rSlash - r/Askreddit What's The WORST Coworker You've Ever Worked With?

Episode Date: June 3, 2020

r/Askreddit Get ready for stories of the worst coworkers, dumbest employees, and douchiest bosses you could possibly imagine. We've got stories about literal drug addicts who come in and try to steal from the company, as well as entitled jerks who scam coworkers out of hours and cash. Do you have your own story about terrible coworkers? Let me hear from you via voice message! 🔔 Subscribe: https://bit.ly/2E3A8i6 💬 Discord: https://discord.gg/Rtwc9ZC 🎧 Podcast: https://link.chtbl.com/rslash ⚓ Send me a voice message: https://anchor.fm/rslash 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rslashyt/ ♪ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@rslash0 🛒 Merch: http://bit.ly/rSlashMerch Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

These side marios all you can eat is all you can munch a soup salad and garlic home Welcome to our slash a podcast where I read the best posts from across reddit today Subreddit is our slash ask reddit our first ask reddit question is what's the worst co-worker you've ever worked with Our first reply is Cernando. I hired a cook on good recommendation. He was just fine the first two weeks. Then I noticed food going missing. Then supplies started going missing.

Then a customer told me that he had been adding automatic 30% tips to his food purchases. When I looked at the books, I saw that he had been adding 30% tips to all the credit card sales, and the cash rings were off from what should have been sold. I fired him that day. The next day, he came in and apologized, said he was on drugs, and was going to rehab. I wished him well. The next day, he tried to break in after clothes and was caught. Idiots! Our next reply is from Jabberhockey. He just wouldn't work. Just wouldn't. This was in a research lab.

He was a visiting researcher from another country, and he spent a lot of time asking tons of non-work related questions to the point of disrupting others' work. In the course of a year, he designed one of very basic experiment and didn't actually do it, just designed it. He was above doing bench work apparently. He picked fights with everyone doing any experiment related to the one he was planning because he didn't want to have to share credit for anyone.

He wouldn't clean up after himself and he wouldn't pick up things from the floor. He actually called me in from another room because he wouldn't take a stringless tea bag out of his mug Also on a different occasion because he'd knock some things off a hanger on the back of the door and for whatever reason Wouldn't pick them up. It was kind of like working with a child He must have had servants where he lived. I don't know how, but he was there for his PhD The boss fired him. He was one of two people in her 30-year career that she'd ever fired. Our next reply is from Luc Farnall. I worked with a guy who'd interrupt any conversation to talk about anything as if he was the expert, and I don't use anything as

a hyperbole. He truly had something to say about anything, including things he had never heard of, or obviously didn't know much about. When the subject being discussed with something in the He truly had something to say about anything, including things he had never heard of or obviously didn't know much about. When the subject being discussed with something in the category of things he didn't know much about, he would slowly steer the conversation away from the original discussion to something he would like to talk about at the moment. It was both amazing and the most annoying thing I ever had to deal with. He was like that wicket-pd game where you start with star wars and somehow end up with lgpdq struggles. Not to mention the conversation was basically 98% of him just

talking non-stop. Everybody else was too polite and against conflict to say anything, including me, so most people just tried to stay away from him, but he'd follow people around. I eventually left, but I even remember having a nightmare where he was the best man at my wedding. Our next reply is from Killer Catwurst. This guy named Daniel I used to work with McDonald's in high school. He let everyone know he worked out and enjoyed being on the football team. He had this thing about taking five dumps a day. He would walk by on his way back from the toilet, chest out, shoulders back, and triumphantly announced, that's dump number 3.

Fing Daniel. So what you're saying is Daniel literally couldn't keep that shit to himself? Our next reply is a Mstowick Minotaur. This is about 15 years ago, but the office I worked in instituted a sent-free policy. One woman who was already insufferable was so offended by it that she snuck in her perfume collection. She'd walked down the halls and spray perfume into empty offices or cubicles when no one was looking or before everyone arrived in the morning.

This went on for well over a month or two and we had no idea who was responsible. My co-workers and I started referring to this mysterious person as the Chanel Bandit. She was finally caught on camera in the act. She'd left for three weeks' vacation and was unaware that we'd installed cameras after a break-in. Some of us already suspected her as the Chanel Bandit mysteriously stopped spraying while

she was away. She quit right after she was caught. None of us were sad to see that cedar-centred psycho leave. Our next reply is from Little Cat. I had to manage her ones who dumped trash on my desk my third day there. He said it was to remind me that taking out trash was part of my job description. It wasn't. I was a research assistant and a mortgage firm. Our next reply is from Jello Jock. My worst coworker was when I worked with when I was a cashier at Walmart. She approached me and asked me to cash out her paycheck.

I was still new at the job and never got training on how to do that function. She was sympathetic, so she walked me through how to do it. Transaction over and done, I go on about my day. I get called back a couple of days later by my managers, and they circled me in an office and accused me of stealing. After tears, videotapes, and telling them what happened, they told me that apparently this co-worker of mine had stolen not only from me, but several other people that day as well.

They just wanted to confirm I wasn't in on the deal. F. Walmart, and F. that woman for almost getting me arrested. Our next reply is from the Knights of Liz. No contest, it was the literal crackhead I worked with for four months that was also secretly living in the office, and being completely nonsensical when he was actually working. We found a mattress folded up in the warehouse after he was let go and an actual brand new crack pipe with a price tag on it to boot, scrolled away back there. He and his family, it

wasn't just him living in the office, left discarded food everywhere, like pizza crust in the toilet brush holder in the bathroom, and they left hair in the sink in the bathroom as they were obviously bathing in there too, as we had no actual bathing facilities in the office. One day during his tenure, he sent an email saying his alarm didn't go off and he'd be in an x time, which kept getting moved back later and later. He eventually showed up at 4.40pm and we closed at 5pm lol. See comment above about secretly living in the office. How is it even possible to live in an office and be late for work? Our next reply is from Bobby Sanchez.

I've worked a lot of factories, but when I worked at was mainly for felons. They paid you complete garbage and worked you so hard it tearing up your body and mind. I just graduated high school and it was my second factory so I didn't know any better. One guy worked with we nickname Big Matt because there was already another Matt. Well Big Matt was a big fan of Crystal and steroids so the dude was absolutely jacked. But this 35 year old still live with his mom. He said it had to do with him being a kid and walking in on her being sexually assaulted and ever since then he never wanted to leave her alone.

At the time I thought, wow, that would explain the substance abuse. He just wants to be strong to protect her. Well, I was an effing idiot. Two months later, Big Matt and two other co-workers didn't show up. So I asked the supervisor what happened, but he didn't know either. Next day, one of the co-workers came in and told us that all three had been arrested after buying an ounce of weed. Because Big Matt's mom called the cops on them.

So before the cops showed up, an over 6 foot tall buff method beat his mother within an inch of her life for calling the cops on him. Next day I looked him up, and sure enough he was booked in a local prison. Our next reply is from Belarus. He was a complete utter moron. He was a complete, utter moron. He was incompetent in every way. But the icing on the cake was when he tried to put one of the pickup trucks into gear with the wiper stick and called me an idiot when I told him it was the wrong lever.

Our next ask-reddit question is, D&D Dungeon Masters of Reddit. What's the most useless magic item you've ever given to your party and how they use it? Our first reply is from Tyrathius. We were playing through a pre-made campaign. At one point, the players retrieved a magical artifact which turns out to be an orb of control dragons. It does exactly what you would expect. In theory, it could have been very useful except no dragons were showing up in the campaign, so it was basically useless. It did, however, lead to a running gag where our most paranoid player kept attempting

to control Dragon on random NPCs to see if they were actually secret dragons in disguise. Our next replenisher, Malustalin. Once, my party got a huge, beautiful magic sword, which was improperly identified as a sword of ogre sling. Instead, it was a curse sword of ogre saying, whoever wielded it would only be able to yell ogre at things. Several

adventures later, they were attempting to catch a thief who was evading them. They came up with the brilliant idea of setting the sword as bait, and just going about their business. Sure enough, sometime later they heard Oger, Oger, Oger! Ring out through the town and they caught him without consequence. And then AJ replies to that, it's all Oger for that guy. Our next reply is from Hale-Sate-Tin. When one of my players found a magic ring in the wreckage of a burnt wagon, he provisionally identified it as a ring of invulnerability. He spends most of the rest of the sessions swanning about like he's invincible, until he's confronted by a veritable army of goblins. Combat immediately ensues. And to his surprise, he's quickly filled by the javelins and simitars. As he lays there bleeding

out in the dirt, he notices that the... As he lays there bleeding out in the dirt, he notices that the as he lays there bleeding out in the dirt, he notices that the ring is completely undamaged. Metrolinx and cross links are reminding everyone to be careful, as Eglinton Cross-Town LRT train testing is in progress. Please be alert, as trains can pass at any time on the tracks. Remember to follow all traffic signals, be careful along our tracks, and only make left turns where it's safe to do so. Be alert, be aware, and stay safe. This NBA season make every three-pointer Al-Euoop and buzzer-beater even more exciting with fan-dual.

Download the app today to see why we're North America's number one sports book. 19 plus and physically located in Ontario, gambling column call 18665312600 or visit connectsentario.ca. Our next reddit post is from Rees. An orb that states the closest magical item to it. It always states itself. Our next replies from Puff Matty Bear. I was playing a campaign on a tropical island type of place and an enemy knocked my weapon off a cliff, so I used a coconut as an improvised

weapon, crit with that thing four times in a row and decided to keep it for last hitting people. I was a barbarian, and the DM liked the coconut last hitting so much that he had me keep track of the kills, and I eventually had a plus 3 coconut that on a crit, would ricochet until it didn't kill something. So basically, he gave me a coconut of great potential. Our next replies from Vince Mooker, a rope that couldn't be tied, not even for a second. They were facing a dragon who loved puzzles and eating non-dragons. They gave him the rope and made the deal that if the dragon couldn't make a knot within an hour, then the dragon would need to let them pass through.

Our next replies from Havenig was a ring of fire identification. If you pointed it at something, it would declare in a loud, clear voice, fire, or not fire. Obviously useful when faced with illusory flames, but for some reason the party didn't spring for it. And Kira Ray replies to that, it's a fire-distinguisher. Our next reply is from Whatta Waste. They found a wand that creates a random and unique lock that incorporates itself into the substance it's used on. So it might make a suspicious recess in a stone wall or a brass-plated keyhole on a wooden

door. If it was probed with lockpicks, you would encounter moving tumblers or some other appropriate but unique locking mechanism. The lock was completely non-functional though. It didn't magically create a compartment, it just made a lock. Even if he uses on a desk drawer, it never made a latch or bolt. So the drawer would open perfectly fine while having a useless metal cylinder with tumblers that weren't connected to anything.

If you successfully picked the lock, it always felt like a real lock despite lacking the physical pieces. It would make a soft, chiming noise, and the lock would evaporate. The wand was a training tool used by a famous locksmith to challenge himself and his students. It had no practical application at all outside of that profession. It ended up being used by the druid to constantly mess with the rogue. The druid would take every opportunity to wild shape into a small critter good for scouting, and then place fake locks anywhere the rogue might conceivably try to use his search skill. The rogue's increasing paranoia every time he found a lock, and his

overblown promises of vengeance every time a random hole in a floorboard wasted a minute of his time and shined at him was a pretty good gag. It turned a little sour when the druid made an extra lock on an honest to goodness treasure chest. The rogue rolled a natural 20 to pick the first lock and got a chiming noise. Then he rolled a 3 and triggered an energy draining trap that permanently lost him 5 hit points. After that, the rogue stole everyone one that drew it in the middle of the night and threw them all into a bottomless pit in the under-dark.

Our next reply is from Defcon 1. I wasn't a D&D dungeon master, but I played Niroshima. It's a post-apocalyptic RPG system with a setting kinda like Fallout or Mad Max. One guy was so effing stubborn searching one abandoned building that I finally gave him a potato. This dude carved it into the shape of a hand grenade and painted it green. Then he used it in a negotiation with some NPCs, pretending that he was insane and bluffing that he was gonna blow them all up along with himself. Well I was really impressed and proud of the creativity of this player. Our next reply is from Nejark Nehillist.

A plus 3 sword of Edward Tumbleton slang. Edward Tumbleton was a tailor in a nearby city. They discovered a sword that was very effective at killing him. Just up his shop with a fireball. The sword was never used. Our next replies from Been End. I once gave my party a magic spoon. It emitted a terrible aura of dark illusion magic, and merely holding it filled players with a sense of dread from its sheer chaotic energy.

It's in-game abilities, it worked like a fork instead of a spoon. So I actually have my own story of a magic item. When I was a teenager, I used to play D&D a lot with my friends, and one time when I was a DM, I gave my players a non-descript box. Now a non-descript box was actually a specific magic item that was basically a box that was so boring that you forgot that it existed. And if it was ever out of your sight for more than like a minute, you had to make continuous wheelchairs every minute to keep remembering it or else you would forget it.

This enchantment applied to everyone except for the owner, so the owner never forgot that it existed and never forgot where it was. When I gave it to my players, I was assuming that they were gonna use it to just store their stuff, you know, like just keep all their stuff in the box, go off adventuring, and then come back to camp and all their stuff would be safe,

because no one would notice their box. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, but that's not how they used it. They came across these cobbles, which if you don't know, are these small, kind of like lizard people that are maybe like three feet tall. They're typically evil, but not always. And after defeating the tribe of cobalds,

they were trying to figure out what evil organization they worked for so they were interrogating the survivors. That's when the owner of the box got the idea to stuff one of the cobalt inside the box. And of course, the cobalt instantly failed the will save to remember that he was in a box. So this poor cobalt was stuck in like a three-foot by three-foot box, but he kept forgetting that he was inside the box or why he was in the box or that he even got put in the box in the first place. And then the party just left for like an hour. Meanwhile, this cobalt is having this like out of body

existential crisis where he doesn't know where he is. He knows he's trapped and he doesn't know where are how or why he's trapped. Because as soon as he remembers that he's in a box, he instantly forgets that he's in the box. And then eventually the party comes back and lets the poor little thing out of the box. And by then he's more than willing to tell everyone anything they need to know. Our next replies from Dragonfly.

In a game I'm currently in, our DM gave us a flask of endless water. It can produce water in a trickle, a flood, or day loose that shoots 30 gallons of water in one turn. Our cleric had just fallen from a bridge over a chasm and through clever biasing, our sorcerer had managed to catch the falling cleric with a web spell. As we're all racking our brains trying to figure out a way to save them, our cleric pulls out the flask and uses the water cannon mode to propel herself back into the bridge using the web strands as a fulcrum. And then, ephemeral being replies, you think that's bad. I had to literally ban the 3.5 spell create water because my entire party

role classes that could learn it, and solved everything with that stupid cantrip. It would blow your mind how many puzzles, traps, combat encounters, and social situations can be solved by liberal application of magic water. Someone refuses to talk, water board them. Pressure plates might be down the hallway, set them off from a distance with a flood. There's a locked, anything? Break it by dropping water from a height. Ambushed, turn the road to mud and run away.

Setting an ambush, turn the road to mud and wait. Starving, you can survive for 10 days on just water. Need to escape from a conversation? A pipe burst and the building floods. The list goes on. Turns out, physicists and engineers can turn a cantrip into the power equivalent of a ninth level spell given enough thought.

That was our slash ascrated. and today we've got a shout out. I'm shouting out fans about once a week as a way to say thanks to the people who support my podcast. Hi our slash, this is Connor. I've been such a huge fan of you and you go for probably around 2-3 years, and I was there when you were at, I think, 200,000 subscribers. I've been using your podcast for a while now to bite, and actually yesterday, I did my first ever,000 subscribers. I've been using your podcasts for a while now to bike and actually yesterday. I did my first ever full marathon. It was four hours and for all four hours, I had your podcast in my ear. I went to YouTube. I went to anchor and I just listened and it was very fun.

Just I could push through the whole way. Thank you so much. Thanks, Connor, for supporting my podcast and congratulations on your marathon. Thank you so much.