needs some therapy or something serious to happen, because I kinda know what this is. Denial, projection, something. In any event, Opie, if you really want to get under your sister's skin, you know that all you have to do is post on social media about all the amazing things that are happening in your life. Anyways OP, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes, I'm giving your sister 2 out of 5 buttholes, and I'm giving your brother-in-law 4 out of 5 buttholes.

Am I the butthole for getting upset with my husband after he told me that nothing will change while I'm pregnant? So I'm a 26 year old woman and my husband, Jake, who's 28, have been together for 5 years, married for 3. We've recently started trying to have a baby because we both felt like that was the next step in our life together, and 3 weeks ago I got a positive test back. We were really really happy and we told our families, and now my mom and mother-in-law want to throw a big baby shower for us. It was just super good news all around.

Well, two nights ago, me and Jake were getting ready for bed when he reminds me to go through the house and make sure that all the lights are off. Now, he can be a little lazy at times, and it's become a nightly routine for me to make sure that all the lights are off that he leaves on before we go to bed. I wasn't feeling very well and I asked if he could just do it since he wasn't doing anything and was literally standing by the door. He then tells me, no this is what's expected of you every night. I was a little hurt but I didn't want to fight with him, so I just did it. When I came back, Jake goes on this very long, unprovoked rant saying things like, just because you're pregnant doesn't mean anything will change. And you're still expected to

cook, clean, and do all the chores every day, because how can you be expected to be a mother if you can't handle a little work? He wasn't yelling or anything, he was just talking to me quietly like I was two inches tall. I was shocked because I had never heard him say anything like this. His rant went on for about 30 minutes before I interjected and asked, well what do you plan on doing to help me with all this? He then got extremely defensive saying that he works as butt off at his job to provide for me and our future children. For context, I don't work at the moment. My job wasn't paying enough to justify me going, so I'm a full-time

college student. He ended by saying that it doesn't matter how I feel physically or mentally. It's a mother's job to push through, and if he helped and babyed me, then I wouldn't be a good mother. I got extremely upset and I started yelling and I said, I wish I would have known this is how you felt before I got pregnant with your baby. There was a moment of silence before he started crying, and he left for the night to state his mother's house. He hasn't been back yet, and my mother-in-law and sister-in-law have been calling me berating

me, saying that I broke Jake's heart with what I said, and that I need to apologize immediately. And until I do, he isn't coming home. I don't know how to feel. So, am I the butthole for yelling at my husband after he said that he isn't helping me with anything during the pregnancy, because it's a mother's job to just deal with it. Wait, hold on. So this guy ranted at you for like 30 minutes straight. And then when you said one single sentence to him, he starts crying and runs off to his mommy. Oh, P, I really hate to tell people to break up when I read these posts because it's just so easy for me to say, oh, well, you're dating such a butthole so you should just dump them and move on with your life. And you

know you've got a history and you're literally carrying his child so there's a lot of issues here at stake. But like if he's going to be this sensitive and treat you this badly when you're pregnant with his child then it can't possibly get any better, can it? I mean, logically, the best treatment that a woman should ever get from her husband should be when she's pregnant, right? Because she's literally carrying the guy's child. So if you can't respect you here, then can you really be confident that he'll respect you in the future? So I hate to say this OP, but this is a really bad red flag.

If I were you, I would be reevaluating my entire relationship with this guy. OP, you get 0 out of 5 buttholes. Your husband gets 4 out of 5 buttholes. That was our slash of my the butthole, and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put on your Reddit podcast episodes every single day. all of my podcasts because I put on your Reddit podcast episodes every single day.