rSlash - r/Bestof I Cast a Magic Spell to Make My Baby a Girl

Episode Date: January 18, 2023

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome to our slash best of editor updates, where we have one of the weirdest stories I've ever read. Our next reddit post comes from our slash am I the bad guy? Am I the bad guy for predetermining my baby's gender? Okay, to start off, I'm 27 and my husband is 28. We've been married for four years. His parents and I have never had any problems, but we've never quite meshed or seen eye to eye. We've always gotten along and been civil. Recently, we've never quite meshed or seen eye to eye. We've always gotten along and been civil. Recently, we've been talking a lot about our future family. My husband will be the last of his siblings to have kids. All of his siblings have at least one kid. It's been a running joke in the family that if our firstborn happens
Starting point is 00:00:38 to be a girl, she won't be accepted because everyone else has a boy for a firstborn. That joke has never sat quite right with me, but I've laughed it off because I don't want to start anything, and maybe I'm just being sensitive. Fast forward to a few months ago when we started trying. It took about three months for me to get pregnant. Infertility runs in my family, and my husband and I agreed on a big family, so I've been worried about starting a family so late in the game. When I did get pregnant, we were overjoyed. We had all the typical couple conversations
Starting point is 00:01:09 that came from having a baby, the excitement, names, nursery themes, gender predictions, etc. He talked about wanting a son first so that he could be the big strong leader for all of his younger siblings and carry on the family name. This is a very big deal to him and still buy his parents. I expressed my desire to have a little girl that I could dress up and match with. It became this playful banter between us. He'd refer to the baby as son and I'd call the baby daughter. About a week before our gender scan, I searched up all the old wives' tales and made us a
Starting point is 00:01:41 chart that we could fill out together to see who would hypothetically win our little bets. It included the rang test, Chinese horoscope, heartbeat, cravings, etc. The result ended up being about 50-50 in the end, which made us even more excited to find out for a certain at our scan. The following week, we went to our appointment and discovered that our baby was a girl. We were both extremely excited. My husband was disappointed to lose, but he told me that he was overjoyed to be raising a daughter by my side. That night,
Starting point is 00:02:11 we called our families to share the news. After calling his family, his mother asked to speak to him privately. I went to bed alone as their conversation carried on for well over an hour. The following morning, I woke up alone. There was a note on my husband's nightstand explaining that someone would be by the house to pick up his belongings later in the evening. I immediately tried to call him, only to realize that he had blocked my number. I then tried his mom.
Starting point is 00:02:36 His mother picked up on the first ring. Before I had a chance to get a word in, she started chewing me out, calling me a manipulative B word. I asked her what I did, and she told me that I'd ruined her son's reputation with my inexcusable behaviors and tendencies. What? What am I reading? I let her finish her rant before kindly asking her what the effort you're talking about. She told me that divorce papers were already written up, and I wouldn't
Starting point is 00:03:02 have the chance to tear apart the family like I'd been attending to do the whole time. What? Did I skip a paragraph? I'm confused. I again, slightly less kindly this time, asked her what the effort you're talking about, to which she told me that my husband would be leaving me because our child is a girl. I was gobsmacked. I explained to her that it takes two to tango,
Starting point is 00:03:28 and there's no way to truly decide the gender of the baby. And if her or her son had a problem with the gender, it was his fault because it's his chromosome that determines the gender. Right? Yeah. She's right. Opie's 100% correct. It's the sperm that determines the gender, not the egg. However, his mom said that she had proof that I had handpicked to have a girl. Like I said before, we used a calendar to determine which days would be best for intercourse. Well, my mother-in-law accused me of forcing him to do it with me on a specific day, which the Chinese horoscope would point to a girl. She also interrogated me on the position we used to conceive the baby. And to that, I gave her a piece of my mind and told her it was not of her business,
Starting point is 00:04:11 but she smuggly told me that my husband already told her, and the position we used makes it 60% more likely to have a girl that way. So, if anyone's currently trying to have a girl, specifically, doing cowgirls sometime in the middle of February should do the trick every time, apparently. She finished off by telling me that my clear preference for my family name was disgusting, and she was glad to finally be rid of me in my manipulative ways before hanging up. I've had no contact with my husband since, and it's been over a month. Yo, what?
Starting point is 00:04:44 Am I reading? He's been over a month. Yo, what? Am I reading? He's blocked me on everything. I can't help but feel that this hasn't all been his choice, but then again, he's a grown adult, so I can't imagine his mother controlling him like that. I've been staying with my sister since it all went down. She says that I can stay as long as I need, but I'm thinking that I want to get my own place. Maybe even one a few states away. What do I do? Should I'm thinking that I want to get my own place. Maybe even one a few states
Starting point is 00:05:05 away. What do I do? Should I pack up and move on? Should I continue trying to contact my husband? Any advice would be appreciated. Then two days later, OP posts an update where basically she says that she's deciding to move on and leave her husband. Also, important to note, she's going to go back to her maiden name and name her daughter, her maiden name as well. Then a few months later, OP posted an update. I was able to catch my husband as he was leaving work one night, and I got his side of the story out of him like I'd hoped.
Starting point is 00:05:35 As suspected, he admitted that he was excited for a baby girl, but after speaking to his mom, she forced him to leave and block me. His mother already had the divorce papers ready to go. Yo, what? I tried to tell him that we could fix this, that we could raise our daughter together away from his mother. My husband was having none of it. He said that he realized how conniving, manipulative, and abusive I'd been throughout our
Starting point is 00:06:01 entire relationship, and he did want to actually go through with the divorce. He said that he'd have no problem giving me full custody of the thing that's growing inside of me. That's when I lost all hope. F. Him! I have no problem leaving a man who so easily brainwashed by his mother like that. I'll raise this baby alone! That was bad enough, but here's the real icing on the cake. I received a phone call from my soon-to-be-ex-husbands, brothers, wife. She and I have always been friendly. Anyways, she told me over the phone that she overheard a conversation at Weekly Sunday dinner that my mother-in-law and husband are trying
Starting point is 00:06:40 to blindside me in court and take full custody. I was livid, full on seeing red. I called my mother and lost straight away and demanded to speak to my husband. All he had to say for himself was that he realized he didn't want any of his offspring to be raised by such a manipulative freak, and even though he doesn't actually want to raise her, he's sure that he can grow to love her again. I'm not sure what to do at this point. I know that I have a good case for myself, but I'm effing terrified that they'll win the battle and take everything from me. It brings tears to my eyes thinking about my daughter growing up somewhere that she
Starting point is 00:07:15 isn't loved. Even if custody is split 50-50, I'll have no control over the lies their guarantee to feed her. Oh my God, the story gets crazier! Okay, so another podcast that does Reddit readings, not mine but another one, cover the story up until this point, and apparently OP's husband found out about this post
Starting point is 00:07:36 through that podcast. Then, the husband went to the original post and replied, so this next update is from the husband. What the F is wrong with you, OP, I loved you and I loved our daughter. You paid me out to be such an effing villain and none of these pea brain people on the internet can see through these lies. Manipulation at its finest. You were such an effing beward for our whole goddamn lie of a relationship.
Starting point is 00:08:03 And when you were trying to get pregnant, everything was about you. I can't believe it took me so long to see all these signs. You were so effing obsessive over your stupid calendar and we hardly ever used it. You always say that you're not in the mood or we did it yesterday and I'm too tired, can we skip a day? It was never about me or my feelings, and then when you actually got pregnant, it became even more about you. I'm not eating eggs anymore, they make me sick. I don't want to go to Sunday dinner, I'm not up to it tonight. Let's not get sushi for dinner because it's bad for the baby. I was so effing nice to you, OP. I literally
Starting point is 00:08:40 do it on you like an effinging Prince charming and you never even recognized me I can't believe you strung me along all those years F you and F your fetus. Oh my god What am I reading? I'm sick of your games. I can't f-ing believe I find out about this post on a podcast that my girlfriend listens to You betrayed me one One effing month until you lose everything like I did. See you in court, be word. Then several months later, OP makes a post in R-slash divorce, which I'm not going to read because it's basically just her asking for support from other divorced moms. Then, about a month after that, OP posted a final update. Hey everyone, I ended up deleting Reddit for a while, but now that I'm feeling settled
Starting point is 00:09:29 again, I figured that I owed it all to give you one final update. First off, I won the court case. It's been a long and draining road, and I won't go into a ton of detail, but it was all thanks to Reddit. Someone connected me to a great lawyer and everything worked out exactly the way it needed to. I owe it all to you guys. Thank you so so much. And second, I gave birth to my sweet baby girl just a few short weeks ago. She's perfect and she's everything I needed. Babies heal the soul more than you could ever imagine. I couldn't have done it all without my sister cheering me on through everything. Then, in the comments of this post, someone asked OP, can you spill the tea on how your ex-mother-in-law
Starting point is 00:10:12 reacted when you won your case? OP replies, her reaction was pathetic, to say the least. She sobbed uncontrollably and called me every insult that she could possibly think of as I left. It gave me second-hand embarrassment to say the least. The judge wasn't buying any of her BS from the second that our case started, very satisfying to say the least. And OP further clarifies that she has full custody, that the husband has no rights to the daughter whatsoever. What episode is this? This is episode 1,483 of our slash reading Reddit stories.
Starting point is 00:10:49 You think by now I'd be kind of jaded, you know, like I've seen it all. No story can shock me anymore, but then you read a story like this. This was nuts! This was a wild ride! This was a roller coaster in text form. I'm trying to imagine what can you say to a soon-to-be father in a one-hour conversation that can make him go from being excited to be a father and loving his wife to hating his wife, hating his daughter, and moving out and wanting a divorce.
Starting point is 00:11:22 Like wow, the level of manipulation, it's like a Marvel supervillain. One hour phone call and it ruined your entire life. It's like mind control. What did that mom say to him? And the fact that she already had divorce papers ready, I was shocked, shocked, I tell you. So I guess what was really going on here
Starting point is 00:11:43 was that the mother-in-law just secretly hated OP's guts, and she was looking for any reason to get rid of OP. And the whole OP having a daughter thing just kind of fell into her lap, so she's like, ah-ha, here's my moment. Right? That has to be the case, because if she actually liked OP, then why would she have the divorce papers already ready? You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:12:04 So, this had to have been like a plan of hers for some time and the baby was just unexcused to make it happen, which makes it extra extra tragic because that means logically that the mother doesn't actually care about the gender of the baby. She's just using that as an excuse to separate her son from OP, which means in turn that this woman intentionally poisoned her son against his own daughter and ruined his relationship with his daughter and killed the love that he had for her just as like collateral damage to get the divorce. And like don't get me wrong here, I'm not trying to make it seem like the husband is a victim, because any man who can be convinced to leave his family, leave his wife, leave his daughter, leave his marriage, after a one hour phone call, I mean, can you even call that person a man?
Starting point is 00:12:57 I don't know why their family is so invested in preserving their family name, it's not Game of Thrones. It's not like they need a strong male to inherit Winterfell. Our next reddit post comes from our Slosh Relationship Advice. I'm a 23 year old woman. I live in an apartment building on the middle floor so there's someone under and above me. I don't really mind the noise. I just tune it out. But about maybe a year ago, the couple below me had a baby. Now, I think it's common knowledge that babies are loud. They cry, they scream, and the parents can't do much about it. I just kind of deal with it. However, my boyfriend, who's 24, isn't quite as accepting. We've been together for about 10 months, and he comes over to my place most nights, even though he has his
Starting point is 00:13:40 own apartment, and I have two roommates. I can only assume that the baby's room is under mine because we can hear him cry very clearly and we can hear his parents talk and sing low advice to calm him down. It's annoying, but it is what it is. For some reason, my boyfriend goes completely nuts about it. Every day, he goes on about how he hopes the baby will finally shut up and how rude it is at the baby cries and how he can't believe that the parents allow him to make noise
Starting point is 00:14:08 like that. He ignores me when I try to tell him that it's just a baby and the parents are doing what they can. I mean, I'm sure they're a lot more annoyed than we are, than at night if he's woken up by the baby crying, which happens almost every night, who wake me up and start complaining about it. I've also told him many times to get earplugs, or if it annoys him so much, we can stay at his apartment sometimes.
Starting point is 00:14:33 But he always says that he doesn't want to give in, whatever that means. Things kind of exploded last night when he once again woke me up in the middle of the night and shouted that he couldn't stand this anymore. He was really angry. I've honestly never seen him like this. He kept saying that I had to deal with this and that he couldn't live like this. I told him to please calm down and he screamed that I had to go shut up the baby.
Starting point is 00:14:58 I said that I didn't know what to do that it wouldn't change anything except to bother the parents. He stopped pacing, looked at me, and said that I obviously care more about a random child than I did about him. I tried to tell him that, no, I love him and I want him to be happy, but he just grabbed his clothes and left, banging every door on his way out. I tried texting and calling him, but he doesn't answer me.
Starting point is 00:15:23 I just don't know what to do. I love him so much, but I feel like he's going overboard. It's a baby. Should I go talk to the parents? I feel like that wouldn't help, but maybe it would calm him down. How do I talk to him about it? I just really need advice on how to deal with all this.
Starting point is 00:15:40 Please help me. And then two weeks later, OP posted an update. Basically, the day after I posted, my boyfriend texted me to say that he was expecting an apology for me. I thought about what you all said about not letting him in my place again, and about how I should be careful, and I told him that I wanted to meet him in a coffee shop away from my apartment. He tried telling me that he would just come to my place, but I stood my ground and said no, I was going to meet him there. When we met, I started by listening to some
Starting point is 00:16:09 advice that I got. I asked him about why the crying baby was bothering him so much, as well as telling him about me so Phonia, AST, OCD, and all the stuff that I was told that he might have. I could see that he was getting annoyed by my questions, so I was trying to be quick, but he was rolling his eyes and tapping his fingers. Once I was done, he just kind of went, that's it, that's all you want to say. I told him I was just trying to understand, because his behavior about the baby wasn't coherent with who I thought that he was. And he very rudely said that we had a bigger problem than a baby if I actually thought that he was crazy like that. I said that I didn't think that he was crazy just that we have to figure out why he's
Starting point is 00:16:51 reacting so intensely to a crying child because if there's no logical reason, it just means that he's incapable of handling himself like a grown-up. I told him that I didn't want that in my life, that I can't have a future with someone who refuses to deal with his issues, and that I wasn't there for him to treat me like garbage. I was ranting and speaking really loudly, and he was just sitting there, staring at me with his mouth open like a fish. I've never spoken to anyone like that in my life.
Starting point is 00:17:19 I think I just read so many comments telling me to grow a spine that I must have started to believe in myself. I felt really, really proud. I'm usually so bad when it comes to saying what I actually think, and this time I did it. I waited for his response for a couple of seconds before asking him what he was thinking. He was breathing really deeply and was bright red, and he said really angrily that I wasn't who he thought I was if I could speak to him that way. He said that I was supposed to love him for who he was and want him without trying to change him. And a bunch of other nonsense about how wrong it was for me to say things like that to him.
Starting point is 00:17:54 At this point, I was done. I was already almost crying because that whole conversation was so hard for me. And his reaction just showed me that he didn't care about me or what I was telling him. I got up and told him that we were done, that I didn't want to speak to him or see him anymore. I think I also said that I deserved better. I left before he could react, which was very dramatic, but I just didn't want to hear him anymore. Since then, I know that he's tried to call me, text me, and come by my place, but I told my roommates that I didn't want to see him and they've been helpful.
Starting point is 00:18:28 He came by two days ago again and banged on the door until my roommates partner told him that we were going to call the cops. That seemed to shut him up to use his own words. Opie, I really think you dodged a bullet on this one. This guy seems to be living his life right on the edge of some kind of like rage-induced breakdown. This guy's raging over a baby, raging over his girlfriend not complaining about the baby, and then raging over his girlfriend having a spine. This guy's just like the incredible Hulk. Just boyfriend smash! That's my secret OP, I'm always angry.
Starting point is 00:19:01 Also, I gotta say, the fact that this guy had his own apartment and he insisted on constantly coming to OPs apartment that kinda makes me think that he was cheating, I mean, it's really weak evidence. It's just, it's a little, it's a little strange. If you have an apartment by yourself and your girlfriend has an apartment with roommates, wouldn't you wanna stay at your place rather than the girlfriend's apartment? Seems kinda obvious to me. That was our slash best of Redditor updates and if you like this content be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit
Starting point is 00:19:31 podcast episodes every single day.

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