rSlash - r/Bestof Boyfriend Stalked Me Before We Met

Episode Date: June 23, 2025

0:00 Intro 0:11 Planned 5:08 Gift 11:39 Romance scam Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Gotta be honest, shopping for a car used to make me second-guess everything. Is this a good price? Am I being upsold? Am I missing a better deal somewhere else? That's why I'm glad I found CarGurus. It took all that uncertainty and threw it out the window. With hundreds of thousands of cars from top-rated dealers, I could finally compare options side by side and know for sure I wasn't getting taken for a ride. The advanced search tools, the unbiased deal ratings, even the price history, they gave me everything I needed to feel confident. And clearly I'm not alone. CarGurus is the number one rated car shopping app in Canada on the Apple app and Google

Play stores. That says something. Buy your next car today with CarGurus at CarGurus.ca. Go to CarGurus.ca to make sure your big deal is the best deal. That's C-A-R-G-U-R-U-S dot C-A. CarGurus dot C-A. Mom, Mom, did you see my race? Of course I did, darling. Look, you did your best.

You tried. The thing is, it's not about winning, it's about taking part. Next year you might do better. But I did win, Mom! You did? When it's sunny, make sure you can still see. At Specsavers, get two pairs of glasses from $149, and one can be prescription sunglasses. Hey, the sun won't wait. Visit Specsavers.ca for details. Conditions apply. Welcome to r slash best of Redditor updates, where OP discovers that she's actually dating her insane stalker. Our next Reddit post is from r slash true off my chest.

My boyfriend admitted that he orchestrated our meet cute. I have no idea how I feel about what he told me. I want to think it's cute that he cared this much, but it's just coming off as creepy and I feel lied to. He got drunk because we were celebrating my first successful day at my clinicals and he ended up saying something along the lines of, could you believe we wouldn't be this happy if I hadn't watched you for so long? To which I was confused and didn't know what he meant. Well, I had worked at a local library for two years before we met, during college,

and apparently he saw me there but didn't actually talk to me. He would just watch me and listen in on my conversations with the people I was checking out and my co-workers to figure out what I liked. Then, he apparently followed me and found the coffee shop that I frequented. All this time, I thought that we had a sweet first time meeting story. He accidentally bumped into me, apologized, and offered to buy me coffee for the trouble. He told me what he was ordering, and it was the exact same thing that I always get, and I thought that it was an amazing coincidence. I joked that it was fate, and we spent like an hour talking over coffee. I feel so stupid.

Apparently, it was similar to a scene in a book that I'd read, and I told my coworker that I thought that it was cute. I'm just so frustrated and angry. I feel betrayed, like, why would you do this? And how much of our year and a half relationship is a lie? Like, it sounds like he was stalking me. Then, OP posted an edit. Just so we're all on the same page, of our year and a half relationship is a lie. Like it sounds like he was stalking me."

Then OP posted an edit. Just so we're all on the same page, I don't believe that he was watching me the whole time I was working there. I think it was the last six months or so before I actually met him. He's 25 and I'm 22. I've also never really been worried about my safety with him before, but I do know that he has anger issues, and he's gotten into trouble for getting into a few physical fights. So for those of you worried about me, I'll be watching for any signs

that I might have missed. I'm mainly just upset because I feel like our relationship was built on a lie, even if it was a small one. He also said that he was interested in a lot of the same things that I was when we first met, and for a while he kept up with them. But lately he hasn't at all, and I'm now wondering if he lied about those things too. Then OP posts another edit. I was wrong. He's done nothing wrong. Then three days later OP posted an update.

First, no, I did not make the last edit. My boyfriend went on my phone while I was showering and while I was trying to figure out what I wanted to say to him about everything, and he found and edited my post. He then started yelling at me while I was still in the shower about sharing it online and calling him creepy. At the same time, he was guilt tripping me and telling me that it was romantic, and he did it because he loved me. He literally read a few of the comments out loud to me.

He barely let me get out of the shower, but I did manage to get my clothes on while he was screaming at me. What really freaked me out was that he started listing off things that he could have done to me. I won't list them here because it was extremely gruesome and I don't think it's allowed. But he said that he didn't do those things because he's such a nice guy. The way he described the things that he could have done though made me feel like he had genuinely considered doing it.

Also, I thought that he was only watching me for a few months. Apparently, it was upwards of a year and it was genuine actual stalking. He had followed me home and to my college campus. He pulled out a collection of my lost hair ties that he kept. I told him that he was scaring me and that we needed to take a break and come back to it later. At that, he put a hole in the wall next to my head. I told him I was leaving after that because F that, and it was like a switch flipped and he started crying.

He got on his knees and begged me to stay and apologized. I ended up accepting his apology because I didn't feel safe leaving. Yesterday morning after he left for work, I grabbed all my important documents and irreplaceable things before clinical started and kept them in my car. After my clinical, I didn't go back to the apartment. I'm not going to give much more detail than that, because he does know my account, obviously. And Andrew, if you're reading this, which we both know you are, please just leave me alone.

The person I thought I loved doesn't actually exist, and that's heartbreaking. I no longer feel safe with you like I did before and I hate that. Please, let's just move on from each other. The whole point of best of redditor updates is it's, you know, a post that gets updated sometime later so we get closure. I feel like we're gonna see OP return in like five years. Oh, by the way, Andrew's been stalking me and he tried to kidnap me but now he's in jail or something to that effect. Because Andrew seems nuts.

Our next Reddit post is from rslashamithebutthole. Am I the butthole for refusing to buy my boyfriend's daughter a gift and silencing his notifications while I was away on a business trip? I'm a 32 year old woman and I went on an 8 day business trip to Japan. I work as an external consultant for a company. This visit was to scale our services. Me and three other colleagues visited Japan, but we would be at the same site for only two days until we were spread out to other areas.

And I was very excited until I told my boyfriend, Brian, a 38 year old who I've been dating for 8 months. His reaction wasn't very positive. I asked what was going on, and he said he was spaced out because of situations at his job, but he assured me everything was fine. Days later, he asked if I could take him on the trip. This caught me off guard, and I said I needed to think about it, and then he said that he would want his daughter to come along too.

I understand his point. She's 17, loves anime and has impressive knowledge on some very niche characters. But also I have my own kids ages 4 and 5 and I would rather share that experience with them. Although realistically speaking bringing them would be unprofessional. My accommodations were paid for by the client, and that had already been confirmed. I got a very nice accommodation, but it was definitely booked for a single traveler. My colleagues had other rooms. Bringing his daughter would require a separate bedroom or a suite. I wouldn't go back to cancel on the accommodation or ask for a larger space,

which would be unthinkable, or do anything to mess up the accommodation or ask for a larger space, which would be unthinkable, or do anything to mess up the schedule. When I told Brian, he said that I should be able to ask for some changes. I also realized that he wasn't ready to pay for any of this, since he said that he would reimburse me later. I am financially okay, but the whole idea of this trip is to make more money, not spend it, and potentially be unable to recover from the spending.

Also, this was never a vacation or anything, and he said things that indicated that he didn't understand me or believe me when I said that me and my team were on a tight schedule. I could definitely spend time with him and his daughter after work, but I couldn't bring them this time, not in this situation. I didn't ask the client at all because I was embarrassed. Also, I began to worry about his sense of humor. It's not like I've mastered Japanese business etiquette, but I took the time to learn, and Brian sometimes does things that get him in trouble.

I would have to have dinner with the client and my colleagues, and I guess I could have my boyfriend stay at the hotel, which is not a great way to treat your partner or bring him along even if it was permitted. When I candidly expressed my concern to him, he got extremely pissed off and gave me the silent treatment. This stressed me out and I told him so. I left for the airport while he was still not talking to me. We talked only a few times while I was abroad.

His daughter didn't reply to any of my messages. I don't know if he falsely told her that she was getting an early high school graduation present, as in this trip, or if she was just mad at me. I found a huge plush anime character and took a selfie asking if she liked it. No answer. About one or two days before I flew back,

he started texting me with requests. He wanted me to get XYZ, this and that for his daughter and his nieces. I got very angry because she didn't even reply. But he had no problem asking for more and more stuff, and that just put me off. I told him that his daughter never replied to any of my messages, and he didn't say anything about that. I ended up silencing his notifications and buying presents only for my family. When I got back, all I wanted was to spend time for my kids since I've never been away from them. I kept putting off seeing Brian until

last Friday when we met for pizza and he looked uncomfortable. He said that I let his daughter down by allowing her to think that she was getting the plush toy and was also in disbelief when I confirmed that I didn't bring her anything. I told him that I didn't think it mattered since she completely blanked me out. We had a back and forth, but there was no resolution. I feel more lost than when this whole thing started. I feel like he thinks a gift for his daughter was a solution to everything, and I disagree. I'm doing my best to create a good future, and I'm on the fence about continuing the relationship. I care about him and his kid,

but I'm afraid of being used and dragged down, and the way he pressured me made me really uncomfortable. I'm also a bit hurt because I'd built a relationship with his daughter, and not getting a single reply to my messages is honestly a bad look. I'm tempted to think that she's either angry because I didn't agree to bring them along, or that maybe he told her to ignore me. I'm planning on ending things because I need clarity, but also maybe I'm being unfair. I think there's the possibility that he got overly excited and got carried away, but I know that he'll likely be unable to pay me back. Am I the butthole? Then, one day later, OP posted an update.

We broke up last night. He wanted to come to my place, but I didn't allow it. I drove to his place instead and delivered two packages that had been delivered to my PO box and told him I'd return any mail and packages to address to him from now on. I didn't get out of my vehicle. The conversation was very short, but very sour. I told him he acted too greedy and conceded for me to feel any interest in prolonging the relationship. He tried to explain that his daughter was hurt because she had her hopes set on that trip, but I said this was a lesson for her so that she learns to work for her own things when she becomes an adult, instead of piggybacking her way. And also, this is on him as a father.

I love to avoid more back and forth. I asked him never to contact me again and block them both. I already changed my locks, changed all my streaming passwords, etc. Kinda surprising he had this level of audacity after only eight months of dating expecting you to just bankroll a free vacation for him and his daughter, which by the way would be pretty unprofessional. It sounds like OP is in a sales position where client is king and the whole point of her job is to just make the client happy and to maintain that relationship. This boyfriend actually wanted OP to contact the client and say, hey, you know that flight

that you're paying for me and that hotel room that you're paying for me as well? Could you cancel all that stuff and book me three flights instead of one and book me two hotel rooms instead of one so I can bring my family on an elaborate Japanese vacation? Thank you so much, arigato! Our next Reddit post is from r slash amithabudhole. Am I the butthole for telling my coworker that she's falling for a romance scam and now she's upset? My friend Nancy and I worked together for 3-4 years at a hair salon.

Nancy's in her early 30s. Kind of an airhead, gullible, but a really kind and nice person. She's currently in a relationship with this guy for about 6 months. He lives in New York, we're in the Midwest. They talk on the phone all the time. He's been out here a couple of times to visit. We've never met, but heard a lot about their relationship. This morning, she texted me at 6am asking to borrow $10,000 because her boyfriend's

mom has a family emergency and needs the money soon. She said he's working on an offshore oil rig in Dubai for two months and couldn't transfer the money until he's come back to the states. She doesn't have the money, so she asks if I can ask my relatives for the 10k for her. I have to stop this story for a second. Some of you might be thinking, wait a second, R slash read this story before. That is not the case. This is a brand new story on this channel, but I did read another story where a romance scammer similarly claimed to work on an oil rig and ask for money.

So this is apparently a really common tactic for scammers. So I just want to clarify that because I also had like a, wait a second, this feels really familiar moment. Anyways, back to the story. I told her that this sounds like a romance scam and that if he's asking her for such a big amount of money like that early in their relationship, it's a red flag and she should reconsider. I told her that I don't know her boyfriend that well and if he goats her then either

me or her would be on the hook for 10k. Now she won't answer my texts or call. She also took a personal day from work today. Am I the butthole? Should I have kept my mouth shut and minded my own business? Then OP posted an edit. Yes, she's very naive and gullible. She believes she can talk to ghosts and spirits.

That's another can of worms that I won't get into. She didn't bring her boyfriend around when he was in town a couple of times. She just offered a bunch of excuses. I told her sister about it and got an earful about how I shouldn't judge a person in need like that. I gave up. I sent her a few articles about sweetheart and pig butchering scams. Still no reply. I know she read the messages. She's not the type that's loaded. She lives with her parents in their basement and lives paycheck to paycheck. I hope she'll realize this is a scam before she's in debt. This will be an expensive lesson.

Then a few days later OP posted an update. She just texted and asked for the money under the guise of her sister needing it. I gave a flat out no. I feel bad for her. I told other co-workers and my boss about it so they can say no to her, and maybe she'll understand from a group perspective that we're trying to protect her. Then, two weeks later, OP posts the final update. What me and redditor suspected was true. She was in a romance scam. She has never

met her boyfriend in person. They only talk online. She said she was lonely and was afraid of being alone. She said her boyfriend stopped contacting her after she couldn't get the money and started asking simple questions. After that, she realized that he was scamming her. She started telling me about how she had been sending him small amounts of money, like $50 to $500 the past 6 months to help him out with some small emergency. When he ghosted her after she couldn't help him with the 10k, she realized she had been romance scammed. I'm glad she saw it for what it was. Earlier today you guys, I was sitting on the

toilet browsing TikTok. I came across a video that I would have 100% believed was completely real and not AI generated, if not for the fact that it was a man on the street interview set in medieval times. So this guy with a microphone came up to a peasant in medieval England and was like, hey, how's your day today? And the guy's like, oh, well, I stepped in cow poo and I got taxed today. I think we might get invaded by raiders later. But other than that, it's been pretty good, I guess. And it looked so like it looked like real people

doing real things in actual medieval England. Like AI is getting so insanely good. I'm honestly scared for the future of scam victims. Because even when I intentionally try to look for AI, I still get fooled sometimes. And some of you guys might be thinking, Eh, R slash, what an idiot getting fooled by AI. Have you seen the stuff coming out nowadays?

Not like a month ago, not two months ago, but today it's nuts. So these posts of people getting scammed, it's going to get a thousand times worse. Because pretty soon scammers are going to realize they can facetime and make their faces look like some hot Ten out of ten supermodel who's like hey, I love you, but I live on an oil rig and I can't be with you So send me ten thousand dollars pretty please We're literally on the cusp of a boom in the scam industry you guys guys be careful for real out there It's getting really dangerous. That was our slash best of Redditor updates.

And if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast, because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.