rSlash - r/Amithedevil I Cheated, then my Ex RUINED My Life!

Episode Date: August 29, 2024

0:00 Intro 0:12 Cheater 5:44 Child support 6:38 Affair and child 8:43 Tough past Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

the game. Welcome to r slash am i the devil where an ex-girlfriend patiently waits for a year to systematically destroy her ex-boyfriend's life. Our next reddit post comes from r slash true off my chest. Last year I cheated on my ex-girlfriend of 8 years, Annie, with a colleague, Jess, whom I now have a 3 week old son with. I have no excuse. It cost me my job and the majority of my friendships, along with the love of a good woman. I deserved it all and I've never expected any sympathy for my actions.

Annie delivered my stuff to my parents house before I even knew that she knew about the cheating. She didn't even confront me, she just cut me out of her life without a word. I messaged everyone we knew, begging them to ask her to talk to me. And I sent hundreds of messages telling her how much I regretted everything and that I wanted her back. I never got a response. Jess saw the messages and it obviously caused issues between us in the beginning. But she became pregnant quickly so we moved past it for the sake of our family together, which we both wanted. I'm 100% committed to Jess and I haven't even looked at another woman since things settled down. In the final stretch of Jess's pregnancy,

about a month ago, I saw Annie in a shop for the first time since the breakup. She was pretty cold towards me, but said that a few months ago, she found a keychain my granddad got me when I was very young. It's not valuable, but she knows that it means a lot to me, and she said that I could come collect it on the following Saturday morning. I explained that was six days after Jess was due to give birth, so I'd probably need to be home. But she just said that I could either get it on Saturday or it was going in the bin.

So I agreed on a time to come over. My son was born a few days late, but he's perfectly healthy and wonderful, so he was less than 24 hours old on the Saturday that I needed to collect that keychain. I planned to pop in on the way to the hospital, but when I got to my old house, Annie invited me in to talk about how things ended between us. I thought we had a good conversation and that both of us walked away with closure. She let me apologize for the way that I treated her, wished me best with my new family and hugged me as I left.

I admit I held on tightly to that hug, but it was purely because of relief, not lingering feelings. I spent less than an hour at her house then headed to the hospital. I didn't tell Jess anything about this because I know she still feels insecure about Annie and I didn't want to add any fuel to that. When I arrived at the hospital after seeing Annie, Jess had revoked my access and the ward manager wouldn't tell me why. I ended up being removed by a security guard because I was denied seeing my son for the

second time ever and I did not respond well to being blindsided. I tried calling Jess and her mom over and over and the only response I got was a screen recording of a message from Annie. It was doorbell footage of me walking through the door at 9.30, then back out just after 10.15. And the hug is only partly caught by the camera, so it does look like we could have been kissing. The message Annie sent with it said, Did he even shower and change his clothes between f***ing me and holding his son? Congratulations on being stuck with him for the next 18 years.

I hope it's everything you dreamed of. No one believed that this was a setup at all. It's something I would have never expected from Annie, and no one else would either, so they're completely rejecting the idea that this is a lie. I sent Annie a message asking why she did this, assuming I'd still be blocked. Her response was that she wasn't going to let me play innocent and that I may have deleted all of our messages over the past few months, but she hasn't. Obviously, there are no messages. But she blocked me again straight after, so I have nothing at all to exonerate

myself with. She waited in silence for almost a year, then took the most cruel and vindictive revenge that she possibly could. I've met my son only once, minutes after he was born, and now Jess is refusing any contact with me and won't let me see him. Court will take months, and my heart hurts every minute of every day. I know what I did to Annie was horrible, but I don't deserve this. I have no one to talk to about it because not even my own mother believes me. Her only question was why I ruined my life with the baby when Annie was willing to reconcile.

And that's about the most supportive things she's said to me since I was dumped. The few friends who stuck with me are assuming the worst too, and it's killing me that not a single person I know seizes for what it is. Everything is ruined! Well, OP, since you're literally already a cheater, it is hard to believe that it was innocent. But, you know, even then, even if OP didn't do anything, the fact remains. He chose to go visit his ex instead of being with his newborn son who's freshly born like 24 hours ago. All this over a keychain? Really a keychain? Okay yeah, maybe it has sentimental value. Then send your friend to pick it up. Don't

leave your newborn baby and your wife who's still recovering just to go pick up some little tiny knickknack. Also you make it worse by not telling Jess what you were doing. I mean it sounds fishy. You could have told her that you were going over for a keychain. You could have not stayed there for 45 minutes. You could have gone with a friend. It kind of sounds like OP was hoping they would hook up but then when they didn't he could say, well nothing happened so I'm completely innocent. OP, you got played man. You played Annie and then Annie played you. You deserved it dude.

Our next reddit post comes from r slash family law. My ex and I, who were never married, split up three years ago. I tried communicating with her for a year or so and sent her money when I could, but I needed to sell my house so she had to move out. She moved close to her family house so she had to move out. She moved close to her family in another state with our two kids. After the house sold, I moved to Ohio and I haven't had any contact with her since. Well, apparently, she filed for child support two years ago and I had no idea until I was served papers in April.

Now they're asking for two years of back pay. I use an online calculator and if it's accurate, my monthly obligation would be like $1500. That's like $50,000 in back pay. Can they really do that to me? How can I be expected to pay that? I asked my lawyer and they said that it was a legit request and it's ultimately the judge's choice.

I can't wrap my mind around this at all! Our next reddit post comes from r slash relationship advice. My girlfriend Rain and I have been in a relationship for a few months. We didn't get together in the most conventional way because she was my wife's friend and we fell in love. My wife Rose and I lost that excitement in our relationship. My girlfriend and I got that excitement and unfortunately we started an affair. I regret it deeply, we should have told my wife right away, but we did end up confessing and unfortunately my wife did not take it well. Fast forward a couple of months. When I was married to Rose, she did a great job at being a wife and I took that for granted. She

made sure that we spent quality time together, did nice gestures and she was a great job at being a wife, and I took that for granted. She made sure that we spent quality time together, did nice gestures, and she was a great mother to our child. With my girlfriend Rain, she doesn't help at all with the baby and just sits there watching. To clarify, I have joint custody of the baby that I had with Rose, and I'm now staying with Rain and she doesn't do anything. I have asked her to help and she complains. Mind you, Rain also hasn't seen her child in months. She had a child with her ex-husband and makes zero effort to see her child. She's so indifferent about it. It's crazy.

But perhaps worst of all is she goes to the club all the time and doesn't let me know. She'll just come home at 3-4am and it annoys me. Meanwhile, I come home from work and I cook and clean. I don't mind her going out, but all the time? She needs to at least act like a partner. It's- Oh man, this last line. It seems like she just prioritizes fun. Yeah, OP. Prioritizing fun is how you got in this mess in the first place. Man, the lack of self-awareness that people have is just... It just blows my mind sometime.

It's, you know, leopards eating face. What?! I voted for the leopards to eat faces and they're eating my face! Huh?! How could this have happened?! Well, dude, I don't know why you dated a girl who doesn't care about children and then you're shocked that she doesn't care about your child. Oh god, people are dumb.

Our next reddit post is from r slash relationship advice. I'm a 53 year old woman and my husband is 57. We've been married for 27 years. We're Indian and had an arranged marriage. I'll be honest, my husband and I both agree that past the initial 1-2 years of our marriage, it was just a mutual respect and understanding, not really love. We had our son, who's now 26, to appease our families and that was it. My husband and I grew up in India but moved to the States when our son was 4 years old

so his upbringing was mostly here. We both raised him how we knew best and thought that we did our job in raising a respectful, hardworking man. My son has a very authentic and paradoxical personality. He's egotistic and arrogant, but loving, selfless and caring at the same time. He's someone who's passionate about weightlifting and martial arts, but enjoys philosophy, photography, and poetry. He paid his own way through school through a combination of the two jobs that he worked in high school, merit scholarships, and internship salaries. He got a very well paying job right after graduating and has already received two promotions early in his career. And he's been able to purchase a very nice home and install a

pool and home gym, as well as sending my husband and I some money every month. He got married 4 months ago to his girlfriend of 2 years. She's also currently 10 weeks pregnant, and I have a great relationship with her. My husband and I are very proud of our son for who he's become. Now the incident. My husband and I live in a different state, and we flew out to visit our son and daughter-in-law over the weekend. I thought it was great, and I was all smiles and a few tears when we left on Sunday night, but my husband looked devastated.

It took me three days to press him about it, and he finally opened up today about what happened during our visit. On Saturday night, my husband woke up in the middle of the night and randomly looked out the window and saw our son and his wife kissing in the pool and drinking something out of wine glasses. My husband confronted our son on Sunday morning for two reasons. One, drinking during pregnancy, but turns out it was just sparkling juice. And two, making out in the pool.

We're from a really conservative culture, and doing any physical affection in public or around parents is a no-no. And my husband felt the need to question our son about this, and it led to an argument between the two of them, where my husband said something along the lines of, I couldn't even think of doing that around your grandparents. I thought that I raised you differently. Didn't I teach you anything? My son blew up at this and let all of his feelings out in a 10 minute vent.

I'll summarize my son's points below. Our son said that the only thing he learned was what NOT to do as a husband and father, and he said that he would rather kill himself than be anything like my husband. My husband did often physically discipline him between the ages of 7 and 17. Our son said that he has no happy memories with his father. And when someone asked him about his father, all that comes to mind was getting beaten in the living room, getting beaten in his room, and getting beaten in the basement. He highlighted two incidents that we barely remember when he was 7 years old. My husband picked him up by his ears.

Yo, is that even physically possible? My husband picked him up by his ears. Yo, is that even physically possible? My husband picked him up by his ears for lying about something trivial. And when he was in his freshman year of high school, when my husband beat him right when he woke up before school since he stayed up extra late working on a passion project the night before, our son remembers the exact date that this happened. Our son told my husband that when someone does this to you, you make it your goal to not be like that person, and he was happy and proud to not have learned anything from his father. Our son said that his father was someone who was scared of everything, discouraged everything

he wanted and was a hypocrite. He brought up examples like when our son was beginning to have opportunities to play a sport at the college level, my husband's reaction was to tell him that sports would affect his academics. And then when my son did eventually leave the team after two and a half years in college, by his own choice, my husband gave him flak forts. When our son confided in my husband that he had gotten into a fight at school, my husband's first reaction was to ask if we should go to the cops and if we should tell me. When my son was 22, he said that he wanted to visit a religious pilgrimage site alone in a different country, and my husband's first reaction was to just shut his idea down completely

under the pretense of it not being safe. When our son was in his sophomore year of high school, he was selected to travel to Australia for an academic competition that would have cost us around $6,000 total, and we were fully prepared to pay for an academic competition that would have cost us around $6,000 total. And we were fully prepared to pay for all of it. But when he questioned why we weren't willing to spend that money on a long term athletic training or even a new cell phone for him despite him asking for the past year, my husband kicked him out of the house for being ungrateful. My husband and I also wanted his English to be as good as possible, so we rarely spoke to him in our native language.

But as he grew up, he wanted to learn his language by himself, and my husband always heavily discouraged this. My son asked my husband what kind of father doesn't pass along his own mother tongue to his child and discourage this. When our son started an online business, my husband was again very against it because he didn't like the idea. 4. Our son said that anytime he expressed his true thoughts, my husband would simply be

there to make sure to disagree and discourage whatever it was that he wanted. Our son told my husband that he feels forced to lie and hide the truth about everything in fear of judgement, and he feels caged whenever he talks to him. He referred to my husband as the anti-role model. 5. Our son barely touched on the drinking in the pool incident and just told my husband to not bother coming over to his place if he has an issue with him loving his wife. So the thing is, everything that my son said in his rant is factually correct. My husband and I always viewed that as us wanting in his rant is factually correct. My husband and I always viewed that as us wanting to keep him safe for the future.

I never knew that some of these things bothered our son so much. What? Getting beaten nonstop for 10 years? Oh, you didn't like that, huh? Truly, I hope that our son's relationship with his wife is infinitely better than mine and my husband's, so I really don't care about them kissing in their own pool in their backyard at night. What I care about is that our son hates his father and the fact that he said that he has no happy memories of them breaks my heart.

Looking back, I definitely could have stepped in when my husband was being tough love dad, and things might have been better right now if I had. My husband admits that he did go overboard on several occasions and is telling me that he regrets many things he did as a father, and he would do anything for a do-over. For now, I'm planning on ensuring that there's zero contact between my husband and my son, but I don't know the plan for the future. How can I patch things up between my son and my husband, even a little? OP, to be frank, you're lucky that your son is keeping you and your life at all.

Because yeah, it was the dad who was doing all the abusing, but you just turned away, I suppose, ignored it, pretended it didn't happen. In my opinion, you're both terrible parents. That was r slash am I the devil, and if you liked this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.