rSlash - r/Bestof My Husband is in Love with My Sister

Episode Date: December 8, 2024

0:00 Intro 0:11 Family love 9:08 Physical affection 13:37 Expectations Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

70,000 people are here and Bob Dylan is the reason for it. Inspired by the true story. If anyone is going to hold your attention on the stage, it's kind of be a freak. Are you a freak? Hope so. And starring Timothy Chalamet as Bob Dylan, he defied everyone. Turn it down! Play it loud!

To change everything. Make some noise BD. Timothy Chalamet, Edward Norton, Elle Fanny, Monica Barbaro. A complete unknown. Only theaters Christmas Day. Welcome to r slash best of redditor updates, where OP discovers that her husband is deeply obsessed with her sister. Our next reddit post is from r slash true off my chest. I'm a 28 year old woman and my husband is 33. My husband told me that he's in love with my sister who's 32. I'm pregnant and I don't know why this is happening to me.

My sister and I had a terrible life growing up with a passive mother and abusive stepfather. My sister was my protector and role model since none of the adults were. My sister tried to shift my stepdad's abuse onto her whenever he got drunk so that he wouldn't hurt me. When she left for college, she let me stay in her bed while she slept on the floor in her student room. That happened after I managed to run away from home. When I turned 16, she let me move in with her permanently.

We never saw our parents again. My husband is very similar to my sister. They're both very calm and kind. Both very intelligent. They have the same sense of humor, love the same music, books, movies and games. It's like a weird perverted thing that I found the male version of my sister to fall in love with. They get along very well, and that was so important to me because they're my only

family. We got married a year ago after six years together, and I'm now 27 weeks pregnant with our first baby. My sister met her boyfriend, who's 30, a year ago. He got along very well with me and my husband, although I always felt that my husband never really liked the guy. When I asked him once why he didn't like him, my husband got flustered and told me that he didn't know that it was noticeable and apologized. He told me that he just didn't think that he was good enough for her. My sister's boyfriend proposed to my sister last night. We were just having pizzas and they were

having beers in my sister's balcony and the boyfriend just suddenly went down on his knees and took out a ring. My sister was very surprised, but happy all the same and said yes. When we went back home, my husband was a little tipsy. He told me that he wasn't tired and he's going to take one more beer and watch TV and that I should just go to bed. Later I went back to the living area and he was sitting there crying. I asked him what was going on and he told me that he was in love with my sister. He has been for years, but he knew how wrong this was.

He told me he loved me very much and he promised to be a good husband and father to our daughter. He slept on the couch and he's still asleep now. I'm shocked and full of anxiety. I don't know what to do or how to feel about this. Should I tell my sister? Nothing can be the same again, but she's my only family and my best friend. And as for my husband, is this over? I've been so blind, but now I see everything.

Of course he's in love with her, how could I be shocked now?" Then OP posted an update. He apologized for hurting me last night. He said that he just felt despair, like he had something very beloved and important in his life and he lost it and was mourning it. He told me he loved me very much and he wanted this to work for us and the baby. I asked him if he loved her more than me and he said it's just a different type of love. I asked him if he could choose between me or her and he said that he would

choose me. I asked him if he thought that she was more beautiful and he said that I'm conventionally more attractive. I asked him if he stayed with me all these years just to be near her. He said that I was being unfair to him because he did love me. Is he okay never seeing her again? He teared up and then said that he would do anything to save this marriage. He then added that he had never really had a mother or a female figure in his life. That's probably why he's so attached to her because she's very warm and loving.

I asked, do you love her as a mother figure or do you want to sleep with her? He didn't want to answer. Which probably means both. I asked him if he fantasized about her while sleeping with me. He refused to answer and then said, why are you doing this to yourself? I asked, will you lose interest in me if she's out of our lives and it's just us? He looked like he was thinking about this for the first time, and then he said that he would choose me and my baby. He wants to start therapy and counseling because he thinks this marriage is salvageable. Then OP posted another update.

We had dinner with my sister and her fiance. My husband was unusually silent and didn't initiate any talk with my sister, and he barely looked at her. It was a nice dinner. My sister was too happy to notice anything, with her engagement and her trip tomorrow. Before she went, however, my husband hugged her longer than usual. He told her he was happy for her and wished her a great trip. Then he held her hand and told her, I didn't congratulate you properly yesterday because

I was drunk. And then he congratulated her. He was tearing up. Then he hugged my sister's fiance and congratulated him. He was silent on our way home. He told me he loved me when we got back and that he'll do anything to make this work, but that I shouldn't make any decision while I was hurt. We're starting couples therapy. I want him to be 100% honest. He asked me not to tell anyone

about the confession because it meant nothing. I told him that I didn't want him around my sister anymore if I did give him a chance. He asked me how this would work since me and my sister are always together. She'll suspect something, and he still doesn't want me to tell her because he's embarrassed. I told him that he could just minimize his interactions with her. I told him to sleep on the couch again tonight because I haven't made up my mind about my next move yet, and so until then, it's the couch for him. Then OP posted an update which is a bit dry so I'm just going to summarize. Basically they started marriage counseling, it's going OK, and OP decided not to tell her sister.

Then OP posted another pretty long update, I'm going to summarize the first half, where basically OP discovers that her sister is pregnant. Then OP continues. A week ago, my husband was in a job interview in another city, and he was going to stay there for the week to sign a lease on a new apartment. My sister and her fiance made the announcement that they were expecting a baby last Tuesday, which was the day after my husband's interview. Not thirty minutes later, my husband called me.

He was drunk and was crying and asking if it was true and if I knew. He called me a cruel liar for not telling him. He said that it was so unfair, that my sister's fiance is a loser and he doesn't deserve her. To be clear, her fiance is a carpenter and my sister is a pediatrician. And he told me that he needed to be alone for a while so he switched off his phone. Friday he texted me that he didn't want to be with me anymore and that he didn't want to be in my daughter's life.

He was sorry, but he couldn't do it anymore. If I agreed to free him from his responsibilities as a father, he would leave me the house. I tried calling him, but he switched off his phone again. I cried all night. Yesterday morning, my sister called me to ask what's up. My husband had asked her to meet up with him because he wanted to tell her something that he couldn't say over the phone. That he was coming by on Monday to see her.

She asked me what was going on, but I was too tired to tell her anything. She and her fiance are coming over today and I'll probably need to tell her everything now. Then OP posted an update. My sister was here and I'll probably need to tell her everything now." Then OP posted an update. "...My sister was here and I told her everything. I told her that my husband wanted to meet her probably to tell her that he loved her. Or maybe something more sinister so she needed to stay away from him. Her fiancé was on the edge of his seat with anger.

My sister was just crying and apologizing and trying to hug and stroke my hair. I hated her touch. I don't know why. I know nothing is her fault. I told my sister that now that I've warned her I want to be on my own for a while and that I didn't want any contact with any of them. I've been thinking about moving to another city. I texted my husband that I've told my sister everything and that both her and her fiancee

aren't happy. He called me an hour later. He apologized and told me that he and that both her and her fiance aren't happy. He called me an hour later, he apologized and told me that he didn't mean to freak her out. He just wanted to see her and say goodbye but that he won't bother her if she feels scared. He's still the same man and wouldn't let anything happen to her. He didn't ask about me or my baby.

He's staying in a new place and starting his new job in September. He just thought that he would come back and say goodbye to my sister before moving to the new city permanently. My sister texted me that she loved me and that she would stay out of my way if that's what I wanted, but to please not go through with my plans to move. Because she needs me and she would do anything to make it up to me. I didn't answer. I hate it when she's so perfect and kind.

F off. What I love so much about this story is that this guy thinks that the fiance isn't good enough for this woman. And granted, the sister here really is a catch because she protected and supported her sister. She raised her younger sister while she went through medical school and she became a pediatrician, which is just super, super remarkable. But apparently this guy thinks that he is good enough for her when he's a cheating, lying loser. Hey, I'd take a carpenter over a cheating, lying loser any day of the week. Our next Reddit post is from r slash relationship advice.

I'm a 36 year old woman and my husband is 34. We've been married for two years, together for five years, and we used to be very affectionate with each other in a way that was playful, flirty, and warm. A couple of months ago, he decided that I was too clingy and that he wanted to be the one to initiate all physical contact from then on. To be clear, I do not think that I'm clingy. I initiate hugs and kisses a few times a day with a few other casual touches like a hand on the shoulder, but I'm very far from groping him every second. I know that he's also been coming to terms with some issues from a very difficult childhood

at that time, so I wanted to give him space and not make this about me, especially as he promised to continue being regularly affectionate. And he has done so, maybe a bit less than before, but we still have some affectionate touches, initiated by him every day, and more intimate activities a couple of times a week. It used to be more often, but again, I know he's going through some stuff. A few days ago, I found out at work that I had gotten a big promotion and bonus. When I got home, I was so excited that I threw my arms around him, thereby violating his rule that he needed to be the one to initiate contact.

He immediately pushed me away and got extremely angry. To be clear, it wasn't a sexual hug at all, more like the kind that you would see sports team members giving each other when they win a big game. I tried to apologize, but he started yelling about how I'm an abuser and traumatized him. He asked me to leave. I understand from his brother that after I left, he tried to go to the cops to press charges. But they said that a quick hug from one's wife, even if it wasn't really wanted or expected, was not the kind of thing that they're going to prosecute. He's now threatening to call my employer to tell them that I'm an abuser who engages

in sexual misconduct in my personal life. I'm not asking for legal advice about that here. What I am asking is, honestly, would he be justified in telling my employer about what happened? I did make a terrible mistake, even if it wasn't malicious. I believe people are allowed to determine that they don't want others to initiate touch and should have bodily autonomy. Just because I wouldn't be traumatized over a hug doesn't mean that he shouldn't be.

I am willing to accept that he may very well divorce me over this and that I may lose other important friendships and family relationships. But should I also lose my job? Then 5 days later, OP posted an update. So things came to a head, but not in the way that I was expecting. My husband's brother continued to stay with my husband while I stayed at a hotel. After a couple of days, I got a call from my brother-in-law asking me to come home so that we could talk.

Turns out, my husband has been having an affair with an intern at his company, a 21 year old, and is deeply in love and wants to be with her. My husband told his brother about this shortly after I left. He wanted to make ME the bad guy, so he first started with the no touching rule figuring that I would get fed up with it, or that eventually I would make a mistake and he could use that to claim that I was an abuser and then I'd be the bad guy. It was also a way to reduce intimacy of all types with me while he was falling out of love with me and into love with his affair partner. So he just made stuff up about his trauma flaring up, and he isn't actually having

a psychotic break. Although obviously he has some level of mental health problems to be doing something so cruel. For what it's worth, he did apologize sort of. He said that he was just so in love with the other woman and he couldn't deal with hurting me directly by leaving me right away. So he came up with this plan. And he just got a little too caught up in character when I gave him the mistaken hug with

calling me an abuser and making a police report and threatening my job. We sat down and talked about everything, with my brother-in-law as a mediator, and agreed to a cordial quick divorce, dividing assets 50-50. Thankfully, no pets or kids involved. I know that I could probably make things harder for him under the circumstances, but I really just want to move on as soon as possible and put all this behind me. I have a good job and income and I don't need anything from him other than my freedom ASAP. Well, even though the cops won't prosecute a hug from a wife, I wonder if they will prosecute

filing a false police report just to get back at your wife. Our next Reddit post is from beforetimes. I'm a mid-level college administrator. One of my direct reports is positioning himself to move up in a couple of years, from department member to department head. He would still report to me, but the working relationship would be a little different. I need to work closely with department heads, and it can have a major impact on my work and the organization if that relationship is toxic.

The problem is that this guy thinks that he is a lot smarter than me. He apparently read something about managing up, and now he's trying to manage me, and he is very, very bad at it. His attempts to manipulate me are clumsy and obvious, but he doesn't realize that I know what he's doing, because he's sure that he's much smarter than me. There's also some sexism going on here. I'm female and he seems to have some problems with that sometimes. And I'm relatively new to the organization, so he doesn't know me well.

Every conversation degenerates into incredibly irritating condescension and smugness on his part. For example, he said things like, My expectation is that you'll give me a hint if you think there might be a change coming up. I'll say, no, not happening. I try to squelch rumors, not spread them. And if there's a change coming, your department head will know first. My expectation is that you will change the meeting time. No, that meeting involved 27 people, and it's been scheduled for a month, and I won't reschedule it just for you.

And regarding a minor snafu with the bookstore, I'm sure you understand why you have to have this person fired. I said, let's just talk about how we're going to handle a fairly small problem. And about a trivial department matter that could have easily been resolved before it even got to me, I know that you'll do the right thing and bring this to the Chief Academic Officer, which is the equivalent of a CEO. I just said, here's the solution and what we're going to do. He always ends with a smirk and a slow nod. His body language says that he's certain he's programmed me to respond correctly.

Right now I just smile, ignore it whenever possible, and get back to the issue at hand. Occasionally I've addressed it head on when I need to clarify that he will definitely not be getting what he wants this time. I want to call him out on this, because it's getting very tiresome. It also sidetracks the conversation away from the important stuff that we need to be discussing. And I don't enjoy being treated with such disrespect. If he does become the department head, it'll be even more important that he has some respect for my intelligence. I'm tempted to give him a book on the topic and tell him that he needs to study more before trying this again.

But in calmer moments, I know that level of bluntness will just embarrass him and put him on the defensive. How can I stop this behavior without doing too much damage to our work relationship? Or do I just have to put up with sentences that start with, my expectation is that you will forever? Then a few months later later OP posted an update. I had been out for a couple of weeks, minor surgery, and so I hadn't interacted with this guy for a while.

After I returned, there was a minor incident involving a student complaint. I sent an email to this guy and one other person to let them know the issue had been resolved. He showed up at my office and the dialogue went like this. My expectation was that in this situation you would do such and such instead. I said, why did you expect that? What? You've developed a habit of telling me what you think I should be doing. It's not useful and I need you to stop. I'm just trying to help. I was hired here because I have a lot of experience in this kind of work. I do actually know what I'm doing.

Well I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings by trying to help you. This isn't about anyone's feelings, mine or yours. I treat you as a professional, and I need you to treat me the same way. That's the best way for both of us to do our jobs and serve the college mission. And that's what we're here to do. Um, right. We've had that conversation, and since then, he hasn't used that phrase again. A couple of times, I could see it struggling to come out, but so far, he's held it back.

He's not being bubbly and overflowing with camaraderie, but he's still speaking to me, not obstructing me, and he's leaving me alone so I can do my job. And even better, he's taken himself out of the running for department chair. I overheard something about having to be around ball busting women all the time, but I'm sure that was just a rumor. Man, this dude bought one book that he probably got off of some like YouTuber or TikToker's course, and then suddenly thought that he had mind control powers. That was our slash best of Redditor updates and if you liked this content be sure to follow

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