rSlash - r/Bestof Husband Missed the Birth of Our Baby to CHEAT!

Episode Date: February 21, 2024

0:00 Intro 0:11 Awful husband 4:56 Bad name Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices...

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome to r slash best of redditor updates, where OP's husband misses the birth of their first baby so that he can be with his mistress. Our next reddit post comes from r slash am I the butthole. Am I the butthole for not letting my husband meet our firstborn child? My husband has his best friend, Anna. They've been friends for a long time and dated years ago, mutually deciding that it's best for them to remain friends. I've had no problem with this relationship until now. On the day that I gave birth, Anna's brother got into a car accident. My husband got a call from her in the middle of the night and asked him if he could drop her at the hospital her brother was at, an hour away from us, since she was too scared to drive. My husband agreed, told me quickly while I was half asleep, and rushed out. A few hours later,
Starting point is 00:00:44 I had contractions and called my husband. He didn't pick up after multiple tries, so I gave up and called my dad, who drove me to the local hospital 12 minutes away. I was so scared of giving birth alone, since I had about three miscarriages and one stillborn. My husband promised me that no matter what, he'd be there for me. But guess what? He wasn't. He called me multiple times while I was in labor, and when he finally picked up my dad's call when I was giving birth, saying that he'd misplaced his phone in the chaos,
Starting point is 00:01:14 my dad told him that no matter how fast he drives anymore, he's gonna miss the birth of his first child. Well, my husband took that as, he's already screwed up, so it doesn't matter when he shows up at this point. So when he finally came, our daughter was about five hours old and I'd already moved to the maternity ward. When he came, I refused to let him see our baby. To be clear, I did let my husband hold and play with the baby after I got discharged. At the time, I was so high on emotions and was shaking when I saw him,
Starting point is 00:01:46 and I didn't want it to negatively affect my time with the baby. I wanted her birth to be a happy time, and I was already struggling to feed her. My husband was in a bad state and told me to please let him see her, so I told him to stand by the window and I held up the baby so that he could see her. I told him to leave and he'd be allowed to interact with the baby at my father's home when we were both well and out of the hospital, and that I was most likely divorcing him. He started bawling and apologizing and defending himself by saying that Anna's brother was in serious critical condition, and although he's fine, Anna needed him. That even though Anna's parents were there, she's not that close with them, and she was in an unbearable state. I told him that I didn were there, she's not that close with them and she was in an
Starting point is 00:02:25 unbearable state. I told him that I didn't care and that his daughter had already come second to him and she was just born. I'm putting my daughter and my health first and I will not let her be sidelined. My husband agreed and left. However, Anna called me later and said that I was being controlling and that she never met someone as cruel as me for not letting a father see his baby. Yo what? I told her that my husband made that decision and that this was not my doing. But now I can't help but feel cruel in my actions and feel like I'm depriving my baby of both her parents being together. My husband sees her a few hours each day now. Am I the butthole? Also, OP clarifies that Anna's brother was not in a life or death situation. He did have serious injuries,
Starting point is 00:03:11 but they were concentrated on his legs and arm. Also, OP is stressing that she's not saying she's never letting her husband see the baby. She's just saying that she only banned him from seeing the baby while they were in the hospital. Then, an unknown time later, OP posted an update. So, the divorce is probably going to happen. My brother is looking at lawyers for me. In the midst of this whole mess, this post made me realize that I never checked on Anna's brother to see how he's healing because I was so irked by Anna. I called him and he said that he was doing well and that he'll be out of his wheelchair soon. He asked me about the baby and how I was doing with the breakup and if I was okay with my husband and Anna. I can't believe I was so oblivious. I thought they had an emotional thing going on because of this and when I confronted
Starting point is 00:03:56 my husband he denied it and said that me and our baby were his priority and that he made a mistake and that he was being dumb. Yeah, no. Hannah's brother kindly informed me that he and Anna's parents all thought that my husband and I split up several months ago and that Anna and him were back together. He showed up at the hospital as Anna's boyfriend, which is why they didn't bat an eye that he was there and not with his pregnant wife because apparently we were split up. His brother's procedures were done early on so I have no idea what my husband and Anna were doing for all those hours but I don't even want to know. Yo this post is wild. Imagine abandoning your wife who's currently giving birth to your first baby so that you can go balls deep in your mistress and not even calling to check for five
Starting point is 00:04:46 hours to see if your baby made it out okay, especially since your wife has a history of stillborns. What scum! Our next reddit post comes from r slash am I the butthole. Am I the butthole for banning my wife from naming our baby after her dead best friend? So I'm a 28 year old man and my wife is 28. My wife has been estranged from her family since she was a teenager. My wife met Ava in school and they were inseparable with Ava letting my wife stay over a lot as well as providing a constant source of support. I met my wife at university. Unfortunately, Ava died suddenly a year into our relationship. I'd met her a few times and she was lovely. My wife was understandably devastated. Two years ago, we married and she took my last name,
Starting point is 00:05:32 Brown. Our baby girl is due in spring and understandably, my wife wants to honor Ava in her name. This is something that she said throughout our relationship. I was happy with the idea of honoring her and we've discussed baby names throughout the relationship and pregnancy. The number one name that we were tossing around was the name of a place that was significant for them. Yesterday, my wife came up to me and said that she had a dream about Ava asking her to remember her by her name and to memorialize her and that our baby must be called Ava. I said absolutely no way. She said why not and I reminded her of the historical figure Ava Brown, the wife of probably one of history's most evil figures. And I reassured my wife that we would tell our kid about Aunt Ava
Starting point is 00:06:19 and that she would always be remembered. However, my wife refused, saying that we have to use Ava's name. She says that few people will make the link to the historical character and that she won't be bullied at school. She said that she fell out of love with the place name and that a family member has had a baby recently with a similar name. Think Brooke versus Brooklyn. I suggested other names that have to do with Ava, such as her birthstone, or honoring her through a middle name, or even names that end in Eve or Eva. Anything but Eva itself. She started crying and said that she won't name the baby anything else, and that it's the ultimate way that Ava can live on. I said it's a terrible situation, and if we had literally any other surname, we would, but I literally can't. Not only am I
Starting point is 00:07:06 extremely morally opposed, I work in a field where if there was wind that I named my child Eva Brown, my work would be at risk. She says that I'm making excuses and not supporting her as she's putting a lot of effort into having this baby. This resulted in a fight, and now I'm on the couch for the second night now. Some of our friends are saying that I'm being dramatic, but my sister, the mother of the kid named Brooke, is telling me that if my wife continues to insist on this, then I should just register the baby's name without her. To be honest, I'm leaning that way if she continues to not compromise. I'm really not sure what to do. Am I the butthole for not wanting to name my baby Ava?
Starting point is 00:07:45 Hey, look, I can't believe I have to say this, but let's not name babies after Adolf Hitler's wife. OP, I really think you're in the clear here. I'm on your side. I think everyone else listening to this story is also on your side. Your wife says that she doesn't think anyone will make the connection. Everyone will make that connection. Also, OP clarifies, I actually didn't know this, but apparently in German, Ava Braun's name, I thought it was pronounced Ava Braun, is pronounced Ava Brown. So phonetically, it sounds identical to OP's last name. Then 22 days later, OP posted an update. Well, right after posting this, I called up Eva's sister, Rose, because my wife is really close to her and I explained the situation. I know that I shouldn't get people involved in marital matters, but Rose's
Starting point is 00:08:30 opinion really matters to my wife, especially when it comes to Ava. Rose agreed with me that naming a daughter Ava Brown would be harmful, and she mentioned something that we believe to be a game changer. One thing that you must know about the late Ava, dear reader, was that she was a writer. She kept journals, which her sister held on to after her death. In one of those, oh this is so sweet, in one of those journals was a baby name list where she gave five names for a girl and five names for a boy. Oh that's so sweet. Rose held on to those names when she was having children. One of her sons is named the top boy name. But now she's done having kids, and she
Starting point is 00:09:12 wants to give the list to my wife. But me and Rose both believe that we have to introduce this carefully, so we launched a game plan. The next day, I sat down with my wife and I told her in no uncertain terms would our daughter be called Ava. Brown is the only surname we have and Ava is not something I'd feel comfortable pairing with it. My wife is estranged from her family and she often jokes that we married so young, at the age of 22, so that she could get rid of her maiden name. She agreed that our child would take our married name, rid of her maiden name. She agreed that our child would take our married name, but continued to stress about forgetting Ava. I also mentioned that by naming a child Ava, she would be pressuring our child to live on on behalf of dead Ava, and that's a big burden for young shoulders. My cousin was named after a dead relative, and my grandparents often compared him to that relative, and that is
Starting point is 00:10:03 not something I want for my own child. That seemed to resonate with her, and she admitted that pregnancy was bringing up old feelings because she and Ava always said that they'd be pregnant together. I suggested therapy, and she started therapy last week. I then talked about mine and Rose's conversation, and she was very interested. We agreed that it would be lovely giving Ava the opportunity to name a child, knowing that it was something that she was seemingly passionate about and had narrowed it down between two of the five girl names. Turns out Ava had good taste. Being able to discuss baby names and thinking about our daughter as her own person has been a blessing, and I can see that my wife is on the men's.
Starting point is 00:10:41 I think this will be the only update, and I can't wait to meet my daughter. my wife is on the men's. I think this will be the only update, and I can't wait to meet my daughter. Oh my god, this post is so adorable. This is such a sweet update. That was r slash best of redditor updates, and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast, because I put out new reddit podcast episodes every single day.

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