rSlash - r/AmITheA**hole My Parents Made Bets on When I'd Lose My Virginity

Episode Date: January 11, 2021

r/AmITheA**hole In today's episode, OP has a confrontation with her bizarre parents. For some reason, her parents are absolutely obsessed with her love life and are terrified that she will become "easy" in college. They call her terribly sexist names, and they even make bets with other members of the family about when she will lose her virginity. OP is pretty sure that her parents are wrong here, but her whole family is against her in this. Is OP the butthole? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Childhood vaccines have been around for decades and are safe and proven to help protect children against 14 preventable diseases. Learn more at Canada.ca slash childhood vaccines. A message from the government of Canada. Welcome to our slash, a podcast where I read the best posts from across Reddit. Today's sub-radi is our slash in my the butthole, where parents make bets about how much of a slut their daughter is going to be. Am I the butthole, where parents make bets about how much of a slut their daughter is gonna be. Am I the butthole for not allowing my grandmother around my baby because of something she lied about when I was 15?

I'm a 28 year old female, I'm married with three kids, four year old twin boys and a three month old girl. My grandmother is a 71 year old woman. Back when I was 15, my mom had a set of twins, a boy and a girl. She was put on bed rest because the C section had gone wrong and she lost a lot of blood. My mom needed help and I went to school full time, so she invited my grandmother into our home and charged no rent to help her out. At some point or another, my mom had threatened to kick her out because every morning my mom would check on the twins to find my brother missing. My grandmother, who's

extremely overweight, had been taking my brother from his crib and was sleeping with him on her chest on the couch. My mom told her multiple times to stop, and she refused, so mom threatened to kick her out. My grandmother's way of retaliating was to tell my mother, who had extreme postpartum depression. That my two-month-old sister rolled off the bed and fell into the tile floors. This never happened. This obviously caused extreme panic from my mom, which made her spiral because she was already suffering from the postpartum depression. Because of this, I don't want my grandmother anywhere near my baby.

I lived at a state when my twins were born, so she didn't see them until they were two years old and she was never allowed around them alone. However, now that I live in this state and have a baby, she's been harping on me to let her meet my daughter. I kept telling her no, but I gave her no reason until last night. I reminded her that I witnessed her causing my mom unnecessary panic, and I wouldn't be allowing her near my kid because I'm not going to chance her doing the same thing with me. My grandmother lost it, and really tried saying that that scenario never happened, and that we made it all up to make her look bad.

A lot of the families also sided with her. She told everyone. And they say that I need to let things go and stop living in the past. I've been told that I'm alienating my grandmother and that I'm going to destroy her by not letting her build a bond with my child. Am I the butthole? First off, that bit about her being destroyed by not being able to build a bond with her child is absolute BS. She never met the kid for the first two years of

her life and she did just fine. Outside of that OP, I see no problem with this. You get zero out of five buttholes. Your baby, your rules. Your grandmother gets two out of five buttholes. Am I the butthole for buying my friend's childhood home? I've got a friend, Kay, that I've known since we were 5 and were now in our mid-30s. We used to be close, but after university he moved to the United States for work, so we would only talk occasionally. In fact, I see his parents more often than I see him, because pre-pandemic his dad would get the same train as me into London, and sometimes we'd set together. Anyway, me and my wife have a kid and would like one more at least, so we're looking to

buy a house. We currently live in a two-bit room flat and it's getting small. We were looking at listings online when I came across my fringe childhood home. Turns out, his parents were looking to downsize and they were selling their house. Honestly, it was perfect for us.

Five bedrooms, garden space, close to the station. They'd even had a special line laid into their house for super high speed internet. Something like 5-10 get bib-oops down. Seeing this, I phoned up my friend's dad and asked him about the house. He was very open to the idea of selling to me, and even so that he was glad that it was staying in with the family. Our families are also really close. We dealt with each other directly, without an estate agent, and therefore he was able

to give me a nice discount. All that was in October, but my friend Kay has been live it ever since. He kept saying how I bought his childhood and how I was taking advantage of his parents by having paid them less. His sister on the other hand was happy for me, and in lieu of a housewarming party, she sent my family a frame picture of our two families from when we were about ten or so. While I didn't do anything wrong, legally, I feel I may have stepped on case toes by now living in a place where he grew up. Not the butthole OP, I'm giving you zero out of five buttholes. That being said, if I was thinking about buying the childhood home of one of my close friends, I would at least ask them if they're okay

with it first. And if they said no, I would just move on, because personally, I value friendships more than I value a new home. However, if it was some guy that I lost contact with and I hadn't spoken to in years, then, yeah, screw him. Am I the butthole for not making it known that I understand Spanish to my girlfriend's family when they talked about me? I'm a 24-year-old male, and I'm not Hispanic or anything. I'm white and was adopted by my parents when I was 5.

My mom is Mexican, so I learned Spanish from her. I'm pretty fluent and I guess that surprises people sometimes because I don't look the part. I'm white, blonde hair, blue eyes, etc. Anyways, I've been with my girlfriend for a while who's his spanic. I've never mentioned that I'm bilingual because the topic was just never brought up. A month ago, her family went into meets since we recently moved in together. We did it through Zoom. It was her parents, her grandma, and her sister. Everyone was welcoming and nice. Her grandma was the first to say something in Spanish, and her words surprised me because she was literally so nice talking to me, then suddenly switched to saying something else.

Porqueo Troguero, which basically translates to, why another white boy? Then she asked when she can set her up with one of her friend's nephews. My girlfriend told her to stop, then her parents did the same. A couple of times during the conversation, they switched to Spanish whenever making a comment about me. My girlfriend, at least, always shut down their criticisms and told them to stop talking like that. To be honest, I didn't say anything because I was curious what their real thoughts on me were. It kind of sucked that they were so freely talking about me right to my face. I finally said something when her mom mentioned my girlfriend told her I was in college and asked what I'm studying. Her dad commented to her grandma in Spanish.

Uh, no wonder he moved in with her if he's wasting all his money in school. See, the fact that he moved in together seems to be their hang-up with me. They are not happy that we moved in with each other and think that because she works full-time and I work part-time, that we did it so I can mow off of her. But that's not even true because we split the bills for everything. So, I answered in Spanish. We moved in together because we wanted to take the next step in our relationship and we love each other. Then, I answered her mom's question and added that I have several scholarships to pay for everything, so what I earned goes to living expenses. They all looked panicked and right away apologized a million times for what they said.

My girlfriend was shocked too, but she didn't have an issue with what I did and thought the looks on their faces were hilarious. She only felt bad that I did know what they were saying all along and apologized. Her sister is telling us that what I did was petty and mean because I embarrassed them. That I should have said I knew Spanish because that was a conversation I wasn't meant to understand or be a part of. Therefore, it wasn't my business to listen in. It's like I was Eve's dropping on them. I get that Eve's dropping is bad and they wouldn't have said anything if they knew I understood, so I guess I can see where she's coming from. Was I the butthole for not saying anything? So she thinks that you don't have a right to know

what's being said during a Zoom call that you're a part of. When you yourself are the subject of that Zoom call. No, that's just stupid BS logic. They did something wrong, they got caught, and now they're trying to flip it back on you because they're embarrassed about it. Hearing what someone says when they're talking about you and looking at you in the eye isn't called eavesdropping. That's just called listening. Also, I'll be honest, it's pretty stupid to assume that American guy doesn't know any Spanish. Sure, admittedly most Americans don't know Spanish, but I think most Americans know a couple of words.

So, even if you can't understand a full sentence, you can typically pick up a couple of words and figure out the context. OP, you get zero out of five buttholes and your girlfriend's family gets two out of five buttholes. I'll also give your girlfriend zero out of five buttholes for defending you. This NBA season make every three-pointer alley-oop and buzzer-beater even more exciting with

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I'm currently outside on our terrace while my family is gathered in the living room after having asked me to step outside for a bit, because apparently I've ruined the mood. I'm turning to you guys to ask if I'm the butthole for what I just did. My family from all over the city has gathered to celebrate the New Year's. COVID cases are thankfully low in my city and we've taken the necessary precautions. As this typical of Asian family reunions, the old people in the family love to check up on their nieces and nephews. One of my aunts, A, loves to show off her kids achievements, particularly her daughter Pat. While listing off her her kids achievements, particularly her daughter

Pat. While listing off her daughter's achievements, passing the bar and recently getting married to a fellow lawyer, my aunt turned to me and asked what I have achieved in 2020. She began to list off all of my lack of achievements, like how I'm 30 and still unmarried. I'm a dude if that matters. About how I'm still living at home with my parents and how I'm still driving my sucky 2000 something civic. My other cousin is joined in on the jeering and listed all the other failed aspects of my

life. Now I graduated with a degree in architecture, but after multiple attempts, I just can't seem to pass the exam. This has been a point of contention in the family because my other cousins are lawyers, teachers, etc. These days, I basically work freelance from home. I don't know why, but my aunt's condescending voice got to me and I said, I made my first million this year, has Pat made her first million yet? Then I turn to my cousins and I ask the same, have you guys made your first million yet? Because I have.

The room fell silent. I basically killed the mood. My dad asked me to go outside and relax because apparently I might have just ruined everyone's new year celebration. Was I the butthole? Nah, OP, down in the comments, the mirrors true sums it up.

Not the butthole. Why does everyone get to dump on you without you depending yourself? That should have ruined the nights for your parents, them dumping on you like this. And then hello friends ads. It's all fun and games when they attack without reprisal, but the moment you hit them back with their own medicine, silence. Opie, I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes.

I'm giving your cousins an on 2 out of 5 buttholes. Also, congrats on your first million. They say the first million is the hardest, so million number two should be right around the corner. Am I the Butthole for giving my family the silent treatment over their slut bet? I'm a freshman in college, and before college, I was homeschooled basically my whole life. Because of that, I have pretty bad social anxiety. Regardless of that, I was really excited to go to college and finally have my freedom. My parents really didn't want me to go in through a huge fit about it, since they think I only want to go to sleep around and drink.

Every time I spoke to them while I was away, they would try to get me to come back home, so I stopped answering their calls as often, which really pissed my mom off. I went from talking to my parents multiple times a day to around once a week, though I would still speak with my siblings. They were literally obsessed with the idea of me leaving their home and becoming a whore, which was odd because they'd never been like that before. They had this idea that I'm a good girl gone wild, but they used to let me have co-ed sleepovers and hang out with guys whenever I wanted. Anyways, I was talking to my 15-year-old sister and she told me about this bet that my family had made.

I guess in retaliation for me not answering their calls, they were betting if I'd become a slut in college. They were speculating on when I'd lose my virginity, how many guys I'd sleep with, if I'd sleep with a girl, etc. She sent me a few screenshots, and it seemed almost like a big passive-aggressive joke. It wasn't just my parents in it, it had my siblings, cousins, and aunts. While they were seemingly kidding, I felt extremely embarrassed. I didn't know how to bring it up because I didn't want my sister to get in trouble for showing it to me, so it went on for quite a while. I finally texted my mom about it, asked her if she would please leave the chat or at

least add me to it so it wasn't just my family talking and clowning about me behind my back. I didn't mention that it was my sister who would join it to me. My mother insisted that they weren't talking about me and that I was being a prima donna even though I literally have evidence. Since it was obviously they weren't going to delete it, I told my mom that I wasn't going home for Christmas and I wasn't going to come visit after her surgery. Partially out of anger and because of embarrassment. Christmas is my mom's favorite holiday and she always goes all out for it. She wanted me to be your caretaker after the surgery, since after Christmas money will

be tied and she didn't want to pay for a professional. She says that I'm abandoning her and I think that she stabbed me in the back. Am I the butthole? No, OP. Your parents alienated you and now you're alienated. What were they expecting? Just tell your parents you can't make it because you have an orgy schedule for that day. OP, I'm giving you zero out of five buttholes and I'm giving your parents three out of five buttholes. It might the butthole for expecting my boyfriend to replace all my socks, the exact same ones as I

had before. This might seem silly. I'm a 24 year old woman and I like wearing cheerful socks since my uniform is all white. I'm currently working as a flabotomist and it usually tears up the patients too. I've spent a few years collecting strange socks, ones with sushi, pizza, corgi, cat, knit cage, etc. I think I had about 30 pairs. My 29 year old boyfriend has always hated them and thinks they're childish. So, I agreed to only wear them to work and never on dates are around his friends or family. I thought that was fair. On Boxing Day his parents came over for coffee and gifts. I accidentally put on a pair of childish socks and his mother made a comment about it. I explained that I wear them at work

to cheer people up and she liked that. My boyfriend didn't. The next day, all of my socks were gone, and the drawer was filled with plain black socks. I asked my boyfriend and he told me to do it through them away and purchase some more appropriate socks so that I wouldn't embarrass him in front of his parents again. I told him that's insane, they were mine and he had no right to throw them away. Not to mention that I spent quite some time collecting them. So I made a list of the ones I remembered I had and told him I expect the same ones as a replacement.

He told me that's completely unreasonable and then it would take a lot of time, effort and money for him to find those specific pairs. I haven't changed my mind yet, they cost me a lot of time and effort to find too. I think he's being controlling, he thinks I'm being unreasonable and demanding. Am I the butthole? I think I might be a butthole for asking for the exact same pairs. I know that'll take him a lot of effort to find. Opie, this is super easy to figure out.

Take something that your boyfriend loves and throw it away and say it was just childish. Your boyfriend will freak out of course because why wouldn't he? You can't just throw away someone else's property and expect to get away with it scot-free. Your boyfriend sounds like a major douchebag, I'm giving him 3 out of 5 buttholes and I'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes. That was our slash of my The Butthole and if you liked this content check out my Patreon where I publish extra episodes. Also be sure to follow my podcast because I put on new Reddit podcast episodes every

single day. this content, check out my Patreon where I publish extra episodes. Also, be sure to follow my podcast because I put on new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.