rSlash - r/Bestof My Boyfriend Got My BFF Pregnant!

Episode Date: May 20, 2023

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These side marios all you can eat is all you can munch a soup salad and garlic home Welcome to our slash best of redditor updates where OPs boyfriend and Pregnates her best friend our next reddit post comes from our slash relationship advice I'm a woman and 15 years ago when I was 18 my best friend who was also 18 got pregnant by my 20-year-old boyfriend who I'd been dating for three years. My family knew about it but didn't tell me so I ran away from home. Now we're back in contact after 15 years and my mom is demanding that I men my relationship with my ex-boyfriend and my ex-friend. When I was 18 and in my senior year of high school, I really believed that my life was on a good track. I live with my parents and my four siblings and spent most of my days hanging out with my best friend Ashley and or my boyfriend of three years, Kyle. Both

Ashley's and Kyle's parents were best friends with my parents, so I knew both of them since I was in diapers. We spent holidays together, birthdays, and visited each other all the time since we lived in the same town. Ashleigh's been my friend for 18 years, and she was truly the person I trusted with everything. Sometimes our parents would joke that we're connected by the hip because we were together all the time. I had been dating Kyle for the last three years. I believed that he was the love of my life and the one that I would eventually marry. We were quite serious and even talked about getting married after he finished college. He was a sophomore at that point.

Even though I had every plan on going to university, I was quite content with the idea of being married to Kyle and being a stay-at-home mom. My parents loved Kyle and supported our relationship. I really was happy. I think I should note here that my 20-year-old sister was also dating Kyle's brother, who's 23, and that all of our siblings were very close. One day, at the beginning of the school year, I noticed that Ashley was being very melancholic and attached. After a bit of prodding, she told me that she was pregnant.

I was very surprised because I knew that she and her boyfriend broke up a while ago, and I didn't know that she had anyone else like that in her life. I asked her who the father was, and she said that she didn't want to talk about it, but she said it in a way that implied that her ex was the father. She was absolutely distraught, so I dropped the topic and just consoled her. I was with her when she told her family, and while her parents were disappointed, they promised to support her in whatever she decides.

They tried to make her share the dad's name, but she refused and made me promise to stay quiet. They didn't know that she had had a boyfriend at that point. I was there for her for the next nine months. I went with her for her ultrasound and doctor's appointments. I was there for her when she was bullied in school for being pregnant. I helped her set up the nursery. I was there when she was sick or just felt down. I held a baby shower for her.

I went shopping with her. I even took some parenting classes with her. We chose names together, and she even asked me to be with her in the delivery room. I noticed that their pregnancy was really taking a toll on her emotionally and physically, and I tried to support her in every way possible. She was my best friend, always there for me, and I loved her. Some two weeks before her due date, I went to the mall to run some errands, and I ran into her ex. Although I promised to never contact him, the knowledge of my friend's

emotional state sent me into a fit of anger and I confronted him. I gave him a piece of my mind, told him what a piece of garbage he was for leaving his ex-pregnant and alone and not caring for his unborn child. He was shocked and said that he had no idea what I was talking about. I actually never told him about the pregnancy, and when I told him that she was nine months pregnant at the time, he said that it wasn't possible for him to be the father, as they broke up over a year ago and they had had no relation since then. I was confused, but apologize for yelling at him in the middle of the mall. After that, he became snarky, said some nasty stuff, and mentioned that maybe I should ask Ashley's friend Kyle if he's the daddy.

I didn't really thank too much about what he said. Kyle and Ashley have been friends their entire lives. We were always very close, because of our parents relationship, but they never showed any sign of being anything more. That evening, my 14-year-old younger sister and I were preparing to have a movie night. I began ranting to my sister about confronting Ashley's ex and the things he said. My sister, who's usually very outspoken, got quiet, and didn't really respond to anything I said.

After a while, she excused herself and went to the bathroom. I decided to go and get some snacks, and I went downstairs to the kitchen, and I heard my younger sister berating my mother. My sister told my mom about me running into Ashley's ex, and told my mom that she no longer wanted to hide from me the fact that Kyle was Ashley's ex and told my mom that she no longer wanted to hide for me the fact that Kyle was Ashley's baby's father. I was shocked! Absolutely shocked!

I stumbled into the kitchen and demanded an explanation. Both my mom and my sister became white as a sheet when they saw me and my sister started crying her eyes out. My sister explained to me that during the end of the summer break, Kyl and Ashley attended the same house party, got drunk and slept together. Ashley got pregnant and told Kyle, but they were both ashamed and afraid of telling me. They also didn't share this with their parents. Ashley, however, couldn't keep the secret and told her mom and dad, who told Kyle's parents and later mine as well.

This all happened when Ashley was in her first trimester. By the second trimester, all of my siblings, Kyle's siblings, and Ashley's siblings knew about this. Everyone except me! I simply cannot explain the way that I felt. I was physically ill for the next three days and I couldn't speak to anyone. My parents were apologetic, but explained that they didn't want to see me hurt or ruin everyone's relationship. I didn't speak with Kyle or Ashley, although they've bombarded my phone with messages and calls and also came to my house. I refused to see them. At one point Kyle's mom came to our house and my mom allowed her into my room. While I was lying in my bed, still sick and just emotionally drained from the betrayal, she tried to convince me to forgive them and how Ashley and the baby

need me. I said nothing. Two weeks later, Ashley went into labor. I learned from my parents that she had a hard delivery. She lost a lot of blood and needed an emergency C-section. Kyle apparently was at the birth. I was distraught and consolable. I had planned to be there, but because of the betrayal of both of them, I physically and emotionally couldn't. But I had been looking forward to this moment for months for so many reasons. My older sister immediately went to the hospital to be with her boyfriend. My other siblings weren't at home, so I was left alone with my parents.

All I wanted was to lay in my bed or cuddle in my bed with my mom and cry all of my feelings out. My mom received a call from Ashley's mom. She came to my room and told me that she and my dad were going to the hospital. I was perplexed and asked my mom to stay with me instead. She said that Ashley's parents need all the support they can get and that we'll discuss everything later. I tried to tell her not to go and that I also need their support. But she said not to be selfish and they left. I was left alone at the house,

and I just couldn't comprehend what happened in the last few weeks. I just couldn't believe that my parents would go and support someone who hurt me so much while I was also here suffering. Am I really selfish to think like that? I don't know when, but my sadness turned into rage. The kind I had never experienced before. In a fit of combined emotions and feelings of betrayal, I started packing my bags and decided to leave home. After a while, I received a text from my sister. The text said that Ashley had given birth to a healthy girl and that they were both okay.

She attached a picture of the newborn and told me they named her Sarah. She sent a second text a while later telling me that she and my parents were going to join Ashley's and Kyle's parents and going to a bar in the town to celebrate. I don't remember much after that. I think I was just consumed by everything and my memory is very foggy. So I left. I took the train and left. I stayed at a hostel in Phoenix for a while, I got a job at a store and planned to finish high school there. My parents, siblings, Kyle and Ashley tried to contact me. My mom was sending me panicked voicemails demanding me to come back.

They also reported me as a missing person, but I don't think it went anywhere since I was 18. Anyways, soon after I met Dean, who's 21. He also lived in Phoenix, and he had a complicated relationship with his family. We really connected and became friends. He helped me a lot at that time when I struggled. I had no idea how to take care of myself, or to literally just be an adult. He introduced me to his group of friends, helped me finish high school, and I moved in with him and his friends. He helped me deal with my pain. He was there

for me, and supported me through everything, and I don't think I would have lasted long without him. We began dating after a year. He inherited some money from his grandpa, and decided to move across the country to the big city. Even though we hadn't been together for long, he asked me to go with him. I was a bit reluctant because we both had a lot of emotional baggage, and I was still very insecure in my situation, but I did go. We moved, got jobs, and tried to survive. Soon after my 21st birthday, we decided to get married.

It was a crazy, spontaneous decision, but we did it. I enrolled in university and Dean helped me pay for it. Dean started a company which took off and we were able to live more comfortably. I was in university and also worked part-time to contribute. We had our ups and downs, but somehow survived. After university, I started working in his company and we slowly built it up. When I look back now, I don't think that I was in love with Dean when we got married. I loved him, but I wasn't in love.

But he was there for me, always unconditionally. And today, I don't think that I could love him more. He's the love of my life. We've been married for 12 years now, and we have a two-year-old son and a six-month-old son. Sometimes I regret leaving my family behind, but I just couldn't go back. It was very painful. I felt like my parents chose Ashley and Kyle over me. I did go to a therapist when I was 25 and tried to deal with my emotions. Tis the season for making memories with family and friends.

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Let me point out that Evelyn didn't know what transpired 15 years ago, so the conversations were pretty innocent. We talked about her school, her interests, and she talked about my family. I learned that I had 10 nieces and nephews. I also learned that Kyle married Ashley four years after I left and had two sons beside Sarah. My parents continued to have a friendship with Kyle's and Ashley's family, and to me, it really felt like my family continued their normal life, despite me being gone. She tried to talk to me about what happened, but I didn't really think

that it was my place to explain things to her. So I simply said that relationships change, and things happen in life that make us go our separate ways. We continue talking every so often for almost a year. In an email that she sent in January, she expressed how the pandemic had a big effect on her entire family, and how my parents were struggling to keep their house and both my brothers lost their job and struggled to keep up with their costs. I was surprised that she knew about all this, and she was only 14, but the hardship was also causing tension between her parents. I started to deal with a lot of guilty feelings and regrets.

I had also just had my babies, so this was causing me lots of emotions. I talked to my husband and he was very supportive and told me that he would be there for me for whatever I decide. We're financially stable and the pandemic didn't have a great impact on our finances. We're not rich, but we are able to live comfortably. After learning some more details and talking to my husband, we decided to help my parents with their house. A week ago, we flew back to my home state

and I saw my family for the first time in 15 years. I had so many emotions, regrets, pains from the past, feelings of betrayal. I think my parents were relieved to see me. It was just such a weird day. We had a lengthy conversation and agreed to try to have some kind of cordial relationship. So far, I'm still very awkward with them. Sometimes they feel like strangers.

Dean and I spent a week there and we all continue to have conversations, and I truly believe that we were on a path to having a friendly, yet distant relationship. But then, my mom started insisting I have a sit-down conversation with Kyle and Ashley. She explained that she wants to go back to the way things were. I told her that I refused to talk to them. Although I moved on, I simply have no ties with them now, and I don't want to rehash anything with them. I told her that I'm prepared to try and establish a relationship with them as they're my family, but that I don't want anything to do with Kyle, Ashley, or their family.

I never demanded that they stop having a relationship with their friends, but I don't want a relationship with them. Dean supports me in this. My mom called me selfish and said that I simply must try to heal our relationship. I told her I will not negotiate, and it's on her to decide whether or not she wants to have a relationship with me. She agreed, but two days later I received a phone call from Kyle's mom. I did not give her my number.

She demanded. Yes, demanded. I talk with Kyle and Ashley because my return had caused tensions in their relationship and their emotional health. I hung up. I called my mom and confronted her. Apparently she gave that woman my number to heal our family bonds. I told her that she is once again choosing them over me. She cried

and yelled at me that I'm selfish and that she just wants her family back. I hung up. It's been days since I spoke to any of them, although my mom and Kyle's mom keeps on calling me. Although I think that I'm right, and I believe that I should prioritize the well-being of me, my husband, and my sons, I'm starting to have some regrets. I don't know if I should prioritize the well-being of me, my husband, and my sons. I'm starting to have some regrets. I don't know if I should listen to my mom and speak to Ashley and Kyle. I'm questioning whether I'm truly being selfish for not actively trying to repair the relationship. I'm so lost, and I don't know what to do.

So before I get into the update, I just want to say real quick, that I think what really is going on here isn't that op's parents are choosing Ashley and Kyle over op, I think what they're really doing is choosing their friendships over op. I don't think they're really that invested in Kyle and Ashley. I think they just really like their friends and they don't want to lose their friendship with the other parents in their friend group, so that's what they're trying to protect. I think. Now, still, that doesn't make it any worse, they're still choosing their friendships over their own daughter, which is awful, but that's just what my gut is saying. Then, two years later, OP posted an update. I never mentioned my little sister in my original post. Her relationship with my parents went downhill after I left home, and she went no contact with

them when she was 20. I received her number from our older sister and although it was awkward at first, it has been 15 years after all. We did start speaking again. She was very angry at me for leaving. A lot has happened in our life and it wasn't the easiest. She has a toddler and a baby of her own and I have to say that kids have helped us bond again. She's my best friend and we talk every day. As for my other siblings, I'm in regular contact with my brothers, although we aren't close.

My older sister and I have a good relationship now, but last year we had a longer period of not speaking. Since she's married to Kyle's brother, it was hard for her to deal with all the family drama. We're cool now, and I have a lovely relationship with my nieces and nephews. Now to my parents. My mom didn't let up with her pestering over me not talking to Kyle and Ashley. Her phone calls to me continued for months,

even after I flew back home. It boarded on emotional blackmail. She blamed me for not honoring her wishes for her friendship problems, her health problems, and even accused me of keeping her grandbabies from her. Last June, I had my daughter, and it seems like that center completely off the rails. I'm talking a hundred calls a day, messages every 20 minutes to pastor me about random things, and sending me updates about people that I never want to know about.

But then, when she started pestering Dean, I was done. I was afraid to block her, so I spoke to my father. This was probably the first time in the last 17 years that he and I had a true heart-to-heart conversation. I was emotionally drained, tired from caring for three children, and just over everything. I probably poured all of my feelings and emotions into him. I don't know what happened to them afterwards. He doesn't speak much about it.

Her call slowly ceased, and something else must have happened, because in August, he filed for divorce. My father and I are in regular contact, although I don't think we'll ever be back to normal. My mom is devastated. In August, her calls became insane, and apparently not just with me. I've changed my number since then, and ever since February, she hasn't been able to reach me. I've been told by one of my brothers that she has problems with anxiety and depression and lost a lot of friends. I don't know about whether or not she continues to have a relationship with Kyle and Ashley's family.

I don't want to have anything to do with her anymore nor do I want her near my kids. The things she said to me are crazy. Although I regret not having a mom, I feel like fighting to repair the little remnants of our relationship would be a waste of my emotional energy and just pure torture. As for Kyle's mom, I blocked her and I've received no other calls from anyone. I really don't know what they're doing or where they are. I've had no contact with them. The only other thing that happened is things really went out of control when my brother-in-law, Kyle's brother, brought me a letter that was apparently written by Ashley. I haven't opened it, and really, I don't know if I want to. I feel like I've moved on from them,

but on the other hand, I'm curious as to what she has to say after so many years. However, that in itself could bring back bad emotions. I'm doing okay now with my babies and Dean, who's been a real trooper through all of this. I'm trying to focus on my family, and I really hope that this is all behind me. OP, I doubt you'll see this, but in the off chance you do, I say burn the letter. All it's gonna do is just dig up bad emotions because what's it gonna do? Option 1 is she's apologetic, which still doesn't change the damage she calls to you and

your family. Or 2, she's mean and entitled and blaming you for everything, which is just gonna make the situation worse as well. They say the best revenge is a life well lived, and it sounds like you're doing that. So just go leave your life, ignore these people who are bringing down your relationship, because you're better off without them. Ashley is toxic, Kyle is toxic, and your mom is mega toxic. The only person between you and your husband who I kind of feel sorry for is your younger sister because yeah, she shouldn't have kept that secret from you, but at the same time she's 14. Your mom expecting her 14 year old daughter to have that burden to carry that secret is awful.

I also feel like it's kind of unfair of her to get mad at you for leaving. Because I mean, yeah, on the one hand I can understand why she'd be upset because you leaving kind of triggered all these things in the family, all this drama that tanked her relationships. But I mean, you're the victim here, so to get angry at the victim isn't really fair, but she was 14, so I've got mixed feelings about the sister. Mostly I feel bad for her because she was just too young to deal with all this stuff. That was our slash best of Redditor updates, and if you liked this content, be sure to follow

my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day. And if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.