rSlash - r/AmITheA**hole For Calling The Cops On A Woman Who Stole From Me?

Episode Date: February 9, 2021

r/AmITheA**hole In today's episode, OP has a garden in his backyard where he grows vegetables. After his new neighbor moves in next door, he goes out to garden one day and finds his neighbor and her teenage kid stealing vegetables right out of his garden. He called the cops, naturally, and now this Karen is trying to convince everyone in the neighborhood that OP is a butthole for calling the cops on her because she should be allowed to steal his vegetables. Theft is theft, lady! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What do I love getting my holiday gifts at Chopper's Drug Mart? The PC Optimum Points. Perfume for Mom? Points for me. Gaming console for the kids? Points for me. Chalkets for the teachers? Oh yeah, points for me. Shoppers. You should totally go. Exclusions of life.

Welcome to R-Slash, a podcast where I read the best post from across Reddit. Today's subreddit is R-Slash Amid the Butthole, where OP admits to abusing their own cats. Am I the Butthole for lying to my cat? Oh God, this is stupid, but I was told to ask others for their opinion so here I am. I'm a 23 year old girl, and my 19 year old girlfriend claims that I suck for lying to my 2 year old cat. I don't like my cat roaming around the kitchen when I'm not there, just because he might get his less than average intelligence pals on something that he shouldn't. So, I gotta get him out of there when I leave.

I keep a tiny bag of kitty treats, and sometimes when he refuses to come when I call his name, I shake the little bag to get him out and close the door behind him. Here's the problem. I don't actually give him a treat every time that I do this. Sometimes I just pick him up and give him a big ol' smooch, and sometimes he gets a treat. My girlfriend thinks that this counts as being mean to my cat because he might be expecting a treat and the disappointing him is cruel. This isn't a serious fight, just something that sometimes comes up when I don't give him treats. It isn't creating any problems between us, but this time she said, ask literally anyone else if they think you're being fair, so we'll be reading the responses together. Ma'am, this is the internet.

Anything less than showering your cats with love and affection earns you an automatic 5 out of 5 buttholes. There's a special layer of hell reserved for people like you. Am I the butthole for being frustrated that my girlfriend doesn't work hard at her job and gets paid nearly twice as much as I do? My girlfriend and I both work in tech. I've been at one place since college. But since I was a kid, I've been at one place since college. I've been at one place since college. I've been at one place since college. I've been at one place since college.

I've been at one place since college. I've been at one place since college. I've been at one place since college. I've been at one place since college. I've been at one place since college. I've been at one place since college. I've been at one place since college. I've been at one place since college. 6K, and she credits a lot of that to job hopping, she's 25 and has had 3 full time jobs in college.

I've been at one place since college, but since we've been working from home, I've seen a lot of her daily schedule, and her schedule versus mine are really different. She gets up at 915 to drag herself into the home office for her 930-10 daily meeting. After the meeting, she goes and showers and has breakfast from about 10 to 10.45, answering a few Slack messages and emails on her phone, but mostly just listening to podcasts and eating and doing her morning routine. Then she works till noon and takes a lunch break from noon until 1. Then she works from 1 to 4, often having meetings are working on her own stuff. And at 4pm, she'll spend an hour or so doing household chores and stuff while keeping an eye on her phone to answer emails. And outside of 9 topm, she'll spend an hour or so doing household chores and stuff while keeping an eye on her phone to answer emails.

And outside of 9-5 hours a day. I don't take breaks in the work day to shower or eat breakfast and lunch and do household chores. And a few weeks ago, I got kind of frustrated with her for basically hardly doing anything for her job at all. I said they were overpaying her if she was spending half the day slacking. She got frustrated with me and said they hired her for her knowledge and it wasn't my place to say what her time was worth. That if her boss and CEO saw the work she produced

and chose to pay her what they chose to pay her, then it wasn't my place to undervalue her because I was being jealous. And that she picked her job instead of one that might pay better because she wanted a good work life balance. She was sick of wasting her life away at work that was a lot more demanding. I said that she was being a little privileged. Not a lot of people can just choose to make six figures and wander off from work for practically half the day. And that all I was saying was that she was working half as hard as a lot of people who are on a lot less.

She got mad at me and said that it's not up to me to decide what her time is worth. In either butthole for what I said about my girlfriend's work ethic? Alright OP, to answer your question I'm going to share a personal story from my own life and my own relationship with my wife. So my wife works at a state university, which means she's a government employee, so right off the bat, she gets tons of vacation time. And then on top of that, because she works at a school, whenever the students get let-out, she does too, so she gets all those like spring breaks and long Christmas breaks as well.

What that means is she has a very, very generous vacation package. In contrast to that, I'm a professional YouTuber and podcaster. I literally do not get days off. If I don't publish an episode for a day, that means I just don't make money for that day. So my wife can take weeks and weeks off of work and get paid for that time, but I can't. Also, I publish episodes every single weekend, which means if I don't want to work on those weekends, I have to work extra during the weekend order to cover those weekends.

If I want to take like a two week vacation, I can't just email YouTube and be like, hey, YouTube, I'm going to take a two week vacation, please keep paying me. No, I have to just make those two weeks of videos ahead of time. So OP, trust me when I say that I really understand where you're coming from. When spring break rolls around and my wife gets a free week of paid vacation and I have to just keep grinding away, then yeah, I do feel envious. However, and this is the big difference here. When I'm feeling envious of my wife's vacation days, I feel sadness for me, not anger for her. I'm thrilled when she gets those vacation days because she works hard at her job and she deserves that time off.

Plus, you know, I love my wife and I want her to be happy. I would be absolutely thrilled if my wife made twice as much money than me and worked less hours than me. That's how relationships are supposed to work, if you love someone then you'll celebrate their triumphs. So what I'm trying to say OP is, envy is a very understandable emotion in your shoes. It's okay to experience envy. I experience envy.

However, it's not okay to let that envy manifest in negative ways towards your girlfriend. I would never, ever trash on my wife for getting those vacation days. But admittedly, there have been some times where I'm like, you know, Nicole, I'm kinda sad that I can't take vacation with you, but I'm really happy you got this time off. OP, your girlfriend gets zero out of five buttholes and you get 1.5 out of 5 buttholes. Also, just to be clear, I may have made it sound like I work every single day including the weekends, and that's not the case. I work pretty normal hours Monday through Friday, and if I want to have videos to cover vacation time like for holidays or for the weekend, that just means I have to work

extra during the week. You're flying to meet with a new supplier to keep your business growing. And with the business platinum card from American Express, you can earn $820 in new value and more, which includes a $200 travel credit toward your flight. Now, boarding business class. American Express, don't do business without it. Terms and conditions apply visit mx.ca slash business platinum. Metro links and cross links are reminding everyone to be careful as Eglinton Cross-town LRT train testing is in progress. Please be alert, this trains can pass

at any time on the tracks. Remember to follow all traffic signals. Be careful along our tracks, and only make left turns where it's safe to do so. Be alert, be aware, and stay safe. Am I the butthole for telling my parents they only have one daughter, and she's six feet in the ground? This all started when I was 12 years old,

and my younger sister was 10. Let's call my younger sister Abby. Well, Abby started to get sick and no one in the family knew what was going on. I started to be dropped off of my grandparents as my parents went off to different doctors. I'm not going to get into realness, but when the doctors figured it out, it was bad, so a lot of time was devoted to my sister. When I was 14, it got worse, and I started to be left with my grandparents for longer amounts of time. It started with just staying the weekend, and then maybe the whole week. I would bring it up, and my parents would tell me they would have to focus on Abby. Soon I was staying in my grandparents for months. By the time I was 16, I was basically living

with my grandparents full time. I would see my parents and Abby maybe every other month. If I texted them about this, I would always get the same response. We need to focus on Abby right now. I'm 19 now, and Abby's passed away from her illness. Her funeral was two weeks ago and I attended through FaceTime. I got a call today for my parents and they went into meet up and be a family again. I told them they abandoned one child for another, I am not their child anymore. That they only have one daughter and she's six feet under the ground now and then I hung

up. I've been getting text calling me a butthole and that I should understand they needed to focus on Abby and to suck it up basically. So am I the butthole? Down in the comments, I'm going to read this reply from Redoubtable South. Not the butthole. Was in the comments, I'm gonna read this reply from Redoubtable South. Not the butthole. Was it harsh? Yes.

Was it deserved? Also yes. While I can sympathize with dealing with a terminally ill child, they still had another child that needed their love and attention too. A child that was losing her little sister probably scared and lonely and then they freaking abandoned her for seven years. Yes, Abby did need them, but you did too, and they failed you miserably. And they failed Abby too, who might have enjoyed a relationship with her sister in the

few years she had left to live. Yeah, I really agree with this poster. Outside of my wife, my younger brother is basically my closest friend in the whole world. So if my younger brother was dying and my parents basically separated him and me, then I don't think I would ever forgive them for that. You get 0 out of 5 but holes OP, your parents get the full 5 out of 5 but holes. I will say that your parents were probably trying to do the right thing, but they went about it in completely the wrong way.

Am I the but hole for calling my brother an insecure, testicle-grabbing showbindous man-baby over his comments about my wife's makeup? That's the actual quote. I'm still pissed as hell, but maybe I went too far here. My brother and I are both in our late 30s. We get a long find most of the time, but my brother doesn't do well in a lot of social situations. He says things that are inappropriate, gets overly opinionated, yells a lot, etc.

He just doesn't seem to understand, tact, or when to let things go in a casual conversation. Our wives are best friends, they talk almost every day on FaceTime. My wife is an ex-model and actress and very good with makeup. She's in her mid-30s, we have three kids, and she doesn't wear much makeup anymore. But she got some as a gift for Christmas and decided she wanted to get more. Apparently she's been buying cheap stuff and she wanted to spurgle on some good stuff. Anyway, she's been testing it all out over the last month, buying more here and there and doing these crazy eyeshadow things.

Honestly, I don't know what I'm talking about. She looks great all the time. She's gorgeous without makeup. She's really talented with it though and she's having a lot of fun. I tease her a little since she works from home and she's wearing pajamas, but her makeup looks like she's at a nightclub. I think it's cute and funny. My brother thinks she's doing it because she's cheating or she wants to cheat. He called me this morning to say he's concerned because he's seen her on FaceTime and he's decided she must be posting pictures or sending pictures

to some dude or multiple dudes. I tried to blow it off and explain that that wasn't going on, but he got more aggressive about it, so I ended up yelling at him and shouting the insecure testicle man, baby thing. He's being ridiculous needs to mind his own business, but I think that I might be the butthole for blowing up a name calling when he's probably well-intentioned. Also, I want to add, no, I haven't asked my wife why she's recently started wearing more makeup and I'm not going to because I think that's frickin' rude. She's spending her money on stuff for her face and it's a creative hobby. I'm not going to be the dick that ruins someone's creative outlet by asking them to justify it or by insinuating there's a sinister motive behind it. It makes her happy, so I assume

that's why she's doing it. It makes her happy, so I assume that's why she's doing it. Asking why is dominant insulting in my opinion. OP, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes because every husband should defend their wife. If my brother said something critical of my wife, you would better believe I would shut that down. That being said, while your brother was being kind of showvinistic, he was coming from a place of concern so I can't be too harsh on him. I guess I'll give your brother 1.5 out of 5 buttholes. That was our Slash of My The Butthole and if you like this content be sure to follow my podcast because I put on new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.