rSlash - r/Bestof I'm Divorcing My Husband Over Mustard

Episode Date: January 28, 2023

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Welcome to our slash best of redditor updates, where OP gets a divorce over mustard. Our next reddit post comes from our slash relationship advice, and the title is, My husband can't accept that I don't like mustard. Things came to a head yesterday. We've been married for two years, dating five. We're both 34. I'm a woman, and he's a man, if it matters. I am not a picky eater. In fact, I'm quite

adventurous and every time that I've traveled, I've always made it a point to try dishes with unusual or uncommon ingredients to say that I've tried them. There are very few foods that I won't eat. One of them is mustard, like the condiments. I do not like it. I just don't. The taste is very strong and overpowering, and it's an unpleasant taste. I've tried yellow, stone ground, honey, artisan, brown, spicy, you name it. I've tried them all, and I just don't like them. My husband, for some reason, never understood this. He loves mustard, especially honey mustard. He puts it on all of his sandwiches and dips his fries in it. And every time he tries to force me to try it, he'll insist that I'll

like it this time. I'm a grown woman, I know what I don't like and I don't like mustard. So I'll say no, and it'll devolve into a mini argument where he calls me picky. Well, last night, we were on the road home from a weekend trip that we took together, and he stopped at a gas station to get us a quick bite. He got a hot dog and slathered it and mustard. I got a hot dog too, but decided to keep it plain. I don't really love hot dogs to begin with, but I'll eat them. While we waited in line, he asked what I got on mine, and I told him nothing. He actually got furious and grabbed my hot dog from me. He marched over to the condomin station and began putting mustard on my hot dog, telling

me to grow up and stop being picky. I just walked out and sat in the car. I didn't even want the freaking hot dog anymore. My appetite was gone. He came back and began screaming at me for embarrassing him even further. The word divorce was said for the first time ever. I secretly recorded his screaming because I was genuinely afraid that I would die. He was driving radically, swwerving and speeding. I'm in a hotel tonight. He ignored me all day at work, and then the call started when he realized that I wasn't

coming home. Non-stop voicemails and text messages. He sent me a screenshot of a Google search for local divorce lawyers. I haven't eaten all day and I've been sobbing in this hotel room. I don't want to get divorced and I wish that I had just ate that effing mustard. Someone anyone please give me an explanation. Am I in danger? Why would he react this way to a preference of mine? I'm completely broken right now. Then OP answers some questions down in the comments.

Uh, okay. I can't read this paragraph, so I'm gonna be vague, and I'm gonna let you guys kind of imagine what was said here. People ask OP if her husband is this forceful with other things in their relationship, and OP clarifies that, um, romantically speaking, sometimes he will want her to do things that she doesn't want to do, and he keeps asking and asking and asking over and over until it eventually becomes like a fight between them. Then, five days later, OP posted an update. My husband found the hotel where I was staying. I guess he followed me from work. He was waiting for me in the lobby. God, my heart skipped a beat, and I realized that I did NOT miss him at all.

I was afraid of making a scene, so I sat with him in the lounge area and talked. I pointed out the hotel security camera and I said that if he tried to hurt me, there would be footage, and I would press charges without a second thought. He was completely shocked and said that he would never hurt me. I reminded him how I feared for my life in the car. He ignored me. He asked why I wasn't coming home. I was completely blank faced when I told him, because you're divorcing me.

He said that he didn't mean it that way and he was just upset. I said, when normal people are upset, they express it in a healthy way. You threatened to end our marriage, so I'm taking you seriously. He got pissed and asked me if I was saying that he wasn't normal. Honestly, I just wanted the conversation to be done, so I told him that if that's really all he heard, then there's no point in talking anymore. I told him that I was looking for a lawyer, and he should probably do the same if he hasn't found one. He lashed out and said, oh this over one mistake, and I just stared at him. As I started to stand up, he grabbed my wrist hard, and I pointed at the camera again. This just made him angrier. He never could handle slights to his ego. I told him, one mistake?

This was it one mistake? This was a pattern of abuse over years. It was threatening me, intimidating me. I told him that if he tried contacting me again, beyond sending me his lawyer's details, I'd be calling the cops. He let me go. I wish I could say that I was a badass who celebrated in my room, but I just collapsed onto my bed and began sobbing. I was just so sick and angry and

sad. He truly doesn't care about me. I've been crying on and off while calling local therapists. In the span of a month, my life is completely changed, and my husband isn't remorseful at all. He just thinks it's all my fault. Then, about two weeks later, around Thanksgiving, OP posted another update. OP mentions that she found a divorce lawyer, and she's taking steps to make sure that she's safe. Then she continues. Earlier this week, the calls and texts really ramped up.

My lawyer advised me to leave him unblocked but muted so that his messages would come through. I read a few since I was curious. He wanted me at Thanksgiving dinner with his family. He begged me to stop being this way, and what was he supposed to tell his family? Well, Thanksgiving came and went. I had bought a couple of ready meals the night before, so that was my feast. I guess my absence at my husband's Thanksgiving

dinner forced my husband to tell his family that I was separated from him. So, Friday morning, I got a phone call from an unfamiliar number. I answered it. It was my mother-in-law. She begged me not to hang up on her, so I stayed on the line. She went on about how I was her daughter, she loved me, her son loved me, and how could I leave him over something so minor. My husband only told his mother about the mustard. And even then, it was a watered down version that made me look like a neurotic control freak who needed everything done my way.

According to my mother-in-law, my husband got a little side cup of mustard for me and asked me to just try it in the car. Then I started screaming that I would divorce him. She then started probing me about which lawyer I was seeing and what I told them. She also reminded me that lying in court was a crime. My lawyer had warned me not to reveal anything that we had discussed to his family. It took all my willpower not to say anything. Instead, I hung up and muted her number two. She hasn't texted or tried to call again.

Trust me, I would have loved to send her the recording of her son's screaming, saying that he ought to smack me, calling me a stubborn B word, that he would divorce me, and that he would run the car off the f-pping Road if I didn't start acting right. I wanted to scream into the phone that her precious son started this mess and I was simply doing what he wanted. I've come to realize that you don't treat someone you love the way that he has. Normal people do not act this way. There's something seriously wrong with that man.

He texted me last night calling me a B word for making his mother cry. He also said that he would come find me and that it would take more than a locked door to keep him from getting me and taking me home. I forwarded those messages to my lawyer. I know this isn't a happy update, but things are moving along quite nicely. Well OP, I guess you could say that your husband couldn't cut the mustard. This is kind of a funny story for me to read, because I'm going through a mustard journey of self-discovery myself.

When I was a kid, I didn't like mustard on anything, and then, like, as an adult, I like tolerated mustard, it's okay. But now, recently, I don't know what happened to my brain or my tongue or what, but now I can't get enough mustard. Someone got me like a gift basket type thing. And then it was like a jar of whole grain mustard. And man, that stuff was so good, I was putting it on everything. And it even got to the point.

And it even got to the point where I just got a spoon, got a scoop of mustard and just ate a scoop of mustard. And I was like, yo, what the hell? I used to hate mustard, now it's delicious. So I guess what I'm saying is, maybe we should give your husband a break. Maybe the way he reacted was completely reasonable. No, I'm joking obviously. He's a nutso that behavior is completely inexcusable. It's just, I'm kind of discovering that I have a passion for mustard that I didn't know about. I feel like the trend with me is that the older I get, the more I like mustard, so I guess

if I make it to like the age of 70, I'll probably be taking baths in giant bathtubs of mustard. Our next reddit post comes from R-slash Am I the bad guy? Am I the bad guy for refusing to wear a disgusting, ugly sweater to Christmas dinner with my boyfriend despite it being a family tradition. My boyfriend and I have been dating for a few months and he invited me to meet his family for the first time for Christmas dinner. According to him, it's his and his brother's family tradition to make new partners wear an ugly Christmas sweater of their choosing as a right of passage for entering the family.

At first, I thought the concept was cute. I had imagined things like Santa getting stuck in a chimney, lights, spells, etc. But when they mailed me the sweater, my jaw dropped. It was probably the most vulgar Christmas sweater I've ever seen. Without getting into it, let's just say that Santa was making gestures and participating in an act that was not okay for kids to see. Personally, I thought that it was gross, and it was bad enough that if someone at work saw me wear it, I would definitely get in trouble.

I told my boyfriend that in no way would I wear this, but he said that I was being a wet blanket and unsupportive of his family tradition. I said that I would wear any other sweater and would even pay for one myself, but he just called me a spoil sport. I do love my boyfriend, so I actually considered wearing it and asking people to not take photos as a compromise. But the day of the party, I decided to not wear it last minute.

I had to drive there separately from work. So as a result, my boyfriend didn't know about this prior. When his brother opened the door, he eyed me up and down, and I could tell that he wasn't happy that I didn't wear the sweater. My boyfriend was really pissed when he saw me, and we argued in the guest room for a little bit. His brother's teased me for being uptight, and I could tell the jokes embarrassed my boyfriend. I ended up leaving the party early without my boyfriend, and we've been fighting by a

text since. Now, I'm thinking that I was the bad guy for taking the joke too seriously. Alright, down in the comments, people are unsurprisingly say that OP is not the bad guy here. Then OP posted an update. My boyfriend and I got in one final fight where he nagged me to apologize to each of his brothers separately. I told my boyfriend that if he wore this sweater to our friend's miss party of about 15 people, then I'd apologize.

He immediately freaked out and said no and tried to argue they wouldn't understand because it's not their tradition. I explained that this had nothing to do with tradition, but rather with my personal comfort level and whether or not the sweater was an appropriate article of clothing. I asked him why he felt uncomfortable wearing that sweater in front of friends and he refused to answer. He froze up and that's when I realized that he and I weren't going to work out.

He knew that it was inappropriate, and he himself refused to wear it in public. But he was too stubborn to apologize and be on my side. I told him it wasn't going to work out, so I guess I'm going into the New Year single as a Pringle. A few of our friends found out about the breakup, and this might have made me the bad guy, but I sent in the photo of this sweater and explained what happens. I am also glad to know that even people in real life were grossed out. I don't know what will happen with this friendship with those people, but it's none of my business

at this point. Thanks guys, and happy holidays. Yeah OP, I'm on your side on this one. I'm giving you 0 out of 5 bad guys and I'm giving your boyfriend 1.5 out of 5 bad guys. Your ex-boyfriends tradition was less of a tradition and more just plain humiliation. Our next Reddit post comes from our Slosh Relationship Advice. I'm a 23 year old guy and I was dating my ex a 23 year old woman up until a month ago. We were together for four years before that. Before we broke up, she was acting distant for like a month. Then as of last month, she sat me down and asked for an open relationship.

The minute those words came out of her mouth, I broke up with her. I came into this relationship expecting a monogamous relationship, and now she wanted to change the relationship. I only want to be with one person. If we can't agree on that, then I see no future with her. With the way that she was acting before this, I can't trust her. And even if she wasn't acting shady, I wouldn't be able to trust her anyway for suggesting it.

Those were some of the reasons I decided to break up with her in that moment, even though it might seem harsh. In my opinion, if someone wants a relationship like that, their relationship should start like that for it to be healthy, not just dumped on your partner after years of monogamy. Now I've been getting texts and voicemails from her crying to take her back, and that she didn't mean it. I'm not sure what to think. Some people have been telling me that I acted too rash and I didn't even give us time

to work it out and that it was cruel of me to do that. Is this something I acted too quick with or not? Then one month later, OP posted an update. After I posted, I had a suspicion that my girlfriend cheated on me. I couldn't get the nagging feeling out of my head. I didn't want to know it first, but I decided to go digging and ask mutual friends what my accident had been up to that month that she was acting shady. I didn't expect one of her closest friends to spill the beans, but she did.

My suspicions were correct. She had been cheating on me with the mutual friend's cousin. I decided to message the guy on Facebook. When I messaged him, he wanted to meet in person so I met him at a local pub. When I got there, he apologized and explained everything. How he didn't know that she was in a relationship and the day that she called me wanting me back is a day that he found out and broke it off. I can't fault the guy, he seemed genuine and really apologetic. On the plus side, I drink for free the entire time. He seems like a great guy, especially considering how he broke it off right away once he knew. I won't

lie, he's a handsome and a great guy, and I would let him passionately hug me just to rub it in my ex's face, lol, but at least I have a bit of closure now. I've blocked my ex on everything, and I'm gathering the stuff that she left here to mail it to her so she doesn't come knocking. It's taking a lot of willpower not to leave a note in the box along the lines of. Mark seems nice. Too bad you lost him, too. Yet another thread where I went an open relationship turns into, oh, I've been cheating. Whoops!

Tail is old as time, man. That was our slash best of Redditor updates, and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast, because I put out new Reddit Podcast episodes every single day.