rSlash - r/AmITheA**hole For Stealing My Son's Money to Buy a Car?

Episode Date: July 27, 2021

r/AmITheA**hole OP's brother is a 16 year-old young man who asks his parents to help him buy a car. It's a reasonable request -- after all, OP is 20-year-old woman and their parents helped buy her a car. They finally agree and OP's brother pools his money with his parents so they can go buy him a nice car. But instead of buying the brother a car, they buy themselves a new car -- using the brother's money! The brother is absolutely devastated and calls the parents out for their incredibly selfish behavior. Who do you think the butthole is here? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to R-Slash, a podcast where I read the best posts from across Reddit. Today's subreddit is R-Slash, am I the butthole where we get to judge strangers on the internet? I'm a 29 year old guy, and am I the butthole for inviting my 28 year old girlfriend on an expensive vacation and expecting her to pay all of her share? To be clear, I make a lot more than she does. Me, my girlfriend, my parents, my brother and his wife all went on vacation to another country a week ago. My brother and I did most of the planning, but we did ask everyone else for input. For background information, I make around $150,000 as an IT consultant. My girlfriend, a teacher, makes about $45,000. My parents are pretty affluent, so are my brother and sister-in-law.

My girlfriend knew this trip was coming and took on a second job waitressing on the weekends for several months to get ready for it. We've always split things 50-50 in the two years we've been together. There were a few times on the vacation when she didn't go to outings with us, she didn't go wine tasting, scuba diving, etc. She would also only eat two meals a day, simply saying that she was on a budget. My family does favor more high-end expensive places. My parents thought it was very strange that she only eats two meals a day, although she

normally eats three. When we got home, I asked her why she skipped out on several of the outings and only ate two meals a day. I mentioned how I heard her stomach growling one night, and I said that I was concerned about her having an eating disorder. She got teary eyed and said that she just couldn't afford three meals a day, nor the outings that she chose not to go on. She had only gone on three of the six outings with us.

She said that she wasn't expecting everything to cost so much, and she was overwhelmed. She also said that she doesn't know if our relationship is going to work out long-term, if she's expected to go on vacations like that with people who make so much more than her. I feel bad that I didn't pick up on her discomfort sooner, but we did agree to split everything 50-50 and I don't know why she agreed to come if cost was an issue. OP, why'd your girlfriend come on a family vacation? Because she wanted to. Why wouldn't she? You were going, you said your brother and his wife was going, so of course you would want to be included too. First of all, OP, don't get upset at your girlfriend for wanting to come because who wouldn't

want to go in that vacation? Secondly, OP, what's the point of making all that money if all you're going to do is just hoard it for yourself? You mean to tell me that you literally just ate a meal in front of your girlfriend and she just watched you eat and then after you guys ate and she watched you eat you're like oh so we're gonna go wine tasting are you gonna come and she's like um no I don't think so and you're just like oh I see. Well see ya wouldn't what a bee ya like come on O.B have some mercy on your girlfriends. What's the point of flying to some exotic vacation if you can't enjoy it with the person who theoretically you're in love with?

I get that on the surface, putting things 50-50 feels fair, but realistically the real way to split this would be 75-25. If she makes 50K and you make 150K, then together you're looking at a 200K year salary. So the actual fair thing to do would be for you to pay 75% of everything and she only spends 25%. That way you're each spending money relative to your own individual incomes. Honestly OP, you kind of sound like an out of touch douchebag. If I'm making $150,000 a year, and I find out that my girlfriend

is working two jobs to afford a vacation with my family, not her family with my family. Then I'd be like, oh, don't worry about it, sweetie. I'll cover the vacation this time. But instead, OP, you're just like, oh my God, who invited this poor girl? Is she even eating meals? Does she have an eating disorder? Oh my God, that's disgusting. Come on OP, get your head out of your butts. OP, I'm giving you three out of five buttholes. You're cold, unfair, and completely clueless. I'm giving your girlfriend zero out of five buttholes.

I'm the butthole for telling an employee that she can choose between either demotion or termination. I own a vape shop. We're a small business with only 12 employees. One of my employees, Peggy, was supposed to open yesterday. Peggy was recently promoted to manager after two solid years of good work as a cashier. I really thought that she could handle the responsibility. So I wake up, three hours after the place should be open,

and I have 22 notifications on the store Facebook page. Customers have been trying to come shop but the store is closed. Employees are showing up to work but they're also locked out. I call Peggy and get no response. I text her and get nothing. So I drive in to open the store. One hour before Peggy's shift was supposed to end, she calls me back. I ask her if she's okay and she says she needs to take a mental health day and do some self-care.

I'm still pretty pissed at this point, but I'm trying to be understanding because I know how important mental health days can be. So I ask her why she didn't call me, as soon as she knew that she needed the day off, and her response was, I didn't have nev spoon in my jaw for that. Frankly, I don't even know what that means. But it seems to me like she's saying that she can't be trusted to handle the responsibility of opening the store in the morning. So I told Peggy that she had two choices. One, go back to her old position with her old pay, or two, I fire her completely. She's calling me all sorts of words that end with the term, IST. She says that I'm discriminating against her due to her poor mental health and her gender. None of this would have been a problem. She simply took two minutes to call out.

I would have gotten up and opened the store on time myself, but this no-call no-show nonsense is not the way to run a successful business. I think that I might be the butthole here, because I am taking away her promotion over something that she really had no control over. But at the same time, she really could have called me. So, Reddit, I leave it to you. Am I the butthole? Okay, so let's just suppose that Peggy really is suffering from some kind of like mental health issue that doesn't allow her to always come in when she's supposed to. In that case, what she clearly should have done was set up some sort of protocol where whenever she has a date where she can't open and she can't call in because she doesn't

have enough spoons or whatever, then this protocol would automatically kick in and they could still open the store on time. Right? Maybe she's the manager who can open the store, but you have like an assistant manager who can also open the store that you always schedule on the same days that Peggy is supposed to be working. So no, she doesn't get to just say, oh, but what about my mental health? Because if she really wanted to take this problem seriously, then there are other solutions. No OP, you are not the blood hole here.

You've got to keep in mind that in addition to all the revenue that OP lost by not having the store open, OP also had to pay all of his employees that day. Those workers who showed up to work but couldn't get inside, yeah, OP has to pay that salary. So in addition to not making money, he's losing money to pay salaries that day. Anyways OP, I give you 0 out of 5 buttholes. I give Peggy 3 out of 5 buttholes. Am I the butthole for telling my stepdad and mom that they shouldn't be surprised

at what my little brother said to them when they pulled a prank on him? I'm a 20 year old woman and I'm the older sister to my little biological brother who's 17. He just finished high school last year. He says that I'm his best friend and he loves me more than anyone.

Of course, this is not true. He has many friends of his own. My brother's been asking our stepfather and mother if he could get a new car for his graduation. He said that he would pay 50-75% of the car with his own hard-earned money while they would have to pay the rest. They said no. I have my own car and I've been working so I can afford it, but my parents did help me pay it off.

Because of that, my brother argued with our parents for a while And they got kind of heated at one point I told my brother that I'd help him buy his car But he hugged me and said that I didn't need to worry and that he owed me more than I owed him my brother continued to press our parents All of last year until they gave in and said yes like they did for me I should point out that for the most part my brother has a negative relationship with our stepfather. Our biological mother and stepdad got together soon after our biological dad and mom got divorced when we were little. My brother thinks that our stepdad and mother were seeing each other before our real parents divorced and to be honest I think that might

be true. I'm not certain though. Anyway, my stepdad, mother and brother compromise, and they said they'd get him a car in 2021 so that people don't gawk at him during the graduation party. In June of this year, my brother and parents are still arguing about the car. Except now their arguments are getting louder, and they last hours into the evening. My stepdad was getting into screaming matches with my brother over it, but finally they reached a compromise and they bought him a car last week. The faded morning comes, and my brother wigs up to our stepdad and mom guiding him outside to a car.

But not his car, our mother's car. My stepdad used his and my brother's money on a dumb prank, bought a completely different model of car, and said it was for our mother. Our mom and stepdad just laughed and kissed each other. My brother didn't lose it. He didn't even look angry. He just looked dead in our stepdad's eyes and I'm not joking he said verbatim. You might think I'm effing stupid.

You might think whatever. But I'm just better than you bro. You know that. I know that. And our mom is an effing idiot for saying with a prick like you But I'll make you wish that you'd never effing met us. I promise you you might be laughing now But you'll be crying later. He then walked off not even looking back at them as they stared horrified My parents asked me what that was about, and I, feeling terrible for

my brothers, said they had it coming and they shouldn't be surprised. So now they grounded both of us. I've had to explain the situation to my friends because I can't see them anymore, but I feel so bad for my baby brother. My friends backed me up on this and they tell me to comfort my little brother as much as possible. But even then, my parents are so mad and they tell me to comfort my little brother as much as possible. But even then, my parents are so mad and they can't see that my brother has had his heart crushed. Am I the butthole? All right, okay. What your stepdad did here?

Isn't just morally wrong, it is literally illegal. You can't just say, hey, give me money so I can go buy this thing and then not buy that thing by something else instead and buy it for someone else. What is that? Is that fraud? It's fraud, right? I think it's fraud. Like actual legal, you have to go to prison or something fraud. I mean granted, they probably wouldn't go to jail because this is like probably a small amount of money, but yeah, it's illegal. You can take them to court. You can sue them and you will win easily easily you will win because what they did is hyper legal Okay, so I just ordered this like custom kind of like

keyboard riser from my desk because I want my keyboard to be higher and It's basically just as like little wooden box and I'm gonna put on my desk And it's like a certain height so it had to be custom made from Etsy and I sent some guy on Etsy like 50 bucks to make a nice wooden keyboard riser for me that dude can't just be like oh by the way to be custom made from Etsy, and I sent some guy on Etsy like 50 bucks to make a nice wooden keyboard riser for me. That dude can't just be like, oh by the way, I took your 50 dollars and I spent it on tacos for me and my girlfriend, sorry bro, because I'm not gonna get you that keyboard riser anymore, like it doesn't work that way man, it's illegal. It's fraud, I think it's fraud right? If it's fraud let me know down in the comments because if it's not fraud then it's definitely some

other crime that I don't know the name of. Anyway, so what your parents did here was illegal, yes, and also unethical. They are major buttholes. I'm giving both of your parents 4.5 out of 5 buttholes because they literally stole from their child and then laughed in his face about it. OP, you and your brother both get 0 out of five buttolls because you did absolutely nothing wrong here. Also, this reminds me of a story from my childhood. Back when I was pretty young,

I might have been probably like eight, nine, 10, somewhere in that ballpark. It was an age where I had just started cursing and I hadn't cursed around my parents and it was like a big deal that I said. Kiki-kiki. Kiki-kiki. Like, you know, just that age.

Anyways, me and my little brother convinced our parents to let us set up a tent in our yard and we were gonna sleep in the tent overnight. Well, my parents get the bright idea that they're gonna prank us. So what they do is they approach the tent at night, at like midnight by the time we're actually asleep, and they kind of like paw at the tent, pretending to be some sort of wild animal, and this terrifies my brother and I.

Because we're like eight and six, something like that. And I shout out, what the f*** is that? Because I'm a scared little kid. My parents later got mad at me for cursing, because that was the first time they'd ever heard me curse when they were the ones who were scaring me. So major butthole move, mom and dad. It's not my fault you made me curse. Giving my mom and dad one out of five buttholes because I still love them, they're good parents, but that was

kind of a douche-move. Am I the butthole for only going to black salons? I'm a 30-year-old white woman with thick curly brown hair. I'm a 3C if you know what that means. I've always struggled with my hair, and I was adopted into a family of people with straight hair who couldn't care for my hair and I was adopted into a family of people with straight hair who couldn't care for my hair properly, leading to huge knots. And I would regularly get my hair massacred by scissors to make it short to be easier to deal with. When I went to university I met my best friend, who's black, and she has a similar hair type to me. When she noticed me struggling with my hair, she helped me out. She showed me hair products from brands intended for black people that really helped with my hair quality. And she even took me to the salon that she went to that catered to black hair types. My hair has been amazing ever since then. They've been the only

people to understand how to care for my hair and make it look nice. While onto the actual arguments. Me and some friends from work went out to dinner. We were talking about our hair and I commented that I only go to a salon that specializes in black hair care. One of my co-workers, who's also white, commented that it was inappropriate for me as a white woman to take advantage of black products and services that should only be used by black people. When I asked why, she said that it's kind of cultural appropriation.

My other co-workers agreed with her, and I felt uncomfortable ever since. I don't know if she's right and if I'm in the wrong. I don't even know what I would do if I was in the wrong because I don't want to go back to the salons that butchered my hair before. Alright, so let's make one thing clear. Taking your own hard earned money and spending it at black-owned businesses isn't a bad thing if anything it helps those businesses. Do you really think that most Black owned businesses only went Black people to buy their products and services? Of course not. I would have to imagine that for a lot of business owners they would want as many different people to come as possible because it just means more money. How on Earth is

supporting Black businesses and Black communities a bad thing? Also on top of that, why does your co-worker think that these black people need her to speak for them? OP, you've been going to all these black salons. If any of them had a problem with it, then they could have told you that themselves. They don't need some white savior to come in and say, oh well, actually what you're doing is extremely rude. Also, I'm going

to be honest with you, even if I'm wrong here, even if what OP is doing is considered to be cultural appropriation, then I will fight to the death for OP and everyone else's right to culturally appropriate as much as they want to, because I will be damned if I will ever give up the Mexican Burrito. We've got this Burrito place that's close to my house and they make the best burrito I have ever had in my entire life a little bit of sour cream. Oh my god. So with buying black hair products and eating burritos counts as cultural appropriation then yeah I'm a cultural appropriator because burritos are delicious. That was our slash of my the butthole and if you like this content be sure to follow my

podcast because I've put on your reddit podcast episodes every single day. and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I've put on your Reddit podcast episodes every single day.