rSlash - r/Bestof I Hate My Cheating Mom For Ruining My Life

Episode Date: February 16, 2023

https://www.youtube.com/rslash Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Metrolinx and cross links are reminding everyone to be careful as Eglinton Cross-town LRT train testing is in progress. Please be alert as trains can pass at any time on the tracks. Remember to follow all traffic signals. Be careful along our tracks and only make left turns where it's safe to do so. Be alert, be aware and stay safe. Welcome to our slash best of redditor updates, where O.P.'s cheating mother ruins his life. Our next reddit post comes from our slash am I the bad guy? The title is, will I be the bad guy if I tell my ex-husband my concerns about his girlfriend?

My ex-husband and I are in our early 40s and late 30s and have been divorced for almost 3 years now. While my ex-husband didn't want to get divorced, we separated, and we've been co-parenting our two preteens amicably. He lives within 5 blocks of our old home, and while we have 50-50 custody, our kids freely bounce between our places and choose how they want to spend holidays. We've tried hard to create a sense of stability despite the change in our family situation and have standing tune up therapy twice a year to make sure that we're all comfortable with the arrangements. His recent partner, Maria, who's 29, has been the only

girlfriend to make it past a six month mark. And prior to this encounter, I would say that she makes my ex-husband happy and is a pretty reasonable lady. She has a very sweet and percotious son, who's 9, whom we all adore, and generally, I thought things were going well. I invited Maria to bring her son to my place if she would like to join my kids in private language classes. She accepted, and this has been going on for a few weeks now. My kids adore him. Last week, she said something to me that was surprising. She asked me when I'd be moving my things out so that my ex and her could be able to cohabitate.

I was taken aback and confused, and I asked her to clarify. You mean my current home? This home? And she nonchalantly told me, you don't need all this space for three people. We wouldn't have space at your ex's current condo. Her son looked so embarrassed at this point and I said, oh, this conversation would need to include my ex. My kids and I live in a brownstone that my ex and I purchased together 50-50, but that I've been renovating since before the divorce. My ex lives in a nice condo that's spacious, but is still a little bit of a man cave. Later in the evening, I got a text message from her son who was pleading for me to forgive

his mom, that he's sorry for his mom and to not tell my ex. I feel awful, but I think I should let my ex know this conversation occurred and to let him handle it. Will I be the bad guy if I told my ex-husband my concerns about his girlfriend? Also, OP clarifies that she's the sole owner of this house currently because the ex insisted through the divorce that she keeps it. Also, for some reason, they co-own the condo together. Then, three months later, O.P. posted an update. I procrastinated bringing up what Maria said and basically told myself to assume the best intentions.

My thought process was that it's my home and she'll have to cart me out of here on the back of our hers. I admit, I was also nervous about raining on his happiness and I didn't want to be perceived as a better ex. The kids had a great time at camp and then a month or so later we had family dinner with both sets of grandparents. My ex brought Maria and it started out great. Everyone welcomed Maria and her son. Maria was helping me finish up dessert in the kitchen and I was

getting ready to head back in there when Maria made an off the cuff comment about how she'd host parties here. My ex-husband came in with the kids, overheard and asked, oh did OP offer for you to host here? Then Maria's son just burst into tears and started apologizing. It was genuinely one of the most awkward experiences of my life. Long story short, the entire family learned that my ex had a vasectomy after the divorce, and is not looking to remarry anytime soon. Afterwards, I talked to him about the previous interaction, along with showing him the text messages, and they're no longer together. I'm worried about Maria's son, although I recognize it's not my place. I'm unsure what I can do there. Man, everyone is utterly blasting Maria in the comments, just tearing her up, calling her entitled stupid,

and like, yeah, if this story really is the way that it sounds, then yes, she is super, super entitled. But I have to point out, there's a distinct possibility that she just misunderstands a situation. Also, the ex-husband could be lying to Maria saying that he owns the house when really he doesn't. I mean, I'm not trying to defend Maria because her behavior of just expecting OP to give her her house is pretty unreasonable, extremely unreasonable.

But it's just so bizarre that I have to assume she probably thinks that the husband owns the house, right? That seems probably like a more logical explanation. Maybe he's lying to get into her pants. Maybe she just assumed because she's sexist. Who knows, I think those are probably more likely than her expecting OP to just hand over a house for free. But who knows, man? I've read some stories of some super-entitled people, so maybe she just really is that level of entitled. Actually, down in the comments, we have a similar story from science as my god. My aunt is like this with my mom. When my mom remarried

after her previous husband's death, my aunt just walked in and was like, when are you going to give this to me? No rhyme or reason at all. Started taking things off the wall while my mom's new husband was standing there. It's not my mom's house, so it made no sense. Her husband took everything out of my aunt's hand and kicked her out, permanently. Neither of them were raised this way at all. My grandparents were humble immigrants. Some people just happened to become like this over time. Our next reddit post comes from our slash true off my chest. I'm trapped on a balcony because my

boyfriend's 85 year old stepfather is watching adult videos on an 85 inch TV in the living room. My boy my boyfriend and his mom are out shopping and his stepfather thinks that I'm with them. I'm cowering on the lounge chair so he won't see me. I'm so embarrassed. Then O.P. posted an update. I called my boyfriend. His mother then called the old man and said, please stop, she's on the balcony, and just hung up.

Apparently, she walked in on him doing the same thing yesterday on that giant TV. My lord! Now the man knows that I know which was the last thing I wanted to happen. After the phone call, I stayed on the balcony for 45 more minutes so that I didn't have to look him in the eyes. For what it's worth, I'm a young East Asian female, and the fact that he was watching East Asian adult videos makes me feel even more embarrassed. Oh, one more thing I forgot to mention. According to him, he stayed back to fix the TV. Then, O.P posted another update. My boyfriend's mother had a talk with the old man, and he claimed that he was simply fixing something on the TV. Yeah, fixing! I saw him spending a few minutes straight to browse the options.

Secondly, he questioned, why the hell would someone stay on the balcony when it was cold outside? Well, I had a blanket with me, and it wasn't that cold. The family had dinner together after the incident. I was avoiding eye contact with him the whole time. Unlike his usual grumpy and quiet self, he tried to crack jokes and stuff. I am pretty sure he was trying to get my attention to alleviate the awkwardness.

I'm staying with these people for six more days. God help me. Ah. I can't believe I'm making this joke. Oh no, help me step dad. I'm stuck on the balcony. Tis the season for making memories with family and friends. So celebrate with Swiss Chalets Festive Special, their famous quarter chicken dinner,

now with cranberry sauce, stuffing, linda chocolates, plus a scratch and win card, where everyone's a winner. It's a tradition truly worth sharing. The Festive Special, only at Swiss Chal LA. Visit swishallay.ca for contest details while supplies last. Our next reddit post comes from our slash relationship advice. I'm a 16 year old male. I have two sisters, ages 10 and 8. Our biological father was never in our lives. He left my mom when she was pregnant with me, then came back six years later and said that he wanted to make amends and that we could be a happy family. Somehow, my mom immediately started saying that she loved him, but he left after mom got pregnant again. Then, two

years later, he came back. I cried and begged my mom to not let him into our lives because I hated him. Well, he said the same thing. My mom also said that she loved him, and then he left after she got pregnant again. My mom was a waitress, so the four of us lived in a small one-bedroom apartment. I was essentially another parent to my sisters because mom was always working. Sometimes we wouldn't eat breakfast or dinner because we couldn't afford it. Other times I didn't need anything so that my sisters could eat. My mom met another man, a 45-year-old guy a year after my younger sister was born. He's a really good man. His wife and daughter died in

an accident a long time ago when he was in his 20s. He met my mom when he was ready to date again. He's a really good man and treated us like his own kids and I consider him my father. He was very wealthy and owned multiple businesses. We eventually moved into his huge mansion like house. I also had a better school there. We three siblings got our own rooms and I got better clothes, played video games for the first time in my life, and a bunch of other things. He taught me things, helped me catch up in school because I couldn't

do well in my previous school. He spent a lot of time with the three of us. My sister's eventually started calling him dad. I followed shortly after. I remember him crying, hugging us, and saying that he loved us when we called him dad for the first time. They eventually got married, and dad asked me to be one of his groomsmen, and of course, I said yes while my sister were my mom's bridesmaids. My mom was a stay-at-home mom who took care of us. As far as I know, they were happy together. They went on dates at least once every two weeks, kissed each other frequently, and always

told each other that they loved each other. He also knew about my mom's past, and realized that she had issues and got her into counseling. I was really happy that my mom had finally found someone who treated her well. I was also really happy for myself and my siblings and really loved him. He also said that he would pay for college for the three of us. Well, last year, Dad discovered that my mom was having an affair with his best friend, who was also the best man at their wedding. Apparently, the affair was going on for a long time. I don't know exactly how long. My mom cried and begged him to give her another chance.

He didn't understandably. He let us keep all of her new things, such as clothes for me and toys for my sister. When I went to him crying and asking him why he was leaving us, he just hugged me and told me about my mom's affair. He said that the affair is too painful, that he can't be in this marriage anymore, and that he loved me and my sisters. My sisters don't know about the affair. I don't think they'll understand. They had a prenup, so mom didn't get anything that wasn't hers. My dad just had to pay her rent in a new apartment until the divorce was finalized. We stayed in a decent apartment, but after the divorce was over, we moved to a much smaller apartment. I tried to stay in contact with him, but it doesn't seem like he wants a

relationship with me. He's never responded to my messages. I sent a final letter to him last year in December, thanking him for everything he did for me and my sisters, and that I loved him, and that I would remember him forever. So now we're back in a one-bedroom apartment, skipping meals and barely being able to afford anything. I sleep on the floor now. My sisters share a bit while my mom uses another. Mom is weight-dressing again.

I've also taken a part-time job at a grocery store to help with money. I just hate my mom so much right now. I only took that job to help with money. I just hate my mom so much right now. I only took that job to help my sisters. I have also stopped talking to mom. Recently she came crying to me and told me that she was sorry for ruining everything and that she wanted me to talk to her. I broke down and said, I don't understand. Why did you cheat on him? He was taking such good care of you and the three of us. He was also going to send us to college. For the first time in my life, I was happy and you destroyed my life.

Why do you always have to ruin everything? You already did that twice when you let my biological father back in my life. I hate you. I never want to talk to you again. She was crying a lot after I said that. I'll admit, what I said was pretty rude, but at the same time, I was just so angry. Then about a month later, OP makes another post. About two weeks ago, I found my mom did in our house. She had sent my siblings to their friends house, and then hit herself.

She really changed after she got divorced from my stepdad after she cheated on him. My mom and I didn't talk a lot after that. One of the last things I told her was that I hated her, and I asked her why she ruined my and my sister's lives. I wish I hadn't said that. Maybe she would still be alive if I supported her. I've had no contact with my stepdad after the divorce. My sisters and I live with my mom's sister and her husband now. We've never met them before this, and even my mom never had contact with them, but they're the only family that could be found, and they agreed to let us live with them. My siblings and I don't like living here. Both of them are constantly shouting at each other and at us.

We're just so uncomfortable here. I don't think they can afford food for all of us. I have a job at a grocery store, so I'm mostly by food for my siblings. My boss is also very nice and allows me to take home some extra things for free. I really miss my mom. My sisters are also always crying for her. She had her flaws, but I still love her. She's my mom. The last thing I told her was that I hated her. I just wished that I had told her that I love her

and supported and helped her. Then she would have been alive today. What I told her, tipped her over the edge. I can't do any of this anymore. I don't know anything anymore. I was not expecting that turn in this story. Uh, gosh, I probably wouldn't have read this story if I knew where this was going. That's rough, O.P. I think the best thing you can do is try to just focus on the fact that your mom's decisions are her decisions. She's the one who got pregnant three times.

She's the one who cheated on her husband, and she's the one who decided to do what she did at the end. I think it's human nature for kids to blame themselves whenever bad things happen with their parents, but that's just not the reality here, OP. You didn't do this to her. She's the one who made her choices. I think she was depressed because she ruined her life, because yeah, she had everything, and she threw

it all away.