rSlash - r/AmITheA**hole for Pranking the Neighborhood Brat?

Episode Date: December 18, 2021

r/AmITheA**hole In today's episode, OP lives next to a spoiled little brat who keeps trying to prank him with ding dong ditch. OP sets up a camera to figure out who the culprit is, and then sets a trap. He patiently waits behind his front door with a bucket of water. The next time the neighborhood kid comes to prank OP again, OP just opens the door and douses the kid with a bucket of water! Of course, the kid goes and whines to his parents, who call OP the butthole for pranking their precious baby. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You went past business casual, spent all night practicing that presentation, you rolled up to the office ready to rock that 9 a.m. Until you remembered it was off-site. When you need to look good showing up late, own it. With the all new 2024 Chevrolet Tracks RS. Welcome to R-Slash, am I the butthole where OP throws a bucket of water at a spoiled brat? Am I the Butthole for throwing water on a kid who kept doing ding dong ditch? Due to job opportunities, we recently moved to a new neighborhood. While most things were going fairly smoothly,

at around 4 p.m. we'd hear a couple of knocks on our door. And when we went to see who it was, to our surprise, there was nobody there. It was only until a couple of weeks later that we thought there could be a possibility of someone doing ding dong ditch. We just never thought about it because everyone here seemed really relaxed, so ding dong ditch never crossed our minds. As to not resort to any extreme measures, we put up a sign near the door saying, please

don't trouble the people inside by doing these silly pranks, which didn't work. Since it didn't work, we resorted to asking people about it. But all I got was that this was some sort of tradition for kids in the neighborhood to do this to new people in the area. This kind of irked me because Ding Dong ditches really annoying, so I set up a camera inside our house to capture who was outside our door. After reviewing the footage multiple times, I was able to confirm that it was some brat who was a couple of meters away. I went to speak to his parents, but they laughed it off saying kids will be kids. So I decided that I would do something about it myself. After three days, the kid came back, but I was hiding behind an unlocked door with a large water bucket. As soon as he knocked and turned, I opened the door and splashed him with water. I thought that was that, but the kid's parents came over not even 10 minutes

later, demanding to know why I soaked their kid in water. I tried to justify my reasoning, but to no avail. I'm conflicted and feel like a butthole because I used a petty way of getting that kid to stop annoying us. I would love to hear your opinions on this as well. Opie, you get 0 out of 5 buttholes. The kid fucked around and he found out. I'll give the kid 1 out of 5 buttholes and I'll give the parents 1.5 out of 5 buttholes. Besides, I don't know why they're so angry. It's just a prank, bro! Am I the butthole for leaving my boyfriend stranded at a party for making a joke? I'm a 19 year old girl, and I've been with my boyfriend who's 25 for about 6 months. We don't live together, but I spend a lot of my time at his place. A week or so ago, I was feeling quite sick. Not wanting to drive

home, I spent the night at his place. He woke me up at about 5 a.m. and to my great embarrassment, I had wet the bed. I helped him clean up the best I could. I had a temperature of about 103.8 degrees Fahrenheit, and he took me to the hospital. They kept me overnight. Also, for context, 103 degrees Fahrenheit is about 39 degrees Celsius. A few days later, when I saw him again, I apologized for what happened. He told me it's alright, and that he got me a gift. He pulled out a package of adult diapers and threw them at me. I told him that I didn't

think that it was very funny and explained that I was embarrassed, but he thought that it was hilarious. I decided to let it go and talk about it later. We went to a party that night. Not really a party, just us and six other friends about an hour away. I drove since he doesn't have a car. After he had a few beers, he started loudly telling them what had happened, forgetting to mention that I was sick and had a high fever. Just the part about me wetting the bed and him buying me diapers. He encouraged my friends to joke about it, and after I tried to explain the situation, but they talked over me and laughed at me,

I just left and went home. My boyfriend is obviously quite upset that I left without him. I just didn't want to be stuck in a car with him for an hour. He sent me several texts since then, most of which are calling me too sensitive and not able to take a joke. Some of my friends agree with him. Am I the butthole? OP, I think the only solution here is to apologize and say, I'm really sorry, but I got you a gift, then throw a bus pass at him.

Okay Opie, all jokes aside, I really hope that you see this as the very clear red flag that it is. You were sick, and not just like, I have the sniffles in bed. No, you had a fever of almost 104 degrees. That is super dangerous. The hospital literally kept you overnight, so you were extremely sick. And I don't know what your previous relationship is like, but I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that this is probably the most you have ever needed your boyfriend's help. I mean unless your boyfriend pulled you from a burning vehicle, my guess is that you

running 104 degree fever is pretty much the most you have ever had to rely on him because you were seriously ill. And yeah, he took you to the hospital. But after that, he chose to mock your illness, to mock this like vulnerable position that you were in and teach you about it publicly in front of other people. What's? Keep in mind, OP, that one of the most common vows for marriage is in sickness and in health. Clearly your boyfriend has no interest in respecting you if you get sick, so do you really want to be married to that guy? Why keep him around as a boyfriend? OP, it's important to understand that your boyfriend wasn't making a joke, he was just straight up humiliating you. OP, you get zero out of five buttholes. I'm giving your boyfriend 2.5 out of 5 buttholes.

Am I the butthole for telling my boyfriend's roommate to get over himself after he told me to stop having sleepovers at the apartment? So, I've been with my boyfriend for 4 months. He has a roommate, Justin, who's a bit of a self-righteous jerk sometimes. The problem started when I started having sleepovers with my boyfriend in the apartment. Justin looked super annoyed whenever he saw me over, which is five days a week. He just keep huffing and puffing and speak to me rudely. He said nothing until yesterday when he got back and found me and started a fight with me,

telling me to stop having sleepovers. I asked him what the F is your problem, and he looked at me and with a straight face said, if you're going to come over here and use water, electricity, and what not five days a week, then you might as well start paying rent. I responded telling him that my boyfriend pays rent, and I use what he uses, then called him rude and told him to get over himself. He told me that he'll get the landlord involved, and my boyfriend asked me to leave so he could talk to Justin.

I grabbed my stuff and left, feeling awful. My boyfriend later called, saying that I was rude in what I said. And he said that his roommate did have a point, especially since I'm using everything in the apartment, from the microwave, shower, charger, and so on. So his roommate felt that it was unfair, and my boyfriend asked me to tune down my visits for now. We had an argument after I said that he sided with his roommate over me to keep the piece and I ended the call.

We haven't talked since then. Am I the butthole? Did I go too far? Yeah, OP, honestly, you are the butthole. This isn't your apartment, it is Justin's apartment. And Justin theoretically is paying half of all those utilities, so when you come over and spend all that time, basically racking up his utility bill, then he has to foot the payments. Also if you're over there five days a week, you're effectively just living there.

Honestly, that's an imposition because Justin agreed to have his current roommate as his one roommate. He didn't agree to have two roommates. Also, I'm not like sitting here with a copy of your lease OP, but I am 99.9% certain that you are in complete violation of your lease. Well, not you, but your boyfriend is. Pretty much every single landlord has some sort of claws in the contract that says that you can't just have

someone literally move into the house and live there five days out of the week. I mean, maybe you've got a really chill landlord who doesn't care or your contract doesn't specify that, but in pretty much every single apartment that I've ever rented, they have some sort of paragraph that says that people can come over and stay like a couple of nights per month. So, OP, if Justin decides to get the landlord involved, then there's a pretty good chance that your boyfriend will get evicted for violating the lease because I'm pretty sure he is violating the lease. OP, you really need to get a grip.

You're just not having sleepovers. You're living there. OP, I'm giving you two out of five buttholes. I will say that even though Justin is right, I have to give him like 0.5 out of five buttholes because the way that you described this story, it sounds like he was kind of like passive aggressive about it from the beginning, which is not really the best way to handle it. What he should have done once he started bothering him was to take his roommate aside and be like, hey look your girlfriend's overlaught, it's bothering me because of xyz, either address it or have your

girlfriend stop coming over so often. He shouldn't have argued with you because it's not really your position to fix, it's the boyfriends position to fix because he's the roommate, right? So for all the passive aggressive jerkiness, I'll give him like 0.5 out of 5 buttles. But make no mistake, Opie, you're the one in the wrong here. And don't get upset at your boyfriend for it. Oh, you're taking his side over mine. Girl, you're wrong wrong he should take his side over yours oh man this gets better I went into this girl's comments to see if she like made any reply in the post and someone asks can your boyfriend stay at your place sometimes and OP replies I can't since I live with two other girls who have a strict rule against having boyfriends over. OP! How do you not see the hypocrisy here? You can't have your boyfriend over because of your

roommates, but your boyfriend's roommate has to be okay with you being over literally five days a week and paying no rent, paying no utilities, not buying any groceries, like what? Get over yourself OP! That alone, just the sheer hypocrisy, the blindness to your own situation, is going to make me increase the butthole score from what did I say, two out of five? Yeah, you're getting upgraded to three out of five buttholes. Where can a vehicle from Mazda's electrified line up take you? From running errands. to running five kilometers from powering up to winding down.

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Am I the butthole for kissing my husband at a friends event? What? For kissing your husband? I don't even need to read this story OP. No, obviously you're not the butthole for kissing your husband in I don't even need to read this story OP. No, obviously you're not the blood hole for kissing your husband in pretty much any scenario. I guess if like someone is dying in front of you. And you decide to make out with your husband. But let's go ahead and read the story anyways. I'm a 37 year old woman and my husband is 42. We attended the annual barbecue last weekend of my friend Becky who's 36. Becky and I have

been close friends since college. I met my husband shortly after graduating and while him and Becky have never really been close, such as hanging out without me, they've always been friendly toward one another and we've all hang out together on numerous occasions. Becky recently lost her husband due to a medical issue and we've all been devastated. This year, Becky texted me the day before her event and told me that she was making this year's occasion a child-free one, and that meant that I couldn't bring my three-year-old, and she understood if I couldn't make it. I bit my tongue in an effort to be respectful,

and thanked her for letting me know, and I told her that, indeed, I wouldn't be able to make it. She responded by saying that she was looking forward to seeing my husband a dinner, though. I saw no issue with this and sinner her thumbs up. The next morning was the day of Becky's event and my mother-in-law luckily agreed to babysit our toddler. We thanked my mother-in-law and hid it over to Becky's with food, gifts, and no children in tow. As we walked in, Becky greeted my husband with a hug and then excited, hello, and in me with a sort of surprise look on her face. She didn't say much to me and she went into her living room with everybody else. I went to put down food on the counter while she introduced everybody to my husband and referred to him as dear. My husband told me about

this later on in the evening. I walked into the room, and she gave me no minds, and she was deep in conversation with a friend of hers. Sometime into the party, Becky and my husband were both standing at the patio door, and she had her arm around his waist. He spotted me and looked at me with a help me glare so I made my way over thinking she had one too many. I gave my husband a kiss as he separated from her grasp. Becky looked at the both of us and then back at the others at the party with a shocked expression and then ran back into the house crying. She ran into the bedroom and locked the door and screamed at me to leave through the door. I tried asking her what had upset her and why she wanted us to leave numerous times. She refused to answer

me and just kept crying. So we left and on the way out we received some pretty dirty looks from the other party goers. Later I received text from several mutual friends who scolded me for my public display of affection and how Becky was so upset that I made her party look tacky, and that I was rubbing in her face that she was a widow. I was so shocked and hurt to hear this, and I mentioned that every other couple at the event was also being relatively affectionate, and that despite my husband and I not being the only ones to commit pd a in public, I had given him a side hug and a pet kiss and that was all. Anyways, I'm a loss at what I should do. I feel like I heard a close friend, but I'm not sure how and what I can do to fix it.

Reddit, help! Am I the butthole? Opie, the way you tell this story, it sounds like your friend was straight up hitting on your husband. Either because she actually wanted to hit on him, or my guess is maybe she told other people that your husband was her boyfriend as some way to like, I don't know, save face and make other people think that she's like successful in the dating game. And then when you showed up unexpectedly, it kind of like ruined her plan, and when you kissed your husband, it definitely ruined the plan.

I know it's kind of a stretch. It's just that kind of makes sense given the situation. I don't know. It's a really weird situation, but overall, your friend definitely crossed a line by being all over your husband and you giving your husband a pet kiss and a side hug is not going too far. Sounds like the real problem is with your friend and not with you. I'm giving you zero out of five buttholes OP.

I'm giving your friend, I don't know, 1.5 out of five buttholes, and everyone else who criticized you went out of five buttholes. Am I the butthole for getting frustrated with my boyfriend for implying that I don't deserve to make the money that I make? I'm a 28 year old woman, and I got really lucky to get the job that I have right now. I study electrical and computer engineering in college and I job hopped four times. Each time I switch jobs, I negotiated really hard for pay and benefits. I'm making $160,000 now working remotely and living in a very low cost of living area. It's a really nice gig and I recognize I'm extremely lucky

to have interests that line up with a super well-paying industry, and super lucky to have been able to go to college at all. But, despite that, I feel like I did work to deserve it somewhat. College was super demanding and difficult, my first few jobs had grueling schedules, and I feel like I'm being paid more for the knowledge that I built over all that time. But still, I have to admit that it's pretty cushy. I never work over 40 hours a week, my co-workers never contact me about work outside of my 9-5. I get paid stupid good money for it, and I have two months vacation time.

So onto the conflict. My boyfriend used to work outside the home, he's an IT admin at a large company. But because of the pandemic, his job became partially remote. So we're working out of the same house. And I think he sees how different our jobs and pay are. He makes 65K a year and works a lot longer hours. He usually starts his day at 7 or 8 a.m. and works until 6 or 7 p.m. He often has to work on weekends to do IT stuff, and he's on call for emergencies with his personal phone. And it seems like they're having emergencies every week, so since we've

been working from home together, he makes comments about it occasionally, like, must be nice, kinds of things. Recently, he's gotten more frustrated with me though. Yesterday, I had a bad hit egg, so I told my boss that I was gonna be away from my desk for a while since I wasn't feeling well. I blocked out a two hour meeting on my calendar so people wouldn't try and reach me and took a nap. My boyfriend saw me napping during work and said, they're really paying you to sleep huh? I snapped at him saying that they were paying me for my skills and that I didn't care for the way that he had been talking about my job. He said something petty about my skills at napping and chilling on zoom and how that's definitely

worth six figures. And I got really irritated and said that just because he was underpaid doesn't mean that he could call me overpaid. And if he was mad, he should go take that up with his boss, not me. He said that I was being ridiculous and if he tried the stuff that I tried at his job, then he would be in huge trouble. I said, and maybe he needs to find a better job if his boss isn't ready to talk money. He called me privilege and out of touch and said that it isn't that easy to just go find a better job. I said, if you don't try, you're never going to know. He got irritated and stormed out. Am I the butthole for how I talked

to my boyfriend about work? Okay, OP, I was in a very similar situation before I became a YouTuber after I graduated college. So my girlfriend at the time studied electrical engineering and she got a very high-paying IT job right after graduating. And I, my job sucked. I was doing freelance ghost writing for blogs and stuff and my pay was awful I was making I think less than 50% of what my girlfriend was making. She was making big bucks

I was not and yeah There were definitely times that I was super envious of her job But did I take it out on her? No because I was happy for her I wanted her to be as successful as possible, to be as happy as possible. I wanted her job to be amazing with tons of benefits. Actually, they had this like special catering thing where they brought in food every single day and she didn't have to pay for lunch because the company just paid for her lunch. And yeah, I was invious of that. Who wouldn't be invious of that? But I'm not going to get angry at her

because she's living the good life. I want my girlfriend to be happy. So the healthy thing to do in that situation is to celebrate your girlfriend's successes but more in your own personal losses. And I was obviously unhappy about my current job because it didn't have many perks. It wasn't a good job.

It was a lot of work and not a lot of pay. And that sucks, but like I can be upset about my own job, but not take it out of my girlfriend. And that's the problem with your boyfriend, HeroP. If your boyfriend really loves you and cares about you, then he should be thrilled that you're able to take a two hour nap during your work day and it's not a big deal. I mean sure, if he wants to be in-beast of that, then he has every right to be, but that should be something that he's like, man, I wish I could take 2 hour naps, that sucks. What he shouldn't do is take it out on you and blame you for your ability to take advantage

of the perks of your job, that's just mean, petty, entitled, selfish. Your boyfriend's being a real jerk here OP. I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes, congrats on basically landing an amazing job. I'm giving your boyfriend 2 out of 5 buttholes, he needs to get his head out of his own ass. That was our slash of my the butthole, and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new reddit podcast episodes every single day.