rSlash - r/Bestof I'm Attracted to Cockroaches

Episode Date: January 1, 2026

0:00 Intro 0:09 Roach love 8:41 Plus size Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to R-slash Best of Redditor Updates, where O.P. is deeply attracted to cockroaches. Our next Reddit post comes from R-slash Today I Eapt Up. Today I effed up by admitting to my girlfriend that I pretend she's a giant cockroach when we passionately hug. Ever since I was a teenager, I've had very intense fantasies about passionately hugging a giant cockroach. It started in 9th or 10th grade when we read the metamorphosis by Franz Kafka. As I started to think more and more about the roach creature that the character had become,

I started to imagine what it would be like if a woman turned into the roach instead. I found this idea very arousing. I wouldn't be repulsed or frightened of her, as the characters in the story are. I would take care of her. Then, my thoughts started to get sexual with the character. Eventually, I sort of dropped the bit about her having been a human woman first, and I kind of imagine this fictionalized roach species. They're giant roaches, the size of a person, and have complete intelligence.

I kind of over time conjured up an imaginary friend of sorts. She was one of those roaches, and her name was Agtha. I would fantasize about her often. Whenever I had some fun alone time, I would imagine elaborate scenarios of me and Agtha passionately hugging. When I started doing it with actual women, I found that I couldn't, uh, perform if I wasn't thinking of Agtha. So basically now, anytime I do it, I'm pretending that the woman is actually Agtha.

Not just thinking about Agtha, I concentrate intently to visualize that I'm actually doing Agtha. I don't want to think about the actual human girl at all. There's only Agtha. Of course, real passionate hugging can never be as exciting as my fully imaginary sessions with Aktha. There are things that her multiple appendages and her antennae allow for that a human woman can never match. So anyways, I've been in a relationship with a real human girlfriend for about a year. Three or four times, I've tried to passionately hug her and not pretend that she's Agtha. But I just

can't do it. So every time we do it, I'm imagining my girlfriend is Agtha. I finally confided this to her the other day, and I was blown away by her reaction. I thought she might take it a bit badly at first, but that she would get used to it. No, I have never seen such a look of disgust before. Outraged is not an understatement. She's not even returning my text now. I'm afraid she's actually going to break up with me, and also that she's going to tell people about Agtha.

I don't know how I'll face anyone. This is going to sound silly, but I also feel guilty about feeling shame, as if Agtha would be saddened by this, even though I know she's. imaginary. I just don't know what to do at this point. Then, five years later, OP posted an update. In the five years that have passed since the topic was posted, I decided to stop fooling myself and just commit to the love of Aktha. I know she's not real, per se, but in my head, she's an actual personality. And I'm in love with that personality. I don't care if she's a roach, or if she's imaginary. The love is real. Call me deluded, but it's harmless, and it makes me

happy. I haven't had a real girlfriend again since the incident five years ago, but occasionally I've had one-night stands via online apps. And on these times, I always envisioned the woman is Agtha, my sensual roach queen. Now, I mean no offense to the women, of course, and even a gentleman once or twice. I just envisioned their Ogtha, and no, ha ha, I've never confided to them about it. I learned my lesson. The thing about it, though, is that I became so in love with my Agtha that I became so in love with my Ogtha that I married her. I even did a little ceremony in my living room. I recited my own vows, and she recited hers. I even went on a honeymoon, which technically you could say was a solo vacation to New Orleans for a week. But in my mind, Aktha was with me the entire time. In my mind, I think of her as my

wife. Now, here's where I messed up. I got so used to thinking of her as my wife in my head that a few months ago at work, I nonchalantly said, my wife, in some innocuous sentence. I think it was something like, oh yeah, me and my wife loved that show in regards to chopped. So now, everyone was asking me about my wife, because they'd never heard I was married or even dating someone. Everyone kept pestering me, wanting to know about her, wanting to see pictures. I became full of panic. I did the one thing I swore I would never do again. I talked to other people about Agtha in real life. We were at a team lunch and I just let it all spill out. I told them about how I became enamored as a teenager with the Franz Kafka story, how my fantasy involved into an

actual imaginary entity with a personality, and how I slowly began to grow in love with her. What started as a mere romantic attraction to giant roaches blossomed into a whirlwind romance and that she became the love of my life, even though her existence was in my own mind. At first, they thought that I was doing a creepy joke, but I convinced them I was telling the truth. Well, they were afraid and disgusted. I've been a pariah at work ever since. Everybody steers clear of me. We used to have a good social life. Now, people only speak to me for work-related reasons. Even working virtually now, nobody sends me a slack message unless it's about work. I even heard a rumor that people went to HR, but they were, of course, told nothing

could be done. I've lost my good work friends because of this, and it is indeed jeopardizing my career, because my bosses think I'm insane. I've ruined my friendships and future career prospects due to my honesty. I'm thinking of starting to look for a new job, although it's difficult in the current environment. I can start fresh elsewhere, though. No matter what, I'll be staying with my wife, Agtha. For me, it's Agtha forever. If you must know, I do hope that even if I'm an old man, that one day the technology is invented to extract the Agtha personality from my mind and implant it into a real external body, either of a genetically engineered or a mechanical nature, and me and Agtha can then experience genuine physical connection. But if she must remain within me, that's fine. Her love

keeps me warm on the coldest of nights. Then one year after that, OP posted another update. I thought my parents had a right to know. Last evening, I revealed to them everything about Agtha, and I told them that we were married. I even allowed Agtha to speak through me to them so that she could finally meet my parents after only seeing them from afar. I knew my parents would find it unusual at first, but I thought they would come to understand and be happy for me. However, I fear they think me deranged. My mother actually cried, and not tears of happiness as I expected. They even encouraged me to seek counseling. I explain to them what I'm experiencing is real, and I encourage them to read through my original Reddit posts. It's created a very bad situation for me now,

and I fear that my relationship with my parents is quite ruined. They keep insisting I seek counseling, and are threatening if I don't, they'll no longer assist with my student loans, and will not be welcome at Thanksgiving. I feel they're overreacting, but at the same time, I wish I had just kept my marriage a secret. I do now believe that I screwed up being truthful with my parents. They are in some ways traditionalists and are simply not ready to understand how entities can exist without physical form and share a mind.

It breaks my heart, but I wish I'd been deceitful with my family. For the record, I will never divorce Aktha, and with our love, I know I can survive anything, but I wish I'd never been truthful with my parents. I don't know what's weirder in this story, story, the whole in love with a giant cockroach named Agha thing, or the fact that this guy keeps telling people that he's married to a giant cockroach named Agtha, expecting them to be

cool with it. The top post from Lady Kaliwobbles. Out of all the absolute burning questions I have, when he allowed Agtha to speak through him to them, did she speak in human or like clicking noises or whatever sounds a cockroach makes? I can't sleep. Our next Reddit post is from R slash relationship advice. I have a small group of people I consider my best friends that I've known all my life. Their names are Beth, Stacey, and Gwen. Of the three, only Gwen is married and or in a relationship. I'm a big girl, 5'3, 260 pounds.

I've always had issues with my weight and had self-esteem issues. I was always told, you have such a beautiful face, and if you were smaller, I would date you. I've been in a few relationships where it was obvious that my boyfriends at the time were ashamed to be seen with me. They would never hold my hand in public and never post pictures of us together on Instagram or Facebook. My luck on dating apps consisted of getting ghosted

or just wanting intercourse and I'm embarrassed to say that I allowed myself to be used by some guys. Eventually, I stopped responding to most messages. Three years ago, I met my fiancé, Kyle, at one of my nephew's soccer games. Kyle was the coach and approached me afterwards. He asked me if I was ever going to reply to his message.

I was confused, and he said he messaged me a week prior and answered a question I had on my plenty of fish profile. That's when I remembered his message, and I got embarrassed. I told him that I'd been busy, and he asked me if I had any plans for later that night. My sister and nephew both liked him and had told me as much. I agreed and exchanged numbers with him, even though I felt that he was out of my league. Kyle is average-sized and in shape. To this day, I don't know why he didn't walk out on me on that date. I got it in my head that he was only after intercourse and might have some big girl fetish. We met up for an early dinner at a casual Mexican restaurant and within five minutes I asked him, are you just looking for a hookup because you have a thing for fat girls? He shook

his head and told me he was interested because of things I listed on my profile, like how I like soccer, my favorite wine, TV shows, and that my photos I posted showed that I like to travel. He led most of the conversation and tried to get me to open up and ask questions. He would gently touch my hand from time to time and tried flirting. Somehow, he asked to see me again, and the second date went a lot better. I found out he was a widower who lost his wife and two-month-old son in a car crash a decade before. He had tried dating off and on for a few years, but nothing serious came of it. He worked in the field I got my degree in, but with no luck getting hired into. Within three months, we were officially boyfriend and girlfriend. My friends and family were thrilled,

and his family welcomed me in, even his former in-laws, who he still considered family. All except for my friend, Beth. Beth, when I told her, kept asking me if I was sure about him. She asked if he wasn't just using me for intercourse, which had yet to happen. Then it was, well, he probably doesn't want to have intercourse with you. When I mentioned that he holds my hand in public and would pull me just a bit closer to him when we would go out for ranks when guys would walk towards us, suddenly it was, he's controlling. Eventually, Kyle met my three best friends, and they all liked him immediately, and Beth said that he was a keeper. He helped me get hired at another company in my field, starting at $70,000 plus benefits after I politely

declined an opportunity to work alongside him. I say all this because since Kyle has come into my life, he's shown me nothing but love, affection, grace, and kindness. He's also helped me start to get past my insecurities. I was over 300 pounds when I met him, and now I'm 260. My initial fears of being some fetish of his are gone, and he's been there in every way I could ever want. A few days ago, we hosted a dinner with Beth, Stacey, Gwyn, and her husband. Kyle and Gwen's husband, Mike, had become friends, and they did all the cooking and cleanup. Everything was going well, and we were all relaxing on the back porch drinking some cocktails when Beth asked me in front of everyone. Why do you tolerate that picture of Kyle with his dish?

wife and son. I was absolutely mortified. Kyle looked upset, but was keeping his composure. I explained that it was the only picture he had of the three of them together and that I would never ask him to hide it because that was his wife and son. That he loved them and that I know Kyle loves me and that she was being rude and she needed to call an Uber to leave. She obviously had too much to drink and didn't seem like she wanted to leave. Then she absolutely embarrassed me when she brought up a humiliation I'd endured with an ex during the lowest period of my life that I hadn't told Kyle about. I bet keeping the picture up was his idea and you went along with it just like when Jeff would make you wear a pig mask and oink while he banged you. Kyle absolutely exploded on her

and yelled that she had to get the F out of my house. Mike and Gwen had to drag a now crying Beth out with Stacy following them. When they left, I just started bawling and looked at Kyle and started to repeat that I was sorry, and if he didn't want me anymore, I understood. All my insecurities that I worked so hard to overcome came flooding back. He just hugged me and kissed the top of my head and told me that what I did before doesn't bother him. It was Beth humiliating me that pissed him off. He told me that it's up to me if I remained friends with her, but he doesn't want to be around Beth anymore. He cleaned up the patio and held me as I fell asleep crying. Today, I texted Beth that we needed to talk. We met up for brunch, and she was very embarrassed about her behavior, but I told her I don't think I can be friends.

She then started to blame Kyle for our friendship ending and that he was messed up in the head for making you look at his dead wife and kid. Don't throw away our friendship over him. I got up and paid for my food and left. Gwen and Stacy don't want to be in the middle, but agree that Beth was in the wrong and that they're happy that I found the love of my life and hope one day things will return to normal. I told them that I won't be upset if they hang out with Beth. but I don't want to be included if she's with them. They were fine with that. Beth was my first friend and someone I always looked up to. She held me as I cried when my first boyfriend left me a week after I lost my virginity to him

because he was dared to date me and sleep with me. Now I'm wavering about wanting to give her another chance. We have so much history and amazing memories. Kyle said that he would support me either way, but he was a hard no on being around Beth outside our wedding if I wanted her. there. I'm so torn on what to do because she was drunk, but still she said those words and they cut me to the core. Should I forgive her or cut her out of my life? Opie, I've read some really nasty stories involving really terrible people across the over 1,000 videos on this channel.

And what she said to you has got to be one of the top 10 nastiest things I've ever heard someone saying these stories. For me, there'd be no coming back from this. Then the next day, O.P. Posted an update. Thank you everyone for the kind words and for helping me realize that Beth doesn't care about me. I'm hurt, sad, angry, and actually pity the woman that Beth became. Somewhere along the way, the seven-year-old Beth that stood up for me when kids would make fun of me and would share the snacks her mom packed for her, died, and I'll mourn the loss of that Beth. Now I have to go crawl into bed and cuddle with my man. Down in the comments, I'm going to read this reply from Katerina because it has a cool saying that I've never heard before. In my country, we say

the snake gets closer before it attacks. Never think that just because someone is close to you, it means they have the best intentions towards you. Trust, but never trust blindly. And by the way, this saying comes from Brazil. That's honestly a pretty cool saying. I may have to tuck that one away for later. That was our slash best of Redditor updates. And if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day. Thank you.