rSlash - r/Amithedevil I Can't Wait to Be a Homewrecker!

Episode Date: November 14, 2024

0:00 Intro 0:10 Marks on throat 3:47 Privilege 6:44 Comment 7:27 Cheater 9:23 Comment 9:33 Marriage 12:14 Pranked 14:55 Pencil fees Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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sports action ready for another season of gridiron glory. What are you waiting for? Get off the bench into the huddle and head for the end zone all season long. Visit bet MGM dot com for terms and conditions must be 19 years of age or older. Ontario only. Please Welcome to r slash MI the Devil where a guy attempts to murder his wife and then seeks sympathy on the internet. Our next reddit post comes from LegalAdviceUK.

I got married on Thursday and an annulment was demanded on Friday. We also have a child. I'm a guy and I got married roughly 48 hours ago. I've been with my wife for 7 years, lived together for 6. We live in her house. I pay rent to help with the mortgage and apart from a break during covid, I've been with my wife for seven years, lived together for six. We live in her house. I pay rent to help with the mortgage and apart from a break during covid, I've paid it since I moved in. Not always on time, but consistently.

The bills are split and some are in my name. We have a three-year-old daughter. I am on the birth certificate. She means the world to me and I love seeing her. We planned a church blessing and a reception for family and friends on Friday night. In the early hours of Friday, we had a fight. I have some bruises on my arm and she has some marks on her throat. I got kicked out and ended up camping out in a hotel room that friends had booked for

the wedding. My mom collected some clothes for me yesterday. Not enough for a week, but I can deal with that if I'm able to arrange with friends to sofa surf. My wife contacted the cops, who are apparently looking for me, although they haven't been in contact and presumably have my phone number. My wife is planning to stay with family in another town for a week with our daughter. She won't allow me on the property.

And she won't let me see our daughter. She won't allow me on the property and she won't let me see our daughter. Usually, when they go away or I'm working away, we talk on WhatsApp video, but she says that she doesn't want to unblock my number. I've suggested Teams instead, but my mom says that my wife doesn't want that either. My wife also apparently said that she will only allow me to see our daughter at a contact center, which is a horrible idea. I would happily pick her up from the nursery and drop her off and also put her to bed on nights that my wife runs her guides groups.

My wife wants an annulment and apparently wants me to pay for it. She's also put on Facebook that I'm abusive, which I feel is hurtful and doesn't help cool things down and also isn't true. Yo what? I'm convinced that I need medical care because my heart rate is sky high and I have a serious headache. I can deal with this today, but I was suicidal yesterday. My friends and parents talked me down. I've barely slept. I've barely eaten. It goes without saying that I'm desperately sorry. Alright, took him only like what, seven paragraphs to get here? I'm not entirely to blame

here. There's a backstory and that I'll move between heaven and earth to sort things out. My wife will only communicate via my mother. This puts my mom in a difficult position and when she goes home she won't be available to pick things up for me or whatever. Plus, my mom seems to have taken my wife's side, which means she might not convey my messages. So what are my rights here? Whoa, what are your rights? You have a right to remain silent.

Anything you say can and will be used against you in the court of law. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be provided to you. You douchebag! You almost murdered your wife! And you're acting like you're the victim here? That is the most unbelievable cop-out sentence I've ever heard. She has some marks on her throat. Yeah, from what? From you choking her? From you trying to strangle her? You know, the poor wife probably literally thought, oh my god, I'm going to die. He's going to strangle me and then I'll be dead. Unbelievable. And then this guy gets online and tries to throw a pity party. Oh boo hoo. I think I need to go see a doctor because I'm so so sad you guys.

You know, when you go to prison, I think they give you free medical care, OP. So at least you got that going for ya. Our next reddit post comes from r slash amithabudhole. Am I the butthole for calling my friend privileged after she helped me? Me and my friend are both 35 year old women. We're high school friends and we still live in the same city together. She's a software engineer and I'm a nursing attendant. The benefits that she gets are insane!

Work flexibility, unlimited pay time off, work from home, etc. And that's only the stuff that I know about. There could be others. Not to mention, even though I don't know her salary, it is much higher than mine. Even compared to nurses, which also requires a bachelor's degree, her benefits are much better. I often feel jealous and mad at myself for not pursuing education and getting a cushy job that doesn't involve bodily fluids. I know that I'm not good with computers,

so what she does isn't an option, but my job involves shift work, verbal abuse, and constant drama from my coworkers. My daycare ends at 6pm sharp and I was basically commanded into staying at 7 o'clock due to staffing shortages. I didn't want to and when I called the daycare they said that I had to pay $75 for a member of staff to stay for another hour and a half. My husband and in-laws couldn't pick up my child so I was panicked. I make less than $40 for that extra hour of work so it wasn't worth it. I remembered that my friend isn't that far hour of work so it wasn't worth it. I remembered that my friend isn't that far from the daycare so I asked her if she could pick up my son.

She said sure and picked him up and took him to her house until I could get there. I picked him up and she already had dinner ready and she asked me to join them and I felt weird refusing so I stayed. Afterwards we sat on the couch a bit and she was still working and brought her laptop to join me. I asked her why she was working so late and she laughed and admitted that she got a massage mid-day so she wants to make up the work. I was shocked and asked her how her work could allow that and she said they don't care as long as the work is done. I told her that she is insanely privileged and she got annoyed and told me that it was

part of her work benefits and her boss goes on a bike ride every day. So it's an expected thing to be able to do when working from home. I said sure it is for her but the rest of us would never even dream of something like that. She shrugged and said there were downsides to her work too and I admit I was kinda pissed that she can't admit her privilege and I said that it's nothing compared to healthcare and she got mad and told me that if I didn't like it I should just leave and not complain about how privileged she is.

I left after that and she hasn't responded to our weekly morning walks so I'm wondering if she's still mad. I think she's dismissive and thinks that leaving my job is so easy without more education or skills, but I know that neither of us are privileged in the traditional sense as neither of us are white or rich so she probably doesn't feel like she's privileged. Love this top comment from Asher the Frost. Imagine this from the friend's perspective. You get a call from your friend asking you to pick up her son from daycare and look after him. So you stop working, head over, grab the wee one and watch him. Even making sure that when his mom comes by there's dinner ready for her to enjoy since you

know she had a hard day. You bring your laptop to the couch since between babysitting and cooking, you didn't have time to finish your work for that day. And because you didn't want to make your friend feel guilty for asking for help, when asked, you completely gloss over that you would have already finished it if you weren't babysitting. In response, you get name-called and expected to apologize for being able and willing to help. Our next Reddit post comes from r slash off my chest. I had a fling with my friend's husband before they met and he stopped meeting up with me after they went on their first date.

He was upfront with my friend about us and she initially ended things with him but ended up giving him a chance and they've been together ever since then. Now, almost eight years later, she basically has a dream life. She has a good looking and in shape husband, who's a really good husband and father, who works a high level job and makes a lot of money. And he loves her unconditionally and spoils her in every way possible and has literally saved her life at one point. She stays at home and looks after their two kids and she's pregnant

with their third. It's really easy to see that she's absolutely in love with him. Like even if we're at her place having a coffee and just catching up and he gets home, she'll make a beeline straight for him just to give him a hug and a kiss. A little while ago, my friend hosted a small girls movie night at her place with some friends and the whole evening, her husband looked after their kids the whole evening and put them to bed without disturbing us even once. I had to take a phone call at one point and I went into another room and looked out the window and he was sitting beside their pool shirtless, reading a book and smoking from a hookah pipe.

It's probably one of the hottest things I've ever seen, and the first time I saw all of his tattoos. Ever since, I haven't been able to stop thinking about him. I've been thinking about how he used to hook up before he met my friend, and I want him so badly. I don't want an affair, I want my friend's life fully. I want her husband. Hell, I'll even adopt their kids and raise them as my own.

I know that it'd be destroying a marriage and a family and probably all my friendships, but I don't care. It would be worth it in my eyes. It sucks to say, but it's the truth and there's nothing I can do about it. It's so hard feeling like this. I like this top comment from OkCarpet to quote a wise person from the internet. Delulu is not the salulu. Our next reddit post is from r slash relationship advice.

After 12 years, my marriage is nearing its end. My husband is no longer who I want to be with. We stay together because of the kids, but both of us know that it's not sustainable. The fire went out a long time ago. Also, I've changed and know better what I want from a relationship. A few years ago, I met someone at work that I fell for pretty quickly. He's exactly what I'm searching for in a man and he feels like a soulmate. Never before have I met someone that can finish my thoughts the way that he does, share the

same passions and just gets me entirely? The problem is, he's married and appears to be happily married even. What I don't understand is how he can give me so much attention even after work. We do talk about work most of the time, but sometimes this is hours per day, even on the weekends and the conversation sometimes hits more personal subjects. Some time ago, I started flirting with him, touching his arms, sitting very close to him, and giving hints in my messages. He always completely ignored them, but never tried to stop me or backed off when I touched him. He did sometimes talk about his wife and kids though, and said how happy he was with them. Also, I've seen messages appear on

Instagram where he mentions romantic things about his wife. They appear to be very close in public too, often hugging each other, etc. And his wife and kids look completely in love with him. I'm very happy for him, but it still pains me to see this. Because I know that he's the one that I want. We're perfect for each other and he would be great to my kids as well. The thing that gives me hope is that he continues to spend all this time with me. He treats me like his best friend, but I can sense he wants more. Although that one time that I was less subtle and told him I wanted to be with him in every single way, he wrote to me that he thinks that I'm amazing but that we should focus

on our families. After that, he distanced himself for some time, but he's slowly approaching again. Still no flirtation coming out of his direction, but it does mean something, doesn't it? Should I wait for him to be direct and speak to his heart or should I encourage him a bit more to do so? I can feel he craves me as much as I do for him. This is hurting me and him as well, probably. I'm not sure his wife knows about this, as my husband does, but I can't imagine she thinks our chatting frequencies are normal. What to do? Seek therapy. Not only are you trying to destroy your marriage, but also another person's marriage, and you're just completely delusional.

He effectively dumped you. He's like, nah, no thanks. I love my wife. And you're like, ah, he loves me clearly. Our next Reddit post comes from r slash amithabuthole. Am I the butthole for pranking a colleague? I think she's overreacting. I've been at my current job for about seven months now.

I didn't meet this coworker Jill until about four months ago because she was out on maternity leave. I've never at the job for about seven months now. I didn't meet this coworker, Jill, until about four months ago because she was out on maternity leave. I've never really liked her. She talks a lot and is always asking personal questions. I think she likes me, but she's married with a kid, so it's a hard no from me. She finally got the hint about two months ago and has left me alone besides work duties, which she still nags about, but whatever. The office apparently has a tradition of doing fun pranks during October for Halloween. Like wrapping a cubicle in plastic wrap, hiding candy in odd places,

a plastic skeleton that gets moved around each day. Just funny harmless stuff like that. I decided to prank Jill. I got a bunch of those fake spider webs and some plastic spiders. I got one of those large spiders with repositionable legs to put in her chair and make it look like it's working. I got in early today to get it all set up before anyone else came in. Then I went to the break room to hang out until start time. So she finally comes in and I can hear this scream from all the way in the break room. I go over to see her reaction, except she's not there anymore and two of our colleagues are taking down the webs and spiders from her cubicle.

They demand to know if I'm the one who put it up, then start yelling at me once I say that I did. They tell me that it was rude and uncalled for because Jill has arachnophobia and had to be taken to the bathroom to calm down. Okay, but how was I supposed to know that she was scared of spiders? Plus, it's just plastic spiders, nothing to cry over. I told them that I had apologized to Jill to get them to calm down

and help them clean the rest of it up. I didn't see Jill again until lunch, which is weird because her cubicle is next to mine. I caught her in the break room and apologized for scaring her with my prank. And she sort of just shrugged my apology off which ticked me off. This is where I might have been the butthole. I told her to grow a pair and not be so sensitive next time a spider came her way.

She just gave me this weird look and told me that she has and she wouldn't recommend it. Like, what's that supposed to mean? Anyway, I tried to go back to my lunch, but my boss called me into the office and suggested I take the rest of the day off. Guys, she went to HR over this silly, stupid prank. Yeah, the prank itself isn't so bad. I mean, you didn't really know, so you can't take too much blame for that. The clear problem here is that you've got this really nasty attitude where you think that you're right and everyone else is wrong and you're clearly just a butthole.

So I'm guessing this story is actually worse than you're making it out to be because I don't really believe you, OP. I kind of think you're a liar. Our next Reddit post is from r slash am I the butthole? I'm a 19 year old woman and I'm currently a sophomore university student who's taking a basic art course for a GPA boost. I'm about one month into the course and things have been going smoothly for the most part. On the second day of class, I forgot my pencil case

and had no drawing utensils. Obviously, this is problematic for an art class. I asked my seat neighbor, Danielle, to lend me a pencil. The pencil that she lent me was one of those nice mechanical pencils. I looked up the brand online and they go for about $21. I used the pencil for the class period but decided to hold on to it because I might need it in other classes. I was in a rush so I stuffed my pencil in my tote bag. To make a long story short, I ended up losing the pencil. When I told Danielle this, she insisted that I pay her $5 a month until the pencil was

returned. I agreed to pacify her and because I knew that she could not be serious. Last Friday, she requested my first installment. I told her I would not be paying for a pencil and that she was making a big deal since she had two more of the exact same pencil. She claims that I have no respect for other people's property and that I'm a jerk. She's also been discussing the matter with mutual friends and making things awkward. I'm starting to feel like I'm the crazy one here. Am I the butthole for not paying rental fees for a pencil? Down in the comments, people are talking about the pencil and clearly this is not just a standard run-of-the-mill pencil. This is a very specific type of art pencil that

legitimately does go for like 23 bucks because yeah, unfortunately a lot of art supplies are expensive. So pay up OP! That was r slash am I the devil and if you like this content be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new reddit podcast episodes every single day.