rSlash - r/Bestof My Boyfriend Found Out I'm Mega-Rich

Episode Date: May 18, 2024

0:00 Intro 0:11 Money 4:05 Art 10:11 Change at 40 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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how to filter whiskey through charcoal for a smoother taste, one drop at a time. This is one of many sounds in Tennessee with a story to tell. To hear them in person, plan your trip at TNVacation.com. Tennessee sounds perfect. Welcome to r slash best of redditor updates where a guy finds out that his girlfriend is very, very, very rich. Our next reddit post comes from r slash relationships.

I'm a 28 year old woman and my boyfriend is 28. My boyfriend found out how much money I have. He wants me to buy a house for us as well as a new car and fund a trip for him to go abroad. Should I end it? I want to make it clear that I've always spent money on my boyfriend, buying him nice things and whatnot. He got his PlayStation 4 and a new gaming PC because of me.

However, my boyfriend found out that I have a good amount of money and has started to be quite weird about it. Several times he's referred to my money as our money and using our money to buy him the luxury car that he's dreamt of having. He wants us to move out of separate apartments and get a house together and has said that instead of getting him a small Christmas gift, I should fund a trip for him to see Europe. I'm from Italy and have family in Bulgaria, Croatia and the Netherlands and he's from

Canada. So as for buying the luxury car, it's less whether I can afford it and more that seems like something you get your husband or your wife, not your boyfriend of three years. The house I can understand if we're engaged or something. But we aren't though. Yeah, he's talked about marriage several times in the past few months though. And finally, yes, I can afford a trip for both of us to tour Europe. But whereas it's something I might have thought for us to do before, he only brought this up after finding out that I do have the money to pay for it. Is this reason enough to break up with him?

Then 12 days later, OP posted an update. So I didn't automatically dump my boyfriend. I decided to have a talk with him. I told him that it was basically really damn inappropriate to find out that I have money and then start making demands. I told him I have no problem using my finances for our relationship, but that he shouldn't automatically expect that I'm going to put out money on very expensive things for him just because. He seemed very ashamed and agreed that it was a really awful thing to do and he got

carried away and a bit too excited. I told him I understood that, but to do that was very disrespectful to me in the time that we've shared together because it made me feel like all of a sudden my money is what mattered. For a while, everything seemed to be okay. Then, the other day, we were having a minor argument over something that turned into a bigger argument. And he said something along the lines of, well, you don't even want to use what you have for us so maybe you've never even f-ing cared about me. He got really quiet as though he knew that was an awful thing to say and we didn't talk until two days later. I was really angry. I was going to talk things through with him. However, then came

the relationship fatality. He told a couple of people that we're friends with, despite me asking him to keep the money quiet, that I was really rich and that I could afford tons of stuff. How'd I find this out? Well, Saturday we all went out drinking together. He got a bit too much alcohol in his system and ordered an expensive bottle of wine. One of our friends was like, who orders that stuff? We're good with our beers and that's way too expensive. Then my boyfriend piped up and was like, no, it's good. OP is really rich. She can pick up our tab tonight.

Cue several other people who I've never told about my family's money suddenly grilling me on why I've never trusted them enough to tell them about my money. And oh, I thought that we were friends, that kind of thing. I broke up with my boyfriend the next day. I could have moved past what he said the other day when we were arguing, but to tell people I specifically asked him not to, something I trusted him with so much, yeah, I've lost a 3 year relationship and I'm probably going to lose friends as well. Also if you're curious, I checked the comments and OP did NOT pay for the very expensive bottle of wine. She just walked out instead. So good for her.

You know, it's kind of a sad story because if they were together for three years, then clearly this guy was into her for like genuine reasons. But the way he reacted when he found out about the money clearly shows that he just saw her as his meal ticket from that point on. Our next Reddit post comes from r slash marriage. My husband considers himself an art connoisseur when he's not. He filled his home office in the hallway with his collection, which he inherited from his grandfather.

The problem is that his grandfather got scammed and most of the paintings, statuettes and artifacts are fakes or reproductions. Very few are real pieces. My husband knows this, but he liked the art as a kid so he kept it, adding stuff to it over the years. He always bought fakes as well, saying that he likes how they look and he wouldn't bankrupt us that way. To be honest, I couldn't stand that assortment of random knickknacks, especially because they aren't worth a thing. His hallway and office look like a kid's idea of a museum. He was away on a trip two weeks ago, and I seized the occasion to put all the stuff in

storage and give a restyling to his office. I figured he'd get upset, but eventually accept it. When he came back, he became silent. I reassured him that I didn't throw away any of his knickknacks, just put them in storage and that I liked his room much better now and that his grandmother should have done the same thing for his grandfather. He said that the rest of the house is already in my style and he accepted it, but the office and hallway were his space.

I reassured him that he would like it better with time, but a week passed and he looks depressed. He stops spending time in his room, barely talks to me and even refuses intimacy. He acts indifferent and told me that I can get rid of the few things that I kept. I'm starting to think that I overstepped. Did I make a mistake? I'm considering apologizing and getting his stuff back to the office. Then OP posts an update.

Hey guys, I know that I effed up big time and your comments just reinforced that feeling. I went to my husband, gave him a massive apology and told him I would really like to get back his collection and get his office and hallway like they were before. I also apologized for going behind his back and violating his safe space the way that I did. I also offered to let him display some pieces in our bedroom and living room, and the next time he spots something that he would like to add to his collection, I'm paying for it.

He accepted my apology and forgave me. We spent the entire afternoon getting his stuff back in place. It's just not worth it to create a rift between us for this. I might not like his taste in art, but I love this man, and if he's happy, I'm happy too. Then, a couple weeks happy, I'm happy too. Then a couple weeks later OP posted an update. I saw my story on TikTok and I discovered that it's been shared across Reddit and that many people commented.

I read all the comments and they got me thinking about our marriage and how it's starting to mirror the one that my parents have. My mother has always been very controlling with my father. She's what people would call a one-tone nag, always moaning and complaining about something. And this is the main reason that I keep my distance from her. My father is a quiet man who avoids all conflict, and my husband is kind of like him. Now I'm realizing that I'm becoming exactly like my mother. I admit that I didn't outright throw away my husband's stuff

because part of me knew that if I did, it would have done damage that couldn't be repaired. But I still do many little things that my mother would do, like swapping the clothes that he picks in the morning with ones that I think would look better. Or I suggest to him what he should post on social media or put as a profile picture on WhatsApp. I had a long conversation with my husband and asked him how he really feels about my behaviors. He says that he's mostly fine with them, but sometimes I can be too intense. I asked him to elaborate and he admitted that sometimes I can be suffocating.

He said that sometimes I even do this when we're sleeping, like I'll spread my legs on top of him and weigh him down so that he can't move." I admit, I teared up listening to all this. And although he assured me that he's not even thinking about leaving me, I don't want to make him miserable like my father is. I asked if I should go to therapy to try to mitigate my behavior. He said that he would support me if I did, so now I'm shopping for a therapist. He also said that he would be open for marriage counseling if I wanted to, and I'm considering it. Hopefully, our relationship isn't too damaged, and I can try to be a more patient and understanding partner like he is with me.

Wow, it's super, super rare to have an OP in a story who's actually capable of self-reflection and just being like, wait a second, am I the problem? Oh, I'm the problem. Okay, I'll just fix my behavior. Incredibly rare. Also, this reminds me when my wife and I were looking for houses, before we got this house that we're in right now, we went to this one house one time that had just the most insane grandma energy. You guys know what I'm talking about. Like there were doilies and fancy decorations on everything and teapots and porcelain dolls and frilly little art decorations and an artwork of like little babies in ponds

It was just the most feminine Grandmotherly place I'd ever been in and it was so overwhelming that my wife and I had trouble even Envisioning what the house would be like without all this junk in it. So it wasn't very appealing to us. And I remember we were talking like, man, does a guy live here at all? This is the most feminine house I've ever seen. And then, then we go down to the basement and it is the most masculine man cave I've ever seen.

It had model cars and towers of beer cans and a poker table and a giant TV and football jerseys and just every single like signed baseballs. All the classic guy masculine stuff. And it was just a very clear girl stuff up top, guy stuff down bottom. And it was just so funny to me and my wife because they were as opposite decoration styles as they could possibly be. The most feminine versus the most masculine imaginable. But this couple apparently decided, you know what, instead of arguing, I'll just have

my space, you have your space, and let's just, you know, coexist. We each get our own things that we like. That's kind of the key to being happy in a relationship. Just don't dump on things that makes your partner happy for no reason. Like why would OP tear down the art? It has nothing to do with her. Just let the guy enjoy his art. Our next reddit post is from r slash relationships.

My husband has always been a good man and he's a wonderful father. He also had a great career and was very driven to succeed. But after the kids were born, his passion for me waned. He was once very affectionate and flirty and he couldn't keep his hands off me. We had date nights and would take weekend trips filled with kissing, handholding and lots of passionate hugging. But after the kids, all of that began to fade and it continued to the point that I felt like we were just roommates. I kept myself in shape for him and initiated intercourse often. He would never turn me down, but the intercourse was

lazy. It was basically just get off quick and go to sleep. So after a while, I just stopped initiating. This continued for years, and I'd just grown used to it. I still loved him, I had no desire to cheat or divorce, I just figured this is what happens after kids and I'll just deal with it. Then about a year ago, he got a babysitter and he asked me if I wanted to go away for the weekend, just the two of us. I was shocked but agreed. The entire weekend, he was affectionate and flirty and just fun. He hadn't acted this way in years.

He's a completely different guy and that includes in the bedroom. This might be TMI, but my husband hadn't gone down on me in 10 years and every time he did he was kinda terrible at it. But this time during our vacation he just did it without me asking and he was amazing at it! This new attitude continued when we got home and a few months after that I started to notice that he had lost weight. Shortly after that he started to look more toned as well. He had gotten a bit of a dad bod, but now he looked better

than when we got married. I won't lie, I had difficulty keeping my hands off him. He's basically become the perfect husband overnight and I don't know what happened. He says that he just wanted to be a better husband, but there was no event that triggered it outside of turning 40. Could that be it? I've read that middle-aged men sometimes get in shape because they're looking to cheat, but that's not the case. He's never cheated or had any desire to. We have tracking apps on our phones, so I know where he is at all time.

It's work and home. I also see all of his texts since we share an iPad, so I'm kinda stumped. Then, two days later, OP posted an update. I talked to my husband and asked him if he was taking testosterone as many of the commenters thought that he was. He said no, but was curious why I asked. So we talked a bit, and I really pressed him hard on what was going through his mind to make him change so much, and I was able to tease two things out of him. The first was an incident at work.

It happened about 6 months before he made his transformation and I knew about it at the time because he told me. My husband is a VP of Finance at a rather large private company and two members of his staff were engaging in an affair. The woman involved in the affair was married and about my age and her husband had started to call the office. So it became a thing that he had to deal with since he was their boss. He told me about the event at the time, but I guess this saga dragged on for some months. And when the woman in question

began to open up to others in the office regarding the reason she had the affair, some of the reasons hit home for my husband. Her husband was behaving much like he was. So he thought to himself, this is not going to be me, and he set out to fix it. The second thing I teased out of him is that he quit watching adult videos. Now I do want to say that I don't care that he watched adult videos, I do myself on occasion. But when he did it, and did the deed, it drained any desire that he had for me. I guess this started when the kids were really young and I was just exhausted all the time and he kept it up because it was easy.

He quit doing it to fix our marriage and to get back that desire that he had for me. So he just did it. So after this conversation, a lot of things make sense. I also understand why he didn't want to tell me. He didn't want me to think that the possibility that I could cheat had entered his mind. And the adult video thing is kind of self-explanatory. You know, I like these wholesome, happy, uplifting stories. They're not quite as juicy as like, I walked in on my girlfriend and she was getting plowed by some dude

and then the guy punched me in the face and I got sent to the hospital. But, you know, it's nice face and I got sent to the hospital. But, you know, it's nice that sometimes nice things happen to nice people. That OP's husband was just like, hey, you know what, I think I'll just try to be a better husband tomorrow and then just did it. So I'm happy for you, OP. And your husband too. Sounds like he made a mistake, but eventually he fixed it.

That was our slash best of Redditor updates. And if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.